Unsung Silence
by Draconic Ban-Sidhe
Summary: A year after the Shikon was restored, she's stuck at home. Kagome wants nothing but to return to the past... until the past comes looking for her, in a most unexpected way. Can Sesshoumaru and Kagome help each other out.... or not? SxK
1. Prologue

Disclaimer: Ok, I've decided I'm only doing one of these things for this entire story, unless it pertains to a particular chapter…..got rather tired of it towards the end of my last story, truth be told…..no need to rub it in my face that I _don't_ own anything…

So. I own nothing from the original manga, anime and/or movies of Inuyasha (including Sess :'( , despite numerous attempts to purchase the rights on e-bay. Whatever didn't happen in the original work was the creation of a mind heavily under the influence of raspberry tea, and under the recurring hallucination that she's a pirate. I'm not getting anything from this, other than fun and sore fingers, and a PMSing computer named Nitty who now likes to crash. (Nitty got formatted for that…-.-)Yay:P

Seriously though. What nutcase would write fanfiction if they were the actual author? (Don't answer that…)

**_One or two important things I'll say now_**…..I don't usually write long authors notes, compared to what you can find in some places

**1. **Thanks to a few very important people! Family of course, for forbidding the writing of fanfiction and thereby guaranteeing my interest, VB, for putting up with me, and TrisakAminawn. Never a dull moment! Thank you so much for everything you've done!

**2.** I know there are many viewpoints on the fluffy item Sesshoumaru has on his shoulder. For the purposes of this story, it's a tail. I'm not sure what it is, though I'm inclined to think it is actually a symbol of rank. However, I decided it would be a tail for this story, like the last one. Much more fun!

**3. **Alrighty…for those of you who remember/and or care, this is that sess/kag story I've been working on for a bit. I've actually written, and had (much) help editing up to chapter 20ish…which means regular updates for 20ish weeks (cheers of disbelief from those who know about my updating 'habits') I have no idea how original this idea is…..but this is my take on it. I hope you enjoy.

- Lumbe/Draconic Ban-Sidhe

**: Prologue :**

He stared dully at the wall across from him. It hadn't changed at all…the dust was thicker, and he was weaker, than when the sun had last angled across the old wooden floorboards. He wished he had the energy to hate the passing of another day in this room, but he didn't. Fighting to get out had taken all he had…and hadn't done anything for him, in the end. He was tired of that wall, and the cracked plaster fallen to the floor. It had piled along the floorboards, uncovering the bricks beneath. He was tired of the cramped, stuffy feeling he got if he thought too hard about the closet he was in. He didn't like closets this small.

Gods, he hated those bricks…although it was a rather tired hate, it was still something.

There was a spider-web in one corner. He'd been briefly amused as he watched it spun, then fall to old silk. It had been a small moment of difference in the endless unchanging atmosphere.

That's all this room was. Sun, and the ages old scent of dust in the old air. For as long as he'd been here, that's all he'd seen, heard or smelled. A quiet, noiseless passing of time, and the whisper of grit in the air slowly settling on the floor. He hated it. He was just a shell, watching as he was buried in time. He could hear the dust piling up on him, and couldn't move to even brush it off his shoulder. He was trapped here, trapped in himself, constrained from doing even that simple thing.

Rather odd that he was worried about the state of his clothes from the dusty assault. He must be going crazy in this washed out tomb…insane from the loss of freedom. The loss of Rin.

He was alone with the empty stillness inside and without. No sounds whispered above the dust, not even the ghostly flute of death. There was nothing to distract him from brooding upon why he was here, why he was doomed to die eventually in this little piece of grey hell. He'd not understood the true horror of this room at first, not until he'd spent an eternity in here. There was nothing to see, nothing to feel. Nothing to stop him from turning inside himself and tearing himself apart because he hadn't been able to stop Damia. He'd let it all happen.

His fault…

Sesshoumaru knew he'd put himself here because of his own mistakes. He'd killed Rin through his arrogance.

He really did deserve part of this. If not for the two aforementioned crimes, then surely some of his many other sins had caught up to him, and were being paid for. He wasn't normally one to care about anything. He'd stopped caring a long time ago. What was done was done, and you paid for it. Everything had a price.

He decided this one was a bit high for his taste.

It was the sensory deprivation that was the worst, he'd decided. For someone such as himself, accustomed to the heightened senses of a Taiyoukai, it was pure hell. Even his mind was dying here, going mad with the constant grey of the wall. He'd counted the bricks, and the floorboards. (There were 7 on the top row. 6 in the one below, then again and 6 once more on the bottom. 26 altogether. He went back and counted again…and again…and again...)

He was sure that wall mocked him, bricks leaning together to whisper beyond even his hearing about the pathetic captive by the window…perhaps they were plotting to fall on him…

He couldn't remember what his private garden looked like, or how his mother's music had whispered in the dawns stillness. He desperately wished he could just turn around and see out the window behind him, but could never manage it. He wasn't free to do even that.

Just to see green again….even if it was weeds, he wanted to see green…anything other than grimy grey. He could scarcely see color at all now…what did it look like? He had a moment of dull panic, trying to recall the forest outside his garden…what had it looked like? He didn't know. It was all a dream from long ago, faded into the grey, and deeper grey shadows of the wall. He could barely remember Rin's face…

It always came back to her, in the end.

He could almost remember the way it had been the first time he'd seen her. She'd found him half dead in the forest, and hadn't run. Most children would have screamed and gotten away from a potentially fatal encounter with an injured youkai as fast as they could, but not her.

She had been different even then, decorated with old wounds and healing scabs. He had wondered, and had since learned the truth. The village had beaten her after her family died. She had been silent then.

He knew silence as well as she. Special, that human…his Rin. In this prison, he could let himself admit it. There was no one to use it against him, no one to undercut his position in the power plays and double dealing of court, no one at all. There was just him, and his ever present thoughts.

She hadn't seemed to care about the danger, and had smiled her gap toothed smile at him. He still couldn't understand that smile…

After he'd healed…..he'd left without a thought. But…she had called him back, the sharp scent of her blood splashed to the forest floor compelling him to come and see what had happened. Had she been beaten again? He wasn't sure even now why he'd done it. Perhaps …curiosity? It couldn't be caring….

He'd been somewhat shocked when she'd come back to life beneath Tenseiga's blade, and even more so when she elected to follow his wandering feet. He'd let her tag along more out of curiosity than anything, and a reluctance to kill someone he'd actually gone to the trouble of bringing back to the world of the living. He'd assumed she'd leave him soon enough…

…..and she had….she had left him after all…..all because he was too stupid to post a better guard, too arrogant to believe anyone would have the audacity to attack him within his own home.

Tenseiga wouldn't work twice. He couldn't heal her again, however much he screamed at the sword within his head, raining curses on its carefully crafted length. What good was a sword of healing and life renewed, if it couldn't bring her back to him? What good was all his power if he couldn't do that single thing?

He sighed softly in his mind. Rin…she'd followed him, and at first he'd tolerated her. Looking back, he couldn't start to see where he'd begun to treat her as more than a passing whim, but as something more. Something to be protected, indulged. Something precious…something loved.

It was impossible, and he knew it. He did not love anything, not even his own life. It was ridiculous. Him consider loving a human?

But Rin…

He'd never once told her how much she'd come to mean to him before the end.

Never once just stopped and given her even a word or two to let her know she meant _something _to him. He found it difficult after all these years to even acknowledge to himself she had been his 'daughter', that he'd loved her as much as he would have loved his own.

It was difficult just to make himself see that and admit it within his heart even now, alone. It had been impossible for him to say it aloud then. He had never given voice to affection when it would have meant something. He should have. He should have said something, done something….he knew he wouldn't have. He couldn't.

He remembered once, that she had asked him if he would remember her when she died. He had been somewhat taken aback by the question, unsure of what to answer. He had never had any people skills to speak of…

111111111111111111

_"Don't be foolish." 'Of course I'd remember you Rin. I could never forget you.' Sesshoumaru looked up, watching as Jaken came closer, staff bobbing in time with his head._

_"Sesshoumaru-sama, I've brought you AhUn…" Jaken blinked, unsure of what the slight surprise on Sesshoumaru's face meant. He'd missed Rin's startling question. "Um, Sesshoumaru-sama, where will you be going…?"_

_  
"It's hardly worth mentioning. I'm going to find Naraku." 'You're going to pay for what you've done, Naraku. No one kidnaps Rin and gets away with it any more than they deface my father's tomb.' He absently wokked Jaken on the head, more out of habit than malice._

_"Yes, of course." Jaken rubbed at his head, where a bump from the staff of heads was already forming. He picked up the staff. "Would it please you if I should come along?"_

_Rin laughed, and smiled at the little toad. "It's hardly worth mentioning."_

_"Huh?" Jaken always was somewhat slow on the uptake._

_"Of course you should come, Jaken-sama!" She laughed and ran after him, pausing until Jaken caught up, staff waving above his head wildly. Then they both ran after him through the field, one of Sesshoumaru's long strides as many as three of Rin's shorter ones._

_'What a strange question…You never cease to surprise me, Rin. You and your eternal smile…why do you smile, after everything you have come though?'_

Maybe she had known…maybe she had known how much she'd been worth to him. He had just rescued her from Ungai-sama and his priests after all….

It wasn't the same.

He should have said something….he should have never left her alone. He knew he wouldn't have said it, not then, but it didn't stop him berating himself. He should have…Sesshoumaru danced around the edges of self doubt, knowing that one misstep would send him tumbling down into the hole that had opened in the center of his now very empty life.

Where Rin had been, that hole was. Amazing how much space a single person so small could take up. If he ever fell in that hole, he knew he'd never come out. He'd be so lost to despair by then he wouldn't care. If you could call this life, this mere existence, caring. He wasn't sure he was still sane, still withstanding the torturous grey fog.

He'd managed to hold himself back at the start. He'd had hopes of escaping his prison then, and had focused on that, on sanity, like a drowning man clinging to a board. In his most lucid moments he'd wanted to get out and skin Damia alive. No one imprisoned him. No one killed someone under his protection. Especially not Rin. Not his little girl. _No one_.

_'No youkai should kill a child like that, regardless of whose it was.'_

He had his honor. He would never have done what she had, even before he came across Rin and she'd melted him just a little. Killed a child certainly….but….not that way. He'd have done away in one clean stroke. You didn't torment you opponents needlessly. _Especially_ not a child

A hole like the one he could feel now, you could pour grief into and never fill. It had been vaguely the same when his mother had died…you had to work through it. You lived with it, and forgot just a little the edge of loss. You didn't help yourself by sitting and brooding in the dark and going over might-have-been's till they ceased to even make sense.

His mother's death had never hurt this much. They had never been close enough for it to hurt. It had been more a loss of any chance to know her that he'd grieved over.

Yet…he couldn't seem to stop himself from dwelling on Rin. He was sure it had been years, had felt like eons he'd been here by now, and it hadn't stopped hurting any more than he'd stopped thinking about it.

It was obvious he'd die here himself soon. There had to be a rule of some kind….'If something sits in one place long enough, it is officially dead'. Well, he'd sat here in this room, in one spot, for long enough…he was getting sick of it.

He needed something to distract himself from her. It was unhealthy to brood as long as he had…he didn't care if he did brood or not. It was hard to remember a time when he'd really cared about doing or not doing anything, by now.

No one would save him. He didn't give a damn if they did or not. He just wanted somewhere that wasn't grey…that wasn't always the same…that wasn't some forsaken little hole in the wall…that would let him either escape or die. He almost wished Damia had managed to kill him, however long ago it had been. He didn't know. He didn't really care.

Sesshoumaru knew he was being stupid, knew that he couldn't allow himself to sink to the depths like he was currently indulging in. How could one insignificant little human's loss send him reeling for balance like this? Why, after all this time, did he still dwell this much on her? Where had the cool indifference he'd once had gone?

She had melted it. He could see that now. It was all her fault, but he couldn't blame her. Anything she'd ever done to rub his nose the wrong way could be forgiven. She was his little girl, and could do no wrong. Imagine that. One of the most feared lords of the age, wrapped around a tiny little human's hand….

He wondered what his court would have said if they'd ever found out about the time he'd let her braid flowers in his hair. It had been worth it for the smiles. He hated to think what they would have thought of him, pink and yellow blooms messily wound into his silver hair. Oh, the gossip….

Pathetic….but he didn't care. The pain might be as fresh as the day he'd come home to find her dead, but the rest of his rage had faded, too tired to do anything but flicker and go out. All the anger of being imprisoned, all the barely contained wrath, and dreams of revenge, had died. He didn't know how long it had taken for the rage to die, but by now it had. He was too tired to do anything by exist, as time washed over him, washed him away bit by bit, while he watched, helpless to stop it.

He couldn't forget, but the revenge had wavered and gone out, leaving him alone with the pain of losing her, and the numb physical feelings that came from being without food for far too long. Much longer, and he'd feel nothing at all but the quite darkness of death.

He wished he could sleep. It would have been an escape from this bleak little forgotten corner of the universe. Sometimes he faded into the black world of unconsciousness, but it was never real sleep. He hadn't dreamed in so long…

He wondered if there were people around of any sort, or if he'd been completely forgotten. He might have had visitors while he'd been unconscious ….or not.

He might truly have been forgotten long ago for all he knew. He'd become accustomed to solitude early in his life, and it had never left him. In the long years before he'd come across Rin, and realized there was more to life than power, he'd wandered completely on his own, save for when Jaken joined him.

Power…it seemed so hollow now. Even his father's sword wouldn't help him bring back Rin from death any more than revenge would. It was all hollow. He was someone who existed for vague goals, no more. A shell, a dead statue of dust, mind trapped as well as his body had ever been.

The life he'd had before was full compared to what he lived now. At least Rin had begun to fill some long unthought of void.

Sitting and plotting revenge had been not a bad way to pass the time at first…but now…

It was slightly better than watching the wall for hours, at any rate. Sesshoumaru was quite sure there was something wrong with that thought, but without having anyone there to measure against, he couldn't know if he was crazy or not. He doubted anyone could find him to comment, so it didn't really matter now. Locked up, and they key long since dust.

Insomnia did strange things to the mind, after all. He knew that, having walked a fine line between the need for sleep, and the need to stay awake many times while on his own. He knew he was likely to start making mistakes in perception after who knew how long of forced awareness. It was quite impossible to know how long he'd been here, and thus how long he'd been in this waking hell, except by reasoning. He rather thought it had been a while because of how loud his stomach was protesting the lack of food in it.

He briefly wished he'd counted the sun's trips across the dirty grey slats of the floor, so that he'd have some idea of how long he'd been locked away. Not that it would have done him much good. The previous room he'd been incarcerated in hadn't had windows, or the one before. Besides…..who knew how long he stayed unconscious now?

Black…nothing but black…and before that, more grey…Before that even…his mind shut down, unable to think of it. Sesshoumaru clamped down before the thoughts even formed. He wasn't going to go there ever again. He didn't think he could stand it. Even the grey was better than…some things….

With no one but himself for company for (supposed) months on end, there was no way to tell if he was going crazy or not, or if it was just the occasional blackouts…(although they had seemed somewhat more frequent of late…)

It was an easy way to forget the loss of his freedom, his lands, 'life'…but not her. He didn't want to forget her, but at the same time…it would be so much easier.

He was sure mother's death had never been this bad. He'd never been close to her, or to his father. His nurse…well…he could hardly remember that one bit of kindness he'd had as a child. She'd only taken care of him for his first year, forgotten but for a soft touch and a lullaby.

Maybe that was why he'd taken Rin in…he had never been allowed to be a child.

He hadn't even told Jaken; much less the rest of his household, where he was or when he would be returning the day he'd gone out. To the field he'd gone to with her to pick flowers in. He hoped Rin would like the blooms he'd left by her grave for her. Jaken wouldn't find him, much less in time to be of help.

After all…the one person, who had truly cared about him, and not just because of his title, was dead. He'd wanted to bury her alone.

Alone…always alone…..

He wouldn't have cared, once. Yet, by now it was obvious he wouldn't get out of this one on his own. He'd been here for what seemed years. Judging by the state of his body and stomach, a long time had passed.

Perhaps that was why it was so difficult to wake from the blackness that would sometimes crowd his vision, drowning the dust until there was nothing. He wondered briefly why he still even bothered fighting against the apathy.

Oh yes…revenge, wasn't it? It was barely a word, at this point. A word he doggedly held on to, though it had scarcely any meaning left…

Something to think about besides Rin, or the loss of freedom. Yet somehow, it always came back to her. Revenge for her…

He owed Rin that much, but Sesshoumaru was honest enough to admit to himself that any revenge would be for himself. She hadn't been much for fighting. She'd loved the simple joys of building a daisy chain, or uprooting an entire garden…his _private_ garden, no less…to make a bouquet. She'd hated the few times the violence of his own life had bleed through into hers, however hard he'd tried to keep her uninvolved. She would probably have been indifferent to revenge for her sake. But he felt he needed to, if not for her then for himself. If he got out.

She had had the same violence in her life before following him, having watched her family killed. He knew what it was like. He'd wanted her to be free of that.

He'd considered leaving her behind, once it became obvious he would be unable to keep her neutral. He should have left her with a family, some little village where she could have grown up and forgotten all about him. She had been young. She would have adapted, and gotten over whatever caused her to follow behind him. Whatever he would have felt at loosing her wouldn't have been as bad as this. It wasn't like he couldn't have visited…there had been that little out of the way village at the foot of the mountain…

She hadn't wanted to go the one time it had been brought up. She had latched onto his tail, and refused to let go. He couldn't say no to her. Truth be told, he had been secretly glad she'd wanted to stay with him. But…

She could have lived there. If he'd been smart enough to know he couldn't protect her forever, he could have left her there to grow up, despite the protests. He'd have gone back to his own meandering life, and eventually, it would be the same as it had always been. A pointless existence, interspersed with trips across the Western lands. She wouldn't have died….he could have done something. Should have, would have….useless, now.

The dead cared nothing for the livings' affairs. Funerals, vendetta's, honor…those were the domain of the living. If he ever had the chance to revenge her death, it would solve nothing. She wasn't coming back.

Tenseiga only worked once, after all. If it had, maybe…maybe she would be here now…probably scolding him for wallowing in self-pity, too…

He'd tried to stop the cycles of mourning, and rage…and the rage had stopped, gone out in the face of the grayness. But he couldn't make himself stop thinking, and brooding…what did it matter…?

Eyes still staring at the same, dull point on the wall Sesshoumaru frowned to himself. The question of whether or not he would ever be able to avenge her was raised, then answered.

No. He would die.

An ending of some sort…

…as long as it was an ending, he didn't care.

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_  
There. Fin first chapter/prologue thingy. I know what I did to Rin was rather horrible (Hated doing it, but needed to for this story. Unfortunately) Hopefully, some people are interested in the story, and stick around to see the next chapter, probably up in a week. _

_Please come visit my website….the link is posted on my authors profile. There's more of this story, as well as a whole lot more!_


	2. ch 1 : I'm Sorry

**: I'm Sorry :**

Light drifted low along the ground, leaving a wake of slithering shadows that changed as quickly as the wind blew. It was slightly cool, with that fresh smell peculiar to spring permeating the air. The park Kagome and Hojo were walking in, a two hour drive from Tokyo's city limits, was starting to awaken for summer. It was a rather pretty park. Some company…Hantsuki Inc, or some such, had donated it a while back to Tokyo.

If one didn't know better, they would have felt themselves lost in paradise…providing they were unobservant enough not to see the small signs of nearby habitation, and the plastic leavings of tourists.

Kagome walked leisurely along the cool mountain trail. She and Hojo had left the city for this little known park, with its miles of trails and small amounts of wildlife. She was in no hurry, enjoying the false sense of being in the feudal era. She smiled sadly. That was gone now…or as good as. It was almost a year ago she'd sealed the well herself, in a moment of madness. She couldn't remember what she'd been thinking then…she questioned whether she _had_ been thinking. That had been the night, the day it all changed…the day he died, the day she cut herself off from the feudal era…

Thinking about it later, she'd come to the cynical conclusion that she'd sealed the past away, in the hope of sealing the pain away. It hadn't worked, of course. Pain didn't stay behind, but traveled with you, and it had been the more bitter for her self imposed isolation.

The headaches she'd gotten trying to get back…all it took was a minute's work from a wannabe miko who didn't know what she was doing, and she'd cut herself off.

So much could change in a day. All it took was a single misstep, or the smallest touch of chance…and it had ended. His life had ended. Her double existence had ended. Her home was gone.

She resolutely closed her mind to the images that stirred. She wouldn't let that particular nightmare out now. She couldn't stop it in her dreams, but here, in the shaded sunlight of the forest…she wouldn't let it have its way.

Hojo walked beside her, and she glanced at him. After she had sealed the well, he'd asked her out, and she, wanting to make someone happy, had done it. It was one way to forget _him_…she'd always felt guilty, as though she was somehow betraying his memory. Yet…it had been his choice…his choice to die…

She regretted it now. Hojo might be in love with her, and perfectly happy with the way things had gone, but she wasn't. He was a good friend, but nothing more than that. She sighed. Perhaps that was why she'd buried herself so deeply in both school and in learning to be a miko. As she grew more disenchanted, she distanced herself even more, starting to take an after school martial arts course, in that hope that, one day, she could use it. She was learning, slowly.

Yuka, Eri, and Ayumi she had kept in touch with, but…they just didn't seem to connect the way they once had. The rest of her life from before the time leap had vanished. She often regretted having left her social life on this side of the well alone for so long, but even now her plans to go back just didn't leave room for reinventing a modern life.

She'd decided once, that she would stay with Inuyasha. It wouldn't happen now, but she still wanted to stay in the place she felt the most alive, the feudal era. Modern Tokyo, for all of its wonderful inventions such as indoor plumbing, just didn't feel right. She'd somehow lost her sense of it as home. Not that she wouldn't have visited. Her family was here, and she could never forget them for a minute…but she wanted to live in the past.

His world had become her home in a way her family's shrine never had, and she missed it terribly. She'd searched for any way to learn enough of her own powers to break the seal on the well but so far hadn't managed to. So she had searched the library, her family's own collection of scrolls, anything she could find, on legends.

She'd hoped to find a clue that would help her develop her powers on her own, enough to go back. She'd found out a great deal, most of it wrong, but nothing of much value. The archery practice and learning to become more acute at sensing things using her power were things she could, and did, work on, but so far that was most of what she'd done. Fine tune what she already knew.

It would have been so much easier if she wasn't fumbling in the dark, or had more to go on than old dusty stories and gut instinct. Unfortunately, it was all she had.

Eventually she had thought of taking a course her grandfather had tried pressing her into a few years back. He'd wanted her to be a shrine maiden after him, but at the time, she'd refused. He'd been disappointed, and had never mentioned it again. Kagome had remembered that, and had eventually enrolled at the cultural center.

That course was one of the high points of her week, despite the fact she'd found it of little use in learning about miko power. She'd learned plenty about what a miko did in modern times, and had made a great friend in her classmate Chihero, but her constant questioning about legends, and the powers of miko, had given the other students the idea she was more than slightly odd.

Ah well. She didn't care if they thought her crazy for seeming to believe in such things as youkai, or oni….she'd have thought the same, and actually had thought the same, of her grandpa…in a nicer way of course. She had never taunted her grandfather the way the other girls had done to her.

Kagome broke free of her thoughts as a small, painful flicker of red crossed her senses. A feeling of pain, of a small, fading aura. She stopped, and bent down. There was something…something small and hurting beneath the bush on the side of the path. What was it? It felt like it was hurt quite badly…Kagome wasn't sure what she'd do, but she'd try and help it. Hojo continued a few steps and then stopped, turning to stare.

"What…?"

"Shhh….you'll scare it. Poor guy…" Kagome smiled at what was revealed to be a baby bird under the tree. It was too young to fly, and had been clawed by something, enough that it had almost lost a wing. She slowly extended a finger to it, trying to be calm, silently telling it she would try and help. She had no idea whether the bird would be reassured or not, but it was worth a shot. She had heard that extending your own aura to calm someone was used in healing, and that was certainly needed here…if she could do it. Kagome had never healed anything more than a scrape, and that more by accident than anything.

She remembered how she'd somehow...pushed…something over the nick on her finger, and concentrated. She'd done it without thinking then, now…she'd have to see if she could do it at will. She wanted to help the poor little bird. It was only as big as her pinkie, mostly peach baldness and damp down.

Kagome's fingers reached the bird, and she gently stroked its head. It stilled, and somehow, she knew it wouldn't run or start lashing out at her. She couldn't say how, but she knew. She carefully cupped it in velvet fingers, drawing it out from its hiding spot. Hojo watched curiously, interested to see what Kagome had found. Whatever it was, it was small.

He blinked as the bloody little bird came into view, clearly almost dead. What was she thinking? It was better to leave it there…it might have parasites! He was all too aware of what one could catch from stray animals, having enrolled in university as a medical student. He'd always been interested in medicine ….he'd spend a lot of his time in high school reading medical textbooks.

He'd started reading them as a way to look up cures for Kagome's many illnesses, but it had become more than that. Eventually, he'd discovered a wish to be a doctor

"Kagome….you don't know where it's been! And…it's got blood on it!" Hojo wrinkled his nose in distaste. He'd long ago learned his girlfriend would help anyone and anything, and he admired her for it…usually. That bird was a lost cause, and probably would lash out at her in pain. He was surprised it hadn't done so already. He crossed his arms, convinced he was right.

"There...there…I'll help you…you be a good boy, alright?" Kagome whispered softly, trying to soothe the shivering bit of fluff. Its eyes were glazed, and she could tell it was very weak. If she wanted to save it, or to at least try and save it, she would have to do so now. She hoped she could heal it. The last time she'd attempted healing, it hadn't worked.

Kagome desperately tried to remember what she'd done when she'd accidentally healed as a miko, ignoring Hojo's disapproving stare. She'd…pushed….hadn't she? But _how_ had she pushed…what had she pushed at the wound on her hand all those weeks ago? It had to be her miko power. She would have to find that first.

Kagome closed her eyes, hoping she was doing this right. If she wasn't…the poor bird wouldn't make it. She tried to see the power in her mind, tried to feel it…but it wasn't there. Where was it? Kagome searched, growing frustrated as it eluded her. It was just like the other time she'd failed! She couldn't find it! Then she took herself in hand firmly. She needed to be calm.

As though that was the key, her inner eyes flowed over to rest above her heart.

…There! Kagome could 'see' a glow. She pulled some of it out, and let it flow around the bloody wing, without thinking. She blinked, and smiled as flesh drew together under the blood on the skin.

She'd done most of it without thinking….perhaps thinking too much was bad? She'd done it all by feel before. Kagome stood up slowly, bird in hand, and frowned as she nearly staggered.

She hadn't been nearly this tired before….! It had to have been what she'd just done. Obviously, healing with spiritual power took a lot out of one. It had been worth it though. It was always worth it to help someone, or something, out.

"Poor guy. Where did you come from?" She turned to Hojo, who had an eyebrow raised.

"I don't know. It's lost an awful lot of blood though…" He stopped, taking a good look at the chick. "I could have _sworn_ that wing was clawed…" He looked around, but didn't see anywhere the bird could have come from. There were no other birds around. He wondered how it had gotten there. That wing…..it was …

"…Oh no…I don't know where the blood is from…" Kagome answered hesitantly. She'd not thought anything about what to say to Hojo. He wouldn't know anything about what she'd just managed to do. As far as he knew, it had either been magically healed, or not been injured in the first place. She smiled; it had been magically healed, hadn't it? Kagome wanted to cheer. She'd actually done it! She'd healed! It was something she'd read a lot about…but had never really done of her own accord before.

"I could have sworn…" Hojo muttered, and then shook his head. His eyes must have been wrong, because the bird was fine. It had sat up, and was cheeping loudly. The bloody wing was being waved wildly, and was clearly in perfect health.

Kagome smiled, and stroked the baby's head. "What to do with you…" She looked at her hand with its occupant, not sure what to do. She couldn't just let him go. He would get into trouble again on his own. She had to find the nest, or he'd be eaten by something else. And….now that she'd touched him, his parents might not take him back. She'd read that a lot of wild things wouldn't take back their own young, once handled too much by human hands.

Lovely. She'd saved, it, but she'd probably just insured it wouldn't be taken back…leaving her just the options of taking it home, or leaving it here, which wouldn't do at all….

The bird made up her mind for her, inching along her wrist and burrowing into her sleeve. Kagome held up her hand, watching as the bird poked its head back out and peeped. She laughed. "You can't come home with me! What would I do with you?"

The bird peeped again, and Kagome got the distinct feeling it wanted to stay in its new 'nest'. She sighed. "Ok, fine. You win." She searched around in her pocket for some clean Kleenex, and tried to clean the bird up a bit., and give him some sort of 'nesting' material.

"Cute little guy, under the blood. I wonder where he got it from…" Hojo smiled at the picture he saw.

"I….don't know…."

Hojo laughed as Kagome cradled her sleeve, and the bird inside. "Always picking up strays, aren't you?"

"Um…"

He laughed again, and put his arm around her shoulders. "Yes you are…that's what I love about you Kagome."

Kagome wished she could shrug off the offending arm and disappear. She hated it when he got like this. Lately, Hojo had wanted to 'go to the next level' as it were. She would have to tell him her own feelings soon. She didn't want to hurt him, but….there was no way she could let things get to that point. It would only mess them up even worse.

"Stop that….actually, I'd like to head back. I'm really tired for some reason." Kagome pushed him off, and he took his arm back without missing a beat.

"Sure."

Both turned around, and headed back to Hojo's car. He'd had his license since he was 19, and was now 20, a year older than her. Kagome looked down at the bird in her hands. He was cute, wasn't he…? She thought 'it' was a he. And 'he' would need a name.

What had she gotten into?

Kagome sighed, and smiled as her passenger burrowed into her clothes further, before going to sleep. It was so simple for him to forget everything, now that he was safe and warm. She'd have to feed him soon…once she discovered what he'd eat. Wouldn't do to let a cute little guy like him starve.

Both young adults came up to Hojo's somewhat battered vehicle, and got in. Hojo was always saying he'd buy a new car, but so far he hadn't. Ah well. This car had personality.

Hojo turned the key, silently wishing Kagome had never found the baby bird in the first place. Yes, it was cute, and yes, it wouldn't be able to survive on its own, especially now she'd been holding onto it…still...

She'd take anything in, even if it was a bad idea.

Hojo, in the course of learning to be a doctor, had come across some of the things you could catch from wild animals, and none of them were pretty. He wouldn't say anything to Kagome, but however worthy saving the little bird had been, it wasn't worth her going into another round of sicknesses like she had come out of a year ago. He didn't want that to happen to his Kagome again.

Kagome crossed her arms, staring blankly at the minute bulge in her sweater sleeve. She could feel the warm weight of the bird as he was snoozing. She sat back with a sigh.

She wondered what Yuka, Eri, and Ayumi would think of her new friend. Hojo would be sure to tell them at some point. He had stayed in touch with a lot more people from their old school than she herself had. She'd somehow drifted away from her friends in the years she'd traveled with Inuyasha, and the year since.

They were as unable to understand her quiet obsession with the past as she was unable to understand their preoccupation with the small things in life. They were quite happy to go through school, talk of fashion and boys, discus what they wanted to do…they were normal, and happy so. She wasn't.

Even so, she wouldn't trade her life for theirs. She wouldn't have known the friends she'd made…and she wouldn't have met Inuyasha. She smiled sadly. He was the whole reason she was here with Hojo now.

Although…that wasn't really true. She was her own reason. She'd broken the Shikon in the first place, and unintentionally set in motion the events that eventually led to Naraku's downfall…and Inuyasha's own death.

Kagome stopped, looking at the waterfall seen through the trees. It would not have been out of place in the feudal era, apart from the few less obvious sign of human touch. Civilization would not be denied. She quickly started walking again, grateful once the parking lot came into view. All she wanted right now was to go home.

Kagome absently started thinking of all the things she'd need to do once she got back to Sunset Shrine. Find out what the little friend in her sleeve was, for starters, and then what he ate. 

She hoped it wouldn't be too hard to feed the little guy. Some birds could be picky apparently, and if this one was, it would be a lot more trouble to keep him happy and well fed.

Hojo casually put his arm around the seat next to her, and Kagome winced inside. She couldn't let him do this…. She made up her mind. She would stand on her own feet, alone. She would tell him what she felt, honestly. It might hurt him, and it would hurt her, but it had to be done. She couldn't allow him to keep thinking like this. She wouldn't let him be hurt worse. She couldn't heal a broken heart.

"Hojo, can we talk once we're back at my family's shrine? I've…I've wanted to talk for a little, but something always came up…and…"

"Of course." Hojo concentrated on his driving all the way back to Tokyo. Kagome watched as they went by the new antiques store opening a few blocks from her house. She wondered what kinds of things it had in it. Scrolls, perhaps, or rusted katanas. Hojo brought them around the corner, before pulling up in front of the long flight of stairs. He hopped out, and Kagome carefully got out behind him with her passenger.

"I'm going to just wash him first though…he doesn't need all that blood on him. I'm sure he'd appreciate being clean." Hojo nodded, and went to dealt with parking his rusty vehicle. Kagome climbed up to the house, and went straight to the bathroom. She leaned against the counter, running warm water for the bird, getting the softest towel from the pile of clean laundry.

She watched as he splashed happily in the shallow bit of water, clearly enjoying himself. Kagome smiled, and when the water started to cool, and the bird to splash less, she carefully picked him up and started drying him off. Hojo finally arrived, and watched the entire performance from the bathroom door, wry smile on his face.

"Guess I'll have to be more like you when it comes to patients…." He joked "I'm a little nervous about getting my hands bloody. All that responsibility too…sometimes it scares me."

Kagome stopped, and sighed. He had no way of knowing how many times her first aid kit had been used in the years with Inuyasha…or the times she'd not known what to do. That last time…no! She wouldn't see it, wouldn't remember holding him…

"I'm sure you'll make a great doctor Hojo. Look what you did for me." Kagome smiled "Hey! Did I tell you about that job? I got in yesterday…the museum phoned, and said they'd take me as an intern!"

"That's great Kagome! When does that start?" Hojo beamed at her and the bird. She'd been hoping she'd get that job ever since she'd first applied. He had no idea why she was so fascinated with anything older than four hundred years, but she'd enjoy the job at least. He might find it boring, but Kagome would be in seventh heaven.

Kagome wrapped the tired little bird in the towel, and went to the living room with him. "Next Monday is my first day. I think they'll have to do some training with me first though, so I know the system in storage…a whole lot of stuff. Chihero is going to get me oriented. She's worked there for a month now, and she was an intern at one point last year too…actually, I learned about this from her in the first place."

Kagome's smile grew sad. Chihero had no idea how much Kagome had wanted the job. It was meeting her, and getting to know more about both her and the museum, that had shown Kagome the possibilities an intern would have to look at old scrolls. Kagome would be able to see things, read things, from over 600 years ago. One of them had to have a clue to breaking a barrier in it.

Kagome arrived in the living room, and pushed the past from her mind. She needed to concentrate on the present for now.

She sat down on the couch, and turned with dread to face Hojo as he sat down beside her. For a long time now, she'd seen that their relationship wouldn't work forever, and she had decided she had to end it. That had been months ago, and by now it was obvious to her it couldn't last. She'd waited, hoping for a good time, a good place to do this, but it wasn't going to happen. She'd _make_ her own time and place. The events on the trail and in the car, only served to highlight what would happen if she let it things stay the way they were.

She had thought at one point, that if she could just learn to like Hojo as more than a friend, it would all work out. So far, nothing like that had happened and probably wouldn't. Kagome sat straighter. She'd put this off for far too long. She had to do this now, before it got any worse…why was she scared of saying one simple sentence? She'd faced down demons, had devastated entire battlefields with her purifying arrows…why was saying this so difficult?

She didn't know, but she'd do it. She just hoped Hojo would understand. Perhaps they could stay friends. She did like him after all, just…didn't want a relationship with him. Definitely not a physical one.

She hoped it would work now she was telling him, since she'd never had to do this before. She wasn't quite sure how to agree to be friends only, in a way that wouldn't hurt him too badly. That was the last thing she wanted to have happen.

Hojo watched as Kagome fidgeted with the sparrow's towel. She hadn't seemed all that well lately. She'd been a little distant with everyone and a bit more downcast than usual, tired too. He worried about her, and wondered briefly if a job was really the best thing right now. Of course…it was her decision, and he'd not say anything about it.

"I…I'm not sure where to start…please just let me talk, ok?" she said softly. Hojo nodded. Whatever it was, it was important to her.

"I…well…we've been going out for almost a year…but…this…isn't really working. You're a great friend Hojo, and I don't want to lose that friendship, but…this isn't working. You're one of my best friends, and…I just…" She trailed off, unsure as to what she should say.

Hojo sat and looked at the floor, in absolute shock. He'd never known Kagome wasn't happy…she'd been a bit odd lately, but…he'd never guessed something like this would happen! He didn't know what to say to that. When had she gotten so good at acting? He'd had no clue…this was unreal. A dream happening to someone else. She couldn't just…say that…there had to be a reason…was he going too fast? He'd wanted a bit more for a while now, but so far she'd put him off. Did this have anything to do with that?

"Kagome…if…if that's the way you really feel…Is this because of me asking you to stay the night last week? I do love you…nothing will change that…"

"Please Hojo, don't make this any harder for me." Kagome watched him through over-bright eyes. "I hate doing this…I wish there was another way. I thought…maybe….it would work if I just gave it time, but…it isn't."

"I can make it work! We don't need to have sex if you're not ready you know…" He hoped it was just that…

"No, Hojo, this isn't about that. I…I…when you asked me out, that first time…I was hoping I could make it work. I was hoping you and I would be able to make it work, that I'd be able to love you the way I loved him…but…this…I gave it time, and you…you're my best friend Hojo. I'm sorry, but I can't let this keep going on…I hate this….I hate living lies…and that's what it would be."

Hojo sat back, still in shock. It wasn't real. It had never been real. It was a lie.

Kagome swallowed "I know you love me, and this isn't your fault. I…just can't forget, and pretend anymore. I don't want to act anymore. You're my best friend…nothing more…or less"

"Kagome…" Hojo was still in shock. She didn't love him, after all this…? She'd been _acting_…it had all been a lie…no.

She said she'd tried…he couldn't fault her. If she'd been playing a game since the beginning…but no…it wasn't a game. Kagome wouldn't do that. She wouldn't have played him for a fool. She was telling the truth. She really had tried to make things work, ever since day one, but if that hadn't happened after all this time…She was telling him the truth the way she saw it.

And she was right. This wouldn't work forever, if that was how she truly did feel.

Hojo blinked back the tears in his eyes. He loved her…and it was almost unbearable to know she didn't return that. He'd been so happy, the day she said she'd go out with him. He blinked again furiously. He wasn't about to cry, despite the fact his heart was being torn up, however kindly.

"Him?"

Kagome stiffened. Shit. Had she said that part aloud? There were times when you learned to love someone, but…not this time. But something she'd mentioned bothered him…'the way I loved him', that's what she'd said. Who…? "Him?"

Hojo peered warily at Kagome, .Who was 'he'? "You're talking about Inuyasha, aren't you? Eri said you were going out….but you broke up with him. Kagome…the guy dumped you. He was a two timer! He was violent. Why can't you forget about him?" Hojo's voice was slightly harsh, and Kagome sighed. She hadn't meant….gah! It was just a mess now. She'd have to see it through.

"You…wouldn't understand that. Please, can we not go there? This isn't about him…this is us. Here. Now. Not the past." _'Some past._' Kagome thought humorlessly. _'Some fairy tale I wandered into._' Fairy tales never had sad endings. The hero never died. He always won, and evil always paid….in stories. There were no stories where the hero died right alongside the villain. No stories where he and his first love died together. Except perhaps in the Brothers Grimm and the other, older fairy tales.

"All right. We'll not mention the two-timer. But…why now? Why just say this now? Surely there was a better time…" Hojo seethed. If the jerk she'd been dating before had anything to do with this…Hojo had never liked him before, and he liked him even less now. He would be quite happy to put his martial arts class to use on the guys sorry hide right now.

"I've been trying to say this for ages…but there was never time. I always told myself I could make it work, or I would lose my nerve. I just…today was it. I…" Kagome looked at the baby bird in her lap. There was a bird hand-book somewhere…she'd have to find it later. Kagome blinked, and brought her mind back from its wandering. She couldn't be thinking of that now. "This has nothing to do with Inuyasha, Hojo. I know you're probably thinking that, but it isn't."

Hojo gulped a little. He had been thinking that, hadn't he? Kagome wouldn't lie to him…would she? "I'm sorry…I still love you. Nothing you can say is going to change that. But if this isn't working out, then you're right. We can't sit and hope it will get better, because it won't. So…as much as I hate to say it…you're right. I don't want to hurt you." Hojo sighed. She must have been thinking about this for a long time.

There really was no point to saying 'Give it a chance, and we'll hope for the best.' If this wasn't enough time, then, it just wouldn't work out. He hated it, but there were no other options he could see that might work. Hojo had reasoned his way past all that. There wasn't really anything they could do but be friends, if that was the way she felt. He didn't want to fight, and lose her a second way. If they started arguing, they would most likely not be able to even be friends. Of course, that might not work anyway…but he'd try it. If all he could have was Kagome's friendship, he'd have that at least.

Kagome wiped at her eyes, looking up at Hojo's worried face. "Neither do I…but…we'll still be friends, won't we?"

"Of course…you can count on that." Hojo gave Kagome a strained smile. If that really was how she felt, then he loved her enough to let her go. They would always be friends, he hoped. They could do the things friends did. Go to the pool with Eri, Ayumi, and Yuka. Laugh at the newest movie. Just…he sighed softly.

He could tell he wasn't going to sleep tonight at all.

Kagome reached over, and gave him one last hug, careful of the towel in her lap. "I'm so sorry Hojo….I wish it could work. You're a great guy. But…" She sighed into his shoulder, and let go.

Hojo sat still for a moment. "I guess the party on Wednesday with Ayumi, Eri, and Yuka is out?" He understood. He didn't like it, but he understood why in his head, if not his heart. He hoped he could let it go, so that they could still be friends and not brood over the fact he'd been dumped, however nicely.

"Um….that wasn't really a date, just the two of us. We're still friends….we can both go to that. They'll no doubt know by then anyway….and I haven't been swimming in ages. I think…we could go." Kagome offered tentatively. She'd forgotten about that till he mentioned it. She hadn't seen those three in forever. MSN was great, but it wasn't laughing, or swimming.

That reminded her…she needed a swimsuit. She'd left her old one in feudal Japan. She hadn't gone swimming since then, and so the issue had never come up…

"Ok….We'll still be friends. Promise?"

"I promise." Kagome smiled tiredly.

Hojo got up, and turned towards the door, shell-shocked expression still on his face. He knew the truth hadn't really sunk in yet, and when it did, that he'd be crying. He wanted to go home. He wouldn't let her see him get upset. "I …think I need to be going. I've got an exam tomorrow morning that I need to go over my notes for…good luck with the job, ok?"

Kagome stood up, and walked with him to the door. She was glad it was over…it could have been a lot worse. Hojo was reasonable…she could tell he was a little dazed, and hurt, and she wondered if it had really sunk in that they had split. It could have been a lot worse. When he'd mentioned Inuyasha…they could have just started fighting over that, over why she was doing this…but he trusted her enough to let her go. Kagome kept her pasty smile till he left, then went back to the living room.

She sat down with her towel, and cried. It wasn't like last time…the only other time she'd broken up…if you could even call it that…

She remembered holding him close, just holding him, not wanting to let go, not caring about the bloody mess, not caring about the danger, not caring about anything but him. Just Inuyasha.

But he didn't care enough to live. He wouldn't live for her. He'd died for her previous incarnation.

At that point, Kikyou was dead. Not an animated clay corpse, but a shattered ruin. He was dying…she could have saved him…but he hadn't wanted to be saved…he'd wanted to die, so he could be with Kikyou again…

He'd saved her...he'd pushed her aside, almost losing his leg to Naraku…against her will, Kagome started to remember bits and pieces of that day.  
_  
Kagome watched the path of her arrow just long enough to know that Naraku was dead, along with Hakudoushi before rushing to get the first aid kit from her backpack_

She worried her lip. She had no idea what to do for such wounds. She forced herself to look. He still had spines inside him from where Naraku had driven his arm though his chest. He'd saved her by pushing her out of the way…but at what cost to himself?  
  
She knew he loved her. He had to. He'd said it. He couldn't have been telling her anything but the truth. She couldn't face not believing those three words.

I love you. "I love you…I love you…gods…I still love you…" Kagome put her head in her hands, shaking. She still loved him….

_Her heart was in her mouth. She'd glanced in Sango, Shippo and Miroku's direction long enough to see that they were all up and moving. They were fine. Whatever wounds they might have weren't bad enough that they couldn't walk._

"Don't…don't move" said Kagome shakily. There was blood everywhere. The leg Naraku had pierced was broken at a strange angle…it was almost completely ripped away. That could wait. It would have to.

She didn't want to look at his chest, didn't want to see it. Kagome delicately pulled away the ragged fire rat haori, wincing as he moaned.

"I'm sorry….but I have to see it. I have to heal it." She whispered, voice touching upon hysteria.  
  
If only she could have healed him. If only she'd known how right then. She could have tried, could have done something. She could have kept him with the living long enough to get him home to intensive care, and damn the consequences. If it kept him alive, it was worth it. Nearly anything was worth that.

But….all she could have done wouldn't mean a thing, if he wanted to die. If he decided death was the easy way out, the right way out…

_Sango and Miroku paused, a little ways off. They knew to give her room._

Miroku went in search of the Shikon jewel that had been lost in the fight. He found it fairly quickly, shining in the grass with malevolent power. He pushed it towards Kagome with a stick, not wanting to touch it.

Kagome saw Miroku coming from the corner of her eye, and nodded. Then she went back to Inuyasha, breaking out a wad of bandages. He'd already lost so much blood…

"Don't…I'm…not…going to make it…don't…waste your time…" Inuyasha gasped out wetly He coughed, and red spittle appeared on his lips.

Kagome saw the blood, and clenched her fists. He must have had a lung pierced…he might drown.

If only the feudal era had ambulances!

"You…have the Shikon now…you did it...but…don't waste your wish…on me…I don't deserve…" He sighed.  
  
How could he not think he was worth it? He was! He was worth ever bit of effort. He meant something. A great deal of something. Didn't he believe that, when she told him? He couldn't think…that he was worthless….he wasn't…

_"Don't say that. You're going to live, and get better!" Kagome's eyes watered as she deftly wound bandages around him. He couldn't die! Kohaku was already dead, as was Kikyou. She had no idea where Kouga was, or Sesshoumaru. They'd both been searching for Naraku as well, but hadn't appeared for this battle. She hoped Kouga was ok. There'd been too much death as it was. The reapers toll didn't need to be added to._

Inuyasha's eyes closed. "Kagome…I…Kikyou…" He sighed, so softly Kagome could scarcely hear it, his chest falling slowly. She tightened her grip on his hand, careful of his wounds and watched his chest move fitfully.

Up. Down. Up. Down…down…down…oh gods, why wasn't he breathing?

Kagome sat, staring, uncomprehending. She clutched the bandaged in shaking hands.

This wasn't happening. It was impossible. How could someone, so vibrantly alive this morning, suddenly be a mangled, torn up corpse?

No! He wasn't dead! He wasn't!

Kagome didn't realize she had screamed it out till she felt Sango's warm hand on her shoulder.

"He can't be."  
  
"You can't be dead. You can't be dead, Inuyasha. I still…" Kagome sat on the couch, not seeing the walls of her house, but a long ago field, flowers stained red. A red haori…

He'd told her not to waste her wish…he'd wanted to stay dead. He'd wanted to go to Kikyou, even after all the promises they'd made, even after that one magical night at the movies…he'd insured she couldn't bring him back, since she'd be making a selfish wish once he'd said those few words.

She shook her head violently, driving away the memories. Perhaps there was no such thing as an unselfish wish. She had to let go, sometime…she never really had. Even after nearly a year, she hadn't really gotten over it. Perhaps it was due partly to her sealing of the well. She'd left as soon as they'd buried him, and had never let go, had time to make a clean break.

She pulled out the necklace she always wore, and grimaced at the Shikon. She hated the damn thing. It had cost so many people so much…but she was the guardian now, so she kept it close. It never came off her neck, even at bedtime. She wasn't sure what she'd do with it when she went swimming. Probably keep it on. She could say the clasp was broken and it wouldn't come off or something.

Kagome grimaced again. So many lies…what was one more?

The bird in her lap peeped at her, and nibbled on a finger. It was hungry. And it wanted food. Now!

Kagome looked down, and brought herself in hand firmly. She'd promised she and Hojo would be friends….she had a sparrow - she thought it was a sparrow at least - to deal with, and swimsuit shopping to attend to. She had to get ready for tomorrow, when her job would start. She had a whole life to deal with. She couldn't sit here thinking about Hojo…or him.

"Sh…we'll feed you. Just a minute…I need to get that book so I know what you are…" Kagome got up, and went in search of that handbook her family had. She'd seen it upstairs somewhere….she hunted around, passenger peeping the whole time, finally finding it in the bathroom.

She went down to the kitchen, and flipped through the pictures. Her bird was a baby…but he still had a few colors…finally she stopped at a picture labeled 'Sparrows'.

"You don't look like a plain old sparrow to me…." Kagome laughed. "You look more like a Shiro….I think I'll call you Shiro."

Shiro peeped louder. He wanted dinner.

Kagome smiled, and stroked his downy feathers. "All right, now we know what you are, I can give you something. We've got bread in the kitchen I can mash up for you in water, or I can try catching bugs…" Kagome made a face. She was not looking forwards to catching insects. Perhaps Souta could help her out there.

Kagome got up again, and went in search of mushy bread for Shiro. He was peeping still…she hoped he wouldn't wake her up in the night because he was hungry. She'd still love him of course…he was too cute for his own good, but she would be happier if he didn't wake her up at 1:00 am, right before she started on her new job. She dreaded showing up too tired to work on her first day.

Kagome set Shiro, and his nest of towels, down, and picked the bread off the shelf. She carefully tore it up, working it into a watery consistency for him. She hoped it would suit him. She finished, and brought both the bowl of mashed up food and sparrow up the stairs, to her room.

Kagome paused, looking at the mess covering her floor. Where to put him? Shiro couldn't fly, so if she put him in a box…no, that was no good. Buyo might get at him.

Wait…wasn't the cage Souta had kept his hamster in years ago still around? Kagome set the seeds down on her desk, and set down the bowl. Shiro was cheeping frantically, wanting food, and making it abundantly clear he wanted it now. She put carefully held a bit of the past she'd made on a fingertip, and held it in front of him. Would that be enough, or would he need help swallowing? He wobbled over and started eating, tickling the palm of her hand with his tiny beak. Kagome grinned slightly. Good. He could feed himself.

As soon as his minute but hearty appetite was sated, she picked him up and went to look for Souta's old hamster cage. He would be quite fine in that…her mom wouldn't have a problem with her new friend if he was fed, and housed, by the time she was home.

111111111111111

At five o'clock, the doorbell rang. Kagome left her room, and Shiro in his new home, greeting her mom at the door. She'd wiped away any remaining tears by now, but somehow, Mrs. Higurashi knew her daughter had been crying. Kagome looked far too worn, and though she had no tear streaks on her face, her eyes were still slightly red.

"Would you come help me with the groceries?" Her mom put down a bag. "Is Souta home yet?"

"No. He's still at his friend's house….probably too preoccupied with the playstation to notice the time." Kagome went out to the car to get bags of food. She carried them in, working silently alongside her mother till the car was empty. Souta really needed to get a life sometimes…

Her mom closed the door behind them, and started putting away groceries. She looked back at Kagome as she helped.

"Honey, what's happened? You look tired….and your eyes are red."

Kagome sighed. She should have known her mom would notice that little detail…

"I…broke up with Hojo. He…didn't take it too badly…but…it was still hard."

Mrs. Higurashi nodded in understanding. She'd known for a while her daughter wasn't happy with Hojo, even though he was a very nice boy. She had a feeling Kagome was still mourning Inuyasha. She'd heard some of what had happened almost a year ago. She knew there had been a battle, and while Kagome had won, and completed the Shikon no tama, Inuyasha had died in the process. She knew her daughter had sealed the well, and that she spent a great deal of her time trying to open it. She was quite sure there was far more than that to the story, but hadn't pressed the matter at the time.

For instance…where had her daughter picked up that huge slash in her arm? The battle, probably…Mrs. Higurashi had been kicking herself since then for letting her baby girl wander off into the feudal era, and straight into the middle of a feudal war. She'd never really realized till then that her daughter could have been killed just like poor Inuyasha had been.

She'd kept Kagome close to home for a few days after, and was privately glad the well had been closed. Kagome might be upset, and she did wish her luck in getting it back open…but Mrs. Higurashi wasn't entirely displeased it was closed.

Kagome had changed since then…going back to the feudal era never left her mind for long. She had hoped Hojo could've helped her daughter find a place here, and helped her to heal. Apparently he hadn't, and now she'd broken up with him. The past still called to her. It would always call, most likely.

"I'm…sorry to hear that. He was a good friend."

"Yes…a good _friend_." She would have to tell her mom about Shiro soon….she didn't want her going upstairs to discover him by herself.

"We're still friends. It could be worse…and…I've got a sparrow upstairs."

"That's goo…you what?" Kagome's mom blinked. He she heard that last part right?

"Yeah, I found him in the park outside the city this morning…he was injured, and I brought him home. He's sleeping now, but I fed him, and he's set up in the old hamster cage. Buyo won't be able to get at him there…I'll put him out of reach."

"I…see. Does your new pet have a name?"

"You're all right with him being here then?"

"Kagome…I trust you. You're 19, and even when you were younger, you were more mature than most of your friends. If you can take care of the sparrow, you can keep him. What's his name? Or her?"

"His name is Shiro…he's not very old. I healed him when I found him…Mom, I healed him! I was able to do that myself…something clawed his wing, but…I was actually able to heal him!"

"Really? That's wonderful….I think I'll have to go up and see him once we've dealt with these groceries."

Kagome smiled, and went back to putting away tins of tea. Her grandpa would be glad for these…he'd been complaining his special brand of tea was all out. Her mom hadn't taken her news all that badly…she seemed a little disappointed that she and Hojo had split, but she hadn't said anything more.

She hadn't said no to keeping Shiro either, so that was a good sign. Kagome smiled. Her mother hadn't really taken in the information about healing, and how much of an achievement that was for her. Her mother was quite firmly rooted in the present. She didn't look at old dusty legends, or hunt through the scrolls in the storage room at odd hours. Oh, she cleaned the shrine, and helped maintain some of it when her grandpa needed a hand, but she wasn't really drawn to the past the way Kagome and her grandpa were.

Mrs. Higurashi sat back with a sigh, putting the last of the food away. She was tired. She didn't really feel like doing anything more today, other than sitting down. She'd been running errands since this morning, and felt she deserved to rest a bit.

"Ah…now that's dealt with…lets go take a look at your little friend…he's in your room, right?"

"Yes. He's on my desk…he was asleep when I left him…he's so _cute_…I know you'll love him." Kagome smiled and laughed, leading the way up the stairs.

Both stepped inside Kagome's somewhat less than immaculate room. Kagome walked over a shirt without thinking, and went to her desk. She looked in on the nestling. He was sleeping, curled up in the towel. The towel was in the corner, and some crushed seeds were in a dish along with another dish of water for him when he woke up.

Kagome's mom put her face down next to her daughters, smiling as the scrawny little sparrow shifted position in his sleep. She laughed softly. "He _is_ cute…welcome to Sunset Shrine, Shiro."

Shiro paid absolutely no attention, and kept right on sleeping. Kagome stood up, and went downstairs. "My turn to cook tonight, so I'll go get started. I'm going to have to figure out what I'll need for tomorrow too."

"Oh, that's right…you have a job to get to tomorrow. Do you need me to drive you in the morning, or will you take the bus?"

"Mom, I've taken the bus to the museum many times. I took it to school, many times. I'll be fine." Kagome laughed. Sometimes, her mom was a little too overprotective of her…She was quite sure her mom had never really known the dangers of the feudal era, until she had come home after the battle with Naraku. Otherwise, she would never have allowed her to wander off there at all until she was eighteen at least. Perhaps not even then.

"All right, if you're sure…"

Kagome didn't hear, since she'd already started taking down dishes in the kitchen. She hoped Souta got home soon, so she wouldn't have to keep his dinner warm.

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"So you'll catch bugs for me then?"

"Yup!" Souta grinned. "I'll get all the bugs you could want!"

Kagome sighed. There. Now she didn't have to go crawling everywhere after insects. Souta could do it for her. "Thanks, Souta."

"No problem. You're working now, so you won't have time" Souta grinned and looked into the hamster house, grinning. "He's cute."

"I know." Kagome shooed Souta away from Shiro's house, smiling. "You've been watching him sleep for the past ten minutes…I need to get ready for bed. He's not going anywhere…"

"Fine…" Souta grinned as he went back to his own room. Kagome smiled at his retreating back, and closed the door. She looked in on Shiro, but he hadn't stirred. He'd been up again before, and she'd fed him again, so he should be fine for the night. Kagome stripped, and climbed into her PJ's. She made a brief attempt at moving the clothing piled on her bed to its proper place, but gave up as soon as a path from door to bed to desk was cleared.

"Hm. Not like anyone's going to be here to see it." The mess could wait. Kagome turned off the light and slipped under the covers, going to sleep almost immediately. She'd have to go bathing suit shopping after work tomorrow, for Wednesday…She had to get more seeds….she had to set her alarm….Kagome fell asleep almost as soon as she'd lain down.

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_There. Fin chapter one…Hopefully, despite never having broken up, I managed to pull writing this chapter off not too badly. Lol._

_I'm planning on updating every Wednesdayish, at least for the next few weeks. Comments welcome, of course. You're also welcome to step aside to my website, listed in my author's profile._


	3. ch 2 : Let Me Through

**: Let Me Through :**

Kagome walked up the path to the house nervously. It had been quite a while since she'd seen all the people coming to this party, and she wasn't sure what to say to some of them. That, and she'd been unable to buy anything but a two-piece swimsuit, exposing the odd scar on her side bequeathed by Mistress Centipede. She didn't feel like answering the questions she might get…or not. She could but hope.

Kagome pushed aside the gate to the backyard of Eri's house, smiling as a beach ball sailed over her head. No doubt someone had started a game of water polo…both Ayumi and Yuka were on the same water polo team, and it was something everyone liked.

"Hi Kagome!" Yuka came running after the ball. "Ready to help me beat Hojo and Eri? I'm losing the game…" Yuka smiled widely.

"Of course….just let me get dressed first! I wouldn't want to get my clothes wet." Kagome smiled back, and headed into the house. She set down her bag, and quickly changed in the bathroom. She looked nervously at the mirror. The bathing suit consisted of shorts and a top that came almost to the bottom of her rib cage.

She'd liked the pattern of this one especially, a black and red tie-dye. Even if it hadn't been in such nice colors, the only other swimming gear the store had had were in shades of brownish, disgusting yellow.

Why was it that almost every store she'd visited was out of swim suits? A number were been completely out of stock, and the others had had just remnants of what they ought to have had. Nothing really good in her size. Eventually she'd found one that with a few things left. The store had been short of one piece bathing suits, so it had been either a two piece, or a bikini. Kagome wasn't too fond of bikini's, so she'd gone for this. It wasn't bad, actually. She'd just rather have had a one piece suit.

Kagome smiled to herself. She wondered what had happened to her old suit in the feudal era. Perhaps some archeologist would find it one day and ask questions. Perhaps Sango had found it, and had held onto it. She'd promised to return home after all…maybe Sango and Miroku would still be there. Shippo…she missed him. She'd said she'd take care of him, and she hadn't…she hadn't meant to seal the well. She hoped he was ok…

Enough of this.

She'd better get out there and help Yuka, or there was a good chance the other girl would come in to get her. She'd go, and have fun. After working like she had earlier today and yesterday at the museum, a break was definitely in order. She didn't need to brood any more than she already did.

She grabbed her pants, stuffed them in the bag, flipped the bright red towel over her shoulder, and walked out onto the wooden deck. The wood was wet beneath her feet, and she smiled at all the splashing. Easy to see how all the water had migrated onto the deck the way Hojo was fighting for the ball…

She hoped this would be ok. It was a little soon…too soon? Would he really be fine, after she had told him how she felt? She hoped he would be. She didn't want a fight with him, much less one with Eri, Ayumi, and Yuka as spectators. Kagome frowned slightly. Where was Ayumi? She'd been late, so the other girl must just be later.

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Hojo paused as Kagome emerged, missing the ball and getting smacked on the head. He'd already told Eri and Ayumi about them breaking up, and no doubt Yuka knew by this time as well.

Why did she have to look so damn _good_ in her swimsuit? He frowned slightly, noticing something. Where had she gotten the scar on her side? It looked like a dog bite. A very large dog… He sighed. They'd never gone swimming together, had they? He wondered why not….then shook his head to clear it of fluff. That was over, so they wouldn't be going swimming together, just the two of them. They could have gone to the ocean…

Hojo smiled with an effort. "Hi! You and Yuka going to try and beat us?"

"Oh yeah! You're going down!" Yuka took a running jump at the pool, swamping the two people already in there with a wave of massive proportions. She popped up, and made a lunge at the ball. "Come on Kagome! We can take them!" She dodged Eri's grab for the ball, carrying it towards the net. Kagome jumped in behind her.

"Ayumi's not here yet then?"

"Hey, cool necklace Kagome," Eri called. "Where did you buy it? I'd love one like that."

"Somebody gave it to me." Kagome called back, watching as Yuka narrowly avoided Hojo. "Sorry."

"Nope. Called on her cellphone and…" Yuka started coughing "…damnit Hojo! **No dunking**!" Yuka took off after Hojo, wiping the water out of her face.

Hojo smiled from behind the ball, and took off for the other end of the pool.

Kagome smiled, and focused on the game. It was always good to see her friends again after such a long time. They had a way of cheering her up.

…Unless it was them causing her grief in the first place of course.

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Yuka sighed tiredly, grinning. "That was a good game guys. You almost beat us."

Ayumi pouted slightly. "Even with me on their team too…" She sighed dramatically, and then laughed. "It was a good game, though. Wish I'd gotten here sooner."

"Ah well. Maybe next time…" Hojo smiled.

"Who wants snacks? There's chips inside, and cookies. Moms got raspberry pocky too."

There was a mad dash for the glass enclosed deck, where the food had miraculously come through the wild game of water polo unscathed.

Kagome laid out her towel, and stretched out on the deck with a plate of snacks. "Why haven't we done this before now? I've missed seeing you guys for a while…"

"I don't know…I guess I just never thought of it." Eri paused, enjoying the hot sun. "You'll probably have less time now that you're working though, right?"

"Yeah."

Ayumi flipped on her side and propped her head up on an arm "I don't think you ever said what you were doing, did you? Where are you working?"

"I'm an intern at the museum…pretty good pay, and it's interesting. I might just do what Chihero did, and become a curator."

"Jeez…dusty bookworm…why not do something **fun,** Kagome? You live in the past too much already. Learning to be a miko for your shrine…actually, living at a shrine in general…"

"That's to help grandpa!" Kagome laughed "He'd never admit it to anyone, but taking care of the whole shrine the way he does, at his age…he just can't do it anymore. Stubborn old man that he is." Kagome smiled fondly. He was too pig headed for his own good. To even let her help him she'd had to tell him it was to learn more about her heritage. He'd given in willingly after that.

It was true though. She'd been able to help her grandpa out a lot, and had taken a great deal of the maintenance of the shrine into her own hands. It just wasn't right to sit and watch him strain while she could be helping.

"Still…I'd never do that. I'd rather be at the university, learning to be a teacher."

"True. You'd make a great teacher. You could even go to our old high school to work."

"Yeah. I loved that school…" Yuka sighed. So many good times spent there…

"You could teach water polo!" Hojo smiled and laughed along with everyone else. Poor students…Yuka with a water polo ball was scary. Very scary. To have her teaching you would be frightening…almost permanently traumatizing, in fact…

The rest of the afternoon passed quietly as the five lay in the sun tanning. They discussed what their future plans were, laughing together at times spent in high school, and what would come.

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At five, Hojo got up slowly. "It's been a great afternoon guys, but I have to get back home to start dinner. Talk to you later, ok?" He picked up his towel, and started looking for the bag with his clothes in it.

"Bye!"

"See ya!"

"Come back soon."

"We'll beat them at their own game next time!"

Hojo laughed, and disappeared into the house to get dressed. After all, it wouldn't do to arrive home just in swimming trunks.

As soon as he'd gone out the front door, the three girls rounded on Kagome.

"I heard you two broke up. Why?" asked Eri. "You seemed so happy together…"

"I…"

"You really hurt him you know." scolded Ayumi. "He never blamed you, and he didn't say what had happened other than you were still friends…what did you do?"

Kagome sighed, and looked at the deck floor. It was cedar. "We're still friends. We didn't fight. I've known for a while…almost since the beginning…that he was one of my best friends, but…I wasn't in love with him the way he was with me. If I let him keep thinking that, I'd be hurting him more than I already did."

"You weren't really in love with him? Sure fooled me."

Kagome's bangs fell in front of her eyes as her head tilted further down. "I just wanted to make someone happy…" she whispered, too low for them to hear. She'd felt guilty about dating Hojo from the start, feeling as though she was somehow betraying Inuyasha's memory. Besides that, she'd felt guilty for using Hojo to forget. Louder, she said "I hoped it would work if I gave it time…but it didn't."

"I see. This wouldn't have anything to do with Inuyasha would it? That's the other thing he said, that you knew you weren't in love because it wasn't like the way you felt about Inuyasha…something along those lines."

Kagome's head snapped up, and her eyes hardened. "He said that, did he? Inuyasha has nothing to do with this. I'm not going to see him again."

So Hojo hadn't really believed her when she'd said it had nothing to do with Inuyasha, had he?

It didn't, after all. Inuyasha might still haunt her sometimes…more than sometimes…but she wasn't about to break up with someone only to leap into another's arms. Even if Inuyasha had been around to leap at!

It had been a month after he'd died that she'd gone out with Hojo. She wasn't that kind of person, but apparently Hojo had doubted her word enough to share her little slip of the tongue with Eri and Yuka. Once those two knew, it was as good as telling the third member of the group, Ayumi. None of the three were much good at keeping secrets.

"So he's not back in town or something then?" Ayumi asked curiously. She'd thought it might have something to do with that, but Kagome had never seemed like that sort of person to her. She'd been wrong to think it was Inuyasha, then.

Unless Kagome was lying…but when was the last time she'd lied? Kagome was one of the most honest people she knew, and one of the most caring. She wouldn't set out to hurt someone, least of all Hojo.

"He's never going to be back in town, no." Kagome looked down again. So they thought she'd broken up with Hojo because Inuyasha had come back into her life? She'd told them all he'd gone back home. They still believed he lived in a different city, though she'd never said which one. They must have assumed he was back and she'd go running the moment he was within the city.

They weren't too far wrong either, which was what hurt the most. She knew he had chosen to die with Kikyou in his final moments. Had he had never really thought of her as more than a good friend?

Was she nothing but a sentient shard detector after all?

No. He wouldn't have cared as much about her then. He had cared. She was sure of that much.

It was clear to her now that he'd felt attracted to her more as a friend than anything else. At least at first. She had been sure at the end…the last year…If they had had time…they had gone to a movie once, and he'd taken her to see the sunset, the night before the battle. Just them and the dying sun.

If they had been given time together, alone…he might have been hers. It grated, loosing to a dead woman.

Kagome shook herself. It had never been a contest. Why was she thinking about loosing something she'd never had, and had never had any right to? That wasn't like her. She'd always put Kikyou ahead of herself, knowing he still loved her. She'd always stepped aside for her. She could have made sure she won the 'contest' more than once. She'd known she couldn't do that, and so she'd let him go, however it cost her personally.

It had been her school girl fantasy, to live with him in the past. Shippo, Inuyasha and herself as a family wouldn't have happened. She knew it with her head. Her heart…her heart said differently. It knew she would have come running the moment he appeared.

It hadn't been a fantasy to want to live in feudal Japan though. She really had wanted to do that. It was _home_…even without him. She was still going to go there to live…once the little problem of the barrier was solved.

She smiled. Of course she'd have gone running if he came back…he was dead. She'd want to see him alive again if for no other reason than that he was her friend. They'd had that if nothing else.

But…she'd been so sure…he'd promised once, that he would stay with her. That sunset…they'd said what they would do after the battle. She'd told him she was staying in the feudal era, and he had said he'd stay with her. They'd talked of a home with Shippo, talked of being together….

He had said he loved her.

He couldn't have been lying. She'd have known. He had to have loved her, somehow.

What if he'd just been sorry he'd let Kikyou down? He could have just said her name at the last because of that. What if he'd not decided to die to be with her at all?

She couldn't really believe that, much as she wanted to. The seeds of doubt planted by that one, final word, were sprouted. She hadn't yet been able to get rid of them. She really did wish she could believe he'd only said that because of guilt, but it was impossible for her. Her will wasn't strong enough. She wasn't strong enough.

Why had he chosen to die? She could have saved him if he hadn't told her not to waste a wish on the Shikon. Had he truly thought she shouldn't waste her wish on something 'worthless'? He couldn't have…he had never been worthless. He never would be.

"Um, Kagome? Kagooommeee…."Yuka snapped her fingers underneath Kagome's nose, and she blinked. She'd been thinking again…thinking along all the same paths, all the same possibilities she'd gone over many times before. It was a dead ended circle.

Kagome was somewhat disgusted with herself for allowing that to happen. She didn't need to go over everything again. It ended nowhere.

"Sorry…I was thinking…" Kagome winced. She'd not gotten lost like that for a long time…

"I see. Well, how about we don't think about Hojo now? It's already happened…and there's nothing we can do about it."

Kagome started for a minute, before realizing they thought she'd been thinking about Hojo.

"Hey Eri, wasn't there someone interested in Kagome where you work? You said he was 'pretty cute for a Wacdonalds employee' as I recall…"

Oh great…Yuka thought she could play matchmaker again. Kagome hated being pushed around like that. She'd put up with it at first, the times they'd pushed her into going places with Hojo, but now… "Yuka…" Kagome said slowly.

"Yes?"

"Stop trying to set me up. You kept doing it till I went out with Hojo. I don't need you arranging my life for me."

Yuka flushed slightly. Had she been that obvious? Drat. It would be a lot harder to set her up if Kagome was onto her…

"Fine." Yuka pouted "You're no fun."

"No. No I'm not."

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Kagome sighed as she fell back on her bed. It had been a good day, apart from the brief session with the Spanish Inquisition (which she hadn't expected) after Hojo left. She turned on her side, thinking back to some of the things said.

'_Who do they think I am? Do they think I'd play Hojo along like that for fun? I've been with him long enough to know I couldn't be happy with him. He might have been happy, but I wasn't. I'd never hurt Hojo. I'd **neve**r try and hurt any of my friends! Just who do they think I am?_

_I know they don't know everything…why don't I tell them? Why don't I just sit and tell them the whole story right now? It would make this so much easier…'_ Kagome looked at the ceiling, unblinking before answering herself dryly. _'Because they wouldn't believe me, that's why. If they don't believe me when I say why I've broken up with someone, if they don't trust me enough for the small things, how would they react to time travel?'_ she flipped back onto her front, unable to lie still.

'_Ayumi's a confirmed skeptic, and so is Yuka. Eri…she's prayed at the shrine a few times when she's been here, but I don't know if that's because she actually believes somewhat, or if it's out of habit. Hojo…he gave me amulets when I was 'sick.' He's also recommended a few home remedies. He might believe me too…_

…_Or they might all just agree I'm crazy, smile and nod, then phone the nuthouse.'_ Kagome laughed softly _'Wouldn't that just be awesome?'_

Kagome sighed, and sat up. Apart from that, today had been fun. She talked to her friends every week on MSN, but somehow that wasn't the same as having a face to face conversation. Certainly, you couldn't dunk people in the pool over the Internet. She'd had a lot of fun playing water polo. The scar on her side had never come up either. Kagome looked down at it. Perhaps she'd been worried over nothing. After 4 years, it was quite faded. The only other major scar was on her arm, but they already thought that was from running with scissors.

Funny how one could pass off a wound meant to be fatal as something gotten from falling on a pair of scissors. She'd said…what had been said? Something along the lines of 'running, tripping on Buyo, and going down the stairs head-first' according to her grandpa. He really did need to learn how to spin better stories…

It was positively sickening how many lies she'd told to her friends, or how many more of her grampa's she'd supported. She thought them up easily now, not having to think long before a ready story popped into her head. She wished she could just tell them the truth. And yet, she couldn't.

Kagome got off the bed, and walked over to where Shiro was stirring. He opened an eye, and then opened the other one. She smiled at him, and opened the gate to the hamster house. He peeped at her, and left his heated nest behind to wander over to the water dish.

Shiro slept a great deal, and she'd never had trouble with him. She'd asked her mom to watch him the first day she was at work, to feed him and see if he'd need anything else while she was gone, but apparently leaving him with water and a well heated house worked well enough now he was a bit older. She'd been worried he would need her and she wouldn't be there, but he'd shown he was fine for small periods of time by himself now. She still got Souta to watch him though, when he was around. It made her feel better.

Kagome idly ran her fingers through the seeds in the bag, choosing a few of the largest sunflower seeds and held them out in her hand for the little bird. He looked inquiringly at them; then started to eat. Kagome had to smile at the way he wrestled with the shells around them, pecking furiously. He'd finally graduated from mushy bugs and bread (for which she was glad. She didn't like mashing up bugs. At least Souta had helped her there) to the occasional seed.

Determined little guy. He didn't give up till he'd gotten to the meat, swallowing them in satisfaction. Kagome smiled sadly, and stroked his downy feathers. He was so soft…

He'd grown since she'd rescued him. He wasn't half bald anymore, for starters... he was at that scrawny age where feathers were starting to come in.

She wondered if she should try the well again. It had been almost 2 weeks since she'd last fought with it. Not since she'd healed Shiro at least. Perhaps since then, she would be better at getting through. Kagome hoped so. She really wanted to be able to go home again. She sometimes felt like an exile, cast out. Tokyo was wonderful, as was her family. Yet…the past was her home now, even though she'd not been there for most of a year.

Kagome stood up, resolved to try and break through again. Kagome carefully put Shiro back in his home, and stood up straight. Yes. She would go down there, and blast that barrier to hell.

She marched out of her room and back to the well-house, feet walking on automatic. She'd gone this way so many times…Kagome's hand reached up to the necklace with the Shikon on it, and held onto it tightly.

She'd always been afraid there would be more youkai on this side of the well like the Noh mask, youkai that might attack her family to get to her. She'd almost wanted them to come, crazy enough to want even that odd bit of connection to the past.

She'd started to think the Noh mask was an anomaly…she'd never felt anything else. Even youkai she'd known, like Shippo…he might have survived to this time. Kagome hoped she would one day walk into him, or Kouga. Anyone. But it had never happened.

Why not?

She refused to believe they were dead.

Even though a small, nagging voice whispered that that was probably why she'd never seen anyone, she refused to believe that she would never see them again, at least in this era. She was quite determined to see them in the feudal era again.

Kagome stopped in front of the sliding doors to the mini shrine, and gently pushed them to one side. She picked up her bow and arrows. She wanted to try sending a purifying arrow at the ward again.

There it was. The well…she smiled at it. There were so many memories in here. Fears and hesitations before taking the plunge into time, and the relief to have made it back. All locked away behind a barrier. Her face hardened.

Her family had always been so good about supporting her, even when she'd started to think more seriously about staying on the other side of the well. They'd always been there for her when she got home, waiting with a hot bath and food.

She loved them to pieces for it.

Hopefully she would get though. She readied her bow, and drew back an arrow, eyes narrowed ferociously. She prayed it would work this time, and wouldn't turn out like the other time she'd tried this…

"Here goes nothing…"Kagome whispered, and let the arrow fly at where she could feel the barrier hovering. The arrow shot forwards, slamming into thin air…and bounced off.

Kagome dived, hit the floor as it came right back at her, cursing.

Damn. It still did that. She set her bow aside, wishing that the arrow wouldn't skip off like that. She wasn't sure why it did that. It had almost hit her the first time her missile had rebounded. It meant she had to try things differently. The hard way.

Kagome sighed, and stepped into the well house. The moment she did, she could see the purple bubble swirling hypnotically within the well. She'd have to try putting her mind to work, try to break it down mentally, rather than with arrows. It really sucked. She had hardly any experience with that.

She wasn't sure how she'd created the barrier, or why it continued to resist all attempts to break it. It was as smooth as glass…smoother…and she could find no crack in its surface to pry at. Kagome opened her senses, and ran her mind along the outside of the bubble, the same as she had the last time.

Perhaps this time there would be some way to get inside…she hadn't tried to shoot at it so much after her first attempt sent the purifying arrow rocketing off the surface and around the well. She had managed to find a way to attack with mind alone. But she still kept trying the arrows, cautiously. Mind alone was _hell_ to do. So far, it hadn't worked either. Why had she been so stupid?

Damnit…she couldn't blame anyone but herself. What the hell had she been thinking? She'd been crazy…

Kagome sighed. What was done was done. She'd been hurt and not herself when she'd done the incredibly idiotic and sealed away her home. Now, she had to deal with it.

Kagome finished her run over of the barrier, and frowned. Nothing new since her last attempt. She'd have to try and smash it the hard way…_again_…

She hoped she'd have more success this time than on any of her previous attacks.

Kagome clenched her hands into fists, and imagined her power as a hammer. There weren't really words for what she was doing, but it was a lot like taking a mental sledgehammer and just hitting madly at the wall of the barrier. Not a lot of finesse.

Strike…strike…harder…invisible sparks danced in the air, mocking her. Kagome closed her eyes, and lost herself in the swing and fall of her mind against the adamantine of the well.

Harder…Harder…HARDER…

Kagome's eyes flew open, and she leaned back against the wall, gasping. It took so much _effort_ to do that. Gods, she was tired. She glared at the barrier. It wasn't any different from when she'd started.

Kagome glanced at her watch. She never knew till she was done how much time had passed. Sometimes only minutes. Once, a day. This time, only a little more than an hour. When you closed your eyes and blocked everything but the magic of the barrier, it was impossible to know what was going on in the real world. No doubt there were people who were talented enough to concentrate on both the barrier and their surroundings, but Kagome couldn't do that. Maybe if she got back, she'd be able to learn the proper way to do so.

When she got back. Not if. _When_.

She was never going to give up. She had friends…family almost, back there. Shippo would be missing his adoptive mother. She couldn't let them down. Even if Inuyasha was gone, there was a lot more in feudal Japan than him…although she wished he could be there too.

Kagome put a hand out to the rough wood of the door-frame, and pushed herself up off the floor.

'_When did I end up on the floor? I don't think I ever sat down…'_ Kagome frowned, then shrugged. Who cared? She was so tired by now that the only thing on her mind was getting up the stairs to her room…and falling on the bed…nice soft bed…

Kagome's face fell forwards onto her chest, and she jerked upright. She really did need to get to bed soon, or she might fall asleep in the well-house! Not fun. She could remember doing that once, and it wasn't an experience she wished to repeat in a hurry.

Kagome got up, and stretched out the kinks in her shoulders, wincing slightly as they sent needles into her bones.

She looked down. She'd gotten accustomed to defeat by now, though it hadn't stopped her. The first few times she'd failed, she had cried, screamed at the barrier even. It hadn't noticed. She'd gotten used to disappointment….too used to it, if you asked her.

But she had just tried to fix the problem, and hadn't changed it. Why was it so damnably hard to break through? She didn't understand it. She couldn't remember ever having this much trouble with any other barrier.

Kagome abruptly turned on her heel, and dragged herself off to bed and a shower. She wouldn't worry about it now…deal with it in the morning. Morning…oh crap. She had to work again. She nearly groaned at the thought of the supervisor's cheery smile as she handed out a stack of chores to do nearly as high as Kagome.

There really should be a law against morning people in the morning. Kagome had nothing against them in the afternoon. She just didn't like morning people at 5 am…or earlier.

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_Well, there be another installment to the story, as promised. Sesshoumaru shows up again soon by the way. Next chapter, I think, actually._

_Come visit my website, link located on author profile page, and my newly unveiled graphics site, in which there be wallpaper, and layouts, and a hell of a lot of art, at darkgardens dotcodotnr _

_Until next Wednesday!_

_---D.B Sidhe _


	4. ch 3 : Lost and Found

**: Lost and Found :**

Kagome smiled brightly as the supervisor handed her a clipboard. She could almost _feel_ the makeup over the bags on her eyes stretch as she beamed like a little ray of fake sunshine. At least they trusted her to do the job without supervision now, and they had for a week. So she needn't grin long, just for now. Then she'd disappear into the back rooms without having to pretend anymore…

She'd caught onto what she'd needed to do fairly quickly. She'd helped her grandpa with the shrine's upkeep after all, so some of this was old hat. She'd been cleaning and dusting collections until a few days ago, but today she'd get to do inventory, which was a _really_ good thing to have happen from her point of view.

She might come across something of use! Plus, if she did a good job with artifacts – what she was doing today – then they might 'promote' her to doing inventory on the older scrolls. Those needed careful tending, since they were so fragile, and a new intern wouldn't be allowed in the same room alone, normally.

And they might just have more information of use to her. If she could prove herself up to the task.

Kagome looked blankly at the inventory list. It had the oddest descriptions of items the museum owned, from 'a ball of clay leaves' to racks of swords dating to 700 years ago. She stepped into the first storage room, and grimaced. It looked like no one had set foot in here, much less attempted to organize, since the museum had been built. About 60 years ago, that had been.

Kagome silently cursed the previous year's interns for not doing a terribly good job, and rolled up her sleeves, sneezing on the dust that fell through the air like snow. Cleaning was never as much fun as doing something else. At least she wasn't being asked to deal with all the dust here, just take an inventory.

Yet. No doubt the dusting would come in due time…

Ah well. The rest of today hadn't been too bad, really. Kagome had started her job two weeks ago, and since then had managed to see a few ancient scrolls dealing with miko, one very old ofuda of the sort Miroku had once made, and innumerable pieces of armor with swords. All of it was interesting, and more than once she'd caught herself looking at something with a wave of nostalgia. She could remember Kaede using a basket like that, or Sango looking at that same piece of jewelry in amongst a rich man's treasures.

_That_ was the real reason she loved it here, whatever new information might come to hand.

Her search for a way to return to the feudal era had been going on for almost a year by now. She wouldn't believe it gone forever…she couldn't. Yet…she'd made hesitant plans, thought of what her future here might be like. It might be a very long time before she learned enough, or the barrier weakened enough, for her to go back.

Not that she was giving up. Not at all. That would _never_ happen. But she had to think how long it might be before she managed to break the seal. Once again, Kagome cursed the moment of insanity that had led to this mess in the first place. She could scarcely believe what an idiot she'd been.

Kagome checked off another item on inventory, and then stepped into the next aisle, frowning at the first thing that came into sight. It looked to be a statue, facing the wall. There was something, very weak, coming from the front of the carving. It almost felt like it was trying to hide any trace of its existence….but had broken down with the years, leaving a slow leak of power in the air for a young wannabe miko to find.

Kagome paused, and then walked over. The power came from a stone scroll on a necklace, carved into the statue. From what she could guess, it had to do with preserving the stone. Kagome smiled faintly. It hadn't done a terribly good job…you could barely see the samurai's armor.

Why was it so damaged? Maybe it had been put out on display…the list said it was only 450ish years old. It had to be acid rain that had run down the statue's face and ruined it. It seemed familiar somehow… perhaps because of the worn statues around her own home. She couldn't quite put her finger on why it seemed so familiar though…she'd come back after the rest of this room had been taken care of. If she hurried, there might be time to take a closer look.

Kagome checked off the 'Statue, origin unknown. Depicts what is believed to be a crouching samurai, drawing sword. Dated to aprox. 490 years old. 900 Kg, 1.56 m square base. 173 cm high.' off, and walked down the next isle.

She was sure that she'd seen that statue somewhere before…

Kagome looked briefly at her clipboard again. Hm. It didn't really tell her much about the statue, other than it was the right age. Who knew? Maybe she'd seen a similar statue in better repair while time traveling.

Kagome shrugged, and moved on. She had work to do, however fascinating dithering over inventory might be. She would be in serious trouble if she didn't finish this job by three thirty.

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Kagome finished with the rest of the collection she was taking care of for the day, and went back to stand briefly in front of the rain scarred stone of the statue. She couldn't stay long, since she still had to give the inventory to her supervisor, but she'd look for now. She was curious about what the scroll was there for. She tucked the clipboard under one arm, and squinted at the stone.

It was crouching, drawing one of the two katana's, and had something unidentifiable draped over an arm and a shoulder. Kagome blinked at it, and at the rough armor.

Something over a shoulder, and wound around an arm….where had she seen that before?

Her eyes widened a fraction as one image came to mind.

Sesshoumaru.

Yes, it did look like him….if one looked **very** closely. The stone was quite worn. But if you knew what he'd looked like, you could see him in the stance and the vague details left by the years. Kagome assumed that either the statue was made of quite soft stone, or that it had been outside for a long time at one point.

Sesshoumaru…who'd have thought she'd find a statue of him in some forgotten dusty storage room? The world never ceased to amaze. Although…Kagome wondered what the scroll engraved around the neck was for. It looked like some sort of preservation scroll, but for it to be still active, and the statue in such poor shape, led her to believe otherwise. What was that faint signature of power bleeding into the air supposed to signify? What was it for?

Kagome's watch beeped at her, and she scowled at it. If she didn't get her inventory in, she'd be on the 'wall of shame' for what seemed the millionth time this week.

She went back to what she was supposed to be doing, thinking hard. She didn't notice when she almost walked into someone, and didn't pay attention as she was handing in the list to the supervisor. It was the last thing she'd had to do, so Kagome slipped back to the storage room as the museum started to shut down for the night, after nabbing her coat.

She walked through the 'employees only' door, and into the back halls. There was something about that statue…why was it there? Whoever had done the carving had been a master. It looked so much like him…apart from the whole pitted, stony appearance. She was hungry for even this unlikely connection with home. It didn't _really_ look like him. If you looked closely though…

Kagome quietly pulled the door to storage room B open, and walked in, closing it gently behind her. She had come across items here that had power before. Swords, spelled for destruction, or a protection spell pasted into the inside of a samurai helmet. But she couldn't figure out what that one stone scroll was. She had never come across anything like it before that she could recall.

Not that that was saying much. She was by no means an expert on the different types of ofuda. That was what Miroku had been. _Was_. He might have died of old age in this time, but at home he'd still be alive.

Probably as much of a pervert as he'd ever been too, unless marriage to Sango had changed him. She wondered about them, how they were doing…had they really gotten married? He'd promised Sango, but she didn't know…

Kagome bent down in front of the sculpture, and stared at it for a moment. It was so worn by wind and rain it was almost impossible to tell what it had once been written on the scroll. Kagome reached out absently to trace the shadow of a raised line.

The stone shivered beneath her hand, and she frowned at it. What was going on? Stone did not shiver. Unless it was an earthquake. Kagome winced. That was the last thing she needed to have happen to her!

So slowly she didn't even notice, cracks radiated out from her finger, shattering the carved pendant with a sudden…**_smash_**!

Kagome blinked at the stone dust that was tinkling down the side of the statue, _'Uh oh, now what have I done? I only touched the damn thing! I didn't try to break it! Oh no…what am I supposed to say to the supervisor! That woman will kill me!_' An image of the ferocious supervisor trying to decapitate her with an antique katana flashed across her mind. The scary part was, _it might just happen_…

As soon as the stone of the scroll had disappeared, cracks ran down the statue, crawling up its face and hand, running down the sword.

"Ah…gack! Not you too…oh no…" Kagome said, backing away slowly. She'd only touched it! She hadn't meant to break it! She panicked, watching as the cracks grew over the whole sculpture. Any minute now it was just going to collapse into a pile of rubble…what had she done in a previous life to deserve this?

Ok…maybe she didn't want to know the answers to _that_ one…

Kagome covered her eyes, ears straining to hear. She couldn't watch this…she'd be fired…there went all her hopes of finding something on getting back home…

But there were no sounds of collapse. Kagome peeked between her hands, one eye opening in fascinated horror.

The cracks stayed in place, a spider's tracery of dull white over the entire figure, and then they broke away in pieces of fading dust, leaving a dim shimmer behind them. Kagome watched the glowing, crouching figure in the center of the room in horror. Power. She could feel it radiating from that shape, and she had an awful feeling of premonition. She shut her eyes, but it only seemed to make that familiar sensation stronger.

Shitshitshitshit…

Kagome slowly opened her eyes again, fully expecting to see Sesshoumaru crouched in the center of the room, probably waiting to kill anything that moved. She had woken something that ought not have been touched, she knew, and it was Sesshoumaru, waiting…he'd be angry, and he had a sword…she was _doomed_…

It was him all right, and she locked eyes with him for a second, before golden orbs rolled up in his head, and he collapsed on the floor.

Kagome stared at him blankly. There was Sesshoumaru. In the center of the room. Out cold.

Shit.

_What_ had she done to deserve this?

"What the hell am I supposed to do with you?" She demanded. Sesshoumaru didn't answer.

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_The room wasn't the same anymore…there was someone there. A cause for minor celebration, almost. Almost. He watched as the figure looked around at something behind his head. He tried to move to see what it was, and cursed tiredly as his head stayed in place._

_Still, it was some difference. He'd not seen a person, no matter that it was a human, in ages. Contrary to popular belief, he wasn't a human hater. They were simply beneath his notice. Usually. Rin…she was…had been…special. And right now, this human's antics were the only thing between him and insanity. Unless he was there already, in which case it didn't matter. Sesshoumaru's interest was piqued, slightly._

_She disappeared after wandering around behind him. He could hear the small shuffles of shoes, and paper, then the female vanished out the door. He could distantly hear the sound of the hinges protesting. He frowned inside. He should be able to hear a lot better than this…He pondered that briefly, then came back to the grey present as he heard her enter the room again after a time. She stood in front of him for a space, a small frown of concentration on her face, and then left as a beeping sound emanated from her hand. _

_Why did she look so familiar? He was sure he'd seen her somewhere before, which was odd. He didn't normally look at humans at all, except when they were an inconvenience that needed to be dealt with._

_Interesting thought. Where would he have seen her before, if his mind wasn't playing tricks? Sometimes it did. Perhaps it would able to distract him from his current situation for a while. Of course, that just brought said situation back to him. His stomach rattled against his backbone. Hungry. So very hungry…_

_Why did his mind never obey him? Self discipline was lacking…_

_The click of a door brought him back to the grey room, and the …third? Yes, third, entrance of the girl. She looked at him for a long while, and he wondered what was so fascinating about a lump of stone..._

…_or, no. She wasn't really looking at him. She was looking at his neck, at what was hanging there._

_His heart nearly froze. She was looking at the scroll…did that mean…surely not, it couldn't be possible…he watched in an agony of hope, something nearly forgotten since his incarceration, as her hand reached out. Was she going to let him go, break the scroll? Was it possible for him to be free, after all this time? Sesshoumaru watched the hand slowly reaching for the spell around his neck_

_He didn't know what it would be like to be free, after all this time. It would be…he could hardly imagine. It had been so long…he wanted it so much he could have broken down on the floor, and just luxuriated in **movement**…It was the strangest feeling in the world, after he had resigned himself to death. Hope…_

_Could it be real? He wanted it so much, it had to be real, but what if it wasn't? Was he dreaming? No, he couldn't sleep as a stone lump, he couldn't be dreaming. So perhaps he was dead. Or insane._

_Oh well…_

_He heard the girl's fingers run over the scroll, and he waited, at a fever pitch. This was it…unless…_

_If he had been breathing, he'd have stopped._

_Her fingers drew away. _

_Nothing._

_He could have cried._

_Disappointment, almost tangible it was so strong, washed over him, and he upbraided himself for daring to hope. Maybe it was someone from Damia, here to renew the spell on him for another hundred years. Or to take him to someplace else, to be kept alive and suffering. Perhaps as a statue on her lawn._

_Or worse._

_He would die before that happened. He couldn't take that again. Nevernevernever…_

_Pain brought him back from the brink, and his eyes widened …then widened further as that sank in. He'd felt pain distantly before, but never the way he should have. Everything had been muted, numbed after a while…he was **definitely **not numb now. Fire coursed though ever inch of his body…. His senses had come back with a jolt._

_His back hurt, and his legs….his stomach was distant agony on a leash…his eyes met the shocked blue ones not too far from his own, and then he dropped his gaze. Sesshoumaru winced inside as his muscles wilted, and he went sprawling on the floor. Freedom** hurt**…but…He began to drift away, happy as he had ever been, escaping the prison of his body once more. Black gushed out from the wooden boards to engulf him, and he let himself go gladly. _

_Sleep. Real sleep…_

_Perhaps he was dying, or dead, but…free… the wonder of that followed him into the dark, and he no longer cared._

_He was free._

_How strange_.

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Kagome cautiously walked up to the prone figure slumped bonelessly in the dust, and nudged the one hand with the toe of her shoe.

Nothing. He didn't suddenly leap up and whip out his sword. No death threats. His hand didn't even twitch.

Slightly bolder after that, Kagome looked more carefully, hiding her shock at his appearance. She had never seen him as less than immaculate…maybe a little bloody, but never the way he was now. Somehow, she'd expected a livelier youkai than the pitiful bundle of dusty white.

He looked…dead, almost. His cheeks were hollowed out, the pristine white of his clothing stained with age and dirt. Actually, now she looked, all the grit that had been on the statue was reflected in him. The silk of his clothing was even yellow in patches, as though it had seen every century that had passed since he'd become a statue.

It must have been a long time. 450 years at least, if the dating was to be believed. She'd have to see if he could remember when he'd been sealed.

She blinked in sympathy. He didn't look like a lord at all now…he looked far more like the survivor of an African famine, arm as skinny as a stick, hair stringy and dull. The fur on the fluffy…thing (she had never been quite sure what it was) was filthy, literally caked in dust.

What had he been trapped for? It seemed fair to say it wasn't by choice, not when he looked like that. What had happened? He had to know something about the past. Enemy or not, she would get him well. He wasn't anything like Naraku, whom she would never have helped. Someone who had taken in a little girl couldn't be all bad…

Kagome bent down in a crouch beside him, and absently moved lank bangs away from his face. She didn't know what had happened, and had only the vaguest notion of what to do, but she couldn't just leave him there. Pity colored her voice "What am I supposed to do with you? I can't leave you here…. I can't let you loose on unsuspecting Tokyo either…. I have to get you home." she whispered. How would she do that though? There wasn't an easy way to drag him out the front door…if she could even _manage_ to drag him. People would ask questions.

Near skeleton or not, the armor would make him heavy. Plus he was quite a bit taller than she was. That would make him awkward as well. Kagome's mind went to work on the problem, thinking fast. She had learned to think under pressure quickly or die, in the past. It was a skill she'd been glad to have acquired.

Of course…if she could wake him up…Kagome leaned over, and shook his shoulder hard. He didn't even twitch.

Kagome yelled as loud as she dared in his pointed ears, right and left. She nudged him with a foot. She even tugged on his hair, but he didn't move at all.

If he hadn't been breathing, very shallowly, she'd have said he was dead. Which would have been even worse…

Kagome sat back on her heels. Obviously, she couldn't get him to walk out. She would have to try and flip him over and haul him out…but how could she get him home? She took the bus! She couldn't take him on a bus!

Wait.

Interns were given keys for all of the doors, and there was a fire exit down the hall, by an alley. Maybe if she could drag him out there…Kagome fumbled for her cellphone. Her mom had lent it to her almost 6 months ago, but she rarely used it. If she could get her to come and park there…Kagome was sure that she could get him as far as the back way in, then home. Without any…questions. She crossed her fingers, and dialed.

"Hi." Kagome was proud there was no indication in her vice of how strained she was

"Kagome? Hi!" Souta said. Kagome could hear the beeps of his x-box going on in the background.

"Souta…can you please get mom? Tell her I need her help really badly right now…"

"Ok. She's in the kitchen…here." the phone changed hands. 'Says she needs help with something,' Kagome heard Souta say in the background.

"Hi Kagome…what's this about help?"

"Ahh…um…I'm not sure exactly what I did, but I've got Sesshoumaru beside me here, out cold…and I need to get him home without anyone seeing…. It was an accident! Honest!" Kagome said in a rush.

On the other end, her mom blinked. Who was Sesshoumaru…and why was he out cold? "I see…why call me, though? Wouldn't the hospital be better…?"

"**No.** Definitely no…um…oh dear…how to explain this…I found a statue."

"You found a statue. And?"

Souta fidgeted in the door to the kitchen. What was going on? From his point of view, it sounded like someone needed to go to the hospital, or something…but where did the statue fit in?

"I don't know what I did! One minute there was a statue that looked like him, the next Sesshoumaru's passed out on the floor. I don't want to have to tell people at the museum I accidentally did something to their precious feudal sculpture …oh…argh!" Kagome sighed. She wasn't panicked …much…but she wasn't looking forwards to having to tell people the statue was gone. Especially when it would be equally as hard to explain Sesshoumaru's sudden appearance.

Why did these things have to happen to her of all people? Why did the gods hate her?

"I…see. Where are you?"

"I'm in storage room B. You know that alleyway behind the museum?"

"Yes."

"That's where I'm going to come out with him. He hasn't woken up so far, so I'll probably have to drag him…. There's an emergency exit, and I'll wait for you there, ok?"

"All right. Try and wake him up. I'll be there in ten minutes with the car." Her mom's voice sounded clipped, terse. She wondered what her mom was thinking, now. It wasn't every family that got an unconscious youkai dropped on them. She supposed, all things considered, that her mom coped with sudden changes remarkably well. Good old mom…

Kagome closed the phone, slightly reassured that all had not come to an end. Her mom would be there in ten minutes, so that left her to get to the door with Sesshoumaru. She was lucky to have a mom like her, who would come and help even with something like this.

Kagome bit back a shaky laugh. Speaking of family…it was a good thing her grampa was out of town, or he'd be breaking out the ofudas.

Or, even worse, dusting off the medical textbook her mother had got him for his last birthday…

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Kagome's mom hung up. Why was it that her daughter seemed to be a positive _magnet_ for trouble? She wasn't sure exactly what was going on, but if she had to make a guess this Sesshoumaru would be one of the people she'd met in the feudal era. Time enough for details once she'd rescued her, since obviously phoning the hospital was out. She hoped the person in question was alright.

Sesshoumaru was this person's name, wasn't it? She hoped that not phoning the hospital was alright. What if he was hurt? In a coma? She steadied herself. The faster she got there, the faster they could do something.

She turned around to see Souta, who'd been listening the whole time. "Something's come up, and I have to go get Kagome and whoever this Sesshoumaru is. Be good, ok? I should be back soon. Or…oh, you could attempt to clear a space for Sesshoumaru up in Kagome's room, please?"

Souta mumbled an okay, and trailed after her on the way out the door. Who was Sesshoumaru? It sounded like a funny name…was he injured or something? He hoped his sister was ok. He worried about her sometimes.

Mrs. Higurashi walked down the hall, and locked the house behind her. The engine of the car started with a purr, and she was on her way.

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Kagome stared at the unconscious youkai sprawled inelegantly on the floor. She'd have to flip him on his back first, then drag him the way a fireman would. He was fairly large, even though he looked half starved.

Kagome hoped all the archery practice had improved her upper body strength, so she could deal with the armor and swords. They would be hard to drag along with him. She didn't dare take them off and leave them somewhere. Someone might see them and wonder.

She bent down beside Sesshoumaru. It ought to be easy to flip him on his back, since he was currently on his side. She pushed against his upper shoulder, and grinned in minor satisfaction as he flopped onto his back like a large, sleepy puppy. Even if the comparison here was completely inappropriate…

Now. To drag him out to the hall, and then to the alley. Simple…right?

Kagome shuffled over, and got a good grip under his one arm. The stump gave her a few moments trouble, but she eventually got a tentative grip, and started walking backwards towards the door of the storage room. She glanced around nervously, sure someone would descend on her any minute, screaming the alarm.

Once she'd crossed the room, she set him down gently on the floor, and pushed the door open. No one was in sight, probably because of the late hour. Not many people were ever in these storage rooms anyway, for which Kagome was very thankful. But she couldn't shake the feeling that the frightful Mrs. Furizin would swoop down and murder her on the spot. She was a scary woman, that supervisor.

Kagome pushed the door open the rest of the way, and resumed pulling Sesshoumaru towards the fire exit. She was starting to breathe heavily by the time she'd reached it. She wiped the sweat off her forehead, and blew through her cheeks, slightly winded.

"You're still pretty damn heavy, you know. Even though you look like a twig at the moment." Sesshoumaru didn't answer. She didn't really think he would.

Kagome propped her burden up against the wall with an effort, and went back to the storage room to lock the door. He might hope to pass as a person sitting against the wall, if anyone saw him. She doubted they'd be fooled, but it was better than leaving him on the floor. There was something wrong about that.

She came back and opened the fire exit, after de-arming the alarm with her key. She set herself to nervously watching the hands on her watch. Her mom should be here in a minute or two, since she'd phoned almost 8 minutes ago. She hoped she got there soon, and wasn't held up by traffic, or something…

She hoped no one would come and find her. Even leaned awkwardly against the wall, Sesshoumaru was very obviously not with it. He looked stoned, actually. Or dead. Neither one of those was a good way to look.

Kagome had to laugh nervously. Yes, he'd been stoned…_very _stoned…

She wondered why he'd passed out when she'd accidentally freed him. Where had he been? Sealing someone didn't do that. Sealing a person behind a scroll simply froze them in time, and they knew nothing, and changed not at all, between waking and the moment they were sealed.

Maybe he'd been in prison before someone sealed him up. Maybe it was just like that carbon freezing thing in the Star Wars movies she'd watched on TV a couple of weeks ago with Souta. Carbon sickness…or stone syndrome. Kagome's lip twitched. That had to be the worst joke she'd ever made.

It was as good an explanation as any, though…

After the minutes of nervous waiting. Kagome cautiously looked out the door to the alley, and sighed in relief as she saw her mom's car finally come into view.

She held the door open with her foot, and awkwardly pulled Sesshoumaru out, then re-armed the fire exit. Her mother hurried over to help, exclaiming softly over Sesshoumaru.

"Mom! I'm so glad you're here…I can't take him to the hospital…"

"You weren't too clear on that." Her mom helped settle the awkward form of Sesshoumaru in the car, frowning over the condition he was in. It didn't look like anything major had happened to him. No sword wounds, or bleeding, anyway. He just looked too worn out to stay awake. And he needed to eat a few square meals. She'd see to that. She'd have to make him her special curry…

Mrs. Higurashi frowned as she tried to get a hold of his left arm, and only got the sleeve. The man passed out in the back of the car certainly did look the worse for wear. Missing an arm, though that was an old injury, and with the skin stretched over his hollow cheeks. Interesting decorations on his face…and what was the fuzzy thing wrapped around his torso? Many questions for later were brewing in her brain.

Maybe he should go to the hospital after all. Kagome was a good nurse, but …. She sighed. He couldn't go to a hospital. There would be questions about him, and more when he woke up. She understood. It was just…

"Ah…" Kagome sat down beside Sesshoumaru, and leaned back with a sigh. "I was doing inventory, and found this statue with a scroll around its neck. I thought it looked a lot like Sesshoumaru, so then, after I was done, I went back…and…I don't know what I did, but when I touched the scroll, it…disintegrated…and he just kind of flopped over at my feet..."

"I see….one of the friends you made in the feudal era then?" Kagome's mom asked, frowning back at Sesshoumaru's lolling head. At least now she knew what had happened. Sort of. She'd like to know more about what was going on, though it was unlikely she'd get answers anytime soon. She started the engine, and carefully turned into the street. The vehicle bounced, and Sesshoumaru slumped bonelessly against the window, head bobbing as the vehicle ran over cracks in the pavement. Kagome winced, but couldn't quite manage to pull him back to a sitting position. She grimaced, and gave up. He could handle it…he wouldn't even know…

"Um…sorta..." Kagome decided she wouldn't mention the fact that the first time she'd met Sesshoumaru he'd tried to melt her into goo with the caustic poison in his hand. Moms being moms, she'd probably overreact and do something stupid. Like toss him out in the street. Kagome looked back at him, cheek bouncing against the window. He looked very worn…hardly in any shape to be out terrorizing Tokyo.

Of course…once he'd woken up was another story…

"So he was a statue, and I'm guessing you unsealed him…and you know him from the feudal era. We'll take care of him, then. It has to be confusing, waking up in a new world. And I know how much you want to go back. A friend from there might be good for you."

No matter that said friend turned up in the strangest place, under some sort of spell…

"I'm sure it will be. I'll have to show him a few things…and he would have to stay with us, wouldn't he? I don't know where else he could go."

Kagome wasn't sure how she'd deal with him. She had no idea how to make a subduing necklace such as the one Inuyasha had worn, and anyway, there had to be a better solution than that. She'd hated having to 'sit' poor Inuyasha. Except for the few times he'd really, really needed it. You just didn't subdue your friend like a pet…it was wrong…

Maybe she could try reasoning with Sesshoumaru…

She was jolted out of her thoughts when they pulled up in front of the house. She got out, and leaned on the door. Now what? The stairs to the shrine looked like they reached to the sky, higher and more menacing than any normal stairway.

Kagome looked over at her mom "Maybe if we each support a shoulder…?"

"That sounds like it'll work."

"Ok then. I'll take the left. It's trickier without an arm to work with."

"Ah…of course." Kagome's mom wondered briefly how the man in the back seat had ended up sans his left arm, and then focused on the task at hand.

Both women half lifted, half dragged Sesshoumaru out of the vehicle, and somehow got him up the stairs and into the house, supported awkwardly between them. Thankfully, there wasn't an audience to see them struggle though the front door. Equally thankfully, Sesshoumaru did not suddenly wake up. Kagome jerked her head in the direction of her room, and they maneuvered him in that general direction while Souta peered after them curiously.

His sister sure had interesting friends. Inuyasha had been awesome, and this guy looked a lot like him. Same hair, at any rate. And he had tattoos on his face! Souta missed Inuyasha a bit, but he'd hardly ever seen him. He had been nowhere near as affected by the news he'd died as Kagome had been. He still missed the hanyou though, and seeing someone who looked a lot like him had brought that to mind.

Upstairs, mother and daughter put Sesshoumaru on the bed, and then Kagome's mom left to put the car away.

Kagome watched as her mother left, then stared at her visitor and had to smile. She had never, ever, expected to see Sesshoumaru on her bed, long legs and feet dangling off the end. She did have the oddest luck…or not.

He would no doubt be a handful when he woke up. She'd have to explain where he was…and then try and explain how everything worked. Kagome snorted. First things first. What exactly was wrong with him apart from being in a dead faint and chronically undernourished? She'd not seen any indication of an injury.

It looked like he was just too worn out to wake up. She couldn't imagine what he'd been through to get to that point. Inuyasha was hardly ever tired, and healed wounds in days that would have taken her a year to recover from, if she recovered at all. Sesshoumaru was probably even better at healing, and most likely had more stamina. What could have happened to bring him to this state? Must have been pretty serious…

It had to have been before he'd been sealed. So far as she knew, once you were sealed, that was it. You didn't feel anything, didn't know anything, till you were brought out from under the spell. It was as though days, years, passed between one breath and the next, with no memory of between. Since a seal simply froze you in time, whatever had occurred couldn't have been during when he was ensorcelled. So what had happened before? Had he been in some sort of prison?

Wherever he'd been, it hadn't been kind to him. If it _had_ been something to do with the seal (_very_ unlikely), whoever had been in charge of it did one poor job. If they cared, of course. She had a feeling the person to blame didn't care if he lived or died. Probably, they'd prefer him dead, judging by his appearance.

Kagome sighed, and then decided to deal with the armor and swords. He wasn't going to need them any time soon, and he would probably hurt from sleeping in them when he woke up if she didn't do anything about them

The two swords went first. The plain one, Tenseiga, was fine, but the other she decided to wrap in sheets before handling. She knew all too well what it could do to someone. She'd have to remember to tell Souta not to touch them. How well he'd listen was another story, but if she told him how the sword had possessed its own maker, he would _probably _listen.

She put them both in the closet, beside Tetsusaiga. She closed her eyes. She hardly ever used her closet because that sword was in there. And his fire rat haori. Sango had persuaded her to keep them with her. They were all she had of him now.

Well…she currently had his brother…she supposed he counted…sort of.

Kagome had agreed to take those two things with her dubiously, but had to admit that occasionally taking them out to hold did make him feel closer. Almost as though he was there, watching. Surely he would be glad that his few possessions were still protecting her after his death? He'd always done that…protected her…. Kagome resolutely half shut the door to the closet. She had other things to deal with.

On her desk, Shiro sat up and peeped. She smiled at him, and then went back to the task at hand. Swords down, armor to go.

Kagome gingerly reached across to the nearest clasp, and fumbled with it, finally figuring out how to get it undone. She gently set the fluffy thing he was half lying on beside him, and then worked on getting the armor off, managing it just as her mom came back.

"Good idea. I hate to think of how it would feel to sleep in those." Kagome's mom appeared in the doorway and went across to the bed, gently picking up the end of the filthy furry thing beside Sesshoumaru. "I think I'll wash this. The clothes…well, the clothing is beyond help, I'm afraid. He'll need some new ones. But this might be saved." She started walking to the door, and then stopped. "Is he sitting on it? It's still attached…" Mrs. Higurashi walked back over to the bad, and attempted to pull the ratty fur out from under him.

"A little help Kagome? Prop him up a bit please." Kagome went to do so, slightly nervous. She wasn't sure if it the fur was a tail, or a boa/scarf/something else. Now was as good a time as any to find out.

Her mom yanked at it, but it wasn't moving. "I don't believe it. It's attached to him…"

"You know, I'm not sure what that thing is…it might be a tail."

"Oh…right." Mrs. Higurashi blinked, and then smiled in delight. A tail! Inuyasha had had the most adorable ears…and now, she had someone with a tail! Mrs. Higurashi petted the matted fur, and smiled happily. "That's just as good as ears. Lucky guy."

Kagome rolled her eyes. Right. Inuyasha might have put up with her rubbing his ears…but she just could _not _see Sesshoumaru allowing anyone to pet his tail. Ever.

Except when he was passed out, like now. Kagome shivered, and stared as her mom ran her hands through the ragged tail lovingly one last time.

Her mom was petting Sesshoumaru's tail… The world was so messed up it wasn't even funny…

Kagome got up, and went for the door. "I don't know about you, but I'm famished. I'm going to get a snack then see what else I can do for him. Thank goodness it's Friday. I can take care of him tomorrow and Sunday."

Her mom got up, and then followed her out the door. "You're right…I was halfway through making dinner, and I forgot all about it till now. I'll go finish that."

Kagome went down to the cupboards and rummaged through them, finally coming up with a box of pocky. She grinned, and went back to her room munching on a stick.

She got up the stairs and found Souta poking his nose in the door, staring at the amour and swords propped in the closet with avid eyes. He read entirely too many sword and sorcery stories, and she could tell he'd be in her room to 'borrow' Sesshoumaru's things as soon as she wasn't watching.

"Souta, I wouldn't take them."

Souta turned around sheepishly. His face looked far too innocent to actually be innocent.

"Don't do that. It never works. Sesshoumaru wouldn't appreciate you borrowing his amour, and the swords are dangerous."

"Oh, come on. I'm old enough not to cut myself on th-"

"I didn't mean that," Kagome said, cutting him off. "I was thinking about other things. You see that sword?"

"Yup! It looks pretty cool!" Souta grinned, thinking of all the things he could do with it. Grandpa never let him in storage to look at the swords there. Now his sister was saying he couldn't touch this guy's swords. No fair…

"It possessed its own maker, and he went mad. He tried to kill Inuyasha, all because of that sword. I don't want you touching it."

"But you touched it! You took it off him!"

"I didn't touch it. I wrapped it in a sheet. Besides, I have some defenses. You don't. Now go bother someone else unless you plan on helping me take care of him. Did you feed Shiro like I asked?"

"Yes. He's stuffed, trust me." Souta pouted. Too bad…he'd planned on being Aragorn with that sword and saving Middle Earth …(aka the backyard). He saw her point though. He definitely didn't want to touch something that would take him over like that. He knew the dangers were real. Kagome wouldn't lie about those.

"But I want to know why he's passed out, and why he's here. I thought the well was sealed." Souta brightened. "Is it working again? You can go back!"

Kagome sighed. She'd have to tell him, or he'd never leave her alone. "No, it's not. I was doing inventory in the museum, and I found a statue. I was curious, and I accidentally broke the seal on it. It turned out _he_was actually the statue. I had to get him home, which is why I phoned mom. I'm not looking forward to when they find out the statue is gone."

"So you know how to break seals now! Awesome!"

"No I don't. It was an accident. The scroll was over 450 years old. It was fragile, and I must have busted it by accident. I _still_ don't know how to get back." A shadow of frustration flitted across her face.

"Oh…but you know him, right? Is he related to Inuyasha at all? He looks like him. Are those tattoos?"

"He's his half brother. I know him…a little. I have no idea. Probably markings. You ask him." Kagome sighed. All those questions…

"Ok, I will ask him…when he wakes up! With you looking after him, he'll be up in no time!" Souta grinned excitedly. Maybe he could ask to borrow a sword, too!

Kagome put her hand on her forehead tiredly and looked down. Much as she appreciated the pep talk… "On second thought…how about you _don't_ ask him?"

"Oh." Souta paused as all that sank in. He turned around and decided to go play another game on the x-box. Taking care of people was boring when they were asleep. He'd help Kagome later, but for now she was fine on her own.

Kagome stepped into her room, and sighed as she closed the door behind her. She hoped Souta had gotten the message. She thought he had. She'd get mom to tell him the same over dinner. He actually listened to mom. Don't touch evil swords.

She looked at the bed, then blinked as something occurred to her. Sesshoumaru had her bed, so where would she sleep?

Kagome thought about that for a bit, then settled on the couch in the living room. It was pretty comfortable as couches went, and it would do for a while. They could figure out something more permanent later. And it _would_ be a permanent arrangement.

They'd have to take care of Sesshoumaru for as long as it took for her to reopen the well. He didn't have the skills necessary to survive in this era, and would stick out like a sore thumb. She would teach him, obviously, but it would take a while for him to figure out the basics.

She wondered what he'd think of a shopping mall, or fast food. It would be interesting…especially convincing him not to attack anyone or anything. She still had nightmares about the time Inuyasha had decided to attack a motorcycle. She wondered how well telling him what had happened and getting him to listen would work. She had to try and break though to the past, and _soon_...

Maybe Sesshoumaru knew something? When he was better, he could try and open it, or tell her what he knew. She was sure he would help, if she made it clear it was in his own best interests to do so.

She looked at his sunken cheeks, and wandered back over to the closet to get her spare blankets out. She might as well set up shop downstairs before dinner was ready. Kagome walked back downstairs with a blanket stack higher than her head, and a pillow snitched from her mom's double bed.

Souta blinked as his sister wandered into the living room and started to make a bed on the couch. Why was she…then he smiled. He hadn't thought that, since Sesshoumaru had the bed, his sister would have to sleep somewhere else.

He flicked off the electronics, and went to help her. She smiled and thanked him, then both siblings went to the kitchen for dinner.

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Kagome yawned, and watched as Shiro ate his own dinner. She supposed he might have to move somewhere too if Sesshoumaru decided he didn't care for sparrows. She glanced over at the bed, but he hadn't budged from where they'd put him.

She hoped he woke up soon. She had tried to get him to at least drink some water after dinner, but it hadn't worked too well. The water had ended up all over the sheets instead of down his throat. He had to wake up soon and eat or he might die, going by the way he looked.

If he wasn't up tomorrow, she'd try getting him to drink again, and then try feeding him something. Likely to be an interesting experience…

Kagome said goodnight to Shiro, and looked at Sesshoumaru one last time before going downstairs to the couch. She hoped she'd sleep ok on it, but regardless, tomorrow would be busy. Souta was going to a friend's house after school, and her mom had grocery shopping to do. She'd be mostly on her own, and had planned on going to the mall to relax, but that wasn't going to happen soon.

Ah well. Taking care of the sick was a worthy goal, and the mall came a distant second to that.

Kagome turned and started walking slowly to the living room, still thinking about her day.

Kagome smiled. She hoped Sesshoumaru woke up soon. It was good to see someone from the feudal era, even if he was sleeping, and even if he had never been exactly friendly. He might even know something about her friends, or Shippo. She was dying to hear anything about them. She missed them all so much.

She smiled as she remembered all the good times she and her friends had shared. Shippo drawing something for her with crayons. Miroku and Sango walking together, and the inevitable thump of Sango's hand and/or boomerang connecting with the monk's thick skull. All of them walking together, sitting around a campfire.

In the dark, Kagome smiled. She hoped she'd go back there soon. Surely with Sesshoumaru's help she would be able to do that. That would solve all **her** problems, as well as all the new ones finding him had suddenly created for not for her, but also for her family's straining budget.

Kagome wiped at an eye, and sat down on her makeshift bed. Gods, she was tired…today had been hard on her. Work, and then finding Sesshoumaru and attempting to get him home…. She stretched out, and was almost immediately dead to the world.

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_Very long chapter, (omg, it's over 18 pages! O.o) but hopefully interesting, because Sesshoumaru reappeared, somewhat the worse for wear. Huzza! XD_

_Next chapter: Sesshoumaru, meet the modern world. Lol._

_See that button down there? The 'review' one? (Obey the button!)_

_Until next Wednesday…Ja amata!XD_


	5. ch 4 : Rise and Shine

**: Rise and Shine :**

Kagome woke up on the couch, and was momentarily confused as to why she was there, before she remembered Sesshoumaru, and the way he was currently monopolizing her bed. She shook her head to clear it of the night's cobwebs and got off the couch, trekking up to her room to get clothing for the day.

Sesshoumaru was asleep, in the same position as yesterday. He looked a little better in the morning light, but still like someone's old dishrag. She would come back later after breakfast and try to rouse him. If that didn't work, she'd have to try getting him to drink and eat while asleep. Kagome made a face. That would not be fun at all.

She walked over to the seldom-opened closet and pulled a pair of slacks out, careful not to disturb the swords lying on the floor. She backed up, and nearly tripped over her backpack, cursing softly. She halfheartedly kicked at it.

Now that she noticed, there was a lot of stuff lying around where it hadn't been before. She bent down and attempted to clear the floor a little. Wouldn't do to have someone break a neck because they tripped on her junk. When the floor was as clean as 5 minutes would make it, she fed Shiro, and then left for the bathroom to change. It just didn't seem right to strip in her own room while Sesshoumaru was there, asleep or no.

As soon as she stepped out, feeling ready to face the day, the phone rang. Kagome cursed in her head again, and then picked it up. She had picked up a lot from Inuyasha when it came to cursing…she was surprised she knew some of the words that flew out of her mouth on occasion…but really. What sane person phoned someone at 9 on a Saturday? In the afternoon was different…but this early?

"Hi, Kagome speaking." She said cheerfully. Just because she felt like biting the person's head off for phoning at this hour didn't mean she wouldn't be polite.

"Hi Kagome! This is Yuka and Eri. We're at the mall, and you're missing in action. What happened to you? Sleep in on accident? I can't believe you'd do that when there's a sale on!"

Kagome sighed. True enough. She had promised them she'd meet them to shop this Saturday, and Yuka had no way of knowing she'd suddenly changed her plans. "Yes, I was planning on going. Something came up." Sesshoumaru had come up. She had no intention of wandering off and letting him wake up to an empty house and unfamiliar world. Although they didn't need to know that.

"Ah. I'm sorry to hear that. Maybe we'll drop by later?"

Kagome's heart nearly skipped a beat. That would be disaster. "Ah…maybe not. How about I call you and we do something another time? I'm kinda tied up at the moment…"

"Damn. Talk to you later then. We have to get down to the shops early…"

'_Yeah, early is right. Even a sale isn't worth that much.'_ "Talk to you later. Bye." She hung up the phone, and wandered over to the kitchen. Ramen sounded very good right now.

Kagome flipped on the radio as the ramen boiled, grimacing as one of her most loathed pop songs floated out of the speaker. Souta was always messing with the radio. She set it to a bearable talk show and news station, cursing the slowness of the boiling water tiredly.

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Yuka flipped her cellphone closed, and looked at Eri. "She's busy…I can't help but feel we've been ditched." She pouted slightly. She hated being put off, even if Kagome usually had reason. It still stung to be given the brush-off from anyone.

"I'm sure there's a reason." Eri said thoughtfully, biting her lip. She wouldn't have said she was busy unless she really **was** busy…but what could she possibly be doing on a Saturday that was more important than window browsing?

"Yeah. I'll ask later. Let's get shopping!" Yuka tried shoving worrying about Kagome to the back of her mind, and walked into the mall. They'd find out soon enough. She would make sure of that.

Yuka frowned. Usually, Kagome would have been doing something with Hojo…that was generally why she had to skip out when they called. But it couldn't be that now, so what was it? Hmm. She blinked…wasn't she trying to shop? Yuka resolutely struck out for the nearest clothing outlet, Eri close behind.

Eri wasn't so quick to forget. It was rare for Kagome to not keep a promise…in fact, the only time she'd ever backed out of something was when she'd been sick all the time. She hadn't had a relapse in a year, but still, Eri worried about her.

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Sesshoumaru frowned, slowly surfacing from the dark. He could hear the distant echo of singing, and strange, melodic sounds. It was like no music he had ever heard…and then, it suddenly switched to the cheerful voice of a man talking about something he couldn't quite grasp. He wondered what had happened to that strange music, then gave a mental shrug.

Smell was the second thing that hit him. Millions of scents all crowded into his head, each unfamiliar and demanding his attention. He felt lost in them, overpowered, battered by waves of strangeness that dwarfed the few familiar items to near insignificance.

There was a distant, vaguely acrid scent mixed with iron (gasoline and plastic) Dozens of different, but similar, smells to that first one, and more metal. New fabrics. The scent of a sparrow's house. Cat. The freshly washed sheets of the bed he was in, somehow not…natural, the closest in the downpour of sensation assaulting his nose. The sheets were quite soft against him, and he relaxed into them languidly, eyes still closed. He didn't want to move. If he was dead, then this had to be heaven.

He couldn't imagine that he had ever made it to heaven, so therefore, he had to be alive. A moment later, he winced as his legs made it known how cramped they were. One foot was asleep, as was his tail. No. This was definitely earth.

The last thing he remembered was a room, a grey wall, bricks, and dust. And the human girl. His head felt rather muzzy after that, and he had fallen over…where was he now, and why? Why was he free?

There had to be well over a billion different new odors drifting in on the breeze, not least of which was the pervasive smell of human. There had to be thousands of them around here, or more. He could smell them everywhere, more than he'd ever seen at once…He shifted slightly, and frowned. There was one other scent, very strong, floating around the room. A human scent. A familiar one…where had he smelled it before? Was it that girl…?

He still couldn't recall much, but he remembered her. She'd freed him. Perhaps this was her scent everywhere. She must spend a lot of time in this room for it to be so pervasive. It was all over the sheets, spread across the mattress. He must be in her bed, though the girl, rescuer or not, wasn't here now. Thankfully. He wasn't exactly pleased to find himself in a human's bed, though he knew he should be grateful it wasn't worse.

Who cared? Right that instant, he had caught the distant smell of something cooking, hidden behind the distant bustle of the busy streets far below, and the oddly flat voice talking about a 'United States Trade Agreement', whatever that was. All else was second to food right now. He winced as his stomach made abundantly clear how empty it was.

Sesshoumaru's eyes flew open at last, and he took in the strange sight around him. Sunlight drifting through an open window onto the unfamiliar bed, and oddly made furniture. It looked like someone's sleeping quarters, even if the bed wasn't in the familiar style of a futon. A human girl's room. He still couldn't place that scent. Everything but his recent imprisonment seemed distant, as though it had happened to someone else. He blinked owlishly, confused. It was nothing like what he was used to at all. About half the things here had no immediately discernible purpose.

Again, who cared? He'd find out soon enough, hopefully. The perceived freedom was enough for now. He stretched a bit, and smiled slightly. So wonderful to just be able to _move_…even if his tail was sending needles of protest through his skin. He hated it when his tail fell asleep on him.

Free…at long last, he was free of the stone. He'd thought towards the end that he would die as a miserable lump of rock. Not exactly a glorious death in battle, which was a more fitting end for the Taiyoukai of the West. He'd resigned himself to death in that room, and it felt strange to be alive, with slight hope for the future. He had been given another chance, and he was going to use it to find Damia and kill her and her pet miko.

The odd room could wait. Food was **far** more important. And water. Sesshoumaru sat up, wincing as his head throbbed, and swung his legs to the floor. He stood up shakily, and had to put his hand on the wall to balance. Most irritating. He had never been this weak in his life.

He sighed. It was only to be expected, after what he'd just come through. Truth be told, he was surprised he could stand as well as this. Sesshoumaru inched along the wall and out the door. He started to feel he wasn't doing too badly, when he stopped and then stared at the long flight of stairs leading down to where that mouthwatering smell was coming from.

The world wasn't fair. He didn't think he could take stairs at this hour.

Sesshoumaru grimaced and braced himself, then carefully took a step, hanging onto the rail as though his life depended on it. He hoped he wouldn't fall on his swords if he did end up toppling over.

Wait. Sesshoumaru blinked. Where were his swords? And armor? Now that he thought about it, he hadn't been sleeping in his armour the way one would expect. Whoever had rescued him had taken it somewhere. He really was out of it if he could miss those and not realize it.

Sesshoumaru paused. He didn't think they would be hidden from him. Whoever had taken him in hadn't given any indications of hostility. There were no guards posted, no way to prevent him from climbing out the open window. If he could. He didn't want to look for the swords or armor until after he was fed. He would even eat human food at this point.

Seeing as he was in a human's house, it seemed likely that would be all they had. Sesshoumaru put the puzzle of the missing swords aside for later with everything else, and kept going down the stairs grimly. _Food_…

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Kagome hummed to herself as the ramen cooled enough for her to eat it. She took a sip, and sighed. The wonders of instant breakfast. She started to sit down, then jumped as a loud thump and distant crashes echoed from the stairwell. The ramen jumped right along with her, and ended up on the floor. Kagome made a low sound of disgust. There went breakfast…

She dashed out of the kitchen, and blinked in surprise as she took in the scene in front of her. Sesshoumaru was tangled up in his own tail at the bottom of the stairs, and having a hard time getting up. It was somewhat darkly amusing, but she didn't dare laugh. At least he had woken up…

"Need a hand?"

Sesshoumaru froze, and looked at her warily. Yes, it was the same girl. He could almost remember where he'd seen her before too…for some reason he kept picturing her in green and white.

He didn't need any help from a human. Not at all. Even if he _was_ on the verge of falling over again. "I am quite capable of getting up on my own."

Who was she, and why was he in her home? He didn't think she could harm him, or keep him here, but looks were deceiving. And at the moment, he thought sourly, a human could probably beat him with one hand if he had this much trouble getting up.

Right. Kagome watched with one eyebrow raised as he struggled to stand, pulling himself up using the banister as an aid. If you asked her, he could use the help, but was just being stubborn. Like his brother…Kagome blinked. He looked so much like Inuyasha had…no. She wasn't going to think about that now, or feel guilty for helping Sesshoumaru. Inuyasha wasn't here now to argue with her about it, and she couldn't afford being distracted by the memory of their rivalry.

She had to take care of his brother, which would need her full attention. He would need food first. The skinny arm and hollow cheeks were enough to make her own stomach hurt in sympathy.

She sighed when he was upright again, and crossed her arms. He was in no condition to decide to be stubborn about help. What would he be like when he was recovered, if this was how he acted now? She watched him look around slowly, and head unerringly for the kitchen. She followed, slippers flopping on her feet. Sesshoumaru paused, and looked at the noodles cooling on the floor in puzzlement.

Kagome reached over to the radio, and turned off the commercials. Sesshoumaru glanced at the speakers, confused. How had she stopped the voices from speaking with a simple click? Was she a miko? He rather thought she was. It felt right…his fingers twitched slightly in exasperation. He knew he knew her from somewhere, but where? Who was she? It was maddening.

Kagome waited as he looked at the kitchen, arms still crossed. What was he waiting for?

"What is that?" Sesshoumaru finally asked, and Kagome laughed slightly. He must mean the ramen. So that's why he was down here…he'd followed his nose.

"The food, you mean? You'll have to wait a few minutes. I had some Ramen made, but as you can see, it's on the floor. I dropped it when I ran out there to see what was going on." Kagome pushed past him towards the cupboards, Sesshoumaru wobbling along behind her.

Sesshoumaru scowled slightly at having to wait, and to follow behind someone. It was degrading…but he was hungry. Everything else came second by now. At least he was being fed, and taken care of. Even if it was by a human girl, and even if he still didn't know her reasons for doing so. The only time someone had ever taken care of him without a motive…Rin. Only Rin.

He was honest enough with himself to know he couldn't cope alone at this point. He didn't have to be happy about it, but it was the truth. And he needed information. Where was he? It must be a long way from home. The very air smelled different, laced with sharp odors he had never dreamed existed before. After a few days of rest and questioning, it would be different, but for now, he'd have to put up with the human.

If she was like Rin, he wouldn't have minded…he blinked that odd thought away. Where had it come from?

He hoped he would get some answers soon. How long had he been a captive? Was he still a captive, with different chains? He doubted it, but it was possible. He had to know before he could start planning how to take back his lands from Damia. She would probably be entrenched in them by now. It would be hard work to dig her out, but at the least it was something to do.

It would be good to get his edge back. He still felt fuzzy headed after his…who knew how long…incarceration in various buildings. He didn't really care whether Damia held onto his lands or not, and wasn't quite sure what he'd do with them once she was ousted. It was the slow uncoiling of anger in him that made tracking her down necessary.

Vengeance. Paid with Damia's blood, with Mesau's blood.

It wasn't as though he had something else to attend to. He didn't have to look after Rin anymore…Sesshoumaru blinked again. He wished he did have her to take care of, but he didn't. Poor little Rin…. Damia was ultimately to blame, but for that, Mesau would _die_.

After so many years of stewing in the dark, he could finally do something. He was going to make up for all his stasis by doing everything in his power to find her, and kill them both. They'd caught him by chance, and he wasn't going to give them an advantage again. Outrage, so long buried, was slowly filtering up into his mind. Damia was going to pay dearly…he stopped. He'd think on it later, after he ate something.

Maybe now he was 'free', he could move on. He wasn't sitting in the dark and brooding. He looked down, frowning at his tail. It looked like he'd been fighting in mud. He had to fix that soon. No doubt the rest of him was in similar condition.

He stared at the back of his hand. It almost looked like it belonged to someone else. If it weren't for the claws and magenta strips, he'd have said it _did_ belong to someone else. He flexed his fingers, and the hand he was watching moved. No, this was definitely his hand…even if it looked like something a skeleton would own.

A few days of rest and** food** should fix that. He hoped.

He'd have to concentrate, and find out what was going on. Later, there would be time to turn everything over in his mind, and reflect. He would be able to make a more informed decision. It would be better to wait till he wasn't foggy in the head.

Kagome started humming as she pulled another two cups of ramen out and set water to boiling. She smiled as Sesshoumaru glanced around the kitchen, clearly interested. He wouldn't have seen most of this before.

She walked over behind him. "Now's as good a time to say this as any, but you've probably noticed a lot of new things, Sesshoumaru. You were sealed for a long time."

Sesshoumaru paused. How did she know his name? He _must_ know her from somewhere…or at least, she knew him.

Kagome took the silence as her cue to go on. "When were you sealed? I'll be able to tell you approximately how long you were a statue then. How long after we killed Naraku were you sealed?" She paused. "Oh yes, and I'm Kagome. I don't know if you remember that, but generally whenever we saw you, you were trying to take the Tetsusaiga from Inuyasha"

Sesshoumaru did remember her now. His brother's wench…he didn't remember her name being mentioned back then, but… he knew who she was now, though not exactly why she'd taken him in. In his experience, one did not take in an enemy.

"Naraku is dead?" When had that happened? After he was sealed, obviously. He felt somewhat cheated. He had wanted to be the one to kill the ambitious hanyou. It didn't really matter of course. Dead was dead. Still…Naraku had been very irritating…nothing like the hate he felt for some individuals, of course. He hadn't been worth it. _Still_…

Kagome blinked. For some reason she was sure he'd been sealed after that, but apparently she'd been wrong. And who knew how much else she was wrong about besides.

Damn. He would know even less than she about her friends, if he'd been sealed before that final battle. "Yes. He's dead. Inuyasha, Sango, Miroku and I killed him." Kagome closed here eyes as old grief washed over her. She pushed it gently to one side, and smiled with an effort. "Well, that makes it simpler. You've been sealed just under 450 years then. A long time, and a lot's changed. I'll help you figure out how this world works. You'll need to know that."

Kagome had seen him shortly before exterminating Naraku, so he couldn't have been sealed long after that. She wondered what had happened to him.

Sesshoumaru stopped cold. 450 _years_? He knew his imprisonment had felt like centuries, but he hadn't considered it might be the case. He could hardly believe it. Especially because she would be dead if that were the case. Had he really spent 450 years sitting in dust, watching the decay of centuries with an insomniac's eyes? No wonder he'd been in such poor shape. A little longer in that room, and he would have died for sure. "You look only a little older than you did then. How is it you are not dead, if that is true?" He'd call her bluff. No human could survive that long, normally. If there was magic at work, he'd have smelled it.

Come to think of it, there was power around, and quite strong. He must have missed it just as he'd missed his armour. He really did need food and rest, much as it pained him to admit it. It felt like a barrier…almost as strong as the holy one around the mountain of Hakureizan. He needed sleep. If he couldn't pay attention, he might end up dead. He tried his hardest to focus on what the girl was saying.

"I was originally from here. I traveled back in time. I think I went to 1547, but it's hard to tell. That's why. It's 2001 at the moment."

Sesshoumaru paused, and thought about it for a bit. Kagome let him be to think though it, concentrating instead on the breakfast. It did make sense. He'd smelled no lie. It had to be part, or all, of the truth. He was abruptly jolted out of his brooding when the kettle beeped loudly. "Ah, foods almost ready." Kagome got up and bustled around the kitchen. She set a cup of ramen by Sesshoumaru, and then one where she was sitting, before going for a cloth to clear up the mess on the floor.

Sesshoumaru reached out to the odd smelling food, and sniffed gingerly at it. He'd never seen this type of food before, except for what was on the floor. He picked up the pair of chopsticks sitting by the paper cup, and stared to eat. He blinked in surprise as the flavors filtered though. He'd not expected human food to taste like this. Mortal food was generally not as good as that his own household prepared, and didn't have the variety.

Aside from the taste, he had different needs than a human. He'd have to try hunting soon, once he was well enough.

Obviously, if what Kagome said was true, great improvements had been made in the taste of food. One thing he'd noticed about humans was the way they were always making new things, more so of late….or rather, of 450 years ago. He had to remember that this was a different time.

He ate slowly, willing himself not to give into desire and start stuffing the food into himself as fast as he could. Sesshoumaru might be almost dead from hunger, but he wasn't about to wolf down dinner.

Kagome came back with the rag, and started to clear away the food she'd spilled. "You like it?"

Sesshoumaru didn't bother to answer through a mouthful of noodle. Kagome smiled, and then decided to make more ramen. He had to be starving…Inuyasha, on a good day, ate multiple cups of ramen. On a hungry day, he ate many more. No doubt his brother would be the same…especially when he looked only a minute away from keeling over dead of starvation. She moved her own cup over to where he was sitting, and started three more. Sesshoumaru looked at the second cup briefly; then started in on it without hesitation.

Kagome changed her mind, and pulled a few more cups off the shelf. He looked like he could use them.

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After Sesshoumaru had eaten, he leaned back slightly. Perhaps the girl would tell him more of what was going on now that food was dealt with.

Kagome set aside her own breakfast, and stopped. Time to say a few things…she hoped it would work. She had to make one thing very clear at the start. Learning how this world worked, and asking him about the well, could come later once he'd settled in. She cleared her throat slightly.

"…Ah…I'd like it if you stayed inside the house, for the most part. I doubt you're feeling up to going anywhere but back to bed, but when you're feeling better, please stay inside. Youkai aren't…common…here, and it would be dangerous for us both."

As he listened to the explanation, it became clear that the impossible had happened. The girl was taking an enemy under her roof, and not as a prisoner. The only limitations set were for protection. This truly was a different time, if that happened. Perhaps she had plans for later.

Sesshoumaru stared at her. No one ordered him around, even if she had phrased it as a request and even if it was for their mutual good. He could tell she expected to be obeyed. While she was right about his near plans including sleep, she wasn't right to assume he would do as she asked. Not unless there was good reason. Then **he** would decide whether to stay inside or not.

"Why do you think that?"

Kagome sighed and rubbed her head tiredly. It was too early for this. She snorted softly. She supposed she should be glad he was being reasonable, and not being stubborn. Or at least, what passed for reasonable with him. He was asking why she'd told him to stay in, and listening to her. That didn't mean he would do what she asked, unfortunately, but it was a start.

"In this era, there are _no_ youkai. I've looked for them, and found nothing. If you go out without knowing a thing, you'll stick out. You'll most likely be arrested for breaking a law you don't even know exists. Or shot when you decide you don't want to be arrested. I'll be in a lot of trouble if they find out about time travel. You might even die. It's not worth the risk. Welcome to 2001."

Sesshoumaru absorbed that. No youkai? What kind of world was this? Perhaps youkai just didn't live nearby. She wasn't lying when she'd said she knew of no youkai, but that didn't mean that she was right.

He owed it to his apparent 'rescuer' to not bring trouble to her doorstep. It wouldn't be right to do that after she'd gone to such trouble. Not that he was going to thank her. He'd never asked to be freed, or taken in by the little human. But it just wasn't honorable to turn around and do that to her.

Death came for everyone, but if his movements were hampered by this 'arrested'…it might be a bit of an annoyance. He didn't think that humans would be able to hold him unless they had a **very** good miko, but it didn't hurt to be cautious when working blind. One miko had managed to put him away before, and it had taken him 450 years and another miko to get loose. He wasn't about to take a chance again so soon after the last time.

He had no idea what arrested entailed, but he'd been shot at once. He hadn't paid much attention, having stopped the bullets with his whip, but it wasn't his idea of fun. If food had improved this much in 450 years, what had happened to guns? Humans were far too adept at thinking up new ways to kill things. They were even worse than youkai when it came to bloodlust.

Sesshoumaru wasn't stupid. The girl was right. He had no idea what this world was like, and she had implied she would help him to understand it. Even in this room, and the sleeping quarters, there were things he knew nothing of. Even the sunlight was changed, as though it had to get though a layer of smoke. It suddenly crashed in on him exactly how far away he was from home, with no way back.

He drooped slightly in his seat before straightening again hurriedly. He would not falter. He'd always liked learning, and it would be useful to know more. Once he understood it, he would be able to track down Damia, if she was still around, and kill her. He had to. It was all he could think to do.

Of course…she might already be dead. He wasn't quite sure what he would do if that was the case. Apart from revenge, he was adrift. He had nothing to live for.

Perhaps learning more about this strange new world was a good idea. If he must, he would stay inside, and learn. It would provide something to do.

"I will do as you ask. Providing you teach me about the changes I see." He hated to bargain as though Kagome was his equal, but in this world, she was. Now, she was the only one who could help him, and he knew it. If youkai were 'nonexistent', and time travel not to be spoken of, then it was unlikely others would help him. He had to know more, soon. Then he could decide what to do after. Information was always power.

Kagome stared at him. Was he actually making a deal with her? She smiled. Wonders never ceased. "Deal. We'll start with the kitchen. That way, you can at least feed yourself."

Feed himself? He'd been doing that for years. Point him in the direction of the forest, and that was all she needed to do.

Kagome got up from the table, and walked to the sink. "Water gets piped in here. The taps work like this…" She demonstrated. "The kettle I was using before runs off electricity. When you plug it in the wall, and turn it on." Kagome pointed at the switch "Water boils. To make ramen, just add boiling water, let it sit, and then eat." She rummaged in the cupboards for a minute. "Tea?"

Sesshoumaru jerked his head. "Alright. Here's the teapot, and a teabag. Hop to it." She grinned, and pushed the kettle at him.

He examined the tealeaves in their bag, briefly wondering why they weren't loose before he looked up at her, staring.

She was telling him to make tea.

Like some lowly servant. He had trouble remembering the last time he'd been ordered to do something, and had to think hard. It would have been either his father, mother, or teachers who had done that.

_None_ of them had ever told him to make tea.

He almost growled, then calmed slightly. She wanted to know if he understood or not. He nearly sniffed in disdain. She must think him stupid. That nearly made him growl again. He was an intelligent being, and she should know that. Hadn't he agreed to see what was going on, despite the slight to his position?

'_What position? You're landless. Worthless. Dead, as far as anyone knows, and have been for 450 years._' He nearly growled at the treacherous thought too, but the logic was inarguable. It was true he had no land or title, but while he lived he had his honor. Even Damia hadn't taken that from him entirely.

Either scenario, servant or idiot was bad, but Sesshoumaru just turned around and filled up the kettle. He had to know this, although it grated horribly. Whether she thought him stupid or thought him a servant, it didn't matter. For the time being, she would be his teacher. For now. He would leave as soon as he knew enough to survive without having to depend on a mere human, miko or not. That was just as grating.

He'd do what must be done.

Kagome watched, somewhat surprised as Sesshoumaru turned the tap on for a minute, plugged the kettle into the wall, and waited for the water to boil with his usual poker face. She couldn't imagine what he thought of her telling him to do things like that, but it couldn't be good. She was surprised he was being so co-operative. She realized she'd expected the usual arguments Inuyasha would have been making from him.

Kagome frowned. That wasn't good, making a little mental image of a person like that. He was different from Inuyasha, although she now could attest to the fact he was just as stubborn, if not worse. She didn't know anything about why he'd been sealed for 450 years, or why he'd emerged looking like death refried on the stove. Speaking of which…

"After that's boiled, I think we should go upstairs. I'm sure you would appreciate clean clothes and a chance to wash up. Oh yes. And your armour and swords are in the closet collecting dust."

Sesshoumaru's back stiffened. Collecting dust…no. He would think about the chance to clean up instead. He'd not realized until he looked closely how bedraggled his appearance had become over his entombment. Like a peasant who'd been working the fields. His eyes darted to the once immaculate fur on his tail, and he nearly grimaced at the dirt embedded in it. It would take _ages_ to get it clean.

"That would be acceptable."

'_Pompous guy, isn't he? Gah. Why am I putting up with him again? Oh yes. Can't let him out on his own because some unlucky person will cheese him off, and__…it'll go down hill from there.'_ Kagome blinked, and then watched as the kettle started to boil.

Sesshoumaru poured the kettle into the teapot, letting the water run over the teabag, and carefully poured tea for himself once steeped, since she made no move to help. Kagome fought not to laugh. She had a feeling it would be bad for future teaching – not to mention her health - if she did. She couldn't suppress the smile, but at least she wasn't laughing. Although who knew how much Sesshoumaru could hear…

Kagome grabbed her own cup and filled it. "Ok. Back up to the bathroom. That's the room next to mine…the one you woke up in. I'll have to see if any of the clothing in the attic fits you while I deal with those." She jerked her head at his slightly yellowed silks meaningfully, frowning. "I think they're beyond help, quite frankly. I'll get new ones for you tomorrow."

Sesshoumaru carefully picked up his own glass of tea, and walked slowly back to the stairs. He reluctantly agreed with her. The silk hadn't faired nearly as well as he during his entombment. He paused a moment at the bottom, and Kagome, standing behind him, had a moments panic he might go for another tumble. She probably wouldn't be able to catch him, and he was damn heavy anyway…and he wouldn't like being 'helped'…

Sesshoumaru looked at the cup in his hand, and at the rail. He cursed for the infinite and oneth time the day he'd been stupid enough to let Inuyasha cut off his other arm, then got a firm grip on the cup and started up the stairs grimly. If he'd been idiot enough to lose his arm, he would do without. He wasn't helpless in any way. He wasn't going to let himself fall again. That would be too humiliating for him to bear.

Imagine. The lord of the west – no matter that he was no longer lord there – being beaten by fatigue and a petty little stairwell, one he could have jumped up easily if he felt better. Unfortunately, he didn't. Food had helped though. That 'ramen' had been quite good. He might go down later and have Kagome make more of it for him…

…or not. She might just leave him on his own now he knew how to make ramen. And tea. How 'nice'.

Kagome followed him up the stairs to her room anxiously, then turned in to the bathroom. She started explaining that the taps worked the same as the ones downstairs, and that the same principles applied to the shower. Soap and shampoo were next.

"They're for washing…I'm sure you know what soap is. Shampoo is pretty much the same, except it's especially for hair. Works better." she told him, and smiled.

Kagome turned, and paused at the door, telling him she'd leave clothing for him outside the door after she found it in the attic. She then said that he was to put his own dirty clothes outside for her to deal with. Sesshoumaru had no problems with that. Youkai were somewhat more conscious of smell than humans, and tended to take more frequent baths because of it.

He turned bemused eyes on the shower as she closed the door, and started working on his clothing one handed. He struggled with it for a bit, then eventually shrugged them off. It was always a battle to get them on and off by himself, though he was better now at managing. Sesshoumaru shoved them outside with a foot, and caught sight of his face in the mirror.

He hardly recognized his own face. The stranger starring at him in the glass couldn't be him. Sesshoumaru brushed a stray bit of hair behind his ears, and turned away. He looked weak. Beaten.

Pathetic.

He considered the shower and the bottle of shampoo for a minute, then opened it up with his thumb. He upended the bottle awkwardly over his head and tail, and stepped in.

Now, she'd said these little knobs worked the same as the sink. Sesshoumaru reached for the hot water, and nearly gasped as he was drenched in scalding water. He blinked furiously to clear his vision, and winced as the shampoo reached his eyes. This might be a little harder than he'd thought…

He added cold and hot water till it was pleasantly warm, and then got down to the serious business of clearing his hair and tail of dirt.

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Kagome climbed up to the attic, and sneezed at the clouds of dust motes raised by her feet. Sesshoumaru's clothing might be dusty, but whatever she found up here would be almost as bad. Ah well. At least it wouldn't be yellow with age.

She was sure her mother had kept some of her grandfather's clothing, and possibly some of her father's. If worst came to worse, she could get a housecoat from her own room. She had one slightly too big for her from last Christmas in her closet. It might be made to fit the much taller youkai downstairs in the shower while she got new ones.

Ah. Here they were. Kagome pulled out one of the boxes labeled 'clothing' in tape, and started to unpack them. First was a layer of baby clothes, then a small green dress. Kagome smiled. She'd loved that dress when she was younger, and had worn it often. Green was one of her favorite colors, and had been as long as she could remember.

'_Perhaps that's why I wore my uniform to the feudal era. I liked the colors, even though it was almost the worst thing I could have worn'_ Kagome laughed quietly. When she went back, she wouldn't wear a uniform. Not only was she no longer a student at her old school, but she preferred the slacks and t shirt she had on now. If nothing else, they were warmer. But she would still wear green. Never red.

She set the dress aside, and dug through layers of family history. There was even her first elementary school uniform folded neatly at the bottom, but no sign of larger clothing. Something of Souta's, particularly from when he was three, wasn't what she had in mind.

Kagome packed the first box back up, and then pulled out the second one. This must be it. It was …interesting…to find old clothing. You remembered everywhere you'd worn it, the things you'd done, and the people you'd done them with.

She lifted the lid, and smiled at her mom's old blouse. She could remember a picture of her mom wearing that blouse, standing with dad, holding her between them as a baby. Kagome lifted the blouse out of the way, and smiled sadly.

Below was what her dad had been wearing for that same picture. She lifted it out, and cast a critical eye over the well worn jeans and faded t-shirt. Probably too short, but good enough for now. She picked up a musty pair of pajama's from beneath the jeans, and took them too. Sesshoumaru was probably going to go to sleep again sometime soon and could use them. From the little she remembered of her dad before that crash, he wouldn't have minded.

She'd have to take Sesshoumaru shopping, or at least go out herself to get something. She didn't think taking him out immediately was a great idea. The mall had been stressful for Inuyasha when he'd gone. So many people and scents. It would be worse for his brother. Particularly since he wasn't all that well.

Besides, Inuyasha had been somewhat used to the way her world worked by then. Sesshoumaru, apart from making tea, had no idea what it was like.

Somehow, boiling water for tea didn't seem quite like the right prerequisite for the mall.

Kagome sifted down to the bottom of the box, and turned up another t-shirt that might fit him. There were a few old outfits her grandpa had worn around the shrine, but nothing else. Kagome imagined Sesshoumaru wearing her grandpa's hakama, which would probably come just past his knees, and laughed.

She replaced the box, and took the jeans, shirts and pajama's downstairs. She shook them out a bit, and then left them outside the bathroom. There was a small heap of white outside the door, with a splash of patterned red silk poking out from underneath.

"I found a few things…you'll have to supply your own underwear for now, though."

Inside the shower, Sesshoumaru frowned. What was that? Under…did she mean undergarments? The words she used were so strange…

"I'll leave your own clothes for now, if you need to get the underwear back. The red pajama's are for sleeping in later, the jeans and t shirt is what a lot of people wear. I'm going to work on setting up the spare futon. I'll be downstairs if you need me." Kagome went back to the attic. There was a very old, and probably mothballed, futon up there which might be better than the couch. She went up to get it, and left Sesshoumaru to dry off.

Sesshoumaru finally gave up on drying his long hair and the fur on his tail completely, and left it damp. His eyebrows creased in annoyance as his fur decided to poof out, making his tail look twice as big as it normally was. And it was wet. Most annoying. Even the thick towels laid out for use hadn't been able to get all the water out. He wrapped his oversized tail around his shoulder in its accustomed place, and went to look at the pile of clothing outside the door. He peered at the new additions to his wardrobe with confusion.

He could tell that the blue, heavy material had to be an odd sort of hakama, and that the other had to be like a haori, but how did they go _on_? He was temped to put on the red pajama's, since they looked easier to put on, but wouldn't if they were for sleeping. He glared at the 'jeans' There was nothing to tie it with! He looked at a metal clip, and the two toothed edges it was attached to on the weird blue hakama. How did it work?

He wrapped the end of his tail in towels to stop it dripping on the wet floor. He could at least _try_ to put these uncomfortable looking clothes on.

He fought with the shirts, and eventually got one on, then started dueling with the heavy blue pants. Much harder, especially with only an arm and a tail to work with.

1111111111111

Kagome made up the bed in the living room, having moved all her things to the corner. She'd have to talk with her mom about emptying the storage room out a bit, or finding another place to set up shop. Sleeping in the middle, or even a corner, of the living room wasn't fun.

People moved in and out of it all day, and she had to remember if the stuff she needed was in the living room, or in her bedroom. Just like the last time there had been a family reunion, when she was seven. She'd been stuck in the living room, while her cousins got her room.

It was just a little confusing to have her things split between here and there. Almost as bad as what moving would be like. Kagome hoped her family would never be moving. The shrine was too important to her mother. She certainly couldn't imagine moving while her grandpa was alive. He'd die before the shrine was ever given into the hands of strangers.

Kagome put the finishing touches on her futon in the corner, and then got up to see if the tea in the kitchen was still hot.

She sighed in disappointment as the tea proved to be stone cold, so she started working on making a new pot. A noise behind her made her turn, and she blinked as Sesshoumaru entered the kitchen. She hadn't thought about how modern clothing would look to his feudal eyes at all.

He'd done not too bad with the top. It was on correctly…but he wasn't wearing the jeans properly at all. He'd somehow managed to put them on backwards, and had conveniently used the open zipper to accommodate his tail, which looped around to its usual shoulder perch there like some dripping, fuzzy bird of prey.

Kagome stared a moment longer, then covered the grin on her lips with one hand. "I'm sorry…I forgot you wouldn't know what a zipper is." She looked at her own slacks, and frowned a bit. She couldn't use what she had on as an example. "First off, the zipper goes in the front. If you go and fix that, I'll show you how it works."

"Zipper?"

"The metal zipper that you stuck your tail through"

Sesshoumaru frowned, and went back to where the stairs were. He'd gotten a little better at going up and down, now he was up and about.

Kagome swallowed. This wasn't happening. She wasn't going to have to show Sesshoumaru how to put on clothing on top of everything else, was she? Gah…she would have top make sure to buy him some casual clothing in a more traditional style. It might be easier on her than explaining the wonders of something like zippers or Velcro or…oh god. What was she doing?

'_Why me?'_ she groaned in her head. _'Why me?'_ She watched Sesshoumaru as headed off, presumably to attempt putting on the jeans again. She pulled a chair out, and flopped down, waiting for Sesshoumaru to reappear. She prayed he got it right. She didn't know that she'd be able to help him get dressed…if he'd even allow the help. What about explaining something like underwear…? Her worst nightmare…she was not going there, not ever….

She almost wished Yuka was here. She'd have thought it was the best joke in the world, and then helped Sesshoumaru with the zipper. And perhaps other things after.

Maybe it was lucky Yuka wasn't in on her secret after all…

Kagome frowned as a small clicking sound disturbed her thoughts. She looked at a pair of feet with magenta stripes and claws, then squinted up at Sesshoumaru's face. Why was he so tall, and she so short? The world wasn't fair.

She looked at the now correctly put on pair of jeans, and sighed. "That's how they go on." It seemed she would be spared giving a lesson. Hurrah for small miracles.

"Is this the normal attire of your land?"

"Yes. And it's not 'my land'. We're still in Japan. Beside the bone eaters well, actually."

Beside the well? This time was stranger than he'd thought. "We will discuss this later. You will tell me everything you know after I wake up." They were in the same land? It seemed impossible…and how had she gone time traveling? How had she gone back and forth through time? If Kagome could…maybe he could… Sesshoumaru didn't let himself get his hopes up, but if that was the case…

He'd deal with it after he slept, and was properly awake.

Kagome put her head in her hand and kneaded her forehead. She glanced at the clock. It was only one in the afternoon. It had taken her a long time to set up downstairs. "I know a lot. That would take years. I have a job. I have to do other things. I'm not your maid, Sesshoumaru. Get that straight now, or you'll be disappointed later."

Sesshoumaru didn't say anything, but he looked thoughtful.

He had to remember that this was a new time…Kagome might have said they were in the same spot geographically, but the way she thought was completely foreign. She treated him as her equal, despite his birth. She talked strangely, wore strange clothing. She thought not only as a human, but as a human 450 years removed from what he knew.

Sesshoumaru suddenly felt very tired. He didn't really want to have to deal with this. He just wanted to sleep, after fighting with the pajama's …if he could have wished for something in that moment it would have been to return to the long afternoons of sitting in the shade of trees, watching Rin run around denuding the field of blooms. He'd never really understood the fascination with flowers, but it seemed to make her happy, so he'd never questioned it.

He'd known where he stood then. Known who he was, what he had to do. He'd known how the world worked, and how to bend it to his own ends. Now, he was adrift with no way back to that. He felt lost.

He didn't even know how the clothing worked, much less how to find Damia. Sesshoumaru closed his eyes, and then made for the stairs. He was _not_ going to feel sorry for himself. It would only serve to make him weaker. He had to find out about everything, find some way to pull himself out of the mood he was in.

Maybe everything would feel better when he woke up. Sesshoumaru pushed the door to Kagome's room open, and paused. She had said his armor and swords were in the closet, hadn't she? He walked over and pushed open the sliding door.

Armor bundled in a corner. Tenseiga. Toukijin.

And wrapped in a red fire rat haori…Tetsusaiga.

What did that mean? More questions, ones he didn't feel awake enough to find answers to. He rather thought he knew the answer to this particular puzzle anyway. His brother must have died.

There was no other reason he would ever have let his sword out of his hands, or his fire rat haori. Sesshoumaru couldn't even catch a whiff of his scent from the clothing, and certainly not from around the house. It had been some time since he was in the area, or since he'd worn the clothes.

Tomorrow. He'd ask tomorrow. Or next week…he felt he could easily sleep that long.

Sesshoumaru sat on the bed, and lay down with a sigh after managing to somehow get on the pajama's. He was snoozing as soon as he curled up on his side, wrapped his damp tail around himself and got comfortable.

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Kagome sat for a while longer in the kitchen sipping tea, then decided she wanted a bath. She could relax, and maybe think of something to help herself. She couldn't get rid of Sesshoumaru. She had to try and teach him what her world was like.

That, or open up the well. That would solve all her problems. Or at least, all her _immediate _ones. It would make new ones for her family. She'd never known when she started time traveling how hard it was on them to see her off, and supply her trips. Mom was fiercely independent, and would never let her children know if there was a problem.

There had to be a reason Sesshoumaru was here. She didn't think he'd actually volunteered to be sealed as a statue.

Kagome sighed. She'd deal with it after she had a bath. Of all the things in the modern world she'd missed in the past, a nice, hot bath had to be number one. Kagome smiled, and raced to collect the things from the living room she'd need, then bounded up the steps.

She stopped cold in shock when she opened the bathroom. There was water everywhere, mixed with the faint, lingering scent of wet dog. There were puddles on the floor. Most of the towels were sopping, left in a mangled heap, and soap suds decorated everything. It was going to take_ forever _to clean this mess up!

She glared at the puddles on the floor and clenched her fists.

**First thing** she was going to tell Sesshoumaru how to do once he woke up was use a shower curtain!

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_There we go…another weekly installment of story. Wow, it's long… lol. _

_Next chapter, as always, is being posted next Wednesday. Please feel free to comment! __Reviews are much appreciated._


	6. ch 5 : A Series of Unfortunate Events

**: A Series Of Unfortunate Events :**

Kagome winced as her alarm clock rang in her face. The way she saw it, there was absolutely no reason in the world it had to announce Monday with such enthusiasm. Kagome rubbed at her eyes tiredly, and winced as she felt the circles beneath them stretch, skin feeling paper brittle. It was too early…

Looked like she'd need to use a lot of cover-up today… She'd been running around all of yesterday buying clothing for Sesshoumaru. The day before, he might have just woken up, and then gone back to bed, but **she'd** spent most of the day doing things. She'd not slept much the past two nights either, trying to figure out what she'd do about the 'loss' of the statue.

Sesshoumaru had slept like a log since he'd woken up on Saturday, emerging only briefly once for food. _She_ had hardly slept at all. It was so not fair…She hadn't gotten a chance to talk to him either. Every time she went by her former room, he was asleep. The only time he'd been up for food he'd not stopped to talk. All she'd managed to say was that she had work and wouldn't be here during the week. She wished he'd wake up soon…she had to tell him things. Some were rather important. If he wasn't awake, she'd just have to get him up…

Kagome sighed and hauled herself out of the futon. Mom would be going to her part time job soon, and her grandpa still wasn't back from his trip up island. Souta had school. She had work.

That meant she had to wake Sesshoumaru up, tell him not to leave the house, and maybe leave a note for him. He could read, since she'd asked him yesterday.

Kagome grinned. He'd seemed almost insulted by the question, and an insulted Sesshoumaru getting into bed made for an interesting picture. Her face fell, slightly. He hadn't said much, not even when she complained at length about the shower curtain. She hadn't really had opportunity to tell him anything about this time, since he'd been asleep at all hours. She had to do that as soon as she could. But if he was asleep…

Food and rest did seem to have done some good. He might not look the same as she remembered, and his cheeks were still hollow, but he didn't look like the survivor of a seven year famine either.

Yet…he looked different in another way. It wasn't just the fact of physical appearance, but something else, something she couldn't quite touch, that was different from the Sesshoumaru she remembered. Was it something to do with why he'd been at the museum? She didn't know.

Kagome reached for a pair of socks, and hopped on one foot as she put them on.

Why had he been in the museum? Kagome paused. Was he lost? How had he wound up in a storage room? Come to think of it, how did he end up as a statue anyway? Now that she thought of it, he did look rather disoriented. Not that it was easy to tell with him. Maybe it was all the new things he'd seen in her era.

She'd decided last night, at around 12ish, that she just wouldn't tell anyone about the missing statue. There were no security cameras in that part of the building, and it would be at least two months before the museum did inventory in that wing again. With the way the staff was, it would probably be longer than that before the loss was even discovered. There was no way she could be caught…right? And it wasn't like she'd stolen anything, exactly…

Feeling uncomfortably like a thief, Kagome walked into the kitchen, and joined her mother for breakfast.

"I hope he'll be ok by himself. You're sure you don't want to stay home, or have me stay and look after him?" Her mother glanced at her from over breakfast, calmly eating rice with toast.

"No. He's…he doesn't really like having anyone's help. The original lone ranger." Kagome smiled from behind her glass "He knows how to cook, or at least, the basics. Actually, I think he'll sleep most of the day again. Besides, I get home early on Mondays. What could go wrong?" Kagome smiled brightly, completely forgetting about the immortal Murphy.

Mrs. Higurashi sighed, and smiled. "Well, I hope you're right. Have a good day, dear. I'll see you at six." She opened the front door, and walked down to the car, keys jangling in her hand. Kagome smiled at her mom's retreating back, and then closed the door. Just like her mom to offer to stay home, even when Kagome knew she could hardly afford to do that.

Next on her list of things to do: Wake up Souta, and then Sesshoumaru. Kagome headed off for Souta's room to get him up for school, leaving him at the kitchen table with sleepy eyes.

Sesshoumaru was lying quietly on the bed, looking as though he hadn't moved since yesterday. Kagome stepped into her room, and closed the door behind her softly. She sat down at the desk, and started pulling a few papers out of the way, looking for Shiro's bag of mixed seeds. He'd stayed in the room so far. Sesshoumaru hadn't mentioned him at all when she'd told him he would have her room for now. She fed her feathered friend, and moved a few papers around the desk.

Finally Kagome looked over at her bed. Sesshoumaru looked…odd…curled up in the new blue pajamas she'd bought for him yesterday. She'd managed to find a few things on sale he might like better than jeans, when he finally got out of bed. She really did hate to wake him up, but…Kagome leaned over to shake his shoulder.

Sesshoumaru jolted awake, and had her hand in a death-grip before she could blink, gold eyes blurred with sleep. Kagome stared at him and slowly pulled her hand away. He didn't let go.

She hadn't thought of how he might react to being woken up, had she? She winced slightly as claws inched closer to breaking the skin on her wrists.

Next time, she'd just have to throw a pillow at his head…

"Mind letting me go?" Kagome peeled his fingers off her hand delicately. He seemed to be more awake, and didn't resist, letting go at last. Kagome resisted the urge to massage her wrist. "I woke you up to let you know you'll be alone in the house today…we talked about it yesterday if you'll remember."

Sesshoumaru nodded slowly, still looking slightly confused.

Kagome paid no attention and plowed over top of anything he might have said. She had to get her rear in gear and catch a bus as of _now_. "I left a whole bunch of noodles downstairs if you get hungry, and a note on the table on how to cook in case you can't remember. I'll be back early this afternoon around three, so you should be fine." She got up from the desk, and walked to the door f her room. "See you later. Be good!" She smiled brightly and headed downstairs.

Sesshoumaru shook his head slowly as the distant sound of Kagome herding Souta out the front door, before leaving herself, came through the floor. He sniffed. Be good? What was that supposed to mean? This was too early for thinking…

He couldn't remember what he'd been dreaming when she woke him up just now, but it hadn't been good. Something about being a statue again…he didn't want to think about it now. He shivered slightly, and opened the window. No more dusty, tiny, airless rooms…

No doubt he would keep thinking about it. One didn't just forget a few centuries of imprisonment a couple of days after being freed. But he hoped that wasn't the case. He would** love** to forget that…or at least, forget the details. Some of them were blurry, others indescribably vague. And others were far too painfully fresh, clear as cutting crystal.

He didn't want to forget about revenge, but it would heaven to forget some things…

Sometimes, he'd woken up alone for a few seconds before sleeping again. He'd been frightened to think he might still be in that room. Or worse. Sesshoumaru had feared very little before, and that was still so. But he feared that room, and the thickening dust. The slow decay of centuries of insomnia…Sesshoumaru looked out the window, putting his head outside slightly, surveying the early morning.

He was _not_ going to let himself dwell on this now that there was nothing to distract him. Surely he had better self discipline than that.

He rested his head on his hand, and blinked at the bright sunlight. He'd missed the green of outside so much in that hellish little room. He wanted to go out, and just sit under the tree, and pretend that nothing had ever happened. A shame he couldn't go out today. He'd have to see about fixing that problem soon.

He looked at the sparrow sleeping in a wire house, and thought of how the birds had sounded in spring. He'd never thought much of them, until he'd been without so long. He didn't mind the bird being there…but he didn't really like him being in the cage. Cages were wrong.

It grated, having to seek a human's permission to go outside. That was a kind of confinement as well. Even though he knew why it was necessary, it was still the worst thing about this new world. He wanted to be free to do as he pleased. He always had before, and it was hard to accept that that was no longer true.

Sesshoumaru frowned out the window. He'd seen that particular tree before when it was years younger. It had been decorated with his brother back then, though Inuyasha wasn't there now. He still hadn't asked Kagome how his brother died. He was pretty sure that he was dead. How else had his clothing and sword ended up tucked away in Kagome's closet?

He might dislike his brother, and he might even hate him on occasion for being given what Sesshoumaru thought of as his, but there was no reason for him to keep on grousing about him if he was dead. The dead didn't care. He knew that all too well.

Sometimes, the living didn't care either.

Sesshoumaru's stomach rattled, and he got up in search of food. Again. It seemed all he'd done was eat since Kagome brought him here. He didn't eat this much, normally…

Sesshoumaru padded down the hallway, admiring the elegant painting hanging on the wall and then walked onto the kitchen's cold floor, nails clicking. He looked at the cupboards, and then at the rest of the room with interest. Kagome had shown him where she kept the ramen before, but he had no idea what was in the rest of the room.

Once he'd eaten, perhaps he'd take a look. Sesshoumaru had always been a curious person, and once he'd decided he would look, he was going to look. Having made up his mind to do so later, he opened the lower cupboard and pulled out a nearly full box of ramen.

Water…where was the kettle? Ah, here it was. Sesshoumaru filled it and turned it on, then sat down to wait, mildly pleased he had managed to start making breakfast for himself.

He smiled slightly. What would Rin have thought of this new world he found himself in? He could see her now, running out the door in bare feet to climb the tree in the yard. She'd loved climbing trees, even though he'd ended up helping her down on more than one occasion.

She'd always been smiling. Even when she was in danger, she'd been able to look on the bright side…

Sesshoumaru jerked in surprise as something ran down the length of his nose. What…?

Tears.

A Taiyoukai didn't weep. He'd had that beaten into him since he was a year old, a child barely able to walk. He had been told he was ice, and that he must never cry again. He was an island, aloof, distanced from the rest of the world. His tears of ice never fell. There was no reason for salty water to even be there, lurking behind his eyelids. No reason.

So why now? There was no cause for this. Why would he do something that so clearly demonstrated a loss of face? It served no purpose. Weeping was a pointless endeavor. It was weak, and showed nothing but his lack of self control.

Sesshoumaru flicked the water out of his eyes, angry with himself. He couldn't afford to lose control like this, especially now. He couldn't allow himself to be weakened, no matter that no one else was in the house. He was here, and he'd seen them. That was enough. He couldn't understand how he'd started to weep without knowing it. He could barely even remember the last time he'd shamed himself like that. And then, he had been partially excused due to youth. There were no excuses, not now.

He got up and paced, strangely full of energy. This had to have been the first time since he woke up that he'd felt anything other than dead tired and hungry. Why was he so agitated? Why the tears?

He didn't know, and he could ask no one. Even had his pride allowed it, no one but he himself knew the answers to those questions. And he wasn't so sure about the second part of that thought anyway. He didn't know.

Maybe if he knew the riddle behind Rin's smile, he would be able to answer those questions. Which would never happen, now. She was gone. She wasn't going to get stuck in the tree outside and need a hand down. She wasn't here to argue with Jaken over how to cook fish, or to laugh in wonderment about flying above the clouds.

He'd never said goodbye, not really. He hated saying goodbye. It was a harsh word, imbued with the promise of never again. But not saying it was worse.

He shook his head to clear it. He was getting soft and sentimental, foolish. Rash. If having Rin here meant for her an eternity in the dark before freedom, he didn't want her with him. Even Damia and her ilk deserved a relatively quick death over that…maybe. He wasn't so sure about her. Or Mesau.

He really was going soft. Just like his father. Next, he'd fall in love with some human and die for his trouble. Die for a mere mortal's love. It was inconceivable.

He looked out the window over the sink, and blinked at the smells filtering in. This new world reeked of something he'd never caught wind of before. He didn't know what it was, but it was everywhere. Almost like the smoke of a campfire, mixed with the tang of iron. (Air pollution) Whatever it was, it irritated his nose no end. It _stank_.

He finally stopped pacing and elected to stand next to the kettle, watching it avidly. What was taking it so long? Why wasn't it boiling?

His stomach rumbled just thinking about food of any kind, even noodles. He'd have given his other arm along with half his tail for any kind of meat to appear this instant. Raw, cooked, deer, rabbit…

Beep. The kettle belched out a cloud of steam, and he leaned forwards a little, calm on the outside as ever. He took pride in being an enigma to all, in not letting his thoughts casually play across his face. Perhaps it was no surprise he'd become a mystery even to himself.

He filled up three cups and set the kettle to boiling again. He allowed himself a small smirk of triumph before starting in on the food. The simple pleasure of eating something drove out the confusing flood of earlier thoughts.

Sesshoumaru finished just as the kettle boiled again. He alternated between eating and refilling the kettle for more food, and when he sat back in his chair he was surprised to see most of the crate of ramen gone. Had he really been that hungry?

Interesting. He tilted his head up, and looked at the cupboards. What would really be interesting would be to find out more about the contents of all those drawers and cupboards.

He thought he smelled spice from the left, familiar and foreign scents blended together into one pleasant odor. That seemed as good a place to start as any.

Sesshoumaru opened up the cupboard and gazed at the rows of jars, five deep, each with a label and a different spice inside. So many of them…this family must be quite wealthy to afford all these. He sniffed at the one jar closest to him, and sneezed. Bad idea…the spice tickled his nose too much. It was stronger than he was used to.

Above the spices were other things, boxes, each labeled neatly. Nothing really interesting. He closed that one and looked at the next, puzzling over the cooking utensils he found. What possible purpose could a piece of metal with holes poked in its sharpened sides serve? (Cheese grater) It made a poor weapon, and he couldn't see how it was used in cooking. If they boiled water like that it would drain out…even he knew that much, poor cook as he was.

He looked at the rest of the kitchen, frowning whenever something he didn't understand came to light. This happened far more frequently than he liked. He had a lot of questions to ask about this place to add to the long, and rapidly growing, list in his head.

Sesshoumaru sighed almost inaudibly, and moved onto the last cupboard. It was maddening to find all these things, and not know what they were for.

He opened the door, and looked at more boxes. A sweet scent, overlaid with bitterness, wafted out and he inhaled, wondering what it was. He'd never smelled anything quite like it.

He pulled out the medium sized box, and set it on the table before opening it. A funny metal tube of some sort was on top, and a bag of something white and powdery labeled 'icing sugar'. Not knowing what those were he put them aside for later, when he could ask questions. He then looked at the packages wrapped individually in paper at the bottom. Whatever he'd smelled was in there…Sesshoumaru lifted one out, and shook the square object inside out onto the table.

A brown brick, smelling much stronger now it was in the open air, turned out to be the contents. He ran a claw down the middle, peeling away a strip of the soft material. He licked his fingers and his eyes widened at the taste.

He had no idea what the stuff was, but it was better than anything he could remember eating before! It was sweet, with just enough of a bitter flavor to make it perfect…Sesshoumaru flipped the paper wrapping over, and mentally shrugged when he realized there wasn't a label. Oh well. Most likely, he wouldn't have known what the label meant anyway, so it didn't matter.

He stared at the rest of the box of paper packages, and dumped them out. There were a dozen, thirteen if you counted the one he'd already unwrapped. Sesshoumaru broke the previously unwrapped, palm sized brick in half and held part in his palm, watching in fascination as it grew warm and melted around the edges. He ate it, and blinked. It really was the best thing he'd ever had…surely humans couldn't have made this. There had to be youkai still around in this time, perhaps hidden, or living apart from humans.

It was disturbing to think they were gone. Almost as disturbing to think they had hidden themselves among humans. But if they weren't concealed, then where were they?

Sesshoumaru polished off the rest of the sweet tasting, square he'd found, and then looked at the box. He decided he'd take it up to 'his' room, and he'd ask about what it was later. He was pretty sure Kagome wouldn't mind him eating it, since the one time he'd come down to the kitchen for food she'd been standing over him, practically _stuffing_ him with cooking. (Mind you, he hadn't objected.) It wasn't as thought there were many packages, and none were very big.

He didn't really care whether Kagome approved or not. That reasoned out, Sesshoumaru decided that he'd go upstairs to have a look at his armour. Normally, he'd have Jaken around to polish it for him, but since the imp wasn't here, he'd do it himself. Sesshoumaru picked up the box with its twelve remaining packages, and headed back upstairs.

He set the box on the desk beside the bird house, and then dragged the armour out of Kagome's closet. The bird peered at him sleepily, then dismissed him as unimportant and went back to sleep.

He'd been right about the armor, at least. There was quite a lot of rust on parts of it, and he could tell hours of polishing would be needed. He almost sighed at the long task in front of him, but stopped himself. Since when had he not done what needed doing?

Besides….what else could he do, except go through the house? It seemed rather empty to look at all the mystery objects around Kagome's home. He'd rather do something familiar, something he understood.

It was better than going off on long, circular trains of thought, or berating himself for being in this position.

Even if he did know more, there still wasn't much to do. He admitted it. He was lost. He didn't know what he wanted, other than to get back at Damia and her pet human. For what they might do…had already done…he needed more information.

The search for power, so long his only pursuit, was empty. What good had power ever really done him? The one time he had really, really needed it, it had done nothing for Rin. It wasn't something he wanted now.

Sesshoumaru looked around the room for a polishing cloth. There was a notable lack thereof, so he sat and thought for a minute. What about a towel? Those seemed to work…

Sesshoumaru walked out to the bathroom to get a towel for polishing, and then sat down by the window. He pulled over the box of sweet things, and ate one absently.

How could mere humans make something that tasted like this? It was hard to believe, but it was probably true. Astonishing.

Sesshoumaru got down to work, and spent the early afternoon working away steadily on the accumulated rust, munching all the while on the unlabeled packages.

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Kagome held onto the metal hand bars on the bus as it pulled up to the curb down the street from her house, humming to herself. Today had been one nervous breakdown after another. First, she'd been frozen stiff while the supervisor gave her today's inventory. She knew it was irrational to think the museum would suspect her, or even know of their loss. There were no security cameras in that part of the building, and no one had seen her. No one could _possibly_ know. But…

She still managed to break out in a cold sweat, and had given herself a headache by lunch. Even without worrying about the museum, she worried about Sesshoumaru. Would he really be fine on his own? She trusted him to stay inside. He'd given his word to do so until she said otherwise, but there was still plenty he could do to get into trouble.

What if he didn't unplug the kettle? Or burnt down the house…? Kagome had scolded herself throughout the day for having those thoughts. Now that the shrine had come into view around the corner, she felt relived to see it still standing and unchanged.

She got off the bus and walked home, letting herself in quietly. Souta would be home soon, but her mom was working till six, so she wouldn't be home for another three hours.

"Sesshoumaru? Where are you?" There was no answer, so Kagome assumed he was asleep again. She wandered into the kitchen, and frowned. A cupboard door had been left open, and a few things were on the table beside the instructions on how to use the kettle. Obviously, Sesshoumaru had been exploring. Kagome clenched her fists.

He had some nerve, going through everything! What if he'd gone through everything in her room! Ooh!

If he _had_ gone through all the stuff in her closet, or the drawers full of clothing, she was going to strangle him with his own tail! There were things in there, such as her journal, not to mention things he might break, that she didn't want him into. Plus…what girl wanted a guy rummaging in her bras? Even one who probably wouldn't know what they were…Ooohhh…

She stalked over to the table, and her eyebrows wrinkled at the icing sugar bag, and the tube of icing for cakes. What had he been doing in the old baking box? The icing was years old and probably moldy. She tossed it out, and then picked up the paper wrapper lying beside. She held it loosely between her fingers, thinking. What had been in it? He must have done something with the contents, or maybe the paper had just been in the box….

Kagome's eyes widened as she finally remembered what had been in the wrapper. A hundred grams of un-sweetened baking chocolate.

Sesshoumaru was a dog youkai. Dogs could die if they had too much chocolate. Or end up really sick. She definitely didn't want either one of those. She hoped it wouldn't have done anything to him…he wasn't a dog, so it might be perfectly fine…Kagome bolted up the stairs to her room, a feeling of premonition running though her veins.

She stared at the armour sitting on her bed. Looked like he'd been cleaning. He wasn't there now.

Where was he? In the bathroom? Souta's room? Kagome dashed back along the hall to the bathroom.

She ripped the door open, and didn't see him. Where…?

No, wait. There was just the edge of a tail peeking out from around the corner, from behind the door… Kagome turned around and went back, hoping that he was ok. She felt the panicky adrenalin in her take a sharp jump upwards as she moved the door aside to look at the bathtub, and caught sight of his pale face. It was almost like chalk, magenta stripes a vivid hue against the sickly white of his cheeks.

In a glance she took in what had happened, mind whirling furiously in every direction and none. He was in the corner, slumped against the bathtub. Kagome rushed over, covering her nose and stopping as the smell hit her. He'd been sick in the bathtub. There was a towel lying on the floor. He didn't look good at all.

His eyes were half closed, and the pupils glassy, staring. The end of his tail twitched nervously as she ventured closer. She stepped over his awkwardly long legs and cautiously waved her hand in front of him, hoping that he'd wake up and knowing that it wouldn't happen. He didn't respond to any of the movements she made. Oh no…this couldn't be happening…wasn't happening…

Kagome sat back on her heels, stomach churning, and ran to Souta's room. He had a computer. She could find something out. It was all she could think of. She didn't know anything about what was going on, and the only thing that held still in her mind long enough was vain hope that Google Japan knew more than she. She hit the on switch, and ran back to her own room while it booted up.

She didn't know anything about how chocolate affected dogs…apart from the fact that it made them throw up, and if there was enough, it could kill them. She'd never even _owned_ a dog! She had no idea what was going on…she could at least find out something. Unless dog youkai reacted differently enough to render the information useless…oh no…what should she do? What should she…?

She'd see how much he'd eaten, to start. Kagome seized on the idea and bolted back towards her room.

She looked at the small pile of wrappers by the armor, and blanched. One, two…twelve. Thirteen, if you counted the one downstairs. How lucky for her. She dry washed her hands nervously, and dashed back to the bathroom. Sesshoumaru hadn't moved since she left. She propped him up, not knowing quite what to do. He was just sitting there, eyes half closed and glazed over.

Sesshoumaru mumbled something, and he shivered against Kagome. His neck seemed floppy, rubbery, as though a string holding it up had been cut. She gulped, and held him loosely. His hand twitched slightly. Kagome gulped as a horrible idea occurred to her. What if chocolate gave dogs seizures? She had heard somewhere that the best thing if someone was having a seizure was simply to give them room, and not put anything in their mouths. She hoped it was right…

"…Feel…sick…" Kagome heard his mumbles, and hurriedly moved his head over the bathtub.

A few minutes passed, Kagome half propping him up over the bathtub, eyes wide and still trying to think of something she could do. He wasn't sick, so it must have been a more general statement… or at least, Kagome hoped so. She didn't mind seeing blood as much as some of the other fluids in peoples bodies.

She heard the computer beep from Souta's room, and slowly eased Sesshoumaru to the floor. She backed out, and then ran to the computer. There had to be information somewhere. There had to be. Had to be…vaguely, she knew she was on the edge of panic, but knowing that didn't make it any better, not at all…

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_Hot…so hot…he was boiling in the dark. He couldn't see anything…he couldn't move, either. Phantom music drifted on invisible currents, and he heard a child's laughter. No, it wasn't laughing. She was screaming…it stopped abruptly, cut off._

_Something wet ran past his hands, and he knew what it was…If he crawled forwards, he knew what would be there, the same as the day he'd come home. Scent hit him, nearly bowling him over. Irondeathbloodstink, enough to fill a small lake...His eyes didn't work anymore, but he KNEW. He tried shrinking back, but it didn't work. It was still there, and he…he was glued to the spot. He didn't know why, only that he was._

_He was once more trapped as still as stone, fighting a loosing battle for freedom. He couldn't move, couldn't open his eyes…trapped in the dark, alone in that antechamber of hell…_

_The wet stickiness streamed above his hands, and became a flood, rising over his arms, covering his head. It hissed and steamed, accusing him. It was his fault…he was drowning…drowning in the dark, drowning in her blood…Rin…_

_Gone._

_It was gone, replaced by cold and the darkness, murkiness at the bottom of a pond. Koi gazed mournfully at his thrashing, tiny form._

_He struggled to stay afloat, his oversized and waterlogged tail weighing him down. The fish scattered, and he thrashed harder, a child, a drowning child…_

_Someone pulled him out of the water fountain, and wiped the water out of his eyes. He couldn't see his nurse's face…he'd forgotten it. After all these years, he'd forgotten it…he felt sick again, woozy. _

_If only he could remember…but he didn't** want **to remember…_

_Some things were best left alone_

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Kagome scanned the internet quickly, cursing the slow connection.

"1 ounce per 9 pounds of body weight for Baker's chocolate…So, for example, 2 oz. of Baker's chocolate can cause great risk to a 15 lb. dog…Xanthenes affect the nervous system, cardiovascular system and peripheral nerves…"

Kagome looked at the page blankly. What was 'oz.'? It wasn't the wizard of Oz. She felt an urge to giggle uncontrollably. Damn imperial system. She used metric…and what the hell was theobromine? It didn't give her any information at all, other than the fact Sesshoumaru had eaten the worst thing possible. And that it apparently affected the nervous system. Fat lot of good this was doing her.

Damnit, why wasn't there any practical information here? Everywhere she looked, it was all 'Prevent it, and if it happens, take the pet to a vet.' Useless to her, since she couldn't take him to a hospital _or_ a vet. She didn't dare spend too long searching. Nothing was coming up, so it probably wouldn't do much good to continue looking. Kagome went back to the bathroom, and watched as the tip of Sesshoumaru's tail twitched.

She felt helpless, unable to do anything. She had no idea what to do, apart from get him back into bed

If only she could take him to a hospital…

Hospital. Doctor. Hojo…

She could phone Hojo.

Kagome stared at wall, then at Sesshoumaru. It would mean she was telling someone. She would have to tell Hojo the truth, all of it.

He might hate her afterwards for the lie. He must have spent a small fortune on gifts while she was 'sick'. He might not believe her…no, he'd have to. Once he was here, Sesshoumaru was evidence enough on his own. She'd just have tell him to come quick and not give details that would turn him off. Desperate times, desperate measures. If she didn't do something, he might die, and she would not let that happen. It would be a relief to finally tell someone.

At last, she could just drop the lie in front of him…would be forced to, in fact. She might never have said anything if she wasn't faced with this situation. She couldn't just let Sesshoumaru die in her care, not when getting someone who knew more than she did could have saved his life. She couldn't stand having his death on her hands.

She'd just have to tell Hojo then.

Kagome bolted for her purse, and fumbled for the cell phone. She waited anxiously as it rang, then Hojo picked up.

"Hi, Hojo speaking."

Kagome sighed in relief. "Thank goodness you're in. Please…can…can you come to the shrine right now? I've got someone very sick here, and I can't take him to the hospital."

Hojo blinked. She was asking him to go play doctor…? He was only a first year medical student for crying out loud! What would he know about helping someone who was sick? Unless it was something like a broken arm…he might be able to deal with something like that…maybe. He doubted it would be that simple. Kagome sounded pretty worried.

"What's wrong with him?" She'd have said if it was Souta, so it must be some other guy. Jealousy burned slightly. Some other guy…

Hojo took a deep breath. For all he knew, it was Souta or her Grandpa. There was no reason to think like this.

Kagome bit her lip. She had to tell Hojo, so he'd at least know something about what he was getting into. She couldn't give too much away at first, or he might get skeptical and not come. "He's…allergic to chocolate." Wow. Brilliant lying…she really was way too good at spinning lies though her teeth by now. "And he ate a whole bunch of it. I didn't know!" she got out. She was still kicking herself for leaving Sesshoumaru alone. He might not have burnt down the house like she'd been half afraid he might, but he'd still managed to land in plenty of trouble. Must be a family trait, that. Inuyasha had always been in trouble…

She sighed. Sesshoumaru obviously didn't know, or he wouldn't have eaten the chocolate. It was her fault.

Hojo stared at the phone. Something didn't ring true about this…"Why can't he go to a hospital?"

Kagome fidgeted, stomach nearly imploding with butterflies. "I…please come! I **will **tell you…but…oh, just…" Something crashed upstairs, and Kagome ran back to the bathroom, praising whoever invented mobile phones. "Shit…please, just come soon!" She hung up on Hojo, and scurried into the bathroom again. Not the best closing comment, but it would have to do.

Sesshoumaru had kicked over the wastebasket, and was still moving spasmodically. He moaned softly, almost on the edge of hearing. Kagome made up her mind. She had to get him back into her room, and lying down. _Now_. That was the only thing she knew how to do. If she could. He wasn't exactly being cooperative right now. She doubted she could even **drag** him to her room, the way he was starting to spasm.

She bit her nail, eyes radiating worry. She moved the wastebasket out of the way, and any other sharp things. She left the towels, figuring they wouldn't hurt if he bumped into them. It was all she could think of. What could she do? She didn't know anything…what if he died, or…or…what could she do? Anything at all?

Nothing?

No, that wasn't true.

Hadn't she healed Shiro when she first found him? He'd been nearly dead then. Couldn't she at least try calming Sesshoumaru down? She winced as he curled up on himself, eyes screwed shut.

What was happening to him? She didn't know anything about what was going on. Sesshoumaru had hardly ever shown anything of emotion or pain, from what she had seen of him. He must be really in pain…or starting to lose it…she knew how to deal with some poisons, and lesser wounds, but this?

She could see the results of what had happened, but she didn't have a clue how to deal with them…conventionally. She worried her lip and clamped down on the butterflies tearing at her stomach.

What about the other way?

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_The room flickered, and he curled up against the pain in his stomach. He shouldn't have eaten that…stuff…what had happened? Pain thrilled along his middle, and he curled in tighter. He could tell, dimly, that he had fallen on his side. He couldn't really control himself. He was halfway in his own world of flickering and white, and only dimly did the real world intrude._

_It was hard enough to tell what was happening, much less make himself keep still. He was making a horrible scene…he dreaded having someone from his court come in and see this. He'd be overthrown or deposed for sure. Father hadn't raised him to be like this…had someone poisoned him? Who? He'd been in negotiations with the East last week…the North? The Purists there had been getting edgy…_

_The stone flagons of the floor were ice cold, and he felt himself shivering even harder. He should not be doing this. He was Sesshoumaru, and he was not cold…Only why did he keep shivering? Poison…?_

_His arms…his legs…he felt strangely limp. As though at the next minute he could get up and fight an entire army by himself, or as though he wanted to sleep for a century. His limbs were loose, watery, and he could do __neither __of these things. He could only sit and watch from behind his own shoulder and feel for the answers in the smothering haze, try to think through the fluff._

_There was someone else here…he caught a whiff of Kagome's scent, and a wavering image of her face flashed across the dreamy, wavering room that had suddenly appeared. He wasn't in the West, he was in some strange shrine…_

_Darkness closed, even as he tried to speak, and he fell back. The pain in his middle grew worse, and he could taste the bitterness in his mouth where he'd been sick. He tried to say something, but couldn't hear his own voice._

_What was going on…?_

_Flick. The whiteness somehow…_twisted

_He stood, looking at the tree, feeling her behind him. The lady of Asano Castle. Did she still believe he had saved her father's human army? That had been entirely unintentional. _

_Did she know what deal she had made, to be standing here like this?_

"_My father's impulsiveness cannot be forgiven. Not even I can apologize enough for his actions." Did she mean her father's fear of youkai? Only to be expected. Humans feared what they did not know or control. If you cannot master it, destroy it._

_There was one other thing he remembered about her. A flute, just like another one, one he'd heard long, long ago.** She** had loved it best of all the music in the world. Could this woman play as well?_

"_A flute…"_

_She was puzzled by his words, he could tell._

"_I thought that I heard the sound of a flute" She might have made the same deal as Naraku, but she still carried the flute. Was she the woman who had once been lady here, or was she now something, some**one** else?_

"_Yes…It was this flute" She drew it slowly out of her sash, and sat back against the tree, putting it to her lips, eyes still questioning._

_Lilting sounds floated free, and it was no longer the creature sitting against the tree playing, but **her**, Mother's flute, her angry shinobue flute…_

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It was worth a shot. She couldn't lose. Kagome dodged as his tail skittered over the bathroom floor, and tried to focus on calm, trying to find that place above her heart where she'd first found her power.

It was there, just like last time. Kagome seized power eagerly in both hands, thankful for small miracles, and _shoved_ it at Sesshoumaru.

Immediately, he started to calm down, and his eyes cleared just a little.

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Soothing energy flowed around him, and he wondered where it had come from. The bathroom still wavered on the edges of his vision, but in no way was it a dream. He made himself stop shivering. There was no court to be wary of, no one else here. No angry music. He was no longer lord of the west, just…a very confused youkai.

A very _woozy_ youkai, to be more precise. Kagome hovered over him, face worried. Had it been her? He almost grimaced, but contained himself. This was intolerable, that she should see him like this…although, she had seen him when he was nothing but skin and bones…

But _not_ when he was sick. A Taiyoukai wasn't _supposed_ to be sick…

He shoved the humiliation away, and looked up. He had to know what she was doing, what was going on.

"…Kagome…? What…"

"Sh….we'll talk later. It's my fault…I should have told you not to eat just anything." She laughed humorlessly. "I suppose we're lucky you didn't decide to drink drain cleaner."

Talk later? He wanted answers _now_…but his moment of clarity was fading. "…Drain cleaner…?" Sesshoumaru was getting fuzzy headed again. He'd been dreaming, after he went into the bathroom. He'd felt sick….and he _had_ been sick….and then it went foggy…

"Later. Right now, let's get you into bed. Try and help me here…"

She bent down on one side, and supported under his arm, nearly falling over. Damn. She'd forgotten how tired healing would make her. Thank goodness moving him wasn't like last time, when he'd been a dead weight. This time, he was able to stand on his own a little and help, even if it wasn't much. She helped him across the hallway, and then put him on the bed after kicking the armor off it.

Sesshoumaru tried to do as much of walking as he could, but the sad fact was he couldn't stand on his own. He despised having to admit to himself he needed the little human's help, but if it hadn't been for her, he wouldn't have managed to get this far without resorting to crawling, and he was not going to do that if he could help it.

Sesshoumaru frowned as he heard the armor go rolling, and Kagome winced as it clanged on the floor. Probably have a new set of dents. Not her problem. Right now, the only things she was going to worry about were making herself a pot of tea so filled with caffeine it could stand up on its own, and getting Sesshoumaru looked after.

Then, she was going to get a bucket, in case he decided to throw up again.

Kagome left while he was coherent, somehow anticipating that he might not be so for long, and went to get her tea. She rather thought she'd need it. She shoed Buyo out of the hall into the living room, and went to the kitchen.

A few minutes later she came back up with the bucket and put a pot of tea down on the desk for later, along with the sugar pot from downstairs. Shiro peeped unhappily, seeming to sense that all was not well.

Sesshoumaru had dropped into an uneasy slumber, still shifting restlessly from time to time. She could tell he was hot…there was a slight sheen of sweat on his forehead. He frowned, and shifted a little, lips moving, making sounds just under the edge of hearing.

What was he saying? Kagome leaned in slightly, still worried sick. She just didn't know…

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_He was in the room…**her** room…alone. Rich hangings decorated the walls, blurry whenever he looked sideways at them. The details escaped him, as did the vague pieces of furniture. Only the burgundy carpet beneath his small feet was real. And her. She was in the corner, draped in shadows…waiting for him to start impatiently._

"_This had better be worth my time, Sesshoumaru."_

_Her time…she spent all her time with her music, and forgot he even existed. Except when she took a few hours to teach him, making it clear that it was hardly worth doing so. But maybe…_

_He cleared his voice, and started to sing the way he was taught. For her. It had to be good enough for her…maybe this time, he'd be good enough for her…even if he was only able to try. A child's voice, sung with small hopes. This time she had to approve. He wanted it so much…_

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Kagome's eyes widened as she realized he was singing quietly, voice almost too soft to hear. What could he be singing? She leaned in closer, and stared at him in shock when she heard the first few lines of a song.

Since when did he know how to sing? And when had he learned _this_ song? This was too much…the whole thing was just too overwhelming…

1 "Nen nen…kororiyo okororiyo  
Boyawa yoikoda nenneshina…

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_It had to be perfect. She didn't allow anything other than perfection. After all these years, she wouldn't even look at him unless it was **perfect**. He wanted her to look at him. He wanted her to see him, and for once, just once, smile._

_Boyano komoriwa dokoe it ta_

_Anoyama koete satoe it ta_

_He wasn't in mother's study room anymore. He was sitting with his back to a tree, watching Rin's eyes dart around the clearing. Silly girl…he almost smiled. Whatever nightmares had been lying in wait in the dream world were gone now. He was still singing, trying to get her to go back to sleep…no…_

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He twitched, and whimpered. Kagome swallowed. What was going on here? Sesshoumaru had to be dreaming…or hallucinating…

**There** was a scary thought. Sometimes chocolate could make a dog delirious…What would happen if he started hallucinating he had to destroy Tokyo? Kagome shivered. She wouldn't be able to stop him if he tried to leave the house in the grips of some fevered dream. But…

When did he get to be such a good singer? She'd sung in choir a few times, and she wasn't bad. But he had it down to a fine art. Every note was true, and rang out beautifully, for all the whispered volume and the harsh overtones. It somehow didn't go with the cold hearted lord.

She was astonished he knew these words. Her own mother had sung this lullaby to her a few times, though in slightly different words. This was an older version of the same song.

Sato…no miyage ni…nani morata

Denden…taikoni…sho no fue…

…Sho no fue…"

Sesshoumaru jerked his head before stiffening, eyes wide and unseeing. He gripped the sheets with his hand, making holes in the fabric, half rising. He looked straight ahead, seeing some other place. Kagome jumped in surprise as he moved, and tried to push him back down. "Stop that…come on, you have to help me here. I need you to lie down till Hojo gets here…"

She tried calming him again her miko's power, but it didn't work. He just wasn't letting her help him. She sat back, even more tired than before. "Please calm down…" She pleaded with him, not sure it would work. She was scared… Sesshoumaru finally let himself be pushed down, still not seeing the room around him. His eyes closed.

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_Rin. There was no Rin, no clearing. _

_Just her. The room, its burgundy walls somehow shinny and wet looking. It always made him think her room was the inner chamber of an immense heart, swallowing him up. One day, he would vanish and never return from these corridors._

_She gave him a familiar, haughty glare. "Not good enough"_

_He hung his head in shame, short hair covering his eyes as it fell out of its ponytail. It wasn't long enough to stay in place, yet. He held his tiny arms tightly at his sides, shamed. No, it wasn't good enough. He was a pathetic excuse compared to her. He clenched his fists. He had to try harder…why?_

_Why did he do this? Why didn't she care? He had spent months on this…all the time he'd spent on this moment had come to nothing now._

_Why didn't she care? Was he of less import to her than the newest addition to the court musicians? Mother…_

_He had tried so hard…why? "I…tried…_

"…I…tried so hard this time…mother…why won't…you…" He was mumbling now, but Kagome didn't hear. The door bell had just rung. She got up and ran downstairs again, then jerked the door open.

Souta blinked as the door was yanked open from inside to reveal a very flustered Kagome.

He looked puzzled as Kagome's face fell. "What's going on?"

"Oh…that **idiot**…" Kagome's hands clenched into fists. "Sesshoumaru went and explored the kitchen. You know what he found? He found a whole bunch of baking chocolate to eat!"

Souta still didn't look like he understood. "Does that mean he's been hyper all afternoon?" He smiled and laughed a little. Sesshoumaru seemed too serious to him. The one time he'd been downstairs on Sunday, he hadn't smiled once. Hyper youkai had to be worse than _ten_ little kids on sugar…

"**No**. You remember he's a dog youkai, right? He reacted the way a dog would, and he's sick. I got home and discovered he'd thrown up in the bathtub, and right now I think he's hallucinating or something…" Kagome left Souta with wide eyes, and went back upstairs at a run "Tell me when Hojo gets here, would you?"

Souta blinked, shocked. Sesshoumaru must be _really_ bad if she'd called a friend over. He pulled off his shoes and ran to dump his backpack in his room. He glanced at the information Kagome had pulled up on his computer, then went to help her. He peered into the room with round, scared eyes.

Kagome was trying to keep Sesshoumaru from rolling off the bed. He'd curled himself into a ball, and was in danger of spilling onto the floor. He looked awful. He was shaking, skin pale and clammy from some inner struggle. Souta helped her move him back from the edge, then decided he'd go help his sister by cleaning out the bath tub. She didn't need to deal with that mess on top of everything else.

He left his sister pouring tea, and Sesshoumaru shaking on the bed in a miserable ball. Sometimes, his family was just too weird. He was pretty sure none of his friends had ever had a sick youkai throw up in their bathroom.

The things Kagome did…one day, someone had to take care of her. She was always looking after someone, and never herself. He tried to help, but he couldn't do enough. He'd done everything he could to cheer her up after she arrived home with the message Inuyasha was dead, the well was accidentally sealed, and the jewel complete.

At least this was something he could help her with.

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He'd just finished clearing out the tub when the doorbell rang. Souta ran downstairs, and opened the door to see Hojo on the doorstep, looking serious.

"Where's Kagome?"

"She's up in her room with…"

Hojo pushed past Souta, and went straight for her room.

"…with Sesshouamru." Souta finished, and grimaced. Hojo must be pretty scared if he wasn't even takeing the time to hear…

Hojo took the stairs two at a time, dashing towards the open door of Kagome's room. He could hear a low shuffling of covers. Kagome had sounded pretty frazzled over the phone. Almost like someone was dying because their allergies were making them choke to death.

Hojo reached the door to her room, and dashed in, panting slightly. He stopped cold as he took in the person on the bed, Kagome kneeling to one side looking worried. Yuka 's description rose up in his mind.

_White_ hair. Half closed _gold_ eyes.

Inuyasha!

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_1Copied the song from a website, somewhere. I'm no songwriter, especially in Japanese; I'm only acquainted with the basics of speech. It's old enough to fit the timeline, I think. It all works. (grin)_

_And, of course, I decided to cut the ch off there. Lol. Yes, evil. But it was getting way too long anyway…16 pages in size 10 times new roman font. Wow. 0.0 Next chapter goes up next Wednesday, as per the norm. (slightly evil grin) Unless the reviews are eloquent enough to persuade me, of course…_


	7. ch 6 : The Truth

**: The Truth :**

(Last time)

Hojo took the stairs two at a time, dashing towards the open door of Kagome's room. He could hear a low shuffling of covers. Kagome had sounded pretty frazzled over the phone. Almost like someone was dying because their allergies were making them choke to death.

Hojo reached the door to her room, and dashed in, panting slightly. He stopped cold as he took in the person on the bed, Kagome kneeling to one side looking worried. Yuka 's description rose up in his mind.

_White_ hair. Half closed _gold_ eyes.

Inuyasha!

(And we continue…)

Hojo stared for a split second, mind working on overtime. Yuka had told him what Inuyasha looked like. How many people had gold eyes or hair like that? Kagome had _lied_ to him! Inuyasha wasn't gone, he was **here**, and she was asking_ him_ to help him…. She'd gone and taken that two timing bastard in, and broken up with Hojo to do it!

It was his fault…Inuyasha's fault! Hojo's vision crawled with red, and he hardly realized he'd left the doorframe until he had his hands around the white-haired bastard's neck.

"I'm gonna kill you! You hurt her… Inuyasha, you…"

Kagome realized what had happened the moment Hojo lunged at Sesshoumaru, murder in his eyes.

"Hojo! Stop! Get _off_ of him! Stop it! That isn't Inuyasha!" She tried to pull him off, Souta coming up from behind her to help. Crap, why did this have to happen to her when she was so tired already…?

Even Sesshoumaru seemed to have realized he was in danger. He clawed at Hojo's arm feebly, blindly, before he got a grip on Hojo's twisting wrist. He scrabbled at Hojo's arm, and ripped him off, tossing him into the wall beside the door without even looking at the enraged human, still half curled into a miserable ball of clammy skin and matted fur. Hojo bounced back onto the floor, then scrambled up, and tried to pounce on Sesshoumaru again.

The youkai kept his eyes shut tightly, and shook, muttering once more below the threshold of human hearing as Kagome and Souta caught and held Hojo back, yelling.

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_He looked back at the little girl who'd found him, tried to help him when he was injured before. He didn't know why she was following him, after he'd revived her. Was it gratitude for her life? Surely not that…she didn't act as though she even remembered dying. _

_He sat and watched her sleeping in the shadow of the trees…a slumbering puzzle. He wondered if she'd keep following him. Why was she doing so?_

_He'd never encountered another human like her. Most of them ran, or stood their ground in fear. None ever helped him without clear gain for themselves. He leaned back and slept…_

_…and he was in the clearing once again, facing **he**r…'…can't move anything but my head…Damia! Mesau…what did you do?' Sesshoumaru bared his teeth in a furious snarl. What had her pet human done to him?_

"_I won't allow you to sit on the fence anymore! You're killing us, not doing anything! Can you not see what is happening! If you won't, then **I will**. You will die, so that the rest of us can do what must be done!" Damia laughed coldly at him, and gestured for Mesau to finish him off. The miko walked forwards, killing scroll in her hands. He watched her come, furious…why had he let this happen? What was Damia doing, spouting that Purist nonsense? **Killing** them…was she blind? **She** would kill them! Bloody Purists… _

_She would kill him. _

_That didn't matter, so much. Death came for everyone. In his life, he'd seen a lot of death, and had caused it more often than not. But Rin had died! It was his fault…he should have known he wouldn't be able to protect her forever. He should have known to let her go…_

_He watched Mesau come. He knew nothing about her, but Damia would be an easy opponent in a head on fight. Or she had been. Not with this miko's help…coward… Her beliefs meant nothing. To betray him this way… Killing children over politics…_

_Light flared as the fluttering piece of paper touched his frozen skin, and pain ran through him. The hypocrites…_

_Everything went strange. Was he dead yet?_

_Black._

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Sesshoumaru shook harder, and curled up into a ball of tension on the bed covers. Kagome winced. He was getting worse….she had to get Hojo to calm down! Sesshoumaru…. He was still yelling at Sesshoumaru, trying to get to him.

"He's not Inuyasha! He's his brother! I would never lie like that!"

Kagome and Souta restrained Hojo, once he'd fought his way back on his feet, both shouting at him. He kept trying to get to 'Inuyasha'. It took a lot of effort, but through all the yelling, he finally seemed to understand.

"It's…he's not Inuyasha?"

"**No!** He's Sesshoumaru. Inuyasha's brother!"

Hojo looked slightly sheepish as he stopped struggling and held still, slumped over. Kagome and Souta let go of him, and stepped back cautiously. Kagome rubbed her forehead.

Why her, and why today?

"I…you don't see many people with white hair and gold eyes. I…I didn't think…" Red crept along his face, and Hojo looked at his feet. One of his socks needed mending, he noticed. He had been so **stupid**, doing that… what had he been thinking?

He hadn't been thinking…

Kagome sighed. "It's ok Hojo. It's my fault. I should have told you." She put her hand on his shoulder. "Inuyasha…he's dead, Hojo. I saw him die." Maybe that would shock him enough to clam him down.

Souta looked at Kagome. "You never told us you saw him die."

Kagome's eyes closed. "I know I didn't."

Hojo stared at her. She had seen him _die_? He hadn't heard _anything_ about Inuyasha – or any other young person- in the papers obituaries recently. When had this happened? He felt _horrible_…both for doing that to her, and for mistaking this sick person …Sesshoumaru? …for Inuyasha. He felt terribly guilty for having attacked the man in bed. His face burned fiercer, and Hojo's shoulders collapsed in on themselves, trying to make his taller frame small. He felt small, small and stupid. Oh gods…

Kagome lifted her head and opened her eyes determinedly. Not now. "We can talk later. Sesshoumaru needs help now."

"Ah…yes…" _Anything_ to fill the awkward silence. Hojo walked over to the bed, trying to forget the past few minutes. Floor, please swallow me now. Inuyasha was dead? And poor Kagome had seen him die? What an awful thing to have happen…he'd never _dreamed_ how much he had to have hurt her whenever he brought him up. Especially when she'd broken up with him. He felt ashamed of himself. He'd never have thought he'd go crazy like that. He wasn't a violent person at all. Hojo blushed harder, hoping Kagome wouldn't see the pink inching up his neck.

How could he have done that? Kagome was already under enough stress. Her eyes had showed that plainly, though she'd tried to hide it. How could he go and do that to her? Hojo's neck colored further. He'd been so _stupid…_

But…why hadn't she told him? It would have made things so much easier…surely it wouldn't have hurt to tell him that Inuyasha was dead when he talked about him last week? He would find out later, he supposed. He hoped. She had **better** have an explanation…

But right now, he had work to do. He peered at the odd looking man curled up on the bed. Now that he looked closer, this Sesshoumaru almost looked like a woman. Certainly the eyeliner gave that impression. He wondered why the guy had tattoos on his face. Odd…But apart from that, he wasn't in terribly good shape. He was too skinny, almost anorexic. He didn't look healthy at all.

He was even missing an arm, though that had to be an old injury, or maybe a birth defect. He had also managed to tangle himself up in some sort of fluffy blanket. It would have to go somewhere out of the way first. "You said he ate baking chocolate even though he's got cocoa allergies?" Hojo didn't know what was going on. The guy didn't have any problems breathing, and that was usually why people died when they had an allergic reaction. It looked more like he had a high fever, actually…

Eating the very stuff you were allergic to was idiocy…if that was what had happened.

Sesshoumaru was panting slightly, and muttering...Hojo leaned, curious. This wasn't like anything he'd ever heard of.

"…stop…it…murdering…killed her…don't do this…"

Hojo straightened and looked hard at the bed. What was that supposed to mean? Murder? Either he didn't know something, or the guy read **way** too many mystery books. A gang problem? It would explain the secrecy…

Or Sesshoumaru was dreaming…weird dream…. Or maybe Hojo was the one dreaming, and this was all a nightmare. He'd wake up any minute now…he **hoped **he would, anyway… Had Inuyasha, and his brother, been in a gang? If Kagome was mixed up with that…

"Yes…I did say that..." Kagome swallowed. She tried to calm down. Hojo didn't look like he was buying the reaction to chocolate at all.

Hojo looked at Sesshoumaru. "That's odd…he doesn't look like any other case of allergies I've ever read about. Usually, in the most severe cases, there's trouble breathing, or swelling….other things in less severe cases, but usually it's when people start choking that you panic. There's nothing like that here. He looks sick, but he's not choking to death either. The way you were carrying on, I thought someone was dying!"

"But, Hojo…" This was it…

Kagome hoped she'd be forgiven. She took a deep breath, and dived in.

"It's not exactly an allergy. It's…he's a dog youkai. He didn't know not to eat it, so he ate over a _kilogram_ of the stuff! He was hallucinating before you got here!"

Hojo looked at Kagome, one eyebrow raised skeptically. He _must_ be dreaming. "Dog…youkai…? What on earth…? There's no such thing!" What was Kagome thinking…or not thinking? Had living in a shrine and burying herself in the library finally caught up to her? If the guy was hallucinating, he might be high on something…. Actually, he did look like someone who'd OD'd a little. Maybe that's what was going on…in which case, no wonder she'd not wanted him to go to a hospital. Oh dear…this was bad…this was _very_ bad…gangs, and drugs and hallucinations, oh shit…

Kagome looked down. "Hojo, I've not been honest with you. I promise to tell you later, but for now, let's assume he is one."

Hojo rolled his eyes. "Right. Whatever. First off, get that blanket out of here." Sure the guy was a youkai. He might have odd eyes…and come to think of it, weren't those ears a _little_ too pointy? Plastic surgery and contacts, maybe? He would bet ten thousand yen those tattoos were gang marks. Sesshoumaru wasn't some myth come to life. Hojo would grow wings before that happened. No wonder Inuyasha had been such bad news, if his brother was in a gang. Or a druggie. Or both. And Kagome was all mixed up in it…

"Blanket?"

"Yes. **That** blanket." Hojo pointed to the white 'blanket' wrapped around Sesshoumaru's arm. "What _other_ blanket is there?"

"Ah…Hojo? That's his tail. It doesn't come off." Kagome said delicately.

Hojo glared at the bed. Of course. It was the guy's tail. And he was king of Egypt. He walked over, and yanked at the 'blanket'. His eyes widened as Sesshoumaru jerked and yelped, the 'blanket' in his hands suddenly writhing like a snake.

"Shit! It's alive!" It was a tail! A **freaking tail**! It was his tail! What the hell was…Kagome was right!

Kagome sighed and rubbed her temples "Didn't I just tell you that?"

"…don't…pull that…Rin…" Sesshoumaru bit out. He curled up tighter, tail slithering out of Hojo's open hands, flicking irritably.

Kagome covered her mouth and fought not to laugh as she caught what Sesshoumaru had said. Rin must have been really something, if he let her get away with that…

She sobered immediately. He was dreaming for sure, or hallucinating, if that's what he thought was going on. Rin must be long dead by now, in her time. This wasn't really funny at all…

Hojo stared at Sesshoumaru, transfixed. "Who's Rin?" He looked at Kagome's little brother, slight shocked looking. "Souta, could you please go pull up my universities' website? Tokyo University." He gulped and looked at Kagome "I don't really know anything about this either…maybe you'd have been better off if I was a vet. Or more than a first year med student." Shit…what was he going to do now? This was nearly as bad as a druggie on his hands…at least he knew something about that. Not much, but it was a whole lot more than he knew about legends, or youkai…

"I can't take him to a vet for the same reason I can't take him to a hospital. He's…well, up till last Friday, he was collecting dust in the museum as a statue. Long story." Kagome fended off the flood of questions that little comment raised. "It will make sense if I tell it from the beginning. Later. I _promise_."

She had _better_ explain this one to him. What did that mean? Had Sesshoumaru really been a statue at one point? What did that make Inuyasha? What on earth was going on…? "Well, since you know about him, do you know anything about health stuff?"

"No…other than the fact youkai heal at a much faster rate than us. It only took Inuyasha a few days to recover when he got a hand through his stomach, and he was half youkai. Sesshoumaru is full blood."

'_A hand through his **stomach**…?'_ Hojo mouthed, amazed. Only a few days…to _recover_…most people would be dead from that, if it was a _hand-_sized hole! Besides…how had he gotten a huge hole though him! Who could do that? Maybe he _was_ in a gang after all…youkai gangs…

Hojo suddenly felt like the ground was dropping out from under him…

"Got the site, Hojo!" Souta called.

"Great. Now, let's see what they have in the student reference material…a dog you'd have to clear the stuff out of the system, I think…" Hojo prayed he could pull this off. It was nice Kagome trusted him enough to call, but…he didn't know anything! What if he screwed up? What if the youkai (A real, live, **youkai**! This was so weird…) What if Sesshoumaru died on him?

Hojo started sweating…

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Kagome sighed as Hojo entered the kitchen. It was almost five by now. She'd left him to do what he could half an hour, and had retreated to the kitchen, trying to recover from overextending herself and helping Hojo. She was too tired to pay attention to whatever Hojo was doing upstairs by now.

"He should be fine. He's sleeping, finally…but…I don't really know much about this, Kagome. I'm only a first year student. I don't know much about animals, and only a little more about people. And I sure don't know anything about youkai." Hojo entered the kitchen, groaned and slumped into a chair opposite Kagome.

Kagome clutched the teapot. "You know more than me about medical stuff. I could fix a busted arm, but not cocoa poisoning… And I can trust you. I don't really want a lot of people to know about Sesshoumaru being here, or about the story I'm going to tell you. That means you don't go telling tales to Yuka, Ayumi and Eri about Inuyasha! Or about Sesshoumaru!"

Hojo looked slightly guilty. Kagome had read his mind…he was finally going to hear the story behind this mysterious Inuyasha, and he wasn't allowed to share it? Damn…

"Promise. Or I won't say a thing."

When had Kagome gotten so harsh? That was a tough bargain… "Alright. I won't say anything about Inuyasha. I won't say anything about his brother either."

"Actually, it's half brother…," Kagome murmured. Louder "how about you sit down? Souta will tell us if Sesshoumaru wakes up. Right?"

"Sure, Kagome." Souta was a little disappointed. Kagome hadn't told them everything about her journeys, and he knew it. He was hoping to hear more, but if she needed to talk to Hojo by herself, then he'd go baby-sit Sesshoumaru. Maybe he could do his homework while he was waiting.

Kagome watched him go, and laid her hands flat on the table. "Please don't stop me halfway through. I'm not good at telling some of this. It…it's hard." Hojo nodded. He wouldn't interrupt this…he wanted to know about _everything_.

Kagome straightened up. Where to start? She was a little nervous, but nowhere near what she'd thought she'd have been, considering. She could trust Hojo with her life. Literally. She took one last, deep breath. "Really, the story begins on my fifteenth birthday, I guess. I was in the well house, and I was pulled into the bone eaters' well by a centipede youkai…"

Hojo sat in amazement as the story came out, little by little, of how Kagome had spent the last couple of years. He almost interrupted once or twice, but fell silent. He listened in near disbelief as Kagome related the battles, and the friends she had made.

And told him about the man…youkai…upstairs. He gulped as he learned exactly where Inuyasha had gotten a hand though his stomach…_why_ was Kagome taking care of Sesshoumaru? Why? He sounded like a real piece of work…

His Kagome had done all that? Killed evil youkai, blasted craters with her arrows, and witnessed firsthand the casual brutality of the feudal era? He could hardly equate the person he knew with the fearless girl in the story.

Yet…it was the same person. He knew it immediately. The kindness, the caring for companions, even, at times, the immaturity of a teenager abruptly forced to grow, it all shone through. He had seen the steel beneath her silk in the present once or twice. He could imagine her going out to protect her friends, taking off that layer to reveal shining silver.

She had done all those things…and he never knew…

He blinked as Kagome paused, finally. Kagome took a deep breath, and then started again. "The last battle…well…we defeated Naraku. And he…Inuyasha was killed." She blinked, hard.

"Sango, Miroku…they're probably married by now. I don't know. I wasn't thinking clearly the night I got back, after we buried him... I don't know why I sealed the well, but I did. I was hurting too much after Inuyasha died…I couldn't save him…he pushed me out of the way, and…" Kagome stopped. "I said I wouldn't cry over this again." She whispered. "I've cried enough as it is. And I can't seem to let go. That's part of why I went out with you. I wanted to forget, to distract myself. I used you, Hojo. I'm…I'm sorry. I'm so sorry…" Kagome paused. There, she'd said it. The truth.

The whole brutally honest tale had taken less time than she'd thought possible to share. There was just so much of it…how could it take so little time to explain?

She sniffed and wiped her eyes. Hojo watched, concerned look crowing over his face, but said nothing. After a minute, she went on.

"Anyway, I've been home for a year. I want to go back, but I can't. I started working at the museum, and I found him…Sesshoumaru…in storage as a statue…He was a lot worse then. You remember those pictures you see of the African famine?"

Hojo nodded. He'd helped organize a fund-raiser at their school a few years back for that.

"That's what he looked like after I unsealed him. So I brought him home, and he was getting better…till he went exploring in the kitchen and discovered the wonders of chocolate." Kagome sighed. "My fault. I should have done something…said something…"

Hojo blinked. "I thought he looked a little on the anorexic side. It isn't your fault. You couldn't know he'd find the chocolate. I think he brought it on himself…if nothing else, for pigging out." Obviously Sesshoumaru had never encountered chocolate before, or he would have steered clear. But still…eating at least a **kilogram**? That was just _stupid_…no one ate that much at once…even if they _were_ starving!

Kagome laughed a little, but quietly. She didn't want to wake Sesshoumaru up now that he was out for the count. Hopefully, he'd just sleep everything off…

Hojo sat in silence, thinking over the things he'd just heard. He was hardly able to grasp the wild story. But when he considered it, it made sense. This was the truth…

Kagome trusted him enough to tell him everything. That was something to cherish right there. He had to tell her he wasn't angry. She had done what she thought was best. He probably would have done the same…

"If you used me, I was happy to be used. I still love you…even though I know it would never work. I'm not sorry for anything I've done since your fifteenth birthday, even though I'm considerably poorer for it." Hojo laughed, slightly helplessly. "I never cloud say no, could I?" He fell silent. He knew he was being a lovestruck idiot, and truthfully, he was a bit mad, but the fact that Kagome trusted him enough to tell soothed the anger away to some extent. Hojo knew he was far too accepting. Perhaps he was in a state of shock.

"Hey…by the way, whatever happened to all the things I got you for whatever illness your grandpa came up with?"

Kagome turned red. "Um…grandpa ended up with most of them. He was the one who actually _had_ half those diseases…"

"Glad to hear they went to good use then." Hojo laughed, a little on the high pitched side. He should have known. Kagome's grandpa had made more than a few slips of the tongue towards the end. He couldn't believe he hadn't guessed.

"You're…not mad? You'll forgive me for all the lies I've told?" Kagome looked hopeful. She could hardly believe that Hojo would forget about her double existence that easily. Now she felt even guiltier. He was such a good person. She didn't deserve him as a friend.

"Kagome, I could never stay mad at you. If I didn't get mad after the fourteenth time you stood me up, why would I get mad now? I might be an idiot for it, but that's the way it is. I won't tell Eri, Yuka or Ayumi, though. That's yours to share with them when you're ready." There was no way he'd have told this story to Yuka, Eri or Ayumi, even without Kagome's promise. He wouldn't have done that to her for the world. They would probably think her a little odd…and they might not be quite as forgiving. This was her secret, to share with whom she chose. It was a story too close to the heart to be told by anyone but Kagome.

Kagome smiled through the watermarks on her cheeks. She didn't deserve a friend like Hojo. She was lucky to know him. It really was too bad they'd broken up, but she knew it would never work. Maybe he'd find someone for him, one day. Someone just for him, who'd really appreciate him, and love him back the way she never could.

"Hey…I've got a question. Can I see this Shikon thing?" Hojo wanted to see for himself what all the fuss was about.

Kagome laughed. "But you have seen it. It's always with me." Hojo's eyes widened as he thought of the one thing that never left Kagome's side. Her necklace, with its spherical pendant. It fit the thumbnail description she'd given him easily.

"That little purple bead? That's _it_?" Hojo had a hard time equating Kagome's ever present necklace with the legendary Shikon no Tama. His eyes widened as he recalled all the myths he'd heard. Now that he thought about it, some of the myths about the Shikon had matched pretty closely with the story he'd just heard.

"Yup. Wars have been fought over this 'little purple bead'. I always have it on me. I'm the protector. I take that seriously." Kagome pulled it out, and held it up for him to see, before tucking it away again.

He believed that. Kagome would take something like protecting the jewel very seriously. She was pretty responsible. "Have you ever read some of the old legends…wait. Stupid question." Hojo nearly hit himself. After the well had been sealed, she'd spent half her life in pursuit of old knowledge, whether it be through learning to become a miko, becoming an intern, or practically making the library her second home. "I'm sure you came across the legends about the Shikon jewel."

"Yes. I have a few books on them, actually. In some of the versions, they even get Inuyasha's name right. Or Kikyou's. I'm usually confused with Kikyou." Kagome scowled. It seemed she could never escape the dead woman's cold hands. Even though she'd been dead – and buried – for near five hundred years.

Hojo just stared at Kagome. She was tossing all that off as though it was nothing…it was a little frightening. It was hard to imagine what she'd seen…or what she'd been through. He understood her a lot better now. Not much, though. Kagome was still something of a mystery. He knew he didn't know everything yet. There were things she wasn't sharing about her trip to the past, and he respected that. It had to hurt, being cut off from 'home,' or watching someone die because they took a blow meant for you. He could hardly imagine what it would be like.

He noticed the circles under Kagome's eyes, and frowned. "Have you been sleeping much? You look ready to keel over."

Kagome waved him off. "It's not that so much…before you came, I tried healing Sesshoumaru on my own, or at least get him to calm down. It takes a lot out of you to do that."

"Heal? As in magic miko type stuff?" Could Kagome really do that? He'd heard her tell him she could shoot purifying arrows, and had purified the Shikon no Tama. From what he'd heard of Kikyou, there was a lot more a trained Miko could do. Was she trying to learn how to do all that? "Can you do that?"

"I've done it twice before…You remember Shiro, don't you? I healed his wing. You didn't know where all the blood came from. It was because his wing was almost severed…but…I'm not really good. I'm just guessing. I've got no teachers, here."

"I remember. I had no idea…that's pretty impressive, Kagome. Just figuring out that much on your own is pretty good! Did calming him down work?"

"A little. It worked enough I could get him from the bathroom back to bed. Before, he'd been thrashing around a little, and I was scared…He didn't even know I was there…" Kagome shivered as she remembered Sesshoumaru twitching on the bathroom floor. He'd almost looked like he was having a seizure or something…she'd been really, really scared. Almost as scared as during that last battle…she didn't know what she'd have done if she hadn't phoned Hojo, or tried to heal Sesshoumaru. He might have an ego problem, and the whole 'humans are insects' got old within the first few seconds, but she couldn't let him die.

"…I phoned you, and then I remembered healing. It didn't work as well the second time he started thrashing around though. Maybe I was just too tired."

Hojo nodded. "Still…that's amazing."

Kagome reddened. It wasn't really special…if she'd known everything a miko should, everything Kaede had tried to teach her, she could have done better. The silence widened as she sat quietly. What could she say now?

"Hey, want to see a couple of pictures? I have a few around." Kagome headed back up to her room, rummaging in the closet, face still pink. Hojo came in behind her. He noticed the swords cluttering the closet, and stooped to pick one up.

"Don't. That's Toukijin."

Hojo pulled his hand back as though he's been burned. This really was serious. Not some game. He realized he'd been thinking of it as something fun, an adventure that he was suddenly drawn into. It wasn't real somehow, or at least, the dangers weren't.

This wasn't a game. People had died. He could too, if he missed his step around Kagome or Sesshoumaru. They knew it was deadly serious, and the truth finally struck him too. This was no child's adventure novel.

It suddenly hit him that the man he'd attacked in a blind rage earlier really was Sesshoumaru. Someone who'd had no hesitations in killing people. He gulped.

He hoped the other man…youkai…whatever…wouldn't take it the wrong way. Surely, someone who'd adopted a little girl…or at least, that's what Kagome said he'd done…couldn't be all bad, right?

He thought back on all the old, lame crime investigators TV series he'd watched as a kid, and swallowed again. Just because Sesshoumaru had adopted Rin didn't make him halfway decent…it still meant, given the right circumstances, he could kill Hojo.

Kagome was a brave person. He admired her even more now for doing everything she'd done. She didn't even seem to know how special that was, how unique _she_ was.

"Ah ha! Here we are…want to look too, Souta?"

"Sure!" Souta bounced up out of the desk chair and came over to look over Kagome's shoulder.

They crowded around the picture book, going over all the people in the group. There was a picture of Inuyasha sleeping in a tree. The next photo showed him running at the camera, claws held out and ready to slice the flashy thing in half. A picture of Shippo as a balloon, and Sango with Kirara.

One of Kagome smiling and pulling gently on his ears, while Inuyasha rolled his eyes. He did look a bit like his brother, but not so much that you'd mistake one for the other. Hojo envied him. He hadn't known what he'd had…

Souta had never seen half of these before. Kagome really had been keeping secrets from everyone. He was about to ask when she'd taken the group photo, when Sesshoumaru groaned and stirred slightly.

Kagome put the book down and walked over to the bed. "Are you awake?"

Sesshoumaru cracked open an eye, then shut it quickly. He had such a headache… "…yes…"

What the hell had happened to him? Had she poisoned him…?

Kagome sighed. "That's good to know. You feeling any better now? You were in pretty bad shape after you ate all that chocolate."

Chocolate? He remembered the little paper wrapped parcels. 'Chocolate?' So. She hadn't poisoned him, he'd done it himself. How positively _splendid_…

They had tasted so good…then again, some of the most potent toxins tasted sweet. His own claws made corrosive venom that smelled of sakura blossoms…but one touch was death nonetheless. "Chocolate? Is that what the paper wrapped things I found are called?"

"Yes. I don't think I need to tell you not to eat anymore. Or eat anything else unless I say it's ok. I don't need you into something like dishwasher soap, or the medicine cabinet…I don't think you should go into the cupboards in the house again. Certainly if I find you looking at the stuff in my room, you're dead. But there **are** things you could poison yourself with."

She really hadn't thought about him getting into things at all. What if he'd eaten something really bad? Chocolate was no picnic, but at least it hadn't killed him. Some of the things they had in the bathroom to clean could have done that easily. Assuming he was similar to humans that way, of course.

Hojo stared as Kagome scolded the youkai half propped up on her bed. This was something one didn't see every day. He backed away slowly. Maybe it would be a good idea to leave. He glanced at his watch, and nearly swore as he saw he was late for dinner. "Kagome, I need to get home. I'm late already…I'll talk to you later, okay?"

"Oh! I didn't know you had to go so soon…Sesshoumaru, this is Hojo. He helped me take care of you."

Sesshoumaru looked at the human with disdain. "I see."

"Don't mind him. He just has 'issues' sometimes." Kagome whispered stage style to Hojo.

"What is that supposed to mean?" Sesshoumaru wondered what these 'issues' were. What exactly was wrong with him? If they were going to tell him what had just happened to him, he wanted to know. He remembered the flickering dreams the chocolate had brought, and mentally shivered. Those were no dreams…those were nightmares…

"It means you are an egotistical jerk who can't even say 'thank you' to someone who probably saved your life!" Kagome said loudly. Souta hid a smile at his sister's behavior with his hand, while Hojo just stared.

"It's ok…really! And I must be going. Bye!" He walked out the door, certain he'd seen something very few people ever witnessed. Kagome scolding the lord of the west a blue strip for his lack of manners.

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Kagome sighed. She doubted any of this was going to get through the youkai's thick head.

Sesshoumaru sat through her rant calmly, face indifferent. When it looked like she was finished, he moved to get out of bed. He didn't want to be in there any more than necessary. Certainly, he didn't want to listen to the lecture any more.

Souta smiled happily. Now was his chance to show off his 'new' computer! He'd been dying to do that ever since Kagome and his mom had brought Sesshoumaru home from the museum. He wandered over to the bed. If he'd been a cat, his tail would have been waving hypnotically…just before he pounced. "Kagome, can I show him my computer?" He grinned. "I think he'd like it. It's better than sitting in here all day…If you think it's ok?"

Sesshoumaru agreed with that. He had no idea what a computer was, but it would be one more thing he knew about this new world.

Kagome stopped waxing poetic about a certain youkai's manners under her breath, and paused. "How about later. When he feels a bit more with it."

"I'm fine." Sesshoumaru wrapped his tail around his shoulder, and got out of bed, hiding the effort it took. "What is a computer?"

"Oh it's great, you can play video games, and listen to music, surf the net, make movies…there's this great thing called the AMV. You can make those, and then download what other people have made and watch them…" Souta started talking, and wouldn't stop. He loved being able to show off his new computer…well, not new. It was an older machine, cobbled together for his use. But new to him! What normal person _didn't_ dream of having an Internet connection in their room?

Sesshoumaru yawned, wondering privately if computer was actually the name of another language. The only thing he'd understood in there was music...what were the other things? No doubt he would find out…

He winced as his stomach protested, but ignored it. He knew he shouldn't be out of bed, but he didn't want to stay lying about forever.

He followed Souta to where a grey box with a white square in front was set up on a table in his room.

Souta pointed to it proudly. "That's my computer! I got it all by myself!"

How much skill could it take to acquire a box? Granted, it was made of some odd substance instead of more traditional wood or metal, but still…

Souta pulled up an odd looking chair that spun, and his fingers flew over the second, slender box in front of the first. Sesshoumaru looked at it. It had all sorts of writing on it, on little squares. He watched the screen, and blinked as the little boxes Souta pressed down showed up on the other box.

He sat down next to Souta, and listened with a vacant expression on his face (think students during lecture) and watched as Souta opened up page after page of 'html code'…as far as he was concerned, it was _all_ some sort of secret code!

11111111111111

Kagome flopped down on her bad and sighed, rubbing at her temples. Just great. Her headache was back full force. She reached for the Tylenol in her desk drawer, and swallowed the little red pills with cold tea.

By now poor Sesshoumaru was at the tender mercies of an attention starved computer gamer eager to show off his favorite sites. She wondered how much he'd actually understand.** She** didn't know much other than basic stuff.

She was so tired… Kagome hauled herself off the bed before she could fall asleep, and went back downstairs to the kitchen. She hadn't even managed to tell Sesshoumaru about the well yet…she'd mentioned it, then he'd gone off and slept till this morning, not counting that brief time for food, and then…. Oh…it was just a mess…she had to talk to him soon…

Caffeine. She needed caffeine…one of these days, she was going to invest in caffeine pills…or an intravenous system to deliver caffeine to her directly, that might be better…. Kagome fell asleep at the kitchen table beside the bag of icing sugar.

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Sesshoumaru wavered a little on Souta's bed, and blinked. He got up after only a few minutes of confusing 'web pages'. He was tired after earlier…maybe Kagome was right, and he should still be in bed. It was frustrating to be almost recovered, and then be set back again. It was also irritating to have to admit Kagome had been right about his health…

Souta looked back behind him when he heard Sesshoumaru move to go. "Tired? Kagome thought you shouldn't be up…I can show you how to play games online tomorrow! That's ok, isn't it? Something to do if you get bored again!" Souta flicked off the computer screen and sat back in the swivel-chair.

Sesshoumaru ignored him as he went back to his room.

Souta laughed a little. Kagome had been right about the manners this guy had.

Sesshoumaru opened the door to his room. Computers, from what little he'd been shown, were one of the most inventive things made to date. It was astonishing, some of the things Souta had said or showed him. Had they really 'pulled up pages' from around the world? From the country where the men with guns and a single 'god' had come? England, or Holland…?

He thought that was the name of the place, but he wasn't sure. There was some sort of Dutch embassy near Nagasaki, wasn't there…? He hadn't really been paying attention for the last fifteen minutes…ever since he got up, if he was going to be honest.

Kagome had been right, much as he hated to admit it. He should have stayed in bed. Sesshoumaru winced as his stomach flipped over. His head wasn't doing so well either. Everything was still fuzzy…but he wasn't on the verge of throwing up again. This was a good thing.

He'd been sitting on the bed, polishing, when his stomach had twisted. He'd gone to put the cloth away, thinking he should lie down, when he'd gotten sick. It was more luck than anything he'd found the bathtub…and then it got hard to remember…

Before, he'd been sure he was back in that burgundy room. It had felt so real, like she was actually there…he hadn't thought of that memory in a long time. The day he realized she didn't care to know if he lived or died. All she cared about was her music…hers. Not whatever scraps he came up with to please her. He'd never been good enough as a son, and she'd said so often enough before she died.

He was sure there had been other things, but they teased him from beyond reach. He couldn't remember clearly enough to say what it was. A dream, or memories. He didn't know. But that room…

He hadn't thought of it in ages. So why now? He would never know.

He knew where the one other fragment he recalled had come from all too well. The day Damia had caught him off guard. The day he buried Rin. What had happened after… _'Not going there. I do not want to remember…'_

He pushed everything away from himself with an effort. Damia…in another time, he might have admired her daring for knocking him out of the way so completely. She'd been planning that for a long time. And right under his nose, too.

He hadn't even suspected she'd go that far…he'd been too occupied with Naraku, perhaps. It had given her just the opening she'd needed. She'd always been the most ruthless of his generals. However, for her to do that, after so long in his service….

She stood by what she believed in. Even if it _was_ those idiotic Purist's ideas. Too bad she hadn't been so loyal to him. Or perhaps she actually, truly _believed_ all that Purist drivel, and thought her loyalty was to all youkai before her lord…

It was hard to forget about her and her private crusade. One day, he'd have to do something, face everything she'd managed to do to him, to the power structure of the West. But not now. He was too tired.

He sighed, and lay back in bed. Still in his 'pajamas'…he hadn't bothered getting dressed all day. Pure laziness. He'd get dressed tomorrow, and have a bath. By some miracle, he hadn't gotten anything on himself when he was sick, but there was a lingering scent. He'd get rid of it tomorrow…

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Souta was the only one awake to meet Mrs. Higurashi as she came home from work. His sister was worn out, and sleeping downstairs at the kitchen table. Sesshoumaru was curled up again upstairs. And he was free to play on the computer as long as he liked…Souta blasted another alien, then ran downstairs when the door closed on tender hinges.

Mrs. Higurashi put her purse down and smiled as her son came from upstairs. "Hi Souta. How was school today?"

"Oh…boring. It got interesting when I got home though. Sesshoumaru got into the baking chocolate, and got sick."

"Oh my…is he ok?" Mrs. Higurashi frowned in concern. She'd heard stories about Inuyasha's more canine tendencies from Kagome, tales of him playing fetch at the beach, or growling. Sesshoumaru would probably be the same…

"Yeah. He's sleeping. But it was scary at first…he got sick in the bathtub, and he was hallucinating…"

"That's serious…are you _sure_ he's ok? I told Kagome I would stay home if she needed me to…" Mrs. Higurashi sighed tiredly. Sesshoumaru could have done a lot of harm to himself today. She'd not been sure at all about leaving him home…and she'd been right. No need to rub that in Kagome's face though. Was he alright…?

"He's fine now. Kagome called Hojo, and so he knows most of the secret now. Sesshoumaru kept shaking…I have to remember to ask Kagome who Rin is…" Souta said thoughtfully. He'd heard what Sesshoumaru said when Hojo pulled his tail as well as well as Hojo and Kagome had.

"Rin?" Mrs. Higurashi wondered who that was. Was she someone Kagome or Sesshoumaru knew from the past? Must be. None of Kagome's friends here had that name. Speaking of friends…had Kagome finally opened up to one of them? It worried her sometimes, that her daughter was so secretive about her time traveling. She sighed. She had been like that too when younger…and still was, come to think of it. Kagome came by that honestly enough.

"Yeah. Hojo pulled his tail, and he turned over and told Rin to 'stop doing that'…" Souta giggled. He wished he could have seen whoever Rin was pulling on the stuffy youkai's tail.

Mrs. Higurashi covered her mouth with her hand so Souta wouldn't see the smile. "Ah. I see. Not too good then, if he was doing that. " At least he was fine now. Thank goodness…what could one do about a sick youkai? Not a whole lot…

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_So, chapter 6 arrives somewhat early...lol. I'm moving update day to Monday for the time being anyway(__Wednesday is getting to be too busy__), and it was slightly evil to do the cliffhanger like that. Not as evil as some of the ones comming up, but still evil. Aren't I nice? lol.  
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_I know I left the 'Hojo playing doctor' part somewhat vague, but since A) My medical knowledge is limited to biology 30, and since B) I was writing from Kagome's somewhat sketchy/tired viewpoint, I figured I was allowed. Lol. Hopefully you all enjoyed it anyway. Appologies if Sesshoumaru's encounter with chocolate wasn't entirely reflective of what a normal dogs would be. He might be a dog youkai, but he's still youkai. So a little difference is ok, I figure.  
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_Thanks so much for the reviews, everyone! Much appreciated! _ )_  
_


	8. ch 7 : Damn Clock

**: Damn Clock :**

Kagome moaned and turned over as the alarm squealed merrily at her. One day…one day, she was going to toss it out the window. Or hit it with a baseball bat. Or use it for target practice…

She groaned again as she realized that all those things required her to get up. "Fine, fine. I'm up, you stupid clock!" She reached over and turned it off.

Wait…today was her day off! Kagome shook her fist at the alarm. "No! You woke me up for nothing! Oooh…stupid clock."

Kagome flipped over and went back to sleep for another hour before she got another wake up call, this time from Sesshoumaru's toe.

Kagome pulled the pillow over her head, eyes shut in a determined squint. "Souta, go away. Or I'll…"

"I am not Souta." Sesshoumaru nudged her again with his foot, hard enough to flip her off the edge of the futon.

Kagome grimaced and sat up. "You didn't need to do that. I'd have gotten up. Eventually."

Sesshoumaru stared down, completely unimpressed. He thought it rather unlikely she'd have gotten up anytime soon of her own accord. He'd been awake for a long time before the sun ever rose. He had been happy with that, as it was his normal routine. He was still tired, but this meant he was finally on the mend from both yesterday's incident, and from his imprisonment.

Souta had woken up early, too, to go on the computer, and once he discovered that Sesshoumaru was wide awake he'd picked up where he'd left off last night. He showed Sesshoumaru his favorite 'web sites' before he had to go to school…and there were many of those. Splashes of color, and occasionally sound from 'pop-ups' flashed by in a blur, only stopping two minutes before Souta left.

Sesshoumaru had been able to focus a lot better than last night, and the quick tour of the 'net had been an eye opener…not least because Souta had mentioned 'search engines', where you typed in a few words, and you got back a list of sites that matched the description given.

He could see the value of that easily. Here was a way to look for Damia and Mesau, or any other Purist sympathizers without leaving the house…he could get started on his search right away, instead of waiting till Kagome 'deemed it alright' for him to leave the grounds. He was still chafing at the promise he'd made to stay inside, though he knew why it was necessary. Finding Damia was the only thing he wanted to do, aside from learn. Apart from that, he was rather at a loss as to what to do with himself. He couldn't go back to where he wanted to be…

He'd come across the boredom problem yesterday…he couldn't find out much by himself, and he couldn't leave the house. Without someone to interrogate about the future, he was at a standstill. There was nothing to do, and Sesshoumaru _hated_ being bored. In his long life, this phenomenon had cropped up frequently, and he'd never liked it.

Souta had gone on about spending hours on this 'internet'…and Sesshoumaru could easily believe him. There was just so much there…a wealth of information. Granted, he had no idea what some of the pop-ups were talking about…what on earth was an elastic? Or hair-gel? He'd been surprised when some of the pictures flashed across the screen, while Souta just muttered about pop-ups and made them vanish.

Were people accustomed to such things? It must be so, from the way Souta had treated them. It was so very different from what he was used to. He had found a way to dealt with boredom for the time being…look for Damia and her pet human.

The only problem was Souta hadn't shown Sesshoumaru how to get _back_ to the internet. Strange words…but however you put it, Souta had 'shut down' the computer, and no matter how he pressed the keys on the keyboard, it wouldn't come back to life. Very irritating. So after trying everything he could think of, he'd come down here to wake up Kagome. Surely she would know something…

Kagome groaned and stood up. "Fine…. I'm awake, and coherent. What more do you want?"

"How does one get the computer to start?"

Kagome stared at Sesshoumaru. Gods…Souta had created a monster. Not only was her little brother a dedicated gamer, he was addicted to the internet. Her family hadn't had the cash to spare for a new computer, so he'd gotten a secondhand one from a friend to satisfy his electronic urges.

And now, it looked like he'd given Sesshoumaru a taste of the internet. How wonderful for her...

"Why do you want to go on the computer so early? I've told Souta before…getting up to play games at 5 is just plain _wrong." _Her brother really did need a life outside the world of electronics. He'd loved games when he was younger, but he hadn't been so addicted then. He'd just gotten worse as he got older, she supposed…

Play games? The silly girl thought he was using the internet to play _games_? Sesshoumaru almost snorted at the foolishness of it. He had never played games even as a child, and he wasn't about to start now. "No. There is a thing called a…search engine? I need to use it."

"Oh…what for?" Searching for something? What could he possibly be searching for that was so important? A dictionary…? That might be it…

"That is my affair, not yours." Nosy human, wasn't she? He had no intentions of sharing how he'd been caught off guard by Damia, much less of how she had managed to do so. Perhaps later he might say something about her likely seizing power in his absence. If he felt like it. He wondered if she knew anything about youkai politics. If she knew anything about the Purists.

Kagome shrugged. If he wanted to be so secretive, let him. She'd leave him alone. "Just asking. It might be easier to find the information if I pointed you in the right direction."

For a moment, Sesshoumaru was torn. He could track Damia down a lot sooner…if he asked for the human's help. And there was the problem. He'd never asked for help from a human in his life, not when it was something he could do himself. And he wasn't going to start now. Even Rin had given her aid unasked, just like Kagome had done now and before.

He'd do this on his own, even if it took longer. It wasn't as if he had anything else to do.

Kagome waited for him to answer, but when he remained silent she shrugged again. "Well, I'll be right there. After I get dressed…why don't you do that too?" She looked through a pile of clothing at the foot of her futon, and pulled out a few things before heading to the bathroom to change.

Sesshoumaru looked down at his pajamas, and blinked. He'd forgotten all about getting dressed in the face of Souta's web surfing, hadn't he? He had also meant to have a shower…and this time, he'd remember to close the curtains if it killed him…

He recalled Kagome patiently explaining why there was a shower curtain, and grimaced. When had he sunk so low as to let a human _lecture_ him on the proper way to bathe?

Then again, when had he sunk to this level of dependence on her? He had never had to rely on anyone before as an adult, and it was…odd.

In a way, he was grateful not to have to face this new world on his own. Not that he'd ever give voice to such shameful thoughts. It would completely ruin his reputation…if he still had one. No one but Kagome knew who he had been before. Now, he was just plain Sesshoumaru; ignorant youkai.

It unsettled him, and he turned on his heel and walked out of the living room.

Kagome had finally gotten him clothing he liked. A loose cream haori and a blue hakama with a few simple designs. He hadn't put it on since she'd gotten it, simply because he'd spent most of his time sleeping. Yesterday had been the first day he'd been out of bed for long, and even then it had ended in disaster.

He went to fetch his new clothing, pleased he wouldn't have to puzzle out anything else like that damn zipper.

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Kagome sighed as she stepped out of the bath and wrapped her damp hair in a towel. That felt good…ever since she had first gone to feudal Japan, she had appreciated the arts of modern plumbing a _lot_ more. She got dressed, and opened the door to find Sesshoumaru leaning against the wall, waiting for her to get out.

She blinked at him, and he pushed past her, closing the door without a word. Kagome shrugged, and headed into her room to get another chair for the computer. Ignore her, would he? After that, she went down to the kitchen for a bite to eat.

It wasn't long before she heard Sesshoumaru emerge from the bathroom, so she went back upstairs. He was waiting impatiently, tail dripping, for her to turn on the computer in Souta's room. Kagome bit back a smile at the towels around his tail, and pointed out the on switch. "See this? It turns it back on. This button here controls the screen. If the machine doesn't have its screen turned off, but it goes dark anyway, move the mouse."

"Mouse?" What on earth did a mouse have to do with a computer? Did these people actually allow _vermin _in their home?

"Not a real mouse….this thing here." Kagome held up the mouse, and then watched as the login screen appeared. She clicked, explaining how everything worked as she went.

Eventually, the computer was fully booted up, and Kagome hit Start. "The internet can be reached if you click on this icon for moxilla firefox…" Kagome waved the pointer over the firefox icon. Sesshoumaru frowned at it, wondering. Was that a picture of a kitsune? What did a fox youkai have to do with this Internet thing?

"Pretty simple…once you know it. It even has Google Japan set as the home page. Any time you click the home icon here…" She waved the pointer around. Sesshoumaru nodded, watching the screen avidly. "…you end back at this page."

Kagome was a lot better at explaining things than Souta. She didn't go too fast, and she didn't assume he knew anything. If this had been any other situation, he'd have felt insulted at the treatment, but since it was obvious he knew nothing about computers, it was to be expected. He learned faster this way…Souta had told him a lot, but nothing practical. Nothing he knew anything about, other than words that made no sense. He didn't care about whatever flash games were, but searching…there was an immediate use for that.

Kagome stood up. "Here, you try. I'm betting you sat and watched Souta…he's a computer hog. But you don't learn as well if you don't try it for yourself, so…" She moved out of the way, and Sesshoumaru stared at the keyboard.

He sat down in the chair slowly, and looked at the screen. Words stared back him, phrases like web, news, local, and advanced search.

Well, he wanted to search, didn't he? He hesitantly clicked on 'advanced search,' and another page opened up, just the way Souta had so easily managed to do before. He almost smiled at that.

The next page made even less sense than the first, with blanks and filter options, languages…he clicked on language, curious, and a huge list popped up. There were hundreds of different tongues….where had they all come from? Were they all human?

Kagome watched as he clicked on other things, smiling at each new discovery. She almost laughed as he stared typing one handed, a key at a time, in the search bar.

**No one** searched the internet for 'Damia, female, slender, purist, black hair with blue streaks.'

She stared to say something, but before she could comment, Sesshoumaru clicked on the search button.

"Ah…that's not a very practical way…"

Amazingly, several thousand items came up. The first entry had a description of a vampire in an RPG, and then a few entries about ladies wigs…..

Sesshoumaru stared at the screen. "I described her…why doesn't it work?" This wasn't telling him anything about Damia, unless she'd opened a wig shop, which he very much doubted.

"You need to make the search more specific. I'd assume it's a person you're looking for…or a youkai. A name probably would give better results. There are 68 thousand entries that match what you typed in."

Why was he looking for someone? She really knew nothing about him. Maybe he was looking for a loved one…well...probably not that, but…why was he looking for this person?

"That's not a good way to look. You need something like a name, or where she lives. Even looking for a picture in the image search might be better…" Kagome sighed as Sesshoumaru looked at the screen, puzzled. "Why are you looking for this Damia person anyway?

Why didn't a physical description work as well as a name? He thought for a minute.

Ah…the problem with the Internet was too much information then…somewhere in all that, there must be a clue that would lead to Damia. He hoped. There might be nothing for him to find, or nothing of use. He might just hear news of her death…

"Hey! I'm talking to you!" Kagome laughed softly. "Well?"

"That is my business. Nothing to do with humans." Not that that was really true. It had everything to do with humans. But he doubted she knew that either, and he wasn't going to explain it to her.

Kagome glared at him. This wasn't the end of this…one way of the other, she wanted to know why she'd had him dumped in her lap. If this 'Damia' had anything to do with that, then…or…no…maybe she was his lover or something…. Kagome blushed slightly.

Maybe she didn't want to know after all…

Continue the 'lesson.' Much safer area of conversation. "You can go back to Google later, but before you go any further, type in this address….that's in the bar up top." Kagome rattled off a series of numbers and words separated by dots and backslashes. Sesshoumaru raced to catch up, typing everything in one key at a time.

A new site came up, labeled 'Pictionary.jp'. Sesshoumaru looked at it in puzzlement, before Kagome stared to explain. "This is a site I came across a few months ago, when I was looking for Japanese/English dictionaries online. It's a dictionary…something with words, and a description of that word beside it. The difference with this one is everything has pictures beside the words. I'm sure you can see the value in that."

Kagome leaned over and typed in katana. Sesshoumaru raised his eyebrows as a small picture came into view beside the word, and a brief summary describing the sword. This would be useful…if he didn't know what Kagome was talking about, he could look things up on his own. Even looking through pictures, trying to match them to objects would be good, though tedious.

One more way to find out about the world around him. Sesshoumaru wondered how to write 'mp3', something Souta had mentioned briefly. It had something to do with music, and he was curious to see whether there were really millions of new songs to be found on the internet. That would be _amazing_…

"Oh…one more thing. If you want to be able to come back anytime to this site…and I think you will…add it to your favorites. They're located here…" Kagome leaned across to move the mouse. "If you click on any entry in the list, it will be added. To add things, click 'Add current page'…and if you hit these two arrows up top, you go back to the page you were on previously…these here are links…"

Kagome continued in her explanation of navigating in the internet till late afternoon. Sesshoumaru tried to remember everything, but the information Kagome was giving him was a bit much. He knew he wouldn't be able to remember all of this…or at least, not right away. The first time he was told to practice with a wooden katana, he'd been sure it would take forever to master everything…but it hadn't. He'd figure this out too if it killed him.

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Kagome sat back in her chair with a sigh. She'd been watching Sesshoumaru move around different information sites on legends. He'd been doing not too badly, actually. She figured he was now at about the same skill level as her mom, since Mrs. Higurashi went on the computer a grand total of about twice a year. He did type slower one handed, and also since it was the 'search and peck' method he was using. Of course it was slow going…

Her stomach curled up, protesting the lack of lunch. She poked Sesshoumaru in the small of his back. "Hey. Are you hungry? I am….I think lunch is past due." She'd been thoroughly distracted from everything else by the computer. It always seemed to end up happening. The biggest distraction ever made…

Sesshoumaru managed not to jump, but it was a near thing. He'd been concentrating on the screen, and hadn't expected the human to try doing something so stupid. He sat back slightly. Now that she'd brought it up, he was hungry. Again.

"Ramen?"

"Oh, you like it?" Kagome laughed sadly. "Inuyasha used to love it, too."

That reminded him. He still hadn't had opportunity to ask about the fire rat haori wrapped around Tetsusaiga upstairs. Since he'd found those things, he'd mostly slept, and then had been ill…and this morning, all he'd thought of was finding Damia on the internet. He had yet to ask if his brother was dead or not. They'd never been too close, but he should at least know.

He didn't hate Inuyasha for being a hanyou, but rather, for the choices he'd made, for his father's choices. His brother couldn't help the regrettable fact he was born…but he could have stopped that miko from pinning him to a tree all those years ago. He could have helped by not accepting a human's aid so freely…

…but now, who was he to talk? Wasn't he doing the same thing, making the same mistake…?

What about Rin?

Nonsense. He was in different circumstances. If it had been possible, he'd have left this house in an instant. _'But perhaps Inuyasha was trapped too…perhaps this Kagome offered her aid freely to him. I don't know…my own brother, and I know so little.'_

"You speak of Inuyasha as though he were dead. Is that so?"

Kagome looked down. She hadn't told Sesshoumaru about Inuyasha's death, had she? As a matter of fact, she'd told him very little. She'd never mentioned the well and time travel, or the possibility of going home. He'd told her equally as much. She needed to fix that. She'd meant to before, but something had always happened.… He hadn't been awake at first, then he'd gotten sick, or she hadn't been around….

Kagome had to deal with that right now. She should tell him everything she could…he deserved to know about his brother, even if he'd tried to kill him for his sword a few times. Inuyasha was, as far as she knew, his only immediate family. Unless he had a few cousins, or an uncle, his mother maybe…she didn't know.

"Yes…he's been dead for about a year….450 years. It depends on how you look at things." Kagome smiled sadly. She'd been able to say it, at least. Despite having time traveled as much as she had, it was still a little confusing.

"He went fighting Naraku. He pushed me out of harm's way, and was mortally wounded. He died just when we won." Kagome sighed. She hadn't told Sesshoumaru a lot of things…like Inuyasha's final words…no other living person knew those.

Sesshoumaru also didn't know about the well's seal. So she'd tell him about that next. "When I came back through to my own time, I wasn't thinking. I sealed the well which allows me to travel back and forth. It won't work with that barrier around it, and I can't break through."

As she spoke, Sesshoumaru listened carefully. So he had been right, and Inuyasha was dead. The knowledge didn't affect him as little as he had thought it would. He regretted his brother's death somehow. There'd never been much brotherly attachment between them, but it was still hard to hear the news. It seemed pointless to die for a human.

Why had Inuyasha let himself…? But…what about Rin? He had almost died for her. He had, in a way. It had been when he was burying her that Damia had attacked.

How could he judge his brother for shortcomings he was starting to share? Hanyou he might have been, and a stain on their family tree, but that fault was more his father's than Inuyasha's. He still didn't like his brother…

But _far _more important was the last part of the conversation. Was Kagome saying he might have a way back? He could go back home! He'd thought of it briefly, but the question had been driven from his mind. If she could time travel, why not him? It was nearly too good to be true. He almost smiled in delight. He could go back home! Away from this odd land, with its confusing contraptions!

Occasionally since waking he'd wondered why he kept going. Everything he'd ever known was gone. Why was he sitting and looking at this 'Google?' Why bother? Why…? But now…there was a way back. He could go to where everything made sense. Where he knew what could kill him, and what was worthless. Who he was, and who his enemies were.

Back to Damia. Back for justice.

"A barrier?" Barriers could be broken, after all. And then he could go home, back where he belonged…the computer was interesting, and there were a few other things, like showers, which he enjoyed. But he could easily do without the constant roaring of cars in the background, or the flood of noxious smells. He missed his lands, missed the forest, and most of all, the **freedom**. He hated being stuck here, unable to go where he wished. He hated being an exile.

"Yes. It's strong, and I haven't managed to get through in the year since I put it up." Kagome blushed a little, embarrassed to tell of her poor skills. "I know it sounds stupid, that I'm the one who put it up and I can't control it, but I don't know much about my power. I've tried learning a bit since, but the only thing I can do consistently is shoot purifying arrows. There's no one in this era who knows about miko powers for me to learn from. Actually…I was hoping you might look at it sometime, and try to get through. You're strong, aren't you?" There, she'd asked him.

Kagome hoped Sesshoumaru did better than she had. He probably wanted to go 'home' even more than she did. So it was in his interest to help her. This new world had to be confusing for him…. Inuyasha had still had a tough time adapting, even when she'd trusted him enough to bring him shopping. The press of people had irritated his nose and ears. Sesshoumaru had to have it worse.

Sesshoumaru thought it over. He _was_ strong, and there was a chance he could succeed where she had not, but not a good one. If this barrier was too powerful for her to break, it was more likely he'd end up purified than not. Still, there had to be a way though. He was determined to go back, one way or another. He would do anything to get home.

"I can try. I doubt it will work until I am fully recovered." Once home, he'd at least know where to find Damia. Entrenched in the western lands, pretending to mourn his death…or not. She was a cunning sort. He always preferred the direct approach to things, but she was nearly as bad as Naraku for coming up to a problem backwards and manipulating from the shadows. Even when she was little, everything had to be complicated. He didn't know what she might have done in his absence, other than seize power. She might be ruler, or she might be shadowy puppet-master, but he was sure who would hold the ends of the strings.

What had she done to the Purists? Inter domain politics would be a right stew, he would bet his life on it.

Kagome smiled. "That's all I can ask…hopefully, we can both go home!"

Home? Wasn't this Kagome's home? Sesshoumaru didn't comment, but he had been sure that Kagome lived in this time, that this was her family. Was she that in love with Inuyasha's world? His world? It seemed strange to think so.

He himself was homesick for the green of the western domain. He wanted to be where everything was familiar. Did she not share the same view? He hoped he broke the barrier. It would be good to come home…back to someplace where he belonged. Nothing was the same. The very air smelled different. Here, he was lost.

Here, the only vaguely familiar face was hers, the face of a one-time enemy, even if he'd stuck her off the list of 'people to kill' somewhere along the way. He wasn't _quite_ sure when or how that had happened, but it was the truth of the matter. Unless she betrayed him, he would never consider killing her. She'd done too much.

That said, Kagome bounced up off her chair, and ran back to the kitchen, while he followed at a more sedate pace.

When he got to the kitchen, Kagome was hovering anxiously over the kettle. "I'm so hungry…I can't believe we missed lunch!" She laughed "That thing is addictive…get on in the morning, and before you know it, it's dinner!"

Silently, Sesshoumaru had to agree. He had the feeling he'd barely scratched the surface of what the internet was…and that was hardly all a computer could do. Kagome had told him about other programs, word processing, music players…media, as she put it. You could paint, or make a movie…whatever a movie was. It was amazing. He knew how he'd avoid being bored from now on.

Kagome sighed happily as the kettle beeped. "I think we could go to the well after this, and see if we can break through. After we eat, though!"

Another thing he agreed with. Food was very important…even if it was human food. Ramen wasn't bad at all…but it still wasn't as good as something you hunted and ate yourself.

Kagome broke out the food, and both sat at the kitchen table. Kagome rattled on about her previous attempts to open up the well, and he sat and listened. When both were almost done, Kagome bounced back up and opened a compartment he hadn't noticed before, hauling out a bucket covered in ice.

"Ice cream! I think you'll like it…this is vanilla, and not chocolate." Kagome laughed. "A _little_ chocolate probably wouldn't hurt you if it was milk chocolate instead of baking stuff, but there's not much sense in tempting fate so soon."

Oh yes. Even if a little of this chocolate wasn't going to do anything to him, he wasn't about to eat any. Even if it did taste good, it was _poison_. He had no desire to loose himself in chocolate induced nightmares again.

What was ice cream? Odd name. Obviously, it was cold…cream of ice?

Kagome bounded over to the cupboards, got bowls and spoons, and then scooped out pale yellow curls of what he assumed was the ice cream she spoke of. Kagome put the bucket back in the compartment, and plopped the bowel in front of him. He stared at it suspiciously.

Why was it cold? It didn't make much sense to him…he picked up the spoon awkwardly, and tried digging in. The bowl wobbled dangerously, and he stopped.

This ice cream was hard to dig into without a second hand to steady the bowl. He cursed Inuyasha tiredly out of habit, then himself, for his stupidity. It wasn't the first time he'd done so, and wouldn't be the last.

He finally managed to tease some of the ice cream onto his spoon, and nibbled. It wasn't good the way the chocolate had been…but it wouldn't make him sick either, according to her. It wasn't as good as the ramen.

He decided he didn't like ice cream, and pushed the bowl back after a few polite bites. Manners didn't allow him to insult his 'hostess.'

Kagome didn't seem to notice, and as soon as she'd finished she put the dishes in the sink, then ran out the back door. Sesshoumaru followed her closely to a shrine, and paused outside it.

This was definitely the spiritual power he'd sensed before, quite strong now he was beside it. He looked at Kagome with a bit more respect. This little human girl had done this? _Untrained_? Most priestesses never managed to produce something like this even at the height of their powers.

She was a force to be reckoned with. He wondered what she would be capable of when she'd come into her own power, and held control over it. It would be interesting to watch her do so. Sesshoumaru was slightly glad they were on friendlier terms now.

He looked around the grounds, seeing them as the shrine they were for the first time. He hadn't realized he'd been within a Shinto temple, but it made sense. Shrines always took people in …and Kagome had been a miko in the feudal era who fought with arrows. It suited her.

He pushed past Kagome and walked though the looming sliding doors of the well house to look at the gloomy, closed in interior. He frowned at the minimal space, and at the ancient boards of the walls. So small…

The barrier wasn't visible until he brought his hand close to it. The crackle of energy reached out and played over the surface of the ward, touching his fingertips and making him wince. He didn't move his hand closer. He didn't like any of this one bit, but if he wanted to get home, he had a job to attend to.

This was nearly strong enough to kill him…at the least it would purify him near to death. He was shocked a human had this much power…yet, she wasn't the first human to have this level of strength. He'd come across a barrier only a little stronger than this once before, at the holy mountain. He had wandered around its base for days, trying to get in to where Naraku was hiding. This barrier didn't announce its presence for miles the way that one had. It was quietly powerful, not blatant. It was no less strong for that, though. It just took closer examination to show the force of the ward.

He let youki swirl around him, watching as it sent sparks up from the faintly glowing barrier. He wouldn't be able to do much if he attacked it directly, or with his whip of energy. Perhaps… if he retrieved Toukijin from Kagome's closet…

Kagome watched as Sesshoumaru tested the barrier, then turned back to the house. Where was he going? She didn't think he'd have given up already. She ran out the door of the well house and then watched as he disappeared through the back door, reappearing a few minutes later with his sword.

Ah. He was going to try and blast through…Kagome gulped. What would happen if she let him destroy the well house? Her grandpa was coming home tomorrow and she didn't want to have to explain _that_ to him. He'd probably be upset Sesshoumaru had 'moved in' for now anyway. He had never been entirely comfortable with Inuyasha. Another, stranger youkai actually _living_ with them would be worse.

She couldn't afford to get grampa mad because the mini-shrine bit the dust. Not to mention the fact her family couldn't pay to rebuild the whole shrine…

The shrine didn't make much money for their family, and she hadn't realized till recently how much it cost to maintain. Grandpa had had to have cleaners come in until she took over the task, but now that she had a job it didn't work. Plus, they couldn't afford the cleaners at this point…

A problem for another time. Right now, she had to get Sesshoumaru not to destroy everything on the grounds by accident.

He brushed by her and went to stand in front of the barrier again, sword held out in front of him.

"Sesshoumaru…please don't blow us up or something. This is my house…grandpa would kill me if something happened while he was gone!"

Sesshoumaru closed his eyes. He hadn't planned on 'blowing up' the shrine, but it was possible there would be some recoil of power. He disliked creating an explosion in an enclosed space anyway. It always made him feel as though the ceiling were falling in on him.

But, Toukijin operated by unleashing brute strength, and he figured that that was the best way to break though the barrier. Rather unfortunate that he was unable to use the Tetsusaiga, since it was capable of breaking though such things, but he couldn't, and there was no use sitting and wailing about it.

Hacking blindly and hoping it worked was more his brother's style, but he couldn't think of anything else offhand. Sesshoumaru lifted his sword, and swung it hard at the barrier. It bounced off, sending hissing purple sparks to the wooden floor.

Kagome gnawed on a fingernail. She had felt the attack slide away, and wondered. Would Sesshoumaru be able to get though, weakened as he was?

Sesshoumaru held his sword out, and drew it back again, focusing power in the blade. It had been a test to swing like that, but now he got serious. He swung again, and showers of spitting, angry purple bounced off the swords surface, throwing him back slightly. He could feel the barrier trying to purify the sword, and through the blade, himself. Sesshoumaru dug in his feet and braced himself for another swing at it. This was just like when he'd fought Naraku before his father's grave, testing a wall he probably couldn't get through.

Sesshoumaru sent crackling blue racing at the ward, glaring. He wasn't going to be beaten by some half trained priestess's barrier!

Blue lightning stuck home, and splashed around the barrier, vanishing as soon as it made contact. Smoke wafted up from the floor where scorch marks had formed from the heat.

Kagome blinked to clear the spots dancing in her vision, and stared at the barrier.

Nothing.

That last assault had done nothing to even _scratch_ the surface of the ward. She watched as Sesshoumaru lowered his sword, then brought it up swiftly and sent wave after wave of power hurtling at the wards she'd accidentally constructed.

If she hadn't known him better, she'd have sworn he was _angry_…but from what she knew of Sesshoumaru, he never lost his temper like this. Kagome covered her eyes against the light, and when the room was once more still, she unveiled them.

Sesshoumaru stood on a patch of smoking floor in front of a barrier that was still very much intact.

He had doubted loosing control and attacking blindly would do much good, but he'd done it anyway. Sesshoumaru closed his eyes, and lowered Toukijin's point to the floor. Nothing he did now would get him through. The ward was simply too damn strong. He couldn't go home. Yet.

He was still amazed the tiny girl behind him commanded that power. He had seen the effects of her arrows, and had even been shot at a few times, but he had never dreamed she could do this. He felt slightly embarrassed that a slip of a girl could best him so unintentionally.

His estimation of her went up another notch. No wonder Inuyasha had been willing to use her help so often. She was a valuable ally. Human or not, she wasn't as weak as most of her species. No wonder so many youkai used human miko as allies…

Sesshoumaru turned on his heal and left the building. He walked stiffly across the courtyard, and disappeared into Kagome's room. Kagome watched him go, but made no move to stop him.

If nothing else, he'd be tired after fighting with the barrier. Perhaps he still wasn't recovered enough yet. He might still be able to get though. Whenever she had fought with the ward, mind alone or with arrows, she had been exhausted. She'd leave him alone till dinner. Kagome smiled as she thought about that. Sesshoumaru hadn't eaten with her family yet because he'd been sleeping, so tonight would be a first…

And, tomorrow her grampa got back. He still didn't know about their guest, so…she'd have to explain. Or her mother would, before he got home to find the shrine 'infested'. That was all she needed, have him come home and try pasting scrolls all over Sesshoumaru…

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Sesshoumaru sat on the bed and stared blankly at the closet, not seeing the girl's clothing hanging there, but the sword he'd once wanted so badly. Tetsusaiga, the sword that could fell a hundred youkai in one swing. The sword that broke barriers, and could send a wave of diamond spears at an enemy. His father's fang.

Would having his father's legacy make him the great Inutasio's equal at last, or stronger than that barrier out there?

He didn't know.

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_Slightly fillerish chapter. But it needed to be written, so bah. Hope you all enjoyed Sesshoumaru getting to wave Toukijin around. Hehe. Not sure when the next update will be, exactly. I'm going on vacation in a few days. Probably till the begining of September before I'm back, since I'm off to the land of no interent access(I want my laptop! But I don't have it yet...)...but at least there's no terrible cliffhanger this chapter. And there's still quite a few more chapters written yet, ready to go, before you'll be reduced to my 'regular' update habits. lol.  
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_Reviews, as always, are much appreciated. Thank you to all who left their thoughts for me to read, and to those who might yet do so this chapter! _


	9. ch 8 : Sweet Dreams Are Made of These

**: Sweet Dreams Are Made Of These… :**

Sesshoumaru watched, vaguely interested, as Kagome poked her head around the door and looked into his room.

Kagome smiled happily. "Dinner…Mom got a treat for us! Cajun Salmon!" It had been a very long time since she'd had western style food, excluding Wacdonalds. _That_ wasn't real food. She couldn't believe she'd eaten there as much as she had in previous years. But salmon…mom must have gotten it for grandpa's return home.

Sesshoumaru uncurled from Kagome's bed, and followed her to the kitchen, breaking off his train of thought. He had been going nowhere but a circular trip through self pity. He'd been able to tell something appetizing was cooking for the last while. No more noodles…

He thought they were having fish from the smell of things, which was fine with him. Ramen wasn't bad, but it had been pretty much all he'd eaten since being freed, aside from the ill fated chocolate and the rather bland ice cream.

He walked into the kitchen and sat down, watching as Souta came in from where he'd been playing something loud and explosive in the living room. Kagome pulled out a chair next to him, and sat down.

"Dinner's ready…Have you ever had blackened cajun salmon, Sesshoumaru?" Mrs. Higurashi said from beside the stove. She picked up plates and started serving, cutting up the single, beautifully cooked, fish.

Sesshoumaru looked up. It was interesting to watch the woman using the …stove? He had a few fond memories of doing that with Rin. He had rather less fond memories of fancy banquets with the lords of the Western lands. Ceremony was always a bore. He was a little glad that this meal didn't seem to involve any of that. He doubted it would be formal at all, judging by the Souta's behavior…

Souta bounced up and down in his chair, eager to get back to the latest video game. He looked across at Sesshoumaru. "Come on, it's _salmon!_ Smile! Don't you ever smile?" He demanded.

"Souta, you're being rude…" Kagome scowled at him. Privately, she wondered. Souta did have a point…she didn't think she'd ever seen anything like a real smile on the youkai's face. A smirk, yes. But a smile? Never…he really should try it more…

Sesshoumaru ignored everything but the plate coming towards him, curious as to what kind of 'Cajun' food he was being served. He didn't care about the human's rudeness…as far as he was concerned, they hadn't treated him as a lord to start with. He doubted they would start doing so now. From what he'd seen, he was being treated like a part of the family…which was very…odd.

It didn't matter to him, much. He'd never cared for ceremony, and now, he wasn't even a lord, so it mattered even less. He wondered if it was just this family, or if everyone else of this time was less formal.

He blinked at the thick, steaming fillet of fish on his plate. Vegetables and roots were piled up on one side, and the whole works was covered in sauce that smelled of spice. He didn't recognize the smell, so this must be a seasoning he hadn't tasted. Was it Cajun? It would be interesting to see what it was like.

He waited till everyone had sat down and started eating before trying any of it. He wasn't sure what sort of manners were expected of one in these times, since nothing he knew applied. He didn't really care about offending his hosts, but he did want to know anything he could about how this world worked.

He delicately picked up a piece of meat, and took a bite. His eyes widened momentarily. The fish was excellent…but the sauce left his lips burning so hot they were growing _numb_. Sesshoumaru sat and carefully reached for the water glass next to his plate, forcing himself not to snatch at it or run screaming from the room. That would be simply intolerable!

But...How could they eat this **fire-stuff**!

Once he'd drunk some water, he tried to eat around the sauce quietly. Dinner conversation wafted around him unnoticed. That was another thing that was odd…Rin and Jaken had sometimes talked over a meal, but he'd eaten alone and silently.

"Not too spicy, is it?" Mrs. Higurashi asked brightly once Sesshoumaru had let go of the water glass. "I love spicy cooking, so we had blackened salmon…but I didn't think till now whether that would be ok. Inuyasha had a lot of trouble with my curry."

Kagome laughed as she remembered Inuyasha's reaction to her mom's curry, aka. the 'bowl of fire'. Her mom was a good cook, but Mrs. Higurashi loved spicy food to a fault. She could eat an entire bowl of the hottest wasabi and not need water…and she sometimes forgot that other people did not posses tongues of leather.

Sesshoumaru looked at the fish thoughtfully. So his brother had done the same, had he? It stung a little to be compared to him. He was not, and never would be, Inuyasha. No doubt his brother had been vocal about the spice. Well, not him.

"It is a little hot." He conceded softly, fighting to keep his face straight and his eyes from watering in pain. His lips started feeling cold, they were burning so strongly. He was going to taste _anything_ else this woman cooked to see if she'd dumped spice…or powdered flame, depending on your point of view…on the baking.

Kagome smiled behind her hand. "Which means it's probably more than a little too hot for him. You never say anything, so I'm guessing you're dying of a spice overdose right now…"

Souta grinned. "Wow…spice overdose! Any minute his eyes are going to go blue and he'll be able to see time!" Souta laughed at his own joke, but stopped when everyone looked at him blankly.

He sighed. "Oh come _on_…hasn't anyone ever played the Dune? The video game?"

Confused looks met this little announcement, excluding Sesshoumaru, who elected to stare at the fish instead. He nabbed at sliced carrot with his chopsticks and tried it. Not bad. For a root.

Souta gave an exaggerated sigh and looked at his mom and Kagome in agony. "Hasn't either of you ever played that? Or read the books…? I think it was based on a book at any rate…" He looked at his plate, sulking. It always sucked when he made these brilliant jokes and no one ever got them. Why wouldn't his sister _play_ some of these games? She'd get all the jokes he made then…

Souta perked up as he thought of a brilliant idea. He'd teach Sesshoumaru to play video games! Then he could have an opponent to play against in Halo…and at least someone other than his friends at school would get all the corny gamers jokes! Souta started plotting towards that end, pushing his food around on his plate happily. He could teach him all sorts of things…although…just one hand for the control would be a bit of a problem…

He looked over at Sesshoumaru, and remembered some of the questions he'd had when Kagome first brought him home. Now seemed as good a time as any to ask him about the missing arm, or those cool stripes on his face, and the blue moon. "Are those tattoos? They're pretty cool! Inuyasha didn't have them anyways. And is that your tail? Inuyasha had ears, so I guess it makes sense you have a tail!" Souta smiled widely after unleashing his first round of questions, and waited for an answer. He wanted to know everything…it was so exciting, having Sesshoumaru here! And he had swords! Not one, but two!

Kagome covered her face in her hands. Wonderful…Souta was being so irritating…could it get any worse? "You don't have to answer." She quickly told Sesshoumaru. Hadn't she asked Souta not to ask questions the way he had wanted to? Showed how much he listened to her…. Of course..._she_ wanted to know some of the answers to those questions too…

Sesshoumaru considered the little human across the table. It wouldn't really hurt him to answer…but he didn't feel like doing so.

Then again, the human…Souta…had put up with all his questions earlier. Perhaps he would return the favor.

"Tattoos? They are not." Perhaps there would be no more questions after that, and he could go back to eating in peace. Rin had never asked him questions all the time…

"Really? Then what are they? Why is your arm missing? Did it get cut off, or was it an accident? Oh! Can I borrow your swords? They're so cool! Kagome wouldn't let me touch them," Souta glared at his older sister. "But I can borrow them, can't I?"

Borrow his swords? Was the human crazy? From the distressing amount of babble he'd heard recently, it was quite possible. Certainly, this whole world sometimes struck him as insane to the nth degree. He supposed thanks were owed to Kagome for keeping Souta away from his swords and from the armor. Not that he was going to thank her aloud…

He sighed. Principle prevented him from killing the insane…it just wasn't honorable. If Souta attacked him, only then would he be able to get rid of him. Probably not even then, since he was part of the Higurashi family and therefore on his rather short 'not to be killed' list, next to Kagome. He missed the companionable silence Rin had offered, when she'd sensed he wanted peace. It had been so quiet then…

"Souta! What did I say? No playing with sharp pointy objects! Especially the ones that don't belong to you!" Kagome curled her fingers into fists. She just had to ask fate the rhetorical question of whether or not it could get worse, hadn't she? And so then **of course** fate had to give her an answer…

"You will not touch those swords." Sesshoumaru stated in his soft, steely voice. He was still quite affronted that Souta actually thought he could get away with asking if he could borrow Tenseiga and Toukijin. There was no way he was going to let the little brat lay a hand on his swords. Or armor. He'd not spent all that time polishing it before he got sick for nothing. No doubt if he were to have a case of momentary insanity and gave them to the child, he'd get them back in a horribly scratched and dented condition. He didn't mind taking care of the scratches he inflicted on his own possessions through use, but he wasn't going to lend them to anyone else for them to damage. Least of all a human boy.

Souta seemed to realize he'd stepped out of line, perhaps alerted to the fact by the patented death glare his sister was sending in his direction. He stopped talking, and the rest of the meal passed in relative quiet.

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After working his way through the fire literally poured all over the food, Sesshoumaru sat back and watched as Mrs. Higurashi started clearing dishes and putting them in a low slung rack of shelves.

Once the table was cleared, Mrs. Higurashi sat down across from Sesshoumaru. "Nice to see you up and about finally. You've been sleeping so much." She smiled, thinking back to the few times she'd looked in on the youkai. He'd been curled up on his side in the bed, tail wrapped around him like some luxurious blanket. Her fingers had itched to pet his tail while he was curled up like an outsized puppy, but she had managed to control the impulse, with some difficulty.

Inuyasha had never liked his ears being patted, and Kagome had told her Sesshoumaru was worse than his brother when it came to that. She should get a dog one day. Then she could cuddle it all she wanted without having to worry about having an offended youkai on her hands…

"I suppose I should have expected that, since you were in pretty bad shape when you got here, but it's nice you're up and about now. You know you're staying here for the time being, right?" It really was a shame all these youkai were so cranky when it came to being petted. At least, Inuyasha had been.

Still, it didn't stop her from wanting to hug Sesshoumaru's tail, currently draped over the back of the chair. It would almost be worth the appalled look Kagome would give her to be able to bury her fingers in the soft fur…

Of course, Sesshoumaru would probably object violently. He wasn't anywhere near as friendly as Inuyasha, and Inuyasha had been vocal in his disapproval. So far he'd been holed up in Kagome's room. He didn't seem like a people person. Or a petting person.

Still…a woman could dream…

Sesshoumaru nodded, wondering what the woman across from him was thinking. She had an odd look on her face…

It had to be hard for the family to accommodate him, though he was not going to say anything. If they wanted to house him, that was their choice. He'd suspected he would have to stay here. Kagome had never directly said he would stay here on a more or less permanent basis, but she had implied it. Now he had a little confirmation.

He could do worse. At least here he knew someone…if having attempted to kill Kagome the first time he 'met' her counted as knowing. (He'd been put out at the time, but looking back now, it had been a good thing he hadn't killed her, he decided).

Here, people knew and understood at least a little about him, and he would be unlikely to find that anywhere else. From what he'd gathered, he could easily be arrested if he was found wearing his swords and armor around town, much less using them. It would probably be more of an irritant than anything to be arrested, but it would be easier to just avoid it.

It wasn't as though he had anything better to attend to. All he wanted was to find Damia, and find out more about this world. Find traces of the youkai that should have been here, traces of the Purists, the Fellowship. He could do so right here through Kagome's family and the computer. Other than that…he didn't know.

And more than anything else, the well was here. That was reason enough for him to stay for a generation.

"Yes. I suppose so." He would stay. For now.

Mrs. Higurashi smiled. "I hope you enjoy being here. I know it has to be a lot different than what you're used to. Whenever Inuyasha was here, he went back to the feudal era as fast as he could. I know it was mostly because of the jewel, but I don't think he liked it here that much." He'd never really been comfortable in the future. Sometimes, Inuyasha had complained about all the rules here…Mrs. Higurashi smiled at some of the memories. He'd also been scared of her cooking…for some reason, after she'd fed him her special curry he hadn't wanted to eat anything she'd made unless Kagome had some first. She couldn't imagine why…

"Oh, one more thing. My father – Kagome's grandpa - is going to come back from up-island tomorrow. I thought you might want to know before he arrived. He's not exactly used to youkai." She remembered well all the times her father had pasted scrolls on Inuyasha. They hadn't done anything but make a mess. Even so, Inuyasha hadn't liked becoming her father's pet paper-mâché project. She hoped he would listen to her when she went to pick him up. She'd have to tell him about the new member of the family, and that he probably wouldn't be able to go on any more trips for a while. Money was getting a little too tight….

She'd already seen the grocery bill increase quite a bit, and it would probably grow more. Water bills, electrical bills….they would all go up. The shrine had been on a slow decline for a while, but it was beginning to catch up to them. There had to be some way to do better. Especially since the addition of a hungry new family member…

"I see." Sesshoumaru got up to leave. So there was another human who lived here? He'd wondered whose room was on the end of the hall. It hadn't made sense to him that Kagome elected to sleep on the futon downstairs when there was an empty chamber down the hall. He'd assumed there was another already occupying it, and he'd turned out to be right. Considerate of Kagome's mom…he didn't yet have a name to attach to her. Mom was the only title she was given. He **definitely **didn't feel like calling her mother, so he'd avoided addressing her directly.

He wandered towards the stairs, but was intercepted midway by Souta. "Done talking? Great! I've got something to show you!"

What new electronic device could the boy show him this time? He frowned at the sounds coming from the living room. What was that noise? It sounded like it had a rhythm, and voices. It sounded like nothing he'd ever heard before…

Sesshoumaru followed the excited little boy to the living room, and watched the screen of the TV. Souta clicked more of the buttons that humans seemed so fond of on a piece of plastic, and grinned back at him. "It's my new game! Halo 2…It's even better than the original Halo!" He flicked a few more buttons and twirled the wire with a flourish. "See? This…" Kaboom! "…is how you play it!" On the screen, debris flew outwards from the place Souta had fired upon.

You played it by pressing buttons? Sesshoumaru raised an eyebrow. How boring…

Something about health points flashed across the picture of a man in oddly constructed armor. "Damn…lose a few more points and I'm dead..." Souta frowned and hunched forwards, intent on the flickering screen.

Sesshoumaru snorted. Was this a mock battlefield? This 'Halo 2' was **nothing** like the reality of battle. You slowed down once wounded for starters, and you had no time to 'pause' the surging mass of people. It was a confusion of different scents and smells, a dance where you had to be alert or you were claimed by the silence of death. A melee could spell wounds or death for even a seasoned fighter. A novice swordsman might take him down from behind if his concentration slipped for a moment.

Novices and masters. Those were to be watched the most. Novices were unpredictable, wild. A swing of the unskilled one's katana might take out several people before being taken down though the huge opening in defense.

This game might look funny, like a painted dream, and the harsh sound of explosions was interesting from sheer novelty, but it was nothing like reality. It was as real as the daydream it resembled.

Even a duel with a few, or one, opponent was the same as a battle. You pitted your own skills and strength against another, and fought. It was nothing like the calmness of an electronic screen. It certainly had nothing to do with _health points_.

He looked closer, wondering what sort of weapon had made the explosions. If humans had created guns like that, he had been wise to stay within the house. Something like that was nearly as strong as what a mid class youkai could do…

"Do humans really make weapons like those?"

Souta pressed the pause button again. "Not exactly like these ones. These is sci fi." Sesshoumaru narrowed his eyes slightly. Not _exactly_ like? What did that mean?

"But we can make explosions that size with other things. Like bombs, or nukes. Machine guns are cool too! There's this cool game called Socom, and it's got a ton of real life guns in it. I think the machine guns are the coolest. They work a lot better."

Machine guns? How often in one breath could Souta call them 'cool'? Why were these machine guns so good? Sesshoumaru had no idea what they were, but he didn't think they would be pleasant. He wasn't entirely sure what a nuke or a bomb was either, but if it could cause the same amount of damage as Souta once he'd gone back to 'playing,' it must be a _lot_.

He had wondered before what sort of improvements to weapons humans had thought up in the past few centuries. Now he knew about a couple of them, and he wasn't happy.

How could they be so strong? Perhaps this was why there were no youkai about. They had been slain.

Sesshoumaru turned back to the stairs. This was disturbing. He wondered what it would be like to face something like those explosions on the battlefield. He would be able to survive if one of them was used against him directly, but most youkai wouldn't. Even _he_ would be burned and slowed, made into an easy target if he were to be caught in the midst of such a blast. One explosion of that magnitude wouldn't kill him, but it would make him easy prey for a machine gun, or another explosion.

Disquiet followed him into Souta's room. He had to know more about these bombs, nukes and guns. Sesshoumaru flipped on the computer and opened up the Internet. Time to test its use.

Souta watched from the corner of his eye as Sesshoumaru left without a word. He hadn't had much of an opportunity to talk to the silent, poker faced youkai. He'd only woken up once on the weekend, and then only for a few minutes to eat. After, he'd had cocoa poisoning. Then…Souta had shown him the computer, but really, that was it. He hardly knew anything about the new member of the family at all!

He had to fix that. There were so many questions he had to ask!

Like the all important question of whether he could borrow Sesshoumaru's swords if he was really, _really_ careful…

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After Sesshoumaru had vanished into the living room, Kagome came back to the kitchen. She sat beside her mom for a while, then sighed. "I know you're worried about the bill grampa's trip is going to make. How much is it?"

Her mom blinked, jolted from her own thoughts, "How much? Why?"

"I have a part time job, remember? It's not much, but surely you didn't think I wouldn't help you? I saw last month's bills, mom. You could use the help." Kagome crossed her arms. Her mom was stubborn, and no doubt felt it was her problem. She didn't seem to think that since Kagome lived under the same roof, she should help out. Kagome wasn't about to sit by while her mom waved off last month's expenses.

Her mom had spent a lot on her. She'd helped pay for the course on miko at the cultural center, as well as all the things that had been put towards her quest for the Shikon. She had bought her a new bike when the others had been broken. She'd always been there. Kagome had never known what that had meant for the shrine till the past few months had opened her eyes to what was really going on.

Now, it was time to give back what she had been given. Her job didn't make much, but it would be better spent on her family than something stupid like clothing she didn't need, or a purse she would never use. She didn't care about that kind of stuff to begin with. It meant a lot less now that the bills had grown.

"Kagome…that's your money. We'll be fine." Yes she was worried, but it didn't mean she was going to take her daughter's paycheck! She would manage. Even if it kept getting harder to maintain the shrine, or make money with the few visitors Sunset Shrine had.

"Mom, I live here too. It's my fault Sesshoumaru is currently living here as well. Both of us cost money to keep around. Take it. Or I'll stuff it in your bank account when you're not looking." Kagome glared at her mom. She meant that last part. Somehow, she was going to help, whether her mom wanted her to or not. She knew what was going on. No more cover-ups or brush-offs. This was getting serious. Adding Sesshoumaru to the 'family' only meant that things had come to a head sooner than they would have otherwise. And that was her fault.

Mrs. Higurashi sighed. "I…could use the help. It is hard. You're right. But…that's your money!" She protested, hands flat on the tabletop. It just wasn't right…

"And you're my family. Pretend I got you all a** lot** of ice cream or something as a treat." Kagome smiled warmly "I live here, and it's because of me Sesshoumaru is here too. Nothing against me helping you out."

"Alright. You win." Mrs. Higurashi sighed and slumped back in her seat, defeated. She was always tired these days. She had her own job to worry about, something that didn't pay much, but brought in enough to _just_ maintain the buildings. It was expensive to run a shrine these days. The grounds had to be kept clean, the buildings kept up…and they took more maintaining than most buildings because of their age. The shrine itself made next to nothing. Her father had made more than a few bad business choices lately. Then, there were the bills for their actual house…

Aside from all that, they had to find a way to keep the extensive grounds maintained. Her father couldn't do it alone, and shouldn't even be allowed to do part of it. He was getting quite fragile in his old age. Rheumatism and osteoporosis meant he shouldn't be out sweeping sidewalks. But it would kill him if they had to leave the shrine, so they had to get someone to look after it.

Kagome's job meant she couldn't maintain the grounds the way she had before becoming an intern. Souta wouldn't be able to do it by himself either, if he could pull himself away from his electronics long enough. Mrs. Higurashi didn't trust him with hedge clippers anyway, not after that time he almost lost a finger. She couldn't do maintenance all the time because of work. Souta had no idea what was going on with the bills anyway. She hadn't mentioned that to him. He was too young to need to know.

Maybe if they all divided the cleaning…it might be made to work. They would try that before she resorted to hiring someone with their dwindling funds. The shrine had to be maintained, or they would get even fewer visitors than they did now. It was something that desperately needed doing.

"Thanks mom. It'll get better soon. You'll see." Kagome smiled encouragingly and headed off in the direction of the futon. Her mom might be tired, but so was she. Work again tomorrow…what joy. What _fun_.

What a let-down…

Mrs. Higurashi hoped it would be that simple. She didn't share her daughter's optimism about the shrine. She couldn't imagine leaving it. Her father would be devastated…they all would be. This was their family heritage, an accumulation of generations of Higurashi's, and the thought of selling it to some greedy businessman, or even to the government, was more than she could bear. She had grown up here, and watched Kagome and Souta grow up in turn. Her father had lived here his whole life. There was no way she could leave it.

She might have to do just that.

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Sesshoumaru blinked, stunned. He'd typed in a few simple words, and he had gotten back a wealth of information on weapons.

Tanks. Poison gas. Nuclear weapons that could…and had…taken out entire _cities_, (not the small number of youkai in the city of Aizu, but millions of humans) made the surrounding area unlivable for years. Guns of every possible kind, size and strength. Intercontinental ballistic missiles.

How had humans made all this?

They shouldn't be able to…this kind of power…he was surprised they hadn't managed to kill themselves, or destroy the entire world. Youkai weren't good at restraint, but humans had even **less** when it came to fighting. With weapons like this, how had they managed to keep from killing themselves in endless war?

He was glad he hadn't decided to leave the shrine. He had known nothing of this then, and he probably would have acted as he had in the past. Then, the humans would have retaliated…and he wouldn't have been prepared for what they could do.

This was unnatural. A youkai…Taiyoukai…afraid of what humans could do. Not even humans with the training of an exterminator, or the purifying power of a miko or monk, but **ordinary people**. Ordinary people with firearms.

He was no fool .He feared many things to some degree, though most not much. He didn't show it, but he had sometimes been afraid in battle. Only a fool had no fear. A soon dead fool. A strong youkai just didn't let that fear rule him. A little fear to create caution was healthy, but no fear was deadly.

Overcoming your fear was what courage was. A fool with no fear who single handedly faced an army was no hero. Just a soon-lifeless idiot.

He knew the human's strength now, and knew he probably have to play by most of the rules in this world. He hadn't thought they applied to him, but the enforcement might bring him to their level.

This was just so unexpected…how was he to know that humans now controlled more power than most common youkai could harness? Enough humans against him, and there were always more to fill the ranks, and he'd be in serious trouble.

No wonder there were none of his kind in the area. Humans must have driven them out, or exterminated them. The fear humans so often felt for youkai would have led to calling in the exterminators sooner or later.

It was the normal human reaction. If something is strange, or more powerful, it becomes a 'monster.' What had been reduced to monster in the mind of men was nothing more than an animal, one that caused no qualms when killed. An enemy. Something to be feared, or defeated. With humans, there was no middle ground. Regardless of what the individual youkai had done, or not done, when the humans were on the hunt they didn't care. A pack of humans…the most dangerous mob.

Once, it had not been so. Before he'd been born, his kind had been dominant. They had been worshipped, and even loved. The humans had been unable to oppose even the weakest youkai.

Almost, he could see why the Purist's ideas were so popular. Almost. Some days, he even_ agreed_. Kill all the annoying humans, especially the ones that had appeared in the last few years, the ones with guns and a 'god'.

In his own lifetime, he'd seen the balance of power move slowly towards the humans. Only in retrospect did he see that shift, it was so minute. Until now, he hadn't even realized what was happening. The human priests and exterminators grew in number and talent. Humans were no longer the weak little insects they had once been. They still lived, and bred, like insects. But they had had a bigger sting at the time he was sealed…now…it was an _enormous_ sting.

He realized, looking back with the clarity of hindsight, that youkai had been dwindling even in his own time. Now, they were gone. Or if not gone, in hiding, fearful of being found out. Even the youkai lords must have fled, or hidden themselves among the humans.

Or died.

He hadn't really believed Kagome before when she had said there were no youkai about. He'd just thought she'd not looked hard enough. It wasn't that at all. There really _were_ no youkai.

She had been right.

Normally, an exterminator could only get rid of the lowest level youkai, perhaps stronger opponents if skilled. An exterminator with a gun could get rid of all but the strongest of youkai. Many exterminators with guns, ranged against one youkai… (Humans always seemed to travel in mobs. They were much stronger that way than individually) with enough humans facing it, that youkai would die regardless of how powerful it was. Of course…he was proud to think that it would take several armies of exterminators to bring _him_ down. Not that he was going to test that theory…

If he was to come against exterminators armed as such, even he could die. He would take a _great_ many people down with him…but he would probably die if they brought enough firepower against him. A single squad of machine guns might do it. He was stunned.

Sesshoumaru sat back in the odd chair, careful not to get his tail caught in the swiveling base. He'd done that once, and had no wish to repeat the experience.

Even if he went back to his own time…in a few hundred years, would he be back here? Stuck here? _Living_ here…?

It was a horrifying thought. A world in which strength of the individual in combat meant nothing. A world of machines. Of technology.

Of humans.

It was enough to make him wish for death in battle. It seemed every new thing he learned led to more questions, and drove the feeling of exile in deeper. Now more than ever, _this was not his world_. It was a world ruled by humans. It was no comfortable forest, where he knew the dangers, knew the freedoms.

It was an unknown, dangerous concrete jungle. And he was the ignorant intruder.

He had to get through that barrier, and soon. He hated being trapped here, in this house. It was far better than the last confinement…_infinitely_ better…but it was still a cage. He was confined to the grounds, or the tiny rooms of the house. He was reduced to dependence on the family that lived here, and to spending his days following the confusing cyber trail of information on Damia. He couldn't do things his way. He didn't know how things worked.

He would find out.

He was going to get though the barrier, and he was going to find out all he could about this world. It was hard to believe that it wasn't a new fiefdom, but his homeland. It was the same world.

Harder than ever to believe, now he knew about the weapons invented over the years.

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Kagome dragged herself up to her room to grab clothing for tomorrow. Sesshoumaru had migrated back to the computer, so she let him be. Her mom had told him about Grandpa coming home tomorrow, so Sesshoumaru wouldn't be too surprised when he showed up.

She wandered down the hallway. Sesshoumaru would be on his own again tomorrow…and she wanted to make **sure** he wasn't going to go snooping in places where it was unwise to snoop. Particularly her closet and the rest of her room, (she really **would** strangle him with his own tail if he went though her bras) or where they kept the cleaning chemicals.

Come to think of it, just opening some of those chemicals might knock him out…she remembered Inuyasha's reaction to the ink a painter had used. It hadn't done much other than give him a headache afterwards, but some of the stuff like paint remover could probably do a lot to Sesshoumaru. Like put him under for a long, long time. Or send him on one hell of an acid trip if he took too much of a whiff…

She wouldn't say everything to him…he was a smart guy, and he could take care of himself. But she would warn him not to go snooping like last time. He should know enough to hold in his curiously.

Kagome couldn't really fault him for being curious…when she was little, she'd wandered through people's houses when visiting, and she'd gotten lost exploring the art gallery. She'd even taken off to look at a construction site when she was four, and had gotten a couple of blocks before being found. She could understand…but he had to know it could be dangerous.

Kagome walked into Souta's room and leaned against the door frame.

Sesshoumaru turned his head briefly as she walked in, and flicked off the screen.

"Hey…I'm going to bed soon, and I thought I'd remind you that you're on your own again tomorrow. Try not to get into trouble with the computer or go exploring again. I'm sure no reminder of what could happen is needed."

Sesshoumaru would keep himself under control…mostly. There were a few things on the computer that he was going to look at though. Surely that was fine…

"No reminder needed."

"Ok…'cause some of the stuff in this house would kill you. You've got a sensitive nose, and it could knock you out if you open anything strong smelling. And some of it **is** poisonous. I just want to make sure."

She was treating him like a child. It irritated him. He had said he wasn't going to look around. She had said nothing about the computer, but anything else was off limits. Idiot girl…he'd already said he was going to keep from looking about, and she kept belaboring the point…

Didn't say much, did he? Even when after Tetsusaiga he'd been a quiet person. Most of the comments made went along the lines of 'Die, Inuyasha!' Or, 'Give me the sword!' Not the best way to judge character.

Why did Sesshoumaru want the sword so badly anyway? Yet one more mystery. One she could soon fix by asking …she really was as bad as Souta. "Ok. Just so long as that's clear. And…I have a question for you." Kagome's eyes smiled. Souta had come by his curiosity honestly. He'd learned it from her in the first place. "Why did you always want Inuyasha's sword so badly? There must be a good reason for you to have chased us around so much."

...Where had that come from? She never ceased to puzzle him.

There was a reason…several reasons…but he didn't feel like talking to the nosy wench at this point. She'd lectured him far too much as it was, and now, she was starting in on questioning him just like Souta had. Questions he had no intentions of answering fully, if at all.

"He didn't deserve it. It was mine."

It had been Sesshoumaru's, at one point. He would not stoop to stealing. It had once been his, and he was reclaiming what was his own. Father had promised him the most powerful sword he could give his firstborn son. Obviously, that was the Tetsusaiga, although recently he had begun to doubt that. Father must have reconsidered at some point, and given Sesshoumaru the Tenseiga instead once it was clear the Dog Lord would have another son.

And there was the other, larger reason. Inuyasha himself…he didn't precisely hate him, but rather, what he represented. Fathers sins, and the neglect that Izaoi had brought with her. His father had had no time for anything but Izaoi after she came into his life. A far cry from his first mate, her hand given in an arranged union. He'd hardly known she existed. With Inuyasha's mother, he had had no time for his land, or his son, or even his enemies…

Sesshoumaru closed his eyes, as images rose uncalled behind magenta marked skin.

_**A small funeral procession wound away in the snow, leaving the newly buried Agemaki behind. She was left in the frozen, consuming earth alone. 'Mother…' **_

_A blue-white silhouette left him further behind, leading the mourners behind him, away. Only a few minutes and he'd moved on. Sesshoumaru shivered slightly, tail fluffed out against the winter's cold breath. He rubbed his small hands together, watching his cousin smirk and flip her long black and blue hair, before she too walked away, leaving him alone._

_Mother…. Now he'd never he'd a chance to know her… he blinked, determined not to cry. He didn't. They remained inside, frozen against his eyes._

_He would not cry._

_Sesshoumaru stood against the wind, watching the last of the funeral party vanish into whiteness._

_A lonely, stuttering flute wailed against the snow._

It had killed him in the end. Father had brought his own, well deserved doom. He blinked, and shoved it all away. He couldn't let the past govern him. It had done so to a dangerous degree already.

No. Kagome need not know any of these reasons. He'd be damned if he'd tell a human his life story.

"Tell me something new. You always said he didn't deserve it. You really wanted to kill him for that?" She found it hard to believe. Was there nothing _else _to this

Sesshoumaru closed his eyes. She really **was** a nosy, annoying wench. He'd had enough of this. "Yes. Now go away."

He wanted to be alone to think about all the things he'd discovered online, about weapons. He didn't need some overtly curious girl poking her nose into his private life, or getting in the way. He'd been fairly lenient up till now, simply because she'd done so much for him. However, that would no longer hold him back if she kept asking him questions he wouldn't answer.

Pompous asshole. Kagome turned and left, puzzled. Did he really mean that? How could someone kill a member of their family because they 'weren't worthy'? She had a feeling there was more to this than what Sesshoumaru let on. A lot more. But he was a good actor. She couldn't tell if what he said meant anything to him or not. She didn't know if he was telling her the truth behind that pretty poker face.

Stupid Fluffy…She laughed. Now,_ there_ was a nickname **guaranteed** to annoy him. She would have to use it in all dealings with him thereafter. In the dark, Kagome gave the wall an evil grin. "Goodnight Fluffy-sama" she whispered mockingly, getting comfortable on her spare futon.

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Kagome stumbled down the hallway in the dark, feet weighted with vague dreams of clinging purple. The house was always so quiet in the middle of the night, aside from the hum and drone of the city. Tokyo never slept. Her empty water glass clinked on the bathroom sinks she fumbled for the faucet, finally finding it in the gloom. No one should be up at 3 in the morning, yet here she was...

Mission to find watery substance accomplished, she started shuffling back the way she'd come, pausing briefly as the sound of movement from Sesshoumaru's room drew her fuzzy attention. She frowned at the door, wondering. As far as she knew, Sesshoumaru slept like a log, not moving around. Inuyasha was a bit like that. But then…she might be wrong about his sleeping habits, since all she really had to go on was the past few days, when he'd been sleeping far more than normally.

Or maybe, he was just awake, like she was. Without thinking too hard about her actions, she walked over to her former room and pushed at the door.

White sheets spilled across the floor, even paler against the dark carpet in the light from the moon. Waves, no doubt made by a restless tail, crisscrossed over them. Sesshoumaru had managed to denude the bed of all but a pillow near the end, and had curled up into the corner, sleeping fitfully. He'd surrounded himself with his tail, wrapped protectively in it. Only the occasional dark of pajamas peeked out from the fortress, and his uncovered face… in sleep, all masks had dropped. What little she could see of his screwed shut eyes astounded her, shocked her to the core.

He looked deathly afraid.

A hand twitched, and she blinked, reminding her abruptly that she was an intruder, that she was staring like an idiot. But that look…she felt sorry for him, even though she knew he wouldn't appreciate it in the least.

What was he dreaming of? A nightmare…?

Her mother had always known when she needed waking, when Kagome was little. She'd get her up and calm her down, stay by her side till she slept soundly, chasing the dark fears of night away like a mounted, noble Paladin.

It only seemed right Kagome should return the favor, and wake Sesshoumaru up now. She doubted he'd want her to stay around till he fell asleep again, somehow. Or thank her for her troubles. But it was the right thing to do. A small kindness, even if unnoticed.

She took a deep breath, and waded carefully through the piles of covers on the floor, settling her water on the desk beside a softly sleeping Shiro.

Steeling herself, she gingerly reached across the bare mattress towards his nearest shoulder, silently praying she wouldn't be mauled for her pains.

"Wake up…come on, wake up…it's only a dream…"

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_He shivered against the cold, stony walls, not sure if it was still light outside, or not. The tiny closet had no windows to let him know. To him, it was a cubicle of stone and shadow, nearly a perpetual twilight._

_He shivered again, trying to warm himself up by rubbing his arms and curling tighter into his hated corner. Why did she always have to leave him in here? As punishments for children went, it supposedly wasn't as bad as skipping supper or being beaten (from _**_her_**_ point of view) He would have preferred either to this, actually. He'd rather have skipped a _**_week's_**_ worth of dinners than be stuck for even ten minutes in this tiny cell._

_He wasn't sure exactly why mother had put him in here this time. Hadn't he done well enough with his lessons? Hadn't he? He'd tried very hard this time. He'd spent all his time learning to read and write, to do sums…and, of course, practicing her lessons on music._

_All he'd done was try, in his high pitched child's voice, to finally please mother with the skills she'd taught him. All he wanted was for mother to smile, instead of setting her mouth in an odd, unreadable curve and_ _earn himself another eternity in the dark._

_He rubbed his arms harder, chilled and slightly nervous. He was freezing, yet it felt stuffy, as though the walls, invisible to his eyes (though not his hands) would snap together at any moment, smothering him. They were inching closer…any minute, he'd be able to reach out and touch the opposite stone blocks. Then, they would keep creeping closer, and eventually stifle him. He reached down, and laid his palm against the smooth, carved stone, felt the rough places where the blocks had been shaped by a chisel, reassuring himself, in a small way, that they hadn't moved._

_How long had he been here now? He fidgeted, youngster's fear of the dark momentarily pushed aside by irritation. Had they forgotten him for good, this time?_

_He shuddered as that horrible thought took over his mind. They'd leave him here for ever, this time, alone in the dark…_

_Something just below the edge of hearing rumbled, and his stomach flipped over instinctively. What was…?_

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Kagome shook his shoulder a little harder, whispering at him to wake up, stop dreaming, it was only a nightmare. She grimaced as he ignored her. Why wouldn't he wake up, like he was supposed to?

He didn't seem to notice her poking him in the side, thoroughly trapped in his own little world…

_The sounds grew louder, wrenching at his delicate ears and echoing off the walls in eerie midnight. An earth shattering groan escaped the floor, and stones buckled without warning beneath him. He gasped in sudden fright, child's eyes wide. What was going on?_

_His breathing picked up speed, and he pressed himself blindly into a corner, staring around in blind panic, frightened of what might come out of the dark. The walls twitched menacingly against his back, sending grinding, booming noises right _**_through_**_ his chest to reverberate in his ribs, in his head, against a heart already wild with fear._

_They were closing in! It was …it was an earthquake! He shouted wordlessly, voice lost against the deeper growl of the earth. He was going to be crushed, be buried alive, he'd be suffocated miles away from anyone, left to die, no one was coming, nobody would miss him, they wouldn't care anyway…_

_He struggled vainly, trying to claw at the walls, to burst out and _**_away_**_ from it all. He tried to pound them, break them, smash them to bits on his way _**_out_**_…anything! His nurse had always said he'd be strong when he was older…he didn't care about older, but he needed out _**_now_**

_The walls rippled, throwing him back to the mercy of the floor. He distantly heard the shattering of stone, dully cracking on the edge of perception, as though pieces had fallen from the ceiling. It was caving in! It was going to fall on him! Nervousness rushed though his body, tingling, _**_burning, flaming into full blown panic._**

_He whipped his head around wildly, trying to hear over the roaring, trying to see though the dark in vain. He wished he could just _**_see_**_, frantically stumbling, searching in the dark with his bruised hands. The walls and floor moved beneath his fingers, and he whimpered, scared they would come up and claw at him._

_He shook like a leaf, legs weak with fear, and nearly screamed in terror as something sharp came howling out of the dark, clipping him across the forehead and sending pain shooting through his skull. He clapped a hand to his head, feeling something warm and wet, gritty with the dust on his fingers, in his pale hair, dripping down into his eyes. Blood. He backed up, terrified, only able to take a step before meeting the grinding wall, the light touch frightening him into a panicky yell. He coughed, choking on the dust raining down on him, stinging as it crept into his eyes, his lungs, into the gash on his scalp. He was suffocating…_

_The walls were closing in…they'd crush him! …They were going to get him, out for his blood, they'd already nearly killed him, he would die here, no one was coming, they'd clean forgotten him, forgotten him in the dark, hate the dark, don't want to die, _**_nobody was going to save him_**

_**They were going to let him die alone…in the dark…**_

_He huddled in the center of the room, as far away from walls as possible, quaking in time to the floor, shaking with dry sobs. He clutched his head, not noticing he was crying, not noticing he was rocking against the heaving floor. He cried out for anyone, someone, nurse, no, nurse is dead, someone, _**_mother_**_, come find me!_

…_come find me…_

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He rolled over, mouth moving silently, still trapped in a world of cobwebs.

"Come on…wake up…Please…?" Kagome winced, sure that he was going to be furious when he did wake up. He muttered something just within her range of hearing.

"…please…please come find me…"

Kagome stared, and finally resorted to desperate measures. She pinched him. Hard.

It must have done the trick, because seconds later, two pale yellow eyes were looking right at her.

"What are you doing?" He stared intently, and Kagome was suddenly highly embarrassed to be caught in the middle of the night, wearing only pajamas, in his room.

"Ah…you were…that is…um…you were having a nightmare... and I woke you up…" Kagome stood up straight, letting her hand drop to her side. Sesshoumaru said nothing, but if possible, his stare intensified, boring into her accusingly, as though to say 'what are you doing here? As if I should need your help…'

She took a step back, blushing invisibly in the shadows. "I thought it was the nice thing to do."

"I see." How had she known? What had brought her here, at this hour? He was rather grateful at the moment, but would never show it. That would give the impression that he didn't mind the intrusion, which was exactly what he wanted to avoid…

Why had she been sneaking around for? He caught sight of the water glass she was reaching for, and sighed. So she'd heard him and come running after going for water, had she?

He was pathetic. Weak willed. Letting a human girl be his savior, allowing her to see his moment of fear…

Kagome winced, feeling the absolute embarrassment that comes of being in a strange man's room at night, unannounced. "Right. I think…I'm going back to bed…"

He watched her go, eyes following every move. When the door had closed behind her, he sighed, letting go the breath that had been held inside, feeling the hot air of the stuffy room closing in, and willing it away. He wasn't afraid. He wasn't!

Maybe if he said that often enough, he'd believe it…

He hadn't dreamt up something _that_ bad for a long time. That Kagome had been the one to wake him up from a _nightmare_ was only adding insult to mortal wounds. He shivered. Why was the window closed? So stuffy…

Gods…that closet…cell from hell…

It was no excuse. He forced himself to sit still, back straight as the flat of a blade, and took a breath, listening to Kagome settling in downstairs. He would not touch the window, even if the night air would be welcome. He couldn't bear thinking that it had been a human who saved his sorry hide.

_Save_ him…hah.

He did not want to have_ anyone_ see him weakened, least of all her. Wasn't being at her mercy _enough_? He gritted his teeth angrily. Now she even had to 'rescue' him from himself…

He stopped, aware that he was being an idiot. He was glaring so hard at the wall it might just burst into flames in a moment…

Sesshoumaru took a deep breath, and held it, falling into the deep breathing of patterns, trying to calm down. Something to take his thoughts away from certain events…

He had to be still within. He had to be ice. There was nothing else for him. Empty, perfect mask. Couldn't he at least get that right? His breathing slowed, and he willed it to fall into the background, normalcy of breath so even it barely registered till one thought of it.

Calm.

He absently surveyed the mess of sheets on the floor and decided to fix them up, trying to get his mind off _anything_ but the here and now. He started attempting to put the covers back on one handed. Put the sheets on first. Then the covers. Get your tail out of the way. Where's the pillow…?

Occupy himself.

He glanced at Shiro, and then out the window, sitting on a militarily straight, well made bed. Watch the window…watch the moon travel the sky…don't think about how stuffy it is in here…

It was better than lying sleeplessly in the dark. Or falling back into the realm of nightmare.

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_There! Nice long chapter for you, since I'm back from the island vacation thing. Lol. Had tons of fun, even if there was no internet. Sand, sun, and I actually have the faintest of tans. Hopefully, you like this chapter. It's opening up some interesting quirks I've put in here, for later. (grin)_

_Thanks to everyone who reviewed last chapter. And…_

_With that said…I invite you to review this ch. (hopefully not to yell at me about not updating while on vacation! lol) Or, to step aside to the websites, links on authors page. I've just updated the layout on the one for graphics too. _

_--D.B Sidhe_


	10. ch 9 : Paper Walls

**: Paper Walls :**

Sesshoumaru glared at the dead computer screen in frustration. Typing in a description of Damia had given him thousands of results…but typing in just her name, or Mesau's, had given him almost a hundred thousand entries. He'd looked at them a bit, but he'd only gotten to about 50.

He didn't want to think about what had happened when he'd clicked on the _last_ entry. Something about triple x, and Damia…Pop-ups with pictures of some rather scantily clad people had made the computer give off a funny whirling noise as the screen exploded in advertisements, hiding the normal window he was used to completely.

He'd stared in horror, disgusted. What had he done? He hadn't meant to do anything like that! They kept coming, and he'd tried closing them…(what on earth was something like **that** doing on a computer? He had never, ever wanted to see that much …) but everything he'd done had only resulted in more pop-ups.

Finally, he'd just hit the on/off switch in desperation. He'd leave the computer alone for now…too dangerous…

What had just happened? He pushed himself off the chair, and went to Kagome's room to think about it.

Apparently, sticking one's nose just anywhere on the internet could result in trouble if you didn't know what was going on. Nothing new…in his own time, if you decided to get caught in the middle of a battle without knowing much of combat, you had a lot more trouble to worry about than the vicious swarm of pop-ups he'd roused.

He listened as the door clicked and was unlocked downstairs, then got up to see if Kagome's grandfather was the person entering the house. Mrs. Higurashi was supposed to have been home early, after driving up-island to get her father.

He watched from the bottom of the stairs and Mrs. Higurashi struggled to haul a large bag into the house, and then moved it closer. What kind of bag – or box - was that? It had little wheels on it…ingenious.

"Hi, Sesshoumaru…I-"

Nothing could have prepared him for what happened next. An old man came barreling out from behind Mrs. Higurashi, paper between his fingers and a slightly wild look in his eyes.

"Begone, dem-"

Sesshoumaru stood frozen as the old man advanced on him, then dodged and grabbed the old mans skinny wrist, eyes blazing. They were not going to imprison him again. She wouldn't. He wouldn't let Damia kill him all over again!

The hallway disappeared into a red mist, overlaid with the meadow he'd buried Rin in. Never let them win again, kill them both before that happened…

He would die before he let the two bitches do that to him. He knew Damia been out to kill him anyway, but he had never understood what had gone wrong, why he'd been made into living stone. She hadn't known either, judging from the curses he'd heard afterwards. Mesau had had a lot to answer for. She'd promised her arts could kill him, hadn't she? Served her right, the traitor. The miko had been sure he would be dead, and so had he. Neither expected what had come of her meddling.

But he knew one thing…he would kill, or be killed, before he ever went though that again...

He glared death at them both, enraged. Damia was enjoying this far too much. Even when young, she'd had a cruel streak a mile wide, always after him. All this time…had she really plotted against him this long? From the depths of her cozy position in his service? He'd never known her dislike ran that deep. He should have guessed, should have asked where she had gone all those times, questioned her connections to Mesau. Murdering, treasonous pair of upstarts. She was laughing at him…!

Mrs. Higurashi watched in shock as Sesshoumaru's eyes glowed, fierce suns, and he dug his fingers into her father's wrist sharply. What had the old man gotten himself into now? Sesshoumaru looked angry…one of the first expressions she'd seen on his face, and the red that had begun to bleed into his eyes couldn't be good. And…? What was that? Fear…?

"Father! I told you not to do that!" she called. Hopefully, it was all just a little misunderstanding that they could clear up soon…she hoped.

Who was that? It wasn't Damia speaking, wasn't Mesau…Sesshoumaru realized he'd lost himself. He blinked, and came back to the present as the unfamiliar voice broke though the red crawling over his vision. He realized he was holding the old man's wrist in a death grip, and growling under his breath. He blinked again to clear his vision completely, and then dropped the terrified old man's arm, completely disgusted with himself.

Why had he lost it like that? There was no reason for him to throw a fit because of some stupid piece of paper with scribbles on it…!

It wasn't even a real scroll!

Living here had made him soft…

The old man rubbed his wrist, face still holding traces of fear. "You didn't need to kill my hand you know!" He backed up as Sesshoumaru glared at him, then disappeared up the stairs.

Why had that happened? Sesshoumaru felt he was loosing his grip…ever since he'd been set free, he'd been afraid…what had Damia done to him? What had he done to himself…? He wasn't who he had been. He knew it, and he hated it…Damia…

Why was he spiraling so far out of control…?

Mrs. Higurashi sighed as the last bit of tail disappeared upstairs. "I told you he was here, and I told you he didn't need an exorcism. Is it any wonder that happened?" She really had no sympathy for father. If he was going to try to exorcise a guest, she felt he deserved the dirty look he'd gotten. She rather felt like giving him one herself right now.

"Look at what he did to my wrist! He almost broke it!" Sakura Higurashi's father held up his arm indignantly. That youkai had made indentations of his fingers in his skin! He was going to have a huge bruise there…one was already starting to form, in fact!

"It's still your own fault. I even asked you specifically **not** to get out all the scrolls…" When would father learn? Inuyasha hadn't liked having useless scraps of paper pasted on him. She hadn't thought Sesshoumaru would either…and he hadn't liked it. He'd reacted even worse than Inuyasha, actually. Inuyasha hadn't hurt her father. She would have to apologize to him later, since he'd seemed upset or angry (he was so hard for her to read.)…and ask him to take no notice.

The sad fact was, her father was slowly going senile…but this last year he'd really started to go downhill. At least all he'd gotten for his pains had been a bruise. She had the feeling Sesshoumaru could have done a lot worse to him.

"Some daughter you are, Sakura. You don't care at all!" He groused, still massaging his wrist. "You didn't just have some stupid youkai squeeze your wrist to death!"

Sakura Higurashi ignored him, and finished bringing in the luggage.

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Sesshoumaru stayed in his room. He didn't want to go outside and have to see the person who'd tried to stick paper on him.

Even if the scroll had been a fake, it had still managed to bring back that day in the meadow. He still didn't understand what had happened to him there. At Damia's urging, the scroll Mesau had used on him ought to have killed him, but it hadn't. Mesau had said something to Damia after about why, but he couldn't remember what, nor did he want to.

He knew that a normal sealing was different from what he'd gone though. Normally, the person sealed had no concept of time passing. They didn't have to watch spider webs being built on their nose. He also knew full well he ought to have died back then. Damia had been quite serious about wanting him dead. So then, why wasn't he…?

In some ways, he'd wanted to be.

He…he had had to 'live' though everything. Imprisonment. Insomnia. Immobility. Damia's mocking voice echoing in the dark. He'd distantly heard as she berated the pet miko who'd helped her behind his inert stone head, and listened in rage as she debated what to do with his stone body afterwards. He might not have been able to move, but he was forced to stay awake with all his senses intact and listen to her plotting. And he was fully capable of falling into a murderous rage as she did so. He just couldn't do anything about it, which made him even angrier…

He had numbed after a while…thankfully so, in some ways.

Damia had attacked him when he was off guard. He'd been sitting with a few flowers for Rin's new grave, thinking back on some of the more happy moments, and she'd come from behind and partially immobilized him, also with the help of Mesau's dark arts.

He'd heard her recount of Rin's death, and seethed as she told him how Mesau had impersonated a servant to murder her. He had never known her hate ran that deep. She'd always been cruel, though at least Mesau had had the grace to look disgusted with killing innocents. (How dare she impersonate one of his servants to kill Rin? How dare she kill Rin at all, or even _think_ of doing such a thing! Mesau was betraying her own kind to stand beside Damia. She must have known her mistress was a Purist, even if he hadn't, until too late.)

He hadn't known till Damia gloated over his half crouched form that it had been _her_, making those plans... He had suspected those outside his home, not within it. _She_ was ultimately Rin's murderer. He hated her for that, even aside from what had happened to him next…

Damia had decided the time to gloat was past, and had ordered Mesau to strike out with a second scroll, real that time, not like the one the old man had come at him with. She had meant to purify him to death when he couldn't fight back. She'd always been a general who sat back and watched, instead of leading the charge. Practical. Cool. Calculating, and not willing to take unnecessary risks by freeing him.

The searing light of the scroll had taken him, and he'd been knocked out for a few minutes. On wakening, he'd heard them arguing. The miko had been angry with herself, and Damia had simply pointed out that it was Mesau's fault for not making the scroll strong enough. He hadn't heard Mesau's retort. Then, Damia had wondered aloud what to do with the stony Sesshoumaru.

Perhaps then was when he'd stared to feel fear.

He still felt that fear, obviously. He had been afraid just now. Afraid of a return to an imprisonment much worse than being confined to the shrine and its grounds.

Fear was healthy in small doses of sense. But not this. He would not let this fear rule him. He could not let it control him. He could not be a slave to his fear. But in his heart, he knew he was. He wasn't free at all…

He decided he'd go downstairs, to wait till the rest of the family arrived home from wherever they spent their days. Souta was at school, whatever school was. He didn't know where Kagome went. He would face the old man again…there was nothing scary about a feeble old man with a piece of paper. Nothing at all…so why had he reacted like that?

He was being ridiculous…

He heard arguing in the kitchen, and he decided to listen from the living room. It was hard not to hear what was being said anyway, even without his excellent hearing. Sesshoumaru padded quietly over to the couch and sat down stiffly. It still seemed odd to sit in a piece of furniture, and not on a proper cushion.

"I already told you, it's your own fault! I don't want you trying that again!"

"But Sakura, you're not going to let him stay here, are you? Inuyasha didn't, he always left. He was scared of my spells, no doubt." The old man's voice carried a hint of pride.

Sesshoumaru snorted. The old man was delusional. His spells had no more power than the paper they were written on, or the ink they wasted. Sakura…was that the woman – Kagome's mother's - name?

"Do I need to _hide_ the papers? Give it up father…Kagome will be unhappy you went after Sesshoumaru already. Does she need to hear about a second or a third time?"

"You wouldn't dare, Sakura!"

"Yes, I would. Just let it go." A sigh followed these words, and both voices fell silent.

Sakura must be Kagome's mother…and the old man must be her grandfather. It sounded like the old man was going to leave him alone for the time being. A good decision on the old man's part. Clearly, no one knew how close he'd been to death. A few moments longer, and he would have done something…regrettable.

He would probably have been told to leave if he'd killed Kagome's grandfather. He didn't enjoy being dependant on the Higurashi family, but it was better than being on his own for the time being, or he'd have left already no matter what Kagome wanted.

He watched as Sakura made her way out of the kitchen to the living room.

"Oh…you're out here. Did you hear all that…?" She winced, and said, a little softer, "Father's not a bad person. He just gets…stuck on a few things. He thinks youkai shouldn't come into shrines. Silly, but I guess when you're as old as he is, you get a little silly. He sometimes has trouble remembering things too..."

Youkai weren't supposed to come into shrines? That was quite wrong. He'd known of more than a few shrine keepers or exterminators who had made partnerships with youkai. Hypocritical, since they were asked to kill other youkai, but it had been done. He himself would never have done so, but some had. Mesau and Damia were working together, for starters. Miko and youkai, hand in hand. Soul for power, power for a soul.

Where had the idea that youkai couldn't enter shrines come from? Or, come to think of it, the idea that one should attack any youkai on sight? That was ridiculous. The majority of youkai would leave humans alone if they were not bothered, while most _would_ attack if provoked. Silly old man indeed…

"I see. He will not try that again."

"I hope not…but if he does, please forgive him. He's not always reasonable. It does no harm, apart from being annoying."

No harm? She must not have _any_ idea how close to death her father had blundered. He would be able to control himself now, but he hadn't then. If she had said nothing, he wouldn't have hesitated for that one, crucial second. He still felt uneasy at the thought of living with someone who might take it into their head to attack him with fake scrolls at any time.

It would be rather nervous for a while. He really didn't want the blood of Kagome's family on his hands, not when they'd done all they had. It would not be right.

"Yes." He sighed slightly. This family wasn't bad, for humans. Certainly, after all they'd done for him, killing would feel wrong. They were on the _very_ top of his short 'not to be killed' list.

Yes, they would be safe. He would not allow that…lapse…again. It was not to be tolerated. They were quite safe from him. He hoped….no, he _knew. _He'd just have to do better.

"Thanks. I hope he doesn't take it into his head to try that again, but one never knows." Much as she loved her father, he was being ridiculous. He really was starting to get a little vague, and forgetful. He was growing old…it was sad. She remembered him as a father in the prime of life, always full of energy. It was always a shock to see him, and wonder at the grey in his hair, or the new wrinkles. Sad, but what could she do? She couldn't, that was the thing. Just couldn't make him young again…

The door creaked, and Kagome walked in. She stopped as her mom came over and smiled. "Home early today?"

"Yeah…the drill sergeant was sick, so Chihero was in charge. She's a lot more lenient." Kagome made a face, and her mom laughed a little. She'd heard a lot about the 'drill sergeant' since Kagome started working.

Kagome tossed her coat in the closet, and smiled as her grandfather came out of the kitchen. She leaned over and gave him a hug. "Great to see you grandpa! Was the trip back ok?"

"Not too bad." Her grandpa glared in the direction of the living room "The welcome was lacking, though."

Kagome raised her eyebrows, and her mom sighed. "We just went over this. It was your own fault, I warned you, and it could have been worse. Get over it."

What was going on? "What happened?" Was something wrong or…oh dear. She hadn't thought…Grandpa must not like having Sesshoumaru around…she winced as said Sesshoumaru wandered over from the living room.

"He attacked me!" Her grandpa pointed an accusing finger at Sesshoumaru. The icy youkai raised an eye-brow ever so slightly.

"As I recall, you were the one who tried to exorcise me with ordinary paper."

"Ordinary…?" Her grandpa's jaw worked soundlessly. He always did like to think of himself as the powerful shrine keeper…

She'd forgotten to warn Sesshoumaru about her grandpa's exorcism habits, hadn't she? She'd hoped he'd have had the sense to not try that on a guest, but apparently she'd been wrong. Oh dear…this really _was_ a mess. She had to tell grandpa not to do that anymore. She hadn't mentioned to anyone but Hojo what sort of youkai Sesshoumaru really was. They must have assumed he was like his brother. That he wouldn't mind some of the things they did, or did not, do. Oh dear…

Look on the bright side. Nobody was dead. No blood on the carpet. Hooray for that.

"Grandpa…please don't do that again. Inuyasha always hated it when you did that. It took him ages to get the glue off. Just think how you'd feel if someone jumped on you with a piece of paper for no reason!" Hopefully that would stick, and he would leave Sesshoumaru alone. It was for his own good.

Her grandpa huffed, but eventually gave up trying to convince the rest of his family to get rid of the 'pest.'

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Souta got home from school, and opened the front door. He blinked as Sesshoumaru came into view at the top of the stairs holding one of his swords.

He shrugged and watched as the tall youkai made his way past him, and out into the courtyard, instead going in to say hi to his grampa.

He'd been gone up-island for ages, and Souta had missed having him around. He'd promised to teach Souta chess soon too…

"Hi! I'm so glad you're home!" Souta smiled brightly.

"Hello! Miss me? It was great to visit everyone over in Ojiya, but I'm glad I'm back here." He gave Souta a big grin. Kagome poked her head into the kitchen, and saw her brother.

"Back already? I thought you were going to go play some weird game at someone's house…" She had enough problems keeping track of her own twisted schedule, let alone everyone else's. But she'd been sure he was going somewhere…

"That's tomorrow." Souta explained patiently with the calmness of the all knowing teen. His sister really needed more than 128 MB of ram in her head. That way, she could remember everything… "Where was Sesshoumaru going?"

"What? He wasn't going anywhere…. He isn't supposed to, at least!"

"See! Told you he's bad news!" Grampa shouted over his shoulder. That would show them to trust strange youkai!

Kagome and Souta ignored this.

"He had his sword, and he was going in the direction of the courtyard. Why?" Kagome didn't hear him as she ran out the front door.

Idiot…hadn't she said not to go outside? Unless…maybe he was going to try and open the stupid barrier again…

He still shouldn't be outside! Someone would notice him…Kagome raced into the courtyard, and then pulled up short. She stared.

There was Sesshoumaru, in the middle of the courtyard, going though a series of forms with his sword, like a blur of liquid silk.

With an _audience_.

The two little old ladies who'd stopped to watch smiled as Kagome ran over and stopped.

"I didn't know they had performances here…that girl really know what she's doing with a sword."

"Maybe…but look what she's done to her hair and her face! Young people these days…" a wrinkled frown accompanied this, while the old woman grumbled about the 'Getups you saw on people, honestly! When I was young they would never have allowed tattoos, no sir, they wouldn't have let you out of the house like that…'

Kagome gulped. So they thought he was some sort of performer…and a girl…she felt as though she might break out in slightly hysterical laughter at any moment. People were so good at seeing the things they wanted to see it was frightening.

"Do they have any scheduled events here? I'd love to come and watch." The other woman asked Kagome. Souta just stood behind her and watched, eyes bright. Wow…Sesshoumaru knew a lot! He was so cool…he'd kick ass against a horde of Uruk-hai any day!

Now…if only he could get Sesshoumaru to let him have his swords…or better yet,_ teach_ him…

"Um…no…Sesshoumaru was just practicing…I think…" Kagome tried to smile, and her face twitched. Just practicing….for which he was going to get himself in hot water…

"Oh…what a pity." The woman who'd spoken smiled, and watched as Sesshoumaru elegantly moved from one form into the next.

Kagome stood, wanting to drop though the floor as the two old women wandered down the stairs to the street below, talking amongst themselves. What had she done as a previous incarnation to deserve this…?

Maybe she didn't want to know. '_Oh…shit…what did my past self **do**? Kikyou…' _

She supposed she should be thankful that Sesshoumaru hadn't decided to practice with his lightning whip, or various ways of jumping over buildings. Yet. What he was doing now was inhumanly graceful, but it could at least be considered kendo practice to some extent. Sort of. If you didn't know what it was supposed to be….

What had he been thinking? He was outside, in broad daylight, running though practices…thank goodness they'd thought he was some sort of performer…or she…Kagome giggled, slightly nervously. They hadn't thought him anything other than an odd girl, a teen, practicing with a sword.

How could anyone be so blind…? She had been sure she'd been found out.

"I thought you were going to stay inside?" she asked in a slightly strangled voice, wishing Souta would stop clapping. It completely spoiled the effect.

"One does not wish to stay inside all day. I was warming up before looking at the barrier." The nerve of her. True, he had promised to stay inside, but he had been sure she would let him out to try and break through. He disliked too much' inside' at once. The rules about going outside to see this barrier had been a grey area and he hadn't wanted to ask, in case she said no. He wasn't about to _ask_ for the ok from her anytime soon. Getting **permission** from a human to go outside…how low he had sunk…

So he'd just gone. She couldn't say no if she didn't know. Sesshoumaru had kept to the letter of the law.

"…Oh. O…k…" Kagome paused. She **had** implied that he could go and look any time, hadn't she? "Well…just try to be more careful about hiding next time, ok?"

"Oh, come on…he could do a show!" Souta grinned "Or teach me to do one!"

Both adults ignored him, and he pouted.

He was not going to hide himself because of some old, noisy humans. _Stupid_ humans. They had called him a girl…and what was wrong with the way he looked? Nothing. Blind fools. He would almost rather stay inside than be reduced to hiding from humans outdoors. He had been out here long before they came, and he hadn't been about to go in again just because a few idiot humans happened to walk by him to watch. Besides…

"Sooner or later, I will be forced to see what this world is like beyond your home. This is something you can't prevent forever." As soon as he knew how everything worked, the only reason he'd come back would be for the well.

Kagome sighed. She had been treating him like a kid…one who resented the loss of accustomed freedom. He was right. She couldn't try and keep him inside forever. He had to hate it in there. "I guess…maybe we should talk about the kinds of things you could use to explain your tail, or the stripes. You heard how they were wondering about you. That way you could go out…"

Lie about his tail? What…ah.

There were no youkai, therefore no one here would be used to seeing someone with a tail, or marks of rank. To lie about his heritage to some rancid human…it was infuriating. But he could see why she thought he should do it. To fit in, and learn about the world he was in, and to be able to move around freely.

All well and good to go out like nothing had changed, and then not be able to get information from people because they thought him a 'monster youkai' of legend. Or a lunatic. He snorted softly. Idiots.

"I suppose I could try to make a rosary with an illusion on it…but I have no idea how that would work. All I know is that it's possible. I've never tried to make something like that, and the only idea I have is to imagine you as a normal person and tie the picture to the beads…." There had to be spare rosaries around here somewhere. She _did _live in a shrine after all…

That might be useful. A rosary could be used to produce such an effect, though she'd have to be careful not to purify him by accident. It was worth a try. He didn't really want to look like a human, but it would be preferable to getting odd looks of pity or questions. He wouldn't have to lie.

"Cool! You're going to do magic?" Souta grinned widely. Maybe he could ask her to enchant his gameboy so he need never use batteries again…Souta's eyes glazed over as he dreamed of the possibilities…

"**Try**, I said. We've got a gazzilion necklaces lying around grandpa keeps trying to foist off on tourists." Kagome smiled a bit. "I can borrow a few, I'm sure."

Sesshoumaru nodded. "You will try this later. First, I plan on getting back home." He turned around and headed for the mini shrine, both Higurashi's following him.

If he got though, he need never know the humiliation of wearing an illusion to make himself appear human. Or worse, lie about his birth. That was simply intolerable.

He knew this world was a strange one, and that he was a lone youkai in a sea of humanity. He would be forced, however unwillingly, into mimicking them to survive. He didn't like what was happening, but the logic was sound.

He hated this world.

He couldn't argue. He prided himself on his sense of reason, and however unfortunate, he didn't see anything wrong with Kagome's idea. Except with the actual looking human part…and he objected to that as a matter of pride, not reason. He hated to think he might be forced to pretend to be human.

Thank goodness he wasn't going to actually _be_ one, the way Inuyasha had been cursed with doing during the new moon. That would be horrible…

Hopefully, he could return to the feudal era before that illusion became a possibility. Go back home. Leave this miserable little shrine, and be free, truly free, for the first time in centuries. Maybe if he did that, he could loose his mind from the walls he had built there himself.

He walked down the set of stairs in the shrine slowly, and lifted his sword point. He hadn't been fully recovered the first time he tried to get through, and perhaps now it would be different. Perhaps. He wasn't certain.

Kagome held Souta back in the doorway, watching him. Souta's eyes were wide, and an excited grin decorated his face.

Souta nearly cheered when the sword was drawn back and brought down hard, but quieted when Kagome held her finger to her lips. Sesshoumaru probably didn't want an audience, and certainly not a noisily cheering one.

Blue fire wreathed the barrier, outlining it briefly before vanishing, purified to nothing by the power of the young miko's ward.

Even as it died, more blue flame crawled aver the dome to take its place, flickering like the northern aurora brought down to earth.

Air let out a hissing noise as it rushed in to fill the space vacated by the Taiyoukai's power. Sesshoumaru sent wave after wave of force straight at the transparent bubble, but no matter how he tried, brut force or subtle trickery, it refused to pop and vanish.

Finally, he stopped, and sighed. "You did your work too well, miko."

Kagome winced guiltily. "Trust me, I'm kicking myself about it too. I've done that more times than I can count in the past year." She looked at the faint violet of the ward, fading into its normal state of transparency. "I've wished a million times I could take it back, but…as well try to take back words once they've been said."

Sesshoumaru closed his eyes, tired. He turned away from the well, sitting not two paces from him. It might as well be on the other side of the world.

Actually, he'd have preferred the other side of the world. It would have been easier…

Souta looked at where the now vanished ward had been. He'd never really seen it before…usually, it was invisible to him. Today was the first time he'd seen it, when it reacted with the power of the sword.

Why was it such a problem? It looked so fragile…Souta walked down, and touched a finger to where he thought the ward would be. His hand moved forwards slowly. He reached further, grinning. He was sure he'd gone though at this point. The barrier wasn't stopping_ him_. He took a step forward, and jumped as a shock ran though him

Okay…so maybe he'd been wrong. Souta rubbed his hand and winced. That had hurt…. He ran back outside, trying to catch up with Kagome and Sesshoumaru on the way in. Sesshoumaru watched him.

_'Foolish boy, thinking he could get through like that. A barrier can keep out just youkai, or everything. This one keeps out everything, since Kagome can't get though. Despite having been the creator of this particular ward in the first place.'_

Sesshoumaru ignored Souta as he ran to catch up. He was more concerned with getting back to his room and resting briefly. It wouldn't take long for him to recover from his exertion, but some rest was needed. Kagome had certainly been right about the energy fighting with wards took.

'_She needs to learn control. She has a lot of power to be able to do what she can, but nothing is directed. She is a danger to herself, and others. I cannot believe my brother was more intent on his goals than on letting her have time to train. _

_Ah well. It's partly that that killed him, I suspect. If she had been in control of all her potential…I don't really know why he died; only that he did so while fighting Naraku. An honorable death, but a foolish one. Just like him. Foolish.'_

Perhaps if he used his brother's sword…it might work, except for the fact that he couldn't _use_ the sword. It was a constant thorn in his side. The most powerful sword nearly in his hands, and he couldn't use it. Only Inuyasha had been able to touch it, or a human. A human couldn't have used it, which left Inuyasha as the one person chosen to wield the sword. It grated.

Even after Inuyasha was dead, the barrier would probably prevent him from using the sword…

Sesshoumaru resolved to try to use Tetsusaiga as soon as he got back upstairs. It was worth a try.

Kagome opened the front door and walked into the kitchen, while Sesshoumaru turned towards the stairs. Souta came in behind him and went to sit with his grandpa.

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He set Toukijin down carefully in the closet, then stared at the sword wrapped in red. It had hurt when he'd learned father had barricaded it against the eldest son. He had been remembered…but only to ensure that he didn't take what had been given to Inuyasha.

Sour old bastard, his father...

He carefully drew the red haori back from the sheath, and looked at what lay beneath. It was a plain sword, battered and rusty.

But not in the hands of one who could use it fully.

He reached out, and touched the hilt, intending to draw the blade.

Sparks ran across the battered hilt, and burned his fingers. He drew back, having discovered the barrier still in place.

**Damn** father. He flipped the haori back into place, and curled up on the bed, wrapping himself in his tail to think. He had been able to use the sword by himself, **without** a human arm at one point…there was a way! That one time, the pain had been lessened enough that he could wield it…there had to be a way to make it disappear entirely…

Even so it had hurt like hell, and it had been all he could do to not cry out when he'd let go in a slow, measured way to conceal the true pain of that touch. He knew that if he were to use the sword as he was now, it would only be for seconds, or less. If at all. That might not be enough against the barrier.

There had to be a way to get home with the Tetsusaiga. If nothing else, at least he would be able to have the sword now. Inuyasha wasn't around to protect it. It was just lying on the floor.

When he went home, he'd try to take it with him. He would find out how to use it. The smith who'd made the sword had to have left a loophole for him to exploit.

Father had used the sword, so it wasn't a barrier to keep out anyone but a hanyou. It was a barrier specifically against him, or any other youkai not permitted to touch it (which was nearly _everyone_). There had to be a different way to make it work for him as well.

Sesshoumaru stared at the ceiling, and plotted the ways he could bend the sword to his will. There had to be some way of making it his own. He refused to believe that where there was a will, there would not be a way.

He winced. It didn't always work that way. Will alone wasn't everything. Power to back that will was important too…

But power alone was empty…He'd wanted Rin back well enough, but all his useless swinging of Tenseiga hadn't done a thing for her. The power of healing hadn't been strong enough. The sword must only work once, or only on the newly dead.

It hadn't worked for her.

His fault that he failed at bringing her back. All his arrogant fault for killing her in the first place…because she was close to him, she was a target…his fault.

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_Gomen, minna-san! This chapter was a day late, I know. I had my first day of university yesterday and it was loooong. Start early, go till late. Bah. I'm going to have to move the 'update day' to Thursday, where theres only one class. No way is Wednesday working..._

_Anywise, hope you enjoyed, even if it was a day off. lol. No worries, right? (grin)_


	11. ch10:Chess, Anyone?

_I had a question last chapter about the pairings... Yes, this is a 'romantic' story... eventually. My idea of fluff 'nd stuff is rather…subtle. There's a few things that will start to happen , but really, they only get together towards the last half of the story, and we're not there yet. I'm sorry if that isn't fast enough for anyone, so my apologies if you were hoping for something rather sooner. Lol. Enjoy the chapter._

**: Chess, Anyone:**

Kagome sat down at the table, while her mom battled with the stove. She watched steam rise towards the ceiling in lazy curls, then turned back to what was important.

"Did you talk to grandpa on the way here about money?" Her mom had said she was going to, since grandpa had so far refused to see the debt they were in. Perhaps recent financial events would bring home the situation.

"I did, but you know him. He waved it off again. He was sure that with the latest idea to increase income, we'd be fine." Mrs. Higurashi sighed. Her father had been an able businessman when he was younger…and he was convinced that he still was, despite all evidence to the contrary. He'd lost his edge, and the choices made lately hadn't been to their benefit at all.

Kagome thought back to the last time her grandpa had thought of a 'new business idea'. Selling good luck kappa hands at her old school…which hadn't worked at all. The students had been curious as to what the hands really were, **or** they had been horrified at seeing the withered green things. Either way, no one bought them.

He'd spent a small fortune on the stupid scaly hands, and had only sold one or two to the science teachers so they could examine them in class for a lab. Not to mention he'd scared some of the families attending the school away from the shrine. The kids hadn't wanted to go anywhere near somewhere that sold 'those icky green prune things.'

"Right. What brilliant idea has he come up with this time?" Hopefully, she could persuade grandpa **not** to try the latest plan out while they were in such a bad position. There was nothing to spare on some grand plot of his at the moment, and probably wouldn't be for a while.

"He didn't really say, but I think he wanted to expand the gift shop. It's true it's only a shack right now, but there's no way we could take a loan out of the bank to expand it. If they'd even lend us the money." Another not so good plan. Or rather, a good plan, but not one they could act on at the moment.

Kagome laughed. "A bigger gift shop for the tourists, eh? That's not a bad idea…but we couldn't do that now. You're right about that." So that's what he'd come up with. Couldn't he see why they wouldn't be able to afford that? He was getting worse than she'd thought. She'd see if she could talk him out of it…

Actually, the two little old ladies who'd stopped to watch 'Sir Fluffy' practicing had given her an idea. Why not bring in a martial arts group or something? They usually loved having a chance to show off their school's skills to people. It would be good for the Higurashi's, and good publicity for whatever school they got to come in.

"I'll try and talk him out of it later, but I have an idea, actually. Why don't we get a karate school in here or something? They could use the courtyard." That would be fun…providing she could keep Souta out from underfoot. He'd probably be just as bad with them as he'd been so far with Sesshoumaru.

"That's an idea that might work. At the least, it won't cost us anything to find out about." Mrs. Higurashi smiled tiredly "That's something in its favor right there." All that it would cost them would be a few phone calls. Pretty cheap, which was good from her point of view. She'd have to look into that next week…

Kagome got up and looked in on the living room "I'll talk to him later, since he looks busy. What do you need help with for dinner?"

"Oh…why don't you watch the steamed vegetables for me?"

No further mention of money was made, or reference to the paycheck Kagome would get at the end of the week.

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Souta pulled the chess box off the shelf, and dusted it off. He turned around and ran over to where his grandpa was sitting quietly on the couch, resting. Now seemed like the perfect time to get his grandpa to teach him how to play western style chess. He'd promised he'd do that first thing when he got back. Then maybe he could learn how to play shohgi, Japanese style chess.

"Hey! You said you'd teach me how to play this! Can you do that right now?" That had been something his grandpa had promised him a week ago, and he'd been waiting patiently since then to learn. That way, he could beat everyone in that upcoming online tournament…

His grandpa laughed good humouredly. "Oh, Souta. I'm not even unpacked yet. You're too impatient, young man." All these teens, rushing around and wanting everything done right this instant. When would they learn to take things slow?

Souta's face fell. "Oh…I'm sorry. You could teach me later then if you wanted." He'd completely forgotten his grandpa hadn't unpacked yet. Maybe he could wait just a bit. Do homework while he waited, or something.

"No no, I didn't mean I was too busy for my grandson! Come over here, and sit down." He moved off the couch, and Souta handed him the box with an eager smile. Now he'd be able to win the tournament! "Now, this is how you set up the pieces."

He showed Souta the confusing rules book, and demonstrated how to play. Souta watched, but soon gave up hope on winning. His grandpa was beating him hands down…it should be his **grandpa** who played everyone online, not him!

Click, scrape. The pieces moved. Soon, a fair amount of Souta's players were piled up near the board, killed off in the process of the game. Most of his grandpa's were still standing. And closing in on him…

He winced as another one of his rooks was swept easily off the board. "Oh…I'll never beat you." Why had he thought he'd be able to win? He'd known nothing at all…he wouldn't even _place_, at this rate.

"Souta, don't be silly. This is only the first time you've played! You're doing pretty good for your first game." That was just a _little_ white lie, but it wouldn't hurt anyone. Souta might get better if he was encouraged. Maybe. "Why don't you move over there?" That was a good place for his grandson to go to. He might not lose too badly that way. Souta just expected too much of himself, after winning all the time in those silly electronic games. Those were just shoot-em-ups, while this game required thought, and skills other than button pressing. No wonder he had such a terrible time of it, if he was used to just gunning enemies down easily.

Souta looked closely at the space he'd been shown dubiously. Wouldn't that leave his knight open? He shrugged, and moved there. Wouldn't hurt him, since he was already doing pretty badly. Most of the board was dominated by the black pieces his grandpa commanded.

"Tell you what. Why don't you go put my old record player on, with that 8 track over there. Music helps you think sometimes." Grandpa smiled helpfully, pointing out the old turntable. That was one of his favorite records. He'd bought it well over 40 years ago for the shrine. He'd thought he could play it outside on nice days, and have traditional music for the tourists. That, and he just happened to like this record.

Anything to distract him from the game! Souta got up and fiddled with the turntable, putting the needle on the record with exaggerated care. He hoped he wasn't being too obvious about procrastinating…in the end, he only gained a few seconds more away from the board.

The soothing melody of the koto, wrapped around the piping shinobue flute wafted out from the old turntable, and drifted through the house. Souta went back to the chess game, not convinced that the traditional music would help. He would rather have listened to the latest rap mp3's he'd downloaded.

Although…his grandpa probably would object to 50 Cent, now that he thought about it…

He sat back down on the floor, completely ignoring the record player. If he didn't, it was going to get on his nerves sooner or later. He didn't really like old music much.

The soaring tones rose from the spinning needle, completely unheeded by the young boy.

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Upstairs, Sesshoumaru blinked. He listened carefully.

Was that music? He laid off plotting to bend Tetsusaiga to his own ends to sit up and listen. Yes, it was music, though he couldn't imagine where the musicians had come from. He'd seen no instruments since arriving here, and he was fairly sure he'd have seen a koto if the Higurashi family owned one. It was a pretty big instrument.

The lilting sound was coming from downstairs. Sesshoumaru got up and followed the music down to the living room. He padded softly on the carpet, ears wide open.

The room was completely devoid of musicians. There was no one there but Souta and the old man. The sounds seemed to be coming from a box sitting on the table. Was this another one of those inventions like the computer, or the x-box?

No…this was better.

He wondered briefly if there wasn't simply a miniature troop of musicians inside the box, but disregarded the notion immediately. The more arcane arts weren't in use in this era, and a few small youkai would be unlikely inhabitants. For one thing, he couldn't see them being content to stay in the box…

He sat down cross-legged on the sofa's arm, and listened. The sound quality wasn't as good as if the musicians had been right in the room either, another point against his theory. As well, the sounds would have been different on smaller instruments. It couldn't be miniature musicians.

He had no idea how the music was playing, since it wasn't a live performance, but however the humans had managed to record the sounds, it had degraded the quality.

Also, the flute player needed to more softly…

But still…to be able to capture music like this was pretty amazing.

He sat quietly and listened, watching the board game on the floor progress with vague interest.

Finally, Souta threw up his hands and laughed. "Okay, you win grandpa! Can I turn on off the record now?" Traditional music was fine for two seconds, but it was nowhere near as interesting as the rap he'd gotten from America.

He got up to turn it off, but a soft voice stopped him "Let it stay." Why would the boy want to turn it off? The reason completely escaped him.

Souta nearly jumped in surprise. When had Sesshoumaru come into the room? He hadn't heard him at all, and he'd nearly given him a heart attack! He was just too damn quiet to hear…"You want to listen?" He shrugged. If Sesshoumaru wanted to listen, he'd go upstairs and play a few games. That way, he wouldn't be bored to tears.

Souta left in search of more interesting pursuits.

Grandpa looked at Sesshoumaru warily. He hadn't noticed the **pest** come into the room either. Which meant that if the pest decided to murder him in his bed one night, he wouldn't be able to hear him at all… But…he liked the music. Maybe he wasn't **completely **bad after all…maybe.

Plus, Kagome had warned him to be nice. He might as well attempt being civil to their 'guest'.

For now.

Sesshoumaru avidly watched the needle as it ran and bounced along the disk. It seemed to be running along a track, always moving in towards the center of the spinning black disk on top. "How does this work?" This was amazing, being able to play something anytime one liked. Or at least, he assumed anytime. Maybe he was wrong…but it was_ still_ amazing. Who knew humans could do this?

…maybe they were good for something after all…

"That? It's a record. Someone plays music, they record it, and it gets put on a record so anyone can play it whenever they want. I like these fine, but if you talk to my grandson he'll tell you all about CD's." He acted like he'd never seen a record before! Was the pest stupid as well as dangerous? Oh…wait…he **hadn't **seen a record before, had he? Oops…

"I see." He didn't really see, but that was fine. It didn't require understanding to listen. And they could play this over anytime then? He'd have to play this again soon. He sat back and let the music flow till it stopped of its own accord.

Why had the music stopped? Was something wrong?

"There…this sides done. Want to listen to the other side? It's got my favorite on it." Grampa got up and went to turn over the vinyl record. He wouldn't have bothered, except that the better songs were on the still un-played side of the disk. He came back, and gave the album cover to Sesshoumaru.

He could pretend to be nice while Kagome was next door in the kitchen, watching. He would be better off if she was not annoyed further today…"See? That's what song's playing now." He pointed out the song, and the information listed below it about who was playing. "It's pretty old…you might even have heard it before."

He **had** heard it before, in fact. When the song was new. One of the musicians at the lord of the South's court had created it for a banquet. The crane youkai had been a very good musician. He remembered hearing it at that feast, played by its creator. It had been changed only a little by the years.

"I have heard it." He looked down at the record cover, careful not to scratch the shiny surface with his claws. All the songs had names. He looked at what information was listed for the song, and had to laugh quietly. They had named Akira's song wrong, in addition to playing it differently. The self important musician would have been positively **green **with anger…

Grandpa looked at the youkai strangely. What was he laughing so quietly about? He'd forgiven him temporarily because he seemed to enjoy his favorite record, but what was he thinking about? Was he plotting to kill him in his sleep? "What's so funny?" He **had** to find out if there was a plot on his life!

"What Akira would look like if he'd heard what they'd done to his song." Sesshoumaru carefully managed not to smile. He'd admired the talent the other youkai had, but he'd never cared for his raw, grating arrogance. He'd disliked the other youkai rather intensely, in fact.

The song actually sounded better now too, which would have enraged Akira further, much to Sesshoumaru's amusement. He'd never cared for the pompous musician at all. He'd been dead for years….almost 60 years. Or well over 500, rather. Quite a while.

It was still highly amusing to think of his face when he heard how they'd 'mutilated' his song. Or at least, what he'd have thought of as mutilating. It really was better this way. More polished.

"You…you knew who wrote it?" Grandpa's eyes widened. That…wow. That was slightly odd. The song was old…over 500 years old. How old was Sesshoumaru? This was creepy…he'd almost have **preferred** the suspected plot…

"A wonderful musician. A complete idiot otherwise."

Grandpa's eyes bulged. He was just tossing all that off like it was nothing…they were talking about centuries here! What was he, some immortal youkai? This was too weird for him…Grandpa left the room and went to unpack, unnerved by the quietly amused gold eyes in the living room.

He was going to put a ward…or two…or ten…around his bedroom as soon as he got settled in.

Sesshoumaru hardly noticed the old man leave. He wasn't really interested in him. He was far more interested in the next song coming on. He read the information on the record, and sat back for an enjoyable afternoon, content that, in this at least, the past remained the same.

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Grandpa fiddled with the hakama in his suitcase idly, still a little freaked by the youkai downstairs. He'd temporarily sort of forgiven the 'pest' when he liked the same music he did, but he wasn't so sure now.

What had Kagome brought home? Sesshoumaru was a complete unknown to him. He wasn't like his brother at all. He'd even had the nerve to attack him!

…he might even try to do it again…

But then, he did something completely out of keeping with the image he gave off, and sat down to listen to an old record. What's more, he'd known the composer of one of the songs. Which was quite scary. They'd thought Kagome had gone back around 450 years, but the song had been supposed to be around 590 years old. Where they wrong in their guesses?

Come to think of it, Kagome had said something about Oda Nobunaga once, and wasn't that around the 1570's? Maybe they had been wrong in their time line. But that just meant it was more like 420ish years she'd traveled…making the song dated 170ish years earlier.

Which would make Sesshoumaru even _older_…

Was Sesshoumaru really over a hundred and seventy? Did youkai live that long, or longer? Even though he was a shrine keeper, he didn't know much. His granddaughter knew a lot more than he did. He sighed, and started putting away clothes. This was too much for one old man's head to wrap around. All these young people these days, going time hopping, and telling him to let youkai stay in a shrine…

What was the world coming to?

Maybe he should try getting rid of the youkai again, before he was the one gotten rid of. No matter what he'd been told, he was quite convinced his scrolls had the power to banish this pest from his home. And that the youkai did, in fact, need banishing no matter what anyone said. Even if his scrolls couldn't get through the barrier his granddaughter had made (He'd almost set the mini shrine on fire once, trying to put the scrolls on the well and having it burn) he was **sure** they had some sort of power.

Otherwise, why would Sesshoumaru hate having them pasted to himself? He couldn't stand the purifying power, that's why!

Sesshoumaru was probably afraid of what would happen if he tried to banish him again…. That was it! He would completely cover the room the youkai slept in, in scrolls!

Humming to himself, Grandpa sat down after unpacking, and pulled out his scroll making supplies. He would put scrolls everywhere in Kagome's room! All over the underside of the bed, the door, the window, the ceiling…. Everywhere! And he would get Sesshoumaru out of there for good!

He finished the protection scrolls for his own room first, and put them up all over the walls. He had to be sneaky…Sesshoumaru-the-pest could come in thought the window, or the walls, or the ceiling…but he would outthink him! He'd be smarter! He'd put protections **everywhere! **He'd get there first, and then he'd be totally secure.

**Then** he'd put banishing charms all over Kagome's room once he was safe in here!

_That_ would show him!

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Sesshoumaru put the record case down, and examined the turntable. The music had finally stopped again, and he wondered how the old man had gotten it to keep playing. He'd just flipped the record over, right? If the old man could do it, so could Sesshoumaru.

He picked the vinyl disk up, careful not to scratch it, and put it down again on the other side. He waited expectantly. There was no sound coming out of it. So what had he done wrong? Why wasn't it working?

He looked carefully, then thought of the needle. Wasn't it supposed to be on the record first? He picked it up, and put it on the record's edge gently. He didn't want to damage something so precious. Not only would the family be furious, but he would have killed the music.

Immediately, sound started to come out again, the same song he'd first heard. Sesshoumaru allowed himself a swift smirk of triumph, then went back to sitting on his perch on the sofa arm to listen.

This was quite fine. Music, and a comfy seat to listen in. He sat back again, certain that he'd just discovered the most important thing invented in the modern world. Or at least, most important from his point of view. The shower ran a close second, as did the computer. Guns were probably the worst thing. Or maybe missiles and nukes were worst…

He watched as Souta came down the stairs a little in a foul mood, muttering about the 'stupid people online' who kept beating him. Nothing to do with him, so he ignored the boy.

Souta was still fuming after his defeat in the chess games. There was no way he could be that bad, was there? All those people who **said** they were beginners were just liars saying that to beat him! They must really be master chess players, hiding behind the label 'novice', just waiting to beat him soundly!

That was the problem online…people lied all the time…just so they could beat him at chess!

He perked up as he saw Sesshoumaru balanced on the sofa. He could teach him chess too! That way, he could have another **real** beginner to play against. Chess was western, so there was no way the youkai would know how to play. It didn't hurt that he wasn't a gaming person either...

Which meant he would probably win. Souta didn't mind that at all. His ego needed all the help it could get.

"Hey, want to play chess?" He asked. He'd probably win easily if he played Sesshoumaru.

"Chess?" What was that? What was so important about this 'chess' that the boy had had to interrupt the music?

"It's this board game. It's kinda cool. Like shougi, if you've ever played that." There was a site with a Lord of the Rings themed chess set, or a Halo one. There was even Harry Potter, if you liked that stuff. He'd liked the others better, since they had better graphics.

Interesting. So far, all the games Souta had tried to interest him in were a series of explosions and unrealistic battles on a screen. Not only boring, but useless. This was a little different. It was played on a board, for starters. And he had been known to enjoy playing the odd game of shohgi. "What does one do?" He might as well find out about this chess Souta spoke of.

With the way the boy babbled on, he'd know sooner or later, like it or not…

"The black pieces try to take over, and the white pieces try to take over. It's a strategy type thing." Come to think of it, he'd never been a strategy games person. Something like Age of Empires, or Age of Wonders was okay for a while, but he'd rather play in first person than command armies any day.

Strategy? This sounded like two generals, fighting on a squared off piece of board. Very like shoji. This might be more interesting than he'd thought. He understood the strategies and tactics of war quite well. Far better than any human general, since the troops he'd commanded were so varied in ability. A youkai lord and his generals had to take all that into account, while a human never had to unless fighting youkai. Being used to calculating so many abilities kept your skills polished in a way commanding humans never could. Usually, said humans never learned think of everything like that. They never considered the ground opening beneath them, or a rain of fire. It was unnecessary, until too late.

Ah well. Easier to beat them that way.

Sesshoumaru slid off the couch and sat down to watch, mildly interested, enough to see what was going on.

'The music must have mellowed him out a little' Souta thought, smiling. Usually Sesshoumaru wasn't this interested in anything to do with games. Weird. But then again, didn't music soothe the savage beast or something? Sesshoumaru hardly qualified as a savage beast, but…bleh. This was getting far too philosophical for him.

Souta set up the board, explaining everything as he went just the way his grandfather had done not so long ago. Then, he moved his first pawn, and waited for Sesshoumaru to move.

It didn't take long for the youkai to match him pawn for pawn. Souta shrugged, and moved again.

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Half an hour later, he was looking at the board in disbelief. How had Sesshoumaru beaten him? He was supposed to beat **Sesshoumaru**! He knew less about the rules than Souta himself did…but it had taken him only a few well thought out moves to beat him hands down. "I thought you'd never played chess before!"

"I haven't." When would he have learned how to? He'd never heard of this particular game of strategy before today. Of all the games Souta had shown him, though, this was by far the most interesting. And the one that made the most sense. Who wanted to waste hours staring at explosions in the dream-world of Halo? You couldn't do anything with the skills you learned there.

This, however, was quite like shohgi, in its concept. It would be the closest he would get to commanding troops in this time, anyway. He could practice with the sword by himself to keep up his skills just as he always had, but if he was going to go against Damia, or the troops that were loyal to their general over him, it would be a good idea to keep in practice. This was the closest he would get.

He wondered what the computer could tell him about chess. Maybe there would be more rules online, or strategies. The rule book he'd shown was only a fingers width thick. It was written in odd lettering too, all the characters the same, lined up beautifully. The person who had copied it out, or even engraved it, must have been very neat.

Actually, it looked like the words written on the computer. He still didn't know how that worked out…

"Well then how did you beat me so easily!" Souta sulked, leaning up against the couch. He got up in annoyance, and flicked the turntable off. "How did you do it!" This was humiliating. He'd been beaten to a pulp online, and now Sesshoumaru, who hadn't even known chess existed before today, had beaten him into the **pulp **of a pulp. If that even made sense. Regardless, it sucked.

"This is nothing more than directing troops. Simplified, and with odd rules, but the principle remains." What was so difficult about that? The boy must not know the meaning of 'graceful in defeat,' judging by the pout he wore, and the petty action of turning off the music. This was only a game. If he'd lost a battle for real, he'd have had a lot more to worry about than losing. Like survival. That had happened to him a few times, though he'd never suffered a loss great enough to set him back too much. The behavior the boy was showing was shameful.

Oh. So it was just like commanding an army then? How nice for Souta to know that. Next time he tried to play chess, he was going to go out and command an army to practice with. Right. Good for Sesshoumaru, bad for him. Assuming Sesshoumaru had led troops at one point. Interesting idea. He'd have to ask him about it later. "When would I have done that? Arg …" Souta went back upstairs to finish sulking in his room. He didn't want to play chess anymore.

Stupid Sesshoumaru. Stupid chess game. Stupid tournament.

Sesshoumaru looked at the board, and shrugged. The human really had no more concept of directing pieces that attacked with different abilities (say, by moving in an down-sideways shape for a knight, or on just a diagonal for a bishop) than some of the human generals, even youkai commanders he'd defeated over the years.

What was so hard about knowing your warriors' abilities and how to use them? It wasn't too difficult for him to keep all that in mind while playing. Granted, he was more than a little older than Souta, but even when he'd been of comparable age he'd known that. Certainly he'd never been so sulky in defeat. He'd never have been allowed to when young, and now his pride and self discipline would not allow it.

Ah well. Sesshoumaru decided he'd go back to his own room and get back to trying to think of a way around the Tetsusaiga's barrier. That was what he'd been doing before he'd heard the record and come down to investigate. Maybe the interruption would have given him new insight…though he doubted that. If years of trying hadn't managed to get him through, then he doubted the chance to relax would

Humph. He'd keep trying. There had to be a way. It would work.

He would **make** it work…

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Kagome glanced into the empty living room, and sighed. Chess pieces were scattered everywhere, and the record player was still plugged in. Souta really needed to learn how to clean up after himself. She glanced at the chessboard.

Only the white king remained standing, facing an army of black knights. The black queen stood opposite the white king, locking the game into checkmate. It looked like white had been badly beaten, and had been forced to cede the victory to the black king on bended, plastic knee. All his allies had been defeated, and the black generals were left to dominate the left side of the board.

She laughed. Looked like Souta hadn't learned all that much from her grandpa after all, if grandpa had won this easily against him.

He'd wanted to learn to play chess for ages, and grandpa had promised him he'd teach Souta just before leaving. It looked like he really had a lot to learn.

Including cleaning up his own mess.

Kagome bent down and swept all the pieces back into the box, and put it back on the shelf. Then, she put the record away. She could blame grandpa for that, she supposed. Souta wasn't likely to haul out the records of his own accord. He would probably turn up his nose and go download something more 'interesting,'

She rather liked this particular record. It reminded her of home, and of the late night celebrations in the village. The music had been rough and unskilled, but it was made in good spirit by the musicians.

She had other memories of this particular record too, not only from the feudal era. Grandpa had played it when she was little, for the tourists. Added to the 'atmosphere,' he'd said. She slipped the black vinyl into its album, and put it on the shelf in its accustomed spot.

She'd have to ask Souta how the chess game had gone at dinner. Even if he'd lost, he'd been so enthusiastic…and there was always the remote possibility grandpa had let him win. Maybe. She didn't think he'd have done that, though.

Once the living room looked slightly more normal (Except for her messy futon in the corner) she started to go upstairs. She looked in on Souta first. "Dinner!"

Souta perked up immediately "Food!" He ran past her without a second thought.

Kagome had to laugh a little. Obvious what _his_ priorities were. She moved on to her own room, and stared at Sesshoumaru's back. He was looking out the window at the Goshinboku. "Dinner. Didn't you hear?"

He ignored her, so she shrugged and moved down the hall. If he wanted to starve, let him. She wouldn't stop him. She frowned as she came to grandpa's room.

He was busily trying to hide what he'd been doing, but she could see scrolls pasted all over his room and on the door frame. What on earth was going on? Was he trying to barricade himself in or something? She shrugged. If he wanted to do that, it wasn't hurting anyone. Except the trees, for the paper.

If he tried sticking paper scrolls on Sesshoumaru again though, that was different. She'd have to tell him not to do that again sometime. Who knew? He _might_ even listen to her. He thought she was the 'mighty miko,' slayer of demons.

It was odd, having him listen to her like an adult. Very…different.

"Come on grampa, you can do that later. And no using those on Sesshoumaru either! Dinner!"

Grampa shoved all the scrolls he'd been just about to decorate Kagome's stolen room with under the bed with his toe. He had been going to put them up in a minute, but Sesshoumaru was in there. So he hadn't been able to…yet.

"I know. I'll be right there." This was perfect! He'd wait till everyone was at the table, then run around and put all his work up quickly! He watched as Kagome turned down the hall, and tried to be covert in watching as Sesshoumaru followed her downstairs.

Now was his chance! He raced into the room, and feverishly pasted scrolls on the walls and furniture. He bent down on his knees and put them on the bottom of the mattress, and slipped some in the covers. Then, he dragged a chair over and put the remainder of the exorcisms and banishments on the door frame, ignoring the inquiring cheep from Shiro. He rubbed his hands together, pleased with himself. That would teach Sesshoumaru! He'd be gone for good!

He put one last scroll, written on the back of a Wackdonalds coupon, on the door and then went down to dinner.

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"Did you tell father to come? He's taking forever." They'd been waiting for five minutes already for him…what could possibly have taken this much time?

"Yeah…he **is** taking his sweet time, isn't he?" Kagome wondered what he was up to. He wasn't doing something with all those scrolls in his room, was he? She hoped not…she thought he'd looked a little too innocent back there. It was easy to see where Souta got the 'fake innocence' look from.

She looked at the door, and smiled as he came into view. "Never mind. He's here now." She was going to ask him a few questions about that room of his later…what had he been doing that required him to wallpaper everything in scrolls? He was up to something…probably not a good something…

Grampa sat down across from Sesshoumaru, and gave him a poorly concealed glare. Kagome sighed.

Great…

Dinner was a lot quieter than last night. Souta sat and fidgeted, occasionally looking like he wanted to burst out with more questions. Her mom was tired from work and driving to go get grandpa. Grandpa was glaring at Sesshoumaru openly by now. Sesshoumaru was just ignoring him along with everyone else. She herself was tired from working on cleaning exhibits. (What idiot made dinosaur bones so tall you had to go and get a ladder to clean them? And then, she'd fallen **off** the damn ladder…)

All in all, Kagome was very glad when dinner was over and she could escape to the living room. Souta joined her there a few minutes later.

"It's scary in there…Why doesn't grampa like Sesshoumaru? They both like music, and they could play chess or something…" Souta wondered aloud.

Kagome looked at him oddly "Sesshoumaru likes music?" Now that was something she would never, ever have expected. Sesshoumaru, the cold blooded killer, liked music. Very…interesting…

Although…he knew how to sing, didn't he? She still didn't get that.

Kagome remembered what had happened while he had eaten too much chocolate. He'd sung very well then, even if he was probably hallucinating. Kinda like Ozzy. Loaded out of his mind, and singing just fine, thank you very much. She laughed at that. Sesshoumaru, meet Ozzy Osborne…Ozzy Osborne, meet Sesshoumaru…dear gods…

She'd have sworn he'd had perfect pitch or something. It had been hard to tell, since he'd been so quiet then. He must have had training, to be that good. She'd been in the school choir for a while, so she knew how hard it was to do that. She couldn't sing _that_ well.

He didn't play chess either, did he? That must be something new to him too. Or maybe he did. Hurray for him. She had no idea how he could know how, though…

"Grandpa put the record on earlier, and I was going to turn it off, but he wanted it left on. So I left it and went to see if I could do better in online chess than against grandpa."

Kagome laughed. "I saw the board…the white king versus most of the black army."

Souta laughed a little. "I didn't lose **that** badly to grandpa. That was when I came back downstairs and offered to teach Sesshoumaru chess."

"That was nice of you." Souta must have beaten poor Sesshoumaru very badly then.

Souta made a funny noise. "Not really. I got **creamed** by him."

Now that was interesting. Either Souta was a very bad chess player (Which was quite likely) or Sesshoumaru was a brilliant player. Or a combination thereof. Kagome laughed. "I didn't think he'd know about chess."

"He didn't. I asked him after we finished, and he said it was easy if you had ever commanded an army." Souta scowled. That still irritated him. He knew all about chess, and Sesshoumaru didn't, but he'd _still_ been pulped.

Ah. That explained it. Sesshoumaru probably **had** commanded armies at some point, and so that was why he'd been quick to pick it up…hadn't that been where chess came from? The kings over in Europe thought it up to mimic directing an army, way back when? She didn't know.

It still didn't explain anything about singing, or why he liked the record that had been on. She'd have to show him her CD collection and her stereo. He might like that. Or she could get Souta to show him where to find things like mp3's on the Internet.

That, and she was going to ask him about singing…

Kagome decided she'd do that now, while she thought of it. Otherwise she'd probably end up forgetting again. She got up and headed for the stairs.

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Sesshoumaru escaped from the dinner table as soon as he could as well, and headed back to his room. It was still an odd experience to share a meal with this human family, and he hadn't cared for the way the old man had been glaring at him. He was used to private, silent meals unpunctuated by glares or death threats. Or at least, openly made ones. It was just a little rude, in his opinion, to threaten someone while they were eating dinner. He couldn't do anything about living here, and would far rather be gone. So why was he getting such hateful glares? Interesting…

He opened the door, and frowned. Something was wrong…the old man had been in here. He could smell it. He absently sat down on the bed. Something crinkled beneath him, and he pulled back the covers to reveal a heap of scribbled on paper.

Were these supposed to be scrolls…? He raised an eyebrow in amusement.

He looked up as Kagome poked her head in. "Hi! Souta said you liked music, so I thought…. What are those?" She pointed at the paper on the bad, suspicions roused.

"I think they're supposed to be scrolls…" He could smell the old man all over this, but even if his nose hadn't been working it was obvious who'd been putting paper in his bed. It was somewhat darkly entertaining, actually.

Kagome rolled her eyes and sighed. "Grampa…we're going to have a little chat later…." She sighed. "I bet there's more."

Sesshoumaru looked at the window and at the door. There were quite a few more. Interesting. Why would someone go to all this trouble when it was clear the paper had no mystical power? He shrugged. "They do nothing."

"But what if they did? He could have done a lot of damage…arg…" Sesshoumaru didn't look like he cared, so she let it go. For now.

"Anyway, I came up here to say you could look at my CD collection. Souta said you liked music, and I've got a lot of CD's. I have no idea what you'll think of rock, or pop, jazz, or metal…but you can listen to them."

CD's? Wasn't that what the old man had been talking about earlier? More music…and what did metal have to do with music? Maybe 'metal' music consisted of musicians striking swords or armor to make them chime…

He watched, slightly nervous as Kagome pulled a plastic case with a (he shuddered) grey statue on it off the shelf, and carefully took out a small silver disk. "Come over here so you can see what going on. This is a CD. It'd kinda like a record, only you don't have two sides, and the music is better quality."

She put it in a black box. "This is a stereo. Just put in the disk, and press this button here. The arrow stands for play, which will play the CD." Sesshoumaru watched carefully as Kagome pressed the button. The stereo whirred, then started to play something completely foreign to him.

The song was quiet, and dipped up and down with clear notes…before exploding into a beautifully soaring voice, and heavy sounding instruments. He had never heard its like. This…it was something different, something new. Something entirely different from anything he'd ever heard. And it was beautiful…but…he couldn't make out what was being sung. It sounded like another language.

"What is she singing?" She had a very good voice, for a human. He wondered what instruments were being used. They sounded so different from what he knew, but not in a bad way. Even the style of voice was different.

"Oh…oops. I know some English, and I like music sung in that language. But you wouldn't have heard it before. It's English…I think this song is called Nemo, and the album is 'Once', by Nightwish."

Sesshoumaru nodded slightly. He'd never heard of Nemo, Nightwish, or Once. English, was it? Was a lot of English used in this time? He asked.

"Sorta…we learn it in school…but they do use it a lot internationally, I suppose. I just think it's a little funny that a Finnish band is singing in English, and a Japanese person is listening to it." Kagome laughed. Sesshoumaru didn't comment. The names meant nothing to him.

But it did sound like English was pretty widely used. Maybe he should look that up on the computer, along with chess tomorrow…being very, very careful to avoid anything marked 'XXX'. XXX was bad. Very bad. He never wanted to see it again… well, maybe, but not while he was in this house…

He listened as the song wound down to a close, and then as the next came on. It had the same instruments in it, and another few besides. Whatever it was, it was interesting, catchy. It was completely different from anything he'd ever heard…he decided he liked it. The drums went deep inside him, resonating. Loud, and all at once. It was a wonderful, beautiful novelty. So _different_…whatever advances in weapons had been made, the ones in music almost made up for it…

Almost.

Kagome sighed. "Anyways, you can listen to all these….just don't scratch them, okay? They won't work then."

He nodded, and looked at the shelf of CD's. He could tell he'd be listening all night. He was a little miffed he'd been so open in his delight before, having been taught to suppress emotion, but if it gave him all this, it was quite fine.

"Oh…one more thing before I hit the sack. The volume's here…" Kagome yawned, and turned the volume up and down rapidly to demonstrate. Sesshoumaru privately winced a little as she turned it up loud, then back down to a reasonable level. Only a person near _deaf_ could listen to that volume comfortably!

Kagome yawned again, mumbled a goodnight, and then wandered off in the direction of her futon.

Sesshoumaru closed the door behind her, watching as he caught sight of the old man's disappointed face down the hall. He put the harmless old fool out of mind, and pulled out the CD's on the shelf. Some were in writing he could read, while others must be in this 'English'…

He'd forgotten to ask about the new instruments. Oh well. He'd find out tomorrow. Sesshoumaru turned down the volume so that only one with his hearing could listen, and settled in for the night.

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Kagome sighed as she slipped under the covers, then realized something. She'd forgotten to ask about why he liked music! Noooooo!

Crap. She'd have to wait till tomorrow to find out. She was too lazy to get out of her futon at this point.

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Grampa sat in his room, and plotted. Someday, somehow, he was going to get Sesshoumaru! He wouldn't be able to ignore grampa from now on as easily as he had those carefully made scrolls in Sesshoumaru's room…

Stupid Sesshoumaru-the-pest….

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_I happen to like Nightwish, so I used their latest CD for stuff. And Ozzy meeting Sesshoumaru just seemed amusing, because the bulk of this was written late at night, and such things often seem amusing then._

_If you think about it, it does make sense. As a lord's son, Sesshoumaru would have gotten a well rounded education, including lessons on music from his mother. Yay. My tweaking of various youkai minds is thus justified. Lol. _

_Man, I'm off to have a nap and then finish working on a new layout…stupid insane timetable…(yawns)…grr…dancing marshmallows, mn…(falls asleep on the keyboard and hits her head) Ouch! Damnit…oh, well, reviews might make me feel better (grins) seeing as this is chapter 10, I was hopeing to break into the double digits for reviews. If that isn't being too self serving. lol. Regardless, comments are apreciated! (big grin)_


	12. ch11:Illusionary Issues

**: Illusionary Issues :**

Grandpa sat and glared at the door to Kagome's room. The pest had been in there all day, only emerging once for a bagel, and once for a towel. He was just sitting in there, playing Kagome's weird music and plotting who knew what. It was most irritating.

There had to be some way to get rid of him before Kagome came home. Souta was at a friend's, so he didn't have any help from him. Although…Souta might be interested in scrolls, but he didn't think that extended to putting them on the 'pest'. His grandson liked Sesshoumaru for some reason.

Wait! He could shred a few scrolls, and put them in Sesshoumaru's food! Oh…wait…that wouldn't work. If grampa shredded the scrolls, they were useless…unless…

Wasn't there some way to write things on rice? Kagome had a necklace with a rice grain in a jar, didn't she? He could write scrolls like that!

Surely that would work…he would put mini rice scrolls in Sesshoumaru-the-pest's food!

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Sesshoumaru was almost done polishing his armor…last time he'd started, but stopped before he was done, because of the chocolate.

So, he'd turned on Kagome's music, and had spent most of his day polishing. He started humming along under his breath to the song which was playing, wishing he knew what was being sung. Maybe Kagome knew enough of this 'English' to translate.

Speaking of Kagome…he heard the door downstairs, and only had to wait a few minutes before Kagome opened the door, and poked in her head. She had a whole bunch of plastic rosaries with her.

"Hi! I found these, so we can try to put an illusion on them."

He put the armor away, and remained seated on the bed, slightly apprehensive. Kagome had mentioned this earlier. She put all but one of the necklaces on the bed, and went to turn off the music. She paused as the song switched, and laughed.

"Oh! I love this song!" She snapped her fingers, and started singing along in Japanese. "Jingle bells!" She grinned. She hadn't heard that since last December!

Kagome paused in her singing, since Sesshoumaru still looked slightly puzzled over the lyrics. Gradually, comprehension dawned. "Oh…right…I'll bet you never heard of Christmas."

No, he hadn't. What did it have to do with sleighs and bells? "What is this Christmas you speak of?"

Kagome paused. Right. _She_ thought Christmas was common and commercialized to death, but he wouldn't get it at all. "Um…a holiday…Santa Claus flies though the air on his sleigh, and puts things under your Christmas tree on Christmas eve. American holiday, I think. Or British. I don't really know where it started." If she remembered correctly, it started off as some religious holiday in Christianity, but somewhere along the line got turned into an annual shopping spree…

Sesshoumaru raised an eyebrow. Right. This Santa Claus sounded like a youkai to him. Or a quaint story that wasn't real. He also sounded like he broke into houses…

He shook his head, and decided to find out about Christmas…later.

"That reminds me…I never did ask you about where you learned to sing, did I?" Now _there_ was a mystery she would dearly love to solve, along with a few other things. Sesshoumaru was awfully tightfisted with information, and she was somewhat –more than somewhat- curious about him.

Why did he treat Inuyasha the way he did, or let Rin follow him around, even though he claimed to hate humans? Why did he know how to sing like a….like some professional? What was with Tetsusaiga? Who was he looking for? Damia? Why, though? What was going on?

Sing? He'd never told her that. As far as he knew, all he'd done was mention he liked the record. It was true he'd been trained, of course, but that wasn't something he'd ever brought up. Too many painful memories were there, days of failure, of being left alone, sent to wait in the …closet…

"When did I…?" He had never said that. Either she read minds, or he was starting to forget details. Neither of which was a good thing.

"Oh…well…When you ate that chocolate, you were….not yourself. I think you were dreaming or something…sometimes it makes dogs hallucinate." It was somewhat amusing now, though it had been anything but at the time. Especially when he had been muttering about Rin pulling his tail…it just sounded too _cute_. He really _had_ adored the little girl if he'd let her do that and get away with it…

He didn't really remember much of what had happened when he'd poisoned himself by accident. He only remembered the events leading up to then, and what had happened after he'd woken up. Between was a mix of dark images, and old memories. None were really clear. For all he knew, he could have said something.

"Anyway, you started singing. It was really good, you know. I was sure you'd have had training to be that good."

So, he'd been singing, had he? He closed his eyes briefly, stung at yet more evidence of his loss of control. He had always looked upon the tendency of humans to get sick more often as weak…and for him to not even _remember_ this…

He must have been completely out of his mind. Now that he thought of it, he was pretty sure one of the memories in that swirl of confused chocolate was of the burgundy room where he had first learned of music.

He hadn't done any singing since…since Rin couldn't go to sleep, a week before she'd died. He hadn't played the flute for many years before that, even. Not that he would be able to now, with only one arm. He'd rarely sung for Rin, but it had happened on occasion.

But she had made him learn, and he'd loved the music, despite her. Mother and her damn flute. Always the flute, and only the flute. Never, ever him. Never…

Kagome was right. He had been trained. His mother had seen to that. She couldn't bear to see a son of hers not share her own love of music…and she'd accomplished what she wanted, in the end. He did like music. But he'd never been good enough for her. Everything he did, she disapproved of. It made him wonder why she'd bothered…why teach him if he truly was that incompetent? But she'd kept teaching him, and had given him the basics of playing and singing.

"Well? Did you learn how to sing from someone?"

Why did she care? He wasn't about to share his life story with her, thank you very much. He'd learned, since not only was a warrior supposed to be able to fight, he was also supposed to be accomplished, knowledgeable and intelligent.

Mother had given him the best, though he was sure it was duty, nothing more. And that meant sitting with him all those hours, determined to make him learn her flute. No wonder she'd been so impatient. He'd taken so much time from her already. He felt angry, cheated. Her time…wasn't a mother supposed to love her son?

Had she?

"Yes. A lord's son is expected to have an education. Now, you said you were ready to try creating an illusion?" That ought to change the topic nicely. He wondered what Kagome would do. He was determined to put the whirl of memories her questions had raised behind him, where they belonged.

Kagome blinked, and looked at the bead heap. She had come up here to do that, hadn't she? She wondered who had trained him. He didn't look like he wanted to talk about it, at any rate. "Yeah. I've never done anything like this though, so you'll have to be patient with me. I'm guessing a lot."

She picked up the first necklace, and squinted furiously at it. Time to test her theories…

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Kagome frowned, tongue just visible out of the corner of her mouth. Why was the stupid necklace not cooperating with her? Maybe if she used a stone bead necklace instead of a plastic one it would help. There hadn't been plastic in the feudal ages, after all. Who knew? It might make a difference, at least enough so that she could succeed…

She was almost ready to try anything at this point. Kagome sighed, and tossed the third string of plastic beads at the wall, a little harder than intended. "This isn't really working…I'm going to try another one."

Sesshoumaru said nothing. He just watched as Kagome went to get yet another necklace to practice on. So far, she'd gone through three necklaces. The first one had melted. The second had started to hiss and melt, before she dropped it quickly from singed fingers. The third had simply met its fate against the wall.

Sesshoumaru sighed slightly, bored. This was humiliating, sitting and watching as she fumbled her way around. The whole idea of looking anything other than himself did not sit well with him. Why should he lower himself like this? He was Sesshoumaru…and they were mere humans.

…Humans with a decided advantage over him.

He knew what would happen, even without Kagome's saying so, if he was to go about as he always had. Humans were funny creatures…they feared anything not familiar, or more powerful.

He was something new here, and could be considered dangerous. They would fear him, and retaliate…and then where would he be? This was idiocy…it was all idiocy…

He definitely was not looking forwards to having one of those necklaces put on him. He was _pretty_ sure Kagome wouldn't kill him by accident, but with her power, who knew? That barrier in the well was evidence enough for him. She could injure him fairly badly, perhaps even kill him. He knew she had the power to do that, if it was ever stirred. If she'd taken time to become even half trained Naraku would probably have died a whole lot sooner. Stupid of his brother not to recognize that.

Not that that she could kill him so easily. He was far from helpless. She would need a **lot** of luck to be able to strike at him in that manner on her own without knowledge.

Unless, like now, he was letting her take a free shot at him. She would need to catch him napping, otherwise. And ever since he'd ended up spending a few hundred years paying for his last miscalculation, he was even less likely to let it happen again. No. He was not going to make that mistake again if he could help it. Mesau would pay most dearly…

Of course…all this speculation hadn't gotten him out of being the test subject for her project. He really hoped she either got it right, or gave up. He did_ not_ feel like having a bunch of beads melt around his neck. He didn't fight when he didn't have to, and he didn't endure pain when not warranted. Having a plastic string of beads melt into his skin was in that last category.

She really needed training. She was dangerous the way she was. A 'loose cannon', to quote what Souta had said once. He'd been rather taken with the notion of a chaotically turning cannon, ready to fire on whoever fell in front of it.

Almost like roulette, Russian style. (whatever Russian was…) Amazing what sorts of games these humans thought up to play. Spin a loaded gun, and woe betide the one it fired upon. If it fired. Chance. Chaos…just like humans themselves. They were always so unpredictable. That was the one thing that you could count on with any reliability when it came to humanity. Fitting that they should be the inventors of such idiocy, and the ones playing with the loaded pistol of roulette. For some reason, it seemed to sum up the entire notion of 'human' for him.

He watched as Kagome came back, holding up a polished quartz necklace in triumph. "Ha! Found one! Maybe this time it won't melt…I_ still_ don't know why it did that…" Kagome squinted at the drippy necklace on the floor. It had managed to flatten into a puddle of plastic in places. She would probably have a burn mark on her carpet too…

Why did it melt when she had tried to tie an illusion to it? She really had no idea if that was right, trying to place an image around the necklace the way she had tried… Maybe she was going about this wrong… At the least, the stone shouldn't melt. Shouldn't. She didn't know for sure.

She sat down and frowned at the quartz, trying to make a mental image of Sesshoumaru with black hair and no markings, and tie it to the beads with a string of her power. This was giving her a headache…a few minutes later, she sighed and sat back, rubbing her forehead. "Ok…I have no idea if this'll work, but here goes." She stood up and walked over, beads in hand.

Sesshoumaru silently reached for the beads. He really, really didn't like doing this. Bad enough he had to pretend that he was human…but now he was a guinea pig too. He picked up the beads, and almost immediately dropped them. The beads hissed at him, and smoke rose from where his skin had touched the quartz.

He looked at the necklace's image burned into his palm, and raised an eyebrow. "The idea is illusion, not purification." A purifying rosary was almost as bad as having a melted string of beads in his hands. Or around his neck. Idiot girl _would_ kill him yet, at this rate…but no. That wasn't entirely fair…she had said she was only guessing. Perhaps it was her fault for not training when she could have, but they'd have to make do for now.

Kagome put her hands to her mouth, and winced. She hadn't meant to do that! "I'm so sorry! I just…erg. I don't know what I'm doing." She sat down heavily, looked at the burn marks, and winced. "Want some ice for that?"

He shook his head. It wasn't a large burn. It wouldn't heal as fast as a normal welt, since it was made with a miko's purification power, but it would be fine soon enough. He didn't need **her** help. A human's help. Rather amusing, considering why he was sitting here in the first place. To _get_ her help…even if she'd offered it in the first place, and he hadn't asked.

"You're sure?"

He nodded again. Kagome sat back with a sigh, and shook the stupid rosary. "I might as well just ask the stupid beads to make you look like a human…." She glared at the necklace, and removed the knot of invisible power on it.

The beads flickered and glowed softly. Slowly a hazy image appeared in the center of the necklace. Kagome stared at it. "What on earth…?"

The image grew a little larger. It was hazy still, but she could tell it looked almost like Inuyasha had on new moon nights. "You mean to say all I had to do was **_ask_**!" She wanted to bang her head on the _wall_. All those headaches for nothing! It looked like all she'd had to do to get the damn beads working was _ask _them after all! No! All that for **nothing**?

She lived in a shrine, and she knew everything had a spirit within it. So why not ask the 'spirit of the beads'…?

She should have known. Gods, she was an idiot sometimes. "Ok. So all I had to do was ask and go from there…let's just make sure." She grinned tiredly. "Please, beads, make him look like a human." Kagome tried to keep a picture of what she thought Sesshoumaru would look like as a human in mind. There had to be an image for the beads to work with. That at least, she knew for sure. But it was difficult…

She'd managed to turn his hair a mental black, but there would still be markings. Or the markings went, but the hair remained white, in her mind. She just could not see him like that!

The beads didn't do anything to let her know of success, but she had a feeling that they would work. She held them out again, commenting "And if this doesn't do it, I give up!" That was true enough…her head was starting to really hurt. She would have to get something for it soon, if it got any worse. And besides, she'd run out of ideas.

Tying the image of a human to the rosary had only melted the beads, or turned them into a purifying force. (Although she now …sort of…knew how to purify something…) Asking might work, but if it didn't, what then? If one needed a special ritual or chant to do this, she was out of luck.

Sesshoumaru hesitated to pick up the necklace again. His hand would be healed soon enough, but he wasn't terribly keen on repeating the experience of getting himself singed. Oh well. Kagome had said this was her last attempt. At the least, there would be no more accidental attempts to purify him after this.

He picked up the beads, and was pleasantly surprised. Even if she hadn't gotten them to work, at least she'd managed to keep her purifying power in check.

He slipped it over his head, and pulled his hair out of the way awkwardly with his hand. He didn't feel any different…perhaps they would do nothing.

Wonderful. Useless beads. The whole thing would be pointless…

Kagome stared at him for a moment, then burst out laughing. The necklace was working alright…but it hadn't done exactly what she thought it would. She needed to work on her mental imagery…

Alright…the beads **had** done something to him. She wouldn't be laughing at him otherwise. Imprudent human. What had happened? Did it work?

Kagome smiled widely. She hadn't meant to do some of this…the rosary had changed Sesshoumaru's hair from silver to black, and his eyes, and had left the clothes alone. That was what she'd wanted. But the rest…!

His tail had magically turned into a very long, very woolly, scarf. That alone would have been amusing. However…the beads had somehow rearranged his face. The stripes over his eyes now looked like really, really bad eyeliner. And the stripes on his cheeks, and crescent moon had somehow migrated to his lips. It looked like he had on badly applied blue and burgundy lipstick…

She looked at his hands, and laughed harder as she saw what had happened to the stripes there. They'd moved to his nails…she was willing to bet the same had happened to his feet. Red nail polish!

Sesshoumaru looked at Kagome, and frowned. He didn't care for the laughter. He was supposed to inspire fear, not hysterics, in humans…although Kagome hadn't once been truly afraid so far. What was going on here?

He reached out with a hand to hold onto his tail, a bad habit of his. He frowned as he felt wool…and at the same time, fur. He uncurled his tail slightly, wanting to make sure it was fine. He was puzzled as to why Kagome laughed even harder.

The way she saw it, the 'scarf' had suddenly decided to move on its own…she tried to stop laughing, and failed miserably. She'd have to try talking to the beads again…people would think Sesshoumaru really **was** a girl now…

This was too much. He couldn't see what was so funny, and he wanted to know. Had he grown an extra head or something? He moved so he could see his reflection in the mirror. He hated being laughed at. He did not suffer fools, and even less when it was him being made the idiot.

He cautiously looked at the mirror, not sure what he'd find. Had she managed to make him look like a denizen of this time? He would just have to look and see, wouldn't he?

He stared at the glass, not sure what to say to his reflection. He had black hair, and a scarf. His eyes were brown. And something very, very wrong had happened to his skin. He didn't think humans had blue lips…he looked like a bloody courtesan! It was entirely unacceptable.

He'd expected the color change in the hair, since only older humans had silver coloring, but what had happened to his lips? It looked like he had makeup on, which would never happen. Markings over eyelids were one thing, but the paint that female humans of the court, and even youkai used was not something he planned on wearing.

Although…technically he wasn't wearing it. It was all just an illusion…a very **bad** one, he might add. He looked at his hand, wondering what the red decorating his short, blunt human nails was. It didn't look like the right shade for blood….the same thing must have happened with the markings around his wrist as the ones on his face. The color must have moved onto his claws…but why?

He hoped Kagome hadn't decided to give him this appearance on purpose. He would be most…displeased…if she had. His facial features were the same, minus the hair color and migrated markings, but the red on his claws had to go…and the colored lips. They would be gone as soon as possible, if he had anything to say about it. He did not want to look like some…courtesan…

Bad enough he looked human…but far, far worse that he looked like a female one. If she had managed to make him look like this, surely she could change the disguise a bit!

He wasn't sure what he'd do if she'd done it on purpose. (Killing, usually the answer, wasn't an option anymore). But he'd do something. And it would be terrifying. Unless…

He didn't care for the looks of his face, but if paint was commonly used here, as it was in some parts of the known world, or it was a symbol of rank, something that would allow him freedom of movement within this new world, he would consider letting it stay. If _not_…"What is this?"

He pointed in the vague direction of his face, settling his (unhappily) wooly tail on his other shoulder with an irritable twitch.

Kagome gasped for breath and held her stomach. Ouch…that had hurt…she must have popped a rib or something…the sight of Sesshoumaru examining his nails almost set her off again. Gods…he looked like a girl who'd broken into her mother's makeup cabinet! Except for the fact that he was far too tall, he looked almost _exactly_ like the time she had snuck into her moms room and gotten into her makeup when she was four. Her mom still had the incriminating pictures hidden somewhere against her wedding day…

"Well, what is it?" He nearly tapped his foot, but stilled himself. He was angry, but it would not show. He wasn't going to let her know the full extent of his displeasure until he knew _exactly_ how he'd ended up looking like this…

Kagome's eyes crinkled as she started laughing again. That 'scarf'…it kept moving around, as though he was irritated no end.

…which he probably was… She tried to control herself, but didn't succeed. "It's…nail polish."

"Nail polish. I see. And _why_ is it on my nails?" Unbeknownst to him, his foot started tapping again. He kept his voice even, and waited impatiently. This had better be _damn_ good, or Heads Would Roll…

"I…don't…know…" She got out between fits of giggles. She really didn't have a clue what had gone wrong. Kagome looked down, starting to calm. It really wasn't that funny, and he had to hate her laughing at him, but…he just looked so…so…she grinned as she caught sight of one bare foot tapping slightly, and giggled again as the red on the short, human nails went up and down. At least she'd managed to disguise the talons…

She put her hand to her mouth, and collapsed in silent laughter on the bed. "I'll be fine…it's just…put on heels and it'd be exactly like…" …exactly like that time when she was little! Her mom had laughed so hard at Kagome's four year old self, walking around in high heels ten sizes too big, lipstick to her ears and proud as a peacock, decked out in brilliant blue eye shadow and matching stiletto shoes, trying desperately not to fall over…

"Very well. Try again. Unless it is necessary to…look like this..." a faint frown crossed his face at that, something even Kagome noticed. Damn…he must be really ticked off…

"No no, of course not! I'll try harder, I promise!" She tried _very_ hard to banish any thoughts of herself at four, of Sesshoumaru with makeup, and of his normal appearance, leaving herself with just the image she wanted. Black hair, brown eyes, invisible non-scarf tail. And absolutely no nail polish.

Sesshoumaru looked at her suspiciously. She sounded sincere, as though she had made an honest mistake. Kagome never lied if she could help it. And she was trying to fix it. Thank goodness for that. He had not been please at having to disguise himself as human, let alone one decked out like _that_…

Fine. She'd never done this before. One mistake was allowable. But it had better not happen again. Or he would dispense with not letting people see him angry, and give her a fright. Not that he would hurt her. Just scare her a little, to let her know who she was dealing with…nobody made a fool of him and got away with it…

He wordlessly handed her the necklace, and, a few minutes later, she handed it back just as silently, hoping that she'd managed to do it right…she'd tried really, really hard. And she hoped it worked…

Sesshoumaru awkwardly put the cool stone string over his head, and felt it settle into place. This had better work…or there would be one very angry youkai, and one frightened miko…

Kagome watched, half afraid of what might happen. And then she bit the inside of her mouth, shocked…oh shit…don'tlaughdon'tlaugh,don'tlaugh…

She fell over and started shaking, mirth finally escaping from behind the hands on her mouth.

1111111111111111

Grampa jumped as the sounds of hysteria filtered through to his room. He put down his miniature rice scrolls, and decided to go look in on Kagome. He hoped she was alright…what was going on in her room? It sounded like there were several people in there all laughing themselves sick… and he'd have sworn that there was only their family in the house, not a bunch of teenagers…

He opened the door…and blinked.

What on earth was this…person…doing here? What was his granddaughter doing, inviting a strange girl home without letting him know about it? She might be able to get away with letting Sesshoumaru stay here, but he was not going to let her bring home every barmy person she met on the street!

And what on earth was so funny?

Kagome wiped here eyes, and covered her mouth with a hand. She had _not_ meant to bring that old, forgotten-till-now picture back to life. She really hadn't. She hoped Sesshoumaru saw reason. He looked distinctly irritated.

Sesshoumaru looked pointedly at the mirror, and looked back at Kagome. Judging by the reaction, he'd just gone from bad to worse. He narrowed his eyes at the neon blue shoes, and at the ridiculous paint job on his face. It looked like a blind two year old had been let loose with cosmetics! He had no idea where on earth the jewelry had come from, but it looked awful. And he had no clue as to _what_ the hell she'd done to his poor tail, but it was pink. _Bright pink_! And it had _feathers_…disgusting…

She was going to _die_ for this one…

"_Kagome_…." He didn't care if she saw how angry he was or not. She could quake on the bed for all he cared, and be well served. This was not what he wanted to happen. If he was going to be forced to look human, at least it would be as a decent, _normal_ one. Not some outlandish, female delinquent! He wouldn't suffer further insult to his dignity!

Kagome wiped an eye, and grinned helplessly, still not able to stop even though she knew death was glaring at her from behind the illusion. It was an accident he looked like that picture! All that…she hadn't meant to, at any rate….but oh gods, it was hilarious….

Sesshoumaru held up his arm to look at the strange pastel material on it, glowering at it and the jewelry that had suddenly appeared as though it was there simply to offend him.

Things didn't improve for him once he noticed the fact her grandfather had come into the room. He glowered at him. Bad enough that he was seen in such a state by one person, but two…!

He didn't even know if he'd be attacked as yet another demon or not. Hopefully, not. The idea behind the illusion was to make him appear human so he could avoid that sort of thing. If he was set upon, it would be an indication of failure. Or perhaps just a clue as to Kagome's incompetence…

He'd had more than enough of this. He'd been **far** too patient. "What did you do this time?" He almost jumped as his voice rang out. She'd even done something to the way he spoke! He sounded like a squashed chipmunk! The white of his eyes started bleeding towards red. Wretched, imprudent _wench_! His tail twitched in irritation.

Oh gods…he even _sounded_ like her when she was little! With slightly red eyes…and a twitching, irritated neon feather boa….Kagome abruptly stopped laughing, aware she'd finally gotten him really angry. She blinked as it eventually registered that her grampa had come to see about the noise.

Shit…this was going from bad to worse…

Sesshoumaru hooked his fingers around the necklace and took it off, scowling. The illusionary fashion bomb vanished.

Grampa jumped a foot back, eyes wide. It had been the **pest**! What was he **doing,** dressed up like that?

Oh no…! Not only was he a demonic pest, but he was a crossdresser as well…Kagome simply had to see they couldn't keep him in the house after this…! "What's going on in here? Who's she?"

_She_? He was _not_ a girl. Kagome was to blame…_all_ her fault…Sesshoumaru's eyes remained slightly tinged with red.

Kagome swallowed slightly, choosing her words with care. "Remember, I told you I was going to try doing an illusion on him? It didn't…work the way it was…supposed to." She bit her lip, fighting not to laugh. That would make things even worse…poor Sesshoumaru, he must be so embarrassed…

His granddaughter had the most amazing talent for understating the obvious. So…this was something she had cooked up? She was really getting good at this miko stuff…maybe he could get her to make a scroll for his bedroom…and then he could figure out how she'd made it and duplicate it to get rid of Sesshoumaru-the-pest…

"First, it moved his stripes around, so it looked like he had lipstick on and stuff…accident...and then I don't know what happened." Kagome blinked slowly. "I was thinking about the time I got into mom's makeup box because it reminded me of…you remember? And I don't know why it did that, but he ended up looking the part…I'm sorry, Sesshoumaru. I didn't try to do anything like that, honestly!"

Idiot. She couldn't keep her mind straight, and then took it out on him! Wretched woman…even if the first time hadn't turned out, she should have got the trick of it after that! Idiotic, incompetent human fiend….he seethed in silence, not trusting himself to comment.

There was very little he could do to her. He would not stoop to being petty, and the normal sentence for a crime like this was death. Which wasn't an option, here. He could do scarcely anything to her except scare her half to death.

He felt suddenly disgusted with himself for thinking of doing that. Stooping to frightening humans, like some common, powerless joke of a youkai. He was all the more angry with her for it, and with himself. He was being a fool for letting her get under his skin, creep behind the iron curtains of self discipline, to provoke him. Nobody had ever managed to make him so angry over practically nothing…this was utterly shameful.

He clamped down on the emotion, and shunted it away with an icy will. Stop clenching his hand, and stop letting the very tip of his tail twitch slowly with controlled rage. He took a breath, and let it out slowly. Under control…

Poor grampa watched all this, completely confused. So the pest wasn't a crossdresser after all…? He _still_ ought to be kicked out of the shrine though…even if it was an accident, there was still the matter of the Higurashi family's safety to keep in mind!

"I think…I need to try again, and have a very clear picture this time…" Kagome had **no** idea how the boa had ended up in her mental image. She could understand the way she'd accidentally recreated that picture, since it had been on her mind, but the thought of pink feathers had _never_ been a part of it. She hadn't meant for any of it to be there at all…while enormously entertaining, Sesshoumaru in stiletto's and excessive lipstick (not to mention seeing red!) was…frightening…

She **needed **to get better control…

She would do more than try again, this time. She would get it _right_! He held out the necklace.

"Do not do that again. I have no wish to look even more the fool." Smooth and firm, leaving no room for argument. He was glad to see his iron control hadn't weakened. He was calm again, on the outside at least. He'd caught the slight flash of fright on her eyes, and it had only served to shame him further. It hadn't really been her fault. No need to show Kagome, or her grampa, how angry he still was. It served no purpose, and would make a bad situation worse. Sinking to frightening humans…he was falling apart.

Kagome blushed and hung her head, meekly taking the necklace back from him "I'm sorry…I'll try harder. No more screw-ups with lipstick."

Grandpa left the room, shaking his head. What the world was coming to, he didn't know. Illusionary lipstick and youkai in his shrine, and Kagome making these things happen…

He didn't want to see any more magical mistakes. At least the pest hadn't been dressed up on purpose. He didn't need to worry about **that**, thank heavens…

Sesshoumaru watched him leave, and then sighed. At least he must have looked like a human, since the old man hadn't attacked him on sight. A very small good thing to have come out of this…if him appearing mortal was 'good'.

"Never mind grampa. Let's try that again. Why don't you make a picture of what you want in your head? Let's see if it works, and I can get the beads to use your own picture. It is your illusion after all…" Something to pacify him…and if he did no better than she had, maybe he wouldn't get quite so angry…

That made sense. He would make damn sure _not_ to look foolish that way. If it worked. When it came right down to it, he knew even less of this kind of power than she. He knew to avoid purification power, and how to tell how strong it was, and other things related to battle, but not much else. Sesshoumaru formed his own picture in his head, angrily creating a mental image that would work, and adding the necessary changes to scents, and so on. He was willing to bet Kagome had never thought to change that.

Kagome hoped it turned out better than the last attempt. Hopefully he had better control…and a better picture. She concentrated as well, focusing on taking the picture from his mind, rather than hers, pouring her whole heart into making it. She really was sorry about all this.

She tossed him the beads, and he caught them easily, putting them on again. This had better work, or he was going to wash his hands of it right here and now, pride or no. He was getting **very** tired of being her guinea pig. If this did not work, he'd be out of this stuffy little room and go cool off outside. Outside…he'd go and practice his forms again. He had been sadly remiss in that of late…

He was almost afraid to look at the mirror, but he brought himself to do it. Get it over and done with.

He sighed softly in relief.

It had finally worked for him. He had fairly good mental control. Better than what Kagome had, at any rate. It didn't take much for him to make a picture and hold it in place. Brown eyes, unmarked skin, and blunt nails. Dark hair, slightly shortened. An invisible tail, and rounded ears.

He found it oddly disturbing to look at himself in the mirror, as though his essence had been drained out and replaced with a stranger's. He was youkai, not human. He was not one of them, no matter what he looked like. In this time he was completely alone, the solitary sand grain of a lost race, washed away by the tide.

Where were they? Where were the youkai? He had never been close to anyone, no one but Rin. Not family, and he'd not had a lover in years. But without even the peripheral presence of his own kind, a familiar face or time, he felt alone in a way he never had before.

Kagome smiled. This time it had worked pretty well. Human Sesshoumaru, minus the markings…and without makeup. Or a pink feather boa. Actually…his tail was completely gone. It hadn't even been turned into a scarf. She felt mildly disappointed at that, but let it go. A scarf would probably attract attention going into the hot summer months anyway. "Bravo." She flopped back on the bed, and sighed, suddenly very tired.. "Ohh….headache. That was hard…."

'_You have no idea'_ **She** thought it had been hard? All she'd done was make him look like an idiot. It had been hard **not** to kill her…Sesshoumaru took the beads off, and put them on the desk next to Shiro's house. Now that he had the charm, he didn't really want to wear it any more than he had to. It felt like it was choking him. If he decided to go out for instance he'd put it on, but not now.

He still wasn't sure he'd go out like _that_ anyway. He had to get back home before he got desperate enough for fresh air to use the cursed beads…Why should he, Sesshoumaru, pretend to be a human? Why did he have to hide from humans? Why couldn't he simply go home, and back to what he was used to?

Simple. He was stuck here, until he managed to get though the damn barrier, or Kagome did. None of those things would work. Humans ruled here, and he would be forced to imitate them to survive.

Why was he surviving again…?

Oh yes…..to have a chance at revenge. To have a slight chance at reclaiming lands he felt no particular attachment to. For Rin.

He would revenge her…for himself. He knew she wouldn't have cared. But he did.

"You're not wearing it? After what we just went though? Ungrateful youkai!" Kagome laughed, and then winced. Oww….her head was going to explode. She got up slowly. "I need Tylenol right now…why don't you go show mom that necklace? I worked hard on it, and I told her I'd show her when I was done…"

Perhaps that had been a stupid promise. She knew Sesshoumaru was mad at her. He had reasons enough. She slipped out of the room. Which would happen first? Her head imploding, or the Tylenol working in time?

Right. He was now her show and tell project, in addition to being a guinea pig. Wonderful. "I think not." He was not going to let her get away with ordering _him_ around. He wasn't anything like his brother. He wasn't going to roll over for her.

He almost pitied Inuyasha for putting up with Kagome's whims, at this point. Why had his brother ever lowered himself to running around for her? Unless….

Hadn't he done the same for Rin? All those pauses in meadows, just so she could rip up flowers? Getting her AhUn for her to ride, when her feet grew tired. Letting her have previously unknown liberties with his tail. (Why had he ever let her braid flowers…and the dirt that came with them…into his fur? Why had he let her…?)

He had loved her, as he might have one day loved one of his own…it was sad to say, but the truth of the matter was that the—former—Taiyoukai of the west had been at the mercy of a little girl's innocent whims. Youkai did not often form any attachments to anyone, human, youkai, or otherwise. They skittered on the surface, cool and detached, the bonds that held them resting lightly in place. When you lived for centuries, you simply didn't become that involved. But when they did, rarely, form a connection, the bond was deep.

If Rin wanted flowers, she somehow got flowers. If she was cold at night, he had once or twice lent her the use of his tail. If she didn't sleep, she got a soft song, and a wry smile in the dark where no one could see. He'd heard of humans doing that, though his mother certainly hadn't. She'd been ruthless in her attention while teaching, and just as devoted to ignoring him otherwise. He hadn't done these things for Rin at first, but by the end…

He was no better than father, or Inuyasha. He'd been wrapped around a little girl's finger as surely as they had been. Of course…Rin was dead now. As were the both of them. He would never let someone close again, weaken himself again. He did not need to be. Sesshoumaru was determined never to get that close to anyone again.

Everyone he had ever trusted a little had been proven a weakness. They had died, and hurt him in the process, opened the way for enemies. Not their fault. His. He wouldn't let himself be hurt like that again.

He would try to do better than his father and his brother had done. Even mother…her passion had killed her.

Kagome reappeared, Tylenol in hand "Honestly…Grampa's practically camped outside the door. I don't know why he dislikes you this much." What had Sesshoumaru done to get grampa this mad at him? Inuyasha had never been hounded like this. At least not for as long as Sesshoumaru…

"Did you do anything, other than block the scroll he had?" Maybe there was some reason…or not. Her grampa was reason enough all by himself.

No answer. Kagome sighed, and stuck her head out into the halfway. "Grampa, he's hasn't done anything. Why don't you lay off making scrolls?"

"What scrolls?" Grampa smiled innocently.

He really was a horrible liar. "The ones I can tell you're making, that's what."

"He attacked me! He was going to kill me! He had these awful flaming red eyes, and he had his sword, and…"

Kagome raised an eyebrow. "A sword?"

"Well…."

"When I got there, there was no sword." Toukijin had stayed in her closet collecting dust, for the most part.

"Um…yes…but his eyes were red!"

She really doubted that. He was probably making that up as well. Sesshoumaru had only ever had red eyes when he was transforming…or exceptionally angry, like just now. She shivered slightly. She did not need a homicidal youkai on her hands. Maybe she should try walking softly…no.

He wouldn't attack her or her family now. She didn't know why she knew that, but she did. Kagome trusted that. The only person she had ever known to get him that mad at was Inuyasha, or Naraku, both dead. And her, of course, for daring to dress him in drag… "He wasn't ever going to kill you. Isn't that right, Sesshoumaru?"

He decided not to answer that one. Truth be known, the old man **had** been a second away from death at his hands. Brought on by the old fool himself, perhaps…but not entirely. It was also partly due to his own loss of control. He still felt shame over that. He had been an idiot…

"Right?" Kagome frowned at him.

He closed his eyes, and sighed. He refused to answer this. He wouldn't lower himself to lying over something this trivial. Not that lying would help, at this point, if he was the sort of person to lie. Kagome already suspected something. And he just didn't feel like answering her at this point. Not after what she did to him…

Kagome frowned at him. Didn't he see there was a perfect opportunity to get grampa off his back here? Why didn't he just say he'd never put her grampa in any danger and let it go at that? Unless…

Was there something she didn't know? Something that she ought to find out about? She frowned, and closed the door after a minute of strained silence. "You had a perfect way to make him leave you alone right there. Why didn't you say something?"

Sesshoumaru declined to answer that one as well. He didn't feel in the mood for favors after her…insolence…this afternoon. This was something he wasn't going to explore with her. He didn't want to think of it himself. She could stand there till the end of the world, tapping her foot, and it would make no difference to him. Much. Sesshoumaru was being petty, but he was just angry enough not to care.

He watched as she crossed her arms, waiting for some sort of explanation. It was clear she expected an answer.

Let her expect it. He wouldn't give her one. He wasn't answerable to her.

His eyes fell on the beads, and he stood up abruptly, putting the beads on and reaching for his sword. This was going nowhere…he might as well do something useful. Like practice the forms of the sword.

"Hey! Where do you think you're going?"

Kagome stamped her foot, and cursed under her breath. Arrogant, stupid, stuck up, rotten _Fluffy_. After all she'd done today, too! True, he hadn't wanted an illusion…and he had probably hated looking as silly as she'd made him look, and was still angry...but…gah! This was **important**! He had no right to just take off like that! "Fluffy! You jerk!"

She laughed humorlessly as the door shut. Why had she expected him to be reasonable? He was still an arrogant lord, fresh from feudal Japan. He'd been used to people groveling at his feet, not demanding information like the Spanish Inquisition.

Still. This was something she had to know about. Maybe nothing more than haughtiness on his part, but still…if he had ever meant to harm _one__hair_ on her grampa's head…

She didn't know what to think. She couldn't get rid of him. Anything he'd planned, or done, wouldn't change the way he was going to be staying with them. What could they do with him?

They couldn't turn him out. He was dangerous, and completely ignorant. Almost as scary was the thought of him wandering around, knowing exactly how her world worked.

Nobody won here. He didn't like being stuck in 'her world' though, so that was something. If she ever managed to get the well working, then he'd go back gladly. That would solve some of her problems, at least. Plus, she herself could go home.

Of course…then what would her family do for money? They needed the income from her job, and her help in maintenance. The shrine was really starting to go downhill. Even with the check from her own job, she wasn't sure it would be enough. She'd tried to be optimistic…but…

She had taken over most of what her grampa did, over the last year. She kept the tiny gift shop open some days, and cleaned everything….and then cleaned at the museum….but everyone else was busy. Souta had school, and had to study for exams…something she should have done more of, perhaps. He couldn't help as much.

School wasn't a priority now for her. She'd keep her job at the museum, or go back home. School wasn't needed for either. Still…in any other circumstances, she'd have been a lot more worried about her future.

Souta needed to have time to work on school things. He'd been having problems lately…

Besides…her brother didn't know anything about the state of the Higurashi finances. She wasn't going to tell him, when her mom had decided not to. He knew things were hard, but not how bad they really were. She didn't think her mom had done the right thing, leaving him out, but it was Mom's choice.

So. Souta was out for most of the work, as was grampa. There was no _way _she was going to ask her grampa to clean an entire courtyard, or storehouse. If anything, she'd have steered him back inside and taken the cleaning supplies away. He was getting too old and fragile to be doing too much work. He'd never admit it, but he just couldn't do it…and the thought of him climbing ladders was scary. Mom was out for the most part too, as she worked. She couldn't stop and turn her attention to just the shrine, or they would be even worse off than they were now.

Besides, even if her mom had focused on only the shrine, it might not have been enough…

That left her. And Buyo. And Sesshoumaru.

Fat chance she'd ever get **them** to clean house…stupid Sesshoumaru…why he couldn't just say something when it was her family at stake…? Kagome seethed silently, and glared at the door frame. Fluffy no Baka…

* * *

_Mwahahah. I think I've been having **far** too much fun tormenting poor Sesshy...XD Oh well. Hopefully you all enjoyed. lol. If you did like it (or if you didn't!), please tell me! I love hearing feedback, good or bad! (smiles hopefully. Still trying to break into the double digits with reviews per chapter...)_


	13. ch12:Stormy Water

**: Stormy Water :**

Kagome scowled, and picked up the broom. She'd finish dusting the shrine later. She had been neglecting some of the work around home lately because of Sesshoumaru. She tucked her hair back behind her ears, and headed out towards the storehouse. She would wait till he was gone to do the courtyard. She didn't even want to _see_ the jerk right now.

Come to think of it, that courtyard hadn't been washed in ages…it could use it, probably. Yet one more thing that had slid while she was preoccupied with work.

She picked up the dust cloth, and brought it with her to the storehouse. Long shelves of antiques and dusty wood met her eyes, and she sighed.

Souta had tried to be helpful, and clean, but he hadn't _quite_ grasped the concept of 'clean above eye level' yet. The lower shelves were spotless, but about 1.5 meters off the floor, the dust began.

Kagome simply put down the broom, and finished what he'd missed. Once she'd finished with the dusting, the broom was put to use. She gripped the handle furiously, attacking the dust with a will.

The nerve of him!

He hadn't even answered a stupid…(well, not stupid, it was a matter of _life and death_!)…little question. This was her _family_ they were talking about here! All she'd asked him was to say yes, and tell grampa he'd had no intention of harming him.

Was he just being an arrogant, silent irritant, or had he _really_ thought about hurting Grampa?

She wouldn't put it past him. Rin or no Rin, he wasn't a warm cuddly person. If you compared him to a teddy bear, he'd probably sniff and then melt the poor bear. Or not. She had to remember she didn't really know anything about him. He might be halfway decent. Might. Big 'might' there.

Other than the fact he'd taken in a little girl, was lord of the west, related to Inuyasha, wanted Tetsusaiga, and apparently had been trained to sing at some point, she knew little. It was still rather interesting to think of him getting music lessons. Kagome couldn't picture him sitting and playing piano — well, not piano, it wasn't around back then, but — She wanted to know when that had happened. And why he'd even bothered to learn.

Had he been about to hurt grampa? Would he really do that to the family that had taken him in, however unwanted the assistance had been?

She hadn't thought he'd do something like that. No matter what he'd done, he'd always seemed to have a personal set of rules. He'd never broken whatever those rules were. She didn't know what kinds of expectations he had for himself, other than that they were probably high.

Probably something along the lines of Bushido. Honor, justice and courage, benevolence, politeness, loyalty, wisdom, self control, and a love of learning. From what she'd seen, he acted along these lines. Or somewhat along those lines, at any rate.

As she recalled, family was important to Bushido. Her family was one of the most important things in the world to her, and she would not forgive someone for bringing harm to them. She ground her teeth, still scowling horrifically at the dust.

Sesshoumaru, on the other hand, was somewhat of a mystery. He had always seemed to hate Inuyasha, and had tried to kill him. But, when he was given opportunity, he hadn't.

There had been times when he'd helped them. It had been Sesshoumaru who stopped Inuyasha's rampage when he'd lost his mind. He had fought alongside their group, albeit unwillingly, when the need arose.

Puzzling. Irritating. Maddening, was more like it. She gripped the broom, and waved it at the door menacingly. "Ooooh….you had better tell me what's going on….or….or…" Or what? What was she going to do with him? Hit him with a broom?

She didn't know…quite apart from teasing him, there wasn't much she could really do. She could hardly get rid of him. She was shocked she'd even considered it.

Kagome sighed, and leaned into the wall. Stupid, stupid, stupid Sesshoumaru. Stupid Fluffy. Kagome smiled. Oh yes, she'd forgotten about that. He'd probably hate being called Fluffy.

It was a petty way to get back at him, but just then, Kagome was feeling a little petty. She finished up with the dust quickly, and set out to put the cleaning supplies away, and get a bucket. She might as well deal with the courtyard while she thought of it, whether or not he was dancing around with his sword out there. She'd clear him out by tossing the soapy water at him, if need be.

He'd probably just _love_ that option…

Once she started cleaning, there was going to be no interruption. She didn't enjoy being interrupted, because it meant she'd have to keep cleaning longer than necessary. Which translated to her being even more irritated with the person who interrupted her.

One day, she really needed to get Souta working on this job…he had lots on his plate with school, but he could probably managed the occasional courtyard scrub. It would do him good to learn him to dust properly.

Kagome opened the front door, and once inside fixed up a bucket of soapy water. Courtyard, watch out.

She opened the door, and blinked as she noticed Sesshoumaru on the other side of the doorframe.

1111111

Sesshoumaru moved quickly, silently, necklace flowing around his neck like water, black hair flying behind him. He spun, and sliced at imaginary opponents. It would have been better with a dojo to use, but there was a notable lack thereof, so he made do without. At the least, there was an open area for him to practice in. Toukijin whistled thought the air, and he gracefully moved with it.

Nearly a week after waking from imprisonment, he was no closer to finding a solution to breaking though the barrier than he had been at first. It was maddening…to know that, only a few paces away, the entrance to his home lay…

And yet he couldn't get there! No matter what he tried, it hadn't worked. Toukijin wasn't strong enough. Perhaps Tetsusaiga…but the sword still rejected him. That wouldn't work either!

Of course, he had thought about combining his strength with Kagome's a few times. That had never been tried before. Probably because it seemed somehow wrong…he didn't need Kagome's help to get through. He wasn't that desperate yet. And after what had just happened, he was not going to go anywhere near her. He wasn't sure he could stay calm.

His sword swung up cleanly, and he flowed though the movements easily. Practice was always soothing, a way to compose one's thoughts.

It didn't seem to be working as well as he'd hoped.

He was sure Kagome was angry. He certainly was. It wasn't his problem, and he didn't really care one way or the other, but it did cut down on any questions he might have asked. About Christmas, or asking to see what the grey forest of buildings beyond the shrine looked like. Questions about how to get through to what he thought of as the 'real' Japan. She would probably be most uncooperative if he brought those up now. She might even demand…demand! That he give her answers to her own questions.

Swish…the sword whistled softly, sweet, steel song of death emanating from the wind of its passage. He was suspended in the movement, calm as ice. As it should be. He couldn't afford to be angry, especially now. Anger was not useful unless it was controlled, rage fueled into actions. Sesshoumaru stepped back form his anger, examining it, and the reasons it had come into being.

Perhaps…he was being unfair. She had done nothing but treat him with courtesy since he got here. She had understood his confusion, and had generally been there to ask questions of when other duties were not keeping her busy. She had done more than was strictly needed, now that he thought of it. Kagome had genuinely wanted to help him. Apart from her…unfortunate…'accident' with the illusions (And it probably had been an accident, at least at first. He knew she was hopelessly unskilled when it came to her powers…)

He didn't want help. But still, he knew he needed it. She'd been nothing but accommodating. Was it really so hard for him to answer one tiny question? Couldn't he just accept how things were, and deal with it? No…

He knew he'd have to set aside his anger over the beads incident, and he _had_ managed to set most of it aside. He could control himself enough to hide it completely. It was a skill he'd learned long ago to survive, and it wouldn't fail him now. He would work with her because he had to. He couldn't escape her forever. They were stuck in the same house, and he, at least, wasn't going to break his word and leave. She had work to get her away, but there was no other choice for him. He _needed_ her help and goodwill.

Nonsense. It was all nonsense. He was a lord. He bowed to none, and was beholden to no one. She should not expect him to be at her beck and call. He did not allow himself to be made a fool. Even if he was a landless, nameless youkai. Much as he hated to admit it, Damia had won the right to the west from him; youkai law was very simple. You held on with strength, ruling by right of conquest. He might have been the son of a lord, but to prove his right to the throne he had had to survive. She ruled now. Not that that was going to stop something so fundamental as revenge…

He sighed slightly. He had been a fool for going along with the illusions idea in the first place, and more a fool still for wearing the idiot thing this moment. He had a sudden urge to rip them off and melt them with acid, but resisted. He did not want to even consider going through fire again to get another rosary made. He'd far rather take the fire…

He knew why he needed one. It would make moving around so much easier, and meant Kagome would let…_let_ him out of the house and off the grounds. And, deep down, he was thankful for her help. _Very_ deep down.

This was truly intolerable, living like this, but these were the cards fate had dealt. He was in no position to be doing things like threatening her family. Certainly he had been a little foolish when he'd refused to answer the questions earlier. He shouldn't have to, of course, but it was a logical thing for Kagome. She'd only inquired after the safety of loved ones. He could have said he had entertained the idea of hurting her grampa, nothing more.

Or not. Not answering, and therefore not having to lie about 'never hurting the old man' worked too.

Still….he felt the faintest traces of guilt. He was imposing on her, even if she had told him why he must stay. He had threatened her family, however unintentionally. He had been amiss in walking out when she was concerned he might have put her grandsire in danger.

She was simply protecting what was hers. Exactly as he would have done in her place. Was it so hard for him to go back in, and answer the question? All he need say was yes. Nothing more. No need to go into further detail. He suspected she thought of him as someone who wouldn't put up with the nonsense of becoming her grampa's paper project. And she was right. Even had he not lost control, he would not have let the old man off easily. He wasn't an easygoing person. Far from it. He had been raised to be hard but fair, and had remained so long after his father and mother, tutors, were dust.

She knew that, having seen him before. She knew he had been willing to kill his own brother for his crimes, and her as well. She would think nothing amiss if she assumed he had been thinking of harming her family. Not that he had meant to. Not fatally, anyway. Maybe a knock on the head for the old man's audacity in attacking him.

Of course, she _might_ take it personally…

Perhaps she would chalk it up to 'youkai bloodlust' (humans were ridiculously easy to manipulate in that respect. They _always_ thought the worst of his race), and not look further into why he'd been set off like some child who couldn't control himself. He was still angry over that. He should not have given into memory, should not have let himself dwell on what had happened centuries ago. It wasn't worth it.

He was Sesshoumaru. Taiyoukai. Ruler. Ice. Strong. He did not allow himself to be weak. Did not live except by his own personal code of honor. She should know this.

Unfortunately, he wasn't a lord any longer. And he couldn't expect that kind of treatment here, Taiyoukai or not.

Still…he should at least go back inside, and let her get over everything. He wasn't going to go into why he'd been a hair's breath away from killing her grandfather, but he would at least admit he had been considering…more than considering…the notion. Not intentionally, but it had still happened. He owed her that.

He just hoped she would let it go. He didn't particularly care to have to work around an angry female. She had an amazing capacity for getting in his way when mad at him. She'd gotten between him and Inuyasha often enough. He didn't need to push her into accidentally doing something regrettable.

Toukijin whistled to a pause, and he straightened, black hair brushing past his face. He looked at it out of the corner of his eye, and scowled faintly. He really hated this charm. Useful it might be, but it just wasn't right.

He'd go inside and have it off, then. And once he got though that barrier, he'd be free of it.

Sesshoumaru paused just before going in. He could tell that Kagome was on the other side of the door. He didn't move as the door was thrown open, and Kagome stared out at him.

She raised her soapy bucket menacingly, eyes narrowed. "Move it, Fluffy. Or you get wet."

Who was she calling 'Fluffy?' Wench…

"I said, move it!" Kagome lifted the bucket, and would have tagged him with the foamy water if he hadn't jumped back in time. He blinked at the horrific scowl she wore, and cursed.

Looked like she had taken it personally after all. _Damn_. His hands clenched as he thought of the water, but let it go. This was not the time…even if he felt like smashing the bucket on her head in retaliation…

Kagome sniffed, and disappeared inside to get more water. Sesshoumaru decided he would rather wait to talk to her after she'd calmed down, and disappeared upstairs before she could see where he had gone.

He began to see why Inuyasha listened to her. She could be eerily irrational when it came to protecting those she loved. Frightening, almost. Perhaps a bit of caution was needed here…

Still…she hadn't needed to call him Fluffy…he had never had a nickname, and he did not care for this one in the least.

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Kagome glared at the bucket, and marched outside, stepping around the puddle easily. She got down to work, and attacked the flagstones with a furious energy.

Throwing water at him, even if it hadn't landed, had felt good. She was a little less mad than before, at any rate. Maybe she'd ask him nicely to explain himself again.

Of course…if he still didn't say anything, or gave her the brush off, she wasn't going to be responsible for the consequences!

Kagome frowned, imagining dumping water on a sleeping Sess, and then paused. She could hear someone coming up the stairs. She looked up as the footsteps approached, and then smiled as a familiar face came into view. "Hojo! What brings you here?"

"Hi! I came to see how the 'patient' was doing…" He stopped as Kagome sat back and grimaced. "Something wrong?" He looked at the patch of washed stone floor, and shook his head. Kagome really did need to cut back on the workload she had going. Sooner or later, something was going to snap.

"Oh…I think the _patient_ is doing fine." She sniffed. "Up and about, and irritating me no end!"

Hojo wanted to laugh, but didn't. Kagome probably wouldn't appreciate it. But if he was up, that was good….right? "Oh?"

"Stupid Fluffy got grampa mad at him. So grampa's been chasing him around trying to purify him and otherwise get rid of him. I was this close!" She held up her hand, fingers close together. "This close! To getting things patched up! I asked him to just confirm he hadn't really meant to hurt grampa….grampa's still convinced he attacked him, sword and all…rubbish…and he wouldn't. I'm not sure what that means, but it certainly didn't help me!"

Hojo blinked. Fluffy? Interesting nickname…it was a little hard to tell what had been happening, but it hadn't been fun. Had he really threatened someone…? It was possible, from what he'd learned from Kagome.

Oh dear…Kagome really had been doing more than was good for her. Cleaning this, and dealing with Sesshoumaru when he was acting like that? Sesshoumaru had better not hurt his Kagome, or he'd…He watched as she stood up, scowling at the bucket. "Kagome...you should rest a bit more."

"Can't. Gotta finish this. And then it'll be dinner, and…gah." Oh, she wished she could rest. But not now. Way too much for her to do before that could happen. Maybe she should think about dropping some of her Friday miko or martial arts classes….at the least, it would save money. She should do that anyway, really. It would save them money, and give her more time. Actually, it would save _her_ money, rather. She was the one currently paying for those classes.

After all….it wasn't like karate, or learning about the modern miko, was desperately important right now. She would get far better miko training once she got back home, and there had to be another way to get the karate practice in. Maybe Hojo would teach her. Who knew?

…then again, considering she had barely learned how to throw a proper punch, it might not be a good idea to ask him or even Sesshoumaru to teach. They'd laugh themselves sick when she tried to do a roundhouse, and ended up falling over. She hadn't attended many classes, really…just not enough time…

"I'm serious, Kagome. You look more tired every time I see you." He might have pretended it was his patient he was coming over here to see, but in truth he'd wanted to see Kagome even more. It looked like she could use his help far more than Sesshoumaru, at any rate. If the guy was well enough to be wandering around, or 'attacking' people, he probably didn't need him.

Not that he could do much, anyway. He didn't know enough about medicine, much less about youkai. Besides...Youkai healing being what it was, or what he'd been told it was, he would be more use as a third limb.

He took a step closer, wishing he could just hold the woman in front of him tightly, and make everything go away. Sesshoumaru, the past, the bucket by her feet…make it all disappear.

A useless dream. She didn't see him that way, and apparently never had. He could hold her…but he couldn't keep her. She still couldn't let go of the past. It was hers, and she was his…Inuyasha's.

She wasn't Hojo's to love.

Hojo laughed softly. He was as much as prisoner of the past as she. She couldn't let go of Inuyasha…but he could not let go of her. All these years, he'd waited and then found it was not to be. He was still a little bitter because of that, but…it had been sweet while it lasted. If nothing else, he had memories.

What had started out as a schoolboy's crush had turned into one big mess.

Kagome smiled at him, clearly making an effort. She waved him off, "No no, I'll be fine. Once I convince grampa he doesn't need to exorcise Sesshoumaru."

Perhaps there was something he could do for her after all. He doubted that he'd have much luck with Kagome's grandpa, so…he would talk to Sesshoumaru on the pretext checking up on him, and then get him to 'see reason.'

Hojo would have helped her himself, if he could. He'd have come and helped in the shrine for Kagome, but he didn't have enough time. He knew they couldn't afford someone to help out right now. Medical school took most of his spare hours. He had a job, and rent to pay. Much as he'd love to help, he'd been politely refused the one time he'd offered.

So, he'd do the next best thing…make Sesshoumaru do something to help out, instead of causing trouble for her. Perhaps. He had no idea how much luck with that he'd have. He felt a little nervous at the thought…

"No, I suppose he doesn't. I guess I should see how he's doing, since I'm here."

Kagome rolled her eyes. "Trust me, the jerk's fine."

"I just want to make sure…"

She sighed. Hojo was only trying to be helpful "Alright…but don't blame me if he doesn't like it."

Hojo laughed. "I won't mind. Just the way he is, from what you've told me. Apparently I'm lucky enough not to be called lowly human, and trod upon as dirt. Or forcibly removed from his lordship's presence"

"He's not quite _that_ bad…" Both laughed, and turned towards the house.

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He heard the door open, and the sounds of two voices. Kagome's, and the other human….Hojo? He thought it was Hojo, and felt a dull flash of resentment for some reason…why did he care?

He'd see soon enough. It sounded like they were coming upstairs. Most likely to his room.

Sure enough, the door opened within a few minutes. He turned away from the window, and watched as they came in.

Kagome glared at him. "I'll be downstairs." She turned on her heel, and left.

He didn't respond, other than to look back out the window. Too bad she was still angry…he needed her help, unfortunately, and it would be…difficult…if she was being uncooperative. He wished he didn't have to rely on her good will to get back home…

He listened as Hojo walked closer. He could smell the nervousness on the other man.

A familiar reaction. One he understood a lot better than the Higurashi family's. They were far too comfortable around him…Souta had never been anything other than annoying in his presence, and completely without fear. The grandfather was afraid of him, though not much. The mother, Sakura, didn't fear him either.

Kagome occasionally was nervous around him, but not afraid as any normal person would have been, and for all the wrong reasons. She had been nervous about people finding out about him! It wasn't the same as being afraid of the 'monster youkai' occupying her room.

She **certainly** wasn't afraid enough if she felt comfortable enough to mock him…perhaps he should work on that. Although…having someone see him as just Sesshoumaru had been nice, for a bit, instead of the constant jockeying for the attention of Lord Sesshoumaru, ruler of the west he'd gotten at home. Sesshoumaru shook his head, aware that he was being silly. For now it was comfortable to return to something 'normal'. Hojo was very much afraid of him.

"Feeling better, or completely healed?"

He raised an eyebrow at the window pane. The human was concerned about him, was he? Even though he was afraid…somewhat admirable. Nothing came though in his voice either. Only someone with Sesshoumaru's nose would even know how scared the boy was. He didn't bother to turn around, "Healed."

Kagome had been right about everything to do with this guy's conversational skills, at any rate. This was like talking to a stone. Or rather, former stone. Hojo smiled nervously, and then took a long, deep breath. What he planned on saying next might make the other guy mad at him, or get him injured, especially considering the fact that this was Sesshoumaru…someone who sounded a lot like a feudal serial killer, from his point of view.

Although…that wasn't really right. A lot of the lords back then killed lots of people…and Sesshoumaru, at least, wasn't a person who killed for the joy of it. He _hoped_…

This was far too much like braving a lion in its den for his peace of mind, but it would be worth it for Kagome.

"Glad to hear it…" Hojo took a nervous step forward "But you know…you could do something for her. Now you're not sick, you could at least help Kagome out."

Help out? What did he mean? He would be doing no such thing…and certainly, a rich shrine like this had no need of assistance. He didn't pretend to know why Kagome set herself to doing tasks such as cleaning which a servant could easily do, but it wasn't something he'd asked about.

Who knew? Maybe it was a miko practice, or a penance…

Hojo waited for an answer, but none came. He sighed. "I'm serious. I'm sure you can see how tired she is. And the shrine takes a lot of work to run. I'd help if I could, but she won't let me even if I _had_ time. Damn Higurashi pride…"

This was ridiculous. Any shrine that could afford the volumes of containers full of rare spices in the cupboards, or the elegant paintings on the walls that this house had, could afford an army of servants! "That is none of my concern. Why do they not hire someone?"

Now that he thought of it, the reason there were no staff could be because he was living here…which would mean that if they did hire someone, he'd be politely ordered to hide or put on his nice new charmed rosary. If Hojo brought it up, then she could probably now hire someone since that was no longer a concern. If that happened, then he would consent to hiding, or wearing the idiot beads…since it was technically his fault…

Hojo stared at him, and his mouth opened a little. He blinked, flabbergasted that the person sitting on the bed had that poor a grasp on reality. He laughed incredulously. "You…don't know? You don't know what is happening at this shrine?" He knew he himself didn't know all of the details, but he knew enough to see that there was only Kagome and her mother to take care of the shrine, and both had part time jobs. Souta did some things, but not enough. And her grandpa couldn't anymore.

Sesshoumaru knew he was fairly ignorant when it came to this new world, but he disliked having that fact pointed out to him so obviously. "I know how much it costs to maintain the large stock of spice downstairs, and how much a house this size means. The amount of land they own…They can afford a servant. Is there a reason why they do not hire?" He turned his head slightly and watched as Hojo worked his mouth soundlessly.

"You…you…you think this is a rich shrine?" Hojo laughed humorlessly. There was no answer from the bed, only an acute, listening silence. "Jeez …you really _do_ think that…and I suppose it makes sense, from what you know." He was basing their wealth on the contents of their spice cupboard! No wonder…if that were the case, anyone would have thought this a rich house! Mrs. Higurashi stocked enough hot herbs to make an entire_ army_ turn red and run for water!

Kagome had said he was a feudal lord, and she'd been right. The youkai thought as though he lived in Japan's past…Sesshoumaru's present. It was unreal. "In the modern world, those things cost very little. A servant or housekeeper costs a _lot_ more. They can't afford it. Kagome works all week at the museum, and then gets home and works some more. Her mom does the same. Her grampa's getting old, and her brother has his own problems. All she needs is some help."

Sesshoumaru considered what he'd just heard. He had wondered, but hadn't paid attention.

He should have guessed that this wasn't a well off shrine. There was a faint air of neglect about it. He'd put it down to the lack of cleaning, but now he knew the reason. If it cost this little to own a spice cupboard, no wonder he'd been off. He couldn't even judge things properly now. Not through faulty guessing, but because it was more clear than ever how much had changed, how different it was. He simply couldn't assume he knew anything…

This was rather disheartening. The whole world was mad…or he was…

"Anyway …I just…wanted to ask you to stop being such a pain." He didn't dare suggest to the cold gold eyes in front of him that he help clean, as he'd originally thought. Hojo had reached the limits of bravery when it came to that.

Such a pain? He was not being a pain. He knew he was imposing on the family, but it was something no one could avoid. He had to live somewhere till he could go home, and there were very few choices open.

Hojo gulped, and took a step away from the silent Sesshoumaru. "I just…wanted to say that." He turned and walked to the door, deliberately slowly. His knees felt weak. He admired Kagome all the more for daring to stand up to this guy at all, much less when he had a sword…

He paused at the door. "Glad you feel better, after Monday…that was…interesting…" He turned and left, heading back to the kitchen and the semblance of non danger.

Sesshoumaru watched him go without a word. Hojo hadn't said too much, but he'd given him quite a bit to think on.

He hadn't known the shrine was struggling. It seemed odd to think of such a place on the edge of financial ruin. Most of the shrines he'd known were looked after financially, and well kept up. People would support them in times of need, and they were well respected. Was it not still so?

In his experience, some villages sent their young ones to the shrine to keep it for the priests. There wasn't even a need to hire someone. Youkai beliefs were different from human held ones, but they had their similarities.

Now that he really thought about it, this place was unusually quiet. There had been hardly any people all week. The two old ladies who'd been there earlier, and a young couple he'd heard yesterday.

Hardly the number of people he should have seen about in a village…city… this size. There should have been a steady stream of people. Hojo was right. This shrine had fallen on hard times. And he hadn't noticed.

His presence wasn't really helping at all. Not only was he in need of teaching, and therefore time, but he was costing them money. It started with the food and went on down the list to the clothes on his back. They had done a lot for him, and he hadn't even known what effort they were making on his behalf. It made no real difference to him, but it meant he was in even more in debt than he'd thought.

A debt he had to repay.

Still. They _had_ chosen to help him. Perhaps more out of need than any real sense of duty. But he didn't think it was quite the case. They did far more for him than they had to. It made him feel slightly helpless. They kept doing all these things…and he didn't want them to, didn't need them to. They were treating him as something to be _protected_, of all things…and he was far more used to being the protector.

It grated horribly, having to abide by that. They should stop doing so. They didn't need to! He was a complete stranger to all but one member of the family, and Kagome had only seen him in battle…when he was on the other side, opposing her. She had taken him in despite numerous attempts to kill her on his part. Either she was mad, incredibly lacking in a sense of self preservation or far too trusting.

Of course, he hadn't betrayed that trust. Perhaps she wasn't quite so naive as he thought…

Still, it made no sense that they should take him in, unless it was to stop him from getting into trouble. He was always feared when it came to humans. They had never, ever trusted him. He'd been feared, too feared even for them to attack openly.

Except for Rin. She alone had chosen to stay with him because of himself, and not because of what he could give her…

If that was the case, and they thought he'd be trouble, surely there would have been more of an effort to keep him inside the house indefinitely. He owed them. He was, unhappily, buried in debt. And he did not like being buried in _any_ way. He'd known he'd been obligated to them before, but he hadn't known how _much_…

He at least owed them a few answers, and an attempt to get along. It need not be for long, just until he got home, but until then he could try to keep the peace. It was wrong of him not to bend to some of the rules of this odd place.

There were some things he would not do, and there were some he could possibly bring himself to do. Attempting to make life easier in this house would not only help him, but help others. It was easy enough to do. He always repaid what he owed, and he owed this family. They had said nothing, and there was no mention of this in words, but the feeling of debt was there true enough. He had never left a debt unpaid in his life, and he was not going to start now.

First thing he could do, would be to let Kagome calm down, and then tell her his answer. He had thought of harming her grandpa, but hadn't done so yet. He'd have to make a little more effort, now. That would be the best way to discharge a portion of debt, but only a small amount.

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Kagome waited downstairs, and looked up as Hojo came down. "And?"

"You were right. He's fine." There had been no harm in checking. He'd been terrified last Monday, though, and he had wanted to come back here just to make sure that he hadn't screwed up. That would have been awful…he'd been feeling physically ill, worrying.

He wasn't a doctor by any stretch of the imagination…(he still had at least 11 years more of school!) but at least he'd managed to pull this one off. Or maybe he was just very, very lucky…but either way, everything had worked.

"He's fine, but I want you to be mindful of yourself too…I want you to be careful, Kagome. You might not have been the invalid I thought you were, but you're not invincible either."

Kagome smiled tiredly at him. "Silly…I know that. I'm not invincible…almost, but not quite…" She laughed. "I'll be fine. It's just that this week's been so turned around…"

Hojo had his doubts about that, but he kept them to himself. "Oh…that reminds me…Yuka and Eri wanted to know if you could drop by the mall with them this weekend, since you skipped out last time." He grinned. "Probably because you got a youkai dumped in your lap, I'm guessing."

He almost envied Sesshoumaru for a moment. He not only got to have Kagome worried about him, but he got to share a house with her. Not that Sesshoumaru appreciated it any more than Inuyasha had…

"Yeah. I wasn't going to leave him on his own. Thanks for telling me." She would probably have to go this weekend, or they would get curious. Plus, think up a story about why she'd canceled on them last week. Great, yet more lies…

"No problem. Take care, you hear? And tell me if you need anything…" He doubted Kagome would tell him, but he wanted to make the offer anyway.

"I…will…" She couldn't ask him to do that. He had his own problems. He was always studying, always busy. She wouldn't add to the load of post-secondary woes. Kagome saw him out the door, and then picked up the phone to talk to Eri. She would go with them this week, and maybe just say something had come up at work last Saturday. It had happened before. Kagome sighed, and retreated to her own private space after she'd finished with the cleaning, stubbornly ignoring Sesshoumaru the whole time.

The evening, apart from her phone conversation, passed in silence.

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_Yay! Another chapter uploaded. I actually had time to write a bit more this week, on the future chapters...so hopefuly when I run out of the already written/beta-checked (thanks, Trisak_)_ work, I'll have almost finished..._

_And…wow. O.o Most reviews I've ever had for last chapter. Hee! Many thanks to all of you who reviewed last chapter – I know I don't always reply to the reviews, especially to the anonymous ones, but I do appreciate them all the same:D So, thanks a ton!_


	14. ch13:Cooking with Souta

**: Cooking with Souta :**

Kagome sighed, and looked at the familiar walls of the cultural center for what would be the last time in a long while. She had spent her afternoon first learning more about Shinto marriage ceremonies (not _precisely_ useful) and then, after, had spent an hour and a half in the Karate dojo out back. Yay for sparring; her muscles were now limp as wrung rags.

She had told her teachers that she was leaving, and they had been sorry to see her go. But she had decided. There were other ways for her to get the information and training she needed, once she was home. Some of it she'd get from Kaede, and some of it, like first aid knowledge and nursing, she'd picked up there. The money was also an important factor, and truth be told, she'd thought about giving up her Friday classes on and off for a while.

Now that Sesshoumaru was here, she was sure she would get home soon. There had to be a way to get though, if he helped…once she talked to him, at least. Nothing would happen if they didn't even try to converse. She had avoided him all last night, and had insured she'd be busy all of Saturday. Morning would be shopping, and the afternoon would be finishing the courtyard cleaning.

She had felt slightly guilty for leaving the work that needed doing, but she had promised herself a break last week, and since it hadn't happened, she wanted one this week. Somewhat selfish of her, but she'd been so busy running around after people lately, and working, that she was getting worn out. Hojo had been right about that. There was more to life than work.

Work was hard, especially with the shrine thrown in there. She would have more time to try and catch up on the shrine's workload without Friday classes to worry about, and more money. It was the right decision…

Ah well…sooner or later, she'd have had to quit anyway, because she still planned on returning to the past., and staying for a long, long time. This was just sooner than she'd counted on.

She took one last look back before getting on the bus, and then turned her attention to the problems waiting for her at home. Sesshoumaru had stayed out of her way last night, or perhaps it was just her trying to avoid him. She might not like it, but sooner or later she'd have to try talking to him again, and ask about his intentions when it came to her family.

If he had thought about harming them, she had to know. She knew all too well what he could be like, though he'd been surprisingly…good, so far. Besides that, she might really need to have his help in getting home. If she hadn't gotten through at this point, on her own, she probably _would_ need help to get through. Or more knowledge, which he might be able to give her. He claimed he knew nothing about how miko powers worked, but just perhaps…

With even that much, perhaps she could puzzle some things out. Like that illusion spell…Kagome bit her lip, and grinned. It hadn't worked all that well at first, but eventually, she'd gotten it right.

So, she would go home, and try to ask him about what had gone on between him and grampa again. She had to know that before she could decide anything else. She had to remember that, even if he had thought about hurting the old man, there was a difference between _thought_, and _deed_. Whatever had happened, her grampa had been well enough to complain about it vigorously afterwards.

She wasn't sure what grampa had been up to yesterday, since so far it hadn't appeared. He was still working on it. But she was sure he would try something, sooner or later. Maybe even tonight.

She watched as her street corner appeared, and pulled the cord. She didn't really like taking the bus, but it was the best way to get around. The museum was too far to walk or ride her bike to without getting up an hour earlier (an option she was _not_ willing to think about. She was already up at 5:30 or 6 most days, and home late…). There was a vehicle, and she had her license, but she hardly ever drove. Her mom usually took the car.

Kagome got off the old bus, and coughed as a cloud of gas erupted from the engine. That was one thing she didn't miss about Tokyo in the least; the air pollution. She had always been amazed at how clean and…untouched…the feudal era was. It was a whole different world, almost. She grinned. It _was_ a whole other world…

And poor Sesshoumaru had been taken from that era, and dumped into hers. She almost pitied him, in a way. He was stuck here, and was probably trying to make the best of it. She knew he would object to any sympathy though, so she'd never mentioned it. But still…he seemed...lost, almost. Something had changed in him since he was brought here. And she didn't know what, or why.

Kagome lowly started climbing the mountain of steps in front of her house, privately wondering what idiot had designed the steps in the first place. They made getting around so much harder than it had to be. Every day, she had to go down these oversized stairs…and then go back _up_…

She opened the door slowly, and closed it. She leaned back against the wood with a sigh, and then took off her coat. Today had been too long. It was almost dinner time, by now, since she'd gone straight from the museum to the cultural center.

She set her bag by the stairs, and then poked her head in the kitchen. Souta beamed at her from behind an enormous pot of ramen.

"Hi! How was today?"

"Oh…not too bad…I'm a little tired, after all that karate. I might even be close to learning how to punch properly by now…" She'd wait till her mom got home to mention she'd quit. She was working late tonight, which was why Souta was cooking. He got to cook every Friday, and he enjoyed it, too…even if he was a horrible cook.

Honestly, the only thing he could make with any hope of success was ramen! The first few times he'd tried cooking, he'd attempted making oden for her. She'd appreciated the thought, really, but it had been a disaster. He'd put the food to cook at far too high a heat, and had forgotten the seasoning altogether. Amazingly, he hadn't noticed this until he'd started serving it.

They had survived the experience…barely…and had very, _very_ politely suggested that he try cooking instant ramen next time, since it was unlikely he would be able to damage it. Much.

"That's awesome! Maybe one day I'll try Karate…" Souta yelped as the steel pot began to hiss evilly at him, and hurriedly turned the heat down.

Kagome laughed, too quiet for him to hear. For someone so talented at games, he was surprisingly incompetent when it came to stoves. She went back to get her bag, and put it by the futon in the living room.

She put her hands on her hips, and looked at the messily made bed critically. That was the other thing she needed to do. Get the second storage room upstairs cleared out enough that she could sleep in there. She'd meant to do it before, but she'd gotten sidetracked. Perhaps she'd have time this Saturday to fix that. It was getting irritating, being in the living room.

That brought her to the reason why she was in the living room: Sesshoumaru was in her room. And she needed to talk to him. Kagome's anger with him from yesterday had finally gone out, but she still needed to know what had happened between him and grampa.

Kagome headed for the stairs, and passed her grandpa on the way up. He had a small container clutched to his chest, and looked furtively at her as she passed. She shook her head as he disappeared into the kitchen. He was up to something again…

She sighed. She'd find out about it soon enough, no doubt.

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Sesshoumaru squinted at the computer screen again. So far today, nothing serious had happened in the way of pop-ups. Even so, he'd gotten a fair amount of junk about casinos and other futuristic gambling dens. He'd gotten rid of them, but they were still irritating. And, he had to figure out what the 'Björk' CD he'd found was about at some point…when Kagome got home. Sesshoumaru sighed. When she arrived he had to talk with her.

There had been nothing so far on Damia, the Purists, or on Mesau, though he'd expected little to no information about the miko. She kept to the shadows. He had hoped he could also find something on the denizens of the castle, but most of what he'd found was human misconceptions. He knew there probably wasn't going to be any information, but there was always a chance…

What had his other generals done? What about Jaken? He knew the toad imp would remain loyal. There was no question of that. But would he manage to survive despite that, or would he be put to the sword?

Sesshoumaru had looked at many, many pages and pictures. Nothing had information he could connect to the traitor at all. Nothing on his home. Nothing about the youkai Purists, though plenty on various human ones. And hardly anything on miko at all…

Of course, this was assuming Damia went by the same name after all this time, and that she wasn't using a charm like the one he now owned to look mortal. If he had gone past a picture of her wearing such a disguise, he would never know. Mesau was certainly capable of making illusions, if she happened to think of doing so.

Even more disheartening was the thought they might be dead, and that all this was for nothing. He really hoped that was not the case. He really, _really_ wanted to be the one to kill her.

Naraku's death had been a tiny irritant. He had wanted to be the one who did away with him, and he had been mildly disappointed when Kagome had told him he was dead. However, if he heard Damia was dead…it would be **very** disappointing. He'd spent far too long planning out her execution to let her get away that easily.

There wasn't much he could do if she was dead, though…which was even _more_ irritating…

He heard footsteps on the stairs, and sat straighter on his chair. Kagome must be home, and he was willing to bet she wanted to talk to him. She had ignored him completely last night, and he'd been a little worried she'd hold a grudge. He sat a little straighter, waiting for her. He'd talk this time. He might not have much in the way of people skills, but Sesshoumaru was not stupid. He owed her.

He heard her pause at the room he slept in, and then continue slowly on down the hall when she found he wasn't there. The door opened, and he listened as she tapped her fingers on the doorframe.

"On the computer again, I see." Kagome invited herself in, and looked at the screen. "Found anything?" What was he looking for? She wanted desperately to ask, but didn't think this was the best time.

He closed his eyes. The Internet was more trouble than it was worth. "No." he turned around in the chair slightly, so he could see her outlined beautifully against the hall lights from the corner of his eyes. What was she here for? He thought he could guess.

"You remember what I wanted yesterday, don't you?" She knew she was no good when it came to apologizing or talking again after a fight had happened. And this time, she didn't need to apologize. Maybe she had been a little harsh, but when it came to her family's safety, harshness was warranted. She was _not_ about to apologize for protecting them.

"Yes." He was just as quiet, not wanting to say the wrong thing again. He couldn't afford to. And, he found, didn't want to say the wrong thing in front of Kagome.

"Well…I still want to know about what happened. I need to know." The important thing was that he hadn't acted on any malicious thoughts, and that she found out the truth.

"I did consider killing him." True enough. He wasn't going to say why. He was definitely not going to think about that long ago day in the meadow or how her grampa's futile waving of paper had brought him back to that place and time. She knew nothing about Damia, except that he was searching for her. She didn't even know why he was looking for her, and he wasn't going to tell her at this point. That was just a little too personal.

So he _had_ thought about killing him! Anger flared briefly, but Kagome stopped herself from loosing it. "But you didn't. And you won't. And if you ever hurt him…well, you didn't. But I give you warning now, that even if he does keep running around with scrolls, you're not going to hurt him. I won't let you."

Now she knew why he hadn't said anything yesterday. That would be the worst thing grampa could hear. And he must not want to lie about it, or he'd have just said that no, 'everything was fine and he would never, ever do such a horrible thing', and lied through his teeth. He wouldn't, though. He was pretty predictable that way…

The important thing was that he hadn't done it. There wasn't much she could do, except to warn him. She couldn't get him away from grandpa, since Sesshoumaru was living here and would continue to do so. Kagome was determined to trust the feeling she had, the one that told her her family was safe.

But if he ever did more than think about hurting her family…feeling or no feeling…

"So I see. Rest assured, they are safe. Even if the old man attempts something like that again, I will not do anything. I am warned, now." He might as well say that. It was the truth. He would be on guard for moments of weakness like that in the future again, so that he would not lose control. Kagome deserved his spoken promise, not just implied agreement.

He had never wanted to hurt this family. Not only would that kill any chance of getting home with Kagome's cooperation, but it went against what he had been taught. Killing your host was dishonorable, and to kill or injure a family he owed a debt like _this_ to…unthinkable. He could not hurt them, even if he had hated them. And he didn't hate them. Sometimes, he even enjoyed their company a little, though this was a thought he kept firmly locked in one of the darker parts of his mind.

Well, that was…reassuring. Sort of, at least. He wasn't going to do anything, even if he'd thought about it at one point. Sesshoumaru would keep his word. "I…see. Thank you for telling me that." She didn't really like what she'd found out, but at least she knew now. Sesshoumaru turned back towards the computer screen.

Kagome paused at the door, and hovered there, unsure. What did you say to someone who had just admitted he had seriously thought about killing your family? She hadn't any idea. Kagome paused, then decided to say nothing. Perhaps it was better she keep quiet than say something stupid.

She watched Sesshoumaru mouse around the screen with agonizing slowness, and then left. She didn't want to watch him fumble his way around the net all night. If he needed help, he'd ask…maybe.

There _was_ that whole thing about him being a stubborn, conceited jerk who thought he was too good to ask for help, after all…

Kagome went back to the dimly lit living room, and surveyed the pile of sheets, twisted clothing, and the various small objects that were covering the futon she was using for the time being.

Perhaps she ought to clean it off, instead of shoving aside all the junk and crawling in to sleep at the end of the day. She actually had time, for once.

Kagome sat down and started organizing, waiting for dinner to be finished.

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Souta frowned at the boiling pot. The ramen had been…uncooperative. It didn't do what it was supposed to at all! Or at least, he didn't think it was supposed to smell like sulfur…he was pretty sure that it wasn't supposed to, anyway… He hoped it didn't stick to the pot, like last time. It had taken him ages to clean all the dishes!

He glanced at the second pot of rice, and sighed in relief. At least one thing was working out for him tonight, though that was probably more luck than anything else. He looked up as the slow, light steps of his grampa entered the kitchen.

Souta's face lit up. Grandpa knew how to cook rice and ramen! He could save…_maybe_ save…the supper they were having!

"Grandpa! You have the best timing ever…could you watch these please?" Souta beamed, shoved an apron at grampa, and ran off before he could be called back.

He felt a little guilty about that, but it had to be done if he wanted to survive eating his own cooking again…

Grampa started at the checkered apron, and blinked. He had thought it would take forever to get Souta out of the kitchen, and instead he'd run out of his own accord the minute he appeared!

A small stroke of luck. Perhaps it was an omen of success. Whatever it was, he wasn't arguing.

Grampa shuffled over to the stove, and wrinkled his nose at the blast of rotten eggs lurking in the first pot.

No wonder Souta had been panicky. What had he _done_ to get this mess? Grandpa shook his head, and moved onto the rice pot, which had been his goal all along.

He glanced back at the doorway, but no one was in sight. Seeing that, he put the small container of rice scrolls on the counter and carefully added them to the water.

The rice settled to the bottom and winked up at him through the bubbles, and grampa smiled. If this didn't work, he didn't know what he'd do…but this would surely do it! There was no way that a youkai could survive actually **eating** exorcizing wards, right?

Humming quietly to himself, grampa replaced the lid and turned back to the first, rancid smelling mess. Souta really **was** hopeless…

And somehow, he'd have to save dinner. Grampa rolled up his sleeves as though preparing for battle, and set himself to the all important task of saving the ramen and steamed vegetables.

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Sesshoumaru's nose twitched slightly as Souta came back from the kitchen, trailing clouds of air reminiscent of ruined food. He'd no idea what the human had been cooking, but it smelled…odd. He'd been wondering what it was ever since the stink first drifted in from the kitchen. It had almost smelt like ramen, at first. He had no idea what it was supposed to be now.

He listened absently as Souta arranged himself on the bed and pulled out a small electronic screen. He ignored that, and kept on plowing though the thousands of pages that had matched his description.

Idiot computer…if it had been an actual _person_… Computers were no substitute for just asking a competent spy for information…threats didn't work nearly as well on a blinking grey box…

Distantly, the sound of the front door opening and Sakura Higurashi coming in for the night intruded. He ignored it, except that it meant dinner would probably be soon.

His fingers tapped the mouse. He wished he could take out the frustration he felt by melting the contraption, and then rest of the computer, in one good dose of acidic poison, but he didn't. The computer was irritating, but it was the only way to search for Damia for now. He could try walking around town at some point, particularly now that he had that charm, but it would only be aimless wandering.

Of course, he'd done a lot of that before and it had worked not too badly, considering. Perhaps he ought to try that in a few days if the computer turned up nothing… He'd had enough of it for one night, at any rate.

Dinner ought to be soon as well, which was most welcome. He was still hungry from his long years as stone, even after a week of food and 'freedom'. Sesshoumaru pushed the odd swiveling chair back, and stood up just as grampa's voice called out 'dinner' from the stairs.

He almost smiled. Perfect timing on his part. He had no idea what dinner would be, since the smells were…interesting, to say the least. But it couldn't be any worse than the spicy food Sakura Higurashi had prepared.

Right?

Souta jumped up after hitting the pause button, and ran downstairs. So grampa had saved him after all! He raced ahead of Sesshoumaru and got to the table just as Kagome wandered in from the living room.

"Food! Thanks Grampa!" Souta grinned broadly and whizzed around the kitchen to get plates. His mom smiled at him from the table, and laughed at his enthusiasm.

Souta proudly brought the cooking pots and the tea to the table, and lifted the lids with a flourish.

Inside was revealed a pile of fairly normal looking ramen, though it smelled…odd….and beside it, a pot of what appeared to be rice.

Sesshoumaru winced privately as the weak smell of diluted ink reached his nose. What had the human been doing? **Nobody** put ink in food…Besides; it was making him feel slightly nauseous.

Kagome raised an eyebrow. "I didn't know we were having wild rice." Wild rice? Where had the money come from…?

Grampa started at what had become of his white rice scrolls in shock. It wasn't supposed to dissolve and turn it all black! It was supposed to stay written on the rice and get _eaten_! He scowled at the rice. Darn darn darn darn….

Souta looked down at the pot, and stared. "But…it was white rice…." He winced and groaned. "Aw…I just can't do anything right…."

"You can too, Souta. Cooking might not be your forte, but I'll bet it tastes fine." Mrs. Higurashi smiled, and served herself rice, bravely taking a bite.

She blinked, and stared at the rice. _'It tastes like ink.'_ Weird…

Souta frowned at the rice pot, and tried some himself. "Ink!" He looked carefully, and picked up a grain of rice. "I **know** I didn't put ink in. Even **I'm** not that bad a cook." He squinted at the rice, and blinked as a few of the darker patches resolved into a shape.

"You know, it almost looks like there's writing on them?" Souta said thoughtfully, still not sure how the ink had gotten there. He shrugged, and kept eating. Ink or not, he was way too hungry to pass up food. Even food _he'd_ cooked…

Kagome immediately looked at her grampa. Somehow, this sounded suspicious… "You wouldn't happen to know anything about this, would you?" She smiled charmingly. This had better not be some scheme of his designed to remove the 'pest' in the shrine...

"Ah…erm….no?" Grampa smiled beatifically.

Kagome frowned at him, not fooled in the least. "Grampa! What did I ask you to do?"

Souta stared at his grampa accusingly. His cooking was already bad enough without grampa putting ink in it!

"You said not to exorcise the pes-…Sesshoumaru." Grampa sighed. He'd been so **close**, too…

Sesshoumaru blinked as he heard the old man stutter. Had he been about to call him a pest? Senile old fool. He was not a pest, _or_ vermin to be exterminated! Besides, why had the old man even attempted to write on rice in _water soluble_ ink? That was just _stupidity_. It was getting on his nerves.

"Right. Sesshoumaru said he wasn't going to hurt you, and he takes promises seriously. You don't have to worry, Grampa…so please, please stop!"

Grampa looked at Sesshoumaru from the end of the table. "Is that true?" Grandpa glared suspiciously, and raised an eyebrow in a long, drooping arc.

Sesshoumaru looked back at him blankly. "Of course. I do not make promises lightly."

Grampa sat back in his chair, annoyed. Now he hadn't even got the excuse that he might be murdered in his bed as justification for trying to exorcise the pesky demon….

Today was just not his day.

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Kagome sighed as she got dressed for bed, eyes starting to feel heavy with sleep. Tomorrow was Saturday. Holiday. Shopping day. Fun day.

Also, explaining to Yuka, Eri and Ayumi where she had been last week day…

She wandered out of the bathroom downstairs, and then headed back up to grab her hairbrush. She really needed to move all her now-organized-stuff into the storage room. She could do that after she got home tomorrow, maybe. Her mom had moved the old crib out, so there was room for her now.

She sighed, and looked at the print of bamboo on the wall. It was a pity Sesshoumaru couldn't use break the barrier. He could go home and she'd never have to explain him to anyone again.

Wait a minute…couldn't Tetsusaiga break barriers?

Her eyes widened, and she laughed. It was so simple! All she had to do was to try and make Tetsusaiga work for Sesshoumaru! She knew just how to do it too! She could get him to promise to break the barrier or something, and then give him the sword. He'd be using it on behalf of a human, so it should work!

Of course…if he was able to use it, then she might not be able to keep it.

The last thing Inuyasha gave to her aside from his haori was the sword. She wasn't terribly keen on loaning it to Sesshoumaru. Knowing him, he'd probably try to borrow it on a more…permanent… basis. She couldn't believe he'd given up on the sword simply because Inuyasha was no longer here. There just wasn't much point to him taking it at this point. It was in her room with him, for starters. And where would he go?

She'd have to give it to Sesshoumaru. Maybe. The sword only worked when used on behalf of a human, so perhaps Sesshoumaru would be unable to use it without her even after this. One never knew. He might even give it back, though that was as likely to happen as…as…as a really big number. Her mind refused to give her that number at the moment, because she was tired.

She laughed again, and ran inside smiling. Even if it worked out so that he got the sword, she would go home! That was worth it. She'd figure the rest out later…

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Sesshoumaru looked away from the darkening window in Souta's room as Kagome burst in, flushed and smiling. He raised an eyebrow quizzically. What had happened in the space between now and dinner to make her so excited? It couldn't have anything to do with the inky rice, could it?

"Oh…I just thought of something else we could try to break though! I could tell you how Tetsusaiga works and you could try and get though with the sword! You always seemed to want it."

A human, tell him how to use father's sword? The idea was ridiculous…but…leave no option un-explored. Especially when the stakes were so high. If any human could help, it would be Kagome. He wanted to go back home more than ever. Once there, he knew exactly where to find Damia, and how to go about waging his solitary war on her. What had she done to the West? If nothing else, handing it to the Purists on a gilded tray seemed likely…

Kagome was right about Tetsusaiga being a good possibility of getting back, and if she knew how to make it work, he would listen. Perhaps Inuyasha had shared some secret of its inner workings with her.

He would be able to go back to something vaguely familiar and perhaps…perhaps he could try and pick up where he had left off. He could go about the business of ruling, once Damia was deposed…or not. He wasn't sure he could beat her at this point. He knew nothing of what had happened in his absence. She might be dead for all he knew.

He wondered why he suddenly felt cold, and even more alone than he had before. Shouldn't he be somewhat happy about this little piece of news? At the very, very least, he'd be free of this house and the rules of this world. It might be fine to visit…but_ only_ to visit. He could hardly imagine living this long, and being stuck in the future. Even if this was a rather friendly family…

Perhaps he'd be slain in the past and not live this long after all. Interesting idea…

But first, he needed to get home. Did Kagome know something about his father's fang he did not?

"You know how it works?"

"Yup. I showed Inuyasha how to use it too." Inuyasha had been so stubborn…and his brother was a lot like him in some ways. Kagome grinned. They both had a nose for trouble…

Interesting. So his brother had not figured out how to use the sword on his own, had he? This little girl knew what both of Inutashio's sons had not. How did she know? Was it mere chance, or was this more of her sketchy miko knowledge at work? "Tell me."

"It was a sword made to protect humans. It won't kill them except in defense of the greater good, if ever. We never tested that part. If you were doing a service to a human, or protecting one, the sword would probably work for you. But that's how it worked for Inuyasha. I made it work for him."

So…It was not only protected with a barrier, but the sword only worked when in the hands of one favorably inclined towards humans. No wonder it had never liked him. He didn't precisely hate humans…but he disliked the majority intensely. They always seemed so….hypocritical.

Rin had been the only one he had ever been attached to at all…come to think of it, she had been the one person he had not minded being around in his later years. He easily could count on his one hand how many people he had been close to in his life.

Even if he managed to use the sword that way, what of the barrier that kept him specifically from holding onto it? The sword did not like him. It had been made for Inuyasha, much as he hated to admit it, and did not take kindly to another owner.

"The idea has merit. However, there is a barrier around it. I cannot hold it."

"So there _is_ a barrier? Crap, not another one…I hate barriers!" Maybe she could break the barrier so Sesshoumaru could at least try to use the sword? This was a youkai sword, so maybe she would have better luck with this ward. It was a thought. Of course, she might just end up purifying the sword into uselessness for an indeterminable amount of time…

Maybe she could just give him the sword, and see if Sesshoumaru wanting to break the barrier for her would be enough…that was **much** simpler…

"How about we try giving you the sword, and then you say your going to break the barrier for me? Otherwise, it won't be in service to a human. So it won't work." That was enough incentive to try, wasn't it? She had to hope he'd swallow his enormous ego enough to at least give it a go…

Sesshoumaru got up, and waited as Kagome ran to get Tetsusaiga. Technically, he would be breaking the barrier for her, which would let the fang work. He could deal with that. He would be careful in stating his 'promise' though. There was no sense in making more of a bargain than intended.

And after he'd destroyed the barrier, he could use the well himself. He could live with the indignity of human help if it gave him what he so badly wanted. It had to be done, one way or another. What was one more thing, when he'd been dependent on her while sick, and had eaten from her family's table?

Kagome dug down through the clothes that had been shoved out of the way, and picked up the haori wrapped sword, sliding the red cloth of as she did so. She held Tetsusaiga in her hands for a second, memorizing what she already knew. The satin feel of the sheath, worn from use, and the ragged strips of cloth around the hilt. The fabric looked worn and ready to fall apart at a touch, but looks were deceiving. She knew that the sturdy binding gave an excellent grip, and that the battered blade was much more than it seemed.

Just like Inuyasha. A little scruffy, perhaps, but beneath that, so much more…

Kagome smiled at Tetsusaiga. _'I know you probably didn't want Sesshoumaru within a mile of this, but I have to…I'm coming home soon, I hope. I know you'd have understood…'_ the edges of her lips quirked, and she stood up abruptly.

Kagome walked quickly back to Souta's room with the sword in its sheath, and met Sesshoumaru in the hall. She shrugged and went back into her own room, following him, and then held the sword out to him hilt first "Promise to break the barrier?" Kagome listened carefully. If this worked…she held her breath as Sesshoumaru looked at the sword and reached out slowly.

"Yes. On my honor." Sesshoumaru reached out a little further, and grasped the sword's tattered hilt. He would not fail to keep such a promise. Even though it was made for her, it was really a promise to himself.

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_Woooo….cliffhanger. And, unfortunately, news that I might not be able to update fro two weeks this time – two portfolios due in less than 10 days, one for Design, one for Art. So much work… much more than sciences. At least they have decent schedules; not 'get up at 5, be there by 7, stay till 9 for far too many days a week, plus weekends…' bah. Enough complaining on my part, I think. It's fun, despite everything. But just thought I'd mention why no updates next week. Week after I should be up to it. _:)

_Thank you for all the kind reviews I got last chapter! _:)


	15. ch14:Reject

**:: Reject ::**

(Previous)

Kagome walked quickly back to Souta's room with the sword in its sheath, and met Sesshoumaru in the hall. She shrugged and went back into her own room, following him, and then held the sword out to him hilt first "Promise to break the barrier?" Kagome listened carefully. If this worked…she held her breath as Sesshoumaru looked at the sword and reached out slowly.

"Yes. On my honor." Sesshoumaru reached out a little further, and grasped the sword's tattered hilt. He would not fail to keep such a promise. Even though it was made for her, it was really a promise to himself.

(next ch)

His fingers settled lightly into place around the sword, and he knew a moment's satisfaction. It hadn't…

Pain flared along his arm, flaring out from where his fingers touched the battered sword. They trembled slightly as he tried to force himself to hold on to the hilt, regardless of the ache in his finger bones. He had held on long enough to use it once before, and he could do it again! His claws tightened slightly, trying to hold on hard enough that nothing could make him let go.

Ice crawled inside his skin, so cold it burned. Sesshoumaru clamped down on any noise of surprise he might have made. There had to be a way…there _had_ to be…this wasn't nearly as bad as it had been before, the last time he'd held Tetsusaiga, so perhaps….he was onto something…

Fire grew along his nerves, blossoming along his arm. He was sure that if he looked hard enough he would be able to see it racing along beneath his skin, bubbling like acid. He locked his fingers in place grimly. This was a battle he had to win. But it was so hard…and in the end, what was the point? There would be no using Tetsusaiga. He wasn't about to go running out to the well. He doubted he'd make get even ten paces before he dropped the sword, much less use it.

The pain grew worse, and eventually, he could take it no more. There was no point to holding on any longer.

Sesshoumaru stared at the raw, shiny skin where Tetsusaiga had touched, decorating his palm. "It appears your idea didn't work." He blinked at the singed skin, oddly fascinated.

Kagome watched as he let go after only a few seconds, hand to her mouth as she saw the angry red. Those had to **hurt**. "Oh! I'm so sorry! Your hand…" She'd managed to get him burned…the sword had rejected him again. Scrap the idea of just giving him the sword and hoping it would work…

"Will be healed momentarily. I suggest you think of something else." Or he would think of something else. Clearly, Tetsusaiga still rejected him nearly as strongly as ever. One day though, it would not. One day, he would be able to hold the sword easily in his hand, and use the powers at its disposal with no more trouble than it took to breathe.

"I'm sorry…" Kagome left to put the sword back. "Perhaps next time?" There had to be some way to get Tetsusaiga to cooperate with her. She didn't know that she wanted to risk trying to purify the barrier around the sword hilt, but there had to be some other way around this…

Sesshoumaru didn't answer. He sat still amidst the messy environs of Kagome's room to think about the sword in peace, while she headed off to sleep.

He didn't sleep as much as humans. However, since Souta would be in his room for the night soon, and the rest of the house would be in quiet darkness, it was best he stay in 'his' own room.

He sat back slowly with a sigh, frowning slightly as his palm throbbed, already beginning to heal. The skin itched, and he resisted an impulse to scratch. That would only make it worse.

The sword was _still_ his brother's, even when Inuyasha was dead! The better sword, given to Inuyasha…just as everything would have gone to him eventually, had father lived. All father's attention had been for Izaio, Inuyasha's mother. Nothing left over for him. No possessions, no thoughts. Nothing.

Sesshoumaru wondered if he'd have been forgotten completely if his father had lived long enough to form a tighter family bond with Inuyasha and his mother, if Inuyasha might have become his heir. It was possible; his father had been quite open about such things.

Father had worried more about his unborn child while Izayo was pregnant than whether Sesshoumaru died in battle. He didn't care about him. Not him, the first born. Nor his first mate, hand given reluctantly in an arranged match. Sesshoumaru was sure that the only reason he'd been given Tenseiga at all was because father had remembered he had a heir older than Inuyasha who might want a sword. And even then, it wasn't something he could use much as a youkai, just to spite him… Sesshoumaru knew his own sword was powerful in its way, but there was so little call for it, in the hands of an ice lord that it was useless…

There would be a way around the problems Tetsusaiga represented, or the ward in the well. He would get through. One way or another…

By now he was completely recovered, both from the long imprisonment and his encounter with chocolate. His palm would be healed within the hour. Come tomorrow, he'd be completely whole. It felt good to return to a more normal routine, one of early rising and late nights or needing no sleep at all. Something familiar in this dark sea of change. He clung to it as tightly as he'd have held to a lifeline in a storm.

He barely registered as Kagome left, and lay back on the bed to think. There **had** to be some way around this. There had to be. He felt like there was a glass ceiling holding him here, a crystal cage. He could see out, but couldn't get through.

Everything he'd tried had given him nothing! The fruitless search on the Internet, and the frustrating lack of knowledge even of a toaster's inner workings. Bloody, stupid humans and their infernal technology. He had no idea what half the things he saw were, or how they worked. He didn't know what to do, but it was plain he couldn't just sit here, suffocating in the sea of unfamiliar sights and smells. He just didn't know what he could do, and it was driving him mad.

He didn't even know what had happened, back home! All he could guess was that Damia had seized power. Had the rest of his generals followed her, or had they resisted? Had others died for his sake? Jaken, family, had the other lords of the North, East, and South….what of them? What had Damia done to the web of intrigue and dysfunctional politics that somehow held the balance of power in place?

He looked at the Fang resting quietly in the closet, and thought about everything it stood for. He had always wanted that sword, hoping that somehow, it would make him mean something to his father's ghost.

The tip of his tail started twitching nervously, and he didn't check himself. He was feeling agitated enough not to mind that he was showing the world how troubled he was. He shrugged into the sheets, sitting back against the pillows easily and snorted softly. Foolish. No one was watching him now, no one was waiting for the slightest sign of weakness. He wasn't a Taiyoukai anymore. No need to hide what he was feeling, or act like the lord he had been.

Sesshouamru stilled abruptly, forcing himself not to move.

Never, ever good enough, was he? Where had he gone wrong? When had he stopped caring, stopped living? He knew very well he'd had no purpose even before he'd been entombed. Before Damia had caught him in her pet miko's spell, he'd been drifting. Rin had been the only thing he'd felt anything about in a long time. The price of detachment, perhaps.

She had been like him…she had seen her family lost to her, though far more brutally and abruptly than he had, in some ways. She had felt the punishment of the village. Perhaps part of why he'd saved her was to let her grow up without that. Human she had been, but he had wanted to prevent another person living…if one could call it that…like him.

He was a drifter. Wandering Japan, occasionally going 'home'. Only…not now. He was so weak he'd been held back by a mere humans barrier.

Sesshoumaru snorted. If Damia's pet miko had held him frozen for centuries, why was he surprised that another held similar power over him? Kagome was, or would be, if she were ever trained, a very powerful miko, one to rival even Midoriko's power, the strongest of her times.

He would try again. He wouldn't give up yet. There had to be a way, even if it took time. Nobody could cover every possibility. There were always loopholes, options. You just had to find them.

This was doing nothing. Sesshoumaru stood up, and walked to the closet. He looked down at the sword, and bent to pick it up again without thinking.

Light flared, and pain spread across his palm, seeping over skin still raw from a few minutes ago. He hung on grimly, locking his fingers in place and wrestling with himself. He had to get back, somehow. He had to master the fang to do that. He wanted this too much to let go now…his fingers spasmed, and he was forced to drop the hilt, overcome.

Defeated… Father still favored his younger son, dead though the half breed was. Sesshoumaru straightened, and lay down again.

Failure.

He did not want to be a failure. He _refused_ to become one.

He wanted to do something, a familiar action. Practice the sword forms, or scout. Mostly, he just wanted to go back _home_. Damia would be waiting. He breathed deeply, taking in the novel scents from the city beyond his window.

He turned his thoughts to what he could do when things were once again the way they should be. It would be exactly the same as it had been before Rin came. He would wander around, perhaps with Jaken, perhaps not. Perhaps he would return to his home and stay in one spot for a few years between wandering. At least, until the future of 450 years from now…then…arrived.

It seemed…empty.

Something was missing. It always had been, but he felt it much more keenly now.

But…there was nothing missing. He couldn't think of anything at all…

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Kagome sighed as she got ready for bed. She had been so very sure of herself. _Why_ didn't Tetsusaiga work the way she thought it had? It should have let Sesshoumaru hold onto it. He was doing something for her, a human! But it hadn't. A barrier against him…

In a way, she was perversely glad it hadn't worked. She hadn't wanted to let go of the blade just yet. It was Inuyasha's, and while he hadn't exactly _given_ it to her, she was sure he'd have wanted her to have it.

Sesshoumaru would probably want to take it with him when he left, as eventually he would. She couldn't believe he would pass up the opportunity to take it from her, not when he'd been so determined to take it by any means necessary from Inuyasha. She doubted, if he did try to get it, that she would be able to stop him.

She slid into her pajamas, cotton rubbing softly against her shoulders. The rest of the house had faded into the familiar white noise of night, punctuated by the humming buzz of the city beyond.

The city never slept. Not really. There was always someone awake in it. A party, a late night fling. Loud cars screaming throughout the streets, racing, running from sirens.

And her. Lying awake late at night and wondering.

A sound broke into her morbid thoughts, and it took her a long time to recognize the scraping of knuckles on wood. Someone was knocking.

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Sesshoumaru dimly heard the sounds of the house getting ready for bed, and curled up the way he normally would for sleep. This was irritating him. He could go nowhere with the computer (he was about ready to melt it **and** its twisted Internet into the floor…) and Toukijin had failed him. He knew it was not strong enough and never would be, to break through the miko wards for him.

Tetsusaiga, now…Tetsusaiga was perfect for the job. But he couldn't use it! Maddening….

He clenched his fist, gripping cloth almost hard enough to punch though the soft sheets. He had had it with all these 'modern conveniences' of technology. He could have gotten the job done a lot faster if he'd just gone out **looking** for Damia in the first place.

He stopped. Why didn't he do just that? He hadn't ventured outside so far, possibly because he disliked the stench of the place, (he carefully avoided thinking about Kagome telling him—telling him!—that she didn't want him wandering about. That had **nothing** to do with it…)

No doubt Kagome would insist on going with him. _And_ insist on the necklace. Wench… But…he had promised… And he did not break his word. Ever. Especially not to her.

So. He would go tomorrow.

Sesshoumaru sat up, and decided he would inform Kagome of his decision to go out right now. Why not? Waiting until tomorrow wasn't going to help.

He noiselessly made his way to where she was preparing for sleep, and knocked.

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Kagome pulled open the door, and crossed her arms. Why was Sesshoumaru here?

"I have decided I wish to see the city tomorrow."

Kagome blinked in mild surprise, too tired to really let it sink in. Arrogant, wasn't he? She had had plans for tomorrow, and babysitting him wasn't even **close** to what she'd had in mind.

"Really?"

"Yes." Sesshoumaru wondered briefly why she was tapping her foot and giving him an incredulous look.

"As in 'we hit the shops at the crack of dawn'?" She wasn't doing anything in the afternoon, but he had damn well better not be expecting her to lead him around first thing in the morning. It was going to be bad enough getting up at seven to go shopping with her friends. She didn't need him trying to rouse her at dawn to go dashing all over Tokyo, at who knew what hour, and with gods alone only knew how many 'issues' cropping up along the way.

Sesshoumaru permitted himself a nod, and what could have been extrapolated as the ghost of a smile. Starting at dawn sounded like a fine idea to him. "Yes."

"No. No way. Not going _anywhere_ with you till one in the afternoon."

He blinked. Why did she look so angry? "I do not wish to wait any longer than I already have."

Kagome laughed sarcastically. "You've waited for a good couple of centuries, even if that was in a sealed state and you had no idea **how **long it had been till I woke you up. Why should a few extra hours make a difference? I have a life too, you know! I told you I wasn't your maid, and I meant it. I didn't get to go out last Saturday because of you dropping into my lap. I am going to have a little time for me tomorrow, and you will just have to live with it and wait for me, since I refuse to let you go by yourself."

Now that was a scary thought. Sesshoumaru on his own in Tokyo. She was probably being selfish again. But the opportunity to go and have fun with her friends came only once in a while, and she jealously guarded her free time, these days. She had so little of it. And it was late, and she was cranky.

She also resented the fact Sesshoumaru just…just **assumed** he could run her life without so much as a 'by your leave'! He had just walked into her room (it was already almost midnight!) and told her he wanted to see Tokyo tomorrow. And assumed she would keel over and say 'yes, Sesshoumaru-sama! Of course Sesshoumaru-sama! Can I lick your feet, Sesshoumaru-sama?' No way was _that _happening!

"I won't be home till one. **At least**. Then we'll see." Kagome glared up at him, cursing the fact that he was taller.

He stiffened at her sharp tone of voice, and then forced himself not to show it. She thought he had spent all those years of being sealed unconscious? How very wrong she was. It was true that a normal seal operated in that way, but in his case something had gone wrong. He was supposed to have _died_, for starters…he still didn't know why he was alive…

Of course, she didn't know that, did she? He decided he didn't feel like sharing the information. Too many grey memories.

He wondered what she was doing instead that was so important. He did remember her telling him that she wasn't his servant, and would not be treated as such, and he believed it. She showed him no respect, had never really done so, and would most likely not do so now.

If this was because he had taken time from her last week, then he couldn't, in all honor, try to stop her. At least she had implied that the afternoon might work for his purposes.

Maybe. She might decide she didn't want to do it till the day after…

It didn't make him any less irritated with the wait, though…"Acceptable."

Kagome gritted her teeth, and stuck her tongue out at his retreating back. Arrogant, pompous jerk!

Why was she being punished with him? Why?!

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Sesshoumaru watched the sun rise above the horizon, and stifled a yawn. He hadn't slept last night after his conversation with Kagome.

He vaguely registered the sounds of Kagome dragging herself out of bed, and to breakfast. He considered going down to eat as the alluring scent of cooking food came up through the floor, then thought better of it.

For some reason Kagome had seemed irritated last night, and he doubted she had slept much more than he had. He'd heard her moving around all night.

The difference was that while _he_ hardly needed sleep, _she_ definitely did. Since living here, he had learned that when short of sleep, mortals tended to…snap.

Distantly, the sounds of a car stopping and chattering female voices came towards the shrine. Kagome opened the door, and left with the high pitched voices.

He wondered who they were, then shrugged. It didn't really matter. She'd left for the time being, and he'd just have to wait till she got back.

An eyebrow twitched. Yes. Wait. **He** had to **wait **for** her**.

He decided he'd at least rise to the occasion, and pulled out the pair of jeans she had found for him.

If he was going to do this, he was going to do it _properly_. He wasn't going to fail at pretending to be a mortal. He wasn't going to be a failure at _anything_. He might not like the idea, but he'd do it, and do it flawlessly.

He was Sesshoumaru, and he was not going to be a failure again. Not ever.

So. Jeans. T-shirt. Beads. Where were those funny smelling shoes mortals wore, rather than proper footwear? Souta might have something he could use…

That reasoned out, he got dressed in the modern clothing with some difficulty. He cursed whoever had invented buttons (they were not one-armed-youkai friendly…), and glared at the offensive piece of plastic. Jeans were not made to be put on with one hand. He finally pulled himself together, and glanced in the mirror to make sure he looked like a proper mortal, illusion and all. After checking to see that he did, in fact, look like what he'd observed of the humans around him, Sesshoumaru took the beads off again and wandered in the general direction of downstairs, admiring the prints on the walls as he passed them. Jeans were **not** designed for those with tails.

He toyed with the charmed beads in palm of his hand. So far, the rest of the family was sleeping, so he sat down to wait. He was very good at that.

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Kagome sighed as she pulled away from the house with Eri and Yuka. They had decided that they'd pick her up today just to avoid anything like last week from happening.

Speaking of last week…

"Ya know, Kagome, I don't think you ever said what happened last time we tried to get together. Nothing happened with your grampa, did it? You said he wasn't doing so well…" Yuka turned around in the driver's seat, and smiled brightly at Kagome, concerned and somehow predatory. The temperature in the vehicle began dropping rapidly.

Kagome smiled, and laughed, mind frantically searching for an excuse. "Er…no…he was out of town. He got back this week, and he's doing fine. Mom needed help with something."

Perfect excuse, that. And true. Her mom had needed her to take care of Sesshoumaru because she was the only one who could. Besides, she wasn't about to pawn him off on anyone else to take care of. It was her fault he was here, so she was the one who got to take care of the headaches he brought with him.

Yuka frowned at her, and Kagome silently crossed her fingers, smiled again, and broke out in a cold sweat. Please don't take it farther….

"Really? Oh well. You missed a great sale. I got this new skirt!" Yuka proudly pointed to what she was wearing. "Isn't it just adorable?!"

Kagome looked at the bright pink skirt, and sighed. Yuka didn't seem to realize that it was something Kagome would never wear. Neon pink? Awful…

"So…what are we doing today then? I have to be heading home around one, so…"

"Yeah. I have a party that starts at one, so I have to be heading back around noon too." Eri giggled.

"Ladies…let us go to…" Yuka paused for dramatic effect "The mall!" She pointed out the way, and all three marched off like a miniature army of shopping doom.

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Several stores and a whirlwind of clothes later, the threesome sat on the bench just outside the mall and ate ice-cream. Kagome inspected the chocolate ice cream cone, and had to laugh as she thought of what Sesshoumaru might think if she were to buy him chocolate ice cream. He would probably think she was trying to poison him…

**She** had had no such qualms when Eri had offered to buy them all ice cream though.

"What's so funny?" Eri asked, carefully trying to keep the ice cream cone from melting too much in the hot spring air.

"Oh…nothing. Just thinking of what some people would say if I got them chocolate ice cream."

"What's so funny about that?" Yuka asked curiously.

"Ah…chocolate allergies. He'd think I was trying to poison him or something…"

Eri and Yuka raised their eyebrows. "_He_?"

Was Kagome seeing someone after breaking up with Hojo? Some special someone…?

Kagome cursed mentally. She hadn't meant to say anything about Sesshoumaru at all, and had even made sure to keep the two away from the house. And then, she'd gone and blurted it out anyway! She could have kicked herself. "Cousin of mine."

She really was getting to be far too good at lying between her teeth. It was sickening.

Yuka sighed. She wasn't sure what to think. On one hand, her matchmaking plans were undisturbed, since it was a cousin she'd been talking about and not a boyfriend, but on the other hand, Kagome wasn't moving on even after breaking up with Hojo weeks before.

So very sad...she was still not quite sure why Kagome had broken up with Hojo, and as for Inuyasha, they had simply stopped hearing about him at some point. Actually, now that she thought about it, it was almost at this time last year that she must have broken up with Inuyasha. They had no idea what had happened, since Kagome didn't want to talk about it. Must've been a really bad breakup…

Eri poked Yuka, and pointed at her watch. "Um, Yuka? Earth to Yuka…"

"I'm here, I'm here!" Yuka held up her arms in defeat, and smiled.

"We should be going. It's twelve thirty, and I need to be at that party for one o'clock." Eri glanced at her watch again, wishing she'd thought to look at it earlier. At this rate, she might be late!

"Alrighty then. I'll get you there, don't worry!" Yuka led the way over to her car, and the three pulled out of the mall parking lot loaded with bags of shopping.

Most of those belonged to Yuka and Eri, but Kagome had one small bag from the second hand bookstore.

_Someone_ had published a book on fairy tales…and it was correct. The information about the quest for the Shikon was entirely accurate, from what she'd seen. Oh, it was styled after the Brothers Grimm, and it didn't go into _every_ little adventure they'd had, but from what she'd seen, it was frightening in its attention to detail…she'd _had_ to get it.

Yuka drove by Eri's house, and dropped her off before turning towards Sunset Shrine. She looked at Kagome out of the corner of her eye "So, what did you think of that body builder back there at the sports store? Wasn't he cute?!"

Kagome resisted the impulse to gag. Yeah, she remembered him alright. He'd been an absolute **idiot**, and his muscles should have been disallowed. **No one **needed quads bigger than their whole waist…it was more than slightly disturbing. "Ah…I suppose…"

Yuka sighed. She wasn't getting anywhere with Kagome….what was the matter with the girl? "Then what about that clerk in the shoe store? He was cute too."

"What clerk? I wasn't paying attention." Kagome smiled as the antique/junk shop she'd gotten Sesshoumaru's more traditional styled clothes at rushed past. Almost home. No more being afraid of Yuka's latest setup scheme…

Honestly! She'd tried to get her to talk to all the guys at the mall, it seemed.

Yuka slowed down and stopped in front of the long line of stairs up to the shrine. "I can't believe you don't remember him! He had this awesome bleach blond hair and a wrestling t-shirt on!"

"Really? I didn't notice him at all." Kagome picked up her book, and got out of the sporty little car. "I'll talk to you soon! Bye!"

"Bye!" Yuka shut the door, and scowled. Damn. Why couldn't she get Kagome to notice all the guys at the mall? What was wrong with her? She'd been strange for the whole past year, or years, if you counted all the time she was ill, but even worse these past few weeks it seemed…

Yuka drove off, still puzzled as to what was going on.

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Kagome sighed, and looked at her watch. Bang on one o'clock. Perfect. She started climbing up the stairs, and unlocked the front door. Sesshoumaru was waiting in the front entryway for her, idly twirling the necklace of enchanted beads.

She stared at him for a moment, shocked, and pleasantly surprised. He had actually gone to the trouble of getting dressed in jeans and a t shirt. Wow. He must be pretty serious about this…

She frowned at his empty left sleeve. It was a lot more obvious he was missing his arm when he wasn't wearing a haori. Still…he must be at least halfway earnest about going out, or he wouldn't have gone to all this trouble… and a missing arm was…while not strictly normal, it wasn't nearly as hard to explain as a tail.

For not wanting to look like a human, he was doing a pretty good job of pretending to be one so far. Much better than Inuyasha had, at any rate. It would be perfect once he had her necklace on. Unless he said or did something stupid…

She sighed. She felt like glaring at him, regardless of how he looked. If he'd gotten all dressed up, he'd want some place to go. "Mom and Souta still here?"

"No."

They'd gone out earlier, after he'd asked about shoes. Souta had seemed to think him wearing shoes and modern clothing was highly entertaining for some reason. He had no idea why. It was simply a matter of being practical.

At least the silly things had fit. Souta had large enough feet. There was no way he'd have ever managed to get any of the other shoes in this house on.

"Ah. Well, I guess they won't be back from getting Souta's new school uniform for a bit. Tell you what. I'll eat lunch, and then we'll go see what Tokyo looks like."

Sesshoumaru inwardly sighed at the delay, but followed her back to the kitchen. He had a few questions he wanted to ask. "Is there an easy way to track a single person in this city?"

"Are you still after this…what was her name? Damia? The Internet works well enough for that. You don't know where she is, or even if she lives in Japan. That would make it a snap, but without that information…. Why is she so important that you have to run around Tokyo looking for her?"

Sesshoumaru sighed again. He might as well say something. She'd know soon enough once they got back home anyway. The overthrow of the lord of the West was not something few would know about. The news would have spread like wildfire. It would probably be known to her within an hour of their return. Besides…why hide something so trivial when it was not even a secret? Especially someone to whom he owned so much.

"She…is the one who imprisoned me, with the help of a miko. She is the one who most likely rules in the West now."

Kagome blinked. No wonder he wanted to find her so badly. He wouldn't forget something like that in a thousand years. He was too proud to ever forget that.

"I see. Well…I'm sorry, but unless you know something about her, such as where she lives, or an address…and you don't...then there's no way to find her, really. You'd be walking around Tokyo blindly. I haven't seen or sensed any youkai on this side of the well, much less one like her. I'm sorry." Kagome smiled sympathetically, and shrugged..

Sesshoumaru grimaced slightly. He'd had a feeling it might come to that. "Then that is what I will do. I wish to see this Tokyo." He watched as Kagome groaned, and grabbed herself some food from the cupboard.

"Don't tell me you just want to wander around for hours looking for her…" Kagome shuddered slightly. He must really be after this Damia person's blood, if she had had anything to do with him being turned into a statue and left to gather dust for several odd centuries!

But…. Did Sesshoumaru know how _large_ Tokyo was? Or how many people lived here? He must not have a clue….

"Yes. Why not? Is there something I should know?"

Kagome gave him a flat look. "You _do_ know that there's over ten million people in Tokyo alone? That's not counting the rest of Japan even…" What if she was in Osaka, or something…?

Sesshoumaru blinked. "Over ten million?"

"Yes. Several million. Plus, it takes a long time to get across town on foot. I don't know whether an entire day would be enough or not, since I've never tried it. That's just going across town, let alone sticking our noses into the lives of said millions of people. I don't want to do that."

Sesshoumaru blinked again. He had not expected this little…snag. Millions of people? _Millions_ of _humans_? In…just Tokyo? What was this world coming to…?

Well. It didn't change things. Much. It just meant he'd be spending more - much more - time looking around. He didn't know how long it would take to find Damia, but he was going to do it in this era, or at home. He didn't care if it took a hundred years before he either found her or got back home. He would find her, and then…she would know exactly how angry he was with her. Blasted deserter...

Besides…what _else_ was he going to do? Tetsusaiga wasn't going to suddenly welcome him with open arms if he sat around long enough. The barrier was the only other thing he could work on.

Damn that barrier. Damn _all_ barriers while he was at it…

"Still, I wish to see Tokyo." He looked out the window, eyes betraying something not quite felt.

This was all he really could do, wasn't it? Go out and let his wandering feet lead him over the hills. Or metropolis. Alone. Without Rin.

Kagome sighed. He was so stubborn. She folded her arms, and looked at him. She frowned. She wondered suddenly what it would be like to abruptly have the ground torn out from under you. She knew what it was like to just _lose_ an entire era. First, she had been thrown into the past. She had at least known more about that era than he would have about the future. She had had a vague concept of what was going on. (History class had become useful at last). And at the end of the day, she had had her family to return to.

Then…she had lost that era. With no guarantee of return. She appreciated a little of what he must be feeling. She knew what betrayal felt like – Inuyasha and Kikyo... Kagome shifted on her seat a bit. She could sympathize with him. She didn't think he'd care for any pity though, so she remained silent.

What must it be like to lose everything but revenge? She could only guess. For really, he had lost everything, now that she thought about it. Lands, the few people he had traveled with. (And presumably liked) The very world he had been born in was gone, with no sure way back.

No wonder he was being so stubborn about going out to find vengeance. Or at least, she assumed it was vengeance. She had no idea what it was if not that. Everyone needed a goal, a purpose in life. Sesshoumaru had none, nothing but what he was trying to do. Kagome's eyes softened a bit, and she squashed any remaining irritation with Sesshoumaru. He was just trying to do something, anything, for the sake of doing something and not going crazy. Poor guy…

She might as well get ready to go then, hadn't she? He was probably impatient right now, though you'd never guess to look at him. She had to help him. She was hardly aware of why, only that she wanted to. He seemed so lost…Even though Inuyasha would have objected to any help she gave his brother, Kagome couldn't leave the Taiyoukai alone. It was a choice between feeling regret for not helping, and perhaps feeling guilty for betraying Inuyasha.

Kagome had made her choice when she took Sesshoumaru home. The past was past, and perhaps now she could work towards a better future. Belatedly, Kagome realized that, after this last week, she had begun to let go of the past, just a little.

Perhaps it was for the best. Inuyasha could rest quietly, and she could perhaps move on, and return home, to a future. It didn't do to live in the past and forget to _live_.

"Well…if you're dead set on walking all over town, then I'd best get ready." Kagome went to get her own pair of sneakers. Sesshoumaru followed her, slipping the necklace into place and melding into the image of a normal, albeit slightly armless, boy in his twenties. Kagome glanced back and nearly giggled. Oh dear. They might have to fend off random fangirls on the streets, at this rate…

Sesshoumaru glanced at his shoulder, where he could feel but no longer see his tail, looped around a shoulder in comfort. A few stray black hairs caught his eye, and he glared at them slightly. Damn human world…

Kagome fiddled with the laces, starting to plan out their route, mind focused entirely on practicality and not the past. She didn't think going downtown would be wise considering how many pedestrians there were. Sesshoumaru would not be used to the complete lack of personal space, and she didn't feel like dealing with whatever might happen. The mall was out for the same reason. Besides, Yuka had been considering heading back later to pick up that hold. She did _not_ want to meet her friend with Sesshoumaru in tow.

Kagome smiled. Why not take him past the park? It had a few trees. They sometimes reminded her of the lost era she had left behind, and they might remind him of his home as well. Plus, she had to take him to that new antiques shop. She had been meaning to get him another set of clothes anyways, and this seemed as good a time as any…

"We're going to head past a park, and past a few shops. Not too far from home, and not downtown. Plus, I am **not** taking you on a bus. Too many people on those things. Like being in sardine city…"

Sesshoumaru nodded. He didn't care where they went, only that they went. Preferably, if they went and found Damia…but he didn't delude himself. It was nearly impossible that they'd run into her. If what he'd been told was true, then it was even _more_ improbable that he'd run into her.

Of course…miracles _had_ been known to happen sometimes… surely by now he was due some good luck…

Kagome finished tying up her sneakers with a flourish, and stood up. "Alright. Next stop, Tokyo. Hands and arms inside the vehicle, and please refrain from attacking fellow passengers on your way out." Kagome grinned. This could be interesting. Scary…but somehow exciting. As long as there were no casualties, of course…

Sesshoumaru just raised an eyebrow. Fellow what? What was she babbling on about now…?

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_Gomen nasai, minna-san! I know I promised to update sometime yesterday, if not possible the week before. In hindsight, probably stupid; Thursday was the day from hell (to top off the week from said flaming abode). I didn't think that it was the day before midterms were due in, and the day I had some things booked that I couldn't miss, resulting in an all nighter… So much work… I am sleeping in till 7 tomorrow, now that my midterm portfolios are in. So happy…_

_Anywise, hoped you liked the chapter. It answerers all questions of whether Tetsusaiga and Sesshoumaru work together….for now. Bwahahah. I'm setting the pieces for the return to the feudal era up (even though I realize it doesn't look like it…) and the next few chapters will kick that into gear. Yay! _

_Reviews, and comments are all welcome! Thank you so much, guys! I realized today I have just over a hundred reviews. (I think Raven4 was lucky 100. w00t!) Thank you so very much! _) :D_  
_


	16. ch15:Antiquities

_Slightly extra **disclaimer **for this chapter; I do not own Bleach, or Urahara. I just happened to need someone to man the antiques shop, and he's my favorite shopkeeper. (grin) This **Isn't** a crossover._

**:: Antiquities ::**

Sesshoumaru looked at the blazing storm of colors on the humans walking by, and had to wonder how they managed to get such bright shades. Now that he thought about it, all the clothing he had seen here so far were in eye wrenching hues of red, green, blue and yellow. It was nearly as bright as the glowing restaurant sign he had caught a glimpse of just now.

He kept his eyes peeled, taking in everything without appearing to stare at anything in particular. He held himself on edge, as aware of his surroundings as if in enemy territory. He was, in a way. He was alone in a sea of humankind, and at the moment, they were threatening to drown him.

Everything, everywhere, was manmade! Where was the dominating forest, the expanse of untamed wilderness? This city was a construct of iron and plastic, of concrete and the living flesh that gave it its murmur of thousands of breathing, moving humans. It was a mosaic of intricate technology, of eye watering scents, of burning rubber and gas discharge strong enough to threaten a blackout.

Already, he had had to pause when a…what was it? A motorcycle? He had had to pause for a few seconds when one had started with a hissing, bubbling bang and taking off in a cloud of foul smelling excretions. He'd not been forced to stop long, just enough so that he could get past the throbbing headache, but it had been worrisome. He'd be better prepared for such assaults upon his senses now.

He glanced though yet another pane of some of the clearest glass he had ever seen, and marveled at the glowing pictures on a television inside the shop window. He was rather taken with the magical way the flat screen showed moving pictures. Just like the one at the Higurashi shrine. He was somewhat less enamored of the loud commentary about something called 'football' accompanying it. The human male was loud, grating, and reminded him vaguely of something unpleasant.

So far, they had walked a few miles and had seen many people, some dressed in the most outlandish clothing he'd ever seen. Many of the humans here had the brightly colored hair of youkai, or other attributes; painted nails, spiked hair and oddly colored irises.

Of course none of these humans were true youkai, merely colorful imitations. And none of the pedestrians in the street was Damia. That was a given. It seemed even more unlikely they'd find her now than it had when they'd left the house. The number of humans living here hadn't really sunk in when he'd heard the figures before, but now it was beginning to dawn on him exactly what millions meant. More identical streets, all filled with people, stretching for miles and miles and miles. More walking around this city forever. Even beyond this place, there were many more towns, all filled to the brim with humanity in all its cheerful disregard for youkai's existence. It was worse than a needle in a haystack.

He remained silent, slightly overwhelmed by the numbers of prosperous people. In his realm, there had been a few villages of youkai, and a small household and extended family living with him, serving as generals and warriors, and the army. There were about an equal number of youkai in the East, North and South, in addition to the wandering and hermit youkai. He didn't bother counting the mindless vermin that seemed to infest everything they touched. There was only one youkai city-state. A very small population center near the middle of Japan, the youkai city of Aziu. He wondered what had happened to it. Had his kind fared nearly as well the numerous humans in the years since his incarceration, or had something happened…?

Where were they? What would he find if he went to Aizu now? A ruin? Or...nothing?

Kagome stopped at the end of the sidewalk, and waited for some unknown signal to be given before crossing the street towards a distant speck of chlorophyll green. Not an unreal plastic dye either, but a wholesome forest hue. He wanted to see real trees again. The poor things planted by the road were not trees at all, more like a sullen dwarf shrub.

He wondered if there were trees growing in the middle of this urban jungle, and almost imperceptibly sped up. He wanted to hide in a forest, away from all this noise and stench, all these people. A _real _forest, one that reached for the skies and was home to the familiar rabbits and deer he had once hunted, as well as many youkai; a forest without humans

He wanted to hide even if he knew it couldn't possibly a forest like the ones he remembered, ones that had hardly been touched in generations, trees that stretched for a full day's hike in any direction easily. He sighed softly. He should not be thinking of hiding. He was Sesshoumaru, and he was _not_ going to run from this world.

…Even if, in the darkest, most secret depths of his annoyingly scattered mind, he wanted to curl up in a forest clearing and watch everything from a safe distance.

But he knew he couldn't do that, and he felt shamed for even _wanting_ to do such a thing. He was not afraid of humans, and he wasn't afraid of this new world. He would _prove_ it.

Kagome smiled and stopped as they arrived at a stand of trees, beside a wooden structure swarming with human children. She'd been enjoying the walk so far, except for her feet. "Here we are! Want to stop for a bit? I've been walking for an hour already, and my feet are killing me."

Kagome watched the crowds nervously as she sat down. They hadn't really called much attention to themselves. Perhaps her fears of being denounced in the streets were unfounded. Oh, a few odd looks had been given Sesshoumaru, but it hadn't been for his behavior.

He was much better at blending in with modern day Tokyo than Inuyasha had been, surprisingly. Inuyasha had never even _tried_ to wear normal clothing, and had refused all forms of footwear. She hadn't known how to do an illusion then, so he'd worn a ball cap. Unfortunately, despite his minimal disguise, he hadn't known when to stay quiet.

Sesshoumaru wore the clothes, stayed silent, had grudgingly worn Souta's enormous sneakers, and had the illusion spell on him. He might hate it a great deal more than Inuyasha had seemed to, but it worked well enough for now.

No, the only looks he'd gotten were for the long black hair loose on his back, and the very visibly empty sleeve. People hadn't _stared_, exactly (the height of rudeness!), he'd just gotten a few odd looks. Which was how she wanted it. They didn't need trouble. Trouble seemed to find them on its own often enough without help.

Sesshoumaru didn't comment on the park she'd brought them to. He followed Kagome to a bench set slightly back into the trees, and watched while she sat down with a sigh. His eyes drifted slowly across the greenery.

Nothing like home. The trees had to be less than thirty years old, and there was no undergrowth to speak of. There were no signs of anything but the occasional rabbit either…and was that a child's toy, lying forgotten under a tree?

He turned his attention to the children laughing on the wooden construct a short ways away.

Children laughing…that hadn't changed.

They sounded almost like Rin, giggling over the same incomprehensible things. Why was it fun to whirl in circles, to braid flowers, to play with toys? Did the doll he'd seen belong to one of them? Perhaps it did.

Why hadn't he ever gotten something like that for Rin? She might have liked it. She had certainly enjoyed playing with flowers, his hair and/or tail, or a combination thereof. Why hadn't he thought of getting her something like that doll? He wondered…

He watched the children play while Kagome massaged a foot. Rin had laughed just like that…

Kagome sighed and put her shoe back on slowly. She grimaced at it. She should be doing better than this! They'd only been walking for a short space, compared to the distances Inuyasha had demanded they cover. She was woefully out of shape. "I don't know how the stupid rocks get in my shoes, but they do. You ready to go?"

Sesshoumaru nodded, still watching the children swinging on the metal bars, or flying on the plastic seats, swinging back and forth, higher each time.

Rin would have loved this place.

"Sesshoumaru?" Kagome frowned. She followed his gaze, and was puzzled as it fell on the park. Why was he interested in the children there? He didn't like humans, right? So why was he watching them with that unreadable expression on his face…?

She thought hard for a moment before she remembered something that might explain it. Of course…there had been that little girl. The one she had seen with him, the one under his protection. Naraku had called her his weak point, but she didn't think it was so. If anything, she must have made him stronger, better able to understand relationships between people, something she sensed was uncharted territory for him.

"What was her name?" she asked softly.

Sesshoumaru turned to face her, eyes slightly startled. He had almost forgotten about Kagome. How could she know…? How did she know what was going through his head? No one was supposed to be able to guess what he was thinking. No one had in years. He closed his eyes. He must have given away too much, turning around so suddenly.

"Rin. It was Rin."

He opened his eyes, every bit of control he had built up over the centuries needed to keep his voice steady, his eyes unreadable. He walked a few steps and stopped, waiting for Kagome to start leading him around Tokyo again.

He had said too much.

Kagome looked back at the children in the park once more, and then took the lead. Sesshoumaru fell into place beside her silently. She could no longer even guess what he was thinking.

She remained silent, not even providing any commentary on where they were.

Rin. So that was her name. She remembered now. He must know that she had to be dead, after all these years. Perhaps she had died before he was a statue, even. Or perhaps she would be waiting after he returned from the future. Either way, she wasn't with Sesshoumaru now and he obviously missed her company.

He must have really cared about her. She wondered what it must have cost for him to admit even that little bit to what had happened. She was surprised he'd said anything, really. She'd always thought he was rather heartless. But he wasn't, even though he'd tried to hide it.

He had been looking after Rin, or at least let her follow him around. He missed her.

He must have a heart buried somewhere after all...

She didn't know what the girl had been to him, or why Rin followed him. She didn't know why Rin was with an aristocratic assassin like him in the first place.

But whatever the facts, they couldn't cover up that he had really cared about her. The children playing must have reminded him of another small child.

Kagome stole a glance sideways. She felt a sudden rush of sympathy for the youkai, even though she knew he would despise the emotions.

If he had a heart, he was probably homesick. Not that he'd admit it. He needed to go home just as much as she wanted to, but they were both stuck. Maybe, though, they could help each other out. Maybe.

Kagome lifted her head, and smiled. They were just passing one of her favorite restaurants. She pointed this out to Sesshoumaru, not caring that he didn't bother to respond. No doubt he would file the information away somewhere in that infuriating mind along with all the other bits and pieces of information he'd accumulated.

Another hour later, when it was just past quarter to four she paused on a street corner, and sighed. Sesshoumaru examined the far side of the street, waiting for the light to change to 'walk'.

Kagome stepped out into the road tiredly. They were on their way home. Sesshoumaru didn't seem to be feeling the effects of walking all over town for hours, but it had been a while since she'd done day-long hikes on a regular basis, and she was, as she had previously noted, not in the best physical shape she could be. Archery practice only strengthened her arms, not her legs.

She made a face. That really needed fixing. She should be able to go another couple of hours without feeling like this. Morning jogging might be in order here… if there was ever time...

At least, she reflected, she didn't complain nearly as much as she had at first. She'd been bad about that when she'd first landed in the past. She had a horror of whining about the condition of her shoes or feet in front of Sesshoumaru. For some reason, she was determined to prove something to him.

They were only about a block away from the antiques shop she'd wanted to visit. It wasn't precisely an antiques shop, but it was close enough that it was what she'd labeled it as in her mind. The owner seemed to dabble in everything. He would enthusiastically point out the books, CDs, clothing and knickknacks of pottery on his shelves. Once, she'd even seen an antique katana on sale for an enormous fee.

If she ever got back home, maybe she could sell Urahara things from the feudal era to get them out of debt…he'd probably love to buy them from her, if she brought things like old swords or knickknacks back. He also wouldn't ask questions. He'd just sit there in that striped hat, eyes shaded and giving away nothing.

She had never seen him without the hat, actually. Interesting fellow. Kagome's face grew an evil grin. Perhaps she should introduce him to Yuka. He was good looking enough for her friend's exacting tastes, under the hat. _She_ could be the one playing matchmaker for once! She and Yuka knew each other well enough that the matchmaking was an old joke, and neither took offense, but really, some days…

Kagome paused in front of the shop, and smiled. Sesshoumaru raised an eyebrow. So far on their trip, she hadn't bothered going inside any of the shops. What was so special about this one?

"I think you could use another few clothes, don't you? This is where I got things before. Tell me if you see anything you like, alright?"

She looked at the shop again. "I know the owner. Nice guy. I think he has more than a few odder customers, actually. So he probably won't care if you aren't exactly the average Joe."

Sesshoumaru nodded shortly. He wouldn't mind a few more articles of clothing to his name. He didn't want to have to wear the jeans he had on –or any_ other_ pair of jeans- ever again, and the clothing he'd arrived in was in tatters. His eyes narrowed slightly as he surveyed the shop entrance.

There was something just beyond the edge of perception in there. Almost like… It wasn't malevolent, so far as he knew, but it was hard to tell. He made a mental note to look for the source. It might be important.

Or not. It could just be some old, misplaced piece of nothing. Like he'd been, before Kagome found him. Sometimes he wasn't sure that he wasn't still a forgotten piece of history.

He wondered briefly if Kagome felt it, but she hadn't mentioned anything. Perhaps she hadn't, yet. He knew she wasn't exactly reliable when it came to the more arcane arts.

Kagome pushed open the door, and entered with him on her heels.

A vague shadow on the far side of the room stood up, materializing into a man with sandals, cane and hat. "Ah! Kagome! Welcome! Is there anything I can do for you today?"

"Not in particular. This is Sesshoumaru. He's looking for a few more clothes, and me…just browsing, I guess." Kagome smiled. "Do you still have that bow out back?"

"But of course! Right here…"

They disappeared around a bend in the displays, and Sesshoumaru examined the room he now found himself in. He wondered what sort of bow Kagome had gone to look at.

The feeling was stronger once inside the shop, and he could now identify what he had sensed as scrolls. Old ones, from the feel of things. He glanced at the jumble of things in the room, and resigned himself to hunting through it to find not only the scrolls, but a few more pieces of clothing as well.

He glanced back towards where Kagome and the shopkeeper had disappeared to. Something about the man disconcerted him. He wondered if this human was really the simple shopkeeper he appeared to be. With real scrolls, not fake ones, in his possession he might not be. Or perhaps he just happened to have the items in his store. Sesshoumaru didn't know.

Sesshoumaru shrugged. It wasn't any of his business what the man was or wasn't. He was in no position to judge who was 'normal' apparently, since he was outside the norm himself now. As long as the man made no unwelcome inquires, there was no reason to care.

He scrutinized a particularly fine white hakama trimmed in blue and deep red. Not only was it in his house colors, it was also of very fine weave. He wondered how these humans managed to get such superior cloth. All the clothing he'd seen so far had had been of similar quality. At least. The things that went with it were of the same quality, and reminded him of his usual garb. Red and white.

He made a mental note of where he'd found them, and continued in the quest for the scrolls. They were somewhere behind that stack of books. He was sure of it. He carefully pushed the stack of covers and ink scratched pages aside to reveal a box.

Neatly arranged in symmetrical order on the lid were the scrolls he'd been looking for. They looked quite old enough to be from the so called 'feudal era'. There was water damage on one of them, and the ones towards the back had stopped working. The rest simply looked scruffy. Genuine scrolls, unlike the annoying scraps of paper he was pelted with at the shrine.

Without touching any of the active scrolls, Sesshoumaru pulled out the box carefully, and looked at it.

A finely grained, dark wood laced with scratches and trimmed in iron met his inspection. There was another piece of paper lying on top of the lusterless box. It looked like it was from one of the books he'd moved.

He examined the paper, and was annoyed at what he found. The writing must be in another language, one he couldn't read. It might just be important, but he couldn't tell.

The dim murmur of conversation between the storekeeper and Kagome came closer, and he turned around to see them both wander back into the room. Kagome walked over to him.

"What did you find?" She blinked at the box. "Hey…I recognize those…"

Sesshoumaru held up the piece of paper. "What's this?" He held the paper between his fingers, slightly disdainfully.

Kagome took it to look at. "English. Says something along the lines of 'Shipment to Tokyo, May 2000' and gives a list of book titles." She held it up. "Do you need this, Urahara? Looks like inventory or something."

"Probably. Leave it there, would you?"

"I see. English."

Kagome laughed. "Yeah. Weird language. They spell everything non-phonetically so it's hard to tell, and the pronunciation is worse. None of the Canadians, American or British agree on the rules of language. And, instead of reading from top to bottom you read backwards across the page! Messed up, isn't it?"

Sesshoumaru had to agree. He pointed out the box, quietly asking "Can you feel it?"

"Feel what?"

Sesshoumaru sighed in exasperation. She was even less competent than he'd thought. "You need training. You should at least know that much."

Kagome went slightly red. "When would I have been able to do that? Huh?" She glared at him before controlling her temper. Much as she hated to admit it, he was right.

"So? What are you saying about the box?" She paused. She liked the shopkeeper well enough, but he didn't need to know the details of why she was so interested in the scroll covered case. Which meant she couldn't start looking closely at it till she got home.

"I think we should take it with us." Sesshoumaru said softly, so the shopkeeper wouldn't hear.

Kagome examined it. The scrolls looked old on it, crude. Like the ones Miroku used to…did…make, though much simpler. She wondered if it was genuine, or what. Couldn't hurt to get the box. She glanced at the price, and smirked. For _that_ price, they couldn't go wrong.

"Alright, we get the box. Find anything else?"

Sesshoumaru delicately picked up the hakama and the red trimmed top to go with it. Kagome unceremoniously grabbed them out of his hand, and went off to pay for what they'd found.

Urahara counted out the change, and looked over the purchases with an approving eye. "I like those colors. They suit you, Sesshoumaru."

Sesshoumaru narrowed his eyes a fraction. Perhaps he was simply being too suspicious…but…

There were no further comments as they left the shop, presumably headed for home. Kagome hugged the bag with the box in it tightly. She'd have to open it as soon as they got home, and see what little treasures they'd found. What could have been guarded this well? She suspected that at least some of the scrolls pasted on it were still active.

What could be inside it? Lost piles of treasure, or gems and gold? Probably not. She was being overtly romantic. She wondered what was really inside.

She shifted the other bag of clothes on her arm, and momentarily wondered why she was carrying Sesshoumaru's purchases for him. Especially after she was the one who'd bought them for him in the first place.

Bah. One day, the overgrown poodle would be carrying her stuff for her instead…and would not demand sightseeing tours of Tokyo at midnight, either!

Maybe she'd make him give her a tour of his castle in return. If he had one, that is. Usually a ruler had a castle, and Sesshoumaru was a ruler. Or at least, he had been…

She might have to help him get his castle back, just so she could get a tour of the place at his expense! If that was what this Damia person had done, at least. He hadn't said much about her or what was going on. She needed to fix that soon, and find out the rest of the story. She'd been far too tired, stressed, and distracted by his appearance to actually do anything but cope.

The long flight of steps up to the shrine came into view, and she smiled. Almost there. She couldn't wait till dinner happened. She was starving.

Sesshoumaru wondered what the distant shouts from above them were about. It sounded like one of the excited voices was Souta. He didn't know who the other boy was, but it didn't particularly matter. It also sounded like a fountain had been set up. He could smell water, and hear it spraying onto the flagstone courtyard.

As they finally rounded the last of the steps, two boys ran past, both soaked. He paused as he took in the brilliantly colored guns they both had in their hands.

Were these people insane!? Did they let children have guns to play with? He winced, and waited for an explosion as one of them pulled the trigger, but frowned as water sprayed out of the barrel instead of death.

Correction. Slightly less destructive than real guns. He watched as grass went flying past, dislodged by the sharp blast of water.

"I am so getting you for that, Souta!" the other boy yelled, sprinting past.

Kagome sighed. "Great. World war three on my front doorstep, courtesy of little brother…"

Sesshoumaru raised an eyebrow. World war _three_? Why not world war one? Had there already been world wars one _and_ two? Kami… humans really _were_ born with an urge for self destruction…

Kagome sprinted for the front door, and fiddled with her keys quickly. She opened the door just as the two boys spotted the newcomers, and made a dash towards the door, hugging her precious box close. Kagome slammed the door shut on their faces just in time to avoid being soaked.

Sesshoumaru watched from the top of the stone stairs, before moving across to the door. "Kagome, I'm still out here. Let me in."

Kagome sighed. Demanding, wasn't he? And after she'd hauled all his junk home too…he could get soaked for all she cared.

"Play nicely! Or else!" She called out loudly from behind the door, grinning. Just for that, he could stay out there. She doubted he'd get soaked anyway. More likely he'd escape Souta and his friend somehow no worse for wear.

Sesshoumaru stared at the closed door. Had she just refused to open the door? Had she?

She_ had_!

There was no way he would stoop to 'playing nicely' with these plastic contraptions that spat water. He tuned around slowly. Plastic ought to melt quite easily, if he grabbed them and got rid of the guns. He remembered he'd left the window to his room open, and could get in easily enough after without resorting to destroying the front door.

He turned around just in time to face two grinning boys, both holding guns pointed at him. He narrowed his eyes slightly.

Kagome would _not_ like it if he decided to destroy the guns, or if he happened to harm either of their owners. She had said he was to be nice, or else, hadn't she? She'd probably get all worked up if they ended up slightly unconscious… He sighed. That stopped him from doing anything fun…

"Hands up Sesshoumaru!" Souta yelled, and shifted the gun slightly to get better aim. He was grinning widely. Sesshoumaru would probably be great in a water gun fight! He was so fast!

Sesshoumaru stared at the water gun pointed at him, and then watched calmly as water shot towards him. He decided very quickly that no, he couldn't do anything permanent or even temporary to let the two know what a mistake attacking him had been, or Kagome would be _impossible_ to live with, and that he did not particularly care for becoming as soaked as the two boys were. He hated getting wet unless it was because he was bathing in warm hot springs... Drying off (especially with cold water!) was always hell afterwards.

He jumped out of the way with swift, practiced ease, and quickly got to his window. No point in standing around waiting to be tagged…

Souta and his friend stared at where he had been. From their point of view, he had simply…vanished off the doorstep. The water gun slowly died, leaving a trail of water to where Sesshoumaru had been.

"Weird….that was cool. And a little creepy. How'd he do it?" Souta's friend commented, scratching his head. "Wish _I_ could do that…"

"Yeah. So do I. Must be some ninja thing or something…" Souta ran, squirting at his friend as he hid behind a pillar to snipe. So what if Sesshoumaru didn't join in? That disappearing trick was pretty cool. Was it magic or something? Sesshoumaru was so cool! "Gottcha!"

111111111

Sesshoumaru closed the window, wanting to make sure that no water came inside with him. He had not expected to be shut out of the house by Kagome. True, he thought she had only been having a joke, but he didn't care for that particular brand of humor.

He also despised being soaked, shot at, or forced to retreat from two human boys attacking him for no apparent reason other than 'fun and games'. He was going to tell Kagome exactly that. He pried off his enchanted beads with relief and tossed it on the bed. He'd had more than enough of the beastly thing for today.

He stretched out slightly. The charm didn't make him feel closed in, physically, but it felt like he was trapped mentally. Not a pleasant feeling. It had been a relief to take it off. He hated being trapped, being fenced in.

Sesshoumaru slipped downstairs, and came up behind Kagome, who'd unpacked in the kitchen. She turned around and smiled innocently. "Not wet, are you?"

He half glared at her for the briefest moment. "No. But I do _not_ care for being left out for them to attack. Do not do that again."

Kagome snorted. "You need to get a sense of humor, Sesshoumaru. Maybe if you're lucky, you can buy one at a discount on e-bay. Besides, I knew you wouldn't get wet anyway, and so no harm done. Alright?"

Sesshoumaru was not convinced. _Why_ did he need to buy a sense of humor? He had one already, though he admitted it was rather a dry one. It certainly didn't extend to becoming soaked to provide Kagome some cheep amusement! "Fine. But still, never again. Now, about that box…"

Kagome turned around, and looked at the box on the kitchen table. She traced one of the scrolls on it. "I don't think it's old enough to be from our time. The light in that man's shop isn't the best, and it looked older there. I think it's from near the end of the Tokugawa era.

Sesshoumaru raised an eyebrow. "I didn't know you were a historian. How long ago was this Tokugawa era?"

"I'm not really a historian. But I work at a museum, and they have a bunch of old stuff. It's a knack I picked up, telling how old something is. Plus….I'll confess to being something of a history nerd. I liked reading about the time I went to. Although there were shocking amounts about youkai that never made it into my textbook." Kagome laughed. "I think it's about 175ish years old. Let's find out, after we go upstairs. I don't want those two barging in here and interrupting!"

Kagome took everything upstairs and then closed the door to her room, setting the box on her desk beside a snoozing Shiro. The bird opened an eye, dismissed everyone as unimportant, then went back to more interesting things like sleeping. No food, apparently, equated to no interest.

Kagome carefully went to work on the lock on the battered outside of the box, rudimentary lock pick in hand. Why couldn't there have been a key? She was really bad when it came to picking locks with bobby pins.

Sesshoumaru leaned over. "Why are you wasting time on that? Melt it." He held his hand over the lock suggestively. It would be much simpler that way. He could even get rid of it without damaging the box, if Kagome would just move her hands out of the way.

Kagome looked at him in horror. "Damage this? It's at least a hundred years old!"

Sesshoumaru shrugged. Why did that make it special? He was older than that, and she certainly didn't give him special treatment because of it! "So?"

Kagome stared at him. "Well, it's important not to damage it!" She looked at the box again, slipping a bobby pin into the lock. "Besides…what if you accidentally melted something important?"

"I would not offer to melt the lock if I thought I would do any damage." He explained patiently. Did she think he was that clumsy? Only an amateur would do something like that.

Kagome hmfted. She still wasn't going to let him try anything. She poked at the lock again.

"I could also **cut** the lock." Sesshoumaru pointed out, after Kagome had spent a few more minutes working on it. He wanted her to get this over with, so he could examine the contents of that box! He stared at her attempts to unlock the box with a faint trace of amusement. Stubborn woman…

Kagome glared at him, then the lock. "No." She made a fist with her hand, and shook it at the box. "Stupid thing. Wish I could tell when the tumblers were work…ing." She grinned suddenly.

Of course! It was so simple! If she could hear the tumblers fall into place, she'd have it open in no time. "Sesshoumaru, can you hear the tumblers in there? Can you tell me when they click into place?"

He nodded. He hadn't really been paying attention to the noises in the lock, but he could do that easily enough. "The first ones already clicked."

Kagome pried at the lock some more. "Third one clicked. One more."

The lock suddenly popped open, and Kagome brandished her bobby pin at it. "Haha! Beat ya!" She was tempted to point out that this had been accomplished without cutting _or_ melting the lock, but let it go. She'd already teased Sesshoumaru enough by shutting him out with the water wielding delinquents outside. That was enough for today. Much more, and she'd have a sulking Sesshoumaru. Not a pleasant thought.

She didn't need him to get irritated enough with her to start thinking about leaving the house on his own. She was fairly certain he'd abandoned any thoughts of harming her or anyone else here. She was also fairly sure that he wouldn't hurt her once they got home either. Otherwise, she wouldn't dare tease him.

Oh well. It was probably good for him to see that the world did not run when he told it to, and would further benefit him by (hopefully) giving him the basics in the humor department. Honestly. He was always so quiet. He never laughed, and she'd hardly seen anything on his face other than the usual mask!

"Good. Open it."

Sesshoumaru needn't have said anything. She was already lifting up the lid carefully. It was pretty heavy, considering. She made sure she didn't disturb the scrolls on top. She thought they had something to do with preserving whatever was inside. They looked a little like what Miroku had used once or twice to keep the food fresh.

She put the lid on the table, and turned around to look at her treasures.

Paper. It was all papers. Kagome stared at the rolled up parchment, and at the sheets of paper stacked carefully inside.

She was sure those scrolls had been preserving the paper now. They looked much newer than she'd have expected, as though they'd been written quite a few years after the box was made. Pity the scrolls hadn't done much for the box itself.

She picked up the paper on top, and started reading.

_Year 2, Meiji. (1869) Kyoto, Kamigamo Shirne, Nishimura House._

_I wonder who will read this account._

_I can only hope that it survives to be read by more favorable eyes. Someone told me it would, that she'd seen it in a dream, but I wonder. Predicting the future is hard to do._

_But why I write this... The government no longer looks kindly on some of the old practices. They embrace the West, and forget what it is to be Japan, to be ourselves. Since the youkai have gone, some of the old ways are no longer needed. Already they are fading. The newer shrines in the city no longer bother to teach young students how to control power. The Kamo Shirines are old, and therefore, we still remain in esteem, but I fear not for long. I know I don't hold half the knowledge I would have, if I'd been taught before the youkai vanished, or even before the loss of some of the other older arts._

_I know that I was not taught all I would have been, had I been in training before the 1830's. Why should a Meiji Miko know how to do an exorcism properly? There is no longer a need to know this. That is their new philosophy. There's nothing to get rid of. Even before the black ships came in 1853, the youkai were long gone. Why should I practice the sword, the bow, when so many have guns? _

_Nevertheless, I practice. And I have written what I can remember of my scanty training here. I have collected all I could of others remembrances. I want even this little bit to survive. So that someday, someone may remember the old world. My world. Perhaps not old, when you think of what has gone before, but I dare say old enough to the future…__  
_  
Kagome put the paper down, eyes wide. "This…this is…a miko's journal?" A miko's journal. Kagome had a sudden, burning hope that here was what she needed, here was information that might help her to get home, here was the answer...! Pleasepleaseplease, let the paper have _something_ on the author's training, even if it was only a small amount...!

The paper didn't mention the authors name, not once. She handed the top paper to Sesshoumaru to read, struck dumb with pleasant shock. She could not believe what she was seeing. This…was incredible. She was tempted to pinch herself to check if she was dreaming.

Sesshoumaru finished reading, considering the information carefully. Youkai disappearing... "You said this was 2001, correct?"

Kagome broke off trying to decide if this was for real of not, and nodded. "Yeah. Why?"

"It says something in here about the youkai disappearing. It does not say why, just when they vanished." He looked at the paper again thoughtfully. Would there be more information in there? There might be. He hoped so. According to this, there were slightly less than 180 years between his time and when they disappeared.

What had happened? What could have killed them all? Or did gone simply mean they'd left, not died? Could he change it?

But…if this was history, if it had already happened…but he could prevent it, and then it wouldn't be history, and this paper probably wouldn't exist…so he wouldn't know…

Time travel was far too confusing…

He looked up from the paper. Kagome was already rummaging further in the box, bringing out all the sheets to stack them on the table. She looked at the wavering heap, then put her head to one side "Can we stick this on the floor and spread it out?"

He nodded. He had no objections. He could read through as much of the writing as he could possibly want, tonight. He had to know what had happened.

Kagome grabbed the messy pile, and bent down to place it gently on the rug. Sesshoumaru glanced uneasily at the paper in his hand. He scanned it again. 1830's. That was the time the youkai had disappeared in. What had happened? He watched Kagome shuffling papers, brooding.

Sesshoumaru looked back at the paper, then at the bird house. He still disapproved of cages, even if Kagome had explained patiently that it was to keep the fat cat, Buyo, out. If she had been a better miko, then she could have told the cat the bird was not to be touched, with a fair amount of success.

...Actually, she might have been successful anyways. The cat was so fat it might not even bother the bird, if Shiro ever got out…

He put down the top piece of paper in his hand, and picked up another stack. Kagome took a few sheets for herself, and sat down on the bed absently to read.

He looked at her, then at the bed, and settled on the floor beside the largest pile, eyes already scanning the sloppy mix of tapering brush strokes. He cursed the author. This would take a long time to read though, if all the writing was this bad. It was like trying to decipher chicken scratches!

111111111111

A few hours later, Kagome rubbed her eyes and flopped backwards, groaning. "This is going to take forever." She looked at the piles of paper they'd sorted through.

The papers had not really told her much of value, but here and there, there had been a piece of gold in all the dross. Instructions on how to focus yourself, to use purifying power through a weapon. She had read it, and realized that the woman had described exactly how she herself did it, though her descriptions of a small, pale glow around a sword left Kagome thinking that she'd not been too powerful. But the other suggestions had led Kagome to think about how else her purifying arrows could be applied. Perhaps, if she concentrated power in her skin, instead of in an arrow…? It might make a good shield. Or a katana, though she had no idea how to use one…

She glared at the small piles of paper around the room, each labeled neatly. The pages, they'd soon found, were not organized by topic, date, or, indeed, organized at all. They'd simply been tossed into the box.

So now they had a very small pile labeled 'weapons', one even smaller labeled 'healing', another for ceremonies without anything involved to train power (this one quite large), and even larger one with _nothing_ of value, and a single sheet Sesshoumaru had put aside, the cover sheet. She thought it had something to do with the mention of a mass youkai disappearance. Kagome grimaced, and wished that the stack had been in order, but apparently it had just been shoved in the box. Bits and pieces made no sense, and she wasn't even sure it was all here. Papers marked 1867, 1870, with no date at all….there was no order to anything!

She sighed, and sat up, head aching from that small movement. It was getting on to 2 o'clock by now. Sesshoumaru finally glanced up. "I'm calling it a night. Are you going to keep reading while the rest of us snooze?"

He nodded, still frustrated by the lack of relevant information. But there might yet be something of use, if he read though enough paper. It seemed a suitable activity to do while they were asleep. He watched as Kagome left, careful to avoid disturbing the paper piles scattered throughout the room. He stretched, got up, and settled himself cross-legged on the bed she'd just vacated, quietly flipping on his favorite 'radio' station he'd discovered on her boom box. It was interesting to listen to, in the background. It told him a lot, although he didn't understand most of it other than the music. Traffic and weather reports were just this side of gibberish to him. If you wanted to know the weather, why not stick you head outside the window…?

He sighed, and pulled another scribbled on bit of old paper towards himself, trying to find anything that would allow him to go home, or to find out what had happened so long ago.

111111111111111111111111111

_There we go. (I simply had to make my sentiments on British/American/Canadian spelling known. Lol. It's particularly annoying when you write programs or html – 'colour' won't work, and you can't figure out why, because it's spelled right to me, (I use both now becasue of that. Confuseing) but it's an American system. Grr…)_

_Oh, and before I forget again; I'm not sure if I've ever mentioned the fact that this story is based on where the anime leaves off. I know the manga extends far beyond that, (apparently there's plans to reach at least 500 chapters…o.o) but because I didn't feel like adapting to every new change the manga brings, I decided on working from a fixed point in time. _

_Thank you for the many kind reviews:D Huge thanks to Trisak! (happy grin)  
_


	17. ch16:I am a Rock

**:: I Am A Rock ::**

Kagome sighed, and put her head down on her hands. She started reading again, too tired to really register what the rambling author of the scroll, who she _thought_ was called Jinoue, was saying. Right then, she wasn't up to dealing with the long, drawn out sentences of the word-loving miko.

_ "…true Miko are rare, now. Miko born, they called them. They have the power like it or no_. _Amiritsu is the only woman I know who fits into that category. Myself, and the rest of the miko who wield even a little power, are all able to do it through training; we had to develop what every human is born with some measure of…hardly anyone bothers with that these days…everyone has potential for some amount of spiritual power, but only if trained is it…_ _Amiritsu , however, being miko born would have had the power, and it made itself known. It always does, in the end…possible to make a bargain with a youkai, gaining its power and lifespan, only…_ _Amiritsu said there was one who….who…"_

The tapering brush strokes blurred, and swam. Kagome's head slipped down onto the table, bobbing on waves of sleep, until she dipped just a little too low and hit her forehead on the table, startling herself awake.

She grimaced, and rubbed at her skull. Great. Fall asleep, and knock her head on the table. Brilliant. Maybe she'd be able to finally knock some sense into herself…She glanced at her watch. 1 AM. Damn. Looked like she'd hadn't gotten to bed at a decent hour again, same as last night, and Monday, the weekend…ever since they'd gone and bought the scrolls, actually. Up early to read, stay up late to read some more... it was starting to break her down, a bit. The past week had been a blur. So tired...

She should get to bed. Ever since she'd gone on that fateful shopping trip, she'd been reading furiously, every waking moment spent trying to get though the rambling passages of the journal from Meiji. Sesshoumaru had been doing the same. Only, Kagome thought sourly, _he_ didn't need to sleep as much. So he'd been reading while she was sleeping. Damn him for not needing to sleep…

She was sure he hadn't even eaten yesterday, he was so intent upon finding out what had happened to the youkai just before the Meiji era. Which wasn't saying much, since she'd forgotten about dinner as well, come to think of it...or was that the day before…?

Kagome narrowly saved herself from falling asleep again, and morosely started off towards the stairs. She had to get to bed, or she'd be dead on her feet again tomorrow. She wished she could run for a week on no sleep just like Sesshoumaru seemed to be doing…. Her bitch of a supervisor had yelled for half an hour about lazy partying teenagers…or maybe it had been an hour? She couldn't remember too well…

Kagome didn't even bother undressing, just fell across her makeshift bed as though it was a lifesaver, falling asleep in mid air. She never remembered hitting the pillows, at least…

Down the hall, Sesshoumaru looked up once from his own reading, and then ignored her. So she'd finally worn herself out, had she? He swept his bangs back from his eyes, not really noticing that the page he'd been holding had fallen to the floor, forgotten. He rather admired the way she'd held up, considering how hard she'd been working. For a human to do this well was astonishing to him. But then again, Kagome was no ordinary girl, was she?

He himself was starting to feel the strain of reading for hours, days, at a time. He'd not bothered with food at all yesterday, and hadn't slept since the day they went shopping. Four…no, it was technically a new day now, since it was early morning, five days then.

Perhaps he should call it a night as well. He was no use to anyone if he couldn't focus properly. Unlike Kagome, he didn't push himself to collapse, since it served no real purpose. The work he did while tired wasn't as good as when he was a focused, wide awake razor, and there was no real pressing need to override common sense. He should have a short rest, and wake up ready to tackle the rest of the papers in the morning, much as he hated to pull himself away from the scrolls.

He blinked. That sounded right. Go to sleep, and wake up fresh. The papers wouldn't run away on him. They could wait, even if _he_ didn't want to. He reluctantly pulled himself away from Kagome's desk, and the scrolls, delicately stepping over the sorted heaps of bits of paper on the floor. They'd managed to find precious little more of use to Kagome, and nothing that _he_ was interested in. He hoped there was something that would help her to control her power, somewhere, something that would tear that damn barrier on the well apart...

He reluctantly got up and collected the soft pajamas Kagome had provided, getting ready for bed, finally burrowing underneath the warm covers. He was determined to start work again, first thing tomorrow. He settled his tail around himself, curled up comfortably. He'd find something tomorrow. He had to.

He didn't fall asleep nearly as soon as Kagome had, but it didn't take long for his soft, even breathing to fill the room.

The curtains hung limp as faded dishrags, parted on a white, evenly round moon.

1111111111

_Colours flashed, a dazzling, mad artists heap of melted pastels, blurs that resolved into faces, into wide eyes and eager mouths. He stared out across the crowd in foreign dress, a mass of human businessmen, vultures in disguise, as he was carried up to the front of the room, loathing the sharp smell of sweat lingering in the air after the laborers panting from the exertion of moving him had gone. _

_Had he been able to, he'd have happily slashed the podium, the loud announcer, and the bloated peasant's faces into bloody ribbons with great pleasure. Wouldn't **that** be a surprise? But he couldn't move, and he was tired. He tried to simply close his eyes to the endless chatter, close his eyes to the eager crowd as they craned forwards, gaping at him like putrid, wide mouthed fish. He wanted to sleep, to rip their staring faces apart, to be free to do either of those things…_

_Free. He wanted to be **free**…anything else could happen, but he just wanted out of this stony cage, too exhausted to care about anything but out._

_The edges of his vision flickered, roaring frames of black fire, dancing across the painted jester's court. Inside, he was furious with the lot of them, angry enough to finally focus on what was happening around him. He wasn't always this clear, he knew. Sometimes, he could hardly make the fuzzy world outside his mind hold still to look at. People hovered around, buzzing like soon gone insects, never stopping long enough to see. Stone didn't change, moved too slow to catch up with the living world. Stone measured time in decades._

As moonlight streamed in though the open window, Sesshoumaru turned over, mouth set in a snarl, eyes closed tightly. Poison fell onto the bedspread from his curled, rigid fingers, knotted into a fist, the small drops of green gnawing though through the sheet, hissing quietly as it went to work. His fingers twitched, then closed, the slight residue of flowery green left behind lingering in the air, a deadly florid perfume. He wanted to get at all those people gawking at him, wipe the grins from their faces. Throw green at them, slash lime light across their too white predators teeth. How **dare** they…

_He was at an auction, and it was his stony hide they were bidding on. He struggled weakly, knowing it was useless, that he wouldn't suddenly break free of this cursed scroll and emerge as himself. Not after all this time. He knew now he would never get out of this on his own. He had heard Mesau say that scroll would only stop working the day he died, unless someone on the outside dealt with it. But still! _

_How dare they shout prices at one another, how dare they look so openly, wanting to own him! Own him! As though they could ever dream of it, if they knew who he was! He would curse the one who brought him home forever! (Unless said person **freed** him. In which case it was a different tune entirely.) He wished he could vent off the anger bubbling inside by doing something, but he was forced to simper in immobility. Selling him off as though he were a slave, or furniture! Mere masonry!_

_He stopped. He was furniture, at least in their eyes, if not his own. Stone furniture. He lost track of what was happening outside him, numbed._

_Furniture._

_The auction wavered, darkening, running around him like dreamy, liquid wax in patterned pools. Useless. He barely noticed what was going on enough to privately wince as the same laborer's sweaty hands picked him up, and carried him off like the baggage he was. He didn't even know which vulture had finally bought 'him'... bought...him..._

_Stone. Would the rest of his existence be like this? Would he die not knowing freedom ever again? He'd known for a while he was growing tired, wearing down. An increased loss of attention for the outside. It could only continue till it was ended, one way or another. He knew it, but it had never sunk in so thoroughly, permeating every stony crack in his skull. _

_He was dying. And he knew it, even welcomed it. Wouldn't death be better than this?_

_A face flickered, two of them, the dark miko's figure hidden behind that of her mistress, in the shadows she belonged to, wavering with invisible angry flames. Dark assassin, Damia's pet human. And she was a pet, though she didn't know it, not like Rin had been...Rin was never a pet, she was Rin…Mesau… A hound, sent to do her mistress's dirty work. For Damia couldn't bear to sully her own fingers, her own blood covered claws. Oh no, not her, she hardly ever did anything for herself, not unless it was important…_

_She had fully intended to kill him, all those years ago. She had even given him the dubious honor of personally showing up to finish him off. She'd been enraged when she'd ended up with a statue instead of a body. He hadn't known then whether he should be pleased it had gone wrong, or afraid. He'd made up his mind fairly quickly after that. But perhaps she'd manage to polish him off yet, slower than she'd intended the way things were going. He wasn't quite sure what to make of that either. _

_The thought lingered as he was set down abruptly. He momentarily wished the laborer a violent end, preferably at his own claws, then stopped. It would get him nowhere. _

_Would that be a bad thing? Death? He was accustomed to death, and didn't really care if he was dead or not. If it meant an end to this, he might even welcome it. He would see Rin again…he wouldn't be stone, wouldn't be trapped, wouldn't be furniture, wouldn't be sold, wouldn't… Dimly, he heard the rustle of cardboard from the space behind his head._

_A box._

_They were packing him into a box. In a small, grubby cardboard **box**. No! Sesshoumaru's stony heart raced, pounding behind sealed ribs. _

_No! Nonononono…._

_Had he a voice, he'd have been shouting, clawing his way out of that room, out of the hellish square contraption easily on his way to freedom. He didn't care he was panicking, didn't care for loss of face, was just crazy enough not to care about anything but out, wasn't like anyone would see him, wasn't like he mattered, didn't care about pride anymore, not the box, not the dark, not..._

_He wanted **out**. He wanted out **now**. Why wouldn't they set him down, outside the box? Why did they have to put him in the box? **Why?**_

_Hands pulled at him, lifted him again, and he struggled wildly without managing to move a millimeter. He didn't even care about slashing open the man holding onto him anymore, just about getting out, get out outout**out**…_

_He was inside. Inside the box. A few stray bits of cotton batting rained past his granite nose and he watched in horror as the shadows lengthened, closed in on him, felt the last few strands of what passed for sanity **snap**. Closed box. He was in a closed box. _

_It was just a cardboard box...no... he was still in that room? No, he wasn't….not the cell from hell, not the walls falling in…no. He wasn't there either. He was underground, feeling the dirt falling in around him, feeling Damia shovel it on top, killing him, killing his mind, blocking the light, oh, please stop, no, no…_

_He was in that small, suffocating darkened grave, darkened pressure chamber, pushing down, crushing him, burying screams inside a stone skin and sealed lips. He wasn't even in a room, alone with the hungry earth, feeling it close around his skin, force its way into his ears, his throat, drowning in loam, in a premature grave, was he dead? **No**, he didn't want to be…_

_Sesshoumaru's fingers twitched, and he twisted underneath the covers, sweating. Had to get out…get out…get out…_

_Not again. He couldn't stand it again. He didn't want to, he couldn't, no light, no air, no freedom. Just dark. The ground, the earth of a grave, his grave, only he wasn't dead, he was seeing her hands, throwing dirt down on him, throwing madness, death at him, fear, the mind killer, bringing him, killing him, can't kill me, but oh, if only…please kill me now...Dark again, like before, just like she'd left him in the end, the earth was shaking, no it wasn't, that was just the truck, just a truck, not an earthquake, they're just in a truck, can't be, don't want to believe that, afraid of the ground moving, swallow him, had it already eaten him? Something hurt, blood in his eyes, no, it wasn't blood-smell, he was imagining it, that had been long ago when he was young, in an earthquake, the earth had growled, collapsed the walls, but not now, now there was nothing between him and the earth; Earth that was furious, lash out, kill him without a thought in rock, entombed in rock, in fear, within a stone statue, in a room, long ago, in the cupboard, in the…bound with sound, roaring, it was laughter, **her** laughter…it bounced inside him, it….echoed, it hurt, there was something…._

…_.lightened…_

_Pale_

_White_

_Blankness._

_Gradually, the blurriness in front of him resolved into painted white boards. No, bricks…grey concrete…_

_A wall. And he was just another brick. _

_He was floating, running **through** the concrete, breaking away, looking ahead toward where he could hear Rin. He was being chased, she was chasing him… He had to find Rin before Damia found him, he had to, or she would kill them both. He had to find Rin! He had to get out, or she would catch him, stop him, Mesau would kill him again, only she hadn't, she'd buried him alive, forever in the dark, within the ground, suffocating, moving earth, swallow him whole, let me out, gods…no…not again, not again…_

_The invisible tunnel echoed with his footsteps, dimming, stretching out forever before him. He had to get there in time! He had to outrun her, had to find Rin, had to! He wouldn't let her bury him alive, he wasn't dead, you only buried the dead, was he dead? Maybe he was, but he was still here! She would bury his mind, let him die the little death, I will not let my fear rule me, this is disgraceful…not the dark, the ground, the dark pit, the screams, no one will hear me, mother let me out! _

_Damia…_

_I will hate you forever, till time itself ends._

_Light, beating footsteps came closer, behind him, behind him, caught him! No! She was coming, behind him! He turned, and something slammed, frozen, he couldn't move._

_Pain spread though him, around him, stopped him, freezing him forever. Invisible ice crawled though his eyes, though his veins, worms within a grave, blinding him, binding him. caught, caged, trapped, squeezed between the deep, rumbling earth, going to be crushed, she was going to bury him alive…bury his mind, seal his heart, steal his breath, his sanity, let me die! Not ever, let me go, not again…_

_Black. Black earth. Eating him whole, drowning him, sealing him away, don't want to die in the ground, not ready, don't bury me, don't leave me, Rin? Light…need light….air! Breath! Can't breath! Rin, where are you? Where? Rin…let me out! Can't…_

_Want out, need out, can't breathe, can't feel. Want out, want to die, need out, need die, am I dead? Grass, can't smell green, gone….dead silence…(pressure. Crushing. Can't crush stone, can it? but it wants to, dirt and rock want to. Oh how it wants to…) no noise no light…nothingness…_

_There is nothing._

_Fingernails scraped across his eyes, and a slurred voice hovered near his ear. He vaguely sensed being moved, lifted, too crazed with terror to know **what** was happening. The world had shrunk to the dark behind his eyes, the world large enough for only one thing, for panicked fear..._

_Hands brushed away the darkness, but he scarcely noticed._

"_Is this…are you sure?"_

_Mother's hands. They were her hands, soft hands, soothing hands, driving away everything, though he knew, dimly, that his real mother had never done such a thing, and wouldn't even have considered it. Only his nurse had ever done so. _

_Perhaps they were her hands, then…what was her name? He didn't know, didn't know…he was only an impression of a mind, not a person with a past, only a pair of ears._

_There was someone behind him "Can't…I remember. I remember after. This…is as much as…" Was that father? It sounded much like him. Exactly like him. Was he dead? Was it ended, finally? They were both dead, weren't they? But death meant burial… Mother and father. Rin…_

_But if he was dead, then why…?_

_Silence. They were gone, leaving him behind again._

_Alone. He must not be dead, though he wished it were so. Rin…where was she? There was no reason to live, except to protect her, and if she was gone…_

'_Dead… "She's dead."_

Sesshoumaru shot up straight up in bed, lips formed around the words, shaking like a leaf, eyes wide. He panted slightly, heart still beating on overdrive, mind still shot with panicked adrenalin. The room seemed to close on him, and he jumped at the window, fumbled at the mechanism, cursing as the latch stuck. Outoutouttoutout….

Finally, it opened, and he was outside like a shot, in the cool night. Sesshoumaru breathed deeply, letting the cool air wash over him, cool away the sweat, smooth away the warm, dark terror below, forcibly controlling his breathing, trying for calm. He sat down on the roof silently, breathing the chilly night air deeply, a sailor come back from narrowly escaping drowning, gasping at the lifesaving air. Don't think, just _be_…because thinking might make it worse…

Eventually, he slowed down, and began to breath in a more normal fashion, though he wasn't really calmed in mind. Cautiously, he allowed himself to think.

It had felt so real, parts of it.

Too real. Terrifyingly real. That last memory…he shivered, then opened his eyes wide, forcing himself not to do anything but sit still. No thinking of that. He could not let this control him. He had to face it, conquer it. Fear did not rule him. He would not_ let_ it rule him. He had to look at it in the eye, and face down his fear. Sesshoumaru the proud did not run, did not quake, did not feel so mind numbingly afraid as _that._

Cautiously, he examined the memory's edges, determined to, at last, remember outside a dream. He had forced it away for so long…but it was always there, waiting to pounce in the dream world. He had to face it, master it...

He began picking at the open mental scab gingerly, almost, but not quite, too afraid to do so. He had to do this, had to… slowly, he relaxed, forcing himself to call up the memories, bracing himself to do so. Slowly, so slowly...

Eventually, he managed it. And blinked, surprised at something he had never considered before. He had blocked it away for so long... Those hands…

They were not mother's. But they had been _real_. Nor yet his nurse's, dead long before. No, they had been real...but who…? It had always seemed familiar, more so now, though he couldn't remember who it was. That smell, airy, light scent of….

Kagome.

He realized with a shock that the unknown woman had been Kagome, pulling him out from where Damia had left him, buried under the ground… She had saved him not once, but twice. But that wasn't right…it couldn't... until he remembered the voice.

Himself.

He must have been hearing himself. He had considered before, when he got back, that he might try to free his past self. It hadn't really made much sense, that memory, otherwise. He knew he didn't remember it well, but if that had really been her, then he must have done it, sometime. He had always thought it was a delusion, a dream, a hint of madness. How could he think he was seeing himself, or even his father, let alone an unknown, vaguely familiar female presence? But he must have pulled himself free…he'd finally realized who had saved him. Or at least, who he_ thought _had. It couldn't be her…he couldn't trust the memory, it was too fractured, too unreliable.

He closed his eyes. He might have saved himself from being buried alive, in a way, but he _also_ remembered a long series of events after, culminating in that concrete room. He might have been saved from the ground, but he's still waited out the years as a statue, an imprisonment almost as bad as that first one. Time travel was odd enough as it was, and it hurt to think about the quantum ripples too much, but if he'd really remembered what he thought he had, then he…

He snorted. It couldn't be real, because he'd never bring Kagome along on such a venture. He'd admit to a certain affection for her over the past few weeks, justified in his mind by the fact that she'd freed him from Damia's cursed scrolls and helped him so much (even though he'd have preferred not to need help, and didn't want it), but that did not extend to such a personal journey. The memory must be false after all. Or at least, that part of it…he knew all too well that the rest had happened. But the rest…? He would never even _consider_ letting her get that close to him. That was dangerous…a dangerous train of thought…

Sesshoumaru realized he had slowly begun to let her inside the defenses he'd built, he realized now, and hadn't even known it! The idea was scary.

He'd worry about that later. Sesshoumaru laid back on the cool shingles, forcing himself to examine the new information. He had to do it now, or he'd never bring himself to do so. Get back on the horse. He had to do it.

He'd never particularly liked small rooms, dating from the time his darling mother had decided to lock him in a closet as punishment, and he'd been left there during an earthquake. He remembered with shame how he'd screamed and fought not to be put in that little room the next time she'd been displeased. Even for a young youkai barely out of infancy, such a display was profoundly embarrassing, more so for the heir of the west.

He had been sure nobody really knew how deep that child's fear ran. But obviously, Damia had known enough to use it. Perhaps she too remembered how crazy he'd gone when mother tried putting him in that frightening little room, or his slight aversion to small spaces, carefully hidden. He didn't know. But he did know that fear was worse than it had been before she fed it on a diet of death. She hadn't helped matters any when she'd decided to bury him alive, smirking all the while. Bitch. Run off like the damn dog she was to bury the evidence.

He hated that smile, loathed it intensely, and he wanted to be the one to claw it off her face. Slowly. Soon. He would get her back if it killed him, for doing that. For standing and watching, for gloating as her pet miko shoveled the dirt over him, onto him, for deciding to kill his mind by inches.

She'd known he was there, watching. Mesau had said it herself, when everything backfired. She'd said it wasn't a seal in the normal sense of the word, that he_ might_ still be there, watching them, captured behind stone. She had been trying to kill him, but if that failed, then the next best thing…destroy his mind, and leave him to rot in some nice, out of the way space. Even if he ever emerged, it would be as a shattered ruin. Well, she was wrong…

Mesau had also said he'd die, if her scroll had only managed to seal him like that, with his mind and senses intact, the scroll slowly draining his life away till there was nothing left but death, but that didn't concern him. He'd been too wrapped up in Damia's evil, perfect smile, the one that always meant trouble, even when she was a child.

She'd known exactly how to hurt him. She'd taken Rin, killed her, sent her damned miko to assassinate her in the garden, to leave her body for him. She claimed it was because a youkai lord having a pet (Rin was no 'pet!') was an affront in these darkening times. Rubbish. She'd stood behind him and whispered that very thing, when she'd attacked him from behind. She'd smiled that predatory smile, and then told her _own_ 'pet' human (hypocrite!) calmly to "bury the stone bastard in a hole." She knew exactly where to wound him.

And why shouldn't she? She knew him better than anyone else in his extended family. An honored general, who was his cousin, after all, who'd known him when they were both children... She must have been planning this for years…

He stopped. He was avoiding thinking about going back inside, into the stuffy bedroom he'd come out of.

He took a deep breath, and decided to go back inside. He had to, sometime. So. He would do it, and try to forget this weakness. For that's what it was. A weakness. One that had already been used against him, one he hadn't armored himself against.

A Taiyoukai should not be shaking like this after a dream, or after remembering certain events, however horrible. He was supposed to be ice, a mask. He had always been a mask...

He was a disgrace.

He purposefully slipped into the room, looking longingly at the enormous tree not too far away, unable to stop himself from sneaking a glance. It was nice out there, cool and breezy, not stuffy and closed in….

He was being ridiculous.

The damn papers were still waiting for him. He would start reading though them again. He'd been plowing through them for days by now, and still no closer to finding something of value. He had to do something, distract himself somehow. That should serve well enough.

He needed to find out what had happened to make his entire race just…vanish. The answer had to be in there. It had to be. Just like the answer to the more immediate problem of returning home had to be there. He didn't know what he'd do if it wasn't. He had to focus on that. Not anything else. Forget the cold soil. Forget the pressure, the sun dying behind the dirt, the…

Sesshoumaru's hand curled itself into an angry fist. He would get Damia for this if it took him a thousand years to hunt her down! For Rin, for himself. He would prove himself. He had to prove he wasn't….wasn't what? Scared of the dark, like some silly child? He wasn't. He'd _prove_ it.

Sesshoumaru slipped back inside and closed the window, ignoring the suddenly oppressive atmosphere, _forcing_ himself not to take great lungful's of air, feeling like he was suffocating. _Self-discipline_.

He pulled a paper towards himself, not really reading the messy writing. Something about that dream bothered him beyond the obvious terror.

If that dream, that foggy memory was right, he had to come back. There was a memory of himself, freeing his past self, confusing as that thought was. With Kagome, though he was pretty certain _that_ was wrong. Even if she'd gotten under his skin, grown to be a part of his life, he wouldn't… He had to come back, because he already had, if that made any sense. It made his head spin thinking about it.

In a way, that was a good thing. It meant they would get back, if it was a true memory. He wasn't sure it was. How could Kagome possibly be there?

He shrugged. Oh well. This wasn't getting him any closer to home. Just because he possibly remembered he'd make it, it didn't stop the work. If anything, it meant more work on his part to ensure his predictions came true.

Sesshoumaru curled up on the bed on one side, wrapping his tail around him as he smoothed down what seemed to be the millionth piece of old paper , flattening the sheets and skimming over the writing, pouring over it, trying to ignore the thick air of the room as best he could.

He pulled out a CD labeled 'Simon and Garfunkel, featuring …' and firmly resolved to focus on the papers.

Not on dirt raining into his eyes, and not on antique shows. Not on Damia or Kagome.

Just the papers. Just the damn papers….

1111111111111111111111111111

Kagome was roughly shaken out of her deep sleep by a clawed hand on her shoulder. She groaned, and turned over. "Leave me _alone_…" What could Inuyasha possibly want this time? It was too early…Shikon shards could wait…

"Get up."

"No." Kagome huddled down into her sleeping bag, surprised at how soft it seemed. They must have found a nice camping spot last night…she couldn't remember…

Sesshoumaru sighed. Lazy…he wanted her to wake up so he could show her what he'd found last night. Even if she was probably tired, this was more important… He glanced out the window, and grimaced. The sun was just up. Kagome should be up too.

Well, if she wouldn't get up when he wanted her to…

Sesshoumaru hooked his fingers into the covers, and pulled them off the bed in one quick jerk. The comforter, the sheets, and Kagome all came tumbling off the bed with a rather satisfying thump and a yelp. He stood and watched as Kagome fought her way free of the sheets, dazed expression on her face.

"Sit!! Oh…shit…" Kagome massaged the bump on her head, staring at Sesshoumaru in dismay. For a moment, she'd been so sure it was the feudal era. So sure…

She crossed her arms and glared up at him from the pile of sheets. She wouldn't show him how upset she was. She'd been so _sure_…"_What _is so important that you have to wake me up like that?" She narrowed her eyes ferociously. "This had better be damn good." She looked at her watch. It felt a lot earlier than 5 am.

Sesshoumaru held up the two pages he'd come across. "These." He handed them to her to read. "I'm sure you can see their value."

Kagome took the pages wordlessly. If this was a way home, she might consider forgiving him.

Maybe.

_ "Some of the swords forged by the master youkai smiths were said to be enhanced when used with Miko powers. It is said that once, a miko and a youkai felled a thousand opponents in one swing, when she placed her hands on the blade. One doesn't credit such things, but Amiritsu has heard the stories. It might just be true. After all, the younger generation today hardly believes in youkai, but I know they exist. I saw a bird youkai, once, when I was small. Perhaps this was real, at one time, though we do not believe it now… Amiritsu claims to have seen many youkai from before as well..."_

The rest of the page rambled on, but didn't include anything of value to them. Kagome put the first page down, and flipped to the next, cursing the writer's sloppy brush strokes.

"…_the Shikon no tama has many legends surrounding it. It was used by youkai to increase their power, or the power of youkai weapons, and said to be able to heal any wounds. It was also said that anything created with the aid of the Shikon, could only be destroyed with it. _

_I have heard that it was shattered, that it was stolen, that it was made from four battling souls. Actually, I doubt it exists, but again, my good friend Amiritsu has more knowledge of this than I. In fact, she…."_

Kagome set the paper down. "You know, I wish this Amiritsu person was actually the one writing this down. She seems to know everything about everything, according to our grammatically challenged friend Jinoue …" Kagome sighed. "Oh well. I can see why you woke me up." She grimaced as she realized that this was when her alarm normally went off, but she'd forgotten to turn it on. She'd been too tired last night. So she actually owed Sesshoumaru for getting her up…

Not that she'd tell him, of course.

She pulled out the Shikon from its place around her neck, where it always hung. "No wonder I couldn't do anything! I think I might have used this to help me seal the well. I don't remember clearly, but I think I _did_ use it as a power source..." She tucked the jewel back under her T-shirt.

"_I _was more interested in the sword. Perhaps, if you were to keep hold of Tetsusaiga's hilt …" Sesshoumaru looked slightly disgusted at the thought of wielding the Tetsusaiga with Kagome's help. But if it worked…

"That might do it. But you need the Shikon to make it all work." Kagome pulled herself up, using the bed to held her up. She felt like crap, but she was wide awake by now. She glanced at her watch. She had to be at work in an hour…

Screw work. This was more important.

"Place it on the hilt then. If you did use it while making that barrier, then we will need the Shikon to destroy it." So she'd used the jewel, had she? It explained a great deal. A good thing it had mentioned both that and the bit about the weapons at the same time, or she might never have known till Kagome got around to reading it. Which could be another week, at the rate she went…

"Alright. Give me a second to get dressed, and we'll go out there. I'll help you with the sword, you try and break it… It might work!" Kagome danced on the spot, grinning wildly. "Shoo! I need to get dressed!" She shoved the door closed as Sesshoumaru left, practically skipping to the pile of clothing at the foot of her bed, humming contentedly to the music Sesshoumaru had turned on in his room.

"_I won't disturb the slumber of feelings that have died. If I never loved I never would have cried. I am a rock, I am an islaaand…... And a rock feels no pain, And an island never cries…"_

Kagome made a face as she realized what English song she was humming along to. "Hah. Depressing song…I wonder where he found that CD?" She'd lost it quite a while ago…

It was forgotten as soon as she'd thought of it. Kagome opened the door to her temporary room, and hopped down the hall on one foot, struggling to put on her socks. She caught her balance on the door frame of her old room, and rushed to the closet. She grabbed Tetsusaiga, and unsheathed its battered length. She turned around and made for the well at a sprint, not bothering to check to see if Sesshoumaru was following her or not. She knew he would.

She paused at the entrance to the well house, panting slightly from the sprint. She fumbled for the Shikon, and carefully tucked it into the messy wrappings on the hilt. "There." She moved the sword to one hand, holding it out for Sesshoumaru. "I'll keep hold of it, alright? That way, the stupid sword's barrier might just let you use it…" She'd nearly forgotten about that inconvenience till now. But maybe this would work. It had to!!

Sesshoumaru eyed the proffered sword warily. He hoped this worked as well. He'd never thought of asking her to hold onto it at the same time till she mentioned it. It just wasn't his first instinct to think of a human as beneficial. Slowly, he put out his hand and grasped the hilt below where her smaller hand strained with the weight. He braced himself unobtrusively for a nasty shock. If this didn't work, he was going to end up with another set of singed fingers…

Nothing happened.

He looked down at the sword, pleasantly surprised. One eyebrow rose up into his pale bangs. He hadn't actually thought it would_ work_…

The ghost of a smile crossed his lips as the sword transformed. He didn't care how it worked, only that it did. He momentarily let go, and led the way down the narrow steps, Kagome bouncing along excitedly behind him, dragging the sword until he reached for it again, just before entering the mini shrine.

"It worked! It really worked! Haha! Yes!" Kagome grinned widely, positioning herself out of the way. "Lets kick some barrier ass!" She felt giddy, not caring that she was setting herself up for a huge disappointment if this attempt failed as the others had. They'd at least accomplished something, figuring out how to use Tetsusaiga!

Sesshoumaru ignored the capering madwoman, and narrowed his eyes at the well, leveling the sword at the barrier. Kagome staggered a little, overbalancing as he moved it beyond the reach of her shorter arms, letting go in surprise.

As soon as her hand left the hilt, fire shot up his arm, making it painfully clear the sword only accepted him for Kagome's sake. He dropped it with a muffled hiss. It clattered onto the floor, nothing but an ordinary, nicked blade again. A blade he couldn't even hold without her…_assistance_.

Kagome grimaced, and picked it up. "Guess it still doesn't like you." She sighed. "Please don't do that…my arms are a lot shorter than yours." That would be his fault for making her let go. Silly Sess…

Sesshoumaru said nothing, simply grasping the hilt again after she'd picked it up, and drawing back the sword, focusing hard. It was his own fault for failing to take her smaller arms into account, and so he now had burnt fingers. Perfect.

Red shimmers dripped down the transformed blade, glinting as they spread to cover the entire fang. He needed to cut…

…there.

Wind blasted out of nowhere as he swung Tetsusaiga, howling into the barrier, splashing round it in waves. The sword grew white, pulsing power streaming out from where Kagome held on tightly. The barrier glowed a brilliant purple, repelling the wind, until the blindingly colored sword touched it, a clash of rainbows, purple and gold-white and blue all mixed together...

The Shikon in the hilt flashed, sending afterimages dancing across both people's visions; the barrier popped like a soap bubble, sending droplets of fading spiritual power and youki in every direction.

Sesshoumaru stared at the well. He blinked.

'_How could it be that simple?'_

All that work for nothing! All it took was some silly human jewel, and a proper sword, and it just went _pop_! Poof! Vanished! Kagome grinned.

Sesshoumaru smiled, a rare, true smile.

So what if it was terribly anticlimactic? It had **_vanished_**. The way home was _clear_!

The scent of salt behind him prompted Sesshoumaru turn around, to where Kagome had crouched down, crying. He hurriedly dropped the sword just before she let go herself, and looked down.

Why was she doing that? He wished she'd stop. Why start weeping? She'd done it. They'd opened the well. So why…? He felt uncomfortable, watching her. She shouldn't be crying…he didn't like to see her upset….why was…?

"Stop that."

Kagome smiled up though damp lashes. "I'm sor…sorry. I just…finally…it's open. I can go home…" She sniffed, and wiped at her eyes. "It's been so long…"

Sesshoumaru sighed. "Isn't this time your home?"

"Well, yes, but…" Kagome's eyes grew wide. _Time_…"Shit!" She had to get to work! She had to tell her supervisor she was going to be gone, and give that last paycheck to mom! She had to work today, or she wouldn't get enough for…

She grinned. If she could get her hands on enough 'antiques', she'd be rich! Urahara would buy them all off her for a pretty good price.

But, she still had to tell the museum she was quitting. And by now, she'd missed her bus. Arg…Mom was at work too, and Souta had already left for school…Grandpa was sleeping, and anyway, he couldn't drive, he wasn't able to…

Sesshoumaru was puzzled. What was wrong? Kagome looked like something bad had just occurred to her. "What?"

"Oh…it's not really important…I missed my bus to get to work." Her stomach growled. "And I'm hungry."

"You're worried about this work _now_?"

"Well, yes. I have to tell them I'm quitting, or they'll wonder what happened to me. But I'm not looking forward to telling them I'm leaving when I know I'll get there late today…"

"Where is it you work?" The faster she got there, the faster they could both get back where they belonged. Sesshoumaru wanted her to tell him exactly how this well worked, when they went through it. And getting Kagome to work seemed the fair thing to do.

Also, now that he thought about it, he could use her help in other ways. Damia had her own pet miko. If Kagome were trained, she might be able to counter Mesau's dark powers.

_If_ she were trained…that was the catch…but…wait…why Kagome?

She had all the training of one of Souta's exploding missiles in his many 'games'. He shook his head slightly. No, he couldn't afford to have her help, even if some treacherous part of his mind disagreed. He was already in her debt enough as it was. He didn't need to be any further involved. She couldn't be allowed to botch his plans in any way. Half trained, or no training whatsoever, was unacceptable. Kagome shouldn't be allowed to get that close. She was already uncomfortably familiar with him, as he'd realized only last night. He had to push her away, not invite her in. So why…?

"I work at a museum…why?" Kagome looked at him suspiciously. Why did he care?

"Then I will get you there, on time." The less they had to worry about details, the better. He'd get her there after breakfast. He grimaced as he realized he'd need to wear that damn illusionary necklace. _Again_.

It wasn't comfortable, but it had its uses. _Nobody_ looking for Sesshoumaru would expect him to masquerade as a human. He wouldn't have believed it himself, once upon a time...

Perhaps he should bring it home with him. It would probably prove invaluable, if the illusion spell was good enough to cover his scent, and youkai energy. Probably it was, because he had been the one to generate the image, and he had covered that. He had not only imagined a human visage, but a human scent, and an absence of power, anything to mar the mask. He doubted a human would think to cover smells…and he didn't want to just throw it away; Kagome had worked so hard making it for him…

He could sit and watch enemy movements with them none the wiser. Unless the Purists wanted to go 'human Sesshoumaru' hunting…

"Really?" Kagome stared at him. She'd never expected him to say that. But it was rather nice of him. She grinned. Maybe he wouldn't be such a pain, after this.

"Yes. After I eat something." Sesshoumaru turned around and got out of the tiny well house, stomach reminding him that he'd skipped several meals for the past few days. Helping her get to work seemed the honorable thing to do.

Kagome hurriedly finished brushing her teeth, threw a few things into the worn yellow backpack for later, and raced down the stairs, snatching her bagged lunch up along the way. She finished scribbling a quick note to her mom outlining exactly what had happened, and saying she'd be back after school tomorrow, Friday. She checked to see that her bus pass was there for the ride home, and then grinned at a black haired Sesshoumaru.

He'd remembered the necklace, even if he hadn't bothered with jeans. Oh well. Enough people wore more traditional clothing that it didn't really matter.

"How are we getting there?" She was curious as to how he was going to get there. Wasn't he able to fly? Or was he just going to jump tall buildings with a single bound? It would certainly be an interesting ride to work, if he pulled a superman stunt…

"The rooftops. As long as you know which direction to go." That was the only hitch. He had to get the directions from her.

"Pretty much straight east. It looks like an old temple from the outside. There's a parking lot in the back that nobody uses. We could go there."

"Fine." Sesshoumaru moved his hair off his back, out of the way. Bad enough he'd get Kagome's scent all over him without her pulling on his hair... Not that she smelled, bad, of course. She was actually rather pleasant to have around, in a way. It was just the principle…he was trying to make sure she didn't get any closer, wasn't he? And he didn't want her pulling his hair, even by accident.

He stepped out the front door, and turned to face Kagome. He'd seen his brother carry her around on his back, and it seemed to be the most sensible way to do this. If he simply took her hand, she might lose her arm, and he was not going to carry her bridal style even if he had _both_ arms. Which left giving her an awkward piggyback ride. "I believe Inuyasha carried you on his back?"

Kagome nodded, slightly nervous. "Alright…" She gingerly climbed aboard, blinking as an invisible tail steadied her, making up for the loss of an arm. Illusions were weird…feeling things that didn't look like they were there… The tail curled around her waist, making sure she would not fall off. She grinned, and dared to give into temptation just a little, hesitantly putting a hand out for 'balance' against the thick white fur. So soft…!

Sesshoumaru took off, jumping down to the street below and then to the rooftops. Kagome watched nervously, remembering all the times Inuyasha had given her a lift. Sesshoumaru jumped further, and a lot more smoothly than his brother, but it was enough like being with Inuyasha again that she felt a pang of sadness.

Distantly, she wondered what Inuyasha would have said if he could see her now…probably it would contain several sentences worth of 'what were you thinking?!' interspersed with swearing.

She missed him…

Kagome wondered, once again, what Inuyasha would have thought of this odd state of affairs. But in the end, she had chosen to help the living, and leave the dead in peace. Inuyasha had wanted to choose someone else, and death, over her. Kagome knew with her heart that helping Sesshoumaru was the right thing to do, and, for the most part, events had left her life so busy recently that she didn't have time to mope, and wonder. It felt, at times, as though she betrayed Inuyasha's memory, but at others, she knew she could not have left Sesshoumaru alone. That would have haunted her more surely than Inuyasha, in years to come. To _not_ do something when she could have...

It was important to save the living, and to remember the dead, but not to let them haunt you. Kagome had felt haunted for a year, the whole time she'd been with Hojo. She had decided that Inuyasha would not stop her from living live with another if she wanted to.

She'd chosen to go forwards at last, Kagome realized. She wanted to say goodbye. She was ready, now. Sometime in the last week, without her even realizing, she had found it was time to say goodbye, and to accept that Inuyasha had left on the long journey from which there was no return.

She stopped daydreaming as a voice intruded, asking politely for directions. She told Sesshoumaru where to go, and in no time at all they were both standing in the parking lot, with only a few stray cars for company.

Kagome glanced at her watch. Ten minutes early. Wow. "Thank you, Sesshoumaru."

He didn't acknowledge her thanks. "I will be waiting. As soon as you get back, we go."

Finally. Home…

Kagome grinned happily. "Yes!" As Sesshoumaru turned to leave, she called back after him playfully "Go straight back to the shrine, please! I don't need to hear news that there's a giant dog fighting with Godzilla or something when I get home!"

As Sesshoumaru vanished over the rooftops, headed for the shrine, he briefly wondered who Godzilla was, (A youkai? Unlikely…) before turning his mind over to the single, all important fact that he would soon be _home_…

* * *

_There. The plot-ball once again begins rolling with serious intent. (Wonder if anybody recognizes my shameless filching of songs? - I own nothing musical in this fic, by the way, for any of you who are lawyers out there.) Lol. Lots happened this chapter…kinda long, but I didn't want to break it up. And as I've yet to hear anyone complain about chapter length…hehe. More on Sesshoumaru, (hopefully it's not too OOC; I added my own things to his character for a reason…which will become clear…later.) and a rather odd dream sequence… (confesses that those are hella fun to write)_

_Bah. I should stop worrying now; I wrote it, it was fun, and hopefully other people like it too. If not…well…I'll probably survive as long as nobody (who has training – ever tried to use nunchucks without knowing how? Interesting experience.) comes after me with said nunchucks. _

_Thank you to everyone who reviewed last chapter, by the way! I appreciate the feedback, and the lovely comments! (big grin)_


	18. ch17:Home

**:: Home ::**

Kagome leaned against the wall of the bus, feeling the heater's hot leathery breath whoosh out from some unidentified source near the floor.

Home. Nearly home. She just had to get back to the shrine, then she could go back home. A grin spread across her face, covering it in a beaming, glowing smile. She'd told the museum she was quitting, and while they'd grumbled, they hadn't really cared to pry into why she'd given such short notice. Wasn't two weeks the usual amount of time you had to give? She didn't know, and didn't care.

Oddly enough, a notice had turned up, dated to two weeks ago, telling them she was leaving. Nobody had opened it, or noticed it till just this morning. Most curious. She was sure Chihero had something to do with it, but hadn't asked. The older woman was a good friend to have. She'd have to bring her something, try and keep at least one of the friendships she had in the present. It had all been worked out. She was going to be 'gone indefinitely, and unavailable'. She'd said she was headed to America. That would explain the extended absence.

Speaking of friends…Kagome dug out the family cell phone, and flipped open the top to reveal an LCD screen that blinked sleepily. She hardly ever used it, and she could just as easily call Hojo once she got home, but she had waited too long for this. She'd talk to him on the half hour bus ride, then be off to the past as soon as she got off at her own stop.

She dialed the number, feeling extravagant. She wondered how much this would cost, then dismissed it. The cell phone was on a pay by call plan anyway, and she hadn't used it lately. A little extravagance and celebration was in order. As was telling Hojo she was leaving. He deserved to know that much, now he was in on her secret.

Hojo's number flashed and winked as the tone came on, ringing. She held the cell up to talk into, feeling like some businessperson, always on a cell with other important people.

111111111111111

"Moshi moshi! Hojo speaking." Hojo leaned back on his couch, toying with a piece of pizza as he picked up.

"Hi Hojo! It's Kagome…listen. I thought I should tell you I was going."

"Going where?" Hojo yawned, sounding tired over the wireless contraption.

"Guess. A long trip, camping supplies, and no phone service!" Kagome couldn't contain the excitement in her voice.

"You mean…you figured out how to go back?" Hojo was surprised, and happy for her.

"Yes! I'm going there in…15 minutes!"

"Really? That…that's wonderful! I wish I could go…" Wonderful….he wasn't sure that was quite the word for it. But…

"I won't go long. I haven't packed for a long trip, yet. I could **try** bringing you across for a short visit, maybe…" Kagome broke off, not sure about the idea.

The one time Shippo had tried to get though, he hadn't made it. That had been when he was on his own, without her. Perhaps if she'd tried taking him with her, he might have made it…they'd just never tried.

And then there was Yura, and her hair. That had come through easily, but it wasn't a person, it was a thing, and she'd had the Shikon shards at the time.

And Inuyasha…he had always been able to go time hopping as he wished.

The well was fairly arbitrary about what it let through, so far as she knew.

"Really? I would love to, sometime. Not now though. Finals are coming up, and I have those to worry about."

Kagome laughed. "I managed to go there and study at the same time. Sort of…"

"I know, which is why_ I'm_ not going to try it." She could hear the laughter in his voice, and had to grin back. Yes, her own example was …maybe not a good one.

Kagome watched the window, eyes crinkling in delight as the vehicle she was perched in whizzed past Urahara's shop. She had to go there soon, with a whole bunch of antique things to sell him. The shrine would be looked after... Plus, her street was the next one.

"Ah…my stop is here, Hojo. I'll try and call you later sometime, aright? I have someplace to be."

Kagome half listened to his goodbye, and snapped the phone shut, still grinning like a maniac.

1111111

Hojo stared at the phone in his hand, feeling empty. She had been so happy to leave. She'd never been that happy for him. Never.

It was all about the past. Or at least, the distant past, and not the more recent one he'd become in her eyes. He was something over and done with, now, and it suddenly came home to him.

Kagome wasn't his girl…had never been his girl…he looked at the half eaten pizza in the box on the table, and sat down with it morosely.

She had been right. It would never have worked. He just hadn't really _believed_ it till now…

111111111111111111

Sesshoumaru perched on the roof, eyes fixed alternately on the street so far below, and on the well house in front of him.

He'd spent the morning trying to read more of the old scrolls, but hadn't gotten far. As the day wore on, his attention span disintegrated, wearing down until he gave up in disgust and finally quit the room, getting ready to return from the future.

Then, he'd come out here to watch for Kagome, bringing everything he'd need, or thought he'd need, with him. The necklace to conceal him while scouting, his swords and armor. He wore his favorite new articles of clothing, the red, blue and white hakama and the gi he'd picked out, with armor. The rest of his clothes (_not_ including the jeans) were neatly folded at his feet, in the simple canvas bag he'd been offered. For a moment he wished his old clothes were here, but sighed They'd fallen to pieces, basically... no help for it but to toss them.

When would she get back?

He lightly touched the hilt of Toukijin, and then Tenseiga. He had decided, at least for now, not to take Inuyasha's sword with him. He couldn't use it, and he did not want to deprive Kagome of it just yet. He'd sensed how important it was to her somehow, and it wasn't going anywhere. He could leave it without worries, and get it later.

If Souta didn't try to borrow it…

He'd had to deal with innumerable 'Can I borrow...? Can I wear? Can I…?' statements while he was getting ready to leave. Idiot human boy. He probably didn't know how much the armor _weighed_. Souta would hardly be able to stand if he was to wear it, not to mention that he'd look ridiculous…

Then, there was the simple fact that Sesshoumaru _wasn't_ going to lend him anything, give him anything, or say anything other than 'Get out'. He was firmly convinced that 'Souta' was actually a synonym for 'nuisance'.

He wondered how much longer he would have to wait for Kagome to show up. Couldn't he just go on his own…? No, he wanted her to explain this, and wanted her present so nothing unexpected would happen. Besides, what if he needed her around to actually operate the thing? He grimaced. No, better to wait.

He wasn't quite sure what he would find on the other side. He had to discover what had gone on in his absence before he could even begin planning how to get at Damia, or rather, at Mesau. He'd probably have to go through her before he could even _touch_ Damia. Should he try planning ways to take out Damia, or would he have to contact others? If he couldn't get close on his own…

It all depended on what awaited. For one thing, was she ruling in his place now? Had all his other generals fallen in behind her? The rest of the family? What was she doing? Had the North finally given in and supported her, or the East…? Had the South gone to war, yet? He'd long known her ideas were quite different than from his own, but he hadn't really been paying much attention when she'd explained what she thought he should do. He knew she favored the Purists faction, but that was about it. The Purists were absolute idiots…

So was he, for being so blind. Sesshoumaru wa baka desuyo…

The way he saw things, there were two immediate things he could do. Go back home and scout around, leaving the vicinity of the well, or go back and be within range of return. Probably the second, since he still wanted to finish reading the scrolls, and he'd left them here. They were Kagome's, not his. He also recognized the strategic importance of having a place to retreat to where enemies could not follow.

At least, he_ assumed _they couldn't follow…he didn't really know. But even if they did, they'd have to come at him one on one, perhaps two. The well would only permit a few to pass though it at once.

And if the well needed the Shikon, or Kagome, or both to make it work, then he would do quite well to stay in the vicinity of such a secure hideout.

His face twitched slightly. He hated having to fight in the shadows. Guerrilla fighting was something he hadn't needed to do in a long, long time.

But then again, he didn't have much dignity left, at this point. Not after spending nearly two weeks in a human's house as an honored guest, not after being so silly about what had happened to him. He wasn't supposed to let anything bother him. Sesshoumaru firmly shut down that line of thought before it began to unravel, a feat easier in the light of day than in the witching hours. Too close to the deep, primordial night of underground.

But it did bother him, and therefore, he was a failure as a Taiyoukai. _Former_, Taiyoukai. He'd also failed at ruling, hadn't he…?

He grinned bleakly. At least he hadn't failed in breaking the barrier. He'd done that much, with Kagome's help.

But the real reason he allowed himself to sink so low was quite obvious to him.

Revenge.

He didn't care that she'd stolen his lands out from under him, not when set against the rest of her crimes, but for killing, murdering Rin in such a cruel way, for sending _him_ to hell and back…nothing less than her head on a pole and her blood on his claws would do. Damia, and whoever had been foolish enough to follow her. Family or former friend, it didn't matter. _Damia_ was family, one of his cousins, and he certainly wasn't going to let that relationship stand in the way! He'd kill her, or die in the attempt.

It didn't hurt that she was in league with the Purists, a vein of political thought nearly as unpleasant as its opposite number, the Fellowship. The Purists hated humans, and wanted to wipe them, especially the newcomers, into the sea. Individual factions had sprung up, each with their own ideas on how and to what degree to do this, but they all agreed something must be done.

The Fellowship, on the other hand, thought they should cozy up to humans, almost to the point of being trod upon, again with different points of view and factions within the movement. But both were disastrous if taken too far, in his mind.

That was why he had stood on the fence for so long, him and the other Taiyoukai. He'd felt there had to be a different way to cope with the new humans, and the small increase in youkai immigration from the mainland. By doing this, Damia had pushed everything out of balance, and her methods for doing so…

Damia's blood, and her pet miko. They had made some sort of pact together, so they could _die_ together.

He let some of the corrosive poison hidden in his fingers emerge, watched it fall slowly to the roof tiles, spitting. He was looking forwards to the day Damia's face did the same…

The green acid began to make a hole in the shingles, and he blinked at it, realizing what he'd done. Shit…

Now he owed the Higurashi family a few shingles as well as sheets…how lovely…

He sighed in faint relief that nothing had been discovered, yet. He'd just bundled everything into the laundry and hoped nobody saw.

He balled his hand into a fist, and got a hold of himself. It had been rather hard to keep himself under control of late, and he wasn't quite sure why. Was it what Damia had done, still simmering beneath the surface? The image of a black rimmed face, messy beauty, pushed aside the perfect blued ice of Damia. Kagome. Had living with humans warped his judgment? She'd broken down the barriers he had, but not all of them, not yet. And he wasn't going to let her closer.

Just because it was more difficult to maintain an eerie calm did not mean he should _not_ maintain it. It just meant he needed to work harder.

He watched the well house intently, and then slowly turned to look at the street. Nothing. He looked back at the well house again.

Still nothing. Sesshoumaru stood up, and vanished into Kagome's room to pace. Damit…what was taking Kagome so long? He wanted to get going!

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Kagome flew off the bus, barely noticing the steps disappearing beneath her feet. She jerked open the front door, and ran face first into something that clanged metallically, hitting it hard.

She bounced back onto the floor, and blinked in surprise, staring up at black enameled armor. Sesshoumaru stared back down at her, unimpressed.

"Slow." Was the only word he said, watching her pick herself up off the floor.

Kagome didn't care, for once. She was too happy to be going home. "I am not that slow! Just let me grab my trusty old backpack, and off we go!"

Exactly the words he'd wanted to hear. He watched her snatch the bag from her temporary room, packed and ready to go, and then kept up easily as she ran across to the well house.

He supposed she could have her room back, finally. He wasn't going to need it soon. At least, he hoped he wouldn't. Not unless something went very wrong indeed…

Kagome paused at the lip of the old well, and glanced down, then back at him. "Ready?" She was more than ready. She'd waited a year for this moment.

"Ready." He allowed himself a small smile.

Kagome put out her hand, and without thinking, he took it. Together, they paused, and faced the well, side by side.

And then… They jumped down the rabbit hole together.

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Kagome straightened up, grinning, looking at the patch of blue sky at the end of the time tunnel with excitement. Sesshoumaru let go of her fingers, and jumped out of the well. She was forced to climb up the vines that still dangled down, relishing the familiar journey.

It had been a year since she'd done this. A whole _year_…it felt so good to be back!

She tumbled over the lip of the well, and stood up, looking at the huge trees surrounding the well, at the coarse, un-manicured grass underfoot, and in the distance…_his_ tree. The goshinboku where she had fist met Inuyasha.

She was too happy to let the memories of then cloud the now, not here, not today. Not when she would soon be at Kaede's home, laughing with Sango and Miroku, exclaiming over how much Shippo had grown. (Had he been spoiled too much? Had he behaved?)

For now, just being here was enough.

She watched, face lit up, as Sesshoumaru took in the forest. She wondered what he was thinking as he stood there, taking in everything for a long moment.

Sesshoumaru closed his eyes briefly, and just let the sun soak into his bones. He didn't think, just _was_. He took a deep breath, relishing in the scents of home, of the lesser youkai he could feel not far off, in last nights rain on the leaves. And the sun! Bright light against the new growth of spring, not dulled by sooty clouds but familiar, long missed gold.

He stood and let it penetrate that he was really, truly home, making sure not to give into treacherous impulse and let a smile as wide as Kagome's spread onto his face. That would never do.

He'd finally succeeded in getting back. He hadn't failed after all, but not much more could be said. Success, but not excellence. He should have been home a week ago.

And beneath it all, he knew this was only the beginning. Once he discovered what had happened in his absence, then he could make plans. Not until then. Till then, he would remain close to Kagome. After…well. He would distance himself again. Taiyoukai were detached, aloof. Human, and youkai, were separate, particularly human miko and youkai. He'd leave, even if, in a corner of his heart, he found such a prospect somehow…empty.

But that was for later. Now, Sesshoumaru began to work on the immediate problem. Information. Was Damia in with the Purists? What group was she with, if she had relied on support for her little coup? What were she and Mesau up to? How strong was she? Strong enough for him to take…or not?

Quite aside from hating her intensely at this point, he could see what would happen if she pushed the balance of power too far to one side. If she were indeed to put Purists in power, there would be absolute carnage. The Purist's fondest wish was to set out to kill the mortals, get rid of these newcomers with their guns, and their strange, foreign god._ All_ of them wanted the newcomers gone. They just differed as to whether more dead humans would follow after, and how many.

Humans were killing the youkai off slowly…unless the youkai struck first. But such an action would lead to the humans retaliating, the youkai factions fighting each other…civil anarchy among both races, if she took it far enough.

Damia had been right about him sitting on the fence. He'd chosen that path, along with the other leaders, because they couldn't see a solution on either extreme. For a number of years the issue had been an uneasy truce. But now…the balance might have tipped. While the Purist solution held a particular appeal, it wouldn't work in the long run. He'd suspected it before, and he knew it now. What he'd seen in Kagome's era had convinced him that such a war would not be won. It was suicide to even attempt it. No, the humans would come, and they would not be turned away. There were plenty more where they came from, in the far West, and eventually, the youkai would fall if they did not bow to the inevitable, and try to turn it to their advantage.

The other road, that of submission, sat even less well .He did not fancy bowing to some human lord, or letting his people be trod underfoot, treated as servants. No…there had to be a third way. He just hadn't found it yet.

And until he did, he would sit on the fence. Damia just couldn't see that. In another, earlier time he might have admired her determination…it must have taken some guts to off him like that…but now, it only filled him with a dull rage. How dare she…he wasn't angry so much at her political maneuvering…cutting, dirty politics were normal…but at her methods beyond that.

She knew what it would do to him. Telling Mesau to bury him alive…she _knew_ what it would do. And she'd had the ill manners to smile while doing it. Even Rin...children were not to be killed, or, if there was no other path, at least not to be tortured. She had known _exactly_ what he must have felt, if he was awake inside the spell. She had wanted to make sure that if she couldn't outright kill him, then he'd be driven into a state of madness, and be as good as dead; Mind dead. '_Fear, the little death, the mind killer. I will face my fear…'_

Well, she'd been right. Clever Damia. Drive the weak Taiyoukai crazy by letting him rot in the dark…beneath the ground…swallowed whole by hell… He shivered slightly in the warm daylight, remembering the night without the sun.

Beside him, Kagome rubbed her arm, goose bumps slightly visible. "Is it just me, or is it cold out here?" He shrugged. He rarely got cold.

She laughed. "Some help you are. Well, if you're coming to the village, you might as well follow me. If you _are_ coming…?" Was he? Or was he going to just…disappear? She blinked with slightly moist eyes. She didn't want him to go. He might be a pain, but she liked having him around. Maybe she was being silly, but she enjoyed the company. She hoped he stayed…

"Yes. For now." He still wasn't quite sure why he was going along with her. Maybe he'd need her help later…and somehow, it felt right to be with her. He couldn't say why, and he could barely feel the difference, but it was there… a sense that he should stay, because it would be right. Ridiculous. He was letting her far too close, but until he had a working knowledge of how things were in his absence...

Yes, it was official. He was going soft and senile…blame it on four or so centuries of collecting dust…

"Alright. Off we go!" Kagome hefted her bag, and started off towards Kaede's home, stepping along smartly. He was staying! She grinned even wider. Sesshoumaru was staying! And she wanted to see Sango, Shippo, Miroku…she wanted to see the whole village again! And now she could! She was home!

'_Home…'_

111111111

Kagome pulled up short as she saw the barricade strung around the village. "What's going on?" There never used to be a wall around the village…why did they need one? The youkai around here should have been pretty quiet without the Shikon around, right? Was it because of bandits?

Villages poked their heads out from behind the walls, holding onto farming implements in a menacing, businesslike way.

"Get lost, you good for nothing Samurai! Tell your Daimyo we want no part of him!" "Yeah!" "We've got enough to deal with, with all the youkai attacks! We don't need some stuck up Lord telling us what to do!"

An awkward figure pushed though them, holding a bone boomerang. "Alright you! We sent you on…your…way…Kagome!" Sango stared across the stretch of bare ground, eyes wide. "Kagome!"

She dropped her Hiraikotsu and ran across the ground, yelling that it was alright, this was Kagome, don't worry! over her shoulder.

The villagers stared at one another, and grinned. Kagome! Their young miko was back! Someone ran to get Miroku and Kaede, along with Shippo. Lady Kagome had returned! They would be safe now…Kikyou's reincarnation, their protector…

Sango stopped in front of Kagome, panting slightly. Kagome laughed, and gave her a hug. "Sango! Oh, I missed you…" She looked at Sango's somewhat larger midline, and grinned. "Don't tell me you and Miroku are already having kids…?"

They hadn't been married when she'd left, though there had been plans….Kagome smiled sadly. Gods…she'd missed so much in the time she'd been gone…Sango getting married, pregnant, Miroku actually settling down with her, Shippo growing up, Kirara…

Sango's cheeks took on a pink tinge. "Yes….we were married 8 months ago. He wants 20 children. Silly man. But yes…and…well…I do love him, despite his many faults…" She grinned, and gave Kagome another hug. "It's so good to see you again!"

Sango looked behind Kagome, and then stiffened as she finally noticed who had entered the clearing behind her friend.

Kagome's eyebrows creased. Why was Sango so wary…? "Sango?"

"What is _he_ doing here?! He's dead!"

"You mean Sesshoumaru?" Comprehension dawned.

"Of course I do! He disappeared, and I heard that he was dead, or that he'd run off with a human girl like his father and _then_ died!"

Sango smiled humorlessly. "I doubted the last was true…_much_ more likely he was dead… But what's he doing with you?" She looked hard at Sesshoumaru, and he glanced back, considering.

"Well…long story, really, but he's kinda wandering around with me for the moment, and not dead…" Kagome frowned. Something was going on here. She'd suspected Sesshoumaru had been 'done in' before, and it had to be true now. Who'd tried to kill him, and ended up sealing him instead? Damia? But she couldn't seal him, if she was a youkai...

Sesshoumaru frowned. So…someone had said he was dead? Most interesting. And why were the youkai of this region so restless, as the villagers had implied? If the villagers were this concerned over attacks, or about the soldiers of the local human Daimyo bothering them…

"Why are the youkai of this area so aggressive?"

Sango frowned, worrying her lip. Sesshoumaru was with Kagome…she would never have thought they'd be working or even traveling together in a million years. But if Kagome thought it was ok, then she did too. Sango trusted her judgment, even if she didn't know the reasons.

"I don't know. But they are. They attack us nearly every week by now. We had to build a wall, it got so bad. And the Damiyo's men have been coming around, trying to get us to help them out. Arms, men, supplies…and it's not just them either. There are three lords in this area. They are all working together, trying to create a large force. Normally it's an ongoing battle between them. Things are not adding up."

Kagome frowned as well. "Really? I think we should go inside and talk about this. It looks like lot has happened…and I still haven't seen Shippo and Miroku! I missed them, and Kaede…" Yup, something was definitely in the wind here. And she'd bet every last yen she owned (not much, mind you) that Sesshoumaru and this Damia person were at the heart of it.

Sango grinned. "Yes. We'll talk later." She looked back at Sesshoumaru again. "Is he coming? You have some stories of your own to tell, both of you! I want to know how you've managed, Kagome. Why didn't you come back? What happened…? And why is _he_ here?"

"Well…you're right. Maybe we should go inside for that. It _is_ rather long…but I want to know how you've been doing too! When did you and Miroku…?"

Silently, Sesshoumaru followed the two gossipy women, ears open for any information of use. While he did not really care to know the details of how exactly Sango and Miroku had gotten together, he _was_ interested in any mention of youkai behavior.

The humans might be puzzled, but he was not.

Purists.

Damia had roused the Purists…

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Sesshoumaru leaned against the corner of the room, listening carefully and ignoring the few odd glances cast his way. It had been a rather noisy reunion, despite the fact that a person named 'Kaede' was gone till dusk. The monk had even made some silly remark and let his hands wander…earning him dual retributions from the taijiya and Kagome. He'd thought the monk was now married…? Apparently he was wrong. He wondered absently what this miko named Kaede was like.

Kagome was talking hurriedly about her own adventures, still holding onto the tiny, bouncing kitsune in her lap. She'd started off telling the stories. She had told them more about what had happened the night she sealed the well, and of her attempts to break through.

Shippo grinned, mouth filled with some of the chocolate Kagome had somehow managed to buy for him. Sesshoumaru envied him. He couldn't eat it, even though he wanted to…why the poisonous stuff tasted so _good_…

"So it stayed that way for a year. I got a job. And then I found him." She pointed her thumb over her shoulder at Sesshoumaru. Shippo stared at him, still nibbling on the chocolate Kagome had given him with a wide smile.

Sesshoumaru could feel the others interest sharpen, and sighed slightly. He wanted Kagome to finish up and tell the story so Sango and Miroku could start on their side of things. _That_ was what he really wanted to know.

"He was at the museum, sealed inside a statue…"

"What?"

"Sealed as a statue? But that would mean…" Miroku frowned. Had there been foul play in the exchange of the lordship of the West? It would certainly explain a lot…who'd sealed him? The youkai who ruled after he was gone? A powerful miko? Who?

Sango and Miroku looked at one another. "I heard someone else was in charge after he died, but I never really paid attention. What…?"

"Who is this ruler?" Up till now Sesshoumaru had remained silent. The sudden voice made Sango jump slightly.

"Ah…Kyokei? And Dari…Dami…" Sango couldn't really remember. The different youkai rulers affected her only mildly. She'd only paid attention because it was the West, Inuyasha's half brother's lands.

"Damia."

"That was it. You know her?"

"Yes." One of his generals was known as Kyokei. It had to be the same person. He and Damia had always been close... "Kyokei as well. They were once in my service."

Kagome leaned forwards slightly. Now was a very good opportunity to find out **_exactly_** what was going on here. What about this Damia or Kyokei, and the odd behavior of the youkai? She'd known Damia was responsible for sealing him, but not that she'd become ruler. Kyokei? Who was he? It did make sense, but…there was so much she didn't know! Were the attacks and the new ruler connected? Something told her they were, and in recent years, she'd come to trust her intuition. It was often right. Blame the miko abilities for that one…

"And it was Damia who sealed you. So, spill the beans. Why'd she do it?"

Miroku's eyebrows lifted, and all three humans turned towards Sesshoumaru, expecting an answer.

Sesshoumaru looked back calmly. Between them, they had a pretty decent picture of events. But they didn't know everything. And if he wanted Kagome's help…but he didn't, did he?

But if he ever did…and really, she deserved to know some small part of why he'd ended up here. After looking after him for so long, she should know the reason.

So. A short summary of events leading up to that day in the meadow. What happened afterwards she, and the others, didn't really need to know. It was fairly self explanatory anyway…

"Tell me…does any of you know anything of the Purists? Or the Fellowship?" He wondered if they did.

Sango frowned slightly. The names sounded familiar. She had only a fuzzy picture of the political jungle those two ideas represented. "Aren't those the names of two factions…?" She wasn't too clear on what they actually _were_.

Miroku shrugged while Kagome sat forwards, all ears. So, it was political, was it…? Rather direct means of playing politics they had here!

"Yes and no. Damia is a Purist. Their school of thought runs along the lines of getting rid of humans. Some of them feel that should extend only to the newcomers, those with guns and a single god. Others believe more drastic measures are needed, anything from total extermination to periodic culling. They're lumped under the same name because they both believe humans should be dealt with violently, particularly the new ones."

Gods…this sounded like learning about the socialists in school! The Utopian and communal socialists, and the communists, the Marxist socialists, the democratic ones…one big muddle collectively called 'socialism'. Or Purists…

Kagome just couldn't escape school, could she? Sesshoumaru even _sounded_ like he was giving a lecture to a class… Kagome grinned. Except that Purists were nothing like utopian socialists…more like human haters…

So. Youkai didn't like humans. Nothing new to Sango. She'd known that since before she could walk. But for someone who favored exterminating humans like animals to be in a position so powerful…no wonder they had had so many attacks recently. Sango frowned. Something had to be done. They couldn't allow this to continue.

Sesshoumaru went on, mouth twisted ever so slightly. "On the other hand, the Fellowship thinks change is inevitable. They think the new humans are here to stay, and that we should do anything from fostering trade deals to acknowledging their rule over us. A human ruling youkai subjects… Ridiculous. Again, they vary. There are as many views as there are youkai."

Kagome raised an eyebrow. "So where does Damia fit? And…where do _you_?" Was he a Purist as well? He sounded like he disapproved, but she wouldn't put it past him. He wasn't exactly fond of humans…she shivered. Would he really go that far though? _Kill_ them all…? What about Rin? And…herself? She knew he wouldn't kill her, somehow. More miko intuition, maybe, but she just _knew_…

"She is in the middle ground. Kill the newcomers, destroy the samurai who have begun to use the things from the westerners. Kill the most powerful of the human Daimyo and a few villages as an example, leave the rest alone. I follow neither faction, just as the rulers of East, North, and South followed neither view, preferring to maintain a balance. That is why Damia took over. She felt more…_drastic_ measures should be taken."

He wasn't either of those things? Kagome smiled slightly. She hadn't wanted to think he was a Purist. And fat chance he was a Fellowship person. The Purists sounded pretty nasty, like they hated all the mortals…but…she frowned as a rather horrible thought occurred to her.

"But…wait…if…if you were sealed, and she hates humans…then…what happened to Rin?" Kagome asked softly, whispering. She didn't want to know, since she was pretty sure what had happened. She'd met Rin a few times, and she'd been so happy, always smiling…

Sesshoumaru closed his eyes. She _would_ have to ask that, wouldn't she? Equally softly: "What do you think? The very reason she caught me off guard in the first place. While I was gone, Mesau murdered her. In the confusion that followed, Damia tried to kill me."

Kagome closed her eyes as well, not caring that he would see her grieving along with him. She remembered the time at the park, when he'd watched the children scrambling over the swing sets. Poor Rin…. Looking at it now, she could see he'd still been mourning…and she never knew…Kagome glanced over at him, not sure what to say. She knew he wouldn't take her sympathy. And he was playing poker-face again, just so they wouldn't feel sorry for him. But she could tell it was an act this time. She knew what was going on in that pretty head of his…

Beside the fire, Kirara stretched and turned over in her sleep. Coals crackled in the sudden silence. Sango blinked at Sesshoumaru, surprised that he would tell them this. He was usually very tightfisted with information. But all their questions…he'd answered them, personal or not. Or was it _Kagome_ he was really telling, and just allowing them to listen…?

Then again, this was something like a war council. They had to know, and he had to know what the others knew. So maybe he was being cooperative, in his way. She certainly appreciated it. But that poor little girl…

Miroku sighed, murmuring a brief prayer for the departed under his breath. Someone that would kill a child…his hand closed around Sango's, and he made up his mind right then that he would do all in his power to get rid of the new ruler. He wanted their child to live to grow up without fear of marauding youkai.

"Is Damia the reason we're being attacked so much? Stirring up discontent among the masses? And…who is Mesau?"

"Likely. I do not know yet for sure if it is Damia's doing."

Sango's eyes hardened. Her fingers rested protectively above her growing midriff, and her face glowed even more fiercely. Her thoughts had echoed Miroku's, though somewhat stronger. She was _not_ going to stand by and watch as a prominent member of the youkai community dedicated themselves to eradicating humanity. Where one sprang up, there would be more who followed. Other members of these Purists would follow her example and take control. She was not going to have her child grow up in a world like that. Or not even live to grow up…no…she couldn't think like that. She _wouldn't_ let that happen. She had already lost her entire family, whole village. She wouldn't let go of her new husband or her child, once born, until she was dead.

She wasn't going to let the youkai attacks on her current home continue either. She didn't know yet if her own home village would ever be rebuilt, not with the memories remaining, but she couldn't let her friend's home be destroyed as well. She wouldn't wish that on anyone.

"I will help you take back your lands, Sesshoumaru. If that is what you are here to do." Sango hoped that was what he was doing. If he wasn't…well, she and Miroku would just have to take matters into their own hands, wouldn't they?

"So will I." Miroku's fingers closed around his staff. His hand slipped around Sango's shoulders, and they both sat up straighter. "This is for my home as well."

"Me too!" Shippo grinned wildly. He was beside himself that Kagome had come home It would be almost like when they were searching for shards again! He left Kagome and went to sit by Kirara, curled up by the fire. He didn't want to lose his new home, not when he'd already lost his first one…

Kagome smiled. Oh, Shippo…trying to be brave again…"I will too. I told you I would help you before, and I see no reason why I shouldn't do it again!" She grinned, trying to lighten the heavy atmosphere. This was deadly serious, but they couldn't let that stop them. "Besides…there's still all those scrolls at home. Weren't you still trying to finish reading them? I think you need me or the Shikon to get through the well."

Sesshoumaru was stunned. He hadn't asked for their help, and didn't want it, not really. They might come in handy at times, but to have to ask humans for help…but they had just _offered _it…

Was it any different from living in the Higurashi shrine for a few weeks?

Yes. It was.

Here, he was home. He didn't need them now. He didn't need Kagome...

Inexplicable humans…just when he thought he had them figured out they had to go and surprise him again…

"I do not need your help. Kagome, you're not trained. Sango is pregnant. The fox is hardly of an age to be out fighting a war, and the monk…he will be no match for Mesau alone." Even if they were fighting for their home as well, the group of mismatched personalities was hardly going to make Damia shake behind the castle walls.

Kagome raised an eyebrow. "You're just going to have to deal with us helping you out." This wasn't just about him anymore. This affected them as well. If Damia remained in power, they'd have more hostile youkai on their hands. The Daimyo must be looking for men to defend himself, if he was after the village for supplies as well. They were between a rock and a hard place. This was their fight too. Why wouldn't he see that? Was he that proud…?

He would just have to deal with it, wouldn't he? They were going to help him whether he wanted them to or not!

"We shall see." He sounded rather dubious. He disliked becoming involved even more with humans, even ones such as Kagome. He couldn't afford to become more attached...

Miroku frowned as the awkward silence stretched on. Who wasn't he a match for? "Who _is_ Mesau? You mentioned her name before…"

"A miko. She has served Damia for 26 years. I never looked into her closely enough. But she is powerful." He _should _have looked into her, though. Sesshoumaru mentally gave himself a kick. It wasn't every day your general announced she had an ally in the form of a miko. Such alliances were rare nowadays…why hadn't he thought much about it? He should have…his fault…

Miroku frowned. "A miko? In with the Purists? That seems odd. You don't know anything else about her?" At least Sesshoumaru was answering the questions they had…which in itself was a miracle…Kagome must have done something to him since they'd seen him last…

"No. She works for Damia and has for years. That is all I know. Nothing on her motivation." Some war council this was. He didn't know anything, and the humans knew less…

Well, there was one way to fix that. Go out scouting… "Is that all the information you have?" If they had nothing else to say, then he wanted to go and find out more. The youkai community had to know more…

"Yes. You've helped us a lot, Sesshoumaru." Sango didn't say how surprised she was. Sesshoumaru handing out favors…what the world was coming to…

"An exchange of information. Nothing more." He straightened and faced the door.

Kagome still had more she wanted to ask him. Was he going somewhere? He was going to get her help whether he liked it or not…

"Hey, where are you going?" What was he doing now? Kaede hadn't even gotten here yet…she might know something!

"To ask a few more questions." Sesshoumaru reached into the small bag at his feet, and pulled out the necklace Kagome had made.

Kagome started at him. "You…kept that…" What was he thinking? He'd hated it! So why was he still using it? He couldn't be _that_ desperate for information, could he?

Sesshoumaru didn't comment. He'd kept it because he wanted to keep it. That was all. It was useful, and it seemed a waste to throw it away, since he could still use it. And Kagome had gone to such trouble making it...

He just stepped outside into the twilight, and vanished beyond the wooden palisade, putting the necklace on only once out of sight.

Sango closed the door after him. "Kaede should be here soon. We'll have to tell her this. Maybe she knows about Mesau…" The older woman had been in the neighboring village all day, tending to a sick child. She'd told Kagome that Kaede would be back near dusk. So she should be here soon.

Miroku frowned at the window. "That necklace…why were you surprised he still had it?" There was something about it… it looked a bit like Inuyasha's necklace...

"It's…something I made at home. Or at least, tried to make. It took a while before I got the illusion right. It was to make him look human…there are no youkai at home, you see, and I didn't want him to stick out…"

Miroku frowned after the vanished Sesshoumaru, absolutely floored. He just didn't understand the white-haired youkai at _all_…. He claimed he didn't like humans, then went and adopted one. He didn't like the Fellowship, but he didn't like the Purists either. And then he pulled out a necklace with that particular illusion attached and actually _wore_ it…

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Sesshoumaru darted thought the trees, retracing a path he'd gone down before. Cool mist brushed past him as he bounded along beneath the canopy. There was one youkai who might know about Mesau and Damia. Or about the rest of the whole mess…

Bokusenou. The old magnolia's web of roots spread far, gathering information like a spider sitting at the center of a leafy web. The old tree knew much, and could be trusted not to spread information about his return.

Black hair whipped past his face, and he drew to a halt. Traveling took far less time now that he had no little girl tagging along…

He closed his eyes against the thought, and took off the necklace after checking the area. No one was around to see or sense him. Not many people disturbed the sleep of Bokusenou without good reason.

He tucked the necklace away, and approached, questions buzzing in his mind. Ahead, a tall tree materialized slowly out of the evening fog.

"Ah…Sesshoumaru. I was not expecting you at this time…"

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_Home at long, long last. Lol. (And it only took, what, 17 chapters and a Prologue? Haha.) Hope you enjoyed it, though laying out the framework for the next little arc in the story might have been a bit dry… Hopefully nobody fell asleep on me. Lol. _

_Thank you to everyone who reviewed last chapter! I think it's a new record for reviews, and they were all wonderful. (I feel loved, now. Lol.) _

_Until next week, ja amata, minna-san! XD_!


	19. ch18:Brought To Light

**:: Brought To Light ::**

Kagome sat cross-legged facing the fire that night, half listening to Shippo's avid description of himself helping to build the wall around the village. She'd wondered if he'd have changed at all, but he was still her Shippo, though a few centimeters taller. She stroked Kirara, smiling. It was just so good to be home…a pity she'd have to go back to her own time tomorrow. She'd left a note saying she would be back to set up an arrangement before she left this morning.

It was hard to believe that just a few hours ago she was at work, desperately giving notice. She still had to thank Chihero for slipping that two weeks notice letter into the paperwork for her. Good thing she'd left a note for her mom explain everything this morning, or they'd be worried sick…Souta had already been at school and mom at work when Sesshoumaru had taken her to the museum, while grampa was sleeping like a log. She hoped they understood why she hadn't waited for them, but just gone straight back to the past. She would explain it all tomorrow afternoon.

"And then I helped to dig the holes for the posts! Kirara helped too…she's good at digging…and we tied everything together! I'm really good at knots! Kaede said so!"

Kagome smiled. "Really? You've learned a lot, haven't you?" She'd missed Shippo…

"Yeah…I missed you, Kagome! Inuyasha too…even if he did hit me on the head sometimes…" Shippo's face fell for a second. He'd been lost without Inuyasha, or his adopted mother…one was dead, the other just…gone. He was frantically trying to believe that Kagome wouldn't just disappear again. He'd been talking nonstop, still not quite able to believe it was true, it was really happening. It seemed a dream. The first few weeks after Kagome had left were as bad as the ones following his father's death. He never wanted to go though that again…

But she was back now. And he wasn't going to let go of her anytime soon. Tiny fingers closed tighter on her wrist. "You're staying for a long time now, aren't you? I missed you…"

"I won't, Shippo. I never forgot you for a minute. I was…stupid. I won't do something that dumb again. And I did come back, didn't I?"

"Yes you did." Kaede's voice echoed out from the doorway. "I wondered why ye never came back."

"…I…went and sealed the well on myself…" And she was still kicking herself for it, even if she'd finally fixed everything…poor Shippo had really missed her, even if he hadn't grown much while she was a away. A few centimeters, maybe… She had missed him, and missed out on seeing her friend's wedding. Sango hadn't made much of a fuss over her marriage, but there had been a ceremony. And she hadn't been there to wish her friend good luck…

"Oh, is that it? Well, you must have managed to learn how to undo it, or you wouldn't be here, now would you?" Kaede sat down, facing Kagome across the fire. "Ye always were a bright child."

Kagome shook her head slightly. No, she wasn't bright. She'd partially _failed_ high school... She opened her mouth to explain, but Shippo beat her to it.

He grinned, and looked up at Kagome. "Kaede took care of me while you were gone! Sango and Miroku got too busy sneaking around at night, and then looking after defending the village…"

Kagome covered her mouth to stop the grin from showing. Sneaking around at night? Sango had never mentioned _that_… "Really? Well, defense is important isn't it?" She desperately tried to keep a straight face. Oh yes, very important…

"Aye. We are most grateful for their help. I'm sure they told you how bad things have gotten?"

Kagome nodded. They had described the youkai attacks once Sesshoumaru was gone, and their belief that the three local Lords were trying to build up an army to defend against the youkai.

"It's a good thing they were here. I'm getting too old to attend to my duties properly…"

Kagome smiled softly. "That's…you're never old, Kaede. You'll still be going strong for years. But…that brings up a question I've been meaning to ask. That barrier…I didn't know how to break it. The only reason I'm here is because I found some old scrolls that gave me a clue as to how to get back. I'm not even half trained…" she frowned. Really, it had been Sesshoumaru who'd found that information. "Actually, Sesshoumaru is the one who helped me get back…"

Kagome sighed. She'd finally do something she should have attended to ages ago. Maybe she should go get those scrolls tomorrow and bring them back here. They might help her train with Kaede…maybe. The author rambled a great deal…

"Will you train me?"

Kaede smiled. "Kagome, I've been waiting for you to ask that…"

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Sesshoumaru faced the 2000 year old tree. "You weren't expecting me?" He raised an eyebrow.

"No, I did not. Particularly since there is a certain statue sitting buried in a meadow as we speak…"

Sesshoumaru grimaced at Bokusenou. "Yes. It won't be there for much longer." Not if he could help it. That was something that he would have to brace himself to deal with soon. He didn't want to leave 'himself' stuck there…but he also wanted to just forget about the whole damn thing for now. That was just one confusing, time traveling headache… and there were too many bad memories…

He calmed himself. First things first. "I'm sure you know why that statue is there."

"Of course. I know a great many things. You want to know about Damia and Mesau, yes?"

"Yes." What were those two up to? What had they concocted together…? What of his other generals, Jaken, and the other domains? What of the city? He wanted to know everything.

111111

Kagome sat back and blinked, as Kaede finished laying out the next few months worth of training.

It sounded…interesting. Practicing the bow, and meditation. She could do that. She wasn't all that bad a shot by now. She could reliably blast anything she hit to pieces. Meditation she'd hardly ever done, but she should be able to pick it up not too badly.

Learning the different workings, and how to recognize them was another thing. Making shikikami as well, and learning about healing, powerful objects, and seals. (Sesshoumaru might be interested in that last one…she'd have to ask him…) Maybe later, when Sango was up to it, she could teach her some basic hand to hand moves. Like Karate. Kaede had mentioned a technique of using purifying power in your hands and feet, to fight like that. Kagome could see the value of it. So many times when her bow had been useless because the youkai were too close...

"I…thank you, Kaede. I hope I do well…"

"I'm sure you will. You managed to do a remarkable amount without training."

Kagome turned pink. "…not that much…" She was an idiot fumbling around in the dark…

Kaede laughed. Kagome had no idea…it had taken Kaede _years_ to do what Kagome had managed to accomplish with no teacher in a few months with her bow. She might not know much else, but she had a lot of potential, more than Kaede had ever seen in anyone before. Kagome was a miko born...

"And…there was something else I wanted to ask you. And tell you. Did Sango say Sesshoumaru was with me?"

"No, she didn't." Sesshoumaru? What did he have to do with this…? Wasn't he the one who helped her get back? "Inuyasha's half brother?" _'The rather…_murderous _one?'_

"That's him…he was sealed inside a statue when I found him at home. I must have broken the seal by accident, because he ended up living with me for a few weeks before I got back here. He's not as bad as he used to be. Or at least, he didn't try to disembowel anyone this time." Kagome laughed quietly. Inuyasha's view of Sesshoumaru had slightly colored her own till he stayed with them, and she'd had the opportunity to see him better. "Apparently, he was nearly killed by a youkai named Damia who's ruling in his place, and a miko named Mesau. Do you know of her?"

Kaede frowned slightly. So, Sesshoumaru was here? She had thought Kagome must mean another Sesshoumaru, since she'd heard the Lord of the West was killed. But something more must be at work...

The name Mesau did sound familiar…but only slightly. "I heard of a miko by that name over 20 years ago. She learned from Tsubaki, I think…I don't know much about her…she left her village after bandits razed it to the ground, I believe..."

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"You know, of course, the different ways a youkai and a human with spiritual power can strike a bargain, correct?" The tree smiled, and raised a wooden eyebrow.

"Some of them. It has never been an area of particular interest." Sesshoumaru waited as the tree's long fingers scraped the bark of his chin.

"Well, you should be interested now. It is what Mesau and Damia have done."

"I guessed that much." He'd forgotten how irritating the tree could be. The ancient magnolia had to spin every piece of information out slowly…but in the end, Sesshoumaru would know more than before.

"Generally, a dark miko like Mesau who wants something only one of us can give, or a youkai who wants a miko's power are the parties involved. If the youkai in question is quite weak, or the miko particularly strong, then the human controls the deal. He or she might harbor the youkai within their own body, and control their actions."

That wasn't the case here. He'd heard of a dark miko his brother had come across who'd done that. Damia wasn't as strong as he was, but she came close. She had to be the one in charge. She would never have made the deal otherwise. "What would Mesau get from such a bargain?"

"I don't know the details, but I can guess. Eternity, or nearly so. Most youkai will share their life-span with the human in question. Eternal youth, beauty, freedom from illness, more power…all of those things can draw them. And Mesau is willing to do anything to keep Japan safe from the invaders... even to make a deal with the youkai Purists. The bandits that razed her village were armed with the new weapons, and there were a number of Europeans, as they call themselves, with them. It has colored her view since, I think."

"I see. And the youkai?" Well it certainly wasn't beauty in Mesau's case. She looked rather stout, the last time he had seen her. But she hadn't looked old, either, despite being 26 years older than when she entered Damia's service. Was she really that devoted to Japan? Why...? What had she seen in such a cause?

"Control of a miko, if they are the stronger party. You know how powerful a weapon that can be. If they are not stronger, then they still get power without control." The tree frowned thoughtfully. "Usually such a deal has one party in charge, with power given by one and taken by the other. But there are sometimes partnerships, equal deals"

"I rather doubt Damia did that." She was too proud to let herself sink that low. Make a deal to obtain a valuable human servant, yes. A _partnership_ with a human? Definitely not. He still wasn't quite sure why she would make such a deal. Apparently, the end justified the means, Purist ideals aside…for both of them. He knew Damia was more practical than anything. If such a deal was made...

"I think you are right." The tree smiled craftily. "Would you also like to know what she is up to now?"

1111111

"Mesau is a dark miko? Then she must be the one who sealed Sesshoumaru…"

Kaede smiled. "I doubt it. Not without doing something to greatly increase her power. _You_ might be able to seal Sesshoumaru on your own, but from what I know she wouldn't be able to command that much power."

Kagome laughed. "I don't think I'll ever get that good… Not that I'd want to seal him. He's a decent guy, somewhere under all the layers."

Kaede laughed too. "You're right about that…you probably don't know how to even begin to make a seal, do you?"

"How would I do that?"

"Well…there's a few different kinds of seal. Sealing something like power of a youkai into an object, such as a mirror or a painting. Using an ofuda, or a few other things together with the ofuda…"

Shippo sighed as the two women got deep into a discussion on miko powers, how they were used, and how to make a proper ofuda…He'd wanted to talk to Kagome more about what had happened while she was gone, but it would have to wait. He knew how important learning to be a miko was to her.

"…then, you can also just seal the youkai, turn them into a statue. "

"I think that's what she must have done. Would a seal make him really thin though? He was in pretty bad shape when I got to him."

"No…that must have happened before. I can't think of a seal that would do that. There are instances where other spells go wrong and act _like_ seals, draining energy over the years, but…"

"Hey Kirara, are Sango and Miroku doing sentry duty tonight?" Shippo rolled his eyes at Kagome. If she was going to be busy, then he might as well leave her alone to work. His ears caught scraps of conversation, as the two women started to talk shop.

"…sounds rather horrible, I should think…"

Boring… But at least Kagome was back! He grinned widely and fidgeted, waiting for Kirara.

"Mrrow…" Kirara nodded slightly, and got up, Shippo following her. She led him outside to the walls, and they wandered down the rows of trimmed trees together. Finally, they stumbled across Sango and Miroku, both determinedly standing guard.

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Sesshoumaru narrowed his eyes. "What has Damia done?"

Bokusenou smiled slightly. "She is trying to unify the west, and convince the other domains that they should unite and drive off these newcomers to our shores. She has mobilized the army, and encouraged the attacks on settlements. In the other lands, the Purists are clamoring to follow suit. Lady Ezo of the North can no longer control her own people, in some cases. They are getting out of hand up in Hokkaido. Aizu will follow whoever wins. The South is trying to regain peace. Choshu, in the East...nobody knows what way he'll go just yet."

"Really. What has Damia said of me? I've heard I'm now dead, or run off and then died with my human lover." It was good to know what the other lands were doing. He'd consider it more later. Sesshoumaru smiled humorlessly. Damia might be a brilliant general, but she was terrible when it came to rumors. Hardly anyone would believe that… he was well known for his dislike of mortals.

But the other Purists…they might believe it. He wasn't one of them, and they would be more inclined to believe ill of an enemy. Even if they didn't countenance the tale, it was convenient to pretend outrage.

If they were pressuring the other Lords of North and East, or the city… He knew the South would be an unlikely Purist ally. They had Fellowship connections though the mainland, and had even thought about setting up a trading enclave in Nagasaki with the new, pale skinned humans. The youkai city of Aziu was torn in half, with rumors of fights breaking out in the night, last he'd known. What was the current balance of events?

"That is the gist of it. She said Rin was this woman's child, and that you adopted her because of the woman. You'd be surprised how many people believe it."

"Rubbish. Has anyone seen this imaginary woman? Had they heard about her before Damia invented her? Of course not." Why would sensible people he'd known for years believe her? His general dislike for humanity was well known. Even though he had remained uncommitted to either side, people sometimes pegged him as a Purist. Except for Rin, he'd never lapsed in his icy public image.

"Nevertheless, people believe. Damia is sitting atop a movement so large I don't think she quite understands what she's done. _She_ might quit once the foreigners are driven off, but the other Purists will not. I'm not sure Mesau or Damia realize this. I heard Kyokei fell in behind Damia, and he's even worse than she is. They will keep on going, and Damia will not be able to stop. The Fellowship is mobilizing as well, waiting for the Purists to attack the secret youkai embassy outside Nagasaki. It hasn't come to blows yet, but it is only a matter of time. You picked a rather bad time to be 'killed'…"

"I know. I wonder…can I stop this?" So there was now a Fellowship embassy, was there? More toadying up the foreigners. It was even worse than he'd thought. Kyokei…he'd known the man had defected to Damia, and long known of his strong ideas. What of the other two generals?

The bloody Purists would start the fighting, and then the Fellowship would join in to protect their pet humans and their investments. He wondered if they had started trading with the newcomers, as had been rumored before he'd been attacked. They may well have, if there was an embassy...

Once the battles began, the humans either would join in or be caught in the crossfire, and at the end of the day, they'd have a lot of dead youkai bodies mixed in with the mortals. While that might not deter the mortals for long (they bred like rabbits, it seemed…) it would become devastating for his own race. Their numbers grew at a _much _slower rate.

"One wonders as well. I know Kogaku was killed, for refusing to follow Damia. Of Sorai I know nothing beyond the fact she lives."

Sesshoumaru closed his eyes. His spymistress was an enigma, but the fact she was still alive pointed to falling in behind Damia. Expected; Sesshoumaru was dead. Not many followed a 'dead' leader.

Kogaku...he was sorry to hear he was dead. He'd been a loyal, clever diplomat. Loyal to the death. Had he been the only one of the four to oppose Damia? What of the rest of the family, or his followers?

"Bokusenou, I thank you. You have given me much to consider. One last thing, before I must regretfully depart. Do you know anything of who else lives?" Everything was just a mess…he had to find some way out of it. He had to get to the city, or to one of the youkai settlements in the west. Uraga? It was the nearest to the Western citadel, and to the well. He ought to find out more there. But how to move around without being recognized…?

"Unfortunately, I do not. I believe Jaken is alive, but know nothing else. I wish you luck."

Sesshoumaru nodded, and turned around to leave, exiting the clearing in slow, measured steps. He walked a short distance away from Bokusenou's clearing, not wanting the tree as witness to him putting on the illusion, and disappeared into the dark. Night had fallen while he was talking.

Damia couldn't stop this, if it went much further. He wasn't at all sure he would be able to even at this point. Certainly not if it continued for much longer, and fighting broke out. Then it would be near impossible to stop the madness and return Japan to the uneasy truce there had been before. If she managed to get even one of the other lands fully behind her, the East or the North…that would tip the scales, and the fighting would start. He wasn't so much afraid of the other lords and ladies choosing sides, but the way the generals could be swayed. If they overthrew anyone else, it would be an end to it.

It might begin innocently enough. They'd find a few samurai who used the new guns, and kill them, find a few human converts to this new Christian religion and do the same. They would kill any foreigner they could get their hands on. Then the humans would fight back against any youkai they could find, lumping his race under the single heading of 'enemy'. They always did. Typical human mob mentality. Kill the 'monster' before it kills you, even if the poor being in question had done nothing at all.

And once they had done that…that's when the real bloodletting would begin. Youkai who were attacked by mobs of humans would fight back even if they weren't Fellowship or Purists. Those who hadn't committed to a single party would be targeted because they weren't in with the 'right' faction. The Fellowship would move against the Purists as soon as they lifted a hand against their precious foreigners.

But, once the first goal was accomplished, the Purist faction would begin fighting within itself as well. Some of them wanted to kill every human they could, and some simply wanted to drive off the foreign invaders. He'd known of Kyokei's more Purist leanings before, and he knew to what extremes they went. His former general wouldn't stop till every human in Japan was dead, or living hand to mouth and powerless. Damia did not go that far, and Mesau was human. She couldn't want to do more than drive away the invaders. Sorai had been neutral before, so far as he knew. Dissidence in the ranks always helped. But not if it happened _after_ the civil war…

The normal state of the human lords had been martial chaos for the last hundred years, but the youkai were far more peaceful, generally, despite popular belief. This would take that regional chaos and turn it into a full fledged war spanning the length of Japan. Everyone fighting each other…

Could he stop this soon enough? He wanted to get rid of Damia first. Perhaps if she was taken out, if her key followers were taken out, then the other lords would be able to help him stop this. The South had Fellowship connections, and the others were uncommitted so far as he knew. He might yet be able to stop this.

Then again, he might not. Perhaps…perhaps this war was the reason there were no youkai in Kagome's time. They had decimated their small numbers so much they were unable to do anything but hide or die.

Hide or die…

He thought about it. One youkai city, and under 13 major villages spread across the islands. All told, there were perhaps 24, 400 of the more powerful youkai in Japan. He didn't bother counting the useless rubbish attacking the human settlement he'd recently left. Even if he included them that number would not have grown much. Maybe to 55, 000, if that. The West itself had only three villages to its name, and the castle he'd formerly lived in. There were many millions more humans than that in his own time, let alone in Kagome's. And that was just Japan.

If they went to war, their numbers could be slashed in half, not counting whatever damage the humans managed to inflict in the chaos that would emerge. They could be reduced to near nothing. They could be left with only a few thousands…only a few thousand of his race in Japan. It frightened him.

It was an awful possibility, but it might be true. If it was… He knew what the world would look like in a few hundred years.

Unless he did something. But _what_?

Was Damia insane, or merely agonizingly stupid?

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Sango sighed and rubbed her eyes. She found it harder to stay awake since she'd become pregnant. And she'd had the oddest cravings…

Poor Miroku had been told to look for ramen, and chocolate. Nothing else would do .The monk had begged Shippo to help him out, hoping that the little fox (currently curled up and asleep on her shoulder) would still have some.

He didn't, of course. Shippo had eaten his last candy bar months ago. And so then they'd tried to get her a substitute, mostly one of Shippo's illusions with some sweetening…

Actually, they hadn't done that badly. She'd known it wasn't chocolate, but after all the trouble they'd gone to, she'd just smiled and played along. It tasted pretty close to the real thing.

She really was lucky. Miroku might still have a few issues keeping his hands to himself, but since Naraku's death and the lifting of his curse, and their marriage, he'd stopped asking every other girl he met for a child.

_He_ said it was because "He had the sweetest, most beautiful girl already…why would he want more?"

_She_ was certain some of his recent chastity stemmed from the fact that her temper was even more erratic now that she was pregnant…

She smiled, and reached out to hold onto his sleeve. He grinned back, and she could feel a hand rest around her shoulders before inching steadily lower…

A white blur moved among the trees, and she snapped to attention. "Miroku! Company!"

The hand was immediately reclaimed so that Miroku could hold his staff in two hands. "Who goes there!"

The white figure didn't answer, but crouched and jumped over beside them. Miroku braced himself beside her, and she readied her boomerang. Who would attack the village this time…?

Sesshoumaru.

Miroku relaxed slightly. "Just you. You could give us warning next time…" Sesshoumaru had stepped in at exactly the wrong moment! Except…Miroku blushed slightly as he remembered Shippo was still on Sango's shoulder.

Maybe Shippo should go to bed…then he could have a somewhat livelier shift of duty than otherwise…not that he'd do more than maybe sneak a feel…guard duty was important enough to forgo the rest…

"Could you take Shippo with you? I'm on duty and he's all worn out…" Miroku picked the sleepy little fox off Sango's shoulder, and held him out to Sesshoumaru without thinking twice.

Wait…Miroku blinked, horrified. He was giving _Shippo_ to _Sesshoumaru_…why was he doing this?! Why?

He hardly knew him! Except for the all those times he'd tried to kill Inuyasha…Miroku felt like smacking himself in the head. _'Think, you idiot monk!'_

Sesshoumaru stared at Shippo. "Fine." It was odd…he looked a bit like Rin had looked like when she was tired and sleeping. Relaxed and peaceful…

Miroku blinked slightly. Strange... Of course, there had been Rin, hadn't there? So Shippo ought to be safe…maybe.

"Alright." Sango smiled as Miroku carefully handed over the sleeping fox over. She'd been worried for a few seconds, but apparently Sesshoumaru didn't mind taking him inside.

Wonders never ceased…

"Did you find anything out there?" Had he managed to get some new information for them?

"Yes." Sesshoumaru turned back towards Kaede's hut, still carrying Shippo. The fire cat seemed torn between following him and staying with the guards, but eventually stayed with her mistress.

Sango sighed as he disappeared back towards the village, awkwardly carrying Shippo. So, he had found something. And she would find out about it tomorrow. She wondered what was going on.

"What do you suppose he found?" Miroku frowned, hand fiddling with the purple sleeve that had once covered his wind tunnel. He still wore it sometimes, occasionally paranoid the wind tunnel would return in the night and suck the whole village inside.

Of course, he also missed the way he could just get rid of annoying youkai by pulling them into his hand…now he was stuck with just his staff and scrolls as weapons, and whatever his training had given him.

Oh well. He was glad the curse was gone…he only missed it when the youkai got too troublesome...

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Sesshoumaru nudged the screen covering the door aside, and padded into the tiny house.

Kagome was asleep by the fire, and he put Shippo beside her. It was quite late by this time. He turned around and glanced at the old woman sitting on the other side of the fire, watching him.

"So you are Sesshoumaru. You look a bit like your brother, though from his descriptions I'd have expected you to have horns, breath poison and be ten feet high…"

Well, he was some of those, but only in his true form…and he'd look slightly the worse for wear if he transformed these days. A giant dog with three legs was fairly unimpressive, not to mention useless…no thanks to his half brother, of course…

The woman smiled. "Well, that's past. I'm Kaede, the miko of this village. You are welcome to stay here for now."

Sesshoumaru nodded slightly, though he had no intentions of sleeping indoors when he had a choice of many fine trees outside. He would rather sleep outside under the open roof of the sky than in this tiny, smoke infested house. At least Kagome's home had been bearable…

"I see."

Kaede smiled. "I think, once I've trained Kagome up a bit, she wants to go out and help ye find Damia. She said she was going to. "

"Really." So she still thought she was going to help him? He had no use for a miko who wasn't trained. At least she had the sense to attempt gaining control over her power before trying to aid him. But he didn't want her to stay...

Of course…perhaps the reason she and the other two humans were trying to help Sesshoumaru had more to do with their own safety than with wanting to aid the former lord of the West.

"I think you might like the help, Sesshoumaru. She told me you were up against a miko powerful enough to seal you. I have no idea where Mesau got all that power, but I think you shouldn't dismiss her so easily."

Sesshoumaru blinked. Had the old woman read his mind…? He had dismissed Kagome's abilities, hadn't he? Well, not so much that as the fact he didn't want to get any closer…

"You know of Mesau?"

"Only slightly, but yes. She trained with a dark priestess named Tsubaki, who'd made a deal with some lesser youkai to give her eternal youth and beauty. Mesau might have done the same later, if she suddenly has all this power. I don't know much about her."

Most interesting. So Mesau had been tied to Damia's service though more than a vow of loyalty… Bokusenou had thought she was, but here was a second opinion stating the same thing.

"I see." Sesshoumaru turned around and left the fire-lit room, headed for a rather nice tree he'd spotted a ways back. It was within the village wall, so he shouldn't need to worry about youkai picking up his presence, especially mixed in with all the humans in this village.

Kaede watched him go, eyes considering. She glanced back at where Kagome was sleeping with Shippo, and went to cover up the fox child.

Sesshoumaru had been sealed for centuries…because of Mesau. Kagome had mentioned another name before she fell asleep, Damia. The current ruler of the Western lands. Perhaps she was the youkai Mesau had paired up with.

She didn't know. She had a feeling that Sesshoumaru knew more than he was letting on, though. All her years had taught her a few things about dealing with people.

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Sesshoumaru settled in for the night, smiling slightly into the dark. Home again, with the open sky above him and a normal sized tree to sleep in…

And it wasn't stuffy out here, the way it was in Kaede's home, or even in Kagome's room. Some nights he'd felt like he was being stifled by inches unless the window was wide open.

He shrugged himself into the space between the branches, and curled up for the night. But he didn't fall asleep immediately. He kept thinking back to what the old magnolia tree had told him.

Damia…it all came back to her, in the end. He wondered what she was doing right now. Probably still up, attending to all the new duties her little coup had given her. She was always so finicky about details… It made her the most brilliant general he'd had, all that attention to the finer details, but it made living with her rather stressful. She was always barging in, and _demanding_ why you hadn't done the damn paperwork.

He wondered what had happened to his other general and spy mistress, Sorai. She was from the continent, originally. She had sat on the fence, just like he had. She'd kept to herself a lot when she wasn't on duty.

Damia, and Kyokei, he knew about. Damia had 'killed' him, Sesshoumaru, and apparently Kyokei supported her as the logical successor. No surprises there, really. That was the normal way things went, gaining power by killing those currently in power. It was the timing, and the loss of uneasy truce, that made this a disaster. Coupled with a desire for revenge, Sesshoumaru had no intentions of leaving Damia unattended to.

It wasn't detailed information, but it would do for a start. Kogaku was dead, and he knew nothing of Jaken other than a good chance he was among the living. He had to find out more.

What about the army? Damia had mobilized them, but had they all followed her? How many people were supporting her, and who had remained loyal to him? Had there been battles over the succession? If there was disquiet in the army, there might be a crack to exploit. He certainly had the element of surprise...Damia would think him safely out of the way. Would there be any still loyal...?

Who had died for that loyalty?

It was a distinct possibility. Youkai politics _were_ rather sharp, in some ways. It would leave him with a great many fewer options if all possible sources of support were dead. He didn't know, yet. And there was no point worrying about it, not now. What had happened had happened.

He had to get to sleep. He had work to do tomorrow. Sesshoumaru's plan was to see if he could get close enough to Damia to kill her, then deal with the aftermath, but he needed more information first, and it might take him a while to get it. How much stronger was Damia? Could he even take her, by himself…?

Finding a few more youkai he could trust, and telling Kagome about his conversation with the magnolia tree he could do tomorrow, but information might take longer. Kagome had to go back to her own time tomorrow, and he wanted to find out how the well worked. Did he need to be with her or not? What about the Shikon…?

Below Sesshoumaru's sleeping form, Sango and Miroku stood side by side, watching the night for any sign of venturesome enemy youkai.

Sango's hand drifted above her rounded out stomach. She was not going to let Damia or anyone else start a war… even if, at 7 months pregnant, she wasn't very good at fighting, she would make _sure_ her baby lived in a peaceful world…

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Kyokei stared across the table at Damia, lips thinned. Damia wasn't moving fast enough! True, there really was no urgency ...apart from the fact that more of the barbarian West came into the country every day, more of their ideas, and more importantly, weapons.

He didn't care if the human flies decided to worship the sun, rocks, or this new thing the barbarians brought with them. Youkai were above such things. No, what he cared about was the reports of a band of samurai massacring a small youkai family with the new rifles. Any time a quiet family settled in some out of the way place, the next thing you knew someone human came along and there was a human settlement, then a village, then a town, a city...and then the exterminators came, and killed innocent people.

Dratted humans. Why couldn't things be simpler, like when he was a pup? Kyokei wasn't old by any stretch of the word, not in youkai eyes, but even when he was little, humans had lacked the respect they had once had. The filth grew above their station, and he had always thought they should fix that. Old Yamato had worshiped his kind as gods, and now, they killed them, murdered them for no reason than that they lived close! That family hadn't even been preying on the humans, to give them reason! His fingers curled into a fist, and he glanced at Damia. She had her heart in the right place, but she wasn't going far enough.

"I want you to lead the delegation, Kyokei. I trust you will do a good job." Damia smiled, and brushed a stray wisp of hair away from her face. She was becoming a good leader, he knew. She had the vision to see the whole idea, and the attention to the smallest detail also needed. Sesshoumaru had been a good leader as well, but….short sighted. He had grown soft. Damia had the right idea.

But every leader needed to have allies to trust, and those who could point out their mistakes. He intended to see that she ruled long enough to change the world. After, when the barbarians were driven from their shores, he could persuade her to see his point of view, he was sure of it. They had to go further than simply driving away the barbarians. The humans forgot themselves, and had risen too far. Now, they would be scorched by the sun.

Of course, first he'd have to persuade her to get rid of that human miko. Nothing showed on his face, and he was also careful to keep his feelings hidden, lest Damia show her displeasure with his distrust of her use of the humans – youkai shouldn't rely on them at all, and privately he gnashed his teeth over Mesau. The human was valuable, but to install her in a place once occupied by a competent member of the family, and set her above even the common youkai...that was what really angered him.

Ah well. The human seemed to know her place well enough. And she had been useful. The miko had prophesied doom brought with the Europeans to her own people, with no response. But to youkai...she'd been heard. As long as she never forgot her place, all was well.

"Thank you, Damia. I will try my hardest." He intended to see this mission out to its fullest. They needed support in the other lands if they were to change the face of Japan. This was an important diplomatic mission. Allies had to be found, for now at least. He would go with this delegation to the East, and do what he could now.

Later, though ...later was different.

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Sorai watched from the tiny alcove as Kyokei left Damia's center of operations, carrying a scroll with him. Nobody seemed to know the niche in the wall existed, and she was the only person here who would fit inside, with her small frame. She'd used it to watch things before.

Sorai blinked. She didn't know quite what to think of things, lately. Everything was so strange! She had always thought Sesshoumaru would outlast the sun; he seemed such a rock of solidarity to the much younger youkai. But it wasn't so. It had been a foolish idea. Sorai wasn't sure she wanted to stay in the palace now, not with Damia here.

Damia didn't trust her. Sorai didn't expect her to. Damia had never trusted her, and neither had the rest of the generals. She wasn't family, like they were, and they were not welcoming of a newcomer, one who had come from the continent. That was the whole reason Damia had put Mesau in her old job. To piss a few people off by elevating a human, and to make sure Sorai didn't start something.

Sorai had stepped down gracefully enough. She didn't really care who was named spymistress, after all. What was important was what the title_ represented_, and stepping back from that official name hadn't taken her knowledge of the job away. She still had her network in place, both personal eyes and ears that only she knew about, and the Western network. And they reported some interesting things to her still, even if Mesau thought she knew everything. No one could hope to learn all the secrets of the job, not after less than a year to discover them, and certainly not without the former occupants cooperation in the matter. Sorai hadn't offered Mesau help, and Mesau hadn't asked for it.

For starters, she knew that Sesshoumaru had been killed by Damia. Which was why she wasn't sure she wanted to stay…

She wished Sesshoumaru was still alive. He'd been the only one who seemed to trust her loyalty, in this place.

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_There we go; another chapter. w00T! I think this is the first time Damia shows up…hope you like the brief glimpse. Lol. _

_More 'dry political info' for you, and some other characters... I hope they work out. I need them, if for no other reason than that Japan would be severely under populated without them. Hopefully, people don't mind them being there too much. _

_Thank you for all the lovely reviews last chapter, people! Feel free to comment on this one as well._


	20. ch19:Ruby Slippers

**:: Ruby Slippers ::**

In the middle of the night, Kagome woke, staring out at the dying embers of the fire. Shippo was nearby, curled into a sleeping mass of fur and adorable child's features. Kaede was opposite the fire, asleep as well. Kagome closed her eyes, and sat up slowly, not wanting to wake either of them. There was something she had to do.

She knew it wasn't the brightest idea to go wandering around at night, but, just this once, it was important. She dressed, and took along her bow, wanting even the minimal protection it offered. The quiver slipped over her back in a familiar way.

She moved her hands in the dark, until they rested on her worn backpack, and she let her fingers slide down to the bottom, to something that she had packed away carefully this morning, knowing that she would eventually go to the god-tree. It was time to act on the feelings that had been building in the back of her mind for a few weeks, now, ever since she and Hojo had broken up.

Much as she loved him, she couldn't allow the memory of Inuyasha to overshadow the rest of her life. He'd have wanted her to be happy, she knew, and pining after someone who had rejected her so often was not a happy thing. She had to let it go.

Wrapping Inuyasha's fire rat cloak around her, Kagome took one last look at the dying fire, and the two sleepers nearby, before stepping outside.

Cool night air brushed past her shoulders as she hurried along, inching past the perimeter. The red of the cloak had become black in the absence of light, and with its aid, Kagome was little more than a shadow herself. Inky night entangling her, Kagome was confident that, even with Inuyasha gone, the fire rat haori would protect her while she went to visit him. And she had remembered her bow, for once. She ought to be okay for a few hours.

The forest passed by in a blur, a tangle of moonlit branches and stretched nerves. Even though she was venturing out at night, she was not going to be taken unawares. That had happened far too often before, and she wouldn't let it happen tonight. Inuyasha wasn't here for her anymore, and she was sure Sesshoumaru was not going to charge in on a white horse and save her either. It was time to be a little more independent, on this trip into the past. Kagome was a mature young woman now, and she would take responsibility for herself.

At last, the god-tree came into view. Kagome slowed from her brisk walk, into a slower, more thoughtful stride. She slowly approached the tree, and placed a hand on the bark, looking up.

She'd seen Inuyasha here for the first time… Right there, where the bark was still just a little worn. If she closed her eyes, the picture was there, as clear as though she'd stepped back in time.

"Hello, Inuyasha. I've come back…" She'd come to say goodbye. She was ready to do it, at last. Kagome smiled sadly. Goodbye. It meant so many things, and each of them touched her now, was thought about as the seconds ticked on. No more hoping, questioning, trying to blame him...or herself. Let it all go.

There was no answer to her soft voice from the foot of the tree, where she could just make out a stone marker hiding in the shadows. She hadn't expected a reply; the silence spoke far more elegantly than mere words. Kagome knelt down in front of it, looked at the pale first flowers of spring in her hands, and gently placed them by the stone. She could no longer remember where she'd picked the flowers up, but they looked right, in front of the grey granite, lightly dusted with lichen.

Fingers traced the kanji carved into the rock; this stone marker hadn't been complete when she'd left. Miroku had gotten about as far as carving out the name, and had merely planned the rest. Strangely enough, she'd never noticed this small marker at the shrine. She wondered why it wasn't still there…

"Inuyasha...I came to say goodbye. And...to tell you..." She closed her eyes, and bent her head. "I'm sorry. Sorry for everything that's happened. If I'd just been a little stronger…" Kagome opened her eyes, and blinked away the tears. "I'm sorry for doubting you."

She stared at the stone marker, eyes following the blurred, adrenalin tinged battle of another time, the unnaturally vivid green and red of grass, the slipperiness of dew underfoot, and the copper-iron stink of death. Once you'd smelled blood like that, you never forgot. Never…

And for a long time, Kagome sat as though stone herself, at last crying it all out, letting it go. She'd not let go for so long… She'd gone on with her life, but she'd never forgotten, never forgotten at all.

Inuyasha and the feudal era lay next to her heart, within her soul, and they would never go away. She accepted it, now, and understood; Inuyasha was gone, and even though she'd come back home, _he_ was never coming back…

But…as she eventually stopped, Kagome slowly realized that he wasn't gone. She knew he would forever be in her memories. Nothing could take those away. He would be alive in her heart, alive in others. None was truly gone until the last person who remembered their smile faded away, or forgot. And Kagome knew she would never, _could_ never, forget Inuyasha.

And somewhere, she was sure, he was smiling. Death wasn't an ending, but a part of the endless circle. Without death, there was no life. Without shadow, there was no light. And without pain, without sorrow, there was no happiness.

Kagome smiled ever so slightly though the tears. No, he wasn't gone…he would never be completely gone. And neither would the feudal era that had become her home.

"I've missed you, Inuyasha. So much has happened…" Naraku was dead. Inuyasha had died knowing that. It must have been some consolation, at least. "Everything we worked for…bringing down Naraku, fixing the Shikon… it's all come true."

So much had happened…

Kagome smile grew a little wider, and she took a photo out of her pocket, placing it gently beside the flowers, anchoring it against the wind. "There's so much I want to tell you…"

And while the moon rose and set, she sat with Inuyasha, pouring everything out.

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Kagome opened her eyes slowly, squinting against the bright light. She sat up slowly, and a blanket slid off of her. She frowned at it, still groggy and exhausted after the late night.

She glanced at her watch. Nine in the morning…she didn't have to be back at home till later today, at about seven.

She sighed and lay back for a moment. Once she came here for good, except for visits to family, she would be able to focus on training…and…she would be _home_. Kagome grinned happily. Home at last…

Screw ruby slippers…you just needed a good sword, a Shikon, and a rather ill tempered youkai lord…

She sighed, and peeled off the messy blankets. The curtain over the door wavered, and Kaede came in. "Oh, you're awake? I have something for you."

Kagome blinked. What could…?

"Here. If you're going to train with me, you should look the part, don't you think?" Kaede moved slowly across the room, and pulled out a plain white and red set of clothing from behind her back, much like the ones the older miko wore. "I know you're not precisely a miko, but I believe you will be able to wear these with pride in a few weeks."

Kagome stared at the outfit. It was beautiful, she couldn't deny that. It was genuine hand-woven tsumugi silk, and dyed a brilliant red.

It was also exactly what Kikyou had once worn.

In fact…Kagome was quite certain that these same clothes had once belonged to either Kikyou or Kaede herself when she was younger.

And she was not going to wear them. If she became a miko, it would _not_ be because of what Kikyou had once been. It would be on her own terms. It would be because she, Kagome, wanted to become a miko in her own right. Not to be a second Kikyou.

Just Kagome.

She looked at the clothes. They were a wonderful gift…why, in her own time, hand-woven tsumugi like this cost a fortune…but…

Kagome looked at them longingly, wishing she could sell them to Urahara. He'd pay her a lot for these. She frowned, and gave herself a mental shake. Ungrateful…!

But she couldn't accept them.

"Kaede…I…I can't wear those. If…if I'm going to be a miko, I want it to be for me." She wouldn't wear that red hakama again. Not _her_ uniform…

_Kagome's_ uniform was green. Opposite to the red. But complimentary as well. When she became a miko, she would wear white and green. Red was too close to blood, to thwarted love and life. Green meant a new beginning.

"I have a green hakama and a gi at home I was going to get, as well as some plain white practice clothes…slacks, and things. They're much better for practicing. Silk would get wrecked. And Kikyou…"

Kaede smiled softly. She hadn't thought…Kagome didn't want to be her sister. Kikyou was gone. "Keep it anyway. Perhaps one day you will find a use for them." She certainly couldn't …the clothes didn't fit her, and nobody else was going to wear them. She didn't need to sell them for money, since she was well enough off. The only person they were of any use to was Kagome. "Do whatever you like."

"But…I…I can't take them!"

Kaede smiled. "But nothing. You've done a lot for me by becoming my pupil. I was worried no one would have the gift or inclination to follow the path of the miko after me. If I die, they have no one. And they need their miko more than ever right now. Sango and Miroku mean well, but the monk won't fill the gap left by a miko, if none follows me."

Kagome blinked against the sudden moisture in her eyes. "But I haven't done anything to deserve these! I would never wear them, I _guarantee_ it…and…and I was so ungrateful…to…I was thinking of selling those for money for my family, even. I'm horrible…"

Kaede's face crinkled with a wrinkly smile, as she laughed. "Then make sure you get a good bargain! Times are hard on us all." She didn't mind what Kagome did with the clothes. They were Kagome's now. And she had long ago realized that she could not hold onto Kikyou, onto the past, forever. Kaede had to live in the present too.

Kagome stared at her, completely stunned. Kaede had given her permission… for…

She grinned. It was good to be home…

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Kagome sipped at the stew Kaede had made, and watched as Sango and Miroku came into the room. Sesshoumaru was not far behind them. He sat down next to the fire.

"Finally you're awake." Kagome certainly slept a lot. But then again, humans needed a lot of sleep…and she had been working hard the past week, always reading the scrolls when she should have been resting…

Miroku grinned. "Yes. And now, I think you should tell us what you found out last night, Sesshoumaru."

Sango smoothed her green kimono, and sat forwards. There hadn't been enough time last night to learn anything. So what had Sesshoumaru found?

"I suppose." Sesshoumaru looked around the room before his eyes came to rest on Kagome. "I did find a few things. Most of it is merely confirmation of what I already suspected, but I never dreamed it would be this close to breaking point…"

Sesshoumaru related all that had passed between him and Bokusenou, while everyone listened closely. When he had finished, Kaede sat back with a sigh.

"I had heard rumors of unrest on the wind, but nothing like this…"

"Same here." Sango's eyes narrowed. She didn't have as many dealings with the youkai these days. She and Miroku had elected not to return to her own village for the time being, not until they had a family to drive away the ghosts that lay so unquietly. Father, mother, her friends…

Kohaku.

She closed her eyes. Kagome wasn't the only one to lose someone very loved on that reddened day so long ago.

But that was past. She had the present to attend to. Sango had made her peace with her little brother shortly after his death. In a way, he had been gone already. Death had been a relief.

"Do you have any other contacts?" This Bokusenou might have given them all a great deal of information through Sesshoumaru…actually, Sesshoumaru was being awfully open, all things considered…_completely_ odd…but was there more?

"A few. They are farther away, and may know less. There are not many people I wish to ask, you understand. I do not want Damia to know of my return until I am ready for what she will send against me."

As soon as she knew he'd escaped, she'd send Mesau after him, or a few trusted assassins. She would start the attack on the Europeans and the South as well, if she wasn't close to doing so already. He couldn't afford to force her hand.

Perhaps…if he could get a better disguise… He could ask for another necklace, and head towards the village of Niigata. It was the closest to his own capitol, and not too far from the city of Aizu either. Not that it was really a village…just a meeting point, a place with a few permanent residences and a name. The population that supposedly lived in the town was, in reality, scattered in small groups and clans around the area. But the 'village' was close, and had places he could skulk around and ask questions in. Provided Kagome was able to disguise him well enough, of course. Maybe Kaede would know…

He stopped suddenly. What was he doing? He did not need _her_ help. He most certainly did _not _need the older miko's help, and he could scarcely remember a time when he'd been so open with information upon meeting strangers, much less human ones! What had gotten into him?

Kagome, that's what. She was becoming somewhat of a bad influence. Perhaps he should push her away, move on. He didn't need her, her scrolls, or a necklace. But he couldn't…he had the scrolls to return to, and her seemingly endless collection of CD's. And really, when you got right down to it, she wasn't bad company…

He'd been around her for _quite_ long enough. She'd gotten far too close for anyone's good. Wretched woman. But he couldn't _fix_ it…oh, damnit…damnit damnit damnit…

"So what do we do then?" Miroku sat back, and sighed. Idly, he watched the end of Sesshoumaru's tail flicking back and forth, much like an irritated cat's would. He wondered why Sesshoumaru was helping them so much. He had to loathe even being here, from what Miroku knew of him. He didn't like humans, right? So why was he still here? Was he that desperately in need of allies? It rather sounded like he was… Or perhaps he'd realized that they were involved in this too. Or even…gods forbid…Sesshoumaru was actually _accepting_ human help…

Miroku grinned. Well, Sesshoumaru ought to be used to it by now. The youkai had survived on Kagome's charity long enough. Miroku laughed quietly, deep in his throat. The wheel of fortune turned, and what was once high was brought low. Oh how the mighty youkai fell…

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Some time after their latest war council, Kagome followed Kaede to the practice field the older miko had constructed outside the village. Sesshoumaru had left, for information unknown, and Sango had been trying to get Miroku to find her some shrimp. With wasabi. And not just _any_ wasabi either, but the best, hottest wasabi that had ever been made. With rare spices. And a silver platter. And jeweled chopsticks…

Kagome shook her head and laughed, remembering Miroku's slightly wild expression as she'd left. He'd been tearing the whole town apart looking for such a thing…She giggled, then squinted at the far end of the clearing, where a wooden board had a crudely painted circle on it.

"I wonder if ye have improved any in the year since I saw ye last. I want ye to aim at that target."

Kagome shaded her eyes against the sun. "I'll try." She should be able to hit this. She hadn't done as much practicing as she'd meant to, but she had noticed her arrows and accuracy had improved dramatically since the day she sealed the well. Or rather, the day Kikyou died - for good. Kagome had never been operating at full power, she realized. Kikyou had been skimming some of it off for her own use…

Maybe that was why the seal on the well had been so strong. She'd had the completed Shikon _and_ all her power to use without even realizing it. No wonder she'd overdone it just a bit…

She drew back the bow, and sighted along the arrow, towards the target. She'd held herself back at home when practicing, not wanting to have someone wander by and see a small girl shooting purple comets. It just wouldn't do. But here…

Kagome exhaled, letting the arrow fly towards the bulls-eye. The bowstring snapped smartly against her arm, and she winced. She'd taken to using an archer's arm guards, on occasion, but she'd forgotten them in the mad rush to be home. Something to get later today... She watched as the arrow vibrated merrily from the crudely painted target, near dead on center.

"Good, good. Now, back up fifty paces or so…" Kagome had improved, a bit. She was more powerful as well. As she learned to refine her power, and temper it, she might grow ever stronger. At the very least, she'd have more control, which counted for more than brute force. The right lever could do more than raw power ever could. Kaede smiled. She had wanted someone to follow in her footsteps for a long time, and when Kagome had come, she'd seemed almost too good to be true.

Kagome had been, in fact. Inuyasha was always dragging her off somewhere before Kaede could teach the girl anything. But now, she was back, and Inuyasha wasn't going to interrupt…

Kaede sighed slightly. She wished the brash hanyou was still around. She'd missed him. It hadn't been easy to accept him, but once she had, it had seemed as though he'd always been there. (Or at least, always there in an _animated_ form, not pinned to a tree.)

Only now he wasn't.

She watched Kagome shoot from further away, and nodded slightly. She would have to make up for lost time then, wouldn't she? She had a feeling that this business with the youkai was more than it seemed. Kagome might need all she could teach her, in the weeks to come.

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Mrs. Higurashi read the note again. Her eyes lingered on the thin scrap of loose-leaf, before trailing to the door. Kagome was gone, again. She'd left for the feudal era, taking Sesshoumaru with her. She'd gone yesterday morning, and the note had said she'd be back today near dinnertime.

It was going to start all over again. The worrying, the lying awake at night, the wondering when her daughter would come home...

_If_ she would come home.

The relief at seeing her safe and well, and the terrible loss of letting her daughter walk away, into a well that might swallow her baby girl forever...

How had she been able to let her go? In the beginning, it had all been a feudal fairy tale. Oh, look, there's a well that lets you travel though time. Oh, my, a boy with the cutest looking dog ears… And you say he's a _hanyou_? My…

It wasn't a fairy tale. Or at least, not the Disnified version. In reality things were a little bit bloodier than that. More Grimm. She'd slowly come to realize where her daughter went, and what she'd been doing. It had horrified her that she'd so blithely let her daughter march off into gods-knew-what historical battle like that. People _died_ there!

But she'd done it before. She hadn't stopped her, not even when Kagome's marks fell. She'd just bought grandpa a medical textbook. And Sakura Higurashi was going to let her daughter go again, she knew. There were some things you just had to do. Kagome might have been only 15 when she began time traveling, but by now she was a woman near grown. She was capable of making her own decisions, and mature enough to know which were good ones. Her mother could only watch by now, and worry silently among the shadows.

Souta poked his head in. "Grandpa wants to know if you want him to make dinner, or me." Souta made a face. He'd been rather surprised to hear the old man offer to make dinner. Maybe he was trying to make up for all the trouble there had been since he'd gotten home from visiting. Of course, if grandpa was the one cooking, they might survive Friday night's meal for a change…Souta hated having to eat his own cooking.

"That would be fine, yes. He should probably start now…I want to have dinner ready for when Kagome gets home."

"Alright. I'll tell him." Souta vanished around the corner of the doorway, and back up the stairs.

Sakura Higurashi sighed, and read the note again. She looked up tiredly as grandpa's footsteps entered the room, and stopped in front of the stove.

"You know, I think this time I'm just going to say she went to the hospital for a month." He wasn't going to think up any more medical reasons for Kagome. She wasn't in school, and she'd quit work. She'd taken care of most of the loose ends herself. All he needed to do was say she was in a hospital somewhere, and contagious, and no one would wonder…she'd been 'sick' so often, after all…anything could happen. He grinned slightly as the water started to boil.

He'd have to dust off all his medical texts…maybe he'd talk to that nice young Hojo, ask to borrow his doctors texts, or ask him to help…Hojo should know about illnesses he could use as excuses…

And best of all, that youkai…pest…was gone!

"Oh, father, could you make enough for five people tonight? Kagome might bring Sesshoumaru with her…"

Grandpa's face fell, and he winced. "Ah…"

"That's good. And no more spiking the food. I can't stomach another pot full of inky rice…" Sakura shuddered slightly. Souta's cooking was bad enough without her father 'helping' it along the way…

On the stove, the pot bubbled in a subdued hiss of steam, echoing through the quiet household.

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Kagome sighed, and wiped her forehead slightly. Kaede was a strict taskmistress when she wanted to be. Kagome had done more practice today than she'd done in a long, long time. It would take a while to get into the swing of things, to be able to rise with the dawn and train till sundown.

She finished tidying up, and looked through her backpack one more time, carefully packing the silk miko outfit. Kagome sat back on her heels after storing a few of her things in the corner, and emptied the rest of her belongings she'd brought to the past with her into her corner of Kaede's hut. Kagome was going to stay there for the next few weeks.

So. That meant bringing back everything she would need. Arm guards, and a bag of persona effects. And chocolate. She'd promised more for Shippo, plus a pack of crayons, and Miroku had pleaded with her to bring some for him, just in case Sango decided she needed chocolate again.

She fingered the sleeve of the silken outfit Kaede had given her, carefully folding it away. She was going to take it back with her tonight, and visit Urahara. She'd not leave her family in the lurch while she wasn't there to help out with a job. Something like this ought to help a _lot_. Hand-woven tsumugi silk...

Kagome did not fancy suddenly coming out of the well, and finding her family had been forced to sell the house while she was away. It was important that she support her family, but every bit as important was protecting her home, here.

So. That left getting to the 'present', and finding Sesshoumaru. She was going to ask him if he wanted to come back with her to see the scrolls. He had returned to the village late in the afternoon while she was sweating away with archery practice and basic meditation, so he ought to be nearby.

Kagome hoisted the bag onto her back, and set off looking. She found him fairly quickly, lounging in a tree just outside the village, reminding her, rather sharply, of Inuyasha. Kagome blinked, and forced the comparison away. Sesshoumaru would not have appreciated it, and Inuyasha would have turned over in his grave, surely…

Even if, deep down, they were more alike than either cared to admit.

Sesshoumaru watched her come, wondering where she was going. He'd watched the tail end of her lesson, and privately thought she had a long way to go before she was even a competent miko, much less strong or skilled. For a beginner, not bad, but she was not a miko yet...

"Hey, Sesshoumaru. Could you come down for a minute?"

…was that an order, or a question? "What do you want?"

Kagome narrowed her eyes. The 'high and mighty' Sesshoumaru was back full force now he was home, wasn't he? Not that the disdainful side of him had ever really left...

Just for a moment, Kagome wished she knew how to make a subduing necklace. She felt like 'sitting' Sesshoumaru quite a bit right now... "I'm going home for the night. Once I get back, I'm going to be here for a long time. Do you want to take a look at those old scrolls before I stop going back? I can take you with me…"

Now that he thought about it, he remembered her itinerary. Go to 'past', come back, say goodbye, come back to 'past.' She was right about one thing. There wasn't much room in there for reading scrolls. Or to have one last go at the CD player before he left it behind for good…

"I see." There had to be something in those scrolls he could use. Somewhere in there had to be the information about the youkai disappearing. There_ had_ to be… "I shall come."

"Well, hurry up then. I'm leaving right now."

Sesshoumaru dropped noiselessly out of the tree, and followed Kagome towards the well, silent as a falling leaf.

She glanced back toward him to make sure he was, indeed, following her, then walked off toward the well without a second glance. She waited for him to catch up at the lip of the stony construct, and held out her hand.

Sesshoumaru took it, and jumped. They fell past the boundaries of time together, and emerged in the roofed-over well house of Kagome's own era.

Sesshoumaru dropped Kagome's fingers as though they burned him, and flew out of the well. He couldn't escape the thought that this was too close for comfort... and that roof looked about to fall in.

Kagome watched him go, and put her hands on her hips. Leave her to climb out on her own, would he? Well, she'd show him she didn't need him…

Sesshoumaru slid the screen door aside, and stood, once more breathing in the acidic air of this time. He'd discovered where some of this era's unique blend of nasty perfumes came from, but not all.

Kagome came out behind him, and slid back the door. She sighed softly. Time to wrap up loose ends… she grinned and poked Sesshoumaru in the back of the neck as her stomach growled. "I think it's about time for dinner, don't you?"

Sesshoumaru glared slightly, but relented as he caught the smell of cooking. He'd been delighted with the opportunity to hunt this afternoon, and had made the most of it, but Sesshoumaru did not turn up his nose at fish. Unless it had been slathered in fire-sauce again...

Well, if it had, he'd just have to explain that eating nearly half a deer _did _have a tendency to make one rather full…

Kagome led the way back to her house, and smiled as her mom opened the door. She'd been watching for her daughters return home.

"Kagome! I wondered where you were…" Sakura Higurashi gave Kagome a hug, and smiled at Sesshoumaru over her daughter's shoulder. He really was lucky to have a tail, wasn't he…? "I thought you might be back. Grandpa's cooking dinner, and he made enough for everyone. A special dinner to send you off..."

Kagome glanced at the stove, and grinned. Steak! She could barely remember the least time she'd had steak...!

Sesshoumaru raised an eyebrow. The old man was cooking _his _dinner? Should he be checking for poison…? His lips quirked slightly. The old man would be rather unpleasantly surprised if that was the case. Sesshoumaru enjoyed immunity to most poisons. Certainly those made by humans were quite useless against him, and he couldn't imagine the old man getting a youkai to lend a hand.

"When are you going back?" She knew Kagome would go eventually, but she wasn't sure how soon. She wanted her to stay, but after this long away from the past, Kagome probably wouldn't want to. Kagome would leave.

Kagome smiled. "I think we need to have a talk once dinner's over, actually. And I have to make a few phone calls…and explain to grandpa that this time, I'm going to be 'away in America' rather than 'sick with the yellow plague.'"

Sakura laughed. "Yes…he did say that one time, didn't he? That's why I got him that medical book…"

Kagome winced. "…and it really helped him think of good excuses, didn't it?" she muttered.

…what was the yellow plague? Sesshoumaru brushed it away as unimportant. If all it did was make humans sick, then it wasn't terribly useful information…

Kagome sighed once they got inside, and poked her head into the kitchen. "Hi grandpa! Whatcha making in there?" She grinned. Souta must have begged off cooking duty tonight…for which her stomach was profoundly grateful…

Grandpa squinted at the boiling pot of rice. "Teriyaki steaks, rice, vegetables.. .a farewell feast."

Kagome smiled sadly. "Yes, it is going away, isn't it...? I'm going to be gone for quite a while, this time. Which is why a 'trip to America' is a good idea, in light of the fact that I don't want to be 'in the hospital' again for so long."

Kagome turned around, and saw Sesshoumaru had disappeared. Probably up in her room reading scrolls, if she knew anything. She went upstairs, and peered in. He was sitting on the floor as though he'd never left, buried in paper.

"Before you're done, and before I go, I think I should pack all those up to take back, don't you think?" Kagome's arm encompassed the whole stack of scrolls, and the box. It made no sense to leave them at the shrine, when they might be useful in the past. "I'll organize them after dinner."

Sesshoumaru smiled slightly. "Indeed." Perfect. He could try and figure out all this at his leisure now, instead of trying to cram it all in tonight. He adjusted the volume on the CD player, and sat back to read some more before dinner, at a slightly slower pace now.

Kagome grinned, and crossed over to the desk where Shiro still was. He was no longer the scrawny thing he'd been when she'd found him... he was getting to be near grown. Adult feathers were growing in, and he was at that slightly ugly stage of adolescent birds, half baby fluff and half real feathers. She checked his water, and smiled. Souta must have been in here recently to look after him like she'd asked in the note. She'd have to ask him a big favor, and see if he wouldn't take care of Shiro on a more permanent basis... Souta was pretty good with animals.

She fed Shiro, and turned to leave. She had other things to do as well. Move her stuff from the spare room back to her room. She wouldn't bother putting it away, just moving it out of the spare room. Then, make some calls and tell people she was going. She'd have to call Hojo too, tell him what was going on. Have some quality family time before she left.

Kagome turned and left, to get started on all that. Maybe after dinner she would wander down to Urahara's shop and find out about what Kaede had given her. If she didn't sell it tonight, she'd have to get Mom to do it some other time, maybe. Or get Souta to go along... he was surprisingly sharp when it came to business. He'd know exactly what the expensive silk was worth, and argue the price paid to a fairly large amount above and beyond what they were worth. Finally putting those arguing skills to good use, for once…

So much to do…

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_Arg. Okay, so I lied. This chapter was more filler. I forgot about it….thought this chapter was more interesting. Turns out that was chapter 20. (should ready read back over what I've written to refresh my memory…) _

_Alright. So. Hopefully this one is well received, despite the fact nothing much of substance besides the scene with the god-tree occurred. Thank you so much to the people who reviewed last chapter, too! I feel loved, now. You guys write such awesome reviews! Thanks so much! (big grin)  
_


	21. ch20:Riverdance

**:: Riverdance ::**

Kagome frowned in concentration, watching the play of light across the small paper dolls in front of her intently. Slowly, she could feel the power building, flowing along the proper channels…until it suddenly caught, and held fast, freezing into position across the rustling slips of paper.

She grinned as one of the paper dolls became a miniature copy of herself, springing up like a Jack in the box, and walking across the grass without a care in the world.

Kaede smiled at her efforts. "And that is how you do a proper shikikami. Your concentration needs to be stronger, and while you visualized the subject, you didn't quite get the right size…unless you wanted the results to be this small?"

"Ah…no…" Kagome winced.

"Well, work on those things then…but other than that, you have excellent technique. I'm impressed with the detail ye've managed, even if it is small."

Kaede peered at the tiny Kagome, currently fallen over in a clump of wiry weeds. The real Kagome grinned, and looked closer.

The miniature picked herself up, and waved merrily at the two larger people, smile visible even from a bare 15 centimeters of height. The larger Kagome grinned harder. She was rather proud of herself. It had taken her a long time to pick up on the visualization aspect.

Once she'd gotten it though, she'd taken off. This particular shikikami, if large enough, probably could have passed for her from a distance, maybe even on closer examination! Now, if she could make it large enough…it probably wouldn't take too long, since detail was more important that size, but she'd deal with that later…

Kagome sat back and grinned harder. "What happens if I used someone else as the basis for this? I mean, I was trying to call up something like myself, and I had a lock of my own hair folded into the paper, but what happens if I want to use something like this to scout, or to imitate someone?" She could remember coming across paper creations like these before. That dark miko had had one, and even Kikyou had had helpers. But they hadn't been based on a person, had they?

"To create a likeness, you need either the essence of that person…a lock of hair, a personal artifact, or simply a very strong image in your mind. It is easier with some part of that person as a basis, but more versatile with visualization, if you can do it. To create a shikikami servant, a scout in the field, or a helper not based on someone, like my sister once did, is similar, though more mentally draining. Visualize it, feed it the power, and it will be done. The intent is the most important part, and the focus to do it."

Kaede smiled. "Why don't you go practice on your own for a bit, or go have some free time? I've been working you pretty hard these past few weeks, and I think you've finally earned a break. I'm going to go check up on supper."

'_Isn't that the truth…'_ Kaede had been almost as bad as her drill sergeant of a supervisor at the museum! The day she arrived back home, after that last supper at her family's shrine, she'd begun a rigorous round of training. She would never have suspected that the older woman had it in her to be this focused on training. For the past weeks…almost a _month_, she realized with jolt…Kaede had spent all her time not devoted to the duties of her station getting Kagome to practice, teaching the younger girl to first recognize and control her own power, and then to use it.

She now knew why her first attempts to make an illusionary necklace had managed to melt the plastic rosaries at home into the carpet. For a start, plastic wasn't designed to hold that much spiritual energy. She had been using a sledgehammer to kill a spider mite. Secondly, tying power onto something…that wasn't the concept of illusion at all. It was more simply feeding power to what you were making, and shaping it to your own will. A lot of miko power wasn't fighting with the spiritual energy to do what you wanted, but guiding it. Tying knots did other things.

On the other hand, she also knew that the necklace Sesshoumaru had on was extremely powerful, since she'd taken the 'sledgehammer on insect' approach. Which was good…she'd caught him using it to snoop around a few times. It would hold up under even the closest scrutiny. It had made her rather amused to know he was still using it, but she could see why. He was far too practical to allow pride to stand in the way of collecting pieces to the puzzle they were all embroiled in.

So far, they hadn't found much out. Sesshoumaru's original plan, which had been to assassinate Damia, hadn't really been feasible. After he'd given up on that approach, he'd said he was working on calling some sort of council, and contacting people down South, but that was all she knew. There hadn't been much time to sit down and talk, lately. He was always gone scouting, and she was always busy with practicing. Last week though, he'd said he was on to something.

Kagome intended to go with him to the south. A months worth of training wasn't going to make her into a miko genius, but she could still do _something_.

Kagome didn't want to let him down, or fail. She wanted to prove she was worth all the time Kaede had spent on her training, and prove to herself she was strong enough. And... to prove to Sesshoumaru that humans weren't worthless, that she wasn't worthless. Of late, he'd taken to avoiding her, she suspected... and that would never do. Kagome needed to find him to tell him she was coming south, like it or not.

Hopefully, he'd be around later, and she could ask them. Kagome was pretty sure she knew where to find him this afternoon.

That decided, Kagome carefully knelt down in front of the tiny shikikami, and touched it with a fingertip, drawing the animating power back into herself, letting the paper fall to the ground devoid of life.

She grinned. She should show Sesshoumaru…she could even make a shikikami of him, and make Fluffy Junior do Riverdance or something! A whole army of tiny Sesshoumarus, doing a Celtic line dance in unison! Kagome laughed, and stood up. He might not appreciate the humor, but it would make for good practice!

And then, there was something else. She wanted to show him something she had made similar to his illusionary necklace, but different. She wondered if she'd made it well enough that it would make the wearer impervious to detection, even by him…

She frowned. He had been gone for the past week, and had only reappeared today, looking rather graver than usual. She didn't know why, since she had been busy. He had spoken to Sango and Miroku since, but she hadn't seen any of them after that, and had gotten involved in archery to the point of forgetting.

What had he found out? Over the past month, he'd disappeared while she worked on training in between rounds of youkai attacks. Those were becoming ever more pressing. Sango was nearly too far along in her pregnancy to be of much help, by this point. Kagome had asked her about learning some of the fighting techniques youkai exterminators used, but that wouldn't work till Sango was up to it, in a few months more time.

Sango still insisted she could defend the village, but it grew harder all the time to use her sword, or Hiraikotsu. At 8 months along, she was beginning to slow...

Kagome started walking in the direction of the tree Sesshoumaru tended to sleep in. Perhaps she would find him there.

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Sesshoumaru leaned back, thoughts churning. Everywhere, it seemed, he was blocked. Nobody could tell him what Damia was planning specifically, or when. All he'd managed to find out about was the current balance of power.

Sorai had ceased to be the spy mistress of the West, perhaps because Damia did not fully trust her. Sesshoumaru did not know for sure why that was, only the results.

Perhaps there was an edge to be gained if he could contact Sorai. Mesau had been given the title of spy mistress instead, and for a human to hold such a position—in a Purist camp, no less!—was a grave insult to Sorai.

Kyokei had been given a promotion as well, and was now apparently second in command only to Damia, and had been sent as an ambassador to the North, after his journey East had failed to give results.

Of the rest of his extended family, he had heard little, in many cases only news of a death, or that they still lived. Damia had spared the eldest member of the clan, Sonezaki. She had also left Tomoe and Ashikaga untouched because of their age, but others hadn't been so lucky. Mito had died, and Hotta. Many of the more prominent servants and retainers, some distantly related or distaff members of the family, had been killed, and over 50 soldiers had been put to death as well, for failing to believe or follow Damia. The youkai who gave him that information had told him about the recruitment going on though the whole Western lands for an ever larger army, to replace that loss. Rumors of a plan to wipe out the newcomers abounded, though he hadn't been able to find much concrete.

It was starting to make the neighbors nervous. The north was in an uproar because of the ambassador they had been sent—Kyokei's silver tongue had been urging the members of the Purist faction there to take control, with some success. If this continued, they would soon fall in behind Damia. Lady Ezo was barely managing to stay in command. Perhaps, they would go entirely beyond her control, and loot and ravage as they pleased. She was hard pressed to stop them, from all accounts.

In the far South of the island, he had heard one of the generals was dismissed because of Purist leanings. Lord Tosa and Lady Satsuma had drawn ranks, and were calling for everyone to stand down. He laughed quietly. He doubted even they believed such a request would be granted. It was Fellowship territory down there, and had been even before he was sealed away. Tosa and Satsuma were neutral, though sympathetic to the fellowship. Then, they had always been more open down there...

The lines had been drawn. So, how could he exploit them?

Sesshoumaru grimaced, and shook his head to clear it of fluff. So far he'd come up with a dozen ways to get rid of Damia on his own – and none would work. He'd found that out within the first week of his return. So, then, that left getting into a position where Damia could not deny a formal challenge, with witnesses. Assuming he was strong enough to pull her down, of course. He still didn't know how strong she would be in a face to face encounter. He might die in the attempt…not that that really mattered. Much.

So. Sesshoumaru had remembered a contact who could get him in touch with Tanuma. Through the southern spy, he could contact Tosa and Satsuma, and get them to help. He was sure they would be willing to listen at the very least. That was what he was going South to do, soon. The only problem lay in getting inside and talking to Lord Tosa and Lady Satsuma without Damia knowing. He knew she had eyes everywhere in the south.

He had not heard anything of Jaken since his return, but he doubted the toad had been killed. He was far too good at looking out for his own interests. But, he would be loyal. He had never wavered in that, and he would know who could be trusted. Yet, how to get to him? Non starter, there.

The whole thing was a bit of a dilemma, and the only possible solution that came to mind was of concealing himself as a far lesser youkai, and sneaking into places more inhabited. But to do that, he needed an illusion, a concealment. He had no way to access the few items his former spy mistress had used in the field to hide her agents when needed, leaving just Kagome and her arts.

He hadn't yet gotten the nerve to ask for something. He knew he had to, knew he couldn't keep avoiding Kagome forever, but... Sesshoumaru knew he couldn't hide from her forever. It was just... he was strangely wary of her, now, and he could hardly think of_ why_. Sesshoumaru had expected her feeling of familiarity, and unnatural closeness, to fade once they arrived home. But it hadn't. For some reason, he remained attached to the little miko. And it scared him. He couldn't think of a way to leave her behind for good. He needed her help, and this place was a good base of operations, for the time being. Practicality dictated he stay here.

He had to ask for help, soon. There had to be a way to see if she would be willing to provide help without... without what? He didn't know. But he had to do it. He should have gotten a move on already, and it was far past time he did so. In fact…

Sesshoumaru paused. If he wasn't mistaken, there was Kagome coming over the hill right now. She waved and started coming over towards him, and he sat up straighter. Ii seemed she had a unnatural sense for finding him...

"There you are! I've been looking for you everywhere! I wanted to try something out…and show you something I think might be useful!" Kagome pulled out a string of polished onyx stones, and dangled them in front of his nose.

"Watch this!" She grinned, and wrapped them around her wrist, seeming to fade as she did so till he could not plainly see any trace of her.

While he was slightly impressed with the optical illusion (it was as though she was invisible…he couldn't see her anywhere, or, come to think of it, hear her moving) he had to sigh and shake his head. She might have remembered to take care of noise, and such, but she had forgotten something with smell.

Things wavered between a total loss of smell around her, even to the vegetation, which was slightly suspicious, and then bounced back to 'normal', with scent mapping her position in his mind. He wasn't sure why it was fluctuating like that, but it would give her away without fail in the face of a youkai who had the smallest bit of nasal ability.

He pretended to ignore her as she circled around behind him, and caught her arm easily as she made a mock attack.

Kagome winced as he let go of her. "I thought you wouldn't be able to see me…or even hear me! I even took care of the miko power too and tried to hide it…why didn't it work?"

"Because you forgot how good a nose I have. I might not be able to see you, but I didn't have to." If she would just fix that, it would be the most useful thing one could have! His lips turned up slightly at the corners. Kagome always amazed him with her strange, novel ideas. It was one of the more interesting things about her. She came at a problem with a totally different mindset than anyone he knew. He had never thought of making someone invisible or inaudible like that. His plan had been to conceal himself as a normal member of society. Kagome was a genius!

…not that he was going to mention that.

Of course, he still needed something to act as a mask. Making yourself invisible and inaudible was not conductive to performing an interrogation.

"If I had thought of that, I would have done it too! I can…it's just going to take time. It took forever to hide the miko power, and if I have to start over, I'll bet it takes longer to work the changes in. I'll do it some other time." Kagome sighed, and flopped down on the grass beside Sesshoumaru, careful not to step on the length of tail spread in a circle around him. "And here I thought I had the ideal spying thingy…"

Kagome grinned, and decided not to tell Sesshoumaru she'd gotten the brainwave while thinking about Souta playing James Bond with the cheats on, or the many sword-and-sorcery books she owned. Games had become useful at last! She'd just had to add in the cover-up for spiritual power.

Hmm…maybe she should go ask Souta about things like that…he'd probably give her ideas and to spare for creating a deadly arsenal of bespelled necklaces, weapons, charms and talismans. His mind was far too inventive in that area. She should go back to her own time for a visit, soon. It had almost been a month…she could ask him then. Perhaps, by that time, she might be skilled enough to actually make some of his ideas a reality.

…She'd just have to make sure he never got his hands on the things she _did_ make. He might think it was a lark to be the next best thing to invisible, with such a strong 'don't notice me' necklace. Or maybe not…he wasn't that immature, after all. She could probably trust him. Maybe. It was a problem for later.

She sat up, and pulled a few pieces of paper out of her bag, standing the two dimensional mannequins in a row. If she couldn't fix her beads today, then she'd at least practice her shikikami skills. So far, she hadn't tried to make a copy of anyone but herself. Definitely not a youkai. She hadn't wanted to do anything with Shippo, for fear of a backlash. She'd singed her fingers once, and she wasn't going to hurt Shippo because she goofed up. Sesshoumaru shouldn't mind, much. She doubted he would be seriously hurt if she accidentally singed her 'guinea pig'.

"What are those?" Were they shikikami? Kagome had been telling him about learning how to make them last week, before he went to the South to test the political currents near Nagasaki. He enjoyed hearing about how far she'd come in only a few weeks. But she'd also said they were going badly…

"I finally figured out how to make shikikami. Or at least, mostly. I can do a lot of mini me's with no problem, but I can't do big ones well yet. And I haven't tried making one that looked like anyone else.

Kagome took one of the paper dolls between her fingers, and summoned the tiny Kagome from before. "See?"

Sesshoumaru had a faint ping of premonition…

"I was hoping I could practice on you, if you'll let me."

…He was right.

She was going to turn him into a test dummy again. Probably she'd make them with a piece of hair or something else to animate them. Dangerous, to give that power away. Who knew what she'd do?

But…

He trusted she wouldn't misuse that power. And, if he let her practice on him, he could perhaps propose a deal: make a scouting necklace to his specifications in exchange. If he did that, then he wasn't begging for help, was he? He was making a fair deal. Deep inside, Sesshoumaru knew it was just a sop thrown to his battered sense of pride, but he let himself think the worth exchanged was equal, for the moment.

"Perhaps. If you do something for me."

Kagome narrowed her eyes. What was he playing at? What could he possibly need from her? He'd made it plain over the past month how small her ability was, and that he did not want her help. "Such as…?"

"I need something that would make it easier to move casually among youkai, not simply the few I trust enough to get information from while wearing my normal appearance. Something that would even allow me to get back inside the castle without detection, such as this." Sesshoumaru briefly gestured to the talisman wound around Tenseiga's hilt, the first necklace from Kagome.

Kagome blinked. Well. That sounded simple enough. She'd become quite good at illusion, after all these weeks. She'd gotten nearly as practiced with those as with her bow and arrow. Perhaps that was why shikikami came so easily to her- they were, after all, a type of illusion.

On the other hand, she still had something of a block with barriers… She knew she could make them, since she'd sealed the well to the past, but she hadn't managed to duplicate that feat, aside from trapping herself in a weak ward by accident for a few hours…

"Like the human one?"

"Yes." He hoped it did not take nearly as much trial and error to produce the next 'mask' he wanted to wear.

"Do you want to do the visualization on this one, so you get what you want? I mean, like youkai things. Scents, and covering up youki and things like that. Seeing as you just finished pointing out I goofed up before."

First, that neatly avoided any problems like the…last time, and second, covered all the youkai senses, as she had suggested. Kagome might not think to shield him from the range of sight beyond red through indigo, as some youkai could see in those colors. She would not be able to make a false personal signature in scent, because humans had no concept of it, or of altering youki. She seemed to know this, and had thereby given him the choice. "Perhaps that is best."

"Alright. I'll do it, right after this. All I need from you is some tail fluff, or hair or something, to make the shikikami."

Sesshoumaru nodded, and carefully cut a long few strands of hair for her with a claw. He watched as she fussed over the plain paper dolls, wondering what would happen. He glanced at the tiny copy of Kagome balanced on a pebble, and noted how detailed, how exact a duplicate. Kagome had done well.

One by one, Kagome touched the paper dolls, animating them so that first one, then more, small figures appeared. For now, she did not try to make them to scale. They would suit practicing control over many, shikikami of another person as they were now.

"Oh, hey! It worked! I wonder if…" She'd been able to manipulate some of her shikikami like puppets, before. Not at first. Her initial efforts hadn't created anything complex enough to be directed. She hadn't yet gotten to the stage where her illusions were truly autonomous, with some small amount of vocation on their own. She had to monitor them consciously. So, how about…

Sesshoumaru watched in fascination as the shikikami changed, and took on his appearance, paper filling out to become flesh and blood, if only in seeming, not reality. One of them started waving a miniature Toukijin around, and another grew a small cloud and rose up to around eye level. The third glared distantly, till Kagome paused, and grinned down at all three. It worked!

And now, to make things interesting…

Kagome wondered briefly if Sesshoumaru, while in her time, had ever seen the 'Idol' shows that were popping up everywhere. She smiled brightly. Life had been so boring, this past month. Well, not boring, but…focused. Up at dawn, train till dusk, fall into bed when the day was done. The only interruptions were marauding youkai, and the occasional strategy meeting between her, Sango, Miroku and Sesshoumaru. She felt she was due a bit of fun.

Like creating reality TV in medieval Japan.

Well, if Sesshoumaru hadn't heard of 'Idol' by now, he was going to soon…

Carefully, she brought the three shikikami down to a flat rock, and set up the small shikikami of herself up behind the pebble as the judges panel. The real Sesshoumaru watched with narrowed eyes as she set up a rough stage.

"And now, ladies and gents, time for tonight's show! Who will win the title of…Warring States Era Idol!!" Kagome grinned from ear to ear, and her miniature counterpart did a small bow.

"And, first up…um….Mini Sess Number One, singing…" Kagome thought hard. Songs, artists, what song…?

"…Alice Cooper!! Song title, 'Lost in America!!'"

Wha…?

What the hell was she doing?

Sesshoumaru blinked, watching with a mixture of fascination and horror as the shikikami dubbed 'Mini Sess Number One' took center stage, and proceeded to start singing with a high, small voice, jumping freely around the stage, gesturing with a tail, holding an invisible mike with his good arm.

Distantly, he felt his jaws part a little in bemusement, not sure what to do or think. What, in the names of the gods, was going _on_?

Kagome watched his face with glee, noting that he was so surprised, he'd momentarily dropped the mask. But only for a moment. Immediately, his mouth snapped shut and his pale, delicate features took on an icy tinge. She smiled wider, pleased she'd managed to get though to him. Now, if that was a good thing or not, she wasn't sure…

Kagome laughed, and watched as the song wound to a close. "And the judges say…?"

"8 out of ten!" Squeaked the small Kagome, holding up an invisible card.

"Just 8!?" demanded the small Sesshoumaru imperiously.

"What are you doing?" Sesshoumaru stared hard as the next small figure came forwards, locked arms, somewhat awkwardly, with the other two, and they all launched into some sort of line dance, singing along to something in a foreign tongue.

"It's the Japanese rip off of 'American Idol,' Sesshoumaru. A bunch of people compete for the title of best singer."

Sesshoumaru stared. And stared.

What the hell were the three 'Sesshoumarus' _doing_? He would _never_ act like that…

On one hand, it was faintly amusing. And appropriate. He was a singer, in a way, and he had to admit, seeing himself doing such a…lively…act, even in miniature was…interesting.

On the other hand, it was completely ludicrous. Sesshoumaru, even a copy of him, jumping around like a common madman…?

He quickly came to the conclusion that Kagome had a very warped sense of humor, and might possibly be borderline insane.

He was just about to inform her of that, when the alarm bells began ringing in his head.

Youkai were coming. A great many of them…

"Kagome…"

She looked up. "Yes, I know, you don't like it…oh well…" It had been good while it lasted, at least. Not many people could claim to have seen even a copy of Sesshoumaru rocking out to 'Alice Cooper', with stage lighting provided by a whip of light! Or doing a knockoff of 'Riverdance', or…

"No. Youkai."

"What?" Youkai? Kagome snapped to attention. Another attack, so soon after the last one? "How many, do you think?" Now that she was looking for them, she became aware of the youkai converging in the distance. Mentally, she cursed. Constant vigilance! She should be aware at all times, after all the attacks and training, but somehow, she'd missed the incoming swarm.

It felt like a _lot_ of youkai.

"I'm not sure of their number."

Seconds later, the signal to defend the east palisade rang out.

111111111111111111

Miroku cursed roundly as he cut through another flying menace with his staff. "Sango, get out of here!"

Sango wasn't listening…she stood in the center of the wall, a queen of battle with the enemy dead piled at her feet. Her sword flashed in the sun, making shadows across her face and highlighting the crimson on the blade. With a grunt, she retrieved her Hiraikotsu, and sent the massive weapon flying out again.

Miroku admired the picture, but was quite keenly aware of the one thing wrong…Sango's rather vulnerable looking midline. He fought his way over, till he was nearly back to back with her.

Sango nodded as he came, and shifted so that they could fight together, back to back. A team. She watched the villagers to either side with approval. A few months of training hadn't turned them into the most skilled of samurai, but they at least knew which end of a weapon to point at an enemy.

"Sango, please…don't push yourself so much!" Miroku whispered, in the brief lull.

Sango smiled, and diagonally slashed apart a flying, ugly maw that might have been a head. "Miroku, I _will_ protect this town. I will not let it fall."

'_And I will not let **you** fall_.' Miroku's face grew tight. "Maybe so, but the fact is…" Speeding scraps of paper flew out, burning a circle of ash in the ranks of youkai, "…that… I don't want you hurt, not you, not our child…"

'_Oh, Miroku…I know, I know. But I cannot stand by and watch you fight for our survival alone. As long as I can, I will fight for the future. I will not lose those I love again. I will not lose another home, another family. I will not lose **you.' **_The renewed vigor in her sweeping sword spoke for itself. "I know. But I can't just watch and do nothing."

Miroku sighed, and nearly closed his eyes in dull dismay, and acceptance. He knew why she fought so hard for their new home, and that he could not dissuade her. Every time, it was like this. He would just have to protect Sango as best he could, and pray it was enough…

An arrow sped over the wall, faintly glowing. He followed the line of flight back to where it had come, to where Kaede stood guard over the strongest house in the village, where some of the most vulnerable sheltered out the storm. "I don't see Kagome. Or Sesshoumaru."

Sango laughed, and turned to keep her opponent in view, making the two of them spin together, flesh on flesh, a circle of death. "You know he only steps in if we need it. He's trying to stay hidden, and having some stupid youkai see him fighting isn't going to help. I don't know about Kagome though…" Where was her friend? She hadn't been close when the alarm was sounded, or she'd be here by now, surely…

As soon as her words were left to hang in the air, another arrow appeared, much stronger than the first. It tore across the ranks of enemies, disintegrating the youkai around it with a burning intensity. Kagome had arrived, summoned, it seemed, by their words.

Sango sighed. "She's here. Every little bit will help." Behind her, Miroku nodded, and then shouted, blocking a strike and giving one in return, leaving a red, slimy thing yowling, with the impression of a staff burned into its oily hide.

Kagome ran across to the wall, pausing as a scaled, misshapen creature reared up in front of her. Sesshoumaru was right behind her, she knew, putting on the necklace as he went. It wouldn't do for even one youkai to learn of his presence here. Kagome eyed it warily. It was too close to tag with an arrow, and too far for the small knife she'd taken to carrying around on her belt, and…her eyes widened as it charged.

Too late.

With a cry, she brought up her bow as a shield, and light flared out. The creature before her vanished, beaten down before her power. Kagome drew a shaky breath, eyes slightly wide. She didn't think she'd ever quite get used to seeing something charge blindly at her, wanting to kill her.

She'd learned to work through it. She'd had to. She didn't want to die just yet.

Kagome grinned suddenly. Here she was, standing and watching as her friends held the wall. Hadn't they been the ones to defeat Naraku? Even if…even if Inuyasha was gone, and Shippo was within the shelter, a last ditch defense, they still had some serious firepower between the three of them!

"_Aeiah!!"_ Kagome shouted her defiance, and drew an arrow. She had work to do! She swiftly sent three more arrows after the first, proud at the long way she had come since the first time she'd held a bow.

She looked back briefly at Sesshoumaru, standing with the necklace around his neck, watching her, hiding. "Are you going to help out this time, or not?"

Kagome didn't wait for a reply, but headed off at a steady pace, sending arrows of destruction as she went.

1111111111111111

Sesshoumaru did not answer. He watched the melee below, loath to join in. He had only defended this village once, and then only …hidden… inside this spell of human secrecy.

He did not want to fight in the defense of humans. Besides, they looked to be doing well enough. The only time he had stepped in was when it looked as though Kagome had bitten off more than she could chew. He'd killed the youkai creeping up behind her unseen, and then gone back to watching. Sesshoumaru watched as she made her way towards the wall. Kagome was getting better at fighting, far better than she had ever been at the side of Inuyasha, but he still kept an eye on her.

Bad enough that he was reduced to looking like a human, without battling side by side with a village full of them. Having to hide was torture enough. For this wasn't Tokyo, where the talisman around his throat was necessary…here, it could arguably be thrown away, and he could forget he had ever heard of it. But no. He had kept it. The idea of how low he had sunk revolted him.

His gold-behind-brown eyes narrowed, and he watched Kagome roughly shoving her way through the mass of enemies. She had improved a_ great _deal, he noted. Over the years she had gotten much better, and now that she was a miko-in-training, Kagome was learning at an exponential rate. (Except when it came to barriers, apparently…)

Perhaps, just perhaps, she could help him…but he didn't want her help. No need to put her though what might come, if she remained close to him, or dig himself further down into debt in the process. He still hadn't managed to pay back much of what he already owed for _freeing _him, much less for taking care of him, opening the well, new clothing…the list went on and on, and he fully intended to give it all back. He couldn't allow her to have a hold over him. She was too close... too close...

He sighed, and watched as the battle ground on, leaving the dead in its wake. There were few casualties among the villagers, he noted. Sango had told him of how they had had to learn to fight. They had gotten better at staying alive, with the constant tempering in the crucible fate had dealt.

He watched as Kagome fought her way to where her friends were, and as the tide of battle turned, and the invaders, what was left of them, retreated.

Soon…he had to do something soon. The mob of youkai attacking this place had been growing in number. On his journeys, he had passed human villages razed to the ground. That didn't particularly concern him, until he had discovered the same thing had happened to a youkai town near the Nakasendou road. Traces of bandits with guns, and westerners, had been left behind when he stopped to look. _That_ was worrisome.

It had been only a few people, gathered in a loose community at a crossroads, too small to really be marked on any map, but the fact that the violence had spread that far was terrifying. Before long, it would be more than that.

Much more.

Kagome paused, and wiped her sweat bangs out of her eyes. Something had caught her attention, but it was gone now. She wasn't sure it had even been real. She glanced back up the field and saw Sesshoumaru watching the battle, cloaked in the illusion of humanity, and then cast her eyes over the lines of dirty, blood-smeared villagers lining the palisade. Kaede was there, unharmed, and beyond her Shippo guarded the door to the children's shelter, removed from combat. Her eyes picked out Sango and Miroku easily, and she hurried towards them.

It must have been nothing…

Far above the battle, a flock of crows cackled amongst themselves, eyes scanning the retreat of the youkai and the humans faint cheers of victory before they winged to the north-west, unnoticed.

_111111111_

_Excuses for making Sess an idol? None. Lol. I just wanted something light and entertaining before we plunge into the next round of angst, starting in the next chapter. Mwahahaha._

_See that button, there? The one marked review? _

_(Obey the button!)_

_Adieu, and see you next Thursday. (big grin)  
_


	22. ch21:Crow

**:: Crow ::**

Kagome stirred under the sheets, her face twisted in restless sleep. Pictures flashed though her mind, their meaning present only while in the realm of sleep. On waking, she somehow knew the images would scatter, water droplets on the wax paper of reality, gone as though they had almost, but not quite, never been.

_The woman's face lay in shadow as she bent over the table, long hair obscuring a stout, sturdy frame. Her work hardened hands deftly folded paper birds on the table, and Kagome wondered why she was so careful in the making. Over, over, folding into eternity…the woman's fingers deftly touched the creases, an impossible bending of space, the art of folding paper, origami._

_Kagome turned over in her sleep, within her mind, fingers moving in tandem. Right, left…over, in and out. What did it mean? She watched the woman, who watched the bird, and the paper watched her. She felt the sensation following her; a circle of eyes._

_The woman watched calmly from a window that had not been there before, and threw her paper creations to the winds. The paper feathers unfolded, became real; crows, birds, white birds that bled black ink, china ink, until they were only motes of dust against the clouds. _

_Kagome laughed, and soundlessly rose with them, riding a bird, somehow as small as an eye, riding on the broad, feathery back. The perfect freedom of drifting within time, within sky, unchained as a dandelion, pervaded every part of her being, a fierce joy in self reliance, self knowledge of what she could do and who she was. _

_The fliers scattered, black specks against the sky. Soon, not a one could be seen against the wavering landscape, viewed though a thick smoke. Smoke and mirrors, dusted with feathers._

_Kagome felt the yawning of distance beneath her, the room fading into the velveteen night. The woman was left behind, her frown of concentration gone with the wind. Kagome rode high on the birds-that-were-not-birds, a single pair of eyes examining the ground from above. Forest, rocks mountains... a map of the world, skimmed along until back at the village._

_Then, down…down…she zoomed in on the house, though the window…_

Kagome woke with a gasp, sitting bold upright. The sudden movement drove the fading dream from her mind, letting its spell vanish into the night. All that was left behind was a confused impression of paper feathers, and a woman throwing birds from the window.

Kagome frowned. There was something wrong, a premonition…something she couldn't quite put her finger on…

Shippo poked his head around the door frame "Hey! You're up! Kaede is getting breakfast ready!"

Whatever it had been, vanished.

Kagome put it from her mind, and stood up, joints creaking slightly from yesterday's battle. "Really? Then I guess I shouldn't keep her waiting, should I? I have things to do before she starts with today's training."

Kagome wanted to fix up that necklace, make it so the wearer was truly overlooked and invisible to the senses. _All _of them. She'd questioned Sesshoumaru after the battle about youkai senses, and added her own logic to the problem.

She shooed Shippo out of the house, and frowned, looking over the scrap of paper where she had written the five senses, plus the 'sixth sense' she had as a miko, and the ones youkai had as well. She had even tried to cover 'mental activity', to avoid anything like mind reading, though she doubted any youkai would do that. At the least, it would shield the wearer's mind from attack.

Then, she started listing out where she had gone wrong. Scent, that had to be changed. But, only to block out the scent of the wearer, not the surroundings for miles. Sight, though she thought uneasily of night vision, and made a note to cover everything from radio to gamma rays in her necklace. Maybe that way she could block out heat sensing, and infrared things.

The few modifications were written out in her neat hand on scrap paper, and gone over a few times, then tucked away. She seated herself outside, and relaxed, green and white stone necklaces in her hands. She needed to get a box for all her prayer beads soon. Sesshoumaru had asked her for another illusion yesterday, and she had promised to meet him this afternoon to take care of that.

He was planning on sneaking around eventually, she knew, and if Kagome got her own necklace to work, she could go with him. She knew she could help, and she wanted to do _something_. Even if she _hadn't_ been somewhat friendly with Sesshoumaru, she wouldn't have allowed Damia or the Purists to go though with their plans. She'd seen what was happening this past month. Every day, there was news of the warlords building an army, attacking youkai, and the youkai retaliating. To the north, near the Nikkou Shrine area, they had heard news of a huge human army assembling.

Sesshoumaru had seemed disturbed by the news, and had then disappeared again a week ago. She knew he was planning on going to the South, and she was going to go with him. Something about calling a council, to place Damia in a position where he could get at her. Sango and Miroku had talked with her, with Kaede listening in the background. Sango could not travel much at 8 months pregnant, and Miroku refused to leave her or let her fight, or they both would have come with Kagome. The village still needed protection, after all. Kaede had simply nodded, and said she agreed, but was unable to come along. Kagome was the only one who could go.

Kagome grinned. Kaede had managed to drill quite bit into her head about miko and their powers over the last month. She knew she'd need all of it soon, they both knew it, and Kagome just hoped it would be enough. She hadn't had a chance to learn so much... barriers, training with Sango, healing...

It would have to be enough. They couldn't allow Japan to fall like this. Youkai against youkai, human against human… not now. Kagome knew time would be short before things within history began to move.

She knew that, for Japan to avoid becoming a colony in the years to come, it would need to be strong, and this internal dispute could change all that. Kagome had no idea what would happen if something…changed, in the past, if what she'd learned in her history class would vanish. Would the Tokugawa regime never happen, or…what? What would the modern Japan look like if the past changed?

She didn't know if this had happened, or if it hadn't, if the past was changeable at all, but she had given the matter some thought. She wouldn't risk it. Dealing with time travel and all the headaches of following _that_ train of thought was as bad as quantum physics…

She had no way of telling what had happened to this part of youkai history…as she had previously noted, there was a shocking amount left out of her history texts.

So, Kagome would go with Sesshoumaru to the south. She'd tell him this afternoon, in fact. She was a firm believer of the saying 'the gods help those who help themselves.'

Kagome took a deep breath, and carefully read over her list of things to add to the necklace. This time, everything had to be covered. She thought she had done it this time round…the last attempt had not been planned out properly; she'd simply wanted to see if she could make an 'invisibility necklace', with the rest tacked on as an afterthought. This time, she'd do it properly. She had asked Shippo about any extra senses, asked Kaede and Sesshoumaru, and had given the matter a lot of thought, adding what she knew about night vision and other things modern to the equation. Nothing was left out, she hoped.

Slowly, she calmed the storm of thoughts, worries, the distractions piling up inside her skull and let them all out. Calm, with only the thought of what she wanted in her mind. The white necklace was set on the ground beside her, for later. She held the grass green necklace in her lap, the cool stone of the beads leaking through to her legs, hidden by a slightly grubby pair of white slacks. True to her word, Kagome had brought back some sturdy training clothes, mostly white and green_. 'Nothing red.'_

Slowly, she formed a clear picture of a person wearing the green beads, adding the attributes one by one. Her spell was not a true invisibility…that wouldn't work, because it involved deflecting the light so no one would see you.

Problem being, you needed light to see. If the light couldn't touch you, and no one saw you, you couldn't possibly see anything either. _True_ invisibility left you in the dark, she'd discovered very early. Kagome had solved it by attaching a very strong 'you don't see me, I'm not here' instead, which worked just as well with the amount of power she had backing it.

Scent. Gone. Leave the flowers, leave the grass, but anything of the wearer, vanish. _'You don't smell me. You don't hear me_.' Kagome wove their absence in, and went on to the next, pulling together the threads of the working as she went, creating a whole. Six and a half senses. Touch and taste were much harder, and would only be able to stand up to a little before breaking. Not that taste mattered much, unless a deranged youkai holding out his tongue for snowflakes ran into her. But best make sure. No telling what would happen. Numb the feel of skin, of cloth, and smooth it away as much as possible.

And lastly…the hardest two. Mind, and power. Kagome turned the weave inside out within her mind, first making the spell invisible, proud of how much control over her thoughts she'd managed to achieve.

Youkai would not feel this, and another miko would not know it was there. And, within that, another weave, connected to the first but separate, still working together but independently. _'Hide this person.'_ Power of a youkai, power of a priest, or a miko, senses other than five, hidden.

Invisible.

Nothing remained in her mind, hidden away by that slow weaving, asking the beads to accept her vision, feeding them power, giving more, as much as she could give it.

Kagome knew she probably didn't need to make something that powerful, but she did not want to risk being caught. Better an outsized mallet than a spoon to crush a cockroach. Especially if it became an unexpectedly _large_ one.

It made disguising the power around the necklace more of a challenge – especially preventing any purifying power getting into the mix, in case Sesshoumaru wanted to borrow it and got fried - but she had to make sure. She couldn't allow herself to mess up, only to find out she'd made a mistake when she was miles inside enemy lines with no way out.

At last, Kagome opened her eyes.

The sun had risen much farther, and Kaede stood watching her, Shippo beside her. "Finished, Kagome? That was a mighty work you be a doing."

Kagome smiled, and suddenly realized how tired she was, and that her throat screamed for water. "I have to do this. It can help us a lot." Kagome grinned. "See?"

She stood up on legs that didn't really want to cooperate, and pulled the stones over her head, vanishing.

"Can you hear me?" _Hopefully_ they couldn't…

"Kagome? Where did you go? Kagome?" Shippo blinked, and ran, arms out. One hand hit her knees, but he didn't notice immediately. Kagome smiled. "Shippo?"

He still didn't hear, and she picked him up to let him know she was there, to test how well one could hide a touch. Shippo started laughing. "Kagome! I found you! You feel weird though…like the edges aren't there."

Kagome pulled off the necklace. "Really?"

"Yeah. It was really strange. I knew you were there, but I couldn't tell, exactly. It was like that time my tongue went numb."

Kaede nodded. "I, too. Even my sister did nothing like this…one day, you will be the most powerful miko in this land, I believe. I am honored to have you as a student." Kaede wondered what else this young woman would do. Her sister Kikyo…she had never thought to do things this way. This was something new.

Part of Kagome's power…it lay in her strange upbringing. She had no preconceptions, and thought to do things no one had ever done. No doubt Kikyo could have done exactly the same, might have even been better on technical details…but she had never had the vision.

And the vision counted for more than skill ever did. Skills could be learned, while intuition, ideas…those were not the same. They just _came_.

Now…if Kagome could just manage to grasp how to break barriers, and improve her endurance…

Kagome bowed low, blushing slightly and wavering on her feet. "Kaede, you give me far too much credit!" She grimaced as she noticed the trembling in her fingers. "Oh dear…I think I'm going to fall over..."

"I am not surprised, after what you just did." Kaede smiled. "Breakfast is finished…I think you should have some, and rest a bit before you go to the target I set up. Two hundred rounds, from the far edge of the clearing." _That_ ought to get some endurance into her!

Kagome groaned slightly, slipping the two necklaces into her bag, their jade green and ivory polish melding into the shadows of her carryall. Two hundred rounds, from about a hundred meters…man…

'_Kaede is doing this for my own good. Kaede is doing this for my own good. I'm doing this for my own good. Kaede is doing this for my own good. I'm doing this for my own good. Kaede is doing this for my own good…'_

Somehow, the litany wasn't helping…

1111111111111111

Kagome hunched over the midday meal, arms aching, her muscles pulling over the bones tiredly in protest. It was already half into the afternoon…her watch said about 2.

It had taken her a long time to finish the archery, and when she'd done, Kaede had made her run a few laps before trying, once again, to make her pupil understand barriers. She thought she might just be starting to get it…

She shivered slightly, skin still clammy from sweat, and grimaced, aware of the fact that she hadn't been home for supplies in a week and had run out of a few things this morning. Someone needed to invent better feudal deodorant, or she needed to make some sort of scent-only vanishing charm…

She ate ferociously, ravenous after her morning workout, then paused as she sensed a powerful youkai behind her, in the woods. Sesshoumaru…?

He stepped out from behind the trees, and came into the practice clearing. "Kagome."

She relaxed a bit. "Hi. You're here for that necklace?" She should be good to make a necklace, even if she was tired, still slightly drained from this morning. Illusion wasn't hard, aside from giving it enough power to last, and this one would need a lot to stand up to a powerful youkai's examination. She thought she might just have enough strength left for this. She had hardly used any spiritual power (though her arms were still noodles!) for archery, trying to get her reserves up in time for the afternoon. She didn't want to let her friend down.

"Yes." He had already decided on the mental image to use. He would pretend to be one of his own foot soldiers, one of the mutts from the far off corners of his domain. All inu youkai had similar features, and it would take a very long time for someone to check him against all the records and discover that he wasn't part of the army, even if he was caught. Age the armor up a bit, and the clothing... and then cover the magenta and blue marks, replacing them with those of a fairly weak mixed breed... Sesshoumaru mentally adjusted the facial features, and changed small details like eye color. Higher cheekbones, narrower face, hair more light blond than silver white, no tail... a few good changes would make him look unrecognizable.

He didn't like doing it, but at least it was better than pretending to be human, and he'd endured that, hadn't he? At least this time he was inu youkai still...

Kagome started rummaging around in her carryall. It came with her everywhere. Small enough to carry things she needed, and not as large and unwieldy as the worn yellow knapsack back at Kaede's hut. She soon managed to pull out the white necklace, but paused. Should she show him the other one yet?

No, she decided. It would be a surprise. She was going to tell him of her intention to come South, and he'd object…but if she snuck up on him first, it would prove she could come without him needing to worry.

"This one should work. You said you wanted to pick what the illusion was?"

"Yes." He firmly brought up the mental picture of the mutt inu solider, and held onto it.

"Alright then. Same thing as last time. Just let me finish lunch first, please? I'm starving…"

Sesshoumaru nodded amiably, and sat against a tree, lounging as she finished up the plain but hearty meal. For such a small person, she could certainly pack the food away sometimes.

Finished, Kagome put down the bowl, and picked up the necklace. "Okay, here we go. Make a picture in your mind, and I'll feed it in. You're going to add all the other things too, right? Like youki, scents…?"

"Yes." That was the entire point of having him do this in the first place; he knew how to make it look convincing to the enhanced senses of a youkai, while she did not. He also knew a lot more about what would make a good cover...

It went faster than it had last time she'd made a heavy duty necklace for Sesshoumaru, or this morning. Kagome knew where she stood with illusions. She carefully pieced everything together, and in no time at all it was done.

She grinned, and looked at the ivory beads. "I'll try it on, see what you think." She put the necklace on, and raised an eyebrow. "Well? Think this will work?"

She giggled as her voice changed midway out her mouth, deepening, more baritone.

Sesshoumaru smiled slightly, pleased. He couldn't find anything of Kagome in the person in front of him. The woman in front of him had become exactly as he had pictured the disguise in his mind, with even details like scent and voice tone changed. A set of battered armor, though still serviceable, covered the white uniform of the Western Army, worn by a male inu youkai with a forgettable face, and mixed markings. He couldn't find anything to complain of. "I think that will work. I cannot find any way to get past the illusion, short of taking the necklace off. Perhaps if one was to actually come into contact with it it might not work, but..."

Kagome grinned, and pulled off the ivory beads. "Probably. Really? Well, good then. You should be able to go South without a problem now."

"Yes." He had been putting off starting the journey. There was something else he had to do first, before he left. Something he didn't _want_ to do, but which must be attended to.

Only after that could he move forward.

"When are you leaving?" Kagome looked hard at him, the look in her eyes stating that she wasn't going to let him go anywhere without telling her.

…when would he be leaving? When would he do it? When would he go back…?

"Not tonight. Tomorrow morning, early. I will go to meet Lord Tosa, and Lady Satsuma of the South, and hopefully, something can be done about this. Perhaps, if they call a meeting of the four lands in the city of Aizu, we can prevent war. It may be too late."

"I hope not! I don't want all this to happen. I know what Japan is going to run up against in the next couple hundred years, and infighting now could destroy a _lot_." She'd told Sesshoumaru about her time-traveling-based speculations before, and Sango and Miroku. They agreed with her. This had to stop…and as far as she knew, they were the only ones who had a chance of doing so. Nobody but Sesshoumaru could take on Damia without causing more trouble later on, so nobody would step forwards. They had to help Sesshoumaru do this, because nobody else could. It wasn't always your problem, but it became your responsibility.

Kagome grinned. She had a few more preparations to make, to make sure Sesshoumaru let her come along on this trip. The one time she'd mentioned it, he had been…vocal…in telling her she was not needed, but Kagome didn't think she'd listen. She wouldn't be entirely useless. What if he came up against that dark miko again, or something? She could help him a lot, if he'd only let her…she knew she wasn't Kikyou, but she also knew she wasn't simply a naïve schoolgirl anymore.

Kagome stood up, and dusted off her knees, picking up her bow and placing the small carryall on her back. She never went anywhere unarmed now. "Well, I have to get back to the village. I have things to do. I'll see you soon before you go, ok? Don't go off without saying goodbye."

Sesshoumaru didn't answer as she walked out of sight, towards Kaede's hut. He had far more important things on his mind. He had to go, tonight. If he was leaving tomorrow, he would have to go back there tonight... go back to that clearing...

He shivered slightly, and settled his tail more firmly around his shoulder. He would be calm. He couldn't let it get to him.

Kagome, with all her odd notions, her ideas and theories on time travel…it had led him to think a great deal about what he remembered of his time…in this time…the time beneath the ground.

He remembered it, the moment when he finally came up for air. He knew now, though he hadn't really thought of it then; not that he could have, he'd been too mind-dead to think of anything… He knew he had saved himself.

Kagome…he remembered her there, but that was impossible. It couldn't be true… but if it wasn't, then was the rest partly true? Or was it all some mad fever dream?

He smiled slightly, as he remembered the daydream of the butterfly sleeping on the old man's robe. The butterfly dreamed of resting on a man, while the man dreamed he lay on the grass, with a butterfly perched on his chest. Which one was real?

This was what he perceived as true, whatever the reality. He had to go back, and open that pit before he left. He had been trying to bring himself to go back there for a month. Back to Rin's grave, his own grave. Now that push came to shove, he had to actually do it, not just think about doing it.

He wanted to tell Rin about what had happened, that he was sorry. He had never said goodbye to her properly. Not when he'd gone on that journey, and come back to find her dead in the garden, and not when he'd been attacked, after burying her. He hadn't had time to say it.

So. He would go, and say a proper farewell.

He would let go. If he could.

Sesshoumaru settled his tail about his shoulders, and took a deep breath before rising, and walking slowly away from the cherry tree, resolute.

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Kagome waited till she was nearly at the village before stopping, and taking out the green necklace. She slowly unwound it, and slipped it over her head, turning back the way she had come once it was securely around her neck. Sesshoumaru had seemed a little distracted by something…probably planning his trip tomorrow, and doing last minute preparations. She intended to make sure she would be a part of those preparations.

She slunk back towards the clearing, and stopped as she saw Sesshoumaru get up and walk towards her. Her breath caught in her throat. Had she done something wrong? Had he…?

She sighed inaudibly in relief as he passed her a few meters to the right, eyes never seeming to note she was there.

Worried over nothing. Kagome giggled slightly, the adrenaline rushing though her bloodstream giving her extra energy, making her daring. She decided to follow him.

After all, if she could track him without _Sesshoumaru_ picking up on it, then he couldn't argue that she couldn't do the same to someone else! Therefore, giving her a better position when she said she'd be accompanying him on the trip South.

Kagome grinned, and set off. He wasn't moving so fast she couldn't keep up, and if she suddenly stepped out after a couple of miles and pointed out why she should come…

Kagome followed, trying to be stealthy even though she knew that the necklace should be enough. It never hurt to be cautious…and it was kinda fun to slip along from tree to tree, pretending to be a ninja, or a famous bandit king, like she and Souta had pretended when they were very small, playing hide and seek around the shrine grounds.

He had always been a ninja, or an elven ninja, something picked up after watching the original animated lord of the rings. She preferred to be a bandit queen, or a pirate.

A few paces away, Sesshoumaru stopped, and she tensed, waiting as he glanced up at the sky, before continuing on in the same, slow march, rhythm steady as a drumbeat.

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He remembered this spot. Sesshoumaru glanced up at the sky, sure that if he could just close his eyes hard enough, long enough, he'd open them to Rin coming to a landing with AhUn to his left, where the mushrooms grew on a fallen tree. He could still see the claw marks, from scrabbling paws, and the faint remains of crushed fungi. Some of it was only memory, while some things remained, after a year. Only a year? Hard to believe, but here, it had only been a year, while for him, it had been centuries...

He blinked, slowly, and set off on the slow march again, following the same way he had come when he left to bury her alone.

Here…and here…he remembered these places, what had happened there such a short time ago, a million years ago. He wasn't sure which; it changed from moment to moment.

Jaken singeing the fish, and Rin pouting about it, the flower field on the left, where she had watched the fireflies…

These woods were haunted. He had come here often, with her, despite the fact it was close to Inuyasha's territory, and it was here that she had found that perfect meadow, her favorite, tucked away from the troubles beyond its borders. Serene, an island where the world beyond dared not come, the enchanted meadow beyond the bounds of time. But it was an illusion, one that had been broken when Damia entered the green glade to take his life.

He paused, watching the small purple flower by his foot. He'd almost stepped on it before he realized it was there. He picked it, thinking to place it on Rin's grave. She had liked flowers. It didn't matter if they were common, ditch-side weeds, or the meticulously maintained private garden in the courtyard; she beheaded them all, and loved the petals the same.

His feet followed the path before them unerringly, knowing the way without conscious thought on his part. He had sunk into the endless tumble of thoughts, memories of Rin, of peace, of days without a care in the world but the eventual demise of Naraku. He could see it, now. His distraction with finding and killing the jewel-obsessed hanyou had been the opening Damia had been planning for, been waiting for. Oh, for paradise lost….

Behind him, another pair of feet followed, unknown. Kagome cursed inaudibly as she tripped, and hurried to catch up, still too far back to see the normally stoic mask Sesshoumaru wore slowly grow transparent, the rarest of moments.

She noticed him take the flower, and wondered at it, but didn't give it too much thought. She was content to follow along behind, and wait for her opportunity to jump out and surprise him.

Ahead of her, Sesshoumaru stopped at the edge of a clearing, stopped for a long time before continuing. Kagome frowned. Had he sensed something…?

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Here. He was here…this was it. This was where he and Rin had so often come, where she'd discovered the joys of fireflies, picked pale flowers that bloomed with the moon. Here was where she had been happiest.

And here was where she stayed eternally, amongst the things she'd loved. He had never realized how terrible a thing it was to lose a child. A parent, an older relative… those left behind knew they had had a chance at life, had lived and made an impression that would last. He'd never been terribly attached to his family anyway.

But now… A child… Rin was the ultimate loss. What of the coming of age? The first really beautiful kimono he had planned to give her, a first love and awkward kisses…

That was gone. Rin was gone. She would never do any of those things now.

He stared blankly out over the meadow for some time, before continuing on in a near trance. He left the trees behind him, and slowly walked over the freshly green grass, dotted with flowers.

He had to say goodbye… as if saying it would finally bring some sense of closure. He was free in body, now, not trapped within his mind, within the spell, trapped with endless introspections on her, and his own circumstances.

With this thought held foremost, Sesshoumaru walked forwards, to stand before the foot of a small, simple stone, elegant kanji covering its stone face, etched by acid.

"Rin…" it was a whisper, scarcely louder than a breath of air. "I…I came to say…" The stone watched, saying nothing in reply. Was Rin's spirit watching him? For one moment, Sesshoumaru allowed his mask to slide off completely, exposing the raw face beneath, the face far below the surface that held his emotions pinned behind high walls of expectations.

"I came to say goodbye, Rin." The mask had returned, but if Rin had been watching, she would have smiled. Errant, wandering breezes played with Sesshoumaru's long hair, playfully stealing the loosely held purple flower, letting it spiral down to the sunken mound of earth. Sesshoumaru knew she'd have understood. He was a youkai of few enough words, and she had always simply... understood.

Was that her, watching him? Perhaps, perhaps not. He imagined he could feel her there, smiling with the wind. She was gone. Sesshoumaru closed his eyes, letting the film-screen of memory play against the thin skin of eyelids. He stood like that for a long time, seeing everything, before he stopped, seeing the grave behind his eyes, and opened his eyes, clear gold surveying the peaceful clearing sadly. Rin. So much in a simple name, only two characters of katakana... so much, so much he would never see again, so much he'd have to...bid goodbye to...

"Farewell." One word.

And with that, he turned and left, blinking, eyes watery but not letting himself go completely. Even for Rin, he could not cry... Yet...Somehow, he knew, the healing could begin, after he finished what he had come here for. He hoped, hoped it would be enough...

Against the far side of the clearing was a larger mound of earth, a stone atop proclaiming that here lay the most egotistical bastard the world had ever known. No name was mentioned. His own, slightly less thoughtful, memorial. Sesshoumaru thought he could have done without it.

He caught himself fastening on something else to think about, avoiding any thoughts on what lay beneath. That would not do. He had to do this, had to find some way to deal with it. What didn't kill one made one stronger. Fear hadn't killed him, would not kill him. He would not hesitate, wouldn't hesitate, wouldn't hesitate, wouldn't hesitate…

Slowly, Sesshoumaru took a step forwards.

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Kagome watched, puzzled at first as Sesshoumaru paused at odd places before finally entering the clearing, and then watched, still puzzled, as he began wandering inexorably towards the far end of the meadow. What was distracting him?

She glanced curiously at the mound of earth apparent on the far side of the clearing, shadows cast by the overturned earth growing longer in the late afternoon sun. Soon, the sun would near the horizon, and dusk would set in. She had to surprise Sesshoumaru soon, didn't she? She shook her head to clear it, and followed after him, stopping short as she finally realized what Sesshoumaru was headed for.

It was a grave…a small, carefully made grave, stone words large enough that she could read them, if she squinted hard enough at the characters.

Rin.

Kagome gasped, eyes going wide as she realized what was happening. Rin…this must…Sesshoumaru must have buried her here himself…

She glanced at Sesshoumaru, and for the barest flicker of a second, caught the look that passed across his face. It terrified her to see the buried emotions come so close to the surface, to see the grief that was written in his features so openly, so deeply, if only for a moment.

Somehow, it made him more keenly human, more a rounded person, than he had ever been. She had intruded on something very real, something private, though Sesshoumaru didn't know it. She should not have come, ought not have disturbed this…

Kagome slowly backed away, tripping over a hillock, and falling on a hillock, trying to stifle any noise she made, forgetting about the new necklace in her hurry to be away. Even if she had remembered, she wasn't sure of how much it would hide. But she could not resist going to the other side of the meadow, to the larger hill of earth, circling round to see, moving into the space made by an unassailable wall of rock and a thick corpse of pine. Was this the dragon that had been with Sesshoumaru…? There was some morbid, irresistible compulsion to see the name written on the stone before she left, as though it drew her eyes inexorably, and the rest of her was geas-bound to follow.

There was nothing; no name, no prayers for the dead, only a curse, a scar cut into the stone as though it were feudal graffiti, and, like the effigy of Ozymandias, 'Here lies the most egotistical bastard the world has ever known.'

She frowned, unable to imagine what must be lying here to be remembered like that. What could possibly have been…? Why…? Was there no respect for the dead? Surely Sesshoumaru hadn't also made _this _grave, created such a crude resting place. He had never stuck her as the sort of person to deface an enemy's grave. Kill directly, and afterwards leave it be seemed to be more his style.

Kagome shook her head slightly, and jumped as something moved behind her, heart racing at the sudden invocation of fight or flight.

Sesshoumaru had sneaked up on her. She relaxed at first, then stiffened at she noticed that he was now between her and the way out. She backed away slowly, feeling guilty as hell. The forest behind her was a wall of pine, the thick growth making it impassable without betraying her presence. She'd need a machete to pass, surely! And the only way out of the corner was past Sesshoumaru, who would notice if she was that close, surely. And she didn't want him to know she'd followed him, not now. Suddenly, the morning's plan seemed the worst folly in the world. Oh yes, follow Sesshoumaru around like some lovesick fan-girl…

Unseen, Kagome swallowed, hard. It looked like she had unwittingly, unwillingly, scored front row seats to something she should not have intruded on in the first place…

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Step. Another step. Another, another. He couldn't stop now, or, shameful as it was to admit, he might not start forwards again. He would be locked in place, a prisoner of his own shortcomings.

Slowly, inexorably, Sesshoumaru continued towards the resting place of the statue, a confusion of emotions intruding with every step. He didn't want to do this, but it had to be done. Somehow, thinking of... it... as the statue made it easier. He had to show himself, prove to himself that he was stronger than his fear, that he was equal to the task. Even if no one else ever knew, _he_ would. He had to do it, had to face it down like the proud Taiyoukai he was, or acknowledge that he'd failed.

Sesshoumaru scanned the marker stone as he approached, lips twisting at the spite Damia had shown in leaving it behind, marked with slander. Petty, and uncalled for. She had always been petty. But it didn't matter what was written over his grave. What mattered was what he would do about it.

Without pausing, Sesshoumaru struck out at the stone, and slashed cleanly through it with a flick of a glowing whip.

Not stopping, he continued downwards, blasting dirt away, hating the destruction of calm within the meadow, fearing to halt, fearing even to pause, lest it be the fatal tip; the thin edge of the wedge.

He had to keep going.

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_Woooo! Drama and angst aplenty. And yes, I **did** have to cut it off there – the scene got to be in excess of 25 pages, so it's in two chapters. That had nothing to do with me being evil. (honestly!)_

_And, because I'm so nice… Next part is up next Wednesday, a day early. Lol. If the reviews are particularly eloquent, even earlier. (Hopefully I can keep that promise – this is the week from hell, for me. Final portfolios due Wednesday at 5:00. Period. Still got 7 paintings and a few collages, and that **huge **drawing to do...Ehhhehe..)_

_Thank you for all the lovely reviews last chapter! I appreciate them greatly!_


	23. ch22:Lean on Me

**Please read the note at the bottom of the page... **

**:: Lean On Me ::**

(last chapter)

Sesshoumaru scanned the marker stone as he approached, lips twisting at the spite Damia had shown in leaving it behind, marked with slander. Petty, and uncalled for. She had always been petty. But it didn't matter what was written over his grave. What mattered was what he would do about it.

Without pausing, Sesshoumaru struck out at the stone, and slashed cleanly through it with a flick of a glowing whip.

Not stopping, he continued downwards, blasting dirt away, hating the destruction of calm within the meadow, fearing to halt, fearing even to pause, lest it be the fatal tip; the thin edge of the wedge.

He had to keep going.

(and continuing...)

Kagome gasped as the whip of light flashed, nearly crying out in inaudible surprise. She stood, frozen with amazement as Sesshoumaru continued grimly on, sensing the thinly veiled determination, and fear beneath his mask. Whose grave could this possibly be, to deserve this? What did Sesshoumaru care for this unnamed victim of life? And why was it buried near Rin…?

Kagome froze solid as one answer belatedly occurred to her, as she watched stone feet being uncovered.

If Sesshoumaru had been attacked while he was distracted by Rin's death, as he had said… then…might he not have meant _when_ he was burying her? Which would mean…

This wasn't a grave, but a _prison_, a prison for the statue, for a soul, for _Sesshoumaru_.

Kagome tried to jump out of the way, tried to get out of there as fast as she could, but it was impossible. She was torn between tearing her way through the trees and risking discovery, going past Sesshoumaru and certain discovery, or staying put with her hands over her eyes and her head in the sand. Embarrassment and razor keen shame warred with one another.

She risked a glance at Sesshoumaru, and stopped she caught his eyes, saw…a flash of knowing finally came to her, of why he was doing this…

Understanding.

Terrible understanding broke through, and she nearly gasped as the sudden empathy opened her mind to the truth.

She understood at last what had happened to Sesshoumaru, as the pieces finally clicked. He could not know where he was buried, unless he'd _seen_ it happen. Some obscure form of intuition, of subtle hints, the late night muttering she'd heard from Sesshoumaru's room, the hints and glimpses, the knowledge gained from Kaede… they all came together in one blinding, horrifying instant for Kagome.

Sesshoumaru had known where to look for the statue…because the 'statue' had seen what happened, had been awake, alive, and conscious for several centuries, had seen itself buried beneath the ground, out of sight, and out of mind.

Kagome shuddered at the thought, knowing sharply even as she did so that there was no way she could fully grasp the horror of such a prison, not until she had been there herself. She thanked the gods she would never go though that. Being buried alive… being left trapped, awake and immobile, slowly weakening for the gods knew how long…She was amazed he hadn't gone insane, hadn't cracked, had even come _back_ here. She hoped she never had to endure such a thing as that, never… how he could be so strong...

Damia had been pure evil, to do that to anyone, to leave them alone…to bury him alive after having probably laughed in his face about killing Rin…

Kagome felt a rush of sympathy for Sesshoumaru. He was so determined to overcome something that should have crippled nearly anyone else, and all along she never knew… He was just so determined to be strong... just like her. Everyone wanted to be stronger, wanted to be better. Sesshoumaru...

There was no way she could leave him alone. Kagome's heart went out to him. For the first time he became a real person to her, not Sesshoumaru, the terrifying youkai come to kill her, not Sesshoumaru, the lost soul in the museum, not the lord of the West, not even the vaguely friendly denizen of her house he had been a month ago, but simply Sesshoumaru. She hadn't really known him truly until now. He had always been just a little out of reach, untouched, detached. Kagome had been afraid of him, once, long ago, though never terrified. Now... she could find nothing in her heart but compassion.

She stared and wondered, amazed at the sudden depth he had acquired in her eyes, how far down the emotions were buried. She knew now that Sesshoumaru wasn't nearly as cold and distanced as he'd made out. He simply didn't make the connections he had obvious. Hadn't she seen the proof with her own eyes, not so long ago, when his eyes had followed the children laughing at the park? His roots went deep, deep down to where they hardly rippled the surface, so that you never knew they were there…

She didn't move from her place at the edge of the opening pit beneath her feet. Embarrassment and shame no longer mattered. What mattered was that he redeem himself, recover himself. And if there was a chance she could help him…

But no. This was a battle to redeem _himself_, to prove himself, and she couldn't interfere. Not without damaging something, something deep inside, forever. Kagome, much as she wanted to help, knew that this was a private battle, no matter that she was standing not two meters away. She couldn't help without ending the battle for the worst.

But she would still watch, and will him on to victory from the side. And when he stopped, she would be there, if he let her. Everyone needed a shoulder to lean on. She wasn't much, but she would be there for him.

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Sesshoumaru paused, face twisted slightly as he unearthed a pair of feet, stone shoes covered with dirt. As though it wasn't enough to bury him like a bitch's dead bone, she'd had to plant him wrong way up. A shock of recondition traveled though his fingers, and he closed his eyes, before carrying on determinedly. He knew that if he stopped now, there was no hope for him. He wouldn't be able to control his lands, wouldn't be able to save the youkai of Japan, if he couldn't save himself.

The first victory, perhaps the only _true_ victory, was the one over one's self. He knew this, had had it pounded into his mind since he could walk, how self-discipline and courage were the raw tools to face the world with. Never had it seemed more true than now. Sesshoumaru kept going, almost unable to stop. He felt driven, excavating the past, searching himself as he did so.

If he survived this, he felt there was nothing Damia could do to him that he couldn't weather out. If he could do this…

He had reached the belt, the sword forever beyond the reach of grasping stone fingers, caked with clay and loam. If he had just been a little faster, had drawn his sword… but what was done was done. Damia had planned well for his defeat. Take out Rin, to get at him, while he was distracted with Naraku.

Sesshoumaru closed his eyes, finally accepting that she – Rin - was gone. A little of the burden weighing on his heart faded, though not all of it. He had carried the guilt of her death with him for so many years it had grown to be a part of him, a tumor that had found itself a niche to grow in. He'd almost feel lost without the familiar weight dragging at his heart.

Shoulders. Sesshoumaru carefully brushed away the dirt, leaving a raggedly dirty stone tail bare, set amid the crumbling walls of the hole he'd gradually sunk into. Absently, he flicked some of the overturned dirt off his own tail. Only, the other was his tail too, wasn't it? Sesshoumaru closed his eyes, wincing. It hurt to think on the paradox of time travel and simultaneous existence too much. For now, the statue was 'other', not himself. Distance was _good._ It gave him just enough disassociation to continue.

Finally, the head. Sesshoumaru reached down and heaved, tore the statue from the ground, head swirling with a kaleidoscope of memories, confused impressions and darkness, patterns without light.

It was finished. He was finished. Sesshoumaru stared himself in the eyes, without flinching, held a metaphorical mirror up, and found he could look himself in the face. He had done it.

He felt... strange. Exhausted, that was expected, but there was a feeling of relief, of hope, fear, conquered for the moment, eternal sadness, the exhilaration of freedom...

Triumph He had done it. That was all that mattered. Sesshoumaru stared with the dull eyes of exhaustion, feeling his head spin, only able to comprehend one thing out of the swirl of emotions that plagued him. He'd done it, it was over, he'd finished it...

It was over.

Sesshoumaru wavered in place briefly, dead on his feet. The confusion of his thoughts was simply fading into one numb swirl, far too many thoughts and impressions to feel them separately, only as a jumble. He was just a collection of burnt out responses, with one thought left...

For a long time, he simply stared, watching, not thinking as the wind changed. Then, slowly, he moved.

Sesshoumaru gently righted the statue, and dragged it after himself, crawling laboriously form the hole, slipping on the loose soil, slipping into the familiar, sustaining curses of Inuyasha, for leaving him without an arm, without the balance to climb with, running on automatic. He unwound his tail to help, and, not paying attention to the dirt, came up the sides of the hole, grimly continuing, as though rising from the depths of hell.

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Kagome watched as though in a trance, watching as dirt flew from the hole in the ground in sprays of black. Feathers, it looked like. An explosion of feathers…

There was no question of being able to move away from the hole in the ground. It had grown so wide she would have had to travel around the edges, and perhaps risk falling in, though the other end of the meadow was untouched. Kagome continued to watch Sesshoumaru as he worked at blasting dirt out from the hole, noting the twisted face, the determined eyes.

She had never seen him so animated before, not once. The mask was hardly there, now, transparent. Perhaps he was not smiling, not happy, but…alive. Alive in a way he usually wasn't. The struggle to prove himself had risen to the fore, in a battle quite different from the ones he usually engaged in, and to win, he had brought emotions to just beneath the surface, and stirred the depths, plumbing for the will to succeed.

She watched as the statue was slowly uncovered, layer by layer, and felt, watching, as though she was slowly seeing Sesshoumaru uncovered, peeling away the masks, the walls, the iron of self-discipline, the icy demeanor of a lord, the ingrained distance in a new light. Again, her heart went out to him. He was so lonely, though he refused to acknowledge it, refused to admit that he was anything less than strong. Just like…Inuyasha. She wondered if even he knew how lonesome he must surely be, unless she was completely wrong about everything…

Kagome closed her eyes and smiled, sadly. It seemed so childish in the end, so very _human_, to push others away, to protect yourself like that, to argue for a solitary existence for so long that you began to believe it truly _was_ what you wanted…

Perhaps she was wrong, perhaps youkai were not at all like human beings, but something quite different, something altogether unknowable. Perhaps it was only her mind playing the personification game on her, attaching human emotions to something_ not_ human. Perhaps she was wrong to compare them, the youkai…_him_… to a known quantity like humanity, naively thinking they could be similar in any way.

But…Kagome didn't think so. After spending so long with Inuyasha, and Shippo, she knew that youkai were people too…that they were just as 'human' at heart, in all the ways that mattered.

Blue skin, feathers, claws, death threats… on the outside. Youkai were not so different from humans as they liked to think. They had their own honor, and were capable of the same emotions, of the same wish for a comrade, protection of family, of a friend. Of love.

Kagome shook her head, and almost had to laugh at her sentimental breakdown of what might possibly be going though Sesshoumaru's head. She was being silly, wasn't she? But if he needed someone, needed a shoulder to lean on, she would be there. It was what friends did. And Kagome firmly believed that Sesshoumaru was her friend. Oh, a prickly one, and too stubborn to admit it, but a friend nevertheless. She knew that he cared about her as well, deep down, even if he had never said so. Something told her that was the truth behind it all.

Kagome watched as the sun sank into red, as the dirt flew in black clouds, and the statue slowly surfaced from the ground, until, at last, it was free, and Sesshoumaru, tired, but triumphant, carried himself proudly from the field of battle, all along watching with her heart in her mouth, and her hope shining from unseen eyes.

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Sesshoumaru stood tall, balancing perfectly on the edge of the precipice he'd created, and set the statue down beside him, before slumping, exhausted, to the ground. He sat, and leaned against the statue, watching as the last rays of the setting sun's red light bled though his hair, setting it afire, bouncing the light from strand to stand as he bowed his head, exhausted but victorious, not caring that he sat in the dirt.

He'd done it.

He had proved it. He wasn't bound by fear, but could, in the end, overcome it. He was free, in a way he hadn't been for a long time. Sesshoumaru realized, somewhat surprisingly, that in this one moment, he was actually _happy_. Alive…

Sesshoumaru smiled, an enormous smile that flashed briefly across his face before it submerged itself behind his stoic features. But it lingered in his eyes, in the small quirk of a lip, the jaunty angle of a tail.

He hadn't felt this free, this alive, for so _long_… Free, really _free_, at last. An enormous worry had faded from his mind, and a weight had been removed from his heart.

He was not, by any means, totally without guilt, or pain. Some things could not be undone, nor did he wish they would fade. He did not want to forget Rin, for then her loss would have no meaning, and his life would return to washed out grey.

But he had managed to make a start. He had proved he could do it.

Sesshoumaru smiled briefly, again, and sighed, letting everything fade out with his exhalation, letting his bones melt into the ground, let himself relax, just once, completely, let himself fade until the first stars came, and with them, the path to Morpheus's domain, the shores of sleep.

Sesshoumaru knew that, for once, he would not dream of long ago earthquakes, or the shattering wrench of earth, trapped by a stray butterfly's wing, the soft echo of events that had led him here. Completely spent in mind, he dropped into slumber, half propped up by the silent, stone watcher.

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Across the gaping pit, Kagome grinned, and privately cheered Sesshoumaru on from the side, watching as he sat back against the statue, surrounded by an aura of content, and an inability to bow to defeat.

Which was completely true. It wasn't everyday that you faced down your fears, your ghosts and private agonies as he had just done, and came off the better for it. Kagome silently applauded. She wished she had that kind of inner strength, the same determination… it seemed impossible to live up to all the people around her, at times.

Inuyasha, and Kikyou… she envied Kikyou's ability to do what needed to be done, and the quiet strength that had allowed her to carry on, despite life, death, and everything between. She couldn't ever like her, but she could admire her. Inuyasha had been strong, despite the rough appearance. She wanted to be strong, as well.

Kagome smiled, recalling her friends, Sango, Miroku, and their own triumphs. Shippo, Kaede…even her own mother, who had drawn the lot of silent watcher, the one forced to wait at home for her daughter to come back. She had begun to know that the waiting was just as hard, if not harder, than the doing. Her mother was very strong for being able to let go, she knew that now, more mature at 19 than she had ever been at 15. Kagome hoped that, one day, she could become a woman just as strong.

But enough of that. Kagome glanced around, suddenly realizing the sun had set, and that the clouds, which had made for a brilliant scarlet sunset, were starting to roll in. She would be missed in the village, for sure, and Kaede would be worried. She needed to get a good nights rest if she planned on getting up early to head south tomorrow, and she hadn't quite finished packing… She had to get back, soon. Reality was intruding all to abruptly.

Kagome crossed her arms, and cursed, as she realized that there was _still_ only one exit point from her boxed in corner – right past Sesshoumaru's nose.

Ominously, a low rumble came to her ears, signaling the imminent downpour. "Damn…" Kagome peered around, weighing her options, businesslike. She could change tracks in an instant, quicksilver in the moonlight suddenly become practical. How to get out…? She couldn't stay out here all night, especially not if it was going to start pouring. Those clouds looked a bit too dark for her taste.

There was still a large wall of sheer rock behind her, the edge of the foothills marked by boulders. She hadn't wanted to climb them in daylight for fear of falling, let alone now that the sun was down. Next to them, the thick tangle of fir and bushes still prevented an escape without serious risk of death by pine needles, and certain discovery. There was no way though that mess without waking half the forest for kilometers.

Kagome sighed. Logically, she should be able to slide down into the dirt pile, and then climb back out. It didn't look that hard to do… it couldn't be more than 4 meters deep, at most. Easy…right? Except that she would have to pass fairly close to Sesshoumaru.

She peered at the aforementioned youkai, who was still sitting against the statue, His eyes were closed, and soft, even breathing denoted that he was fairly relaxed. But she knew that if he was sleeping out in the open, sleeping anywhere, he would keep one ear open for sounds of possible danger. If she attracted his attention, she might end up being on the wrong side of his sword, still tucked into the sash at his waist. Not that that would happen – she was going to be very, very careful.

She knew she'd been lucky before when she was following him that he had been distracted, but now, that probably wouldn't hold true. Could her miko spells hold up in the face of his close scrutiny? She didn't know...

Cautiously, she took a step forward, picking her way through the clumps of disturbed soil, careful of the thistles looming on her right. She navigated around a patch of treacherous looking gravel, and found herself at the edge of the pit. The sides were loose, and crumbly. She turned around, and lowered herself in, dropping downwards, catching her balance as the soil threatened to move out from under her.

With a soft curse, Kagome crouched low to the ground, so that there was less chance of overbalancing, getting her clothes dirty in the process. She held her bow in one hand, trying to keep it free from the muck. It was making this whole thing awkward…Oh well. She had a change of clothes waiting for her back at the village. She might need them anyway if the rain stared before she got back…

As though that was a signal, the rain clouds rumbled again, and started to release thick, fat drops. They fell around Kagome, spattering around the moist soil, sinking right in. She winced, and carefully crossed the bottom of the pit, feeling her way with her free hand and feet. She knew she probably looked the worse for wear by now, but it was better this way than running blindly and catching her foot in something. At the bottom of the trench, she couldn't see anything, not even the shadows signaling a sudden dip or mound of dirt. She stretched out her hand, and felt her way forwards blindly, groping her way onwards.

Rain soaked her hands, lightly chilling them as she finally reached the other side, and began to claw her way up the slope. The moist soil from below the ground was still cool, and wet, growing soggier by the minute. Kagome could tell that within a half hour, the pit she was half way out of would be a mud hole. Once she'd reached the far side, she organized the bow, and adjusted the knife Sango had given in her boot, wishing it dug into her shins less.

Laboriously, she clawed her way up the side, wondering how the hell Sesshoumaru had managed to blast such a vertical hole, and yet _still_ climb out carrying a statue, with only one arm! If she hadn't known better, she'd have said he was channeling Superman…

Much soundless cursing and scrabbling later, Kagome was somewhat the worse for wear, her hands and legs streaked with mud, slightly chilled from the rain, but had managed to reach the crest. Finally, having reached the top, she crouched and weighted her chances of escape. Sesshoumaru lay not two paces away, still…asleep? Kagome peered closer, and blinked. He really did look asleep! He hadn't moved to brush the rain from his hair, and was sitting in the mud with not a care in the world. Kagome nearly giggled, thinking back to the affronted look she'd received when he'd been left outside with two boys, both wielding water guns, as though the notion of being wet was a personal insult.

If he could see himself now…! Kagome wiped the smile from her face, and peered a bit closer, carefully moving away from the mudslide. If he didn't move, the rain might just wash him into the pit again. It had already collected a thin layer of water at the bottom, and even as she watched, soil crumbled like a sandcastle on the edge, trickling down in a dirty slide of gravel. A little longer, and he'd fall in too.

How to get him to move away from the edge, without giving herself away…? Kagome pondered for a moment. She knew he would not take kindly to the fact she'd been here the whole time.

The statue made up her mind for her.

It started, ever so slowly, to lean, lean into the hole… Kagome watched in horrified fascination as it gracefully bent backwards, falling in slow motion. Without thinking, on instincts and rain fueled thoughts alone, she dashed forwards to save it, and the person leaning against the statue, from a muddy hole.

"Sesshoumaru! Wake up!"

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He was dozing, hovering just outside the bounds of reality, still within the realm of sleep. Vaguely, he wondered why the ground was flowing away from under him…

He blinked as something unseen splashed by him, splattering his robes with mud. He jumped to his feet, and glanced around, trying to see what had bowled him over on the way to the statue. There was no one there, but that meant nothing. He narrowed his eyes, and let golden light pour into his hand, trying to discover where the intruder was. Mud was everywhere, but there didn't seem to be a person about. There was no smell, no visual…there was nothing. Instantly he came awake, wrapped in the mask again, looking for the danger. But…

Sesshoumaru watched as the mud as though in a heat wave, at the point where the statue was being propped up, just barely avoiding a fall. He lifted his hand higher, letting the yellow hued threat become more visible. Something was there. He knew it, though only that slight shimmer supported the theory. He hadn't lived this long without learning to trust his gut.

"Show yourself!"

He couldn't imagine who it would be… not an enemy, or they would have finished him off before going to the statue. Not a friend, because no one fit that category. His companions back at the village, no… he blinked, as a few remembered, disembodied words floated though his head. _"Is this…are you sure?"_

No, not _her_, surely not…

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Kagome's eyes widened as she heard Sesshoumaru's threat. Great, all that trouble to avoid him, and she jumped right in without a care in the world… stupidstupidstupidstupid…

"Sesshoumaru…? Oh, the necklace…" Awkwardly, she reached for it, trying to support the statue and somehow fumble it from around her neck at the same time. Man, that statue was heavy…! What had Sesshoumaru been eating before he got stuck in the spell?!

Kagome cursed, her voice and figure suddenly becoming visible, vulnerable.

"…-rry about that. Can…can you grab this, please? I can't hold it…" Kagome panted, trying to keep the statue out of the mud hole, feeling incredibly foolish, and utterly unsure of herself. She didn't dare look over at the place where Sesshoumaru stood, golden death in his hand. She knew he wouldn't hurt her, she trusted him, but the anger that he must feel… she didn't want to damage her friendship with him...

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For the longest time, he said nothing, absolutely shocked. He was torn between dry amusement, a sense of the inevitable, and a raging anger, underscored by fear. How much had she seen? How much…? Would she use it against him? Would she?

Such knowledge was valuable, and had already proven his undoing once. His eyes hardened, fear hidden deep beneath the surface. He had conquered the beast once, but that might not mean anything. If she...

He couldn't trust her, he couldn't, not a human miko, not her, too close already, too close was dangerous…distrust warred with a sense of the inevitable, and a deeper feeling of familiarity. Absently, Sesshoumaru took hold of the statue, and dragged it out of the way, to just beneath the trees.

Kagome lurched along behind him, stumbling at the sudden pull, before getting up and following him, head downcast.

How long had she been there? Now that she was not concealed…and, he was willing to admit, if she had tracked him from the beginning, then it was a powerful charm she wore indeed…but now that it was off, he could smell the faint trace of salt, the feeling of guilt.

Now, was that guilt for following him sooner, or later…?

"What were you doing here? Tell me now." Sesshoumaru sat down imperiously beneath the tree, out of the rain, without looking once at the statue. His eyes were fixed on Kagome's face, and his voice whispered of the north, of the ice of midwinter storms. Golden irises were flat, mistrustful, piercing. He would have an answer, and he would have it _now_.

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Kagome watched the youkai sitting under the tree carefully. He was on the edge now, and didn't quite trust her. She could feel it. One wrong word, and he'd tip over the edge. She didn't know how she knew some of this, but she did. Kagome sat down facing him, just out of reach of the rain.

"I…" Kagome closed her eyes. The truth. He deserved the truth. If she paid for it, it had been her choice. Her choice, her bill. "I…followed you from the village because of the necklace. I thought that…I thought that if I could track you unseen, then you might let me go South tomorrow with less arguing."

Mutely, Kagome held out the beads she'd had on. "See?" She opened her eyes, and caught his own flinty gaze. Nothing but the truth. Sesshoumaru stared back at her, eyes narrowed.

He searched her face, her eyes, for any trace of pity. He couldn't abide pity, not now, _especially_ not now. Pity, the veiled, calculating looks, the eyes of a politician, trying to turn his carefully hidden pain and unbalance into a weapon, to be used without mercy…

So that was why she'd come. It made sense. Innocent enough, on its own. "You saw, then?" Careful. Careful. Sesshoumaru used every last iota of control he had left, keeping his voice at a level that transcended deadpan. He still wasn't sure what to do about her. Laugh at her audacity, her concern, or threaten to rip her limb from limb? Not that he would actually do _that,_ but… Her eyes would tell him. Gold flickered towards Kagome's eyes, catching them, holding them for long moments.

She had nothing of pity, no ulterior cast to her face. Sesshoumaru searched for an eternity, as though by looking enough, long enough, he could see inside her soul. Gradually it dawned on him. There was no pity there. Only an understanding, a warmth, and…admiration? He nearly shook his head, confused. Slowly, the anger lost its diamond sharp edge, though it didn't retreat.

"Yes. I… saw everything. I didn't know when I started following you where you were going. If I _had _known…" Kagome broke off. If she had known, what would she have done? She didn't know anymore. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to do this." Kagome grimaced. It was all wrong, it sounded awkward, _felt_ awkward...

Sesshoumaru leaned back slightly, frowning. She hadn't known. He knew she wouldn't use this against him, somehow. And there was still no trace of that terrible pity, or contempt. No ulterior motives. There was only an outreaching glow of understanding, and a desire to be of help…but only if he wanted it. And that was what confused him the most.

She hadn't interfered the entire time she had watched, knowing this was personal. He knew that. She knew it. Slowly, Sesshoumaru considered the thought. She had come so very close to him, and yet... had respected the distance. In the furthest part of his mind, Sesshoumaru considered letting her into his defenses. She'd already come though most of them without even appearing to notice. There was something... disarming, about her. And yet... could he...?

Kagome moved slightly, frowning, whispering. "How did she do it? It wasn't a seal, was it?"

Sesshoumaru started slightly. How had she known that? He was still shocked, still trying to decide what to do about this, though as he waited, the anger was going out even further. He found it difficult to stay angry in the face of her concern. Kagome was past the danger point, where he might have considered hurting, killing, her, though his own private promises…wouldn't allow him to harm her. He had promised himself before, when she had taken him in. She had his protection. He trusted her, for some odd reason. He shouldn't; she was a miko, a potential threat, a dangerous person who was too close for comfort, but there you were. The world turned, and one had to flow with it. He had seen the evidence before that had led him to trust her, and he couldn't give that up now.

Gradually, it dawned on him that she trusted him as well, and that…_she_ wanted to protect _him_. The idea seemed ludicrous, at first. Her, protect him? Indeed…

"No, it wasn't a seal. A killing curse gone wrong, I think." Sesshoumaru answered her earlier question at last, quietly. Why was he even telling her this…? He silently shook his head, amazed. He could trust her. Kagome was... a friend. Yes. A friend. Sesshoumaru hadn't ever really had something like that before in his life, and the feeling of having her as a... friend... was strange, yet terribly enticing, irresistible. Sesshoumaru checked the impulse to reach out and ouch her face, to see if this was really a dream…

Kagome nodded, eyes completely unguarded murmuring softly. "So I was right. I…didn't know that, until tonight." Kagome glanced at the statue, a desire to help, and a knowledge that she was not wanted, could not, would not approach without permission written in her face. She always left herself so unguarded, Sesshoumaru thought. So very unlike him...

"If you…well…I know I'm not much, but I'll be there, if you want me. If not…I'll go." He had come this far, and she'd admired him for it. If he wanted no help, then she would leave him be, since anything she did then might make it worse.

Kagome wanted very much to just reach over and give him a big, comforting bear hug. Her mom always held her when she was feeling down, and Kagome couldn't bear seeing anyone she knew hurting. But she stopped herself, not sure of what might happen if she reached across the distance so definitely.

It was said with complete honesty, and somehow, that made it feel more real to him. Sesshoumaru tentatively blinked, still astounded. Kagome couldn't hide anything of her intent to save her life, he knew that. The truth shone from everything she said.

She would leave it alone, leave him alone, if he asked it of her. She did not pity him for weakness, and didn't see him as a failure for what had happened here tonight. She knew, and accepted, the unreasonable fear the former Taiyoukai had, and didn't make judgments on it. There was no pity, no scorn, no plotting in the back of her mind. Only understanding, and the desire to help, coupled with the admiration that had seemed so misplaced. Admire him? For what…?

She had somehow managed to get under his skin, see right through him in a way he hadn't thought possible, and when she had looked through him, hadn't skittered away from the view. Him. Not the former lord, not the icy masks, none of the faces by the door, but him.

Sesshoumaru.

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Kagome sat still, as the minutes drew out. He hadn't said anything. There was a lot to think about. Did he not want her help? Would he push her away, when she could see clearly that he needed help?

But no. If he said to leave, she would. Helping him then would cause more hurt than nothing at all. She tried not to fidget, as the rain slowly stopped, leaving them in the midst of clouds, broken by the stars. Kagome glanced up, the faint scraps of light visible, a sliver of moon.

Was he too stubborn to see she only wanted to help…?

"Yes." It was a whisper, so slight she could hardly hear it.

"Is this…are you sure?" Sesshoumaru flinched at her words, the ones he'd heard in a dream, dry humor coloring his mind. His memories hadn't lied after all. Just not in the way he'd thought…

"Yes." Stronger, more definite. Sesshoumaru took a deep breath, and let it out, low voice just audible over the lightly falling rain. "I don't know why, but I trust you."

Kagome put out her hand, and lightly touched his wrist, fingers rain cool against his skin. "Then I will try my hardest to be able to live up to that trust." A pause. Kagome smiled softly. He had given her a chance, and she wouldn't waste it. Happiness, for him, spread though her. "Thank you, Sesshoumaru. You're…I wish I was half that strong a person, you know?" She grinned slightly ruefully. She wasn't sure that she could have let anyone live, if they'd seen some of _her_ worst soul searching moments. Thank goodness he hadn't been angry, and pushed her away.

Sesshoumaru blinked, momentarily confused. What was she talking about? Him, a strong person? He'd barely managed to finish what he'd set out to do, and compared to the huge heart Kagome had…well...

Humans. Odd bunch, the lot of them…and miko, it seemed, oddest of all…

He glanced down at the fingers lightly resting on his wrist, watched as they were withdrawn to finger the statue. "What do we do with …him?"

He hadn't really thought that far ahead, actually. Gratefully, Sesshoumaru snatched at the problem, back to business, glad to have something else t talk about. Too much of this was hard to talk about for him. He felt vaguely uncomfortable in this position, under a tree, with this…strange, but somehow, irreplaceable, girl…

"We can't take him to the village." It was easier to talk about the 'other self' as another person. "I remember. I remember after. This statue was left by the crossroads not too far from here. Eventually, I…it was moved."

He sighed, unable to see his way out of the dilemma. He couldn't do more, much as he wanted to. He wanted nothing more than to free himself... his past self, but knew it to be impossible. He had never hoped for it, and the wild, helpless feeling returned breifly, before he pushed it away firmly.

This was as much as he could do, unfortunately…be free of the dark and let time have its way. But at least, he now knew, time led back to the beginning, as it always did, and to here, to this moment. It would take him a long time, but there was a light at the end now; hope.

"Are you sure?" Kagome frowned. He was giving himself to the prison of the spell! She hardly dared think of what might happen if she tried to break the scroll now, but…Kagome brushed at the soil covering the furry stone tail, fingers trembling. "Do you…want me to break the seal?" If it helped him, she would do it, though kami-sama alone knew what quantum outcome the action might have…

"No." Sesshoumaru shook his head slowly, sorely tempted. That she would do this for him…but no. Firmer. "No. I remember, and it must happen. It must. This…is as much as I can do." Sesshoumaru rose to his feet, Kagome coming to stand beside him as they both looked at the statue, thoughts their own.

He searched the statues face, faint impressions of unease, sorrow, helplessness to change fate, rippling though his skin.

Kagome closed her eyes, resolute. "Then…to the crossroads."

"Yes." Terrible, terrible yes…he closed his eyes briefly, then opened them again. He would survive. He always did. Inuyasha had once joked about him having cockroach blood, hadn't he…? At the time, Sesshoumaru hadn't been amused, and seemed to remember some sort of retaliation with poison claws, but…Inuyasha was right about the stubbornness.

She watched as Sesshoumaru, seemingly recovered if not actually, took the statue and formed the cloud beneath his feet that would allow him to fly. "Come." Kagome came, and stood beside him, the statue between them for balance.

It seemed to be an eternal, silent flight before they reached the crossroads, and left their precious burden there. Kagome frowned, as rain began to fall again, harder, after its brief reprieve. She hurried under the trees, wordlessly pulling Sesshoumaru behind her. He followed without objection, and stared back the way they had come, still not quite sure…

Kagome worried her lip. Sesshoumaru still seemed upset, lost, unsure that it was the right course, unsure of himself. She couldn't imagine why; she had seen how strong he was tonight, hadn't he? She knew he could do it. Mutely, she put her arms around his shoulder, reaching on tiptoe to do it, in a comforting gesture. "It'll be okay. I promise."

Sesshoumaru stiffened in shock, astounded that she trusted him this far. To come this close without a trace of fear…and to dare intrude upon his person…

He closed his eyes, but did not push her away, exhausted, tired, and emotionally worn from the days events. Perhaps he should…but…he did not. His eyelids flickered in faint amusement. He could not escape, it seemed. The impossible girl was determined to follow him wherever he went, more persistent than a haunting ghost, and far more intrusive…

Yet, strangely enough, he didn't mind, for the moment. Sesshoumaru sighed, and blamed it on his foggy mind. In the morning, he was going to regret this…

Kagome drew away, a little surprised. She smiled slowly, invisible in the night. He hadn't drawn away. Perhaps he was going to be a little less prickly, then?

Or maybe he was more tired than she'd thought…

With that, she grinned. "Man. I'm going to be tired in the morning. I'm going to the Southern lands with you, remember? And I've hardly even packed…!"

"Yes. I suppose you are." Sesshoumaru sounded thoughtful, slightly disbelieving of his own words. "Come on." He nearly groaned at the thought of getting up early tomorrow to head south. They needed to get back, and sleep…

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Above a deserted clearing, black feathery shapes wheeled, staring at the displaced earth, and the very obviously empty muddy hole. They circled again, and again, picking up every detail. Evidence of mud, and strange tracks, the impression of something heavy.

Soundlessly, they dipped low to confirm what was missing. Then, satisfied, the swirling black specks took to the upper air, and winged towards the west, with all haste.

The mistress would want to know about this as soon as possible.

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_There. Wow. Evidence of touch feely emotional roller coasters at last. Lol. Hope you like. _

_Thanks for all the reviews last chapter! Made me feel special, reading them! (big grin) I laughed a bit too, which is good…(stressed at the moment. Laughter is Good. )_

_I sincerely hope these two chapters make sense. I really, really do. The whole point of giving Sesshoumaru his little quirks was to shake him up enough that when he landed, it would be plausible that he'd somehow begun to be attached to Kagome. Once there's some amount of legitimate fondness, trust, and that, then there's a starting point, but to **get** there…? Urg. Writing it, I sometimes wanted to go after Sess for being an icy idiot with the nunchucks. X.x_

_**Another** note (I know, I know – long winded. Lol.)**Important!** This is the last chapter to date that has been both prewritten, and beta checked. I haven't decided yet if I'll post the very few chapters I haven't sent to/received from my wonderful beta, TrisakAminawn(thanks a bunch!), yet. If they do get posted before being beta'd, I'm afraid it won't be on my normal schedule of once a week, and the content might change after a bit. Honestly, I'm going to try to get as much done during Christmas break as I can, since I won't have much time during the next semester, but….(sigh) Sorry! You guys have been awesome!_

_Lol. Now you get to see what update times are usually like, with me, when I don't have prewritten stuff to work from. XD (Dum dum duuuum. Cue ominous music)_

_Oh well. I'm going to try. I've no intention of abandoning the story at this point! Lol. It's just a question of finding time to write, in with all the art…(You could make me happy by going to my website where you can see art stuff posted, or to lumbe dot deviantart dot com! Lol. Woot for shameless plugging. Homepage link in bio page)_

_There. Wow. If you've made it this far through the note, congrats. XD _

_(Can I have reviews now? Lol)_


	24. ch23:Southern Rain

**:: Southern Rain ::**

In the misty mourning, the company of soldiers traveled slowly, watching the road for any sign of bandits. The priest who had accompanied them from the castle rode beside the lord, whispering in his era. There was something on this road, the men said, whispers in the silence of morning seeming larger than life. Something was waiting.

Whispers on the wind rose, and then fell to startled fears as the priest sat up sharply, and motioned to a halt.

"Youkai."

Nothing more was needed. Soldiers fell into line, around their precious leader, and the priest, face pale, stepped forwards, armed with nothing more than a scrap of paper against the faint tingling of danger.

And as the mist cleared, eyes grew wide. Youkai there was indeed, set against the side of the road, frozen in place as though to attack. But after long moments, and no movement, the priest cautiously advanced, and hesitantly, touched his palm to the grit of a sword.

Stone.

This was once a youkai. But no more. Now, it was safe; in his young eyes, the only good youkai was a dead one. The priest called over the lord, and together they examined the fresh dirt clinging to the long robes, and sculpted locks, longer than any mortal mans.

It was a beautiful statue now, the lord thought. Perhaps it was even a sign, to wish him luck on his way to battle to meet such a thoroughly defeated foe of his. And one did not leave signs from the kami themselves by the side of the road.

Besides, his wife wanted something new for the garden, and this might be a suitable guardian for the begonias.

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Mesau held her hands out to her paper dolls, paper crows, smiling slowly as they crowded around her, perched on the table in her room, leaving shed feathers that slowly faded from view behind. So much neater than real birds, and so much more useful…

"What have you found for me today?" She stroked the lead crow, and held him on her finger, letting the information pass from his mind to hers. She smiled, pleased with her creations. So much better at spying than that awful Sorai… the position was much better filled by Mesau. Of course, there were some who disagreed, but that was life. Mesau knew to be watchful of anyone who protested her position too loudly.

She grinned briefly. So much for Sorai. Mesau had been watching her predecessor lately, sure that she still harbored some resentment, but so far, the youkai remained blameless. Sorai couldn't attack her openly, and if she was undermining from the shadows, she did it very quietly indeed.

After all, with someone like Damia to back her, to provide help and power…well. There were no limits to what she could do. Mesau had always liked the shadows, hiding, manipulating. This job suited her well. She'd often pretended to be a ninja or a spy when younger, never dreaming she would one day actually _get_ the job.

And now, to find out what her favorite flock had discovered for her in the service of Japan. Mesau mentally prodded at the information that the crow had given her, and scanned it. Good, good…that human army was a bit worrisome, but nothing too much to worry about. Perhaps they could even be turned to some sort of use. After all, it was much better for them to attack the foreign enemy, right?

She would write a report for Damia later, outlining the situation and suggesting a few things to consider. Damia didn't like it if she made recommendations, but gentle suggestions were all right. Just so long as Mesau did not forget her place...

She scanned though the information, and made mental notes on the location. The army was gathering not too far away from Edo…that was a bit of a distance. It would take the human daimyo days, if not weeks to be in a position where they could strike here. Mesau would know long before of any move they made. She made another mental note to set a watcher up, a crow.

The South…well. Information from her feathery minions was a little patchy there, as the Southern spies worked to counter her in the great game. But she had found what she wanted. Someone had contacted the spymaster there a week ago, Tanuma, and was planning on a meeting of great import. Unfortunately, she didn't know what it was about or when it would take place. Yet.

More coverage of yet another battle between a village and lesser youkai. Mesau felt a small tinge of regret. She should have been at her old village, defending it…but no. It was gone. She'd chosen this path, years ago. She watched the proceedings without much interest, skipping though several such battles. They were quite common these days.

Confirmation of the dismissal of a general by the name of Matsudaria in the south for Purist leanings had been given, as well. Perhaps Mesau could lure her in, find out what the demoted woman knew. Matsudaria might be of use to Mesau.

And…what was this? One of the regular observation points had been disturbed somehow.

A dark clearing, and a jagged hole in the ground. Mesau tapped her practical fingers thoughtfully. It was vaguely familiar…

Her eyes widened as she realized what had been buried in that hole, and she checked the information again, grimly remembering what, or rather, _who_ had been there. And he didn't seem to be there anymore…

There were two sets of tracks, and indications that a heavy object had been dragged thought the grass, as recent as a few hours ago…and then, nothing. The trail ended in the middle of the meadow. The crow must have just missed seeing who had removed him. It looked as though they had taken off into the air.

Two sets of footprints. Hmn. Who would have known where to look….? No one, absolutely _no one_, knew. Sesshoumaru had told no one where he was headed on that day, and Damia had been hard pressed to track him, he took such care not to be followed. They had made quite sure of the secret, the two of them. An unnamed grave, riddled with the promise of curses to the one who disturbed it… No ordinary human would dare touch it.

At least one of the tracks must have belonged to a miko, or a priest, probably, to unseal him. And a more powerful one than she'd known existed in this part of the world, if the unknown person, or persons, had freed Sesshoumaru from her spell. That was not good at all. Mesau was honest enough to admit she was only of modest miko power herself, but those bindings…Damia had lent her strength to them. With Damia behind her, it was the simple truth that she had become nearly as powerful as the great names of legend like Midoriko. Only the most powerful of the priests, or a miko of vast talent, could have broken those seals alone. Even two people working together would have to be very talented (and cooperative!) to unseal them.

Mesau only frowned slightly, though inside she was deeply troubled. She had met Sesshoumaru a few times prior to their little coup, and he'd always stuck her as rather unforgiving. Damia had admitted herself that she wasn't strong enough to take him head on, though after a year of consolidating power, that had changed. Back then it would have been an even fight, far too risky to gamble on face to face. Now, Damia should be strong enough to win.

And besides, Sesshoumaru would have to go through so many people to get to Damia... He couldn't have many allies at this point, and would stick out like a sore thumb. None but inu youkai possessed that shade of silver hair, and at present all the most powerful were in the castle, accounted for. Someone would see him, surely, and then…well. Problem solved. Even if he somehow, in a million to one chance, got close enough to strike, Damia backed by Mesau... Miko power and youki wedded together was enough to take him head on.

They would have to kill him, of course, and this time make sure. He couldn't be allowed to harm Damia, or her plans for ridding Japan of the foreign scum. Damia and her penchant for complicated executions...! Mesau was of the belief that if you meant to kill someone, you just_ did_ it, and didn't make it fancy. Simple was better.

That miko, or even several…those were worrisome.

Mesau stood up slowly, and directed the birds to head back out immediately, to scour the surrounding area. They had to find him, starting with the nearest villages, youkai _or_ human. The persons who had freed him were unknown. They might even have brought him back to a human village, if he was in bad enough shape. She knew her killing scroll had done some damage, though it was impossible to know how much.

Damia had to know of this immediately.

Mesau strode along the corridors, trying to look at all the information she'd gotten from battles in that area. The only miko she knew of living in the region was Kaede, and a new monk named Miro…something. Had it been them? It seemed unlikely… Kaede was known to her; not very powerful, but dependable. Miro…ka? Ku? She didn't know about him. Hadn't he been in the group chasing the Shikon a while back…? They had had a miko with them too, hadn't they? A foreign one, it was said, who had disappeared as mysteriously as she had arrived a little less than a year ago.

Mesau knew nothing about the miko but that, and that she had the Shikon. Damia had been somewhat aggrieved when the Shikon disappeared so thoroughly, since she'd wanted it herself. Mesau wouldn't mind having it either, but it hadn't been found so far. No use looking for what had vanished without trace when there were so many other things to tend to.

She knew where the old miko dwelt. She made a mental note to send a few origami crows to the village immediately, and the surrounding ones. Perhaps a traveler passing though had been responsible, not a local person at all…

Or perhaps it _was_ the foreign miko, with the Shikon. If that was the case, Damia would want to know, so she could get a hold of the powerful jewel for herself. Mesau doubted it, as the group had been with Inuyasha, and he had never liked Sesshoumaru much, and the miko probably wouldn't either; why would she free him? Unlikely. But perhaps...

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Kagome groaned as the faint light angled low across her eyes, signaling the false dawn. Her head _hurt_…and her eyes felt gritty, like she'd gone to sleep with sandpaper glued inside her eyelids. Or mud. Wincing, she cracked one open, only to shut it almost immediately. She opened her eyes again cautiously, ready for the annoyingly cheerful sun, the close-to-the-floor view of the world, and…a shadow?

Kagome sat up, and blinked at the pair of feet, and the long black hair, before who it was sunk in. "Oh! Sesshoumaru." She hadn't really recognized him, with the necklace's disguise…

Kagome sat up straight, glancing worriedly at the sun. It was early, yet. He wasn't annoyed by the wait, was he…? She glanced at him warily, unsure. After last night…

Bits and pieces flooded back. Kagome was still amazed. Had it changed anything? Would he resent her, the morning after she had seen him so vulnerable? She wasn't quite sure how to talk to him anymore...

"Hurry up. We should leave as soon as possible. You already said your goodbyes, I believe?" Sesshoumaru raised an eyebrow. Kagome had spent _far_ too much time last night saying goodbyes, and packing, making ready after cleaning off the mud…he had simply retreated to his preferred tree and gotten a decent amount of rest after a thorough scrubbing. Not enough sleep had resulted, but it would do.

Kagome winced. He didn't sound any different, and he wasn't acting any differently. Maybe a little more polite. He hadn't ripped her blankets off this time to wake her up, at least. She wondered…

Her head was pounding, and she sourly remembered that she'd spent most of the night talking, getting last minute advice, and trying to avoid questions of where she had been all evening. She'd put them off by telling them about tailing Sesshoumaru, then arguing about going on the trip. They seemed to accept her explanation…for now.

She'd caught the flash of relief on Sesshoumaru's eyes when she hadn't mentioned the rest of the nights activities, but really, who did he think she was? She wasn't going to share _that_…

Kagome got up slowly, and chased Sesshoumaru out of the house so she could get dressed. He was already wearing the 'human' necklace. He had suggested last night, on the way back to the village that they either travel as a pair of humans, or as a lesser youkai and an invisible miko. He had said they could travel during the day 'normally,' and then, at night, he would make them travel faster, as a youkai.

She'd pointed out that that left no time for sleep, at which he'd frowned, and said she could sleep while he moved them to the Southern domain. Fair enough… If he was willing to donate his puffy transportation cloud to their travel plans, she would go along with it.

Kagome got up, and checked her bag. It was fairly unobtrusive. A few meals, some feudal money, and a spare set of old, faded miko outfits, though in green instead of red, meaning she probably wouldn't be taken as a miko at first, were inside. Inuyasha's fire rat haori lay at the bottom. A knife at her side, and water, along with a few personal articles. Spare necklaces, the enchanted ones, and a very few 'cooking supplies' (Inevitably, instant ramen.) She thought she'd need to get a jewelry box for all the beads soon…

She put on another set of miko styled clothing, also green and white, and pulled back her hair in a more traditional way. Unlike her previous journeys, this one was dependent on stealth. Therefore, nothing from the future showed in her clothing, or in the bag, donated by Kaede. She had brought a few things from home, but not very much, and all hidden away. Kagome tucked the Shikon under her clothes, and grabbed her bow, adding the quiver to her outfit.

She stood for a moment, and grinned, glancing towards the door, where Sesshoumaru must surely be waiting. Ready to go and kick some ass, just like in the old days. A shadow crossed her face briefly. Except that Inuyasha wasn't here, was he? Kagome wondered again what he'd have thought of her becoming so close to Sesshoumaru, actually helping him. He wouldn't be happy, she knew, and she could accept that. Since coming back, she had accepted a lot, moved on. He would have wanted her to be happy, but at the same time, not gone anywhere within a few feet of Sesshoumaru, for reasons of health. But she also knew how important it was to do this. Kagome firmly moved any distracting thoughts away. Now wasn't the time.

Everyone else was still asleep. She had said goodbye last night, so she wouldn't wake them this early. She had also wanted to avoid any confrontation with Shippo…he'd been sulking all week that he couldn't come. Sesshoumaru had flatly refused to allow him along, and privately, Kagome was in agreement. Shippo meant well, but he was better protected here, much to his chagrin. He still insisted he was a grown man, er, fox…

Kagome smiled, and glanced towards the corner, where he was still sleeping. She crossed the floor, and left an enormous chocolate bar beside him that she had been saving for this occasion. She was sorry he couldn't come, but…that was just the way it was.

"Goodbye, everyone." Kagome grinned, and then marched out of the building, meeting Sesshoumaru outside.

He nodded his head curtly, and headed off towards the gate. They passed the guards with a nod, and good wishes for both the strange 'human guest,' and the village's miko before heading towards the main road.

They walked together for a while not saying anything, while around them the countryside lightened as the sun moved higher in the sky. Kagome touched the paper packed in the top of her bag. It was a map, showing the old provinces from just before Meiji that she'd photocopied from the library, figuring it might be more useful than a modern map. "Where are we headed first? Which roads…?"

Sesshoumaru said nothing for a while. It was almost, Kagome thought, as though last night had been a dream. He acted no different, at least. But somewhere, she knew, there was a feeling just below the surface that he'd…accepted her help. Up till now he'd been pushing her away. Kagome sensed he wasn't doing that anymore, though nothing had been said. But then again, words sometimes weren't needed. They only got in the way. She knew, in the way that she sometimes did, that something had passed between them which went beyond words.

Eventually, Sesshoumaru broke the silence, after she had almost forgotten the question.

"We are going to travel down the Nakasendou road, toward the human city of Osaka. From there, to Shikoku, where we will be in the South."

"Why not more directly there?" That seemed an odd way to go about it, especially considering that they followed a human road…

"The Nakasendou road is the traditional boundary between the East, and the Western domain. Most youkai don't use it, and I'd rather not meet any. I would rather not travel through either domain at the moment. The West is rather unwelcoming, while the East is neutral…but could go either way."

"Oh, I see." Kagome pondered this for a moment. At least now she knew where they were going, and why. She had to remember that this wasn't like going after the Shikon shards, where they could wander where they liked. Here, politics came into the picture and made it more murky. Actually, come to think of it, they had rarely seen Sesshoumaru outside the Western area when they'd run into him then.

"And you meant what you said about the traveling arrangements, right? Human by day to avoid detection, and travel faster at night?" He'd explained to her that the youkai were being watchful of who was traveling at the moment, and wanted to travel only by night because of it. Tensions always made people suspicious of travelers. By day, they could travel as humans. Youkai paid _far_ less attention to wanderers of that nature.

"If you can manage it, yes. I realize humans need more sleep than myself, but…" He was willing to do whatever it took to get South faster. He's sent a message to Tanuma, the spider of the south, and they _had_ to get there in three days to meet with him. He'd cut time too fine, perhaps, holding off on attending to personal business. So be it…

He'd left a few hints in the note passed to Tanuma that only the intended reader would understand, and Tanuma should at least be willing to meet and talk. From there, he planned to see if he could talk to Lord Tosa and Satsuma. Logically, if they moved by day as a nondescript pair of humans, and then disguised as a youkai with accompanying invisible miko by night, they should be there with half a day to spare.

_If_ the plan worked. They might need to rearrange their traveling itinerary if it didn't. They _had_ to get there on time. Sesshoumaru wasn't sure what would happen if they missed the appointed day, but it probably wouldn't be good. They simply had to get there, undetected, within three days.

This early, the road had no one else on it, though a farmer had passed by earlier. Sesshoumaru had been pleased to note that he had only glanced at them and muttered a friendly good morning to the two 'long haired ladies,' which Kagome had returned after a laugh. _He _hadn't, but no matter.

The morning passed in silence, broken only by the tramping of feet on the dusty road, and the few other travelers. The silence wasn't oppressive, though. It was simply the companionable, unsaid communication that people sometimes shared when there was no need for words. Kagome didn't mind. She was left to examine the country they passed though. Occasionally, she took out the map. She got Sesshoumaru to trace the route they were to take, and felt satisfied that she at least knew where they were going geographically. Otherwise, though…

In the early afternoon, Kagome pulled a few portable lunches from her bag, and they continued on, eating as they went. Sesshoumaru had made clear that speed was of the utmost importance, and she believed him. There was this feeling of events rushing forwards about his words that gave them an extra urgency.

"You know, you never told me why you want to see this Tanuma fellow." Kagome absently picked at a stray bit of rice, brushing it off her fingers delicately. "I know he's the spymaster down there, and you said you had a plan, that you had to talk to him about…but you never actually said what this plan _was_. In the details."

She glanced enquiringly at him, walking along beside her. His 'human' face was unreadable as his true face would have been, and Sesshoumaru did not answer.

"I mean, it would help if I knew what I was getting into…I might be of some use if I know what's happening."

Sesshoumaru blinked, and stared ahead. "True. I haven't finished working the fine points out yet. It depends, to some extent, on how fast we get South, whether we remain undetected, and Tanuma's own agenda."

"Yes, I know, you told us that already." Kagome grinned, and shaded her eyes. No one was on the road ahead of them, or behind. "There's no one listening, you know. And it would help. You admitted it yourself." She turned around, and stared at him, poking his sleeve with her finger. "Come on, spill the beans."

"What beans?" What did that mean…?

"It's a figure of speech. It means, basically, to tell me what's going on." Kagome smiled slightly, and then, as an afterthought, belatedly tacked "Please." onto the end of the sentence.

"Yes, yes. I told you that the South would be the most likely allies, correct?" Kagome watched Sesshoumaru's face closely. Nothing came through the stony mask to indicate what he thought.

"Uh huh. You said they were all Fellowship, and that some general who wasn't got kicked out down there a few weeks ago. And that the Fellowship are the 'peace, and love, and the new guys sure know how to throw a party' crowd, right?"

"Not the _precise_ words I'd have chosen, but yes." Sesshoumaru's voice was overlaid with a dry sort of humor. "The North is mostly Purist. Lady Ezo cannot control her generals any longer. She herself is neutral, but their actions are more to support Damia. She can't do anything, as things stand, or she risks an overthrow. The East is neutral. Until I was…removed…all the lands save the South were neutral, even North. The Lords know what will happen if either side gets the upper hand. They still do, but the balance has tipped. Now, at best, it will be the West and the North against South, with East standing to one side. At worst, the three lands will unite against the South. Aizu will follow the victor."

"They don't make it easy, do they?" Kagome worried her lower lip. "So you said you would go to the South, and try to call a council…of some sort?"

Sesshoumaru nodded slightly, eyes still fixed ahead of him on the road. "Tosa can call the council to the city. It is his right as a Lord. Once the Lords met in Aizu City, perhaps a solution could have been found though means other than war. It is not so much the lords who are at odds, but their generals, who perhaps do not see as far. If all four domains take action together things will return to an uneasy truce. It would be difficult, but not impossible. But that was _before_. With Damia there to upset the balance, and to spur on the Purists… a diplomatic solution like that becomes impossible."

"There's more to it than that, isn't there? This sounds as bad as the UN and social studies all over again, you know? Veto power, and everyone making rules for the good of all except the one causing the mess in the first place." Kagome grinned humorlessly. "Maybe we should head home, and kidnap a lawyer specializing in politics."

Sesshoumaru blinked. More modern gibberish. What would kidnapping a lawyer do for them? And what was a 'lawyer'…?

Kagome sighed. "But seriously, what are you going to do? You wouldn't plan on calling the council in Aizu like you told us a week ago if there wasn't more to it. Are you going to take over from Damia again? And why can't Tosa call it himself?"

"Tosa would not call it now, because there is no point without me, and he does not yet know I am alive. At present, it would be the lot of them and Damia in the chamber, fighting over the solution without ever resolving it. If I can just get in to talk with him, and form a plan, then there might be a chance. If he can get me into the council chamber, I will be able to invoke the right of blood debt. I cannot reclaim the leadership of the West that easily. Damia won it fair enough, as we reckon things. But, she killed many of the family in her takeover. One of the clan may challenge her over it. She made sure to kill anyone powerful enough to take her out, or get them on her side. But _I_ can take the challenge."

Sesshoumaru did not voice his doubts over what might happen then. Damia had defeated him before, which was not only a blow to the ego, but troubling in another way: She might do so again, if he fought her once more. Then they were _really_ in trouble... but he had to try, and this was the only way he could see, short of assassination. (Which wouldn't work anyway.)

Kagome rolled her eyes slightly. Sometimes, her life resembled cheesy B movies a little bit _too_ much. "So then once she's gone, you can take back your seat on the council and sign the deal?"

Sesshoumaru shook his head. It wouldn't be that easy. "No. But with Damia gone, perhaps the head of the movement can be cut off. If I move soon enough_, if_ she hasn't given it enough momentum, it might stop. The West won't be in my control, but it won't be in hers either. It is the only way to get close enough to her."

He fell silent for a long time, thinking. Even with Damia gone, _if _he could pull it off, the West would be in a state of chaos that would take years to fix. There was no guarantee that he would become lord again, although there was a good chance he might. He'd have to stall any hostile takeovers, discourage those trying to take advantage of the West in its weak state…if he even got to that point.

He knew Damia well, and she would not have taken him down, even by striking from behind, if she hadn't gotten something in the way of insurance. Sesshoumaru prided himself on his ability as a fighter, and knew that Damia was no his equal in an even match – the problem was, any math against her would not be a fair one, and he refused to stoop to her level, even to win.

The last time he had sparred with her, he had easily won, and since, he had seen her matches against others. That had been just under seventy years ago. In terms of purely physical strength he came out on top, and so Sesshoumaru was sure there was more to this than met the eye, to change that so drastically. Damia was hiding something. No matter how he'd tried to find out her true strength, he'd found only dead ends, and rumors, fed by his own speculation.

She couldn't have held on to the Western lands so well, or won some of the battles he'd heard about, without that unknown strength. He could not afford to assume anything. He knew he would only get close enough to strike this way. If he revealed he was alive beforehand, or tried to take her out like an assassin in the shadows, he wouldn't make it ten steps before he was seen, recognized, and killed without even coming close.

Beside him, Kagome wandered on, not mentioning that after hours of walking, her feet were _not_ happy with her. She hadn't worn her trusty walking shoes for this trip, but she was starting to wish that she had. These old fashioned sandals were making blisters, and it wasn't even halfway though the afternoon yet…

Kagome fished in her bag and brought out the watch she'd hidden there. It told her it was just coming up on 5 o'clock. She sighed, knowing they wouldn't stop for dinner for another few hours.

She glanced sideways at Sesshoumaru. He'd surprised her last night, and again today. He was hardly ever chatty, and he'd been quite willing to share information today. Last time they'd asked him about what he'd planned to do, he'd fobbed them off with mention of 'appeal,' 'council,' and 'go South'. Maybe last night had something to do with that…?

She didn't know. Mentally, Kagome shrugged, and tried not to concentrate overly much on her aching feet. She was older than when she'd gone after shards now, and she was not going to complain. For some reason, she wanted to prove to Sesshoumaru that he would not regret taking her along on this journey. She wasn't going to demand they stop for the night, and 'sit' him if he argued like her…rather immature…fifteen year old self had done with Inuyasha.

For starters, she just could not, ever, imagine 'sitting' Sesshoumaru. The two thoughts were mutually exclusive, somehow.

She watched people move along the road, and exchanged greetings like any other traveler would. They passed though a town, and did not stop. Kagome was glad to see they attracted no additional interest, though it was slightly odd they were not stopping for the night. Sesshoumaru just kept on walking, stride never wavering.

Night began to fall, slowly, twilight stretching up from the opposite horizon. They entered a forest, and the shadows began to stretch fingers, like an assassin's swirling cloak.

Assassin. Kagome frowned, and looked at Sesshoumaru. Had he…? "You told me Damia had made sure no one could get into the castle without her knowing, and that she'd tightened regulations on trade…were you trying to assassinate her, before? That's what you were up to for the past month, right?"

Kagome thought back on Sesshoumaru's nickname; aristocratic assassin. Aristocracy she could easily see. He acted like a spoiled noble lord. He even had the trappings that came with; a sword, some sparkling armor, and a nest of intrigue that made snakes look mild mannered by comparison. But she could not really see him as an assassin, sneaking around with a poisoned dagger, and concealing cloak. He'd made his dislike of guerrilla maneuvers plain.

"True enough. I cannot get close enough on my own. And I would much prefer to take the challenge face to face, in truth. I would like to see Damia know why she dies, and by whose hand." Sesshoumaru smiled, more a baring of teeth than a true smile, and Kagome shivered slightly at the hidden menace. Thankfully, it wasn't directed at her.

"Alright. I get why we're going. I get that you can invoke some old law to get to her. I don't get why we waited this long to do it. You could have done this a week after we got back."

Kagome smiled grimly. She was pleasantly surprised at the amount of information Sesshoumaru was giving her. Before today, she had known hardly anything of this plan. He had told them he was getting information, and seeing if there was a way within the defenses to get to Damia. Once he had decided there was no way to get close enough, even with the disguise, he had dropped that line of thought. He hadn't said anything about some old law about duels…

Sesshoumaru turned and looked at her, mouth set in a faint line just visible in the fading light. "I couldn't have put this into motion much sooner than this. It took me three weeks after the initial week of scouting the situation to find a reliable way to contact Tanuma, without giving away my location or the fact I'm alive. If I'd been Sorai it would have taken far less time. She has a web of contacts all over Japan, and quite a few outside. I, however, do not have nearly the personal resources of a spymaster. That is why the post exists. Delegation."

He looked at the road ahead of them thoughtfully, frowning as distant figure approached on horseback. "Although, I must admit, after this I might have to invest in a more extensive net of personal eyes and ears. I did not think ahead enough."

Kagome grinned a bit. "Yeah. So you couldn't get there any faster. Fair enough. Does Tanuma know it's you he's going to talk to?"

"He should. I reminded him of a few events that only I would know of. That will be enough. It got me in to talk to him, at the very least. He is interested, and he will listen. Once it is clear who he is dealing with, I am sure he will listen _very_ closely."

Kagome nodded thoughtfully. "Sounds fair. Thanks for telling me, you know. A girl likes to know what's happening, is all. I'm glad you let me come along. I'm not sure what help I'll be in some blood feud thing, but at least I can help keep us unnoticed." She grinned cheerfully, and kept walking. Maybe they could have dinner soon… She peered ahead on the road, noticing the people hurrying towards them ahead.

"Visitors, do you think?"

"Perhaps. Travelers. But be wary."

Kagome nodded, and fingered her bow, checking the string. Constant vigilance, indeed. A thought occurred to her about all this secrecy and games. "After this is over, you might just have to visit." She laughed suddenly. "I'll have to make you watch James Bond. Subbed of course. Dubbing…I'm not sure _what_ they do to the movies when they dub them, but the sound quality…urg."

Sesshoumaru blinked. "James Bond…?" Why did he have to watch this 'James Bond movie?' He knew what a film was by now, of course, but why…?

Sesshoumaru shook his head at Kagome and her seemingly habitual weird comments, and concentrated on the travelers hurrying along beneath the trees. They were only a few paces away by now. He stood to one side of the road, and let them pass, simmering on the inside at the delay. The people did not look in their direction at all, and went on past. They were not interested in a lone set of strangers, clearly. That was both good, and bad. Good, as they had not been recognized, and bad for his temper.

Kagome watched them go, and then turned around, dismissing the travelers. She waited until they were half a kilometer down the road before starting the conversation again.

"Yeah. James Bond. He's a famous spy, and there's about 20 movies starring him." She laughed "I feel like Q, with all these necklaces…"

Sesshoumaru raised an eyebrow. "A _famous_ spy? Such are often dead, very quickly." His voice gave off the sharp impression that he didn't think highly of this.

"It isn't real, silly! It's only a movie. Made up. Although now you mention it, he would actually make a pretty bad spy. He tends to blow everything up…" Kagome sniggered, imagining herself in a 007 movie. Watch out, here comes the mighty miko, and she's ready to blow you up with arrows of mass destruction!

Beside her Sesshoumaru grew silent, although the strange smile on Kagome's face puzzled him. Some time after that, when full dark had fallen, he called a halt.

Kagome sat down, breathing ragged. She forced herself not to mention anything about the burning in her feet, or the large hole eating its way through where her stomach would normally be.

"We're stopping…does this mean I get to eat?" She grinned good humouredly, and sighed, leaning back into the tree. She glanced at Sesshoumaru, and, seeing he wasn't looking, kicked off her sandals and rubbed her feet. Stupid blisters… why did she have to forget the moleskin? Or something else to deal with them…?

Sesshoumaru looked at her sharply out of the corner of his eye. He'd been noticing her limping, slightly slower pace for some time now. He'd almost forgotten about dinner. He didn't need to eat nearly as often as she did. He felt a twinge of guilt. She was hiding the tiredness she must be feeling, probably. Just for a moment he felt sympathy, but he couldn't allow their pace to slow for her, and they both knew it. Too much depended on it. "Rest, for a bit. After this, we will try the other traveling arrangements." Unfortunate that they couldn't stop for longer; Kagome needed the rest, but... he simply couldn't afford it.

Kagome sighed, digging around in her pack for something quick to eat. She turned up a pack of instant ramen, and started crunching on the dried noodles, too hungry to bother with the hassle of a fire. "Alright, fine. You said you'd conjure the puffy cloud thing. And change necklaces. Remind me which one, again…?"

Sesshoumaru glanced down at the prayer beads around his neck, and took out the second one he owned, which would make him look like a soldier, before pausing. "Perhaps…I had planned on this one. Might I examine that…invisibility one?" Kagome shrugged, and handed it over before going back to work on her rather sad 'dinner.'

Sesshoumaru put it on, and glanced back at Kagome. He wondered it wearing it would also render the cloud invisible. Kagome looked up, then sighed, unable to see or sense him. She didn't appear too worried about whether he would leave her behind, even.

Sesshoumaru laughed soundlessly, and shook his head. Far too trusting, perhaps…or perhaps not. He had no intention of leaving her behind, after all. He trusted her, and she trusted him. Still amused, he summoned the cloud, and sighed. It was quite visible.

He drifted over to Kagome, who saw the rider-less cloud and grinned. "I don't think that works like that. It only covered the wearer …good idea though." Kagome wondered just how much that necklace covered. She didn't really know, she realized. Bad thing not to know.

Sesshoumaru removed the necklace, and shrugged, donning the other instead. "No matter. We must be going again soon."

After a few more minutes of rest, Kagome sighed, and then arranged herself on the cloud, well away from the edge. "Try and keep me from falling off if I do fall asleep, alright? I'll hold on so you know where I am."

Boldly, Kagome took hold of the currently invisible tail (Sesshoumaru's disguise did not feature a tail. She thought he looked a bit like the thunder brothers had, actually, or at least, like the better looking one…)

She settled herself a bit more, and then put her own disguise on. She grinned as the cloud took off, and the tail settled over her shoulder, anchoring her firmly. She yawned, and blinked as the wind picked up. She was glad of the extra warmth from the fur. Was it just her, or had Sesshoumaru been…actually nice today, of all things?

Vaguely she wondered why, before the long day caught up and she began to feel sleepy. She wriggled around to get comfortable, and sighed happily. She wound her fingers in the tail, and closed her eyes. Sesshoumaru wasn't that bad, really…big soft puppy, some days…

An inaudible snore trailed in the wind behind the two, as they traveled ever closer to their destination.

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Elsewhere, Mesau frowned. She folded more paper crows, and sent them on their way, through the window. Her fingers had long since memorized the pattern, and she let them work automatically, mind elsewhere. Damia had not been pleased to hear of her…escapee.

Mesau's face twisted. Fine, Damia could be as unhappy as she liked, so long as she stopped making unfair accusations about it being Mesau's fault. It wasn't – there had been outside help, and without someone there to reinforce the spell against attack, it was sure to come undone sooner or later. Why bother to keep harping about it?

Of course, Damia had seen no need to post a guard, not after they'd buried the bastard in a hole, but… Mesau shook her head. She had agreed to no more precaution than a watch bird, so it was her fault as well.

After a year, he would be weakened, easy prey if caught soon enough. And they had grown in power, the pair of them. She had learned methods for increasing her own power, and had spent long hours perfecting her skills. It wasn't always strength, but how you used it that counted. She knew this very well. Damia did as well, and, in their uneasy alliance, both were stronger than the sum of the parts. Mesau was optimistic they could take him this time. Damia would not allow a failure again, nor did Mesau think it would be necessary.

All that remained to do was find him, and then take him down. After all, why would someone go to the trouble of digging him up and leaving him somewhere, still sealed? He had to be awake.

Damia wanted Mesau to comb the nearest villages, and find out where he had gone. More birds had been sent to Kaede's village, to look for that monk and keep tabs on the old miko. Mesau had already sent half the flock to the South the watch the roads, as well as some of their best operatives. While they were there, they would watch Tanuma.

The Southern puppet-meister was up to something, Mesau was sure of it. Something big was going on, and she had only the vaguest idea of what it might be. He was meeting someone important. Or at least, meeting _about_ something important. The fact that her operatives could pick nothing up led her to believe it was only being talked about at the highest levels. She had to get a lead on it, soon! The whole past week she'd been trying to get an inside on what was happening.

She finished another crow, and breathed life into it with a soft whisper of feathers. One more soldier to guard Japan.

Why _now _of all times, just when they had finally been able to put their own plans into action? Mesau had never heard of a man named Murphy, but if she had, she'd have been cursing his laws of the universe.

Damia had begun the slow, but sure, nudging of the East towards their own goals. Mesau pushed from the shadows, and Damia had sent a delegation off, in the open. The North was nearly theirs, the generals there starting to make decisions on their own, regardless of Lady Ezo's pleas for restraint. The North was ready to help fight off the invaders, thanks to Kyokei's efforts.

South…well, the Southern Lord and Lady were powerful, but not unduly so. Sooner or later, they would fall. The meddlesome fools were practically inviting the outlands into Japan with open arms! Three on one was good enough odds for even Tosa to think carefully. Aizu City, with the way it was now, would follow whoever won. She intended to make sure it was them. Mesau had been willing to go so far as to ally herself with youkai to try and help her land, and after so much, she couldn't stop now.

Just a little more time, that was all she needed. And then she could drive the foreign strangelings from their shores, the ones carrying odd weapons, and even odder ideas. She knew they were poison, had already seen her own village tainted by it. It couldn't be allowed to spread. She, who had once been a healer, knew the best way to deal with venom; drive it out, by whatever means necessary.

Mesau's chiseled face smiled grimly. Japan had to be free, or it would fall. She'd _seen_ it, seen what would happen if they because a colony, a country of chattel. The fog of opium would descend, and their once proud people would fall to ruin within a hundred years. She had seen the future, after all. The continent had already begun to rot in this fashion, the Ming Emperor stagnating, letting the soft government fall apart from within…. She had seen the future there, and knew it led to ruin.

To stop that from happening to her own people, she would even ally herself with youkai…

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_Thanks so much for the reviews last chapter, guys! I loved reading them – they make the world (well, my world, at least) a better place. Lol. Thanks so much!_

_There we go – Just posted the beta'd version of this. Thanks, Trisak! -_

_Please review, and let me know what you think. (grin – reviews make **excellent** 'over the internet' presents, by the way….lol) _


	25. ch24:Tanuma

Unbeta'd

**:: Tanuma ::**

Kagome turned, and yawned, closing her mouth on an unexpectedly placed bit of fur. She blinked, and choked, coughing.

She poked at the fur sleepily, puzzled as to what it was and why it was placed _there_, and frowned as she encountered a shoe. Her half closed eyes traveled up, up, up…and then widened as she remembered where she was: On Sesshoumaru's personal marshmallow of a cloud.

"Bah." She blinked, and squinted against the predawn light. Her body ached, dully, and she gradually became aware of the fact that she was traveling at a great speed, and that she'd fallen asleep resting against Sesshoumaru's bony knees.

Kagome grimaced, and sat up. "Morning, all." She grinned tiredly as she said it, aware that she was inaudible. Good thing she was wearing the 'cloak of invisibility' too, or Sesshoumaru might have noticed her accidentally trying to swallow part of his tail. Kagome winced. He'd been…unusually nice over the past few days. Or at least not deliberately scathing and argumentative, which amounted to the same thing from him.

It was starting to really creep her out.

She was _not_ used to a Sesshoumaru that actually listened to what she was saying with some vague amount of interest, and then answered. It was…disconcerting. She almost wished for a return to the old Sesshoumaru, but took back her thoughts immediately. Creepy it might be, but it was also better. She'd take the weird Sesshoumaru over the biting, sarcastically intractable one any day of the week.

Kagome straightened up a bit more, and peered at the lightest part of the sky. They were traveling just above the trees, and the sea was behind them. They must be on the northern shores of Kyushu, then. Almost there.

Squinting against the wind of their passage, bitterly chilled now that she was not protected by a fluffy tail, she pulled off the necklace, and tucked it away in her bag, watching as they descended in a gentle curve. It was getting to be far too light to fly openly. Kagome squinted at the reflection of sun on the water, and the far hint of green. At this rate, they should reach the large, southernmost island of Japan in only a few minutes, just ahead of the sunrise.

Soon enough, they landed on a beach. Sesshoumaru hovered a few centimeters above the sand in a nonchalant way. Kagome hopped off the cloud, stretching the kinks out of her system. "Oooh. I'm glad we're here. Trying to sleep on a cloud isn't very fun, once you actually _do_ it. I wonder what those mattress companies would say if they knew…"

Sesshoumaru landed lightly beside her, and made the cloud vanish after concentrating briefly. He wondered what sort of modern drabble she was spouting this time. "Hush. We're not far from Buzen, now. That is the youkai capitol of the south. We must be wary."

He watched as Kagome nodded, and frowned. He couldn't tell what she was thinking now. He hoped she took the warning to heart; there were dangerous youkai around now. He didn't like the thought of them discovering they were here, and harming her.

He banished all thoughts of that, and concentrated on the immediate area. He had not detected any observation so far, but that could change. He almost wished Kagome had kept the concealing beads around her slender throat, though he couldn't say why. He knew how to act in a situation like this, while she didn't, perhaps that was it. It made him nervous.

Now that they were here, and so close to the southern capitol, the danger increased yet again. Nobody had cared to look for two lone travelers, out in the middle of nowhere. But he was sure that there were those watching the south, and who might see him as well if he was careless or unlucky. He'd have to remain concealed within this illusion for most of the time they were here, he suspected. There were too many eyes that might belong to someone who reported to Damia.

Sesshoumaru paused to get his bearings, matching the landscape against what he remembered from his last visit. Tanuma had said to meet him not too far from Buzen, 'in the clearing with "that huge waterfall."'

Of course, unless you knew that the clearing was actually home to a _small _waterfall, and that Tosa had been really miffed about that fact, it made no sense. It was a test, clearly. On that long ago hunting trip, only Tosa, Tanuma, himself and two others, now deceased, had been present. If he went to the clearing on the other side of Buzen, the one with the large falls, he'd have failed. Sesshoumaru smiled grimly. From here on out, he had to concentrate on everything.

He set off in the direction he remembered, Kagome following silently behind him.

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_The bird watched the trees, flitting from side to side in the imitation of life. The small amount of intelligence it possessed urged it to follow the figure that had emerged from the castle, and record everything it 'saw.'_

_Tanuma. That was the name of the darkly colored, whip thin youkai it followed. The bird had had the description burned into its mind from the moment it was first created from a sheet of paper. Every twist and fold of thin rice fibers had added more information, until the false crow could have picked the rake thin youkai from a crowd at a glance, or seen though most of the disguises the spymaster was wont to use. Today, there was no attempt to hide. Tanuma was simply emerging though the small gate, and headed off for a walk. He often did, and most times, he didn't even use the walk as a means of collecting information. It was simply...a walk. For now. A human observer might have become bored, lax in watching. It was a simple routine to watch._

_But, not knowing anything else, the bird followed as though bound with a geas. Routine meant nothing to its endless watching. Much like an ancient's golem, the automation kept to its task. Crow eyes noted every stop to observe the forest with the same keenness they had watched secret meetings. The crow stayed just on the edge of vision, too far away to hear. Previous experience had shown that Tanuma had an unfortunate tendency to sense spiritual power, and Mesau had commanded her army of feathered underlings to stay on the edge of sight unless something of import came up. _

_Unseen, the crow followed._

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Kagome shivered as she followed Sesshoumaru into the forest that had closed in soon after the beach ended. Scraggly trees dripped water on her head, and soon, she was beginning to shiver. The water had begun to seep into her clothing, turning it into a heavy, wet mess. Something smelled faintly of damp dog. It was times like this that she missed her bright yellow raincoat. The feudal equivalent was doing zip for keeping her dry, or warm!

She glanced up through the trees. The sky had grown overcast, and she feared it might rain. She shook her head, and followed after Sesshoumaru, cursing as the undergrowth held her back and scratched at her exposed hands.

"Hey! Wait just a sec!" Glancing ahead, she could see Sesshoumaru flowing though the woods with ease, gliding though the growth as though it wasn't there, a piece of white, morning fog. He stopped and turned around, waiting patiently for her to catch up impassively. Kagome flushed silently as she came closer, feeling like she must be making enough noise to alert the whole forest.

Sesshoumaru said nothing, but she wondered what he thought. Had he lost patience at last? But he only turned away when she'd caught up, and continued. She wondered why he hadn't taken the necklace off, and shrugged. As they had grown closer to their goal, he had become more silent, until he was nearly the same youkai as he had been a week ago. Yesterday he'd been mildly chatty, and this morning, she'd dared to hope the nice streak might continue. She'd been far too optimistic, Kagome thought with a scowl. He had barely said five words to her after they'd landed on the beach.

Oh well. Kagome should have expected it wouldn't last. So why did she feel so... disappointed? She hadn't been hoping that he'd perhaps grown a little more friendly, had she…? Kagome grinned wryly. She _had_ been, she realized. She'd reached out when she thought he needed a shoulder to lean on, and had been hoping…

She'd actually been hoping that the proud, I've-got-more-ice-than-a-glacier Sesshoumaru might unbend a little for her. Melt. What a strange idea. Kagome tried to tell herself it was only what she could have expected. Sesshoumaru needed someone to be there for him like he needed a…well,_ not_ a third arm, he might be able to use that since he was already down _one_…but…

Somehow, it didn't do much to ease the hollow ache that had appeared somewhere in the region of her stomach. She shouldn't have tried to do it, shouldn't have grown attached…

But she had. And she'd have done it again. Kagome hardly dared admit it, but she'd actually grown quite fond of Sesshoumaru over the months time since he'd fallen at her feet in a heap.

Of course it was nothing else. Nothing at all.

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Sesshoumaru didn't need to turn around to know exactly where the miko was. He stifled a sigh, and resisted the urge to turn around and point out that they were in unknown territory here, and shouldn't be making noise, but resisted the impulse. It had been like this all morning. She wouldn't be any quieter if he pointed it out, and there wasn't time for a lesson in deep stealth. He closed his eyes with a grimace, and kept going.

Not that she was actually loud, he admitted quietly. He was beginning to be impressed at how much she had managed to learn in only a months time. Kaede had at least taught her the basics of tracking, and movement in the forest. If they had been going against human hunters, she wouldn't have easily been noticed. But youkai... youkai would hear her, even if she was being quiet – for a human.

Sesshoumaru sighed, and decided that, if they ever had the time, he was going to teach her how to move through the world more silently than a youkai ninja, with less noise than the wind. She could use the lessons, and it might help pay her back for everything, teaching her what she ought to know to survive. Sesshoumaru didn't want to see Kagome die because she didn't know how to protect herself, especially if he could have taught her something that might have saved her life. Tracking...he might add his own knowledge to the lessons the tajiya had promised for hand to hand combat...or a sword...

He shook his head, and turned back to the present,mildly amused at the thoughts that had come from his musing. He would never have thought, once, that he would be contemplating giving lessons to a miko. Never...

He shook his head, still surprised. There would be no time for that later if they did not do something about Damia now. Focus on Tanuma. They were about an hour away from the cabin, at this rate. Good, that would be just enough time to see the there for noon, which was the appointed time. Sesshoumaru ran over what he remembered of Tanuma in his mind, mentally preparing himself for the task at hand.

The kitsune known as Tanuma was quite, reserved, a shadow that haunted the southern court, taking everything in and never passing it on. Tanuma never said more than a few words at a time if he could help it. It probably made it easier to keep the many secrets he held.

Sesshoumaru blinked the thought away, and paid attention to the surroundings. They, or he, would probably know Sesshoumaru was coming from a kilometer away because of Kagome's racket, but it couldn't be helped. Hopefully, any spies from the West would let them past without thinking them worth comment.

That was the real danger, now. Nobody watched the Nakasendou road. Youkai never used it, which was why they had used that way to travel here. Youkai _especially_ never watched humans, which is what they had been pretending to be. The real danger was when they were closest to achieving their goal.

Grimly, cautiously, Sesshoumaru advanced, Kagome noisily bringing up the rear.

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Tanuma paused just outside the log cabin, frowning. Had something...? He paused, and didn't turn around, pretending to examine the door. Was someone tracking him here? There was a faint tingle at the back of his neck.

He hadn't said he was doing anything but going on a walk today. Normal enough. He often went on walks, and not all of them involved 'work' either. In fact, most didn't; he only took time out of his morning meditations for _really_ urgent tasks.

Perhaps it had begun to create a pattern, a dangerous one. Had someone noticed...? He strained his ears, eyes, all his senses, waiting for something.

Nothing. He must be imagining things, the combination of nerves and disbelief creating sudden sounds out of thin air.

Tanuma shook his head after he entered the cabin. Nothing.

Could it really be Sesshoumaru he was meeting after all this time, when he was supposedly dead, or at least vanished...?

Tanuma had never been completely satisfied with the accounts he'd heard of Sesshoumaru's demise. All his information had come from Damia, and rumor, neither of which was a reliable source. The Taiyoukai had simply _vanished_ one day, reported dead.

He'd known nothing of an affair with a woman, as rumors painted it, and surly there'd have been news of that before now! Popular story said a human woman was the reason, highly unlikely. And a sudden death followed by a change in leadership seemed just a little...suspect. But there was nothing to be done about it now; that was politics for you. Winner writes history, loser gets no say at all. Cynical, perhaps. But often the truth.

He narrowed his eyes, ears listening for anything out of the ordinary. He was probably worried over nothing. Nevertheless, Tanuma remained on guard, more so than before.

He loosened his sword in its sheath, standing in the center of the room. Just in case. One did not become a spymaster by practicing carelessness. He let his eyes take in the room, unchanged since it had been used as a hunting lodge years ago. It had fallen into disrepair, but it would serve for this meeting. He'd still be able to get out in a hurry if needed at least.

If his contact showed up, he would show up, Sesshoumaru or not. If not, it had been simply a waste of time, or the beginnings of a trap. But it had been worth the risk, so he'd come. Nothing was without risk.

Tanuma sat back, content to wait.

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Mesau started, as the bird she had set to tail Tanuma began to appear in her thoughts. Carefully, she dragged her materials over, and began to take control of the puppet bird, letting her thoughts travel down the island, towards the south, her hold tenuous over such distance.

She drew on the extra power Damia represented, and grinned as it was reluctantly given. Suddenly, the distance meant nothing at all. Damia had allowed her to borrow this power, for such an important meeting. But it was not lightly given, and Mesau knew she'd have one very angry youkai on her hands if she did not deliver.

Slowly, the image of a ramshackle log cabin appeared, and _then_ _she was in the false mind of the bird, looking though its eyes. Distantly, as though through a fog, she saw the opposite side of the workroom, the familiar tools of her trade overlaid on the image of greenery, a birds eye view of the world. In the center of the clearing, a worn down cabin appeared. Tanuma was inside. She knew it. And he was alone. Nothing had happened...yet. But it would. She need only wait._

_Mesau blinked, and checked to see that there were no other entrances to the cabin, once the disconcerting feeling of being in two places at once passed. She circled at a distance, a far away speck. At this range she couldn't see much, and heard nothing at all, but it would suffice until Tanuma's unknown guest appeared. _

_Mesau settled down to wait._

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Sesshoumaru paused, and glanced up at the sun. He was sure they were almost there. He glanced back at Kagome, squashing the annoyance he felt at hearing the noise. To an inu youkai, she sounded like a bear in a teahouse. It continually amazed him that other youkai with lesser hearing, or humans, would not have noticed at all.

He shook his head, and continued, stopping just beyond the clearing, waiting for her to catch up. He caught a glimpse of weathered logs though the trees, and narrowed his eyes. They were here.

Kagome came up beside him wincing at the stinging scratches on her hands. She thought she'd managed to find every patch of nettles between here and the beach.

She looked over in the clearing, frowning. "Is this it?" Kagome kept her voice as low as she could make it, narrowing her eyes at the ramshackle log house. It looked like it had been abandoned for years...

"Yes. Hush, for now. It is time for the meeting." Sesshoumaru sent her a stern look, and Kagome got the distinct impression that he was to do the talking. Fair enough. She had no idea how to go about that side of things anyway. She was here for the ride, when you got right down to it, since with this, at least, she would be no help.

Sesshoumaru began to move forwards again, still wearing his disguise, and Kagome followed him, trying her best to remain quiet like Kaede had taught her.

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Tanuma frowned as he heard the noise. The loud crackling of branches couldn't be Sesshoumaru's footsteps approaching, could it? The aristocratic assassin, if this _was _he, had never been less than silent death. Tanuma listened, and positioned himself near the cracks in the logs, watching. This wasn't Sesshoumaru, surely...too loud. He couldn't see anything yet, but he heard the faint chatter of a female voice.

He felt a hot surge of disappointment run through him. It had been silly to think that Sesshoumaru was alive after all. But then... well... it would have solved a number of problems ...

Wishful thinking. He listened to the unknown voices, two of them, and straightened. He'd find out who had come soon enough, and what they wanted. If it wasn't Sesshoumaru, then who could it be?

Probably a trap. Tanuma's thin lips turned upwards in the barest hint of a feral smile. A poor trap, if they gave themselves away this early. So be it. One must go though the motions of civility, at least, before the trap was sprung. He moved into position within the cabin, a loaded spring.

He was good at waiting.

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Sesshoumaru stepped forwards, Kagome following behind him. He was a little apprehensive, but kept his emotions in check. Second nature, after more than a hundred years of fending off the intrigues of court with a mask of indifference. Bracing himself, he knocked.

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Tanuma's eyes widened a barest hint of a fraction, as he watched the unlikely pair leave the forest. A human, and a youkai. The girl carried a bow, and wore green and white. Not even a miko..._they_ always wore red. What kind of human would dare be involved with youkai so casually? Even the people who lived in the south were never that flippant. He looked a little closer, and answered his own question. A beautiful woman...that was one possibility. He'd have to see.

Tanuma shook his head, and examined the taller youkai slightly in front of the woman. Cream, long hair, and the markings of some of the most minor branches of the dog clan... The armor was in the style of the west. A foot soldier in the army, perhaps? The particular family escaped him – there were so many minor clan branches, and nobody bothered to note them all. And it looked like the youkai was a mutt anyway. It would be hard to track him down, even if the spymaster knew where he came from. No information there for this meeting.

Tanuma stepped away from the door, into the center of the room, hand lingering over the katana at his side. Unless there were more youkai he hadn't sensed around, he should be able to take the pair easily. But appearance was deceptive. He himself was a very good example of that.

A knock. Tanuma didn't answer it. He watched the door open after a few seconds, and forced himself to relax. Tension slowed you down. Fluidity in a fight was far more important.

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_Mesau's eyes, bird eyes, watched the pair leave the forest, and she frowned, noting the lone, unlikely human and the low level foot soldier. Either it was a spy dressed as a westerner, reporting directly to the higher ups ...which would mean she had a **serious** breach of security on her hands, if **this** was the first she knew about it..._

_Or it was something else. A traitor, perhaps. Mesau's eyes took note of every detail, and she started writing things down, the motions of brushwork overlaying the forest slightly disconcerting. She didn't know who this youkai was offhand, but the markings and cut of the armor she was noting should help trace him. Damia would know where he came from, if she did not._

_Cautiously, the bird-that-was-not-a-bird drifted closer, leaving a single black feather hanging in the air, before it drifted to the ground like a lonely scrap of dusky paper. _

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Behind the mask, Sesshoumaru's eyes remained steady. It was Tanuma, all right. And if he was to make a guess, that slightly too casual stance meant the other youkai was ready for a fight if they proved dangerous. Sesshoumaru almost smiled. Yes, they must look _terribly_ threatening, disguised as an unknown mutt and a human, one who didn't even wear the colors of a miko! Kagome seemed nothing more than a frail human woman, like this...

Sesshoumaru stepped inside quickly. Behind him, Kagome frowned slightly, as though she had felt something, then her face smoothed. She stood just inside the door, giving them a bit of room.

"Tanuma." It was a statement, not a question.

A brief nod. "Indeed. And you?"

Sesshoumaru nearly grinned. He'd managed to fool the spymaster of the south, with Kagome's help. The master of a thousand faces himself! Kagome was more powerful than she knew. Should he tell her, after...?

"I apologize for the deception. It was necessary to come here unseen." Sesshoumaru inclined his head, and then removed Kagome's priceless necklace from about his throat.

He couldn't resist adding the flourish.

...But it was worth it to see the slight shock on Tanuma's face.

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So. This unknown youkai who'd just walked in knew who he was. Tanuma spared a glance for the human woman, and then turned most of his attention to the youkai. He watched the other reach up, and pull away a string of beads. What...?

...Sesshoumaru!

Tanuma blinked, shocked. And then he nearly laughed, putting the dog youkai together with the unknown woman behind him. "Don't tell me those stories about the human woman were true..." _Was_ this woman with him...?

He kept his tone flippant, but underneath, Tanuma was beginning to become quite angry. If Sesshoumaru had actually wandered off for over a year with a human, and neglected his duty so badly because of it... eloping while the world went to hell in a handbasket was not going to win the aristocratic assassin any friends!

There had better be a damn good explanation!

He watched the woman by the door, her face becoming startled. "Of course not! You think I...!" She laughed, and shook her head, grinning ruefully. "Nope. Not even close. But before we get started, I want to put this ofuda up. It will keep away prying eyes and ears. I thought I felt something when we came in, watching the back of my neck, and I don't want to take chances."

Tanuma raised his eyebrows, but nodded. He watched her go to work, and then sit back on her heels, grinning. "There! I did it! Kaede has to hear about this..."

Kagome smiled brightly, proud of her achievement. She had actually managed to erect a ward without doing anything...bad. Like blowing them sky high...

"Alright! You can talk all about stuff now, and nobody is going to hear."

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_The bird slowed, as Mesau directed it to fly lower down, close enough to hear what was going on. With nobody watching, she aimed for the roof. She should be able to sit right there, and..._

_Mesau's paper creation hit the unseen wall, and shock waves rippled through the bird, slamming into Mesau, so many miles away. A barrier...!_

_Where on earth had that come from? Mesau's face darkened, as she slammed up against the block once more. Nothing was getting out, or in. She couldn't see inside the house, and she couldn't hear anything. Furious, the bird settled on a branch, glowered at the ward with beady eyes. Should she take it out? Yes, that seemed a good idea. Mesau started searching for a way in, seething as it became clear that the barrier would not give way lightly, not without alerting everyone inside as clear as if she'd hit them over the head with a mallet. _

_Damn. Mesau decided to wait, searching for a hole**, any** hole that would let her in unobtrusively._

_Why a **spiritual** barrier, though? Mesau observed it carefully. This was of the sort one could set up with an ofuda, without the aid of a priest or priestess, once it had been written. Were the youkai trading with a miko...?_

_Or was this the work of the same person, or persons, responsible for freeing Sesshoumaru?_

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Tanuma raised his eyebrows another half notch as he finally placed what the woman was. A miko. Sesshoumaru was walking around with a miko. Even if she didn't wear traditional red, he knew her for what she was. "So. Rumor paints you as slave to a woman's beauty, a _mortal _woman, no less, and now you appear long after we thought you dead, with a miko." He turned back to Sesshoumaru, ignoring Kagome.

Kagome frowned. It _did_ kind of seem that way, didn't it...? Oh dear... "Er...you don't want me to hear? I can go, it's no problem..." She shook her head, and sighed. Typical of her luck...

Sesshoumaru shook his head "I trust her, Tanuma. You will too, once you know the story. I have heard what lies Damia has been spinning after she tried to kill me. Make no mistake; they are nothing but stories. Kagome is an ally." His tone made it clear he thought Tanuma was an idiot for even suggesting the idea that he'd run off with _Kagome_, of all people, as a lover.

Although, the funny thing was, he_ did _trust her, Sesshoumaru realized. He trusted Kagome completely, and with far more than the information in this room. Although Tanuma probably didn't believe it, it was the simple truth that had sprung up between the two of them, somewhere along the line. You trusted your friends, the people close to you. He had tried to keep himself aloof for so long, not wanting to be hurt again, but Kagome had shown him that that wasn't always a bad thing, that opening up had its good points, as well as bad. At least then, you had people to share both good, and bad, with. He had her now.

Kagome smiled, suddenly touched that he had actually said out loud that he trusted her. She knew he trusted her, knew it in her bones, but hearing it said in such lofty company made all the difference. Somewhere under all the layers, he must care about her just a little bit. Just a little caring for a friend, and comrade at arms. Kagome smiled to hear it.

"Alright. Fine. So tell me, what is the former lord of the west doing with a miko? Why haven't you come to us before now, to stop things before they got to this point?" It was almost an accusation, though he took care not to let the anger in his voice become visible in front of Sesshoumaru. Tanuma wasn't convinced the woman should remain, but let it be. If she was this deeply involved, it couldn't be helped.

Sesshoumaru grimaced. "Long story short, I could do nothing. Damia tried to kill me, but only succeeded in trapping me in one of Mesau's spells instead. Kagome freed me, and I have been walking the world again for only a month. I have been trying to piece together what happened while I was sealed. I came as soon as I could. I would not have abandoned my duty if I could avoid it, Tanuma. You know this."

"Yes, I do." He_ also_ knew that the Sesshoumaru he was familiar with did not walk around with humans, much less a miko, claiming to trust her. Rin was one thing, a child. Children were a law unto themselves, especially in a race that had so few offspring. But a grown woman, a miko...a miko named Kagome, no less. Was it the same one who had once traveled with Inuyasha...?

Perhaps it was a matter of convenience. Damia had Mesau. So Sesshoumaru had engaged Kagome. That had to be it. Tanuma couldn't imagine it was anything else. Sesshoumaru had to know that he could not hope to defeat Damia if he did not somehow match the power Mesau represented. Sesshoumaru had no room in him for anything but practicality. That resolved, Tanuma felt a little better about having the miko in on this conversation.

"I understand. What do you want me to do, then?" There had to be a reason the former lord of the West had come to him now, and he could bet he knew why...

"I want to talk to Tosa. This seemed the easiest way to go about it. I want him to call the council of Aizu. Damia will be forced to come, or risk war too soon, and she has a debt to pay. She cannot avoid a challenge there. That was the easiest way to get to her. With her gone, and Tosa and Satsuma's aid, perhaps we can, if not fix this, at least return to an uneasy truce. We cannot afford war amongst ourselves, not when the far west of Europe circles, waiting to enter a land ripe for the picking."

Tanuma nodded slowly. That seemed in order. He had often thought that, if someone like Sesshoumaru could just knock out Damia...then the remaining three more level headed lands might, with a _lot_ of work, avoid conflict. If they did it soon enough, of course... "I see. A good plan. Something must be done, and we cannot be seen to change events. You, however, might be able to." Tanuma nodded.

"Give me half a day, less, to return to Buzen. I shall arrange for you to enter the city unseen." He smiled, slightly "Though with a disguise as good as that, you should be fine. Your work, lady miko?"

"Yes." Kagome's cheeks turned a delicate, seashell pink.

"You have some power, girl. I hope you continue to use it for our mutual benefit, for the time being." Tanuma nodded, impressed despite himself. Sesshoumaru hadn't been wrong; the miko was a powerful ally if she could manage feats of that sort.

Kagome smiled, pleased. "I want Japan to be safe. Of course I'll help."

"Good. You recall the back entryway into the castle, do you not, Sesshoumaru? The blue door?"

A brief nod.

"If you come just before sunset, bearing packages from town for delivery, you will both be allowed in." Tanuma frowned. "Pardon for not offering better hospitality, but I do not think we will put you in the west wing, in the rooms you once used as taiyoukai. Truthfully, they are not yours anymore. Damia _did_ claim the west legitimately enough by defeating you, and holding her enemies at bay. Just as it would be yours if you defeated her and held it again. And something like cleaning out the apartment would spread. I shall have to see what can be done about rooms. Do not remove that necklace while you are within the city. Does the miko have some way of hiding? Humans are not unwelcome, here in the south, but they do cause comment."

"Kagome has something suitable, and if it isn't, she can, I'm sure, make another."

Kagome nodded. "Yup. No problem at all. If you're done, do you want the ward to be taken down?"

"Yes, if you would. One last thing." Tanuma paused, and stared back at Sesshoumaru intently, still hardly daring to believe his luck at finding the former lord alive and well. There might be a chance, now. They might yet escape a civil war, if things worked out...

As long as Sesshoumaru realized how powerful Damia had become, and took steps to ensure that he wasn't taken by surprise, everything would work. Tanuma had heard only the faintest of rumors concerning the power of the dark miko, added to the ruler of the west. Damia kept that strength hidden, and it was only the careful, time consuming resources of a spymaster that had brought it to his attention He had to tell Sesshoumaru, later. When they went to speak with Tosa. They had to tread carefully. If Sesshoumaru failed... all or nothing. The west would turn against the south.

If they hadn't considered it already...

"Take care. I had almost given up on a way to take Damia out without starting a war. Do not fail, and do not underestimate her. She is much stronger than most know. If you do fall, I fear for what might happen..."

Sesshoumaru allowed himself a grim smile. "I do as well. But I will not fail." What did Tanuma know about Damia's strength...? Was there something he didn't know? He ought to be on nearly even ground with her according to what he knew, and remembered, but if he wasn't... Sesshoumaru had always known he might die, flighting her. How strong...? Sesshoumaru almost asked, but caught himself. Later.

"Good. I will go, and tell Tosa and Satsuma you are coming." With a brief bow, Tanuma turned, and waited for Kagome to take down the barrier.

Kagome swallowed, once, and gingerly reached over to the barrier, after waiting for Sesshoumaru to pull his illusion back into place. When there was no evidence that the taiyoukai had ever been in the room, Kagome lifted the edge of the paper, wincing slightly.

A shock sizzled under her fingers, and she jumped a bit, started. But the movement tore down the barrier, and Tanuma nodded, disappearing into the forest quickly. The late afternoon sun angled across the forest, and Kagome sighed, sucking gingerly on one burnt finger.

"Damn. I hate when it does that. I have no idea why I can't seem to do anything with wards...every time I try..." Kagome muttered, scowling.

Sesshoumaru shook his head, then stiffened, and gestured for silence. "Come, Amiritsu. We have till nightfall to return to the city."

...Amiritsu? What...? Then Kagome stiffened as well, as the sense that someone, or something, was watching them grew. It was a miko, she knew it, though the power seemed distant, as though someone was observing them from many miles away. She nearly rolled her eyes at Sesshoumaru's choice of fake name...did he _have _to pick the same one as the rambling authors friend?

Great; now she felt inadequate to go with the singed fingers...a barely half trained miko, young, though not wholly inexperienced, and terribly inept with barriers, as her burnt hands would attest...she was nothing like the knowing woman in the journal!

Brightly, Kagome nodded, and grinned, glad Tanuma had gone.

Sesshoumaru had picked that name, so he'd have to live with it.

In seconds, Kagome had decided on her new role. Boy, was Sesshoumaru going to regret picking that name...

"Alright! Oh, we have so much shopping to do! I need a new ribbon for my hair, and I'm hu-ungry!!" She whined, hoping Sesshoumaru played along. If he picked a name like that for her, she'd just have to give him one in return...and, in the meantime, he could deal with 'fragile, ditzy Amiritsu.'

"Oh, that reminds me! I heard that there's some person called Tosa around here...but that's the name of a province!! Silly youkai, naming someone after a human province..." Kagome let out a giggle, high pitched and as airheaded as she could possibly manage. Let the watcher chew on that, then! At her best, Kagome could make any air-headed teeny-bopper cry with envy of her complete lack of intelligent conversation. Kagome winced. It felt like she was choking on exclamation points! But if it worked...

She nearly giggled again as she watched Sesshoumaru's eyes widen in surprise, and then as he gave a thoughtful nod. Good, he understood what she was trying to do...

"Silly youkai? I do not think so._ Humans_ named the provinces after important youkai." Sesshoumaru bravely attempted to smile, feeling his face nearly crack as he did so. All well and good for Kagome to chatter away like a pretty doll with not a thought in her head but clothing and food, for the benefit of their watcher, but he could not so readily pretend. He had no idea how to act like that, nor did he really want to! Luckily, Kagome was chatty enough for both of them...

"Really?! Oh, I never knew that! That's so exciting! What else was named after youkai?! Were there really famous ones? You promised to show me everything! Can we get chicken?" Kagome bounced along beside him as he headed towards town, taking a different route than Tanuma had.

Sesshoumaru shook his head. She actually _bounced._ Any moment, he expected her to start jumping from tree to tree like a deranged, caffeine fueled squirrel. She was acting like a little girl. He could not understand how such a huge change could have occurred! Now, Kagome looked like nothing so much as a pretty woman, brought along as an ornament and without any really understanding of what was going on.

Kagome gleefully abandoned any attempt at making her way quietly through the woods, and blundered about like a lady unused to being more than a few feet from the attentive hands of servants. Someone wanted to watch her, did they? Chew on _this!_

She could still feel the watcher on her back, and she was careful not to lay the act on too thick. It felt like whoever it was, was loosing interest ...just a bit more..."Ouch? It stung me! Joseibi... Joseibi-i" Kagome grinned. If Sesshoumaru could have fun with names, so could she!

Sesshoumaru nearly laughed as Kagome thrashed through the bush. He took back everything he had ever thought about her ability to walk quietly in a forest – that might have been loud enough for an inu youkai to hear pretty well, but this...! It was like someone had set up a pair of drums in the forest, and was banging them together for the hell of it!

And that name...was she trying to be funny? Kagome and her warped sense of humor... 'feminine beauty' indeed...

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_Mesau nearly groaned as Tanuma left, forcing her to choose between following him, and tracking the two newcomers. He looked as though he was headed towards the citadel, so Mesau let Tanuma go – for now. There were other watchers in the capitol. Now that the ward was gone, she hopped down closer to the unlikely pair, grimacing as she heard the chatter of the girl._

_Mesau took one look at the vacant stare, and winced at the way the idiot woman tripped over the most ridiculous things. The youkai beside her looked distinctly ruffed, and put upon. Mesau, for once, felt a small amount of sympathy for youkai. How on earth had they ever gotten together? The girl was pretty, she'd admit to that, yes, even a little envy. But the mind behind it...! There was nothing! Mesau knew some males preferred beauty without brains, but this was ridiculous!_

_Mesau followed, wondering how on earth the youkai put up with the mindless prattle, and grew disgusted. Chicken? What on earth did chicken have to do with Lord Tosa? (the idiot didn't seem to know he was a lord!) _

_Eventually, Mesau grew bored, and, seeing that the two were headed for the city, where she did not care to follow so openly, she got ready to leave, relinquishing active control of the birds mind, setting it to follow without her guidance. There was a small chance the woman was acting to throw her off, but Mesau doubted that the wench had even heard of the word 'deception.' It was probably too long for the lackwit to comprehend. _

_Paper feathers were told to follow, and report. Mesau pulled herself away from the fabricated crow, and_ felt her mind settle back into her own body, felt the cool breath of air from the window and the cramps in her legs.

She hadn't gotten much, for all the power spent today. But Tosa was up to something, something big. Mesau had to check the markings on that mutt of a soldier, and search for the woman. There was that, at least. If there was a traitor, or a spy, she'd know. Damia would probably be mad she hadn't gotten anything else, but there were limits to what Mesau could do. The crows would follow the pathetic twosome into town, as far as they could, and pass along the description. There were a few operatives she could trust to find out information, where her crows could not go. She would have to depend on them for now.

Mesau stood up and winced, stiff after sitting for so long,and turned away from the window. Damia would want to know, wouldn't she? A soft sigh, and a weary hand brushed back her hair. The things she did to save Japan from the far west...

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_Apologies for this being a little late, once again. And after all those lovely reviews, too!(feels slightly bad) Thanks so much, guys! Guess the only thing in my defense is general busyness of relatives coming to stay...lol. _

_Again, this chapter is unbeta'd as well. I'm not sure how that part will work, actually. I seem to be able to write much faster than she can edit for the time being..._

_lol. This seems to be a day of updates – First a site overhaul gets started, now this goes up. Anyway, hope you all had good holidays, and wish you well in the new year. Adieu, until next update!_

_Don't forget to review! (grin)_


	26. ch25:Room and Board

Unbeta'd

**:: Room and Board ::**

Kagome laughed silently as the door opened, and they were escorted…or at least, Sesshoumaru was being escorted; she was currently playing 'unseen miko'…and they entered the citadel of the South. On the outside, it looked rather imposing, she supposed – a beautifully laid out building, combining form and function into a cohesive whole. Rock gardens, gravel and carefully situated shrubs created beauty, but out of the corner of her eyes, Kagome could see the guards unobtrusively flitting around like shadows.

And, she belatedly realized, there was no_ way_ one could sneak up on the walls – the gravel crunched loudly under even the silent feet of Sesshoumaru, though luckily _she_ wasn't giving herself away. The necklace covered her footsteps, it appeared. Beautiful this place might be, but it was also deadly. Even her inexperienced eyes could pick out the hidden defenses of the villa.

The door they had come in was a delivery gate, so it wasn't very fancy. Servants were the ones who used it, after all, and those whose business was unobtrusive. But once they were inside…

"I was told there were_ two_ people who were to be delivering this afternoon?" The youkai guiding them through the maze of back halls said neutrally.

"And so there are." Sesshoumaru replied, just as neutrally. He gave a slight smile, and the man leading the way simply shrugged. He didn't know who came in by the blue door, save that they had business with Tanuma, or the masters. He was paid not to ask too many questions, after all. A lot of money, and loyalty, could buy a _lot_ of non-questions.

Sesshoumaru knew Kagome was still here, though. She'd suggested holding onto him so he knew where she was. He could feel, numbly but still enough to know it was her, loosely holding onto the end of his tail. Since Sesshoumaru's current disguise did not include a tail, it was invisible as well.

He nearly shook his head at the picture they made. Or not made, really. A servant, leading a Taiyoukai disguised as a mutt rank and file soldier, followed by an invisible tail, followed by an equally invisible miko. The world was stranger than most people knew…

Behind him, Kagome indulged herself, staring unabashedly at _everything_. After all, it wasn't like someone could _see_ her staring, could they? The castle was a fascinating place…she had seen things like it before, of course, but always from behind velvet ropes for visitors, and everything had had a sense of…age. Fragility. Everything _here,_ however, was used often, alive in a way she hadn't seen before.

More corridors. They were close to the small study now, if Sesshoumaru had to make a guess. He remembered this part of the castle from his last visit of state, a few decades ago.

Their guide stopped, and bowed. "Please, wait here. I will inform them you have arrived." He vanished into the room, and Sesshoumaru sighed. Them must mean Satsuma, Tosa, and Tanuma. It was getting late, and he _hoped _Tosa did not want a long discussion. Sesshoumaru just wanted to head off and sleep, the long journey starting to take its toll. Kagome had had a chance to rest on the way here, at night, while he flew them onwards – nowhere in there had he had a chance to rest.

All too soon, the servant returned and led them into the room, before bowing and leaving, pulling the thick door closed behind him. Conversations in this room wouldn't leave that way - no eavesdropper would ever be able to hear.

Sesshoumaru glanced across the dim light, and into the shadows of the desk, facing the door.

"Sesshoumaru! Is that you?" A familiar voice called out. Movement behind the desk resolved into a taller figure of a man, dark purple hair and brilliant green eyes wide, a cheerful smile on Tosa's face. The dragon youkai walked over, every step seeming to speak of boundless energy. Behind him, sitting down, was Satsuma. Tanuma did not appear to be present.

"Indeed it is, Tosa." Sesshoumaru turned his head, and bowed his head briefly to the rulers of the South.

"And with such a powerful disguises ...even our own kitsune spy couldn't see it was an illusion." Satsuma smiled, in welcome, before rising, undulating from the couch, red hair tied back in an elegant array, held in place with a comb. "Why don't you take it off? Tanuma has ensured this room is as safe as we can make it. And I would like to see _you _again, not a foot-soldier in the western army."

"I thought you were coming with a friend, Sesshoumaru?" Tosa grinned. "A _lady _friend, eh? Thought we'd never convince you of the pleasures in life! A beautiful woman, sake..." He grinned wider, and laughed at the frosty look. "Oh, glare all you like! Maybe I'll finally convert...er..._convince_ you one day. Do sit down."

Sesshoumaru pulled off the necklace, assured that nobody would walk in, but did not sit. "It is good to see you too, though one could wish for a happier meeting. Kagome, show yourself."

Satsuma blinked. That names was familiar…but where could the woman possibly be hiding? "Kagome? I don't...oh. Now _that _is a clever trick."

Kagome reappeared, and bowed deeply to their hosts. "Hi! Sorry, but I didn't want to be seen going in, and I didn't know when to take it off...it's kinda awkward..."

Satsuma laughed lightly. "Ah, yes. A very handy trick, that. I did not know miko were so accomplished in illusions."

Kagome reddened. "Er...that's about all I can do, really. I got the idea from my brother, and wanted to see if it would work…"

Tosa grinned wider. "Invisible, eh? You don't want to sell it, do you? It would make sneaking down to the kitchens so much easier at midnight..."

"Um...it doesn't actually make you invisible..." Kagome winced slightly. Sneaking down to the _kitchens_? _Him_? Wasn't this _Lord _Tosa? Lord being the key word there? She eyed the dark purple, almost black, head of hair, and the beaming face underneath.

Well, maybe...she could certainly imagine him sneaking food at midnight. But it just seemed so...Tosa was nothing like she'd thought a lord would be like. She realized she'd been expecting someone a bit like Sesshoumaru... Tosa, Satsuma… Neither of them was what she'd been expecting. She thought Satsuma was a kitsune, like Tanuma, but she wasn't sure.

"Interesting." Satsuma looked closely at the necklace in Kagome's hand, and smiled. "May I see that?"

"So you can sneak off to the kitchens as well?" Tosa grinned at his mate, laughing. "_You_ don't need a necklace for that, kitsune, just me!"

Sesshoumaru was tempted to roll his eyes. The irrepressible lord, always thinking with his stomach... "Perhaps. Did you wish to speak of matters tonight, or tomorrow?" Hopefully, tomorrow...

"Tomorrow, I think." Tosa sobered immediately. "I had hoped...when Tanuma said you were alive, earlier, I almost didn't believe it. Damia... her foreign policy leaves _much_ to be desired, I'm afraid. She's even more intolerant of humans than you were, if such could be believed, and this meddling in the other domains..." Tosa made a face, and shook his head.

Kagome, standing to one side, listened to the conversation flowing around her head, half in a daze. All these names...! This was a side of youkai she had never seen before, and it was more than a little confusing. All these high up and powerful people she was somehow talking to, and they all thought she was a powerful miko...Kagome was tempted to laugh hysterically. No _way _was she a powerful miko! Maybe, _maybe_ one day, but not right now! She just hoped she didn't make a fool out of herself, doing something stupid, or accidentally offending someone, or...just because she was human, some people...some youkai... might not like her...!

Satsuma nodded, also sober now. "There is much to talk on, tomorrow, with both of you. Tanuma said you wished to invoke the right of blood, and challenge her, if we but got you as far as the council. It is a good plan, but I am not sure you realize how powerful she has become..."

The lady of the south shook her head, and then smiled. "But come, you must be tired. We don't need to discuss such weighty matters today. I asked Okitsuga to prepare a room for guests, though nobody knows who for besides the three of us."

Tosa nodded. "Just Tanuma, Satsuma, and myself. You heard we had to let Matsudaria go, didn't you? I didn't want anyone else to know, and she was starting to think of passing information to the west. Present company excepted, of course." A quick grin flashed, and was gone.

Sesshoumaru nodded. "I heard. I understand. I will be wearing this while I am here the whole time, to make sure nobody sees and passes information west." Sesshoumaru's fingers briefly stroked the cool stone beads. "Kagome? What about you?"

Kagome smiled weakly, jumpy at being called upon. Sesshoumaru was actually asking her opinion…? Wow. She'd never thought she'd have seen the day. She took a breath as three intense pairs of youkai eyes turned to stare at her. Why did the floor never swallow you when you wanted it to...?.

"Nobody knows who I am." She said slowly, thinking it out. Did she want to stay hidden for most of the time, or not? What was better?

"I'm not dressed as a miko. A human would cause comment, if not outright dislike, so I'm just going to stay out of the way for most of the time, I think... But I don't think I need to hide, the way he does." She glanced back at Sesshoumaru, and laughed. "Although you might as well call me 'Amiritsu' while I'm here, not Kagome. And if I act a little ditzy, well, we had to dodge a spy on the way here. It wasn't the _best _idea as a cover, but I think I'm stuck with it by now..." Kagome made a face, wishing she had thought of something better. 'Amiritsu' was starting to get on her nerves.

Tosa laughed, amusement shining through the rich voice. "Ditzy? And I assure you, the south is more tolerant than you give us credit for. Satsuma and I realized long ago that humans were not totally worthless, and we have tried to persuade others." An ironic laugh, and an indulgent smile broke though. "The fellowship has its roots here, you know, with some of the more philosophical of the nobles. Did you really think people willing to trade with humans would believe they were as inferior as all that?"

He paused, and grinned. "I don't think _everything_ our more philosophical nobles preach is a good idea, particularly that one about paving the roads in ice in the winter so we could skate to work... but the basic idea has merit. It's older than the fellowship, to boot."

Satsuma smiled sadly. "I know most of Japan's youkai view humanity as a nuisance at best, food at worst, but there are a few of us who don't think that way. I hope you are not prejudiced, my lady miko...?"

"No! It's just... Usually I hear the other side of things. 'Die, human scum!' and all that. So this is a pleasant surprise." Kagome smiled. "I _knew_ there had to be someone, somewhere, who saw things that way!" She grinned broadly. Kagome had always hoped to meet more youkai who weren't so, well…bias…towards humans. Sesshoumaru was a prime example of what a lot of youkai seemed to think.

What about hanyou…? Briefly, she wondered if Inuyasha had ever come south. They hadn't ventured very far south while hunting for jewel shards. He might have liked it more here, she realized, if they had ever come. If more people had shared _this_ point of view...

Kagome couldn't help but regret not coming before. Some place that would have accepted him…he'd never really said, but she knew how much Inuyasha had been hurt by intolerance.

Tosa laughed, hard. "Oh yes. The 'southern traitors' to youkai-kind, they call us...but I truly do think this is what we need, to survive. If there is a way to do it without fighting… Tolerance and entrepreneurship…"

He gave Sesshoumaru a searching look. "Contrary to what _some_ think, being born human – or hanyou! – does not demean ones value." It was too bad Sesshoumaru had never really agreed with him and Satsuma on this; Sesshoumaru's father, Inutashio, had been one to value a human life. Tosa had had great hopes for Sesshoumaru being as wise. After all, he had a human stepmother, and a hanyou half brother...

But no, Sesshoumaru had chosen not see, and South and the West, once very close, had become distant since then. Tosa liked Sesshoumaru well enough, and they got along well in everything else, but relations regarding the newcomers, and humans in general, had been hard. Even Rin had not changed him enough to let them see eye to eye on that. Tosa was too much a southern radical, and Sesshoumaru was too much the frost king.

Satsuma thought the same thing as he did. Tosa couldn't help but wonder if the miko in front of them might help to change the former lord of the west's mind. Maybe, if Rin had lived... Tosa ha never met her, but he mourned the loss of someone who could have helped change Sesshoumaru around.

He'd nearly laughed himself sick when he'd first heard the improbable rumors of Sesshoumaru running off with a human lover, before sobering up to the situation, but...

Ah well. What would come, would come. The dragon of the south would be ready. Tosa straightened, and smiled, a slight gleam in his eyes. "Now. That is enough for tonight. Put that most excellent disguise back on, both of you, and I will call for someone to bring you to your room."

Room? Didn't he mean room_**s**,_ as in plural? Kagome frowned slightly. She had a bad feeling about this…

A mischievous grin appeared on the dragon lord face. "I trust you don't object to sharing a room? Seeing as the soldier - does he have a name? - _did _arrive with his...'ditzy lover Amiritsu'… according to Tanuma." The grin on his face widened.

Sesshoumaru scowled, replacing the disguise. Share a room? What…? Tosa couldn't be _serious_, could he…? Tanuma and his infuriating need to know everything... and then he'd told Tosa...!

"That isn't funny, Tosa. I know _you _think the greatest pleasures in life are sake and women, specifically Satsuma, but not everyone shares your opinion." That was Tosa's one major fault: Always going on about sake, and Satsuma...

"Of course not!" Tosa looped an arm around his ladies waist, and shared a quick kiss with his laughing mate. "If they _all_ liked 'Tsuma here, I'd have to beat them with a stick!"

Kagome's face fell. Oh dear...

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Damia looked across the massive desk, neatly covered in stacks of paper, and suppressed a grimace. So much paper… But that was not important right now. The person standing beyond the large desk, looking slightly chastened (but not nearly enough!) was.

She'd agreed that Mesau should use their combined power, given by the bond, to spy. Damia did not often think it was important enough to do so, but this once, Mesau had persuaded her to pass control to her.

Normally Damia wouldn't dream of doing that. _Damia_ was the one who gave orders. But in the interests of personal gain, she'd agreed... And Mesau had failed. Human incompetence, which she should have expected. A barrier had kept her miko lackey away, and a fear of entering the city personally. Mesau was fairly good at concealing her emotions, Damia reflected, but she was nowhere near as good as one trained for decades in the subtle nuance of expression at the castle of the West. Mesau was angry with herself for loosing the trail. Good. But it was her own fault, after all…

Cautious, cautious human spider. Too cautious. Damia knew Mesau very well. She had to; it was her job to know her underlings, distasteful humans or not. That was the reason Sesshoumaru had bitten the dust in the first place. He forgot to watch _her_, instead running off with that human girl to travel around, fixated on Naraku...even with something like the Shikon at stake, it wasn't a good excuse. She wanted the jewel too, if she could get it, but she hadn't run off after it, had she?

Damia had waited for others to find it, and while Naraku had been somewhat worrisome – a powerful youkai, without the responsibility that came with it, was a dangerous being, and Naraku had let everything go straight to his head from all accounts – she had been content to wait for the jewel to be completed, before waiting for the dust to settle and taking it. She had Mesau's power to draw on, after all, and had some plans for getting a few more miko on her side if the Shikon was not to be found. The Shikon would be a powerful thing to have, but she didn't think she'd uncover it anytime soon. That miko who'd completed it and defeated Naraku had taken it and disappeared.

Damia regretted that, a bit. Think what she could have done with such a miko securely bound to her power, and the Shikon as well…! She couldn't understand why Sesshoumaru had denied wanting the Shikon. Pride was only worth so much, after all. Damia was practical enough to realize allies were useful. Sesshoumaru… he hadn't wanted it at all, not even to deny it to others…

Idiot.

Sentimental idiot. Allowing the human whelp to tag behind him had made him soft. Sesshoumaru never let himself slip into emotional states, never got worked up. Never chose t see what was happening right under his nose. Never provided an opening...

She supposed she should thank the combined efforts of Naraku and ...what was her name? Ren? Rin? For allowing her the opportunity she'd been waiting for for years. She couldn't allow the state of affairs in the West to continue; just last week she'd had a report of two humans, armed with the new guns, killing two hermits north of the castle. Sesshoumaru wouldn't deal with it, so she would! She couldn't believe things had gotten so bad... but with her help, surly they could unite and drive away the invaders, become strong again!

Just as soon as she got this stupid miko off her back...

"Enough." She snapped. "I heard you the first time. Tosa is up to something; I already knew that. He's always up to something, toadying after the far west. He's more concerned with the exotic Dutch and Europeans than what is happening to us. So you've found a traitor, or a spy; dealt with it! I trust you remember the markings on him? Look them up. Make a report. You know how to write. Unless you have something of use to tell me, something _worth_ all the trouble I went to, you are wasting my time."

Damia punctuated the retort with a frosty glare. Put the human in her place. Mesau was getting ideas above her station. She was useful, but not indispensable, not by any means! Damia could always get another priest or priestess to work for her, to add their spiritual power to her own youkai strength, even without something like the jewel. She was seriously considering doing that already, adding another few humans to her little 'collection...' Just so the fact Mesau was _not_ invaluable became clear. And to help Damia, of course. She never did anything without several reasons for it. Humans could be so useful... pity the one miko and the jewel were beyond reach….

Especially now that Sesshoumaru was free. Damia knew she would need all the edges over him she could get, and then some, to make sure of the outcome of any meeting between them. He was _not_ going to be happy with her. She'd damaged his pride, and tried to destroy him. Not kill, which was a different matter – **destroy**. She'd wanted to make _sure _that if he ever resurfaced, he would be beyond reason, and beyond being a threat. Damia fervently hoped she'd succeeded. She didn't want to know what would happen if he was strong enough to come after her, with only one thought in mind...

Mesau added power Damia would not otherwise have, but if Sesshoumaru had been freed by a miko, or a priest…he might have done the same as she had. Unlikely, true, but the possibility was there, that he had been broken by her doing enough to abandon pride. Which meant Damia needed another human battery. She made a mental note to go looking for someone suitable. There had been that village not too far east, with a few likely candidates…

Mesau's lips thinned, but she said nothing. She knew who was in charge. She was free to leave at any time, of course, if she did not like the management, but since the definition of 'free to go' generally included 'free to go anywhere now that we've tossed you off the wall and liberated you of cumbersome limbs,' it had never been a problem for Damia.

"Very well. I will go see what else I can find." Mesau's lips went, if possible, even thinner, making her coarse face even plainer. Damia gave a mental cheer as her least favorite minion turned and left, and then got back to the more important business of reading reports, and deciding how best to go about acquiring a few new batteries…

She knew, if Sesshoumaru was free (likely, since the statue was gone; why dig something up and then leave it there? Although she hadn't yet heard anything about him…) that his first thought would be to kill her. She _wasn't_ sure if he'd be thinking clearly or not, or if he was weakened, but she took no chances. Mesau had told her there was a good possibility his mind had been working when the spell backfired, that he'd been watching them from behind stone eyes. She'd decided to destroy him, then, instead of kill. Almost as good.

Maybe that was the point at which she'd started looking for other miko, Damia mused. Mesau wasn't as useful as she'd thought. She'd been sure she could kill the western lord, but... Mesau just wasn't strong enough, even though she, at least, was willing and wanted to see Damia's cause succeed. Funny human…

But regardless, if a homicidal, deranged Sesshoumaru came after her for locking him away in his worst nightmare, for killing the human whelp, she'd be more than ready for whatever strength even madness lent him…

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Kagome, visible, for now, stared at the room. She hadn't bothered replacing her own necklace after they had said goodnight to Tosa and Satsuma, the lord barely containing his amusement at Sesshoumaru's clear discomfort – Tosa hadn't really paid much attention to her, aside from a wink on the sly. Kagome wasn't sure what to think of him, now…he reminded her a bit of Miroku, but only slightly. Usually the monk had more sense…but then again, she had seen the small smile on Satsuma's face, so perhaps…bah. Too tired to think straight!

The room, at first glance, was nice enough, except for the fact that it was clearly intended for one occupant, with perhaps a servant. There was only one bed, and bathroom. Kagome skittered away from those thoughts, and concentrated on the rest of the room. A more thorough look lent a slightly dust quality to the air, hardly visible unless looked for. Satsuma had said it had had to be brought out of storage, so to speak… that was probably why it seemed dusty, closed in and silent.

Kagome watched Sesshoumaru playing the role of 'Joseibi, the mutt of the west,' from the corner of her eye. He seemed lost in thought, and she let him be, electing to explore the room instead. It put the question of sleeping arrangements off that much longer…stupid Tosa…all that talk about tolerance, and he didn't even ask a by-your-leave…!

She wandered over to the small bathroom off the main chamber, poking her nose into everything, in part to put off the dreaded conversation about sleeping arrangements, but mostly because she was curious.

Sesshoumaru watched her go, and sighed, glaring slightly at the floor, holding back a sneeze from the dust. Damn Tosa and his warped sense of humor… but, unfortunately, he was right. _Not _right enough to justify putting Sesshoumaru in such close quarters to Kagome, but at least right enough about the role playing that he, as 'Joseibi,' couldn't protest openly.

He opened the window to let in the cool night air, to clear out the slightly musty, closed in feel of the room, then paused, examining the space. They were probably alright to speak in this room openly, since it was a room in this particular wing, the one for Tanuma's 'special' guests, but best ask first.

Kagome had come here pretending to be Amiritsu, and she couldn't go back on that, nor could he. They had spent the entire afternoon trying to shake the watcher, or watcher_s,_ off by pretending, and once in town, had continued to be Joseibi and Amiritsu, mutt soldier and ditsy lover. If he'd _known_ what would happen when Kagome had seized on the most readily available cover story... such an unfortunate choice…!

All the people who'd seen Kagome with him today had seen 'Joseibi' and 'Amiritsu' wandering around, and must have drawn their own conclusions. There were precious few reasons why most youkai kept brainless human women like 'Amiritsu' around, and to try and deny that now, change the story…there would be suspicions raised which he could not afford.

Grudgingly, Sesshoumaru had to admire Tosa's scheming. The other lord had always tried to get him to see his way of thinking, and had, in the process, thrown nearly every trick in the book at him whenever he had come to visit the South. This time, Tosa had him over a barrel.

Sesshoumaru couldn't send Kagome back to Tosa with a terse note explaining that he did _not _appreciate surprises in the form of female servants at midnight in his room, thank you very much, and his excellent nose had always detected the various things the other youkai had insisted on putting in his drinks. Dragon youkai didn't have the finer noses of their Inu cousins, after all.

But all past schemes aside, this particular one seemed to be without a loophole. Sesshoumaru sighed, and glared once more at the floor, and the rice screens. If only...

Well, no point in bemoaning what there was no fixing, for the moment. At least Kagome was tolerable to have around. Sesshoumaru set his shoulders and glanced around the room. There was a smaller chamber for a servant off the main room, thank goodness. Sesshoumaru headed for that, and examined it. This would do nicely. He could sleep in here. Kagome wasn't bad company for a human (Not strictly true – she was some of the best company had had in a while) but he still felt better with a rice screen between them.

Sesshoumaru searched, and found a sleeping yukata laid out, and a rolled futon. At the reminder of sleep, he nearly yawned, remembering how tired he was. He hadn't slept for days at all, and he would need to be on his toes tomorrow, talking with the southern leaders…

Sesshoumaru closed the rice screen behind him, and quickly got dressed, arranging the futon to his liking before glancing back at the door, frowning. He got up and poked his nose outside, just in time to see Kagome returning from her foray into the bathroom.

"K-Amiritsu…I am headed to bed. Goodnight." Kagome glanced back at him in surprise, but he had already pulled the screen shut behind him.

She blinked. That yukata had been open at the front, exposing the lean, toned body beneath…even as Joseibi, he still looked good… Kagome shook her head to clear it, blushing slightly. _What_ had gotten into her?

She shook her head, and thought for a moment. Well, if he was going to bed there, then that must mean she got the main room. "Goodnight!" She called back, and then disappeared into the bathroom again, the small bag at her hip providing her own yukata. Kagome packed away her clothing, making sure to tuck the necklace out of sight, and the ever present Shikon. Presumably, Sesshoumaru had hidden the 'human' string of beads somewhere, and he was wearing the others, so no worries there.

Kagome played briefly with the Shikon on its silver chain, a tiny string of beads wound around it. The beads hid any trace of the power hanging so innocently around her neck, something Kagome had made her first week back, and had then forgotten about in the mad rush of training. Good thing too, or she'd have everyone wondering about it...and a horde of jewel hungry youkai hot on her tail, to boot...

Kagome sighed as she slipped under the covers, the cool fabric warming slightly as she lay there, feeling her limbs melt into the futon as she relaxed enough to sleep…Her mind started to wander. Sesshoumaru was a gentleman, wasn't he? Letting her have the nice, soft covers…must remember to…say…thank you…

Kagome was asleep, her breathing echoing the sleepers in the next room.

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Tosa sighed as he watched Sesshoumaru and Kagome go. He'd tell them what was going on tomorrow, after they had recovered from traveling. He could tell just by looking that both were exhausted from the trip here. Better to wait till they were alert before having a serious discussion.

It was unlikely Sesshoumaru knew everything that was going on. Even Tanuma had only found some things out recently, and Tanuma held it as a personal point of pride that he should know, if not _everything_ that went on, at least most of it. Tosa grinned. Tanuma was downright anal sometimes about this need to know everything...but at least he generally told Tosa the important parts. Or Satsuma.

He'd been absent from their little get together tonight because of some rather distressing news that had come to his attention. Tosa grimaced slightly, before turning towards his mate. Was there no _good_ news anymore, in this world…?

"You look troubled, dear." Satsuma noted, frowning slightly.

Tosa gave her a smile. "You know me too well, don't you? I was thinking about Tanuma, and this latest rumor from the west he wanted to check out."

Satsuma shook her head, sighing. "I know. Troubles abound, and they all seem to come from there, these days. Even the stew brewing in the north came from there, originally." She shook her head, and sighed. "We cannot do much to help, either…"

That was the most frustrating thing, Satsuma realized. They couldn't do much to counter the West, and Damia, other than continue trying to convince the lord of the East to side with them. The North was a complete write-off.

Damia was preparing for war, she knew. If they did not stand down, there would be fighting soon; but yet they couldn't back down, not in all consciousness, ad she doubted Damia would. Satsuma knew the only reason there wasn't more fighting _now_ was that fact that most youkai didn't _want_ a war and were very reluctant to begin one. It was only their stance – hers and Tosa's - on the matter that was preventing youkai from driving off the new, pale foreigners, and then turning on the Japanese humans. If they did, they'd face the wrath of the south.

It had been a long time since the last great war – centuries. The last time…the last time there had been a major conflict had been when Lord Tosa's father, Ryuukotsusei, chose to take on the then lord of the west, Inutashio, and failed.

Tosa had always been on friendly terms with the lord of the West, back then; they had many similar views on the world, after all. Inutashio and Tosa had been quite close. Tosa had even gone to the human wedding Izayoi had insisted on. Unfortunately, Tosa's father, (the previous Lord of the south, Ryuukotsusei) had not shared his sons opinion, and had gone after Inutashio for bringing his human with him on a visit of state shortly after.

Inutashio had not been attacked while in close proximity to Buzen, but after he had left, the great dragon lord of the south had gone and attacked, wounding him and becoming sealed into the bargain.

Inutashio was easy prey for humans, then – he had died. Tosa had succeeded his father, and thankfully, Sesshoumaru had never held anything against him because of past history. The fighting hadn't been too bad, and had died down after a few years once both young lords established firm control of their domains. It was nothing like what this storm threatened to hold...

Perhaps that was why Sesshoumaru did not like humans that much, Tosa mused. One had brought his father to his death, in a way, and another had done for his brother in much the same manner.

But then Tosa smiled. Rin had changed him, though. Sesshoumaru seemed a little more mellow, though perhaps that was only the temporary result of the current circumstances. Or perhaps…Kagome had had more of an effect than Sesshoumaru knew. Where had he heard that name before, connected with the dog clan…?

Satsuma smiled, and sat down next to Tosa, startling him. He had been so lost in thought… "Thinking deep thoughts, perhaps? Don't try too hard, now. You might damage something you'll need for tomorrow."

"Not really. Remembering. That girl, Kagome…that name seems familiar."

"It _ought_ to. She's the miko who used to travel with Inuyasha, or so I've heard." Satsuma smiled, amused. Everyone had heard of the doings of that group, by now. Most heard only rumors, suitable for entertainment purposes, but Tanuma had kept careful track of them for her and Tosa at Satsuma's request.

Satsuma wondered where Kagome was from. Somewhere foreign, obviously… briefly, she wondered where the girl had disappeared to for the last year, only to reappear with Sesshoumaru. Gone home, perhaps… All she knew was that Damia had wanted her, or the Shikon at one point. Probably still did, though Damia couldn't have any idea Kagome was with Sesshoumaru. Satsuma wondered how that had ever happened, and if Kagome still had the Shikon. She hadn't sensed anything like it today, even in the same room.

"She disappeared for a year, you know. Tanuma told me Damia was miffed because the Shikon disappeared with her. I wonder where she went? To her home?" Satsuma smiled sadly. Perhaps wherever she'd gone could be looked to for aid? If a miko like her… "Allies, perhaps? If there are more miko of her power running about, I would not hesitate to send an envoy."

"I don't know. I never thought about it. I was more concerned with finding a way to lighten Sesshoumaru up."

Satsuma rolled her eyes. "Indeed. Try to concentrate, dear. Matchmaking is all very well, but we are in the middle of a little problem, right now, and if you managed to offend either of them too much, you'll regret it."

"Yes, dear..."

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_Thanks for all the reviews last chapter, guys! You've all been awesome, sending me reviews (which makes my tiny authors world go round. Lol) Seriously, I think I got the most reviews I've ever,** ever** had for a chapter. Wow. O.o Thank you all so much!! (huge grin)_

… _And more original characters show up in the interest of plot development. There won't be too many beyond the ones already here. Lol. Hopefully, I've done alright, as I know some people don't like other characters thrown in. And we saw a lot of them this chapter…next ch will be fun, though. Promise. And mostly centered on the two main people._

_(I realized I'd have to add some original characters early on, as it's rather hard to create the kind of plot I have going without at least a **few** other characters to populate the place as allies. (grin) And, of course, enemies…so hopefully, even if you don't like my additions, you'll be able to see why I needed to add them)_

_So, let me know what you think. Might be a few mistakes in here I didn't catch – I'm in a bit of a rush and this wasn't beta'd. Hopefully, the next chapter will be up in ...two weeks? Schools started again, and I can already foresee needing to go into the studio this Sunday to catch up…_


	27. Ch26:Joseibi, Mutt of the West

**Unbeta'd**

**:: Joseibi, Mutt of the West ::**

Kagome woke slowly, surprised to find herself in a comfortable futon and not sleeping under a tree, or on Sesshoumaru's puffy cloud thing, before remembering that they had arrived at the southern lords estate, and that she was currently... sharing a room with him. Kagome blinked at the light coming though the window, and sat up slowly.

Sesshoumaru…no, she must remember to call him Joseibi while they were here, right? He was sitting near the window, paying absolutely no attention to her. He was wearing no armor today – only the new clothing she had bought –was it only a month ago? Seemed longer… - for him back home. She supposed he didn't need to wear armor around the house; he never had when he was staying at _her_ home, after all.

The disguise made the clothing appear a little shabbier than it really was, but not too different. He had explained, while they were traveling, the logic behind the dress-up. Apparently he was a soldier of the west. Kagome thought it was rather an ironic choice, but a good one. Nobody paid attention to individual soldiers.

As Kagome moved the covers slowly back, trying to think what time it must be, he turned his head to watch her, face outlined in the low angled light. Kagome froze, not quite sure what to do. "Er…"

"Good morning. Amiritsu." Sesshoumaru nodded his head, a small smile unaccountably in place. Kagome blinked, not quite sure what to make of the words, then shrugged and got up, after first making sure, discreetly, that her yukata was on good and tight, and would not slip open.

Sesshoumaru got up in one fluid movement, and paused at the door to his room. "Food was brought this morning. It's by the door." He turned and walked through the sliding screen to 'his' portion of the suite.

"Thanks!" Kagome grinned, and bounded out of bed, intent on only one thing; food. She was starving! A couple of days on nothing but instant ramen would do that to you, she realized ruefully. And not even properly cooked ramen, either...

On the way by, she snatched at her bag, and started changing into clothes for the day. Ready to face the world, she bent over the breakfast tray and examined it. Seemed a normal enough breakfast; a small bowl of rice, something that looked like natto in another small dish, and several other small bowls with what she thought was seafood, and eggs. But then again, they might not be. Kagome didn't know what youkai ate, especially since Sesshoumaru seemed not to think much of human food, but presumably it was different...

Kagome sat down, and sipped at the tea, idly brushing a few stray strands of hair back behind her ears, before digging in. Another tray, food already gone, sat not too far away. Sesshoumaru must have already eaten, then. Kagome finished up, and then stood. Youkai food was more savory than what the villagers ate, to be sure, but it wasn't _too_ different from what she could get at home. She blinked as a thought occurred to her…

"S-Joseibi?"

Sesshoumaru rematerialized from his room. "Yes?"

"Thanks. For…last night. Er. You know…" Kagome flushed a bit. How to thank him for deciding to take the spare room...? "Er…Do we have to do anything today?"

"Lord Tosa and Lady Satsuma requested my presence after dinner. Otherwise, no." Sesshoumaru frowned as Kagome bent over the tray, intending to pick it up a bit, smoothly ignoring her fluster of earlier. He didn't mind letting her have the room, much. "Leave that – the servants will deal with it."

"Then I want a tour of the castle!" Kagome grinned, eyes shining as she straightened. Servants, eh? Wow…

She had given Sesshoumaru a tour of Tokyo, after all, and though she'd never actually _said_ it, had been wanting to take a look around a youkai castle while _he_ got to play tour guide. She had wanted to see his home, but this would have to do for now. And it wouldn't hurt to know her way around, either.

Sesshoumaru stared at her. Tour...? "I…suppose…it would be good for you to know your way about." He'd been here before, and it wasn't hard to navigate the corridors of the house. The layout wasn't that different than most other youkai fortresses. But Kagome probably hadn't ever been inside a place like this before… and knowing her way around would be a must. Know your exits: a good maxim to live by.

He didn't feel like exploring _all_ of the castle – he had no intentions of going near the part of the palace that had been reserved for visits of state, or the part of the castle his 'dearest' mother had stayed in with him, during the phase of her life she had traveled a lot in, visiting all the major centers, and ending in Aizu.

An overview of the important things would be good. It gave him something to do, to take his mind off what might come out in the meeting later today. Sesshoumaru had a sneaking suspicion that Tanuma knew how powerful Damia really was – and he did not like it.

If Tanuma didn't think he would win…well. That wasn't going to stop Sesshoumaru. He'd known he might die in the attempt before, nothing new...if that was what it took he'd do it...Kagome jolted him out of his thoughts, and he watched as she pulled the cheerful mask over her face, and grinned at him.

"Of course it's a good idea! It's one of mine!" Kagome clapped her hands, and ran to the door, stopping only to pick up her bag and take it with her, a picture of delight. Inside, she was grinning. It was so rare she got a chance to give in to her inner child, these days…

Kagome was going to use that to her advantage, and planned on thoroughly enjoying her duty to act like a brainless child of two. Life had been much too serious, lately – training, more training, and worrying about the shrine, Sesshoumaru, her friends…she was still worried, but it had been pushed to the back of her mind.

Inner immaturity ruled.

Sesshoumaru shook his head, and followed her. It was so hard to figure Kagome out; one moment she was a serious young woman, next minute she could play the fool so well he wouldn't know it was the same clear headed, mature girl who'd taken him into her home and nursed him back to health, the same understanding person who'd had a shoulder to lean on, in the rain…

Sesshoumaru fought back a smile and a laugh as he watched Kagome's erratic progress down the hall. So much like Rin, all that zest for life…

A sad look came into his eyes, but was replaced immediately by determination. Rin had been taken from him far too early. Tenseiga's blade couldn't save the same life twice - not that he'd have gotten there in time anyway. But Kagome…she was a lot like the little girl.

And he was determined to do a better job of protecting her, because he knew, by now, how precious those same qualities he'd seen in Rin were in her…he had often wondered what possessed his younger brother to protect her so fiercely, before. He understood his half-brother a little better, now. Kagome was someone worth protecting.

He hurried to catch up. "That is the wrong way, K-Amiritsu. Unless you wish to do laundry?"

"On a beautiful day like this? Of course not!" Kagome bounded back, and grabbed a hold of his arm, giggling like a schoolgirl. Sesshoumaru's face looked startled for a minute, before he bravely tried to go along with things, inwardly cursing. 'Joseibi' would not shake a 'silly lover' off his arm, would he…?

And as long as he continued to _try_ (try being the key word) to act out of character – Sesshoumaru, ice prince of the west, wandering around with a girl, much less a _human_ girl, hanging off his arm? Unlikely – then he was safe. Awkwardly, Sesshoumaru trotted out his limited ability as an actor, trying not to give into the fluttering of panic in the region of his stomach.

What should he _do_…?!?

Life was so much simpler, way back when all the acting he'd ever needed was a calm, unbreakable mask…!

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A few hours later, Kagome stopped, and looked around at the door, still smiling. Sesshoumaru was certain that that smile hadn't slipped all day.

"I'm hungry. Hey, do you think we could have a picnic lunch out there?" Kagome pointed at the gardens, spread out before them in all their splendor.

Sesshoumaru glanced at the sun, and bravely tried to smile with her. He was getting better at it, he thought. It no longer felt like he was grimacing in pain, at any rate, and thankfully, the anxious feelings that had plagued him all morning were fading. Almost lunch time, so... "Why not? The kitchens are this way."

"Silly Joseibi! I knew that!" Kagome giggled, and turned away from the way she had tried to go, to turn and follow Sesshoumaru back towards the kitchens. She _did _know which way to go, but the more helpless she seemed to be, the better... nobody expected 'Amiritsu' to have secrets, after all.

She was sure it had to be mid afternoon by now, and they still hadn't gone though half the buildings! It was such a large house... Kagome frowned, and briefly wondered what the pace would look like in her own time. Maybe there was a museum here, or a town?

Or... nothing at all?

Surely all this couldn't just ...vanish? Kagome shook her head, and pasted a bright smile on her face. She had read though the rest of that rambling journal while staying with Kaede, and nothing else had been mentioned about history or vanished youkai, only a few more things about different uses of power, and more dry material on proper maintenance of the shrine, rituals, and other things not so useful. Sesshoumaru had been disappointed, but hadn't said anything. Kagome sighed, and glanced sideways at him.

He was playing along surprisingly well, actually. She'd never pegged him as an actor, but he was trying his best to act out of character, and doing not too badly, considering.

Oh, he was still not quite comfortable wearing a grin, and she could only imagine _what_ was going though his head right about now... probably something like 'I'm never going to do this again, I hate acting, and Kagome, you shall die for this insult...' but that was how things went, wasn't it? He couldn't very well act like Sesshoumaru, Taiyoukai of the west, not if he wanted to stay out of sight just a little longer. That streak of arrogance was too distinktive. _She_ didn't want to act like a threat to any watchers either, which was why she had turned necessity into a chance to indulge in some fun.

She just hoped he wasn't too mad about being forced to put up with her as a brainless idiot, and actually having to smile...

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Actually, Sesshoumaru was starting to enjoy himself.

He had always, _always_, been told that the way to present ones self to the world was as a calm, cool headed ruler. He had always been encouraged to learn to hide his feelings, to keep his own council as a lord, to become a mask. That early teaching had stuck with him, and his own logic had supported it later in life. Emotions could be used against you, and sometimes got in the way. He had hidden them deeply. He had always been that way, with very few lapses.

But now... he was free to act as he liked. Because he wasn't Sesshoumaru. He was simply a common soldier, with nothing more urgent on his mind than lunch and a pretty girl on his arm. Tosa would laugh himself sick…

Granted, he was nowhere near as flexible in how he could pretend as Kagome. He wasn't used to doing this, after all, and a single afternoon wasn't going to change things, not even a year of Sundays would. But pretending to be Joseibi... it was like slipping into someone else's shoes, just for a moment. He imagined this was how actors must feel, that while they wore their costumes, they became another person, had the freedom to be anything they liked, and people accepted, even _expected_ that change in personality from them!

It was such an odd idea... but terribly attractive. Sesshoumaru had never really had such freedom, before, and something like _this_... it had opened up the vague thought that perhaps life did _not_ need to be taken quite so seriously after all. Other people seemed to get on fine wearing their hearts openly on their sleeves. Sometimes, it even made them stronger. Like Kagome...

He had watched Rin go through life with not a care in the world, at times, and secretly smiled, happy that she was able to do so, happy to watch her enjoyment of life. He'd been so very surprised, the first time he'd discovered that Rin's own zest for life made him share just a little of it.

That had been _her_ strength, the ability to enjoy life, to trust, to simply be allowed to do as she wanted; a free spirit. Now, watching Kagome do the same thing, feel her enthusiasm as she pretended to be something so different, and to taste it for himself, not merely to watch...

He was enjoying this _quite_ a bit. Not that he was going to say so. Once he took off the beads, he was Sesshoumaru again, and he would have another role to fill. But perhaps... He allowed himself to dream.

Together, they collected a small basket of food from the cooks, who were only too happy to give them a picnic, cooing over the 'young couple in love' (he had almost dropped the basket in shock, while Kagome had let out a nervous laugh and desperately tried to rally something to say to _that_...)

Kagome bounced along beside Sesshoumaru, watching as he carried the basket out towards a tree. They both sat down, and Kagome got out the food, making a passable attempt at serving the dishes in the right way, laughing over her mistakes. Much to her surprise, Sesshoumaru laughed with her once, after she had dropped the rice. It didn't last long, and he hadn't done so again, but it had happened. Kagome smiled again, pleased she could make him laugh, even if he'd looked momentarily shocked to pieces to be doing such a thing.

Today had been fun so far; Kagome smiled wider. She liked spending time with Sesshoumaru, and this would be a rare opportunity to enjoy, and indulge.

Kagome's grin grew mischievous. Madness was catching, wasn't it? Maybe, somewhere under all the layers, Sir Fluffy was actually having a bit of fun on this 'holiday from reality' they were currently enjoying...

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Mesau's tired eyes lit up as she watched the pool of water in the scrying bowl. It had taken her all day, and all night after that fiasco to fold, and send, a special pair of crows south. Keeping the resources she had already in place hot on the trail, following the idiotic Amiritsu and Joseibi though the marketplace, and near the castle, had nearly been too much. Damia had withdrawn her support, after that disastrous failure before, and doing everything on such short notice, so strongly, had left her drained near the limit and desperate enough to resort to blood magic.

That was where she had had to stop before; the castle had defenses against mere simple things like her crows, and she didn't trust the agents inside the walls enough. She had a sneaking suspicion they didn't report everything to her.

But the last pair of minions she had made... _They_ were not simple constructs, but a pair who's eyes and ears were linked far more strongly to her bowl of water, with its thin curl of blood now drifting through the bottom. She'd decided it was time to risk it.

The youkai and the human Amiritsu were the key, she knew. The human might only be along as a plaything, but the youkai... someone Tanuma would want to see personally, dressed in the colors of the west... there was something there for sure. It had cost her greatly to make not one, but two, blood sealed things, but it had been worth it for the speed of information. And security. One day, she would pay dearly, but for now….it was worth it.

Damia's show of indifference yesterday had highlighted Mesau's position as dispensable, and she _already_ knew her position was precarious. Sometimes, she wasn't sure if her agents reported everything they learned to her. Crows never lied, which was why she liked them even though they weren't the answer to everything. A barrier kept the simplest constructs out easily.

Mesau knew her mistress had thought of getting more priests and priestesses in, binding them to her unwillingly. At least _she_ had chosen this path for herself. What Damia planned now was wrong. But... she couldn't do much. She only held as much power s Damia was willing to give her; anything else was pretty much useless.

There was always power in blood, Mesau thought ruefully, fingering the long scar on her arm, the mark sealing her to Damia. Blood could be used for benevolent purposes as well as bad, though each action carried it's own price. Blood figured largely in a lot of the curses and dark spells a miko could weave, but it also lent its strength to some of the most powerful healing and purifying magic. It was all in your _intentions, _and in your ability to accept the payment due.

Mesau knew what a dark miko was, and knew she was _not_ such a thing, despite having joined forces with youkai. She knew what people thought about her, whispering when they thought no ears could hear. Dark miko…those were people who did not care who they hurt, actually _wanted_ to hurt the world. They pursued personal gain without a thought for others. They used their power for profit, for money, for revenge. She did not.

Mesau tried to spare lives where she could, in her quest for the greater good. She wanted to save, to _heal_. She had never cursed anyone. She was trying to save her people, not harm them. It was all in the intentions. And hers, she was sure, were good ones. She was trying to save Japan from the barbarian invaders, from the tangled mess of opium smoke on the continent that was to come, from the corruption and stagnation that had opened the way. She had seen the future, long ago, a world of fog and westerners, bringing guns and forcing Japan's proud people to sign away their lives. She saw a nation much like Imperial China would eventually become…

Blood would give her eyes the strength needed to bridge the long distance south, and the ability to enter the castle grounds. At last, the pair had come within reach! She eagerly leaned forwards, exhaustion forgotten, introspective doubts and worries laid aside in favor of complete concentration.

The first crow hopped forwards under her direction, until it rested in the tree overhead, her pure priestesses power hidden from the youkai below. The youkai's laugh echoed up from the depths of the bowl, sounds thin and faint with distance, but there.

"Oh, they packed us ohagi! I love ohagi!" The human woman's voice broke through, slightly higher and thinner, giggling in an irritating way.

"Oh, it's good. You have to try some, Joseibi!" Mesau watched the woman place the ohagi in her companions hand. She tapped her finger against her lips. Something ticked the edge of her mind, something familiar about the word _hand_... but the blasted girl giggled again, and the feeling was lost. Mesau grimaced. Oh, that annoying sound...

"I am sure it is excellent. Lord Tosa has some talented cooks, I think." A faint smile, and the youkai named Joseibi sampled the food.

"There, wasn't this a nice idea, coming out here? The sun is so nice today!" The woman flopped unceremoniously back against the tree, jarring the bird's eye view slightly. Clearly, the woman could not be of noble decent, if _this_ was how she acted... She must be of peasant stock. Mesau frowned. That meant she could be practically anyone. At least if she'd been a noble Mesau could have looked for her family, tried to see who she was... she hadn't had much success finding the mutt soldier yet, but now, at least, there was a name to search for: Joseibi. He'd be found within days, if the record of a soldier with those markings and name existed.

The woman stared upwards, and grinned as she looked at the bird. Mesau's insides squirmed; it looked like the woman's beautifully clear eyes had pierced her soul, though she knew Amiritsu couldn't possibly know the true nature of the crow, didn't know it was Mesau watching her.

"Oh, look, a birdie!" Another annoyingly giggle, and the illusion shattered. "He looks like he's watching us. I bet he wants some ohagi too!"

Mesau let out a breath. Damn woman. She lifted her crow out of the way, and set it down in the next tree over. She had tried to shield this more powerful bird from youkai, but she wasn't sure it would stand up to inspection if she let the fools closer. And there was certainly nothing against people simply _seeing_ it in place... She nudged the second bird into a better position, carefully hidden on the opposite tree, and sat back with a tired sigh.

"Oh, I scared it!" The sounds were fainter now, but at least she hadn't lost the conversation entirely. Mesau breathed a small sigh of exhausted relief, and kept listening, cursing the woman.

Perhaps she would actually give into temptation and cast a curse over someone, for the first time ever…

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Kagome let out a mental sigh of relief as the crow left. Sesshoumaru hadn't given any indication that he'd noticed it, and she'd tried to do _something_, but...

That crow...it had been a shikikami of some sort, she would bet her life on it. At the least it was something else made by a miko to be a pair of eyes and ears. And she was willing to bet it was here to spy on them. Why else would it come to an empty garden and choose to sit in the tree right above them? Kagome surreptitiously kept her eyes out for more crows, and spotted another, not too far away. They were still being watched. The first one hadn't gone far either.

But, unless she gave herself away and said something, she could do nothing about the feathery big brother. Except pull out the 'super annoyingly, bound to drive your family insane, and your friends too, brainless giggle.' Let the sneaking tom chew on that one!

Kagome pulled the last piece of ohagi towards her, pouting slightly about the vanished bird. "I thought it would like something to eat!"

"Perhaps. Perhaps not." Sesshoumaru laid back, relaxed. "This was a nice idea. The gardens here are beautiful."

Kagome was impressed. Sesshoumaru had actually managed to sound somewhat like he had never seen anything like the beautifully laid out garden before in his life, the 'country youkai in the big city' all over. Wow. Who'd have known he had it in him?

"Yeah. I think I saw a koi pond back there somewhere. Can we go see it?"

"Of course."

"Then lets go! As soon as I pack up here..." Kagome hurriedly put everything away in the basket and then handed it over to Sesshoumaru to carry. She had her own pack to worry about, after all. She wanted to go back inside. She hoped the crows wouldn't follow them there. She'd have to see...

Kagome made the appropriate noises and words of approval when they reached the koi pond, and then smiled when the wind picked up. Complaining loudly of cold, she led them back inside. She didn't know if Sesshoumaru had sensed the birds watching them or not, but she couldn't ask, or even hint about it, till she knew they were safe to do so.

Somehow, it wasn't all fun and games anymore...

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Mesau was growing frustrated. They weren't talking about anything important out here. It was obvious to her now that the woman couldn't be anything more than amusement for Joseibi, though she couldn't fathom _how_ he put up with the inane giggling. Amiritsu was a beauty, _more_ than a beauty, yes, but even so...!

Regretfully, she sat back, even more tired than before. There was still something nagging her about the youkai, something she was _sure_ she'd seen before, but she dismissed it, too tired to really focus. She needed sleep, and then, after that, she could check the records of the army. He should be from the northern base, probably, with those markings, but just to be sure she'd check the entire record collection. Between a thousand and seven hundred entries to read though... kami…. and what _was_ it that kept nagging at her about him? So tired...

She told the first crow to search around for whichever room the guests had been put in – hopefully it had a window to listen at – and then set the other to follow the two if they came outside again. If Joseibi reappeared without Amiritsu...then an alarm would wake her. Maybe then she might hear something of use...!

In the meantime...

Mesau managed to aim enough that when she fell across her futon in an exhausted heap, she didn't disturb the stacks of papers nearby.

111111111111

Kagome sighed as they reached the safety of the house, and felt the crows leave. She glanced up and down the hallways, and grinned.

"Oh! I have a secret for you, Joseibi!" Kagome leaned up on tiptoe, trying to reach Sesshoumaru's ears, barely breathing the words "Is anyone close enough to hear?"

"No." Sesshoumaru inclined his head slightly, speaking softly and keeping an eye out of anyone in the spacious room they were in. "Not that I can see, or sense."

Kagome smiled swiftly, whispering again: "Good. I know how Mesau is watching us. Those crows in the garden...did you feel them? She was watching us with their eyes. I don't think it could be anyone but her."

Sesshoumaru blinked. He had felt nothing. Mesau must be getting better, more subtle, or perhaps that was Damia helping her out... "I didn't know. She must have shielded them somehow, but not from a miko, I see, if you caught them. I wondered why you seemed..."

"To be twice as annoying?" Kagome finished quietly, letting out a soft laugh. "It drives my friends crazy when I do that. I figured she deserved it. I'll do that if she shows up again. I -" She paused, as Sesshoumaru shook his head sharply.

"Amiritsu... it is nearly dinner time. I should head back towards our room, and clean up. I have things to do afterwards."

A few moments later, a pair of servants weighted down with laundry scurried past. Kagome smiled, and grinned yet again. Suddenly, the feeling of fun and games had vanished completely, and the smile no longer reached her eyes. Everyone, _anyone,_ could be watching them. Was this what it felt like, all the time, when you were a lord? Constantly under a microscope? Kagome never wanted to know. And it had all started out so _nicely_, too... "Alright. I want to make myself at home in our room anyway. You go on ahead."

She meant by 'make yourself at home,' to make sure that the room was as secure as she could make it. Kagome thought of the few ofuda's Miroku had given her, hidden in the pack, and of her own small skill with them now. Those might keep the crows out. She hoped so, at any rate...

She didn't intend to go with Sesshoumaru to talk with Tosa. She would probably only get in the way, with all the youkai high muckety mucks there. Kagome planned on staying in the room while Sesshoumaru went to talk. Besides, apart from that, 'Amiritsu' probably wouldn't be invited to a council of war...

Sesshoumaru nodded, and led them back towards the rooms, after dropping the demolished picnic in the kitchens.

11111111111111111

Dinner was eaten, and Sesshoumaru left the room without a word. Tosa had left word that he was to come to the study again. He quickly found his way though the rabbits warren of corridors (perhaps the architect had some usagi youkai in him?) and was admitted to the room. Tosa, Satsuma and Tanuma awaited him.

Sesshoumaru took off the necklace for the conference, and sat down, while Satsuma frowned at him.

"Where is Kagome? I had hoped for her input on certain matters…" She had meant to bring up the fact that Damia had far more in the way of spiritual powers on her side than Sesshoumaru, with the prospect of gaining more soon. Their 'side' only had Kagome.

That had been the rumor Tanuma had worried over last night – Damia's sudden interest in wandering miko. He'd suspected it for some time, but now he'd actually found the village she'd been eyeing…which meant it wasn't just rumor. Damn.

Tanuma frowned slightly as well. "I have some news she might be interested to hear."

"And I wanted to ask if she slept well last night!" Tosa muttered. Sesshoumaru fixed him with a frosty glare.

"_What _was that, Tosa?"

"Nothing." Tosa grinned. "So why isn't she here?"

"Kagome felt that her efforts would be better spent putting up her own protection on the room. And that Amiritsu might look suspicious coming here. I was fairly sure it was one of the secure ones, but I wanted to ask."

Sesshoumaru frowned a bit. He suspected the real reason Kagome hadn't come was that she felt overwhelmed. Though why someone of her talent…

Sesshoumaru stopped, and mentally smacked himself. He'd spent the past month dissuading her from coming on this trip, or from offering help. Now that he'd actually _accepted_ her offer of aid, all those comments about her training and skills not being good enough for the job were coming back to haunt him…

Damn. He'd managed to bring that firmly one on himself. Sesshoumaru frowned slightly, mood soured.

"I see. Perhaps, in a bit, I will wander that way to 'check on our guest.' It is my duty, after all, to see to the household." Satsuma's eyes were twinkling.

Tosa laughed. He knew Satsuma hadn't ever been the domestic sort, but every now and again she indulged in it. When it was convenient to spent time away from the war chamber, at least.

Tanuma nodded thoughtfully. "Perhaps that would be best. Satsuma, please tell her what I told you about what Damia is up to now, would you?"

"Up to?" Sesshoumaru's ears picked up, and he leaned forwards in his seat. "I know I tried to find out what I could, but if there is something…"

"I doubt you know, Sesshoumaru. Tell him, Tanuma." Tosa closed his eyes and sighed, his eyes suddenly tired.

"You told me before you wanted a formal duel, Sesshoumaru. It is a good idea. It becomes a family matter, and politics won't come back and bite anyone later, not like if we'd successfully assassinated her. It neatly avoids any fighting." Tanuma frowned. "But it _isn't _a good idea when you don't know what she has got up her sleeves."

"I don't care what she's got in the way of tricks. I want her dead, by my hand!" Sesshoumaru's voice darkened as he spoke, and nobody in the room missed the obvious; Sesshoumaru didn't care so long as he went down fighting. Oh, he wanted to stop the problem, wanted to reclaim the west…but Damia's death at his claws was foremost in his mind. And, as he now strongly suspected, if he died in the attempt…well, so be it. He'd thought of the possibility before. He was willing to do whatever it took. Sesshoumaru was no stranger to death. He'd danced though her courtyard before, and if now was the time to die…

He'd just make sure he took Damia with him.

Sesshoumaru tried to justify the act in his mind, tried to resign himself. There had never really been a particular reason for him to live before, and he should be able to wander into death with hardly more feeling than he had had, all these years on his own. But…

Privately, Tosa wondered_ what_ the hell Damia had done to provoke the normally stoic lord to such an extreme, but let it go. It was more important to make sure Sesshoumaru knew what he was getting into. They had only one shot at this, and if he goofed it up because he suddenly picked _now_, of all times, to develop emotions beyond annoyance or indifference…Anger was their enemy as much as anything else; anger made you rash, and lead to stupid decisions they could not afford.

"Yes, I _know _that. I'm not saying it_ isn't_ a good plan. It's actually the best we have" Tanuma explained patiently. "All I'm saying is that you need to be prepared. Which is what we're going to do; prepare. For instance, did you know she's got a handful of priests she's been watching, waiting for a good opportunity kidnap them and bind them to her? It isnt a rumor; I found the village she's been watching. You went up against her _and _Mesau before, and failed. I'll admit they surprised you, but you have to know how much power she's got behind her without adding more to it!"

Sesshoumaru sighed. "I know. I've wondered what exactly she has before, but it has been….difficult…to find out more than what I know from experience. Don't underestimate me, Tanuma. I can match, or nearly match, what she had then." Hopefully he could; what had she gotten since then? If this was only a simple duel, Damia's physical strength against his own, he was sure he could wind. But with that bit of underhandedness involving Mesau... Sesshoumaru just hoped it would be enough…that _he_ would be enough…

"Yes, but what about what she's got _now_, Sesshoumaru?" Satsuma frowned. "This was why I wanted Kagome here. She's the only one of us who could help you against something like that. I know little of miko. Tanuma knows more, but not enough. And Tosa is hopeless with anything mystical, youki or miko power." Satsuma knew enough to know what had to be done, what it might cost, but there was no avoiding it. Sesshoumaru had to see it too, surely...

"Hey!" Tosa blinked. "I resent that, thanks!"

Sesshoumaru's eyes darkened, and he stopped himself from showing the amount of desperate irritation stirring inside. He couldn't back down. Didn't they see that? And if they were suggesting what he thought they were…

Sesshoumaru had made it his business to find out about the bond Damia and Mesau shared, and to find out about both sides of the whole thing. He knew what would go into such a thing. Satsuma had to know the risks. And...

"I'll let you think on that, Sesshoumaru." Satsuma rose from her seat gracefully, kimono sleeves brushing back from the pattern of nine red lines on her arms. She turned, and left, sighing. Sesshoumaru hadn't thought of asking Kagome to help him, obviously, or he'd have said so. Had Kagome thought of it? A miko of her ability ought to know… why hadn't Sesshoumaru enlisted her aid? Perhaps Kagome had refused, or didn't want to do so, but still…one had to wonder… how was Kagome going to help? She hadn't come with Sesshoumaru just for sightseeing, clearly. What could she do to help them? What was her plan?

Satsuma closed the door behind her, leaving Sesshoumaru facing Tosa, and Tanuma.

Tosa leaned forwards, frowning at the closed door. "Alright. I've drafted a scroll to be sent out, calling the council. I haven't sent it yet. It will be gone by morning, unless I hear objections from your direction?"

"Send it. Soon." Sesshoumaru smiled, grim frost on his features. "Even with this news, I will not be deterred." Nothing would stop him now, not fear of death, not something so small as a letter. Sesshoumaru tried to resign himself to the inevitability of it all, once again. He'd go honorably, in battle. That should be enough for one of his kind.

Tosa sighed softly, wishing he had something else to offer. Sesshoumaru didn't need to throw his life away on revenge….but what else was there, if they wanted to stop civil war? He was an adult, and Tosa knew arguing would only make him more stubborn.

"Thought you'd say that. Normally, I'd be cautioning you right about now, but the sad fact is, I can't think of anything better to do. Alright. I'll send it. The council should be in a weeks time. I think everyone will want to come without needing any prodding. Ezo is desperate for some way to control her domain, to keep it from over-boiling, Damia will want to know what the hell I think is going to happen if I call council, and Choshu will want to sit and watch the sparks fly and side with the victor, probably."

Tosa sat back, terse description finished. "We'll leave within...three days? It should take only one for the messenger to arrive. We'll be in Aizu first off the mark."

Sesshoumaru nodded. "Thank you, Tosa. I am in your debt." Under three days. That was plenty of time, to learn as much from Tanuma as he could, to review the reports if he was able, to prepare. Damia was stronger now than he was; he'd figured as much. The question was, how _much_ stronger?

And…what was he going to do about it? So much to think about…

111111111111111111

There was a knock on the door. Kagome paused, and turned around from the window. Who could it be? She wasn't expecting anyone...surely Sesshoumaru couldn't have finished meeting with Tosa and Satsuma yet?

Kagome walked slowly towards the door, feeling ridiculously silly to be thinking that the person on the other side might be a spy, or worse. She was being paranoid. Nevertheless...

It wasn't paranoia if they really _were_ out to get you. (The trouble was often persuading others that this was the case.)

Kagome opened the door, wearing her most vapid, bright smile. "Yes? Who is it?" She giggled.

Satsuma smiled back wryly. "Come now, Kagome. No need for that."

Kagome blinked, and let her hostess in, feeling foolish, dropping the mask in a flash. "Er... sorry?"

"No, that's fine. I wanted to talk to you. A good half of the rooms in this wing are soundproof, you know, and we put you in one of those. It's quite safe, especially as I've reason to believe you've added your own formidable skills to the task."

Satsuma smiled. "After all, Tanuma told me of the watcher in the woods, which you -"

"But I'm not a miko!" Kagome winced as the words came out too harshly, high and slightly frantic. "I...I haven't finished training, I don't know what I'm doing half the time, I barely know more than I did a year ago..."

Satsuma smiled. "_Not _a miko? Pardon, but aren't you the same Kagome who traveled with Inuyasha, defeater of Naraku, and protector of the Shikon no tama?"

Kagome's hand flew to her neck, where the Shikon hung suspended low beneath her shirt, out of sight and hidden from youkai senses. Satsuma did not fail to notice the gesture, and inwardly, raised a speculative eyebrow. She'd hit it spot on. So this _was_ the same miko, and the Shikon lay not a stones throw away…_out_ of Damia's reach. Satsuma sighed. Thank goodness…

Of course, that also begged the question of what exactly Kagome was doing with Sesshoumaru... From all accounts, the first time they'd met Sesshoumaru had tried to kill her...and Inuyasha and Sesshoumaru had never seen eye to eye, either. Interesting...

"Er...yeah..."

"Then even if you haven't been formally trained, you have experience." Satsuma frowned slightly. There was information in there she hadn't expected. Kagome was not trained? How...? Satsuma was no expert on things spiritual, far from it, but surely miko began their training when they were quite young? Kagome was more than old enough to have long since reached the peak of her powers. Even without training, as she had said, the things she'd done...!

Satsuma knew most of what had occurred on the quest for the Shikon shards. It was common enough gossip, the topic of those who were interested in the Shikon, those waiting for Naraku to be finished off, then take it from the human miko. Damia had thought to do that, once, before Kagome had disappeared from the face of the earth, mystifying even Tanuma in the process. Sesshoumaru, and Inuyasha's exploits were always food for gossip, as were any who were closely tied to the lords and ladies of the domains.

Kagome had vanished just over a year ago, rather like Sesshoumaru had a short time before. He hadn't said what had happened specifically beyond the seal Mesau had placed him under. Where had Kagome gone? A different place, surely. Perhaps the same one she had come from originally.

That wasn't important now. What would be a better thing to ask Kagome about would be what she actually knew, since her training wasn't finished. Satsuma had to at least find out if she knew how to aid Sesshoumaru in the way he might need the most, in days to come; a binding, to share their power the same way Mesau and Damia were linked. It might not come to that, she dearly hoped not, but if the absolute worst should come to pass, that was the way she would have to help. There were drawbacks, certainly, a _great_ many of them, but Kagome had to at least consider it... for what other choice was tere? Satsuma did not think there was any other way to help. And why would Kagome come all this way to watch Sesshoumaru die? She had to have a plan.

"You are not trained?"

"Nope. The first time I knew I had miko powers was on my fifteenth birthday, and I hadn't time afterwards to do much. Inuyasha...he was always dragging us off before I had time to learn much." A small, sad look came into the girls eyes, and Satsuma frowned. Fifteenth birthday? What was the girls village thinking of, to let such power go wanting for so long?

"Surely the miko of your village would have known...?"

"Nah. Where I come from, there are no miko who know anything about spiritual power."

There it was again. Something to do with the sudden appearance, and just as sudden disappearance, of the strange girl. Most pegged her as from the continent, and weren't terribly interested beyond that, but Tanuma had done some digging at Satsuma's request, and had found nothing. Nothing at all before her arrival. It was though she had sprung, fully formed, from thin air...

"I see. Wherever you're from, that was a grave mistake. So what have you learned since then? I want to know my allies strength, and, while youkai know little of spiritual power, perhaps there is some way we can help you before we are all tossed to the fire. What do you know the power that's in the blood?" Satsuma smiled, and nodded at Kagome.

Kagome frowned a bit. She had a feeling that the other woman was seizing her up, trying to quantify the unknown she represented. Kagome toyed with the idea of telling her about the future, but immediately dismissed it. Satsuma might be an ally for now, but she'd hardly known her more than two days. Nope, nothing about time travel.

"Power that's in the blood? I'm, not sure what that is….you mean miko power?" Kagome frowned. She hoped Satsuma was _not_ referring to blood fueled power. It was the most primitive, and most powerful, of spells. Kaede had only touched on it a few times. It wasn't an evil art of itself, but because of its nature, it was often misused. She didn't know anything more about how it was used.

"Never mind. What _do_ you know?" Damn. Either Kagome didn't know, or wasn't admitting to the knowledge. Understandable; it was on the fringe of acceptability. But it was more likely she just didn't know...

"Kaede...she taught me to heal, a bit, and to make illusions. I can do halfway decent shikikami, but nothing too complicated or big. Sometimes I do things without thinking about it, and then I can't do it again. Shields, wards...I understand how they work, but I can't always get it to work properly. Oh. And I can focus purifying power in my hands, and in an arrow. I can shoot fairly decently by now."

Kagome worried her lip, thinking. "Mostly, it's...practice. And having someone to watch and tell me what to fix if I'm doing it wrong. But... there was one thing, maybe, you could help with if there's time."

"You know your own training best. I confess to near total ignorance on the subject." A larger smile from Satsuma, though now she seemed pleased. "That is a fair list of achievements, Kagome. And experience does count for a lot. I'm impressed."

Kagome's cheeks were tinged pink, and Satsuma had to privately wonder at the modesty. A lot of miko did not have nearly the same list of qualifications after years of training. Perhaps she had also been taught about how youki worked… or was avoiding the topic of blood magic, and did know. She had to raise the question again, if she could without raising suspicion.

One could hope.

"Er... yeah. Anyway... Kaede said something a while back about some miko who knew barehanded fighting and were able to focus spiritual energy in their own hands or feet, so it helped if they were unarmed. I can do the one part, the purifying power, easily enough..."

Kagome pulled up a small amount of power, and opened her hand, showing the slight purpled glow around it. Satsuma eyed it appraisingly, noting that there was, even in that simple gesture, enough power to do a bit of damage to her person. A not inconsiderable feat, considering that Satsuma was a powerful kitsune, a nine tail, and leader of her own clan.

Not that Kagome would do that...she was easy going and friendly, though deadly when crossed from all accounts.

"Which leaves learning the actual fighting part. Kaede was going to let Sango teach me, but that hasn't really happened, since Sango is expecting. I learned a bit of the basics of karate at home, but..."

Satsuma straightened. Here at last, was something about miko that she understood. She had never had a head for understanding spiritual power. Youki, the youkai version of power, illusion and kitsune fire, other things of magic, were different. But the art of the hand and foot, that she understood very well. It was often...more difficult for a lady to walk around with a sword. She couldn't always have it with her, and had learned to be nearly as effective without a katana or another metal edge to hand (though an iron fan could be quite effective, if used properly...). It was a bit odd, she thought, that Kagome had learned nothing of miko at her mysterious home, but yet had managed to learn a bit of the art of the hand and foot; usually, human females did not learn such things…or was Satsuma mistaken? She knew a bit about humans, more so than most, but not a lot, not by any means, and she was smart enough to realize that.

"Basics? I can help you there. We won't make you a grandmaster in the few days we have, and I'd suggest staying here and not going to the dojo to learn, but I can at least show you one or two tricks in that time, and see how much you know. If it isn't much, well...it'll still be better than nothing, to bring that knowledge to mind. And perhaps, after this is over, you could come back and train properly, if you so wish. For your assistance…"

Satsuma smiled. She liked teaching, and having a miko as a pupil would be no bad thing later on. Kagome would be rewarded for her help, and Satsuma would get to know her a bit more. If the young woman ever came back and stayed, there would be some amount of loyalty to Satsuma as her teacher. One never knew, in these times, what having friends in the most unlikely places would do.

Training _now_ would help Kagome…but it would also help Satsuma. Quite apart from getting to see up close how a miko worked, there was the chance to apprise Kagome's skills first hand, and to add to them. And she could also, hopefully, get close enough to see what Kagome knew of blood, and the power it held.

That was the only way the miko could help Sesshoumaru, in the end, when he walked into the duel ring. Getting him there was one thing. But beyond… Satsuma hated having to manipulate like this, but it was the only solution she and Tosa saw ahead.

One way or another...Sesshoumaru had to win. The alternative did not bear thinking about.

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_There. Another chapter...mostly on time. Moving 'update day' to Friday or Saturday for now. Sunday through Thursday don't really work as well anymore. Should have the next chapter in a few weeks; schools interfering. _

_Thank you so much to the people who reviewed last chapter! (huge grin) you guys had some awesome points and questions...which made me think more about how everything relates to the rest of the story. The ending isn't quite pinned down, yet, though I work towards that when I can. It changed, a bit, because of some of the holes in my little story that were pointed out...which should now be filled in, until you knock them down again. XD I love it. _

_Another note: the final version of chapter 23 is up, if you want to look. Tiny scene near the start I added...feel free to check it out. Thanks so much, Trisak! Hope to get more stuff up soon like it..._

_And, lastly, after my long rambling notes, any thoughts, comments, criticisms (aka: reviews) you have would be most welcome (huge grin) Your reviews make my world go round..._


	28. Ch27:Cramming

**Extra disclaimer:** L-space is the creation (Actually, this phenomena might be real – I've been in some _very_ dimensionally strange secondhand bookstores and libraries.) of Terry Pratchett. I'm just snitching the concept. (grins)

**:: Cramming ::**

Kagome had worked though the exercises Satsuma had left with her yesterday evening, and was proceeding to do the same again this morning. She was drenched in sweat, and privately winced as she thought of what Sesshoumaru must be thinking. Sweat equated to 'did not smell pretty', and with his sensitive nose...eew.

She glanced over. He sat near the window, head propped up and appearing lost in thought. Yesterdays arrival in the South, and the meeting, had given him much to think on, she supposed. Between what Sesshoumaru had told her, and Satsuma, Kagome had a fairly good idea of what was going on.

Basically, they were outgunned. Mesau, added to Damia, and all those rumors of more miko, more priests that Damia had been thinking of getting control of…Kagome shivered. She'd been told that Damia was looking at adding _her _and the Shikon to her 'collection' at one point.

Scary thought. Kagome had had _no _idea that the higher-ups in youkai society had been thinking of the jewel at all, much less gossiping about her exploits. She hardly even knew anything about youkai society at all! She'd been startled to learn most people knew of their oddball group in some way. Sesshoumaru had reassured her that most wouldn't go after the jewel, but still… she hadn't known till now that she could even have been in danger!

Sesshoumaru…

Kagome frowned. Blood magic. What did it have to do with Sesshoumaru? She didn't know enough about it to make a decision. All she knew was that it was very old, and very powerful. Kagome wondered, as she concentrated on pivoting her foot enough for the roundhouse kick, if there was a library around here. Of course, it might not have anything on miko power given that this was a _youkai_ castle, but...worth a shot, right? She was hesitant in asking Sesshoumaru for information like that, and, while Satsuma and Tosa seemed friendly enough, she didn't quite trust them yet. She'd only known them for a little over two days! Had she been younger, and more naïve, she might have entrusted them with her secrets, her questions, but by now Kagome had leaned to hold herself back just a little bit.

Sesshoumaru watched her practicing, slightly bemused. He had heard her mention something about hand to hand fighting before, but it had never occurred to him to teach her, or to ask how much she knew. Rather an oversight, but no help for it now; there wasn't time in which to teach her much, only to try and bring what she already knew back to the forefront of her mind. You had to continue to practice for those skills to remain in your body memory; it was the first thing to leave if you stopped. Give it a few months, and you'd be in sorry shape.

She wasn't bad for a beginner. Satsuma had said she was going to try and help Kagome learn a bit more in the three days they had left before leaving. The letter of summons had gone out this morning. Sesshoumaru wondered if, later, he could ask to stop close to the well on the trip to Aizu. He had the vague thought of retrieving Tenseiga from the future, though he wasn't sure what good it would do. It would be nice to see the family that Kagome had left behind, perhaps. Kagome hadn't been home in several weeks. She could visit while they were there...

Of course, Satsuma couldn't stay and train all day. It would be suspicious, and she had other duties. So Sesshoumaru watched Kagome work through the exercises on her own, clearly trying her hardest.

Again, not bad for a beginner, but... "Lift your knee more. It is a weapon, correct? Aim it at your opponent. A weapon is no use pointed at the ground. If you're going to practice, do it right."

Kagome stopped, and stared at him, startled. Sweat trickled down her face, and her face was flustered, pink with exertion, standing out sharply against the dark cloud of fine hair.

"What?" Kagome blinked, confused. She hadn't realized he was watching her. Although, maybe that was a good thing; provided, of course, that he didn't laugh at her...

"Your knee. Bring it up more. The rest was fine. Good technique, and there is a certain... meanness... to it" He shifted in his seat to see her better, deciding to help in his own way. It was raining outside, and he did not feel like going out. He didn't want to practice in the dojo either, mind too pensive to think of picking up a sword. Later, perhaps. He had been wanting to think when Kagome began training, and had gone on a walk. Since his return, watching her had distracted him nicely.

Kagome blinked, a warm little glow starting to make itself felt. Had he for once, actually said she was good at something? He had! She began to smile. Except...

"Mean? But I'm not mean!"

Sesshoumaru frowned. "That is not exactly what I meant. I meant that, when you fight...you do not hold back. You will pursue, like I have seen before, and won't back away.Youkai... call it killer instinct. But I did not think that was an appropriate description of you. It doesn't mean you are a bloodthirsty killer. It is a good thing to have, and does not mean you cannot be kind."

"Ah. I...think I see it..." Kagome sounded a bit doubtful, but accepted the explanation, privately thinking it was a bit over her head. He seemed to think it was something in her favor, and she trusted that. A small smile at the rare nod of approval surfaced.

...Even if 'killer instinct' were the _last _words she'd have used to describe herself...

Hesitantly, Kagome slowly went though another kick, testing out his other advice. It seemed to work better...at least, it looked cleaner in the small mirror on the wall. She wouldn't have had this much trouble a few months ago, she knew. She'd been decent, perhaps, but nothing special, and hadn't made it very far in training anyway. All this was doing was making her slightly more prepared...but every bit counted. Earlier, she had wanted to practice her archery, but hadn't been able to see a way to do it. Ah, well...

"Like this?"

"Yes. Like that." Sesshoumaru blinked, and continued to watch, while Kagome went though more of the work, trying hard to do everything Satsuma had wanted her to do. She smiled, knowing she wasn't the best, but she must be doing something right. Sesshoumaru was very sparing with praise, and if he'd actuality said something... Kagome threw herself into the workout with gusto, running through stretches, crunches, sidekicks, roundhouse, front, punching combos... more stretches...and through it all, she felt content, relaxing into the purely physical stress relief, and the repetition of the motions. Sesshoumaru had said something good...

If she hadn't been doing her training with Kaede for a month, Kagome wasn't sure she'd have survived this long! But it _was _important; she knew that. So she pressed on.

Sesshoumaru watched her, absently keeping an eye on progress and interjecting something when she slipped up. Practice did not make perfect; it made habit. If she was not doing it right, she would continue to not do it right unless it was picked up and corrected. Not that that happened often; as he had noted before, she was not bad for a beginner, and she had done this before. It showed, both in the strength and the fluidity of motion. She didn't hesitate the way a true novice would. And she did have both good basic technique, and – for lack of a better word – killers instinct. Out of practice Kagome might be, but what he guessed she'd known before seemed to be coming back easily enough. It wouldn't do much to prepare her, but it was better than sitting and waiting for your fate to descend.

Fate. He turned his head away momentarily, entranced by the rain outside. Kagome...

Tosa and Satsuma clearly thought he had no chance against Damia without her. Or rather, without her strength wedded, welded to his own, to counter what Damia had gathered in. And there was only one way to do that…

He knew what they had meant when the blood bond was brought up. It would solve his problems, yes; Sesshoumaru had to admit he was tempted. Very much tempted. But...

That would _not_ be fair to Kagome.

Such a bond was meant to _last_, and undoing it after a 'one time use,' so to speak, would be difficult if not impossible to do. Something might be damaged, for either of them. Kagome might die, might end up stuck with him for eternity...

He wouldn't mind that, he realized with some small amount of amusement, mixed with shame and a cocktail of whirling emotions too confusing to identify. He wouldn't mind that at all, though he'd never admit it. He would be able to tolerate her, unlike most other humans he had met. More than tolerate; enjoy her company, as he had these past few days, past month. Sometimes, he found himself unable to imagine what life without the small miko would be like, she'd wormed her way so close. What would it be like to wake up, knowing there would be no puzzling, cryptic comments about Elvis during the day? What would it be like to live in a world where everything was serious, where there was nothing without purpose, where one did not simply embark on a picnic at a whim? A world without her?

But at the same time... To have her die trying to undo that sort of bond...(if she even agreed in the first place, and didn't turn away in horror...) he wouldn't risk it. Undoing blood magic was too risky once done. She would never even consider it! He was afraid to even mention it, worried it might turn her away!

Even a bond left intact, assuming that she even agreed to try, would be unfair to her, taking her away from the normal life of a human, creating a reputation not of her doing. He couldn't be so selfish… He simply couldn't ask for that! This had nothing to do with dignity, a Taiyoukai's pride not allowing him to seek help; no, this had everything to do with concern for Kagome.

He knew she would want to help him, had done so, and would continue to do so. But not like this! No miko would ever consider it. He couldn't ask _this_ of her! It didn't matter if she was too close for comfort or not, he was determined not to ask, to protect her from such a fate. She would be horrified if she knew, he was sure of it. To be taken away from her friends, be removed, to be stuck with _him_, a failure, someone who'd tried to kill her the first time they'd met, though that had long been put behind them...

He knew, equally well, that he would die in the confrontation ahead without something to strengthen him. He had known in the back of his mind all along that it was a possibility, but hadn't really thought of it before now seriously. He'd been too focused on getting this far, not on what would happen after.

So be it. He was willing to risk death so long as he brought Damia down with him. He would ask that Kagome watch, and if he failed to kill Damia, it would be up to her, to Tosa, to Satsuma, to see the upstart dead. Probably Kagome...Tosa and Satsuma might not wish to act in light of what the political consequences might be. Kagome was free of those.

He would, if not able to kill, at least wound Damia near to death. An arrow should finish the task if he could not, and Sesshoumaru would be able to go into the arena with a clear mind, secure in the knowledge that he would not have neglected to right what his failure as a lord had begun. He would be able to seek revenge without regrets.

Except...he thought he had resigned himself to death, long ago. He had, for many years, not really cared. But now...

He couldn't help but wish he'd had a chance to get to know Kagome a bit more, to live life a bit longer, and to find out what it might be like to live life with more of a smile, even if it was only on the inside.

He felt a puzzling bit of sadness, as he tried to accept the inescapable fact that he would surely die. He'd known it might come to this all along; he had hoped for better, but had wondered, deep down, if it might not come down to death in the attempt….so why…

He would _not_ drag Kagome down with him. She deserved better, and asking for her help, in the one way that might make a difference... he would _not_ do it, and he would _not_ let her throw her chance at life away from him. He would only go as far as asking for assurance of Damia's death. No more.

It would be the final solution, not a perfect ending, but one he could accept. He hoped. If only there was another way...!

"Hey. Sesshoumaru."

He glanced up, finally startled out of the morbid thoughts running through his head. Kagome stood over him, rubbing at her arm. "I...think I'm done for now. I want a bit of a breather. There's no point running myself into the ground, and...I wanted to ask you. Does this place have a library?"

Library? He blinked, and thought over what he remembered. Yes, there was a library...he fuzzily seemed to recall some place where they kept poetry. Weird that Kagome would want to read it, but... no stranger than some things she came up with. "Yes. I assume your asking means you wish to see it?"

"Yeah. Reading something might be a good way to relax. Do you know where it is?"

"Yes. I will take you, if you wish." They hadn't gone past the library in the tour yesterday, had they? Sesshoumaru gave a mental shrug. There was really too much to see in one half day, going at the leisurely pace they had been traveling at. They had not gone near the dojo, just the grounds and about half of the main house. Nowhere near the library.

"Hang on, just a sec. I'll wear the necklace. Nobody needs to see – or smell! – Amiritsu going into a library." Kagome grinned, and dove into her bag, fetching the polished stones out. "There. Are you staying in the room after showing me the way?"

"Probably, yes. I…wish to think on a few things." Many, many things. Somehow, he had to find it in himself to accept what fate had dealt…

"Alright. I'll come back after I find something, or if it's getting late." Kagome put the necklace on, and disappeared from view. A few seconds later, Sesshoumaru felt a soft, blurred hand on his arm, and turned towards the direction of the library.

Kagome grinned, and kept the slow pace easily, wondering what Sesshoumaru wanted to think about. Probably strategy, last minute things… She hoped she found something on the blood bonds. There had to be something… some way she could be of help…

They turned down the corridors, and turned again, Sesshoumaru stepping slowly enough that her shorter legs had time to catch up with his much longer strides. Kagome followed him through, memorizing the layout and how to get back to her quarters after. She didn't think she'd take the necklace off till she returned; too much chance of discovery.

They paused in front of a door, and Sesshoumaru stepped back, nodding imperceptibly before gliding away. Kagome straightened her shoulders, and went inside, slipping though the half open rice door to the shelves of scrolls and paper inside with barely a whisper of sound from the screen being pushed back.

She glanced behind her, but Sesshoumaru had already vanished. Kagome gave an invisible shrug, and sighed. He probably had a million things to think about to get ready for the duel. She didn't need to distract him from whatever he was mulling over.

There was nobody else in the room. Kagome wandered down the narrow, crooked shelves piled high with writings, and silently giggled. It felt like she'd wandered into L-space. There were unexpected nooks in the shelves, and she couldn't help but feel that this room was much larger inside than out. Kagome began reading the titles on the shelves, skimming past reports on tithes from 200 years ago, a crumbling section on swords, and other curious things, among them a large section of soppy romance novels, or the equivalent, at any rate...

Miko, miko….she didn't even see anything about humans, let alone miko, here. At least the shelves appeared to be organized in some fashion, though it definitely wasn't dewey decimal. That would speed things up a lot. Kagome was reminded, with a shiver, of the terrible mess that journal had been when they found it. Thank the gods this wasn't going to be a repeat of _that_ cataloging nightmare…

Kagome frowned, and then grinned. She had a whole afternoon today to look over the place thoroughly. If there was anything, that ought to be enough to find it.

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Sesshoumaru stepped carefully along the corridor, still thinking, before shaking his head, and frowning. Stewing like this wouldn't help. He had promised himself he'd look at the reports Tanuma had mentioned, and he should do that now, before the spymaster became so busy with preparations he'd have no time to talk to Sesshoumaru. He didn't need to brood.

Sesshoumaru straightened slightly, aware that he was creating an excuse to keep himself busy, but not caring. Anything would be better than sitting and staring at the wall. Gods alone knew he'd done enough of that to last a lifetime and a half.

Glad of something to do, he set off in the direction of Tanuma's study, hoping to find a few more things out, and to mention the possibility of a stop at Kagome's village on the way to Aizu to Tanuma. It should be quite workable, if he insisted.

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Kagome's fingers trailed along the shelf, close enough to just about touch the material of the pages resting quietly, slightly dusty, indicating no one had read them in a while. Her eyes scanned the books, loose papers and scrolls tiredly. She'd been at this for two hours already, and her eyes were starting to feel strained, and her body heavy, lethargic. But she had managed to find something, a worn scroll with mention of a fight between youkai and miko near the town, several hundred years ago. It probably wasn't relevant, much, but it was the closest she'd gotten to her goal yet. At least it _mentioned_ miko...and it wasn't yet more soggy poetry. Who'd have guessed there was so much of it in this library?

Kagome shook her head, and sighed. Why had she thought a _youkai _castle library would have this kind of information? She didn't know, except that she'd needed a break from the physical activity, and this was better than doing nothing.

Her eyes felt grainy, the lids weighted with sticky sandpaper. Reports on household goods in 1291 for guards, retainers, wages...

Her eyes skipped past something, and she frowned. What was that? Her eyes went back and reread the list. Potters, gardeners, foot soldiers ...and... priestess.

Priestess. Kagome frowned slightly, and pulled the gently crumbling stack of paper off the shelf, after making sure no one had witnessed the paper moving 'of its own accord.' (Unfortunately, the necklace only seemed to work on those things she wore, or had tucked inside her clothes, like the other scroll. Some experimentation had provided the information. Anything carried in her hands would appear to float.) Kagome glanced at the window, and noticed that the lanterns had been lit, and dusk was falling.

No one seemed to be about, so she dared to take the papers with her to investigate closer, headed towards one of the small, unexpected rooms within the shelves of ancient, crackling paper. You could only enter this 'room' at the corner, and the rest was enclosed by shelves. There was a very thin film of dust in the air, hovering over the tatami mats and single faded cushion.

Kagome sat down gingerly, and examined the words on the scrolls she'd brought with her.

General Atsuina, report, east canyon north of Iyo on Shikoku, May of 1044. It was quite old, this paper, and not very detailed. Kagome read the report from the general, how they had been collecting taxes when the miko of the village attacked, backed by angry samurai. Two soldiers dead, three wounded, with sword wounds. Apparently the miko had been carrying a katana, though precious little else was noted. Kagome scanned though it quickly, and sighed in annoyance. Nothing. Damn.

It was interesting to see the youkai reasoning behind the attack, since usually she saw the other side of things, but...there was no time for philosophical analysis right now. Kagome set the information aside, and decided to replace the paper on the shelf later. Nothing of use.

She carefully opened the other paper up to read, and frowned. A simple list of salaries for servants and retainers...

With one human priestess on the payroll. Why?

One Nadia Hirosaki was listed as a miko, and as the companion of an Arameki Sao. Interesting. Kagome blinked, and checked the records. The woman had been entered onto the list, and then noted as deceased, along with Arameki, in a raid 128 years later.

Strange...for a_ human_, at least. And why would there be a youkai miko? She didn't think there even was such a thing. Something told her it was important. Why was that name even on the list, and why for such a long period of time? Was it a mistake, or...something more to it?

She tucked the paper away in her clothes, and up and returned to the shelves, digging some more. She hunted, in hopes of shedding some light on it, and eventually turned up more information on the woman. Miko, definitely human, 21 when she'd entered service...no children...

Bond. Bond with Arameki. Kagome's eyes lighted on that one sentence in the terse description, and widened. She quickly scanned he paper, bu there was nothing, beside that sentence. But it was enough.

Bond. So that was it. It had to be part of what she was looking for, though she couldn't tell if it was a variation on a different bond or if it was what she wanted to know. There was no information on how to go about it, at any rate. Only that one sentence: "Bond with Arameki."

Kagome went back and pulled all the books off the shelf, and frowned, reading carefully. There wasn't much to go on, but if she worked at it, there might be something there. Clearly there must be a connection between the strange time-line, and the bond, perhaps even something to do with Arameki. What was it? And what did it have to do with her, and Sesshoumaru?

Kagome glanced around the room, and left the books out of the way in her hidden nook, intending to come back later when she was fully awake, and not feeling like she'd keel over from lack of sleep. Maybe food...

Her stomach rumbled, and Kagome realized dinner had come, and probably gone, while she was lost in L space. Damn. Sesshoumaru was probably wondering where she was... Kagome didn't want to worry him...

She left the library, and slowly made her way to the rooms, thoughts filled with dusty paper and the hidden stack of books.

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Tanuma glanced from his post near the library door, and wondered if the unseen miko had vanished, yet. There was really no way of telling where she was, or what she was up to, when she had the necklace on. Useful thing, but...rather irritating, in some ways. (Maybe he could somehow get one for himself...)

At the moment, it was an obstacle.

He wasn't even entirely sure that she was still here; he only knew this was_ probably_ where she was because he'd asked Sesshoumaru, under the pretext of Satsuma wanting to see how training went.

He'd been told the miko had disappeared from the rooms by his own watchers, while Sesshoumaru wandered to the library and then towards his office. He'd deduced she must have left him at that point, and had figured the rest out on his own. You didn't remain in this job for vary long without learning a healthy sense of paranoia and sneakiness. Tanuma knew that particular library very well, having spent a great deal of time there looking old records up, and finding the odd book of fiction to read. Tosa kept a fairly large amount of what could be considered feudal fiction, and poetry. Tanuma suspected it was because of the soppy romantic endings. His ruler had a hidden love for that kind of book.

Kagome was on the right track, looking for information, but it was doubtful that anything in _there_ would actually help. The documents that were more useful, more sensitive, were kept in other places with no general access. Unless she was after a book for bedtime reading, she was out of luck. But Tanuma didn't think so. Kagome was sharp, and slacking off with a book at the moment didn't seem right. Tanuma frowned again. She was unusually sharp for a human woman, and well educated, not something that was common. And she had appeared, and disappeared from his watchful nets with ease. What was her secret?

Of course... back to the current problem, he wasn't sure if she was in there, or not. Damn invisibility necklace...who knew_ where_ she was by now?

Tanuma shook his head, and vanished from the corridor. If she'd returned to the room for supper, he'd know where she was, and he should look there. From what he'd heard, it was unlikely she would be able to make a shikikami copy to take her place, while the real Kagome roamed free. Bloody useful, maybe, but Kagome didn't know enough to do it, he was willing to bet.

Luckily, he knew how to make his own copies. Kitsune were the youkai most gifted with illusion, and he had his own ways of getting to the meat of a problem. Tanuma wasn't able to make shikikami, but there were a few ways he could get around it. And he had others to help. It paid, being the one in charge. You could delegate, and create all sorts of ways of checking on things with no one knowing, with little effort.

As soon as he could, he double checked on the watcher stationed well away from the room, and confirmed that Kagome was back in the room, out of the way.

Slightly disturbed to learn Kagome could sneak past him without him being aware of it at all, Tanuma shook his head, and returned to the library, with the thought of seeing what books she had been after.

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Damia poked her nose into the tiny room, annoyed. Mesau was still stretched out on her futon amid the stacks of paper, completely worn out from her latest attempt to break past the wards on the window. Sleeping, and useless. Damia couldn't be having with this, waiting on the human to become well rested enough to do the work again.

Damia left the room silently, and returned to stalking the corridors, absently watching as the moon rose, casting its wavering, pale shadow on the walkway. Damia turned off the path, into the garden, and sat down with a sigh, intending to think on a few things. She drew her feet in close, and wrapped her fingers together, a barrier against the cool night air. Not that she was cold, of course. Damia let out a long, low sigh, as she consciously tried to let the tension on the day wash away, let it fall away from her into the limpid dark waterfall below.

Mesau might be able to stretch out and sleep, but she couldn't, not know. Damia was starting to wear down in some ways too. It was all this talk of war...

She wished, knowing it would never happen, but still daring to dream, that Tosa and Satsuma might finally see reason, that Choshu would acknowledge that she, that her cause, was right. Ezo...she didn't matter anymore, not after her generals had wiggled out from beneath her control. The North was an ally, at least, and Aizu followed whoever won. It had been a very long time since Aizu dictated, and the domains followed. It was the other way round nowadays.

And soon, they would all be able to work together to free Japan from the yoke of the west. If things kept up in this fashion, with more arabesques coming every year, more missionaries who turned the minds of human Japan against them, and handed them the weapons to fulfill their dreams, if it continued...

Damia wondered briefly what to do about Mesau. She didn't seem up to the task of spymistress anymore, unfortunately, but there wasn't really a way to replace her. Sorai was still not to be trusted. The woman was...quiet. Too quiet. She owed everything to Sesshoumaru, and knew quite well that Damia didn't like her one bit. But she couldn't be gotten rid of, at this point.

Damia closed her eyes, and sat down against the quietly burbling waterfall. Sorai was actually a good example of why she was fighting. The continent sent them more immigrants every year like Sorai, it seemed. Youkai fleeing from the few Europeans - and from the ever growing corruption in the imperial court of China; youkai who'd been powerful, once, but no more. The Ming dynasty had once had promise, and had flourished, sending ships and people out, but now it had turned inwards, and had turned upon the youkai as a cause of failure. Many had been driven out, and more, she guessed, would follow once the west gained control of the weak human government...

As if youkai should for human wars. It was a mark of how far they had fallen that she was taking a human concern this seriously Youkai ought to be above such things, not enmeshed in them.

Damia felt for those from the continent, but still didn't trust the few immigrants. There was to much longstanding enmity with the continent. But it gave her a reason to fight on. She couldn't let Japan turn into the same mess that China was growing into. She was right. Damia knew she was right.

She wasn't stupid, though. She knew other people thought they were right too. She didn't want to have to fight them. If the youkai fought too much amongst themselves, they'd just turn into easy pickings. Humans bounced right back after major wars, but it took the long lived youkai many, many more years to rebuild.

But yet...she couldn't stop trying. If she did nothing, it was certain death. The Fellowship, those sympathetic towards humanity...they'd have them all either bowing to the mortals, or lulled into complacency enough that when they were attacked, they would be decimated. Damia knew quite well humans had no love for her kind from personal experience. They'd kill them if they could. Even Mesau would turn on her if she ever got the chance to do so safely. No, they couldn't go that way. Someone had to do something, and, as the old saying went, if you wanted it done right, you did it yourself.

Mesau, again! She just wasn't getting the job done. Damia sighed, and closed her eyes briefly before opening them again. Mesau was a tool. She wouldn't be thrown away, of course. Damia, in her own way, was a packrat, and Mesau was still quite useful. But she needed to know that when the time came, the sword wouldn't break in her hand. Sesshoumaru was still out there, somewhere. Waiting. Mesau wasn't enough. She had failed before, when he was not fully focused on his surroundings.

She was starting to regret how she'd disposed of him. At the least she should have posted a guard, or something. He could ruin everything! Damia wondered if he was connected to this latest report of Tanuma and the stranger, Joseibi, meeting with Tosa and Satsuma.

She'd only just confirmed that there was no actual member of the army named Joseibi today, leaving her to wonder who he really was. Mesau had, one again, failed to turn anything of note up. So if not a member of the army, who was he? Spy, traitor...?

Unknown...and therefore, dangerous.

Something told her he – Joseibi – was important. And another premonition told her that Sesshoumaru would show up, before the end of everything. She had to make sure she was ready for him.

Damia got to her feet, slightly calmer for sitting outside and thinking. She watched the moon ripple on the water of the pond, and the faint black outline of a bonsai tree, with dark koi floating below the surface. A delicately clawed finger touched the old tree, remembering the day it was planted. She'd liked helping in the garden a long time ago, before her mother had put a stop to it, complaining of dirty kimono's and grubby paws. The tree had grown older, but it still looked like the same tiny shape she'd been delighted to help plant. Old Manji the gardener had smiled, and had let her get her hands dirty.

Time to plant more seeds, perhaps. Damia decided that it was time to collect the miko she'd been keeping an eye on. They seemed like they might agree to her deal, at least, and even if they didn't they might come to understand, in time. Both had traveled extensively and seen the effects the newcomers brought with them. Some care in choosing your tools was always required. And Damia was wise enough to know when she would need tools. She was no pride-filled taiyoukai, refusing even the aid _offered_. She prided herself on practicality, and strength was no only developed your own, but found. She'd need everything she could get to stand against the world; the west, the continent, and Sesshouamru.

Damia turned to go inside, headed for the mound of paperwork on her desk, stacked neatly and waiting for her to read. There was always paperwork to read.

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Tanuma slunk around the library, respect for Kagome's invention slowly growing. He'd already held the woman who could escape his net of informants so easily in high esteem, but since meeting her in person, that estimate had gone up a notch. At least, when it came to ability at hiding. He wasn't so sure in some other ways, but that couldn't be helped. He wished he knew more about her, about her motives.

It was hard to tell what she'd been looking for. Occasionally he'd run across a fingerprint that might belong to her, but it seemed random, as though she'd walked up and down the rows touching the shelves. Kitsune were nowhere near as good as their inu cousins for noses, but even that had been taken away by the power of that necklace. Only the new fingerprints – the ones not in the romance section - told him she had even been here.

His eyes fell on an empty space, the slight layer of dust disturbed, and the eyebrows climbed slightly. Why on earth would she want to know about salaries? He couldn't tell what had been there, but...

No, he could. Tanuma noticed the stray paper tucked into the side of the shelf, waiting for Kagome to return, perhaps, and slowly smiled as he read what she had been after.

She wanted to know about Nadia Hirosaki and Arameki Sao. Or, more likely, about...bonds. Tanuma smiled slightly. She might be back later. He'd have to double check, of course but if she returned...well, then.

She'd get nothing more of use from this library – everything to do with records in here was old and useless. And there was nothing else besides the fiction but records. Nothing more…relevant, perhaps, was the best word.

Tanuma knew of a few things that might be of interest, from the other, more private, collection. Perhaps he would place them here, just for the duration, and see if the bait wasn't snapped up...

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Kagome frowned, and stuck her head under the pillow. The trees kept scratching the outside of the house...

Black feathers drifted, as the breeze stirred the dark bangs draped over her dreaming face.

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_First off, let me say a **huge** thanks to those of you who reviewed last chapter. I've never gotten that many reviews, ever. I'm really happy. You guys rock! I love reading what you think of the story so far! (huge, stupid grin on face) **Thank you so much! **And really, the theories you come up with...some of them (won't say which ones) are pretty close...must be getting predictable, eh? Lol._

_**Secondly, I apologize for the time it too to get this out. It shouldn't have taken that long, but I had a research essay and a crapload of art to finish for midterms. I'm sorry! I can't promise it won't happen again, because it probably will at finals. But I'll try!**_

_Now, about **this **chapter...I simply could not resist putting Kagome through the feudal equivalent of Karate. Lol. (Takes Taekwondo herself, and almost has a red belt) Hopefully that's not **too** Marry Sue, but...it **is **at least based on reality, from my own classes. Lol. _

_As for 'killer instinct' – it **is** the wrong word, because it conjours up visions of people killing other people, and that's not it at all. I hope I managed to describe it accurately, but if not...That's how is been described, wordwise, to me. It is a real thing, if you didn't know, though it isn't anything to do with killing. Simply means that you don't hold back. You w**ill** hit that person, and you'll do it hard, because it's a fight, and you don't want them to hit you, so you hit first first and worry if they busted something later. It isn't a 'mwahaha, I want to hurt you' thing, either, more a 'I want to win'. It's very hard, if not impossible, to really teach that to someone who's not willing to put that extra edge in. Means you're far more likely to win, even if the skill level is less. Kagome, I think,** does** have this. She's willing to put her heart into her actions, and doesn't freeze up. Facing down Sesshoumaru with an arrow? Definitely not freezing up._

_Now that I've ranted..._

_Hopefully all the jumping around from viewpoints worked. I was hoping to flesh Damia out a bit more. She's not a totally evil villain, because I think that's boring. There's got to be a good motive in there somewhere...lol. She thinks she's doing what's right, and good, and best for all. Just like everyone else in the world. Hope it started to make sense._

_Reviews, please? Despite the rambling authors note, and the (ahem) long absence... Lol. (is getting greedy, and is asking for muchos reviews. XD)_


	29. ch28:To Aizu

**:: To Aizu ::**

Damia sat, and stared at the note on her desk, which had been delivered this morning. The note stared right back. She wondered if it's arrival had anything to do with the Southern entourage leaving later today. Tosa, and Satsuma, leaving on a ship...

With an official seal like that, and the speed at which it had been delivered, by special messenger (It must have been only sent off yesterday!) the scroll was bound to contain some interesting news. Damia just hoped it was nothing too upsetting.

Slowly, she ran a claw along the seal, breaking it gently. Wax crumbled away, sprinkling on the table like an augury of doom. Slowly, Damia started to read, stomach clenched in trepidation.

Tosa wanted to call the ancient council of Aizu. And...affixed to the bottom of the document where both his _and_ Satsuma's official seals.

What the hell was he playing at?

"You. Get Kyohei for me." She snapped at the uniformed boy just outside the door. He scurried to obey, and Damia sat back, reading the message again.

Official sounding words, more autographed fluff...ah. The meat of the message. Tosa was inviting all the lords to come 'to discuss the problems that plagued' them, and to 'resolve their differences,' more officiousness...

Damia slammed the paper onto the desk harshly. What did Tosa think he would accomplish? What purpose could it possibly serve to collect everyone together to sit and argue for days at a time? He wouldn't move on his position, would he?

_Would_ he? Somehow, she doubted it. And Satsuma would never change her mind. She really believed in some of what the fellowship spouted, and once Satsuma truly _believed_ something, there was no stopping her. Stubborn sophistication, that was her.

So then; What did they knew that she didn't?

Damia paused, fingers drumming on the desk in a thoughtful tempo. It had to be about all those meetings she'd heard of, but hadn't quite managed to find out about. A combination of tight security, and Mesau's incompetence, again. Good thing that would all change soon enough. As long as Matsudaria, and the other operatives, pulled through. Damia picked up a brush, and let the tip hover over the list of things Mesau had noted about this Joseibi character, running through them. She had been supposed to deliver it last night, but...

Damia read the excuse on top, and then the statement that the youkai wasn't anywhere in their records. Lovely. Damia crumpled the paper up, then stopped, and smoothed it out. Pointless. She would meet Joseibi soon enough; it seemed likely that he'd be coming with the Southern entourage if he was as deeply involved as this report seemed to say. Everything that had been passed on from the information network showed they were coming.

She ran over the decisions she'd made last night, and smiled again. It was not a pleasant smile, but one full of determination and iron teeth. Her brief time in the gardens had helped her to see what she had to do.

Clearly, she would go to Aizu. She had to know what was discussed there, and couldn't afford to let the other domains discuss things behind her back. But now more than ever, she could not go unprepared. As soon as Kyohei got here, she'd send him out on a mission. Collect those two miko...

No.

She would do that herself. It was important, after all, that it be doneright. _Personally_.

She would have to go get Mesau up, and head out after...Momiji and Botan, if she recalled their names correctly. The two miko she had been watching knew nothing of her or her plans for them, of course. They did not even know they were being watched, and considered.

Well, they would find out soon, and they would be made to cooperate, however long it took... Damia would take volunteers if she could, but those like Mesau – willing victims - were a rarity. Damia had never heard the term 'press gang' before, or she might have used it. They would be pressed into service.

It would probably take the rest of today to get everything prepared for the seal, and finished, and it would take a few days to accustom herself to the new miko as well, once they were irrevocably bound to her service, days which would be needed for hard travel. With luck, the Western party would take only a day to arrive; they were the closest to Aizu, after all. On the way, she and, to some extent, Mesau would be able to shape the new miko inot something of use.

So. Kyohei could worry about the arrangements that needed to be made so they could leave first thing tomorrow, with a skeleton escort. She'd worry about her own preparations. He would come with her, obviously, as would the 2 new miko and Mesau. Sorai...she wanted to bring her along, if for no other reason than to keep an eye on her. A very few servants, of course, and a handful of the better soldiers, the ones that made up the head of the clan's personal guard. Damia was perfectly capable of becoming a whirlwind of death, should they be attacked on the way to Aizu, but she wanted to be fresh when they arrived. That was what you had guards for in the first place. Most were decent fighters, enough for safety.

Damia got up, and paced, waiting for Kyohei to show up. When he finally arrived, she smiled, and explained her plans, before leaving him to deal with the details. Sometimes, one had to love the joys of being able to delegate.

Damia stalked restlessly down the hall, headed for the room Mesau was currently holed up in. She hoped the miko was awake, and alert for once, not dead to the world. If need be, she'd dump Mesau in the fishpond herself to wake her. Petty, but rather a satisfying idea at the moment. Someone to take her frustration out on... Damia slid aside the screen, and wrinkled her nose at the penetrating odor of the herbs Mesau was currently adding to the wide, flat scrying bowl. With a slight frown of disappointment she noted that Mesau seemed quite awake.

"_Can't_ you use something that doesn't stink quite so much?"

Mesau blinked, and glanced up at her, surprised. "Damia. I didn't expect you, at this time of day. I regret that I cannot use something else, no."

She carefully got up, avoiding the bowl of water and bowed low, back straight as a ramrod. A sign that she was on edge, wondering what she was being called upon so early for. "What can I do for you at this hour?"

Damia smiled, shortly. "We're going out, to check on a few new _friends _for you..."

Mesau couldn't quite hide the look of dismay on her face.

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Kagome rose early, and began working on the stretches and exercises once more. Satsuma had been absent for a while now, but Kagome had hopes of seeing the kitsune woman later this evening, after all the last minute preparations were done with. They were to set out for Aizu just before dinner, this evening. Hopefully by then she'd have something to show her 'teacher,' after a day of working on her own, with the occasional tip from Sesshoumaru.

Sesshoumaru had left just after breakfast, but reappeared in about an hour. He'd watched her work, for a while, saying nothing. Just the occasional thoughtful look had been given her way, and once, a nod of approval. Kagome smiled slightly. He must think she was doing alright, thought she was under no delusions that she would last terribly long against an opponent. Her best, and nearly _only_ defense, was her miko powers. At least those were in slightly better shape...

He'd gone to the dojo later, but she'd stayed in the room. Just like she'd done every other day, really. She was a bit nervous about going out and wandering the corridors, and had stuck close to the room while on her own...she hadn't even ventured out to the dojo with Sesshoumaru once!

'Amiritsu,' Kagome was afraid, would never enter a dojo. Except to possibly sashay across the floor, and give brainless giggles out as tokens of equally trivial affection...

Thank the gods this was the last stretch before they began to travel to Aizu! The Amiritsu persona, which was starting to get on her nerves, could be dropped faster than a hot rice cake once they were in the clear. Tanuma was taking very few people with them; he was the guy in charge of travel arrangements, it appeared. Only trusted people in his employ, and the elite guards would come. She would be able to drop her cover there, as would Sesshoumaru. She wondered if Joseibi was as wearing to him as Amiritsu had become for her.

Of course, the fact that they were leaving soon made her nervous, and meant she'd have to be damn quick with the library research if it was going to be of any use at all.

Her thoughts wandered as she tried to touch her toes, observing the slightly tense, feel-good ache of stretching that spread from her extremities. They'd stop once, along the way, Kagome had learned. Sesshoumaru had requested that they stop near the well, so that he could retrieve Tetsusaiga.

Kagome had looked pointedly at him for a few minutes before hindsight broke into the picture, and he had hastily tacked something on about 'with your permission,' or something close to it. Kagome had relented, realizing that was about as close to an apology as she was going to get, and had agreed to _lend_ it to him. Besides, she could see her family again for a few hours, at least. She had Sesshoumaru to thank for that.

Now, whether that was _intentional_ on his part or not was another question...

The journey should only take a few days, three at most, two at the earliest, to arrive in Aizu. They'd sail up the coast, and, depending on the winds, would put in for the night near present day Tokyo (near the well) and continue the next day, traveling the short distance from the small natural harbor to Aizu on foot. It didn't sound too complicated.

Satsuma had told her, briefly, about Aizu. Home to about five thousand youkai, it was the largest, and _only_, youkai city. A long time ago, there had been a ruler in Aizu, some sort of Emperor, and there had been no domains. Now, there was no-one but the equivalent of the Mayor, or some sort of steward. And the mayors most important function, apparently, after running the city's infrastructure, was to provide a neutral meeting place, and smile and nod at whatever decision was reached between domains. Not since Yamato had the Emperor ruled...

Kagome had found the brief, thumbnail description of the history of youkai fascinating, especially since she'd had no idea any of it existed, before. This trip through the upper crusts was opening her eyes.

She'd seen the bandit, the lone youkai warrior, before. She had never really been to a town, or a youkai's home. Somehow, shard hunting had never lent itself to that, much. But after thinking about it, it only made sense. Even the city, supposedly hidden within the shadow of the mountains, protected from humans (and mostly avoided by them anyway, for health reasons) made sense.

Kagome watched Sesshoumaru as lunchtime approached, puzzled. He seemed a bit pensive today, sitting in his seat near the window. Kagome smiled, and paused. She was getting nervous, thinking of the events that would soon sweep her up. Tingling ran through her arms and legs, leaving her with a loose, shaky feel, as though when she stood up she'd fall right over on limbs that had fallen asleep. All the tension was killing her slowly. She shivered, and rubbed at her arms.

The journey to Aizu, for so long only a hazy thing in the future, not entirely real, was _here_. **Tonight.** They were _going_. It was suddenly quite real, and it was dragging at her, letting loose the contents of an anthill to climb around her stomach. She was anxious, and jittery.

What if something went wrong? She knew they were going against odds that didn't favor them, and every piece of news seemed to paint the future that much darker. How could Sesshoumaru possibly win? Everyone seemed to think he'd loose, or...or die...

Kagome's eyes widened. _Die_. She hadn't thought of that before, only that he seemed sure to lose. She couldn't think of why it hadn't occurred to her. Probably because she hadn't wanted it to, she realized with a grimace. She was too much of an optimist to think like that. She had never truly contemplated the fact one of her friends might die in their battles, before. Oh, she'd been worried, but not since Inuyasha had died had it finally struck home that she was not invulnerable, that Sesshoumaru, now, was not either.

If he did lose...Damia would kill him for good, this time.

No more messing about with sharks with laser beams; this time she'd go after him with a sword in the dueling ring, or something equally sharp and lethal. Short, and to the point.

And very, very dead.

Bad. Badbadbadbad...Kagome shook her head, and sat up straight, nerves twitching and taught. She didn't want that to happen; if she could do something to stop that, she would. Sesshoumaru was a friend. A good one. She thought briefly of a world without him, and blinked quickly. She didn't want to even _think_ about such a possibility...

Abruptly, Kagome stood up. Sesshoumaru turned around from the window and raised an inquiring eyebrow.

"I'm going out, for a bit. I'll be back soon, okay?" Kagome kept her voice level, but even she could hear the faint note of anxiety leaking through. Damn...

She had to do something other than sit her and go crazy. Something, anything, to keep herself from going insane with the waiting. And at the same time, she knew anything she did might not matter a bit...

So what? It was better than pretending to stretch. A workout was supposed to be relaxing, but that wasn't doing a thing at this point...time for something new. Like the library.

Kagome yanked the beads out of her pocket, and slipped outside, suddenly lost to the eyes of the world. She stepped out firmly, dodging scurrying servants carrying suitcases and provisions to the ship. The corridors, in places, resembled a kicked anthill. Kagome shook her head, and hurried on through, trying very hard to stay out of the way. Bumping into the wrong person was the last thing she wanted now. Sesshoumaru couldn't die...couldn't...but...

At last the library came into view. Kagome slipped inside, glad to escape into somewhere quite. A faint hint of dust still hung in the air, and Kagome was pleased to note she was the only occupant of the room. Everyone else was too busy today to have time for books. Good. She didn't need to worry about being found out, on top of her mounting concern for Sesshoumaru's life.

She made her way through the winding shelves, shaking her head. Every square inch was used, here. It wasn't messy, but it was rather cramped and, at one point, might have been considered cozy, with the right décor and less dust.

Kagome ducked into her own nook, and sighed softly as the papers she'd set aside yesterday evening came into view. Her breath caught. And...

Something else.

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Sesshoumaru watched Kagome leave, and frowned. She was nervous, he guessed. He could hear it plainly in her voice; she never could really hide what she felt. And right now, she was on the edge.

So was he, in a way. Every idea on how to win, every plan, any thought he had inevitably turned towards the duel. One day less. One day less to live, to laugh (though he did that seldom enough) and one less day to watch Kagome grow into her own powers. She had astonished him. She had a long, long journey yet, but one day...one day she would be an amazing miko.

He closed his eyes, and massaged his temples, a slight frown in place. He'd already been though this hundreds of times, through dozens of formal duels and countless fights. He couldn't see a way out, or how to win. The best outcome was Damia's death, if he but weakened her enough...

It wasn't a bad way to go, he tried to tell himself. He had very little to hold him here but duty. The people he cared anything for...

Rin was dead, though by now he had accepted it. In the normal course of things, if he wasn't that sure about his own rather low life expectancy, he would have been able to remember her with a smile in time, without the tight elastic bang of grief stretched over his heart.

The living... Kagome was here, and her family...he would see them once more, and say goodbye. They wouldn't need to know that it would be for the last time.

With some amazement, as he moodily thought of final farewells, he realized that he was actually going to miss Souta, with all his obsessive annoyances. And Sakura, and her father, even if he persisted in the recurring delusion that Sesshoumaru needed exterminating...

And Kagome. He'd miss her most of all. Sesshoumaru had never really allowed himself the luxury of a friend before, but now that he had... well. It was very hard to even imagine saying goodbye, or letting her go. But he had to, didn't he? He not only wanted to stop Damia, he _needed _to...and there was only one way.

He opened his eyes, and stared out across the faintly moonlit gardens, catching the glint of the koi pond out of the corner of his eyes. The newly risen moon floated on its surface, mocking him even though it was still pale with the sunset. The moon was strong, it seemed to say. The crescent waxed, and waned, but always came back. Clouds might cover it, but there would always be another clear night, another perfect circle set with stars.

He wasn't sure he would come back, rebound. In fact, he knew he wouldn't. Discomforting thoughts of the inevitability of success drifted though him, clouding the distant surface of the koi pond in regrets.

Failure.

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Kagome stared at the slim addition to her stack of what passed for 'research.'

Nervousness, anticipation, and a touch of hope made themselves known. What was it? Why was it here? And more importantly, what was _in_ it?

Carefully, she examined it. It looked as though it had fallen out of a shelf, on top of her own stuff. But somehow, she doubted that. It wasn't quite the same age as the material here, and looked well maintained. It wasn't dusty enough, either. Kagome wouldn't have noticed, except for her time sorting the contents of the storage rooms at the museum. Those subtle differences were enough to tell her it didn't belong. It was a plant.

She sat down, and ran over what she'd found last night to re-familiarize herself with the information, setting the new volume aside. Records, without much else to pad them out, on the miko Nadia Hirosaki and her 'companion' Arameki Sao. Nothing else. Depressing, and practically useless but for that one sentence on 'Bond.'

Cautiously, she glanced at the narrow book, picking it up by the binding and flipping it over, not daring to let the excitement coursing through her take hold. What if this was...?

The front and back were both blank of a title, and the corners dog-eared. At home, it might have been described in the catalog as 'slightly foxed.' Kagome ran her hands over the hardbound book, praying for luck, before opening it.

1284, 12th month of the year. Kagome narrowed her eyes at the suspicious looking date, glancing back at the dates on the payroll records. 1291 was when Nadia Hirosaki had been entered in the households records...added to the fact that this volume had most likely been planted this seemed...rather interesting. Her eyes scanned downwards, checking it out.

Blast. Not another journal! Kagome read on, and groaned aloud.

Yes. _It was a journal._

Shit.

At least this one was organized...Kagome opened the book, and prepared for a long-winded ramble on the weather in 1284, before she noticed the corner of one page was folded in. Like a bookmark...

Why not? Someone had left this, clearly. Why _else_ would Hirosaki's journal be here? She was fairy sure she'd gone through the places in this library it might have been kept, and had turned up nothing but stacks of soggy poetry. She wondered who had left it, before deciding it didn't matter. What was important was that it was here, now, and she could read it. Kagome raced ahead, excited.

"_We finally found it. After searching for so long, Sao and I found the right scrolls. I confess to being nervous; there is no going back. We'll be together, now, we'll be able to do what we've planned for so long, but...I am still nervous. This means leaving behind the people I know, one day, to stay with him. If you stay with youkai, it is said, humanity beings to pass you by..._

_I am nervous, but I will do it, because I want to. There is very little I leave behind. No family, no village to care for, and few friends. I will be happy, I know it._

_Must remember to polish silver dagger. Enunciate on second 'tsu' clearly. _

_But if something goes wrong, I trust Arameki."_

A sheet, covered in the fine, spider-like brush strokes fell out of the book when Kagome turned the page, withholding any judgments on what she'd found until she knew it. _All_ of it. If a bond to the unearthly youkai meant throwing away your own kind, what good was that? That couldn't be true, could it?

Kagome felt the faint stirring of an ominous cloud descend on her mind, darkening the thoughts racing though her skull. She might be wrong, might be very wrong, might be anxious over nothing...but that did not sound promising. It sounded more like what Mesau and Damia had cooked up than she wanted to admit! Wasn't this supposed to be something that would _help_...? Right...?

The loose paper had very little written on it, except for a few words to begin the ceremony, and an illustration of a pair of hands, palm to palm, a black well of ink trickling from each and winding down onto the bottom of the page, drop by drop, sealed with a final phrase. There were more careful notes about enunciation.

Kagome swallowed, as she read on. Something like that...was dangerous. Not because she was worried it wouldn't work (the next page was covered with 'It worked!' type statements, so that wasn't a worry) but because of the short, terse description of what it actually _did. _All the juicy details.

No wonder everyone kept hinting at blood magic around here. This wasn't just like what Mesau and Damia had been up to, a bond to make the sum of the parts greater in power, but a version of the same spell, modified only slightly. With something like that, they could hope to be on equal footing. The only real difference between the dark miko and the long dead one was the equality. Damia held Mesau's leash, but in this, there _was_ no collar...both sides came to the table equal.

Kagome felt slightly ill, thinking of how close to Mesau and Damia's pact it came, and shivered, slowly sitting up. She wanted nothing to do with the dark miko. She still found it hard to believe that a human, a _miko_, would willingly sign up to help youkai against her own people, though she had Tsubaki and Onigumo as evidence aplenty towards the depths to which people sunk.

It was very clear that something like that bond was not to be done unless you_ meant_ it. It wasn't something you could hope to undo, so you'd better be damn sure when you did it, it was what you really wanted.

Kagome frowned, and absently tucked the loose paper away. She wasn't nearly so sure she could help, now. All her earlier hopes had drained away, and she felt cheated, somehow. Sesshoumaru was a...a. friend. He'd never mentioned anything like that to her, nor that it might help. She wasn't surprised, even though she suspected he knew a lot about bonds anyway. H didn't want the bond, clearly. It wasn't just her own thoughts on the matter, though she had no idea what those even _were_, at this point. Her mind was such a turmoil...

She didn't know if she would be willing to give this much of herself away, if she even _could_. She didn't want him to die, but what of...of everything else? He had never mentioned, and surely he must have known...

He probably didn't want her hanging around his neck, weighing him down like a dead, stuffed albatross... he didn't want to have to put up with her for eternity, would _chose_ death...

Kagome shivered, and drew her feet up against her chest, wrapping her arms around, scared, though she couldn't put a name to why. She had given so much of her life to Inuyasha. She had wanted to stay with him, had wanted so very badly to be more than a shard detector, more than a faded mask of Kikyou...

He had never promised her anything in return, never said those three, special words she'd waited, in vain, to hear. His dieing breath had been for Kikyou, shattered to pieces only a few meters away. Kagome was scared to give anyone that much of herself again, especially when she was so unsure of the reception. Sesshoumaru might trust her, might be more than the cold mask the world at large saw, but did she really know him that well? He was youkai, Taiyoukai, creature of myth. He might have a hidden heart after all, and they might be friends. He might trust her.

But what did that really mean, in the long run? Kagome didn't know as much of Sesshoumaru as all that after all. She had never examined her own perceptions that deeply before.

But yet... she knew if she did nothing, Sesshoumaru would die. That wasn't an acceptable outcome, but the price...she couldn't!

As she thought of this, certainly crossed her soul, a premonition.

He _would_ die.

Unless she did something, that was the future, set in stone.

She knew it utterly, and the knowledge left a bitter taste in her mouth. Could she live with that, _knowing_ she could have changed it? Kagome shook her head, rocking in pace slowly, mind swimming with thoughts, with memories of golden eyes, one set of amber, one of molten sun. Her stomach clenched tightly, the thoughts building up until her mind went blank.

Slowly, she picked apart her own thoughts, carefully, holding a bundle of feathers in the shape of a bird. One wrong breath, and they would scatter...thoughts blown to the four corners.

How much did Sesshoumaru mean to her? He was a friend. A very good friend, considering how they had met. Kagome thought back to the day she'd found him again, thought back to the decision she had made then, though she didn't realize it. She had chosen to help him, rather than leave him as Inuyasha might once have done...

A choice she didn't regret, though occasionally she felt a faint pang of shame, for somehow failing Inuyasha. But the though of just leaving him there, the memory of him sprawled near deaths gates, usually calmed any lingering doubts. Kagome was a miko in her bones; her nature would never allow her to deny someone help, not unless they were completely beyond redemption in her eyes. Once, Naraku, and now Damia; those two she would never help.

Kagome's hands shook, and she took out the paper, eyes not moving. She knew what was on it, and simply held it up before putting it away, remembering belatedly that she wasn't, as Amiritsu, supposed to be here.

What should she do? What should she do? What _could_ she do? Kagome's thoughts chased each other in circles, startled and unsure. She knew how much it would mean to make a choice so final. She had made one not unlike it when she chose to stay in the past; the warring states era had eaten more of her life, in its way, than Inuyasha ever had. You could not give that much to a cause without truly feeling it was your life to become a time traveler. Or rather, not a time traveler, but a _miko_... And whatever else she was, Kagome was a miko born. She might not be the best, might never be, but she was still miko enough to _know _what she was.

She had had to be dedicated enough to accept the risks, the feeling of strangeness within her own skin, as she desperate searched for words to describe her battles, the victories, the fact that she had killed to save her life, to her mother, who didn't quite understand. It had carried her on when she felt the gap between her friends and her own life, girls with nothing more worrisome than the next sale on their minds. It hurt, being so different, being so detached...and knowing that there would never be a way to fix it, not really. You couldn't undo the past.

That was the real price.

Kagome shivered, and burred her head in her hands, close to tears. It was a perfect dilemma to her. Save someone who had become close, more than close, or live a half life...

She stopped, and sniffed, wiping an invisible hand across her eyes, glancing at the lanterns. They had been lit, at last, which meant dark was falling...

And as night rose to cover the sea, they would wash out with the tide. The boat was waiting. She couldn't sit here any longer. She had been packed since this morning, and all that remained was to get on the ship, with a short stop. Kagome's face twisted, reflecting the torn surface beneath, but she dared not delay for much longer.

Angrily, she wished she'd brought her watch.

Kagome stood up, and carefully replaced the records. The loose sheet was held, and the journal glanced at. Kagome wavered, but after long seconds had passed, abruptly tucked the paper inside her shirt, and laid the slender volume gently beside the shelf. Any guilt at taking the paper was ruthlessly squashed. Someone (and she had a good idea of who!) had left this. They wouldn't mind it being borrowed, surely.

And if they did mind, too bad. Pages scented in old apple blossoms fluttered, and closed.

Kagome smiled sadly at it. "It's not your fault what I learned. Even if reading this mushy poetry might have been better. And that's saying something." She gestured at the surrounding works, laughed tightly, and left the room, to snatch her bags and continue to the ship.

Rather like city buses, the tides of time waited for no one.

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Kagome rushed down the quay, and scrambled on board the boat, the small bag she'd grabbed from the room over her shoulder. She had, at last, learned to travel light, Kagome reflected. She hadn't really unpacked too much when they arrived anyway, knowing they wouldn't be here long and not liking to leave her bags lying about. She watched with numbed eyes the cheering crowd receded into the distance as the earth fell away, after the last of the people boarded. Sesshoumaru came to stand beside her.

She said nothing, and watched the crowd come to see their Lord and Lady off; to disappear into the water, and the night, and the coming storm.

On the shore, eyes watched the boat go. Some were set in cheering faces, while others were more concerned, thinking. Thoughtful. Or calculating.

Matsudaria left the crowd, and disappeared into town, steeps burning with urgency. She knew. She hadn't been able to see them until now, but there was no mistaking that pose, that blatantly missing arm. She _knew_. As a general in the Southern army, until her - abrupt dismissal – she had met with important people many times, particularly those from the west. Matsudaria might not be a general any more, but her mind was just as active as ever. Tosa was a fool...a Fellowship-loving fool...

She did not know who the Amiritsu woman was, but no matter. _He_ was enough. Someone had to be told, before he ruined everything. She had lost her position over her beliefs; sending a mere message was nothing now. She had been asked if she would help, and the answer had been an overwhelming yes. Matsudaria had a job to do.

Carefully, she shut her doors behind her, and beckoned the precious bird she had been given, now roosting by the window, closer.

She did not know what the Western domain would do. But they had to be told. They were the only hope left, if the youkai here were to have any chance at all against the far West; Rangaku, and the strange men with greed in their eyes, from many tiny countries itching for more land.

She watched, out the window, as the bird swiftly vanished, and the ship did the same.

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Kagome still had said nothing, when the shore disappeared completely into twilight. Sesshoumaru turned and left, after a quiet word about where their rooms were. Separate, this time. Kagome barely noticed.

She looked around the open ocean with dread in her eyes. Soon. She had to do something soon. She was the only one who could, it seemed. How strange, she thought, that the fate of an entire country rested with one half trained, inept miko. One far-fetched hope for success. She had to try... Something...

But _what_?

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_Momiji and Botan...I snitched those two minor characters from the story with Tsubaki. The two miko-in-training...lol. I only mention it because it took me forever to find out what the names were. I know, in canon, they learned to distinguish good and evil…but Damia might have other plans. Plotwise, here...things finally get going again. Lol. Beware the next round of angst!XD_

_Anyway...yeah. I tried to get this up sooner, because you guys have been so nice to me, and said such lovely things. (huge grin) Thank you for all the support! I enjoy writing this, but you people provide that extra bit of motivation needed to get it done that much faster. XD Thanks!_


	30. ch29:Tempest

**:: Tempest ::**

Kagome watched the darkness closed in behind them, shutting away the shore and the world beyond in a wall of shadow and mist, the play of smoke and mirrors on the water around the ship flickering in the lamplight, and the last echoes of the dieing sun.

The ship cut a steady wake through the water, and bustling shapes on the edge of vision went about their tasks, keeping the tiny oval of the vessel afloat. Kagome wasn't interested in watching their efforts; her only thought was of this space to be alone, and mull over things, as the crew worked around her. Her eyes stared out across the water, blank depths churning with anxiety, a montage of trepidation.

Below, dinner was being served on board; Kagome wasn't quite sure why this was so, but it was. Personally, she thought it would have been easier to eat on shore, but there was something to do with the tides, apparently, and this was when they had to leave...she was no sailor, so she'd not questioned further. So dinner was on the boat. Everyone was treating it was the air of a picnic, she thought sourly. Somehow, going down and laughing at fake jokes didn't appeal.

Sesshoumaru had disappeared below, along with most of the entourage not actually _running_ the boat. Kagome stayed above, despite the savory scents wafting from the dinning room. For some reason, her appetite had quite disappeared, and she didn't even venture down for food, skipping the party. Instead, she hung over the side of the railing like an overgrown bat, mulling over things and generally feeling awful.

She felt sick inside, and it wasn't just the damn boat crashing into the waves in gut wrenching fashion. The thought of Sesshoumaru dieing – unless she did something, which...well...she didn't know what to think about _that_ – left a hollow pit of bile in her throat. She leaned over the side, wondering if maybe it was seasickness after all, but decided that it wasn't.

Damn. Seasick might have been preferable to the tight collar of dread around her neck, and the hollow echo in her heart. It was far more easily cured, for one thing.

She kept thinking, over and over, that he would die. He _would_. He didn't appear to be terribly interested in saving his own skin, either, if this was the way he was approaching that last battle. Why...? The Sesshoumaru she had known would never have let something get him down like that...

Kagome was not given to foresight, but occasionally, she had feelings, premonitions. They had never been wrong. She wished, just once, that she _was_ wrong, that he wouldn't die, but knew she would be lying to herself; she'd known in a way that could not be taken back, forgotten.

She knew.

Kagome shivered, and looked up from the dark oily water, out into the matte black night. It looked...empty. So few stars were out, not like some evenings. Sometimes, it was as if an entire field of fireflies had been set loose in the sky, bright and colorful, rivaling the moon for brilliance. The feudal era was beautiful, a fierce beauty all the more striking set against the violence, and horrors she had seen here. The stars were so clear, here, untouched. Not like home. Not like tonight.

Home...

Gods, she wanted home right now. Home, something hot to drink, a blanket, and, most of all, her _mom_. Kagome felt lost, and alone in a way she hadn't in a long time. Not since Inuyasha had died, not since the day she had first fallen into the unknown mists of time, unsure of what had happened and not knowing if she'd ever return to her own world...

Logically, she was old enough to know that her mother, so often the champion of childhood fears, wouldn't be able to help her with this. Sakura Higurashi was a brave woman, but her experience didn't extend to power hungry youkai, politics in general, or screaming people coming at you with sharp pointy objects. But if only...if only Kagome could stuff her head in the sand, and believe it was all okay...

Kagome shook her head, and tried to snap out of it. This was not helping the situation. She had to come up with a plan, since Sesshoumaru didn't appear to have one other than 'charge in, die, everyone becomes mysteriously happy.'

What plan did she have?

Kagome shook her head again, and grimaced. _Exactly_ what plan was a good point - there wasn't one. She didn't even know her own mind, let alone what to do...but somehow, between now and their arrival in Aizu in only a matter of days, she had to come up with something.

Well...that wasn't true. Not exactly. She didn't have a plan, but she had a place to start. And it wasn't in assuming defeat before it even happened. Kagome wasn't going to give up. She shivered again, and rubbed at her arms.

Sesshoumaru...he was a good place to begin. Even if she made up her mind one way or the other, (and she hadn't, not yet...this was not a decision to be made lightly...) she hadn't touched the subject with him since her discovery. She had a good idea of his reaction if she said something, but she still had to ask. She might not have a plan, but that was a direction, at least.

Something to try. Kagome stared moodily at the moon, and thought of blue crescents, and untouchable stars.

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Below, Satsuma frowned a the empty place beside Sesshoumaru, and noticed the small crease in Sesshoumaru's forehead, faintly visible under the blue crescent. How unlike him to worry over the absence of one small girl; he'd always made it a personal point never to become attached to anyone, especially mortals, and above all, female ones.

At least it was now Sesshoumaru himself she was looking at, she reflected, relieved to be able to see him properly once again without the mask of 'Joseibi.' Maybe he'd start acting more like his old self again. Or perhaps not...he might come to understand their own views better, this way. Perhaps...

The only people not trusted and employed by Tanuma on this boat were the sailors, and there was no way for them to communicate any information they had been told_ after_ leaving the docks, now. There was no reason to hide his identity, Tanuma had assured them. They were, after all, in the middle of the ocean, and would not put in till they were closer to this mysterious…village, where Kagome lived, and Tetsusaiga had been left.

Satsuma had raised her eyebrows at that little tidbit, and had tried to press for more information. She had not been aware that Kagome lived there; could Sesshoumaru tell her about it?

Strangely, he had been rather evasive about both Kagome's home, and the exact whereabouts of the sword, stressing that only he would go to collect it, instead of getting someone to get it for him, which would have been simpler.

Privately, Satsuma's curiosity had been raised. She had pointed this interesting information out to Tosa, and Tanuma, and the three of them had decided on a discrete guard for Sesshoumaru and Kagome. They did not need trouble, this close to a possible victory – and it _would_ be nice to see the mysterious girls home. Tanuma in particular seemed to feel it was a personal point of honor to discover her secrets, she'd kept them hidden for so long. Nothing like a challenge...

Across the table, Tosa was sprawled in a slightly undignified heap beside the ramrod back of Sesshoumaru, and was currently attempting to tell him a story about hunting from a few years back. He was waving his arms with great enthusiasm, narrowly avoiding spilling his drink.

Sesshoumaru wasn't really paying attention to the annoying ramble beside him - he was more preoccupied with the silence where there should have been laughter. Kagome might have enjoyed the discussion, if she was here. She was always laughing, it seemed. Where was she?

He remembered she had been unusually restless today, and he had thought it was simply anxiousness, and nerves. Now, he was wondering what on earth was going on, if there wasn't more to it than that. It wasn't like Kagome to miss dinner...and he had wanted to be able to enjoy his few remaining nights in good company, before he walked into the ring with head raised high, and did not come out. The tip of his tail twitched, ever so slightly, showing in minute amount how frustrated he was. What was wrong?

Was she really that nervous? He did not remember her as one given to too much fretting over preparations. She'd liked charging in, and had mostly been lucky enough to walk away afterwards. What was wrong, if not that? He was the one who should be nervous...Kagome...

He closed his eyes briefly, and endured in stiff silence the rest of dinner. He had thought he'd enjoy being able to tear away the mask of Joseibi, at least for a brief space before their arrival, but it was a victory in name only. Stubborn pride kept him sitting at the table, the confining last dinner party, wondering about Kagome, and limited to the role of guest.

Satsuma and Tosa had extended him every proper curtsy as soon as he'd become known as Sesshoumaru. While he appreciated the thought, he really wasn't in the mood for a formal setting. The stares from the sailors had died away, and Tosa's people had known his real identity for long enough that the novelty had worn away, but it was still wearing to be gazed at as though one was a ghost, come back to haunt the living.

Well, living for now, at any rate. The barest wisp of a self deprecating smile passed over his face, and Sesshoumaru brushed it away. The thought of death hung over everything, touched every thought, and he hated it, hated the fact he couldn't escape it. He still hadn't really resigned himself to his fate. He kept wishing that there was a loophole, somewhere, that he could take.

Perhaps he should take Kagome up on her suggestion of a lawyer...?

Sesshoumaru supposed he could still let the whole thing drop, go away, live out his days in peace. The thought hadn't really crossed his mind before. He knew he couldn't win, was convinced wholly of that, and Tosa and Satsuma believed him. After all, they had never faced Damia, while he had. They took his word for it.

But to run - that would be unbearable. He couldn't run for pride, and he couldn't fight to win, even though he was the stronger youkai; he knew it. He would do what he had too, now that he'd worked himself into a self imposed box of rules.

Fighting was a normal reaction; the living fought against death till the end, and only rarely, very rarely, could they summon the grace to not struggle. Slightly undignified, but Sesshoumaru still strained against his own fate.

He_ knew_ he couldn't win, yet here he was, bound and determined to try...

A fair fight…if this had only been a fair, honest,_ honorable_, fight. Sesshoumaru could have won, could have…! In a world of rules, and honor, he knew exactly where he was; in this mess of snakes, he didn't. The truth was, without her stooping to using Mesau and changing the rules, he could have bested Damia. It might have been a close thing, but he felt _sure_ he could have...

Perhaps Kagome's mood, whatever had caused it, was affecting him, now. Or perhaps it was the other way around; he had been depressing company recently. He hadn't said why, of course, and hoped that she hadn't noticed. He did not want to have the last few days with friends coloured by bad memories, and overtly emotional tears.

The minutes dragged on; how strange that he, who should be treasuring this last bit of life, wished for nothing more than dinner to hurry on up and be over with.

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At last, the earliest possible time he could excuse himself and retire rolled around. Sesshoumaru stood up gracefully, and bowed to his gracious hosts, thanking them with half a mind on the words. He retreated to his room, and sat in a meditative way on the bed. He could tell Kagome was next door; small noises and footsteps betrayed her presence. At some point, she must have gotten too cold to stay outside, he guessed, and had come below.

He let his arm rest in his lap as the minutes once again began to ooze by slowly. Now that the opportunity was available to talk, he found he couldn't move to get up, and walk two steps over to Kagome's room. He wanted to find out what was going on, concern and curiosity mixed together...and was too afraid, too stiff to ask first. His fingers twitched, but Sesshoumaru couldn't seem to make himself move to get up. He curled his fingers in anger, trying to overcome that fear of failure without success. He'd almost rather take Damia over telling Kagome something potentially...musshy.

What was preying on her mind...? Sesshoumaru had tried to protect her, in his own way, from what was to come. She did not need to be in the middle of such things, did not need to know; he wanted her to stay happy as long as possible. She should be happy...she deserved it. He didn't know when he would say goodbye. He didn't want to do it, didn't want to even though he knew he should...

He'd thought he'd taken care to keep her uninformed of the consequences of this journey; why should she be upset?

He wished he had the courage to ask that one, simple thing...

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Next door, Kagome was sitting against the wall, a sharp contrast to the tidy room of Sesshoumaru. Her bag had been dropped, and the contents had already been strewn about slightly, as she searched for the precious bit of paper tucked in there not more than a few hours ago. It hung from her fingers, the thick black brush strokes sucking in the scarce light of the tiny cabin. The limp figure sprawled against the wall stared into space, knees tucked in close for warmth. The cold night air was what had finally driven her inside.

She wondered idly when Sesshoumaru would be back, and listened. Quiet desperation, grasping at straws…she hoped she'd be able to say what she wanted without stopping, without loosing her nerve. He had to know; that was the thought she couldn't get out of her head. He should know all about the blood bonds, and what one would entail, before they arrived in the village and returned home, he for the sword, she for her family. He had to know that there was still a way to win, that they might still pull through on blind luck. Hey, she'd always gotten lucky before, hadn't she...?

She read through the paper once again. The picture had not changed. A crudely drawn woman in miko's uniform, and a youki of some sort pressed their hands together, the cut across both palms dripping down their arms and falling, mingled, to the ground. Words were written elegantly beneath the picture, and above, words that should be said as the knife was wielded, and the palms clasped, spoken together, and one after the other. Kagome whispered them to herself, sub-vocalizing the spell.

It should have been barbaric looking, but Kagome was no longer horrified by the picture. It was the thought...the thought of what, precisely? Rejection, and trying herself to something she could not escape. Kagome was afraid to be drawn into something she did not understand, someone she did not know, someone she did not know how she felt about, or know how he felt about her.

She was afraid of that, and wary of something that sounded so primitive in nature, and so close to what Mesau and Damia had been up to. She did not think Sesshoumaru would ever abuse the privilege, theoretically speaking, but she had no desire to be at the mercy of his slightest whim. Even if the author had said 'it worked!' Kagome wasn't -quite- sure of her own ability. Suppose she screwed up?

Kagome closed her eyes, concentrating on the lack of noise next door. Finally, she gave up on listening, and peeked out the door. Perhaps if her ears were as good as an inu-youkai's, she might be able to tell if he was back by ear-power alone, but as it was, she'd have to get up and look.

Kagome swallowed softly as she saw the room was occupied; a shadow was just visible though the screens. She hadn't heard him come back at all, then. She stood outside the door hesitantly for a long moment, before tossing fate to the winds. She knocked, and, in the same breath, let herself in. It had to be done, and she was the only one who knew this...or knew she knew, which was the same thing.

"Sesshoumaru?"

Kagome frowned in puzzlement at the restored image of Sesshoumaru, sitting elegantly in place. Oh, yes...she had forgotten that he was able to reveal himself a bit, now that there were no spies about, and no crows. For some reason, recent events had driven all such pleasant thoughts from her mind. For some reason, the sight of him sitting there, the same as she had seen him so many years ago (save for the arm...) was reassuring. If he wanted to, couldn't he summon the same willpower again...?

"Kagome?" One eyebrow lifted delicately, as though to ask why she was here. Under that pinning stare, Kagome fidgeted, the sell broken, and memories of their months together surfacing in her mind. No; this was a different Sesshoumaru, one who had been sealed for too long. She knew it, even if he'd never mentioned the fact, and might not even know consciously. Something had changed, then. Something had changed...

"I...I...wanted to ask..."

'Go on,' the eyebrow seemed to say. 'I'm listening, for now.'

"I wanted to ask you about your family!" Kagome bit out in a rush, voice slightly squeaky. Inwardly, she cursed. That had _not _been what she was going to say, at_ all_...this was not going how she wanted, not at all...pinpricks of embarrassment crept up her neck, staining it red.

Sesshoumaru blinked, surprised. He had not expected that question; she had seemed to be on the verge of something else, something important, if he was any judge of character. And Sesshoumaru prided himself on being able to read others fairly well; Kagome was an open book, at times, though at others she was painfully opaque.

"I did not know my father very well when I was young; He was always off fighting. My mother looked after me, when she wished to spare time from her own life. But that is not what you wanted to know, is it?" Sesshoumaru's stare intensified, as he thought back briefly to mothers infernal flute; she'd gone to Aizu, once, long ago, and had never come back...he'd forgotten it. Like mother, like son...

Kagome sighed, letting out a slow breath. "No. I...well...it's about...it's about some way to help! I wanted to help you win. I want to help you survive and _live_, Sesshoumaru. I don't want you to die when we get to Aizu! You might have given up, but I haven't!" It all came out in a rush, unplanned, words and thoughts bare to the world.

Sesshoumaru blinked, and said nothing, though inwardly, a distinct feeling of trepidation snaked thorough his thoughts. So, she had guessed...well, it had always been a possibility. And he_ should_ have told her; he should have. He just hadn't had the courage...

What did she mean he'd given up? He hadn't! If he'd wanted to give up, he'd have tried to commit seppuku, or would have laid down and died. Sesshoumaru might have been angry with her, if he wasn't preoccupied with what she had just said.

Angry with an entirely different source – himself - , Sesshoumaru gave himself a mental kick. He should have had the decency to tell her he did not expect to live the week; she was one of the few people he would regret leaving behind...and yet...he hadn't said anything.

He had been afraid. Afraid to lose her before...before...he would anyway...

He had been afraid before this. In many ways he still was, and always would be. Courage came from overcoming that fear; he had been - Sesshoumaru winced, slightly- a coward. Him, a coward! Guilt, and shame descended like a cloud, wafting their subversive smoke though his thoughts. He should have told her first!

Even if she had accused him of giving up...!

"I'm...sorry, that didn't come out right. It's just...that...I found some way that might help, only... it's a bit scary...and I don't know what to do about it." Her voice broke, slightly, and dipped and rose with feeling. Wordlessly, Kagome held out the ragged scrap of paper, eyes closed.

"Here. I don't know what to think. But you deserve to know, at least. If you didn't already." She opened her eyes and they seemed to look at something very far away. Silently, Sesshoumaru took the tiny, damning writing, and glanced at it; one look was enough to tell him what it was.

His eyes widened a fraction. So she'd found out about that too, had she? He knew exactly what would come next, then. And he did not like it one bit. Here he'd finally manged to find out what was bothering her...and not due to his own efforts, either; he'd been unable to do even that simple thing...

"Did you know? About...this? Blood bonds, and so on?"

He closed his eyes. "Yes. I knew."

He waited for the explosion, but it never came. Instead, a small voice, brittle and washed of colour, began to speak. He knew he fully deserved a tongue lashing. He even, in some odd way, felt one was _owed_ him for being so thoughtless, so inconsiderate. But that soft, hoarse voice was infinitely worse.

He probably deserved that, too.

"And you didn't tell me. You never told me what was on your mind; that's why you've been so mopey recently, I bet. You never_ said_. You never said you knew you were going to die. There was a way to save you, and you never..." She wouldn't say her heart was breaking. That was purely over the top dramatics. But it felt hollow, twisted up in knots, and tight.

How could someone say to your face they were headed off to death, and were not going to tell you, let you _help_ them? He'd know how to save himself! Why hadn't he asked her, at the least? Was he that unwilling to look for others help? Mortal help? Was it really that different, now...?

She'd never thought of Sesshoumaru as suicidal before, but...was he _blind_? Was he blind to how much that would hurt her, and how little it might achieve, in the end, when there was a solution? He should have asked her, even if it would have been hard. She wasn't sure even now what her answer might be. But to hide it...! It wasn't the best fix, but...

She was being selfish, but how could she be blamed? Who could decry her for wanting to help, for wanting to hold on? She couldn't let this happen, couldn't...didn't know if she could bear to stand the solution...

Kagome was crying, now. He'd known, and he never told her! Never! She'd thought...she'd thought...Why? Why not? Was she not important enough to know? Did he want to save her the bother of it all? He shouldn't have done that, should have told her should have said there was a way to _save_ his sorry ass...

Through the tears, Kagome was beginning to get _angry_.

And Sesshoumaru still said nothing, though deep in his eyes, regrets collected like snow, piling up.

Why not? Was she that unimportant, was he that self centered, that eager for revenge, or death, or...? Did he not know what it would _mean _to her, to march off without so much as a by your leave, and just up and get himself killed!? It wasn't as though the world needed more martyrs! It wouldn't do anything, it would just be pointless, and stupid, and...it would hurt. A lot.

Kagome didn't know quite what she thought after the roller coaster of emotions she'd been riding on all day. But she knew it would be just like Inuyasha over again...it had hurt so _much _to lose someone young, someone close, someone who should have had many more years to grow, to change, to _be, _to be _with_...she never wanted to feel that again. Was it that wrong, that selfish, to want to never have to let go?

Maybe it was.

She didn't care.

"Fine! I wanted to help. You didn't..." Anger coloured her voice, but it was still not a shout. Not yet. Kagome was well aware that if there was anything to be heard, Tanuma would be there with his ears wide open. He simply stuck her as that sort of person, who had to know simply for the sake of having the information. She didn't want him to hear this, if it could be avoided. Normally his nosiness was tolerable, but to have him here, listening at the keyhole to something so private, was wrong. Wrong, wrong, wrong...

No shouting. She couldn't lose her temper. She wasn't sure if she wanted to shout, or cry some more...

"Kagome. I..." Sesshoumaru closed his eyes again, and wished the world was back the way it was, before Kagome had arrived and dropped the world out from beneath his feet. Why couldn't he have said something, before it was too late, and she'd known already...? Why did she have to be so _smart_...?

He felt terrible, and knew she had to feel just as bad, which, in turn, made him feel worse. Sesshoumaru blinked, and said words rarely spoken by him, meaning them more than he ever had. "I'm sorry."

He'd never meant them so much, before, never wished he could say something more before, but he did, he did, and try though he might, everything else died in his throat, too silly, too personal, too wrong to say. Again: "I'm sorry," louder, clearer, just as heartfelt. Sesshoumaru wanted to sink into the floor. He wished he could do something to make it up to her, but he couldn't He wasn't about to tell her she could try saving his sad soul with that bond, would not allow it, if that was what she was about to suggest. He had wanted to save her the pain...but in the end, he couldn't move on his position. He just _couldn't_. It was impossible...

Kagome glared, eyes daggers that dashed the apology to the rocks. She didn't trust herself to say anything more, for fear she'd start shouting, and wouldn't stop.

Her younger self _would_ have shouted. There would have been many more tears, a 'sit' or two, and angry, half-meant words. But she didn't do any of those things. She was older, though she didn't feel wiser. She knew what loss was; and she knew when someone was set, however wrongly, in her eyes, on a particular course. Sesshoumaru was as unmovable as the sea; he shifted, but always back to the place he left. She could see it in his eyes, that he regretted, but would not change. Because he couldn't. Not and still be Sesshoumaru.

"I know." She knew too, that he was sorry, that he knew as well as she did he would not, could not, veer from this path. It was only a whisper, but she knew he'd hear.

She wanted so much to say something, anything. But she couldn't. He...was an adult. Older than her, for sure. She wasn't going to change his mind; she knew without the indignity of fighting over it.

Why make his...last...days...filled with fighting, and accusations? It would do nothing. Kagome knew that intellectually. She would look back later, she thought in a detached way, and wonder why she had spent what time remained fighting. She would regret that as much as being helpless to stop it. Her head knew. Emotionally...

She was screaming inside, every instinct trying for the hope that she could help, that she could prevent it if she tried hard enough, that the miko inside would save him...

Except he didn't want to be saved.

Sesshoumaru watched her stand just inside the doorway for a long, long time, trying to voice what she thought, trying to find the words. Things half seen flickered across her face, and he watched, not sure what to think. He was wrong, he knew, not to tell her. He knew he was not wrong in trying to keep her safe. Did she understand? Please...it was more than he deserved, but... he watched, as she struggled for a way to say what she wanted to.

But for some things, there just aren't words; the things used to describe emotions inevitably grow cliche, and fall flat against reality. The seeming and real of emotion are all one, on paper and in words.

He could see the truth, though. He could see it in her eyes. That would never change.

He watched as she struggled through the ideas, as he tried, and failed, to say what he wanted to as well. How could he apologize for something like that? He wanted to, wanted to explain, to try...

It wasn't because she wasn't important. She was the most important person in the world, right now. He hated politics; they added so much unnecessary bother. He had wanted to protect her from knowledge of this as long as he dared. Kagome was free of his own life, his mistakes, his troubles. It did not feel right to leave them on her doorstep. It was not right to torment her with the knowledge of something so privative and binding as blood. She'd not needed to have that piled on those thin, burdened shoulders.

"Sesshoumaru...just...tell me. Would you change your mind? Tell me where that proud youkai went?" He could tell she still hoped, vainly, that he might let her help him, in her eyes. He hated so much to disappoint that, but hated even more to catch her up into something she couldn't escape. He didn't think she would truly realize what it would mean until it was too late to be tied to him so surely.

"No." He sighed. "I am right here. And I am sorry, Kagome. I truly am. I didn't want you to be caught in this." Where he went? Nowhere...Sesshoaurmu was puzzled, but ignored it.

He didn't want her to be thrust naked into the world of backstabbing, or power, of those who used and left you to dry in the sun. He wanted to protect her from himself.

Especially himself.

He could never tie her to himself as she had said, before, could never hold her to him with something so ugly as blood. Even something with good intentions...he would never do it. Winning would not come at the cost of her freedom; death would come before that unhappy hour.

Most especially from himself...

He watched as Kagome closed her eyes and then, let out a long breath, face suddenly. calm, as though she had reached a state where she could do nothing but accept, watch, and act when the time was ready. A place beyond emotions...

"Alright. I...understand. I don't _like_, but I understand. But remember – if you ever decide you want my help, in any way...even that way...I will do whatever it takes."

She smiled sadly, and turned, but before she left, looked back one last time. "I made a decision a long time ago, Sesshoumaru. I don't know if it's right, or wrong... but I'm sticking with it."

And then, she walked out the door.

Once in her own room, she sat, and cried, arms wrapped around herself for a thin scarp of false comfort.

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Sesshoumaru stared at the closed door for a long, long time. What decision did she mean? And why...why did she think he had changed, somehow? He was the same as he had always been.

Wasn't he?

Would he have been so fatalistic, once? He didn't know; at her parting words Kagome's face had been unreadable, save for the part about her help being there, if he ever changed his mind. She had meant _that_ with her bones. He'd been shaken to realize how deeply that sentiment went; how could he accept something like that, or deserve it?

His mind would not stop spinning in circles. He'd thought himself ...if not prepared, at least as good as it was going to get. He knew he could stop, could hide, could escape, could live. He wanted to. Oh, how he wanted to! Kagome was more tempting than she knew.

But something stopped him. Honor. Integrity. He wouldn't stoop to taking away her freedom to save his own life. He could not back down, or he would deny all he was. Then, he _would_ be different, changed, and not in a good way.

He'd go out as a failure, as one who had been unable to find a popper solution, but none could take honor away from him. He would die with his head held high. By now, he could even think it without too much problem. He'd grown used to the idea, though this latest event sent tremors thorough the carefully built tower of cards. It was simply self justification...he knew it, deep down. And he still couldn't bring himself to stop it. He didn't want to die, no. Bu what else was there? There was nowhere to go, no way off the slippery slope but down.

And through it all, he could only hold to one truth, one pervasive, odd little thought.

If only...if only he was Joseibi again...

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_Woo. Pure, heavy angst. Hopefully, not_ too_-out-of-character angst. Lol. And that, my friends, answers the questions of blood bonds. I can't tell you enough how much I appreciated all the reviews from last chapter. I loved reading through them, especially the ones that pointed out area's where I could have done better - and there were a number of those. (Which, strange as it sounds, makes me really, really happy.) _

_I know I didn't reply to all the reviews that were sent, but...Thank you! A HUGE thankyou! ) You guys rock! I even updated more or less on time, too! Yay!_


	31. ch30:Psychopomp

**:: Psychopomp ::**

Through the night, Kagome lay on her side and stared at the wall, at the blurred, out of focus splinters so close to her nose. Her thoughts whirled around the black ink strokes of the single, damning paper, remembering the light of a lamp on magenta stripes, the not-quite argument of the night before, and the overwhelming tiredness that spread through every limb. Her mind was ired, heavy, filled to overflowing with thoughts of her last conversation with Sesshoumaru, the promise she'd made, and meant.

In the back of her mind, she wondered where the indomitable spirit of Sesshoumaru had gone. He seemed defeated before the fight began, almost...as though he was already psychologically convinced of Damia's ability to win. Where was the proud youkai lord she'd known...? Why couldn't he save himself? Did he _want _to die...?

If he wouldn't lift a finger to save himself, she would still try. If he wouldn't help her think of a way to fight back, she'd have to come up with that plan herself...

She had been counting on him being there to help, she realized, and that had prevented her from coming up with something on her won. She had counted on him... Just as she had once depended on Inuyasha, and Sango, Miroku...if she didn't have a plan, they did. They were older, experienced; they had protected her. And now, she was alone. Sesshoumaru wouldn't, or couldn't, do it. That left her. Time to grow up a bit more, perhaps... Gods, she was so tired...

And yet, she could not sleep. Her eyes burned too much. At some point, she must have gotten changed into sleepwear, but she could hardly remember. Her memory was as blurred and out of focus as her eyes.

At some point last night, she had reached a decision, though she was hardly aware of having made it until the words left her mouth: If it came down to it, she would use the knowledge that lay not a hands breadths away, beside her, locked in ink. She did not know why this was her decision, did not know the whole of the reasons behind it. It could not be love, though she'd admit to feelings of some sort. (why else would she offer, agree to it? There must be something of affection there...)

This was nothing like what she had felt for Inuyasha, but not quite what one would expect of a friend. Kagome didn't know why, only that it felt...right, in a way she had never experienced before.

Even so, she doubted she would be given the chance to act on her promise. Words, and pledges were cheep, when you knew they would never be used. It was nearly a lie, a truth told to comfort her own conscience. She had offered; that was all she could do.

But was it, really?

There must be something, something she could have done before now, some way she could have changed things... She would always wonder if, perhaps there was something, some small thing, the key to the butterfly wings that would have changed fate. She wondered already, about the jewel, about Inuyasha, if there was something she had done wrong that might have saved her wayward hanyou, might have saved so many others from the jewel's chaos. It was something that gnawed away on her mind in the middle of the night, when there was no one there and she was alone. Like now. If only...if onlyies, and the road not taken, are the bane of late night soul searching, for they cut the deepest.

Kagome blinked again, not sure what time it was or even if the dawn had come at last. Would the sun never rise? She was so tired of the dark, of the jarring rocking of the ship, of the lies...

If not lies, it was partial truths, and secrets. She wished she had known, wished Sesshoumaru had told her of his kamikaze mission. Why did he seem bent so closely on self destruction? If he'd only admit there was something yet to be done, stop being so fatalistic, if they all seemed less certain of the invincibility of Damia... if _Sesshoumaru_ did, really, for they were relying on his information. Kagome had never even met the ill reputed Damia.

She couldn't readily forgive that ill kept secret of his, even though Kagome had made that offer. And meant it, moreover; you couldn't say the words without committing your whole heart to that promise, couldn't offer to hand over half your life without thinking, meaning, understanding how it would change you, both of you, and accepting it. Hell or high water, if Sesshoumaru accepted that blood bond, she'd do her part gladly. But he wouldn't... she knew that too, as sure as she knew that he'd die without it. He wouldn't...

The ship rocked, and Kagome shivered, chilled and alone in the dark, not sure of the destination or where they were, not sure of anything in her life. Comfort lay in the thought of home, but even that was colored over with memories. She had to stop thinking on this, couldn't let it taint everything in her mind, couldn't fret about the bond.

_He _was there, now. Before, Inuyasha had been the sole part of the past to intrude into modern day Japan. Her friends, the feudal enemies, the youkai who had wished her dead...it was washed out and pale if she tried hard enough to distance herself from the pain. But he was still there, vibrant, real. There were memories there, and for all that Sesshoumaru had been a constant for little over two months, she felt as though he had always been there. Waiting.

Kagome didn't know what to think anymore. Guilt picked at her thoughts, reminding her of Inuyasha's dislike of Sesshoumaru, of the impossibility of leaving her sometime-enemy to die, long ago in a museum far, far away.

Perhaps that was what had started it all. Kagome's thoughts wandered over their recent past together, sleep fuzzing the edges enough so that it all made a half awake sort of sense, in the twilight between primordial dark and the rational day.

Chocolate, and dreams...she hadn't known then either, she reflected; Sesshoumaru simply did not share what went though his head. She wondered what had caused those fears, the nightmares. What had they been about? Perhaps it was the mere memory of being buried alive, of the feeling, taste, of dirt in your mouth, and the weight of the world on your chest.

Enough to give _anyone_ nightmares if dwelt on for too long.

Maybe that was why he had changed. She wished, wished she'd known, that she had guessed before. Why couldn't she read minds? There would be a useful miko ability. Too bad such only existed in the imagination.

Not that real miko were more than myths to most people, of course...Kagome smiled wryly. Who was she to talk? She walked with youkai. No one else would believe _her. _Why not a mind reading miko?

Why couldn't people tell one another things? The things they really meant, really felt, really _were_. As well wish for world peace, she supposed, while she was at it. So much of a person was lived in their head, away from everyone else, and the only way to properly see perspective was from the side, from the inside, from an infinite array of views. In a nutshell; impossible.

Even if Sesshoumaru had sat down and told his life story, she wouldn't have known the answers to so many of the reasons that made up who he was. She could only feel the general shape of him, not personal motive, only facts. A shape defined by what wasn't, perhaps, every memory defining more of the real shape, but still leaving a hole with an unknown space.

The ship rocked, and jolted her awake, pressing the wood of the cabin abruptly into her face. Kagome gingerly felt her scalp, and sighed, before settling back into the dark. Blindly, she reached for the crackle of the paper, and tucked it close to her heart, a strange, treasured token of trust.

Would dawn never come?

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Next door, Sesshoumaru wasn't having much luck at sleep either. Thoughts not only of worry, concern for Kagome, but rising panic at the inescapable fate he'd created for himself made the domain of Morpheus as impossible to touch as the stars.

Why had he not told her? Guilt was a healthy dose added to the stew in his brain. Sesshoumaru wished he'd had the courage to say something. What was it Kagome had said, or repeated, once? All is not lost - the unconquerable will, and study of revenge, immortal hate... And courage never to submit or yield. He wished he had the ability to continue, despite the odds, a lone figure against the world. He'd thought he was brave, once – now he knew otherwise, didn't he? Sesshoumaru privately thought Kagome might be right. He would not have given in so easily, once. But...he still, even knowing that, could not find a way out of the hole he'd dug himself.

He had never said anything to Rin before she had died. Never said how much he loved to watch her enjoy life, and rip it up by the roots in the form of muddy blooms, never said, never said; her life was an unsung silence.

That was the deepest regret of all, in his life.

Death had never touched him so directly before. Over the years, he had been so distant, detached, that it had never made any impression on him. Perhaps this first close brush was all the harsher, for that. He resolved not to make the same mistake twice. He had nearly made it last night, might have lost so very easily Kagome's friendship. It terrified him, how close he has come to that, how close he still might come.

And that friendship meant the world to him, he realized upon reflection. He knew he needed her...he needed her so very much; she was the only thing that had ever shown him that he could be something, perhaps, that was just a little more...

He was suddenly acutely aware of how delicate that bond really was. As fragile as words, as butterfly wings, as a single life...and aware of how much he wanted to hold onto Kagome. He had never fully admitted it before, but he found, now, at the end of all things, that he could not do without the intoxicating, strange, precious young woman who'd so rudely shoved her way into is mind, commanding so many of his thoughts...and he didn't even mind it!

Fragility made that delicate bond all the more precious, he found. Value was in the knowing you could lose, in the shadow to define light...

He couldn't afford to lose her. Not like Rin.

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Morning came, not fast enough, and somehow too early. It started with the discrete knocking of the morning wakeup call at Sesshoumaru's door.

Kagome heard the noise, and turned over, eyes not really registering the shape of her room yet, orbs still fixed on inner thoughts. Then, her own door was knocked at. Kagome groaned, and, grudgingly, raised her head. It was still too early, and she was so tired...she doubted she'd sleep if she lay here for long, but it might be nicer than socializing. Hide and forget anything bad was going to happen. Maybe she could fantasize she was on some sort of medieval cruise trip...

"Yes?"

"Lady miko, breakfast is served."

Kagome groaned again, and tried to ignore the world. Maybe there was a continental buffet on the cruise ship...?

She wanted nothing more than to say 'Oh it is, is it? How nice. Wake me when it's over.' but maybe that wasn't the best idea...Satsuma and Tosa might be offended, and she genuinely liked them. Even if Tosa had been far too entertained for his own good by the previous rooming arrangements...

"Lady Kagome?"

"Yes, yes. Coming. As soon as I can." Kagome grumbled a bit more to herself, but grudgingly admitted that the world went on, whatever she wanted. The night of brooding had ended, and dawn, along with breakfast, had announced its arrival.

Lovely.

More groaning, after the discovery that while _she_ hadn't gone to sleep, her legs_ had_, and then she finally managed to get dressed, and stumble out of her cabin looking more or less decent. She tucked the Shikon under her shirt as she walked towards breakfast, and folded the precious paper next to it. Green hakama swished as she walked along the corridor, and she smiled sadly at them; the parody of a miko. She wasn't miko enough to do anyone any good, was she? Kikyou might have been a parody of life;_ she_ was a caricature of competence.

There was no real point to keeping that paper there, next to her heart. She had long since memorized the passages, the diagrams, the angle of the blade. It wasn't a very hard spell to learn. Blood magic was powerful, not complicated – primitive, even. But somehow the fact that it was there lent her a strange sort of comfort. Kagome resolved to try and put it from her mind.

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Breakfast was a rather silent affair. Sesshoumaru was already there when she arrived, but he did not quite want to meet her eyes. Kagome felt awkward in the silence. It wasn't the soft companionship without words she had shared, once. It was the empty echo of nothing to say.

Satsuma and Tosa exchanged a look, once. What was going on? Tosa seemed mildly interested, but didn't try to interfere. He knew a disagreement when he saw one, and knew, equally well, that if he _did_ say something both injured parties would turn on him. He did not feel like having both Kagome, and Sesshoumaru, mad at him. They might object to any plans for later he made...he would save his comments for later.

Satsuma watched them as well, and sighed as she turned her attention to Tosa. Tosa probably thought he was being clever, but she could tell, after who knew how many years with him, what was going through his head. He was, at heart, a hopeless romantic. (After all, it was Tosa who had invested all that money in the library, Satsuma thought wryly. Books upon books of sloppy poems, and he just _ate_ them up...)

She knew, equally well, that it would be a bad idea to let him try his hands once more at matchmaking. Tosa seemed to feel that the best chance for saving Sesshoumaru's life lay in Kagome, therefore, his reasoning went, Tosa would 'help them along.' Satsuma smiled briefly. Tosa was an interfering busybody and a terrible gossip, if given the chance. And men said women were bad!

Satsuma did not thing that was the best idea, though. If pushed into something by a well meaning, but not very competent Tosa, Sesshoumaru and Kagome would ultimately be even worse off than if he'd done nothing. She understood, but didn't think it was right. They had to come through on their own, or sink. And besides, Tosa had other things to worry about...

Satsuma permitted herself a small smile. Yes, other things indeed...if there weren't things to attend to yet, she'd _make_ some.

"Tosa? I think, perhaps, that you and I might want to take advantage of the ship's travel time to catch up on paperwork." Satsuma glanced once at Kagome and Sesshoumaru, and smiled. "He does neglect it so...I had it brought specially on board for him."

"You didn't!" Tosa wore a look of horror, matchmaking once again forgotten. "I was trying to _escape _my desk, not bring it with me!"

Satsuma gave him another look. "You'd have to _find_ it to bring it with you, first." She pointed out sharply, before snapping her fingers. A servant arrived with a bundle of papers in his arms, neatly organized.

"These are simply the most urgent...I think that now would be as good a time as any to work on them. Don't you?"

"But...but 'Tsuma, I have...things...to do..."

"Yes, exactly. _Those_ things." Satsuma gave him a pleasant smile, pointing at the foreboding stack of paper. He gave her a sour scowl in return, and grimaced.

"Yes, dear."

Kagome watched with some amusement as Tosa was practically marched from the room by the smaller woman behind him, and giggled. He looked rather similar to some of her friends parents, when he did that! Kagome smiled again at the mock-petulant expression Tosa wore, and sighed. Tosa was, once again, nothing like what she had expected of a lord...

"Would not want to be in his shoes..."

"No, indeed." Sesshoumaru shook his head slightly, and held back the smile on his lips. Whatever Tosa had done to warrant Satsuma's undivided attention, Sesshoumaru was glad it wasn't him.

Kagome's giggle slowly trailed off, and the room was once again silent.

Sesshoumaru stole a glance from the corner of his eye, and watched her. He had been momentarily caught up in amusement, but now everything was once again remembered. Silence reigned supreme, unbroken by the music of voices.

Sesshoumaru closed his eyes. This time, he would break the silence first. He wanted to make it up to Kagome, somehow. He owed her something, didn't he? He hated the fact he was leaving her, but hated even more the cost of staying. Sesshoumaru wanted to live, wanted it with a need that surprised, and even scared him. But he refused...

There was no other time than this, no other time to say what he wanted to. Live in the moment, for once, not in the timelessness of a detached immortal. Sesshoumaru recklessly decided on a course of action that would have shocked many of those he knew. She deserved...something. And, he felt, so did he, selfish though that was. For once, he would allow himself this brief space of company. An indulgence. Sesshoumaru was generally strict in allowing himself indulgences, but for now...well. This once...

"Do you...wish to go outside? I believe it is somewhat better weather than yesterday." Sesshoumaru tried to infuse his voice with its normal tone, or lack thereof, but couldn't quite quash the small bit of hesitant hope in it. It was very slight, but there. Breathlessly, he waited for a reply, scared as anything.

Kagome turned and looked at him, and smiled. The small upturn of her lips did not quite light her wide eyes in the way he remembered; shadows clung to her lashes. But it was enough. Sesshoumaru was surprised at how much her small smile and words reassured him, comforted, and cheered him.

"I think I would like that. Yes."

Kagome gracefully rose to here feet, and left the awkward breakfast behind her. Sesshoumaru led the way outside, and slowly wandered to the front of the ship. Spray shot up from the sea, and fog hung heavily, but there was no wind. It was damp, and cold but somewhere far above the warmth of the sun came through.

He placed his arm on the rail, and leaned forwards a bit, breathing deeply. The sea smelled far better out here, away from the shore. Youkai were much better about such things, but sometimes the stench of the worlds harbors gave him a minor headache. The one they had left was not as pungent as a human harbor, but the rotting of shellfish, and seaweed tossed up on shore mingled with the refuse dumped in the sea was never pleasant.

But here, it was only waves, sun, and the dampness of fog. Kagome came to stand beside him, and leaved forwards, placing her head in her crossed arms. She wasn't quite sure what to say. The sense of something important, and delicate, fragile enough that too many words might scare it away, rang though her. Something was up with Sesshoumaru. He sounded...differnt. What was it?

"It's a little bleak." Kagome moved to get more comfortable, puzzlement filling her, and concern. Something important had changed since yesterday, and she did not know quite what or how. Last night...What would be the result? She hoped she hadn't scared Sesshoumaru away, into frosty silence.

"Perhaps." Sesshoumaru stared at the ocean, and the changeless shifting of the waves. It was beautiful ...beauty was in something common, brought to new light, and new understanding, by new eyes. He could feel the warmth radiating off the small body topped by messy black hair beside him, and unconsciously moved the slightest bit closer.

"Oh well. At least it is warmer. You were right." Kagome smiled shyly, and sighed. "I still wish it was sunny, though." Weather was safe to talk of. The safest thing she knew. Nobody could find fault with sun, and wind, and waves.

Sesshoumaru nodded. Sun would have been more pleasant, but not even a taiyoukai could control the weather. Much.

Silence splashed outwards from them, wrapping the two away from the world of creaking ropes, and sailors curses. The fog drifted lazily over the deck, wrapping them in its clammy embrace. Kagome sighed, and looked sideways at her companion out of the corner of her eyes Seen in the fog, he looked even more white that usual. Pale, like a ghost. Only the vivid magenta stripes on his cheeks showed any sign of life, and colour.

But too much silence was not welcome, not now. It was not as oppressive as before, but it was still awkward. And, beside her, Sesshoumaru seemed not to be able to say anything. Kagome smiled softly, and decided to make it easier on him...

"Er...last night...I asked about your family, didn't I?"

Sesshoumaru stiffened slightly at the mention of the previous evening, and then relaxed almost immediately. Silently, he thanked Kagome for those few words. They gave him courage to go on, and reassured him that she was here, with him She did not despise him. She might be angry, at times, but she was still here. A peace offering. He hadn't lost her...

And he wouldn't.

"Yes, you did." He looked out across the waves, and presently closed his eyes, remembering. He had said nothing much, only that his mother had reluctantly taken care of him, and that his father had never been home.

Kagome smiled slightly, though the warmth still did not reach her eyes. "I always wondered what Inutashio was like. Everyone said he was wise, and a good leader, but that doesn't tell me much about _him._ Mom always said my dad was really kind, and thoughtful, but I don't remember him much. _I _don't know what he was really like."

Sesshoumaru turned, and looked at her, looked at the small woman with the flyaway hair wearing the white and green clothes, looked at the slight twinkle of the polished necklace that held the Shikon around her neck, purple shine winking at him. He remembered last night, and was glad, happy that this woman had chosen to stay with him, was talking with him, was not below decks completely alienated. No wonder, he thought, Inuyasha always protected her so fiercely. A month, even a week ago, he had not fully understood her value, but now...

He remembered his own resolution, that he would try to make things up to her. He owed her so much, and she didn't even know the half of it. It wasn't a matter of paying back what he owed, now, for room and board, for the care he'd been shown months ago. It was a wish to return the favor, to do something _for _her. Not because he felt he owed her, but because he wanted to. He wanted to make her smile, not to cause tears, something he seemed to be far too adept at. And he realized that here was an opportunity to share something with her, something no other person could. Inutashio...

Sesshoumaru wanted to know that someone would remember him, later, the same as Inutashio was remembered after his death by Sesshoumaru, his son. The last confessions of a soul crying out against the dark, the last clinging to life and light, trying to be remembered by the ones who would stay behind. Buried alone with a name...

He could tell her so many things...he wanted to, wanted to say them all, but there wasn't time, not enough time...

Would someone remember him? Not Sesshoumaru, ruler of the West, not Sesshoumaru, general, fighter, figure of ice, but _him_. Sesshoumaru. Morbidly, he wondered, allowing himself this mental leeway, knowing it wouldn't matter a bit in a few days: Would Kagome remember him...?

"I don't remember that much of my father either. He was not there often when I was young. He was always out fighting, holding his own or gaining more land."

Kagome blinked in surprise, but said nothing. Something strange had happened, and everything had changed without seeming to...perhaps it was the unspoken silence in the air, in the shape of looming death. It ouched everything, hardly to be forgotten, bleaching away the colours to faded bone. Perhaps, it was something else...

Whatever it had been, the consideration given to her question was far more than she had expected. Hesitantly, she asked another question. "Why? What was happening, then? The domains were peaceful, weren't they...?"

"The domains formed from the warfare. They did not exist, then. So many youkai fighting... there were decades, centuries of war, and alliances shifted like sand. It began after the emperor fell, and did not stop till the four main domains, and the remaining four great families, had brought peace. Or something close to it. I was about 14 in human terms, then." Sesshoumaru sounded a bit thoughtful, as though he was pondering the similarities between the then, and the now.

"I see." Kagome frowned, slightly unsure why Sesshoumaru chose to tell her this. But no matter the reason, this was something she had not expected, and she intended to make the most of the fleeting opportunity, because it was unlikely to ever come again.

Sesshoumaru stared across the ocean, and his eyes saw not the fog, but the fortress he had been born in, a building long since dust and rebuilt. The home of the Dog clan, before Inutashio had moved them to greater, grander quarters. "I do not think youkai could survive something like that again. The fighting was not constant, but it wore away at us, and we have been slow to recover even from something that happened centuries ago. Some of the other great families that died, or that were reduced, have not recovered. The Dog clan was one of the few to thrive. Inutashio was partly lucky... and partly he was just a ruthless tactician."

Kagome grinned. "Really? Inuyasha always seemed to think he was wise, caring, and a great general."

Sesshoumaru shook his head. That was the common perception, but was not the case. Inutashio had been a good enough ruler, and a powerful one and, yes, wise. But not always.

Inutashio had been forced into marriage early, by his own father – Sesshoumaru had been the result of that, an unloved duty, and little more. "He was not always wise, or caring. That came...later." Much later... Sesshoumaru had been almost the human equivalent of fifteen when his father had finally shown some sort of interest in actually _being_ a father. He would probably never have done so if the fighting hadn't begun to die down...

"Later?" There was a story here, Kagome could tell. Would Sesshoumaru trust her enough to tell her? There was a lot of weight to that simple 'later'. Kagome wondered what had been bred in the bone, what had gone into the making of Sesshoumaru. For what's bred in the bone, comes out in the flesh...

"Yes. Later. My mother was given in an arranged match. She had her duty to him, and her duty to me. And her music. There was very little else, and very little reason for much else. The need for constant fighting did not help make Inutashio care beyond that, because there was always something else to attend to. I spent no time with him, and he did not try to make any for me... I only began to know my father late in life, when I was almost 16, in your terms. He died not long after, wasting away over that human woman, and Inuyasha. The former southern lord attacked him for the offense of bringing Izayoi to visit, and he was severely wounded, leaving him easy pickings. He died an undignified death, leaving me, a duty, and Inuyasha..." Sesshoumaru trailed off, and looked over the railing, eyes lost in thought.

That sounded...lonely. Kagome frowned, and wondered. Tosa seemed to get along with Sesshoumaru fine. Maybe she'd ask him later... it ought to be common knowledge, at least in youkai circles. Tosa's father had attacked Inutashio because he brought a human woman with him to visit? It seemed... a bit extreme.

Tosa wasn't like that at all! Kagome smiled, a bit. A human came with Sesshoumaru, and Tosa immediately began plotting to tie them up and leave them in the same room...! Incorrigible..! Kagome shook her head, smiling a bit. Things weren't like that at all!

She shook her head, and the smile faded, a bit. Poor Sesshoumaru. Reading between the lines, no wonder he liked to be alone so much, if that was what sort of a childhood he'd had...! It did not sound like fun, to be so alone, to never see your father, to never be loved as one should by a mother. Kagome hadn't known her father, but her mother had tried so very hard to make them feel loved, it hardly mattered. Kagome didn't miss him; she'd never known him. She missed the opportunity to know him.

No wonder Sesshoumaru had issues with walling up his feelings, she thought sadly. He'd been doing it so long he probably could do nothing else, or was not even aware that he'd shut himself away...

_'I wonder what that idiot Freud would think...?'_

Kagome's eyes widened as something finally occurred to her. Music...

Suddenly, it snapped into place. It was his mother who must have taught him! It had to be. Maybe she had loved him after all! There had to have been some good spots while he was growing up, right...? "She...your mother taught you, didn't she? To sing, I mean."

Sesshoumaru laughed softly, a low, bitter breath of air. "She had the raising of me. She saw to it I was taught everything a young lord should know. And no child of hers would remain untutored in music. What I remember of my childhood was strict teachers, study, the learning of fighting when I was deemed old enough not to injure myself, and mother's lessons. I never seemed to satisfy her. She traveled quite a bit, and one day, she went to the capitol and never returned. The fighting took her away too, in a way."

Kagome shook her head slowly, feeling at a loss for words. Damn...so much for that idea, she thought ruefully. She supposed that must have made Sesshoumaru truly alone when he was little, unless there were a few kind teachers along the way.

She had expected Sesshoumaru to have been raised with a loving father, and mother. Inuyasha had always thought so, and had been wildly jealous of Sesshoumaru whenever it came up. Kagome had never had a father, but her mother...her mother had always been there for her. From Sesshoumaru's tone of vice, he did not have many memories of his parents, and fewer still enjoyable ones. He might have had the benefits of rank, teaching, and learning, but Inuyasha had been able to remember a loving home, at the very least...

She wondered why she hadn't known before. Why...? Why was it so strange...? Mother died while young, father never there...and she'd always wondered why he was so icy, so unlike everything one would have expected of Inuyasha's ideal of the kind, loving Inutashio, or the son of a well to do youkai noblewoman.

Maybe she should have guessed, Kagome thought. No one who had been raised in a loving, open home with two doting parents and all the privileges of rank, as Inuyasha (and therefore she...) had imagined would be so cold, surely? It explained a lot that, in hindsight, should have been obvious but somehow, was not.

"I don't remember my dad very well; he died when I was too small to understand what had happened. But my mom was always there for us. She...well, you've met her. She's tried so hard, for us." Kagome looked far out across the water, remembering her own family. There had always been love, even now when times were getting harder, and there was always sense that they really were family, not simply people living in the same house.

Sesshoumaru felt a sharp jab of envy, before he smoothed it away with a sharp mental rebuke. "Mother made it plain I was a musical failure, and as far as she was concerned, that was the only thing that mattered in her world. There were always musicians at the fortress, always people of more interest than me. Father was always away, and when she died, there was no one. I do not think Inuyasha had much to envy. He, at least, had a chance to live with his mother in safety, and comfort."

Kagome blinked, and wondered at the rawness of Sesshoumaru's voice. It was barely there, but...

He envied Inuyasha.

He envied him...

Kagome didn't know whether to laugh, or cry. All along, she had thought it the other way around...

Maybe that was why Sesshoumaru had wanted Tetsusaiga so very much, and why he had seemed to hate Inuyasha, why he has used Izayoi's image as a puppet the first time they had met him, why a lot of things had happened that shouldn't have. Mother, mother, jealous brother...all in a little dance of their own, and no one knew all of the steps, only pieces, enough of speed of the pace, to say, start things that went around in a circle, a game of envy, where the others never knew they were playing.

Inuyasha had never known what Sesshoumaru had just said to her, never known the reasons behind his brother's attacks, just as Sesshoumaru did not seem to understand the difficulties his brother had faced. As an outsider, Kagome could see farther than either of them at times, less at others.

Maybe it was truth, of a sort. Maybe not. Kagome didn't know. But she wondered... She wished she could take the pain of remembering that he denied, bu that was still there, and smooth it away. He might pretend he felt nothing, but that mask...that mask spoke otherwise.

"I'm sorry."

"Don't be. It was a long time ago." Sesshoumaru looked out towards the open sea, and smiled softly, thinking of Sakura Higurashi. Kagome had nothing to worry about... he had rather liked Kagome's mother, in a distant sort of way.

He still felt angry with his father, sometimes. He wished he'd cared about_ him_ as much as he had cared about his love-child with Izayoi, Inuyasha – the hanyou had been not a duty, but a pleasure. A _hanyou_ worth more than the heir, a human treated with more respect... He'd been the son who was never acknowledged, regulated to 'always there.' Background information. He wished it wasn't that way, wasn't the way he remembered things. He wished for a lot of things, but knew they wouldn't happen.

Father and Mother were dead, and dust, and he was done with them save for the sword. At least he had found others, though. He had found Rin, and while he had not kept her long, she had changed so many things. Kagome was changing even more...

If only he had more time!

Wish, wish, if wishes were fish...

Kagome reached over, and put her hand on his, squeezing it gently. "I always thought...well, no matter. What people 'always think' is usually wrong, isn't it?"

"Indeed. _I_ always thought Inuyasha got the better deal." Sesshoumaru's tone was lighter, more of a joke though the undertones of seriousness never left. Gallows humor, he supposed with a start. He had never given in to the impulse before, never supposed he even could, or that he'd ever want to. There was no one to share the joke with before, and he hadn't particularly cared.

Now, he'd just discovered he _did_, and that you found the people to share things with on your own...

...But slightly too late. He was always just slightly too late...

"And he always thought you did, you know." Kagome teased him right back, half serious, half in jest. "He got the sword you wanted, but you got a father, and a title, and place in the world out of it."

"I inherited paperwork, land disputes, Jaken, and a sword that doesn't cut the living." Sesshoumaru was actually smiling a bit, by now. Kagome was amazed, and a little frightened. His face looked so much kinder, softer, when he smiled. This was a strange, new Sesshoumaru, one she would never have guessed at. As though he had momentarily left all the worries behind, and had stepped into a timeless, happy instant. No one was going to kill him in a few days, no one would try to take over the world, no sharks with laser beams, no western invasion, no worries at all...

"Jaken? Seriously? Scary." Kagome laughed, and poked him in the stomach, taken beyond those worries herself by the astonishing smile. "You should use that grin more often. See? Makes you look less like an ice block, and more alive." Sesshoumaru's smile wavered slightly, unsure, and Kagome pressed on.

"Surely a little smile wouldn't hurt?" She gave him a larger smile of her own, and patted his hand. "I promise, it will _not_ crack the face. Miko seal of honor."

Sesshoumaru mock growled, and caught her hand, the barest trace of a smile in place, a laugh hovering just beyond words. "Of that, I am not sur-"

Something changed in his stance, and he immediately stiffened, all pretense at fun gone.

Kagome started, and then paused, outraged they had been interrupted in sharing the few precious moments of fun left to them. What was...? If it was Tosa...Ooooh...

A mental image of Tosa turned into a glowing pink pincushion momentarily entered Kagome's mind, and she didn't feel the slightest sense of remorse over it.

"Kagome. What do you sense from over there?" Everything of jest had gone; his words cracked like glaciers.

"N..nothing...what is it?" A enemy, then?

"I can see a bird...but I am not sure if it is a crow, or something else. Too late to hide, in any event." Sesshoumaru smiled again, but this time, it was not the warmth of ice melting, it was the grimm, bared teeth of the reaper.

Kagome turned around abruptly, eyes searching among the fog, and more importantly, her other senses. She knew her eyes would be of little use; it was simply instinct. But even her power found nothing unusual... "I can't see as far as you...but I don't sense anything, either."

"Come." Sesshoumaru wasted no time in conjuring the 'puffy cloud,' as Kagome thought of it, and practically yanked her on board.

Kagome stumbled, but he caught her arm, and streaked towards the speck that, for now, only Sesshoumaru could see. Kagome had instantly left the playfulness behind, and had focused, begun to search around for the suspected spy with an angry intensity. Inwardly, she mourned. Why was it that Mesau's feathered minions (as this must be...) always seemed to pick the worst time to show up? Why? _Why _did the universe hate and mock her so?

It it was a crow, she was going to feed it to a paper shredder. Soon. _Slowly_...

...And when Kagome caught up with the dark miko, she was going to give her a piece of her mind! She began to see why Sesshoumaru found the idea of violence, at times, so attractive...

There was no point to pretending, now. She had left the necklace of invisibility behind, and Sesshoumaru had been on the deck for some time, without the mask of 'Joseibi' to conceal him. There was no point to hiding, now. Kagome peered at the hilt of Toukijin beside her, and saw her beads wrapped securely around it. Fat lot of good they'd done, in the end...

Sesshoumaru pulled up short, and pointed. Kagome frowned, and then her eyes widened as she saw the bird, gliding in the mist like a white ghost. Not a crow at all...

An albatross. A bloody albatross had interrupted their little bubble away from reality...!

Kagome glared, and refrained from trying to shoot it without even bothering to know if it was Mesau, or just a dumb bird. A dumb, _stupid_ bird with _crappy_ timing...

"As I recall, it was a good omen, until some idiot killed the thing." She muttered, all the while straining every sense, still trying to tell if it was a real bird.

Sesshoumaru frowned slightly, not knowing what she was on about now. "I haven't killed it. Yet." He felt like ignoring what it was, and just poisoning it in midair. Mesau would get what for, and if it was a real bird...well. Served it right.

"Ah... I don't think you need to. It's real." Kagome glared at the bird, feeling its carefree glide to be a personal offense. "It smells like a real bird, doesn't it?"

Sesshoumaru blinked. "Yes. It does." Mesau had never added that to her birds, had she? He couldn't remember...

"I can't tell anything from it. And I would, believe me. It's just a stupid bird, not a miko's plaything!" Kagome was rather angry the bird had interrupted. Sesshoumaru had closed up tighter than a clam, and, she somehow knew, would not unbend so much again. She silently held back her tears, and mourned. Gone, gone beyond recall...Damn, damned bird...

"I could still kill it." Sesshoumaru didn't show it, but he was equally annoyed. Please, _please_ let her want him to kill it...

"No, don't. Things are bad enough without an albatross around our necks. Superstitious, maybe - but more often than not, it's the best choice." Kagome was reluctant, but firm. (In her next life, she was going to be a fan of birdy stew. She just knew it.)

Sesshoumaru glared at the enormous white bird, and returned them to the ship, completely missing the black speck against the sun. The albatross, oblivious to the near brush with death, soared on.

The ghostly bird watched them go with some bemusement. It didn't know it was an omen, good or bad, and probably wouldn't have cared even if it knew what an omen was. Omens were for humans, and youkai, who tended to over-complicate things for no apparent reason. Birds were much smarter about things like that; they viewed the word as things to run away from, things to eat, and, occasionally, targets.

The reason it was hovering in front of the ship was very, very simple: Ships tossed scraps out of the kitchen, and fish came to eat them. Plus, the albatross could too.

There had even been noodles earlier.

In bird terms, it was a win win situation.

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Tosa glared at the paperwork, as though by staring at it long enough, hard enough, it might burst into flame and thereby save him the bother of reading it. He looked furtively at Satsuma, trying to judge if she would notice him trying to escape the tiny cabin to go check on Sesshoumaru, and Kagome. Something had happened last night, he knew. But what? Tanuma, strangely enough, wasn't telling him what might have happened – if he knew. Sometimes, Tanuma had an odd streak of decency about not listening in on private conversations, or at least, not reporting the details in full. Most annoying, if you were trying to arrange something!

It was probably Satsuma's fault – she was the head of Tanuma's clan, and on the rare occasion she told the spymaster to withhold information from Tosa, he listened to her, despite whatever inventive threats Tosa came up with.

Satsuma sighed, and picked up another thin piece of rice paper, brush marks close together in neat, minuscule columns. Tosa regretfully decided that he probably wouldn't be able to esc- leave...the room. For some reason, she wanted Kagome and Sesshoumaru left alone. He had no idea why – It was clear to him that if anything was to be done about that, they needed prodding. And lots of it. Tosa didn't want to lose the stubborn Western Lord because he was too stupid to see what he had, and use it to save himself.

Tosa sighed, and let the the list of trade deals fall to the desk. He hated watching Sesshoumaru continue like this – the detached youkai had few who came close to friend, and Tosa probably was as close as anyone could be, to him. He didn't want to lose even that...

He joked, and prodded the strange pair, the youkai and the miko, but underneath it all, he was deadly serious. Satsuma seemed to think that leaving them be was the solution, but he didn't agree.

Tosa determined that, once Kagome and Sesshoumaru returned from the miko's mysterious home, he was going to get down to business, whatever Satsuma wanted, and however reluctant Tanuma was to go against Satsuma's wishes.

Tosa smiled wryly. Two kitsune, and he was the one making the mischief, while they tried to hold him back!

What was the world coming to?

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_Haha. My opinion has now been aired. Lol. A lot of different references used in this chapter (because I felt like it, after that Eng class, during which I typed half of this on the laptop...urg. I do not like English right now...) and kudos to the one to spot them all.(If you've no idea what on earth I'm talking about, that's okay. Half the time, I don't know either.)_

_I'm sorry this took a while to get up, and sorrier still that I can't promise to upload the next chapter as soon as you'd like; school gets more hectic as the term draws to a close. And...free time just seems to get used in different ways, now, and theres less for this. I'll be done on April 19th, after which, I'll hopefully have a few days before a job, to pay for all this fancy education...but I will have a bit more writing time. Please bear with me! I haven't abandoned this story, it's just...going to take some time._

_**Thanks for the reviews last chapter, guys.** (huge grin) I loved them! I'm continually surprised, and touched, at what you say about the story, or at the wonderful critiques, and the patience you have for my lack of updates. Not only boosts the confidence when it comes to writing essays or more chapters, but gives me more motivation, too...**Thank you, so very very much!** (huger grin)_


	32. ch31:Ramble On

Gah! **Disclaimer**: I do not own, and only make random references to, Harry Potter... Thanks to Bibliobibuli17!

**:: Ramble On ::**

Kagome watched the shore approach, from the same vantage point she and Sesshoumaru had been standing at yesterday when they saw that damn albatross. It was only early afternoon, and the day was young, but she felt tired. Today, they would set out on the final leg of the journey...at this time tomorrow, Kagome would be standing in Aizu. The thought unsettled her.

The shore was a bit rocky, but not overtly bleak in the late morning light. The ship had moved quickly through the night, and Kagome couldn't help but feel as though she, and Sesshoumaru, were rushing headlong towards fate, or destiny, or just plain death. She wished they had more time, wished they had finished that conversation yesterday, but knew that wouldn't happen. After that stupid bird had appeared, Sesshoumaru had vanished into his room to brood, and Kagome hadn't felt right going in to talk. The door was closed, in every sense of the word.

Stupid bird. She was still very upset about that fact.

She had seen him again at dinner at least, which had been nearly as silent as breakfast, despite Tosa's attempts to lighten the mood and get a decent conversation going.

Privately, Kagome felt a little bad for the Southern Lord, and his lady. Tosa only wanted to see Sesshoumaru safe, and it wasn't his fault Sesshoumaru had no intention of letting _anyone_ save him. Tosa kept trying to help, even though he really wasn't doing anything, while behind him, Satsuma sat and watched.

Early this morning, Satsuma and Kagome had worked for what would be the last time on her meager amount of training. Satsuma had just shook her head, and had hoped it would be enough. She had not not lied, and told Kagome she was doing fine. Kagome was, in a way, but she still wasn't that good compared to anyone with a half decent amount of training, and Satsuma had said so.

Kagome was still a little miffed at Satsuma's low opinion of her skills, but realized it was what had to be said; if Satsuma lied and said she was brilliant, Kagome would overestimate what she could do and wind up dead. Not a good way to go, from anyones point of view, especially from her own. So Kagome fretted from the sidelines, watching the sailors make ready for the landing, and privately resolved to take Satsuma up on her offer to come back and do a proper job of training...afterwards.

Yes. Afterwards...Kagome shut her eyes tightly, and didn't watch as they touched into the small cove, and the boat was unpacked. Every moment now seemed to be sand slipping though her fingers, speeding them towards death, towards a duel, towards a world without an icy, quarrelsome, annoying, stuck up, arrogant youkai lord...

Why was it that as she got older, as time got more precious, it slipped away that much faster?

Kagome felt her eyes water, and quickly flicked her white miko's sleeve towards her cheeks and back, refusing to think about it too much, because that would only mean she ended up a crying, useless blob on the deck. She'd cry when this was over, and not before, if she could help it. Sesshoumaru wasn't dead yet, and neither was anyone else!

It was the cheesiest line ever, but while there was life, there was still hope!

If there was even the ghost of a chance of turning the odds in their favor, Kagome intended to take it. Sesshoumaru might have his stubborn sense of honor, but she had no such pretensions. She did not _like_ stooping to unfair play, but Damia had used it right from the start, so it seemed only natural to return in kind! Kagome thought, if it came to a decision between kicking low and running to live another day or being stubborn and proud, she would have no hesitations in choosing.

Now...the question was, where to kick, and how hard?

Pretty damn hard... preferably, in as many places as possible. With steel toed boots.

Kagome had slept on the idea last night and had hopes that she might be finding some answers to the problem. The trip today would give her some more time to think on it. It wasn't like she had anything better to do, and she refused to spend anymore time feeling sorry for herself and moping, not when she could actually _do_ something to solve the problem another way. There's always more than one way to skin a dog...

And, of course, she could always ask her little brother when she got home. _Her_ mind didn't immediately focus on how best to cheat the system, and come up with things like invisibility necklaces. She could, and had, come up with that idea. But he was better sometimes. The ideas might not all be _practical_, (suppose he wanted enchanted batteries for his gameboy...? No low batteries ever again!) but there were plenty of them, and it was worth a shot. Suppose he came up with ideas on how to make fancy armor, or moon boots, for extra jumping power? (Hey, maybe she wasn't as bad at this as she thought...)

She opened her eyes, trying to put on a brave face, and determined to hold herself together for everyone else's sake. They were all on edge, even though she sometimes felt as if she was the only one that let it show. The youkai nobles were all good at hiding emotions...

No matter. Kagome was human, and she made no attempt to deny it. Human emotions were sometimes strength in themselves, weren't they? She hoped it was so – she needed all the help she could find! She was far from giving up, but maybe a cheery attitude might help wake Sesshoumaru up a bit.

Gently, the boat glided in towards shore, alighting with a slight bump. Satsuma came to stand beside Kagome, watching. Kagome glanced at her, and smiled in greeting, a short incline of the head. Behind her she could just see Sesshoumaru from the corner of her eyes, talking with Tosa and Tanuma.

Once again, he was Joseibi, only now, there would be no picnics. Which was a pity, because she'd quite enjoyed that picnic, really...

"Nervous?" Satsuma looked at her, eyes giving off the barest hint of kindness. Kagome returned the smile, in a strained, tired way.

"Well...yes. It's just...Everything seems so..."

Satsuma sighed, and bowed her head a bit. "Yes. Everything is 'so.' I don't like this, but there is little choice. We cannot do _nothing_, and this seems to be the only thing short of war that will do anything to help. And war..." Satsuma's eyes grew shadowed. "War such as I remember from when I was but young, when the emperor died, when the great families set to fighting amongst themselves, is not something to be done lightly. I do not think..."

She shook her head slowly. "The age when youkai were dominant has long since passed, Kagome. Most simply do not realize it yet. Give it enough years, and we would be facing this anyway. Best we do so while we still have strength enough to make a favorable deal with the world."

Satsuma stared out across the water, thinking about what she had said. She had never phrased the situation so starkly before. But, she realized, it was simply the truth. Mortals grew in numbers and strength, and those from other places came in ever increasing groups, while her own people could not match that fast pace. She and Tosa it seemed, were part of a very small group of people who thought this way.

Youkai used to be very great travelers, many, many ages ago. Many thousands of years ago. In the resent past, the last thousand years, they had rarely traveled outside their own lands, so she did not know enough to say for certain what had happened, but from what she knew of these Europeans...well. Their 'youkai,' their 'elves,' (as the westerners referred to them, she had heard) and sidhe, the little people...they were myths. They were gone, away. Underhill.

The places with the strange, foreign names...Holland, England, France...they didn't _believe_ in their youkai anymore, as though they had never existed! That was impossible; Satsuma knew there were records of trade deals dating back thousands of years. Europe had had youkai...

Had. The humans must have driven them off, if their trade envoys had heard nothing, and though she hated to even think of it, Satsuma was not fool enough to ignore that what had happened could once happen again. Humans grew strong enough to pull such a feat off.

Youkai traveled more these days, as some came from the continent to live in Japan, away from the world, and Satsuma and Tanuma had sent their own operatives off to see the truth of the matter in Europe. Satsuma and Tosa had been...surprised...when no youkai envoys came with the human ones. So far, they had heard nothing back from the people sent to inquire. Ominous... It might not be true...but she rather thought it was, a suble sense of intuition telling her the truth.

She didn't want to end up like that, as nothing more than myth, everything she had worked for gone and dust.

"I know. Japan will...it will change a lot, in the future. Youkai..." Kagome shook her head, unwilling to continue on. Satsuma still did not know of her strange origin, and it would stay like that for now.

The older kitsune woman gave her a strange look. "Is this a vision of the future, Kagome? I had heard miko were, on occasion, able to see what was to come. Have you?" What did Kagome know? More than she let on, that was for sure...

"...No. Not really, no." Kagome sighed. She wasn't, technically, lying. She hadn't seen any 'visions' of the future. "I know a lot of strange things, but I've never had more than premonitions. But it isn't hard to see what will happen to us. Japan has...will hold things off the longest, perhaps, but in the end, we're one small country against the world. I mean, it gets better, but...We can't stay isolated forever."

"Indeed." Satsuma's face was unreadable as she left Kagome's side, to return to the group of youkai trying to bundle up the papers she had gone thorough, giving directions as she went. One small island, indeed... Satsuma simply hoped that they could salvage something of this mess. Damn Damia for being so blind...!

Kagome sighed, and slumped against the ship rail. This was getting far too serious for little old her. She was just Kagome, in the end, and she wasn't well equipped for extended rounds of anxiety like this. Too much angst at once eventually ate away the seriousness of it all, until it became possible to laugh even at the most sober things. She did not know how some people managed to remain depressed for so long – for her, it was impossible to stay that way. Even when she had been mourning, there had been moments when she had laughed. She had felt guilty afterwards, as though enjoying life when others were gone was a crime, but that had not stopped a few moments of pure happiness landing amidst the sadness.

_'Just my eternal cheerfulness, perhaps'_ she thought with a scowl, watching the ship erupt into an anthill of activity, watching a few provisions and other travel items. She decided to go and collect her own small bag of possessions, and turned to go, touching the paper tucked away for reassurance, feeling the Shikon warm against her skin, heat absorbed from her pale flesh.

She passed Tanuma in the corridors, and smiled in greeting. He smiled back, in a severe way. "Getting ready to go ashore? Hurry. We're nearly ready to go."

Kagome nodded absently, and the paused, "Hey...um...how exactly are we getting to the camp tonight, anyway? I mean...are we walking, or...?"

"No. In a party of youkai, we might have done that. With you to consider...It might be a bit of a rough ride, but Sesshoumaru suggested carrying you on his back. Much like Inuyasha once did." Tanuma looked at her piercingly, and Kagome flinched, a bit. He was still trying to get information on her, and since every other source had failed, he was trying to get it from her. Direct approach...

"Ah...right. So I don't slow you down..." Kagome sounded a little tired. She was always slowing people down, it seemed. Always being the 'damsel in distress,' (or at least a miko who needed special consideration...) was getting irritating!

"No, you won't." Tanuma frowned slightly. "If there was time, we might have found another way, but it is difficult to arrange for any kind of horses, or even a small dragon like AhUn to carry you on such short notice. We should arrive near this village of yours some time before nightfall, leaving time for you and Sesshoumaru to collect Tetsusaiga."

Once more, Tanuma looked at her piercingly, and Kagome mentally squirmed. He looked like he was a little annoyed, almost, though with that mask over his features it was difficult to say what he felt. But she'd bet anything he was dieing to know where she lived. Sesshoumaru had already told her she'd driven Tanuma to distraction, trying to figure it out.

It must be maddening to someone who specialized in information to be unable to find out about someone who was right in front of him, Kagome thought with a start, barely containing her laugh. Poor Tanuma... she must seem terribly frustrating to figure out!

Well, 'poor Tanuma' would just have to stay in the dark a bit longer, curiosity unsatisfied. Kagome had no intention of enlightening him about the well, and made a mental note to take such steps as she could to stop him from following her and Sesshoumaru, as he, most likely, would. Maybe making another 'invisible' necklace, or making the one she had usable by two people at once? That might work...

Curiosity killed the fox...

That reminded her of Shippo. Kagome's thoughts turned to the village as she said goodbye, and hurried on towards her room and belongings How was he doing? She intended to visit the village immediately after retuning from her home – if she went before then, she'd never get away with enough time to return home. Best she do that first.

She'd have to bring Shippo some chocolates. Or crayons, perhaps. Kagome felt a little guilty over leaving him with Kaede – he only wanted to make sure she came home again, and had wanted to stay with her. But she didn't want him exposed to the problems she had, and had left him, still sleeping, with Kaede while she slipped away. Bringing him chocolate and crayons seemed a poor substitute for that, but at least it would be something.

She'd probably hear some sort of reproach from him – and it wouldn't be undeserved, either. Kagome had told Shippo she'd try not to leave him behind again, and then she'd gone and done it anyway...

Poor Shippo. Kagome wondered if he was somehow related to the two kitsune in the party, Tanuma and Satsuma. Unlikely, of course. They were fairly high in rank, while she didn't think Shippo was, or his parents. Who knew, though? Shippo had rarely even mentioned his life before coming to live with their oddball group, and she had respected his wish not to talk about the family he had lost. Maybe they belonged to the same mysterious clan she had heard about before. Worth looking into, at least, she thought idly, finally reaching her own cabin. It would be good to know he wasn't completely alone in the world. She had no intention of leaving him, but...it would be nice to at least know if he had relatives of some sort.

Next door, she heard nothing but silence. Sesshoumaru was still on deck, probably, talking to Tosa. Kagome set about collecting her clothing, and pajama's. Everything was packed away neatly in the heir to the yellow knapsack, and ready to go in a short amount of time. She hadn't stayed on this boat very long. Two nights, really. Not enough time to miss it.

Kagome took a moment to straighten up, swishing green hakama into place and fixing her flyaway hair, tied back in the traditional look that Kikyou had once favored. Kagome did not wear the right colours, but she looked, for the most part, a miko. Even if she didn't feel like a particularly good one, she still had a right to the name, by now. Kaede had told her that much, at least. Kikyou, she was not, but she wasn't quite the untrained, unknowing girl who had fallen out of time either.

Having satisfied herself that she'd emptied the room of her belongings, Kagome turned, and left. She doubted she'd be back anytime soon. A quick glance behind her, and she was off.

Too bad, really. It wasn't a cruise by any means, but the voyage had been alright, and while it lasted, they still had time...

She headed back onto the deck, and went to stand beside Sesshoumaru. He was already packed, she saw. Must have done it this morning, maybe, while she was still sleeping. Oh well.

"Ready to go, Amiritsu?" Tosa asked with a twinkle in his eye, though the smile on his face wasn't quite real. "_Joseibi _here has kindly consented to help you along today. Since we're going to be setting a pretty good pace, and I don't think a lady such as yourself would be able to keep up..." Tosa struck a gallant pose, and grinned. Sesshoumaru glared balefully at his antics.

Tosa shook his head at Sesshoumaru. "Really, now. Why such a long face? One would think you'd be happy to hold onto such a beautiful woman for that amount of time...Ow!"

Sesshoumaru retracted his foot serenely, and watched as Tosa hopped on one leg, massaging his shin. "I ought to get you back for that, you mutt!"

Kagome smiled back, trying to hide her laughter. Why was she suddenly reminded of Jaken being kicked around? One had to wonder... "Why yes, of course, my lord." She grinned, giggling at the end, though by now her heart was far from in it. "I would be happy to have dear Joseibi's help! Oh, your poor leg...whatever did you do to it? I..." Kagome had to stop, she was smiling so much, unable to keep a straight face.

Sesshoumaru smiled, though it was impossible to tell how much was forced, how much was real. "Then it is settled. The guards are nearly ready to go, and so are the rest of us."

"Guards? How many? I thought it was just a few people going..."

Tosa glared at the both of them, and finally set his foot down gingerly, leaving in a mock huff. "Oh, see if I care! And after all that trouble, this is my thanks..."

Sesshoumaru ignored him, while Kagome once again tried to stop giggling. Poor Tosa! No one appreciated his sense of humor!

"So how many guards, then?" Kagome repeated her question, finally turning away from the spectacle of the southern lord.

"Only a few. Apart from the southern Lord and Lady, Tanuma, and yourself, only I and three of their best will go. We need speed most of all." Sesshoumaru smiled gently. "Don't trouble yourself too much. The details are all worked out."

Kagome smiled back politely, watching as the three mentioned guards declared themselves ready. Tanuma's people, no doubt. She couldn't remember their names, though someone had told her at one point. Which was bad – she ought to at least remember one of the names, but...oh well.

She continued to watch as Tanuma gathered his three minions, and some sort of order was established between those who were coming, and those who weren't. She watched as everyone but Sesshoumaru (who had her to carry already) took a package and made ready to go. She had been surprised at first to see everyone, even the lord and lady, take the bundles of what she assumed was food, but Tanuma had explained it last night.

They were headed to Aizu, the center of youkai society, if not of power. Aizu was only as powerful as it was neutral. Less than half of the bundles were food and supplies, or weapons. Most were fancy clothes, and such props as were needed at a formal gathering. Neither Tosa nor Satsuma, it seemed, saw anything wrong with carrying their own clothes, especially when the guards would not need to be burdened with such things. Kagome approved of that. They weren't stuck up people, at least, and Tosa, for sure, had no problems with making a fool of himself!

Kagome smiled as she awkwardly wondered what to do with herself. Should she wait, or try to help...?

Sesshoumaru had her to carry, though. Kagome flushed slightly as a thought belatedly occurred to her. He didn't really have much to wear, did he? Neither did she – she hadn't been planning on wearing anything fancy, because she hadn't thought she'd need to.

Oh well. Probably wasn't a good idea to attend a youkai ball anyway, if some of them decided you were part of the appetizers that were provided with the dancing...and since she had nothing to wear but what she had on, and a slightly better copy of the same clothes, Kagome thought it a perfect excuse not to attend. She didn't like dances and formal things much anyway. High school hadn't been the best example of those – everything had ended in disaster, it seemed.

Kagome was startled out of her thoughts, letting out a noise of surprise as an arm scooped her up, and she was deposited unceremoniously on Sesshoumaru's back. An invisible fluffy tail wrapped around her back and kept her from falling off in stupefied shock, as well as muffling any further sounds of surprise she might have made.

Sesshoumaru smiled, unseen, at the expression on her face, but a moment later, Kagome was recovered enough to begin berating him.

"Joseibi! You shouldn't just go and pick me up like that, you know! What if I...fainted? Or panicked, and pulled your hair?" Kagome gave Sesshoumaru's long flowing hair a tug, a slightly evil smile on her face. Sesshoumaru raised an eyebrow at that, but wisely decided not to comment. Further talking would only, somehow (he didn't quite know how...) end with him feeling as though he'd come off second best on the verbal exchange. And for once, he was feeling too content with the world to be terribly argumentative.

He turned, and kept pace easily with the group as they began to speed up through the trees, maintaining a good pace. The wind, and the trees, and a warm, comfortable weight on his back. When he was running, he simply was, and worries fell away behind him. Sesshoumaru let himself relax, just a bit, being careful to stay the correct distance back in the group. Not only would it indicate respect, but it might prevent Tanuma's flickering, bat like ears from listening in on anything he might wish to say to Kagome.

Sesshoumaru picked up the pace, matching it perfectly to the groups, and settled down for a long steady stretch of quick travel, long legs easting away the miles. It had been a while since he had done this, and it felt good...

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Kagome, after her initial startlement, relaxed into the fuzzy weight of Sesshoumaru's tail. It held her in place without too much jostling, and, like the one previous time she had been allowed the privilege of a piggyback ride, Kagome simply could not resist putting out her hands and burying them in the soft, invisible fur. Luxury...

It only went as far as hanging on tightly for safety reasons, though. Really.

She made herself comfortable, anticipating a long day of travel with few stops long the way, if any, and then, set herself to the serious task of brainstorming idea's on how to get herself, and Sesshoumaru, out of this mess with what they had.

Well, what _did _she have? Kagome didn't think she was very competent, but it couldn't hurt to lay out what she had at her disposal.

One: A youkai lord, of uncertain mental makeup, and one arm. She wasn't sure why Sesshoumaru seemed so convinced they couldn't win, but...Kaogme was too optimistic to just accept that. Which was why she was brainstorming in the first place, she supposed. Sesshoumaru seemed to be out; he already had a plan (which she didn't like).

Two: Youkai lord had swords. That was good. They were all set to go to get another sharp pointy thing even if she wasn't quite sure how on earth he'd use it. If Tetsusaiga hadn't let him use it on the barrier for her without some sort of help, it was unlikely that it would consent to being used as a tool for revenge. Yes, it would save everyone a lot of grief if Damia was dead, but...

At the heart of it all, it was still revenge, on Sesshoumaru's part.

Kagome didn't think that would allow him to use it, and the solution they had come up with before, with her holding the hilt with him, was totally unworkable in a combat situation. Even slashing it at the barrier had been awkward and she'd dropped it. In a real life combat situation...they'd be lucky not to get killed right off, trying that. She was, again, unable to really depend on Sesshoumaru, the way she had always counted on Inuyasha. She wanted to, but...independance was being thrust upon her, and she'd just have to cope.

Hmn...well, that brought up number three: Half trained miko. Which was better than not-at-all-trained, which she had been originally. Miko were good at getting rid of youkai, though not usually such high level ones...

If she couldn't really depend on Sesshoumaru, and didn't really know what amount of help, if any, she could rely on from the Southern group, then that left herself. Kagome frowned slightly, and began to think of what she had learned. There wasn't time to do anything new, and precious little to perfect something she already knew. She should have done this earlier by far. But...better late than never.

In the past months, she'd learned how to meditate, to focus herself better. She could shoot more powerful arrows consistently through the bulls eye, and was able to summon her purifying power to the palms of her hands at will because of that new focus. Her power was not completely under her control, but it was far, far better than it had been before. If she ever got close enough to punch Damia, and Damia didn't dodge, she could do some damage, perhaps. It was unlikely she'd be able to get that close, though…

She also knew shikikami, illusion and sealing scrolls. Barriers...well, she knew them in theory only. If she tried to make a barrier under stress, it'd probably backfire. Of everything she knew, Kagome felt she was best at shooting arrows, and calling her own power forth. She was not bad at shikikami, but only if given either a lot of time to prepare, or if the thing in question was small. She had tried to make life size copies before, and not succeeded. They looked a bit cartoonish, though they were getting better. Another few weeks, and she would probably be able to pull it off… except that they didn't have a few weeks. Illusions were probably her second best, after the arrows.

It was unlikely that Damia would allow herself to be shot at, or at least, to be shot at twice. Kagome couldn't imagine getting too close and surviving long enough to try and strangle the youkai with bare, glowing hands. Or at least, not on purpose. She might end up that way by accident, in which case, it would be a last resort, just like the arrows would be. She knew Sesshoumaru could dodge arrows, and how little they had affected him. Damia wouldn't be too different, probably.

Illusion, though...there was a definite possibility if she prepared a few things beforehand. The invisibility necklace wouldn't stop her from getting hurt, but it would definitely cut down on the injuries. Kagome frowned, and nibbled a lip.

She had time enough, in the few hours she would be at home, to make a shikikami of some sort. Kagome smiled a bit. If she made an invisible shikikami, that might be interesting…

A sudden vision of Damia and Mesau being strangled with an animated rope that resembled Naraku's tentacles flashed through her mind, and Kagome smiled. Normally, she didn't condone violence, but….

She had to admit, it made a_ very _nice mental picture.

"Sesshou- er, Joseibi?" Kagome absentmindedly played with the soft fur near her fingertips, frowning. Time to bounce a few ideas off Sesshoumaru.

"Yes?" Sesshoumaru sounded like he always did. Calm, and hiding behind his mask. Kagome sighed softly, and shook her head. It was almost as though he hadn't changed a bit. Same voice as always.

"I've got a few ideas I want you to hear…see what you think of them, alright?" Kagome paused, and then continued on when there was no response.

"I really don't like the thought of just sitting on my hands, and watching, you know. So I thought….well, I can't do some things, but there's got to be something I can do. Mesau's in the duel, right? Obviously she's allowed to contribute, so why not me? What if I sent a shikikami with you wearing those beads, or, better yet, invisible from the start? Something like Naraku's tentacles…"

Sesshoumaru blinked, though from behind, Kagome couldn't see. Now there was something that had never even crossed his mind. Kagome was smarter than she looked.

"I…suppose you could air your ideas. Mesau would not be allowed into the ring, though. The reason she is able to help is that Damia can draw on her strength regardless of the sealed dueling ring. You would not be allowed in either."

Sesshoumaru smiled grimly. "I would be able to take her on my own, if this was an equal battle. Not easily, but I am sure I could manage it." His pride still told him he would be able to do that, though he did not like to admit how close the match might be. Naraku had been a difficult opponent; the problem was in pinning him down. Damia would be harder, but at least he knew where to find her, and she would not turn down the challenge.

"The problem is that we are fairly evenly matched; add Mesau, and the scales tip right over. You may look for Mesau, and deal with her as you see fit. But you will not be able, nor will you try, to touch Damia. She is mine." His voice had grown slightly fiercer though speaking, and Kagome shook her head. He was still the ruthless fighter she remembered. But…not quite.

She felt slightly angry. She wouldn't be allowed to help him? Sealed ring? What did they _do_ in a duel? Lock the two people inside a barrier and wait till there was only one left alive?

She said as much, and Sesshoumaru answered with a faint air of surprise. "That _is_ what they do. Didn't you know?"

"No, I _didn't!_ Couldn't I wear those beads and just _sneak_ in…?"

"No." Calm, definite, and very clearly an answer that would not change. "Damia is _mine._ Do whatever you wish to the miko. She should not be there in any case. Nothing more than that, though."

Kagome could hear the air of finality on those last words. She guessed that this went beyond pride, now, into something more. The same reason he would walk into the ring thinking he probably wouldn't come out, she guessed. Stubbornness, and a knowing that if he did so anything to fix the scales, to even the match, anything underhanded, he wouldn't be the same afterwards. Kagome was beginning to see that Damia had already dealt him deep wounds; the years underground, the years watching dust disintegrate, had affected him far more than she had guessed, far more than he'd admit, and Rin...Rin had been a hit below the belt.

He was overcoming it. Kagome was sure of that. Slowly, but it was a start. Yet... like her wish to learn how to create life size, believable shikikami, there was not enough time for it to be fully resolved, none at all.

And, like before, if she interfered...or at least, interfered too much, then it was no better for him than if she'd forced him to cooperate enough to get that bond. He'd accept help only to a point.

Stupid male! Stupid youkai!

Kagome was angry that something so silly would prevent her from doing as much as she wanted to. But...

Heh. At least she could still do _something_ to Mesau. And it would be...terrrifying.

Yes.

Terrifying...

She still owed Mesau for the many times the dark miko's feathered minions had ruined Kagome's time with Sesshoumaru, or caused some sort of fuss, _and_ for the albatross, even if it hadn't been from Mesau at all. Kagome was still going to blame her, because she was the most convenient target. And, she reasoned, Mesau probably deserved it.

So...how best to make Mesau pay? Kagome's wicked smile was full of promise; luckily she was hidden behind Sesshoumaru's, or rather, Joseibi's, thick mane of hair, or Tanuma would be wondering what on earth was going through her mind.

Invisible shikikami weren't quite enough, Kagome reasoned. For all her various crimes, Mesau deserved to be attacked by a large, slimy, writhing mass of oozing tentacles resembling Naraku's. Just to start. Kagome was sure it would work; if anyone stuck a giant invisible, slimy mollusk on_ her_, she'd be not very happy about it!

If she got Mesau to pass out from fear, or, if that didn't work, half strangling her (Kagome didn't think she had the guts to actually _kill_ a fellow human being, not unless she was forced, down to 'either you die, or we die' binary mode) then hopefully that would be enough to stop Damia from using Mesau as a miko battery. If not...well...

She'd deal with that when the time came, if it ever did. Kagome wasn't sure what she'd do, but...

She just hoped knocking Mesau out and metaphorically sitting on her would be enough.

It would be a lot more satisfying, for sure. Normally, Kagome wasn't vindictive, but sometimes, some people just _really_ got under her skin.

Kagome settled herself a bit more firmly on Sesshoumaru's back, and happily began making up thoughts on how best to throughly demoralize and remove Mesau. Absently, she stroked the fur holding her in place, and fell back into the soothing rhythm of Sesshoumaru's running, of being carried on someones back. She had missed this, she realized, the easy movement without the need of conversation, just the companionable silence. Sesshoumaru was a bit more graceful than Inuyasha had been. He didn't jar her around as much. But it still reminded her of other days...

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Sesshoumaru watched as the sun moved across the sky, and as he (and Kagome) moved closer to their goal; the well. They should be there soon, after an afternoon of fast travel like this.

The ship had sped them up a lot; the winds had been favorable, and it was faster to travel this way than under cover in the night, or walking at even Kagome's brisk stride. It was a lot different to travel in a larger company than alone, or with only one other person. The warm weight on his back had been an easy burden to bear, and the bits of conversation that drifted back to him had been interesting.

He now knew that the smaller guard, Kaoru, wanted another child, that Tanuma hated mushrooms (this said very quietly so that the less sharp ears of a fox wouldn't pick it up - whoever had said it had forgotten about the keen hearing of inu youkai.) And that the package of food one of them was carrying was 'far too heavy.' Gossipy...

His eyes watched the foliage flash past his even, ground eating strides, and smiled. Timeless motion, timeless actions. When you ran, it was in your own little world.

And yet...not quite. They began to slow after an hour, and on his back, Kagome perked up, aware of the change in pace, and the more familiar surroundings.

"Hey. Are we almost there?"

"Almost. Yes." Sesshoumaru slowed even further as the group ahead of him began to slow. He watched carefully, and noticed the surroundings around him had melded from just another stretch of forest into a place he knew. They were close to the village...and to the well.

"Alright, everyone! Fan out, set up camp, get the food going...I'm starving, I'm sure you are too...! Set the perimeter, drop those damn dress clothes, and then burn the silly things – no, 'Tsuma, I was kidding! Honestly!" Tosa paused in his stream of orders, collimating in the order to burn the fancy dress clothes, with an innocent smile, in response to Satsuma's scowl.

It didn't look like Satsuma was buying it. "Give me those, Tosa. If they are so much trouble to take care of, then let me help you out." She took the box of finery from him, and then smiled lightly, murmuring how nice Tosa would look, since he hardly ever dressed up unless forced...

Slightly paler and more apt to twitch at sudden grins, Tosa returned to directing traffic.

To the side, Tanuma was working steadily. He had already dropped his own load of supplies, and had turned to Sesshoumaru and Kagome. "We leave before dawn. Please wait for just a few minutes, while we sort this out, and then I'll send a guard with you." He returned to working on the tent slowly being erected, Tosa still enthusiastically shouting helpful comments from out o the way, Satsuma shooting the whole thing amused glances from the sidelines.

"Oh...Tosa..." Tanuma shook his head, and grimaced, anticipating a long hour ahead of him fixing the mess. "Tosa!" He took off in the direction of the ordered chaos in the clearing, as Tosa tried to, ultimately unsuccessfully, direct the set up of camp.

All in all, Kagome thought, he was probably on par with one of her favorite literary characters, Arthur Weasley, for camping skills. On the other hand...

This was a perfect way to get away. Kagome had no desire to remain and let Tanuma's guards see the well, and she suspected 'Joseibi' shared her feelings.

"Think we should go while the goings good?" She whispered. "This necklace...well, if I try wearing it, or if you try it, we should be okay, right...?"

Sesshoumaru nodded slowly, and held still as Kagome awkwardly, unseen by those caught in the passion of camping, slipped the string of beads around Sesshoumaru's disguised neck, standing on tiptoe.

Sesshoumaru scoped her up again, and Kagome grinned, winding her fingers firmly back into the soft, blurred fr of his tail. It looked like she was floating in thin air! She wasn't touching the ground, and they would leave no trail, not if it was Sesshoumaru who was going to be doing the legwork. Tanuma wouldn't know where they'd gone if they got back soon enough. They could say the sword was hidden in the well, not _on the other side_ of the well, and neatly avoid any time travel related questions.

Silently, and half unseen (Kagome was willing to bet she looked exceedingly odd, perched on 'empty air'...) they crept out of the clearing, and once they had left the arguing guards, lords, and spymaster behind, Sesshoumaru took off, sprinting. They flew like birds, flew **_past_** birds, and dodged around the flock of black feathers that were torn through in a blaze of speed, and forgotten.

They bounded through the trees with an exhilarating rush, Kagome aware that the pace was nearly breakneck. Before they had gone at a good clip, but now...! It was a flat out run, and for someone of Sesshoumaru's speed, flat out was fast indeed...

The wind stung, bringing tears to her eyes, and they were gone, away, past trees she remembered, places she knew, swift as a glittering arrow. They were nearly home, nearly there.

Kagome smiled, and despite everything, her spirits rose a little as they few towards the well, leaving trouble behind, leaving the nosy Tanuma behind, and everything else. The other side of the well was sanctuary, in a way.

Later, they would visit the village, and later yet, return, but for now, there was nothing but a few hours, and time for dinner. Her mother shouldn't have started cooking yet, so hopefully, here was room for two more people at the table. If not, takeout solved everything. She needed just a little time to be able to think of nothing at all, to forget the stress, the worry, everything...

Over the ridge, the trees thinned at last, and Kagome smiled, delighted to see the well again. Plain and worn it might be, but it was very special as well, and durable – it was one of a few things that spanned the centuries. The well, and the tree.

"We're here." Sesshoumaru slowed down in the mad, frantic run away from camp, to avoid discovery, and allowed himself a half smile. They'd made it, and no one was following. Kagome slipped off Sesshoumaru's back, and smiled up at him, or rather, at where he ought to have been. "Thanks for getting me here, Sesshoumaru."

Carefully, she reached up towards the necklace around 'Joseibi's' neck, and felt her way along the soft, blurred feel of skin until she found the stone beads, and gently pulled them off. Underneath, Sesshoumaru still wore the disguise, and this came off next. Kagome reached for it with just as much solemn care, and pulled it away, leaving only Sesshoumaru behind under all the layers.

"Thankyou for allowing me to use your disguise, Kagome." It wasn't something he'd been planning on saying – but Sesshoumaru found himself actually glad he had been able to use the necklace, and her own 'invisibility' one.

He would never had guessed, or have admitted to gratitude, all those months and weeks ago when she had first attempted to puzzle out how to put the necklaces together. He hadn't been pleased with looking human, nor had the process by which she had arrived at it been pleasant. (Well, in retrospect, perhaps it was...just a little funny. But only a little.)

Sesshoumaru smiled slightly, and turned towards the well, Kagome beside him. Enough of that now; he didn't need to brood. Kagome's good mood this afternoon had been infectious, and he found himself in enjoying the early evening.

Blithely, Kagome and Sesshoumaru stepped into the well, forgetting the surroundings, forgetting the journey to arrive there and focusing on the destination.

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_And, there you are, another chapter...And, unfortunately, notice of the story going on a **temporary hold** till after about April 20th. I've simply run out of free time. By the time I get home at night, theres little to no energy for this. I've got a lot of ideas, and no problem with writers block, and I'll be working when I can, but...I thought it only fair to tell you that the next update will be over 3 weeks from now, not entirely sure when. I'm not abandoning this story – far from it! But, due to a large amount of school related stress, studio hours from hell, and finals rushing in at me...yeah. You get the idea._

_Thank you to everyone who's been reading (and reviewing) this monster story of mine so far; I know its long, and the updates aren't as good as they could be, but I'm glad for your support so far. Thanks so much, guys! You rock! XD_


	33. ch32:Interlude

**:: Interlude ::**

Kagome stepped out of the well house, the sun from her own time cascading down her hair, warming her back and casting a long shadow in front of her. It had been spring when she first found Sesshoumaru, she reflected, and now it was getting to be high summer. Time was a funny thing, and far more fragile than most realized...

Behind her, Sesshoumaru's light footfalls crunched on stone, and she turned, and smiled. Home...

Suddenly, everything almost seemed very far away and distant, unreal, but then, she looked back at Sesshoumaru, decked out in his feudal armor and implacable look, and it all came back. Kagome's grin slipped away. Perhaps home wasn't the refuge she had dreamed of...but she would take what rest she could, while she could.

She smiled back at Sesshoumaru, and impulsively grabbed his hand, dragging him along behind her. He looked on, slightly bemused, as she pulled him along in her wake, green hakama swishing and slapping the pavement, a bit of mud on one hem. "Come on! Lets see what's for supper. It's...oh..." Kagome frantically dug through her bag for her watch, previously hidden away so it wouldn't destroy the fiction that she was a real, honest, feudal era born and bred miko.

"Five thirty. Mom will be home soon to start supper. Souta should be home, and Grampa." Kagome paused, and then looked down at herself, seeming to realize she was wearing feudal clothing for the first time. She had worn red and white home before, though not often. Never white and green – it made her feel slightly self conscious, to wear her feudal uniform home, and not her school uniform. Not too much though. She'd been stretched out in so many ways these past years, forced to grow up, that it didn't bother her the way it once had to be slightly off center of normal looking.

Sesshoumaru watched her carefully, still having not reclaimed his hand. Kagome held on, seeming lost in thought after she'd stopped so abruptly. And another thing...

"...you know, if Grampa is at home, he's probably going to start plotting to paste scrolls on you the moment we enter the house, right? Even if I'm wearing this, and so on..." Kagome widely gestured at the clothing, cut exactly as a miko would wear it. Her hair was tied back like Kikyou's had once been, and even if she did not wear red, everything else about her was perfectly in place.

Kagome grinned, and decided it didn't matter. All that did was getting home, getting dinner, and a time in which to plan. All of a sudden, she felt famished, but the thought of food didn't distract her from her goal, which was to create some sort of shikikami in the time she was here. Kagome headed for the side door of the house, and stepped inside, Sesshoumaru still being absentmindedly tugged along behind her, a slight air of bemusement still on his face.

"Hey! Anyone home? Souta? Grampa? I'm back!"

There was the sound of a distant crash from upstairs, and Souta came tumbling down the steps at a run. "Kagome! We didn't think you'd be here for...a long time. Its good to see you!" Souta was grinning widely. "Hi, Sesshoumaru! Didn't expect you either! You staying long, or ...?"

"Good to see you too! Not too long. Just for dinner, and enough time for me to make a shikikami..." Kagome frowned, and finally realized she was still holding onto Sesshoumaru's hand. Blushing, surprised he hadn't reclaimed it, she dropped his hand, and smiled, a little wobbly. "I'm going to go upstairs, actually. I have a package of ...paper. There. Paper." yes. Paper...

Kagome snickered slightly, remembering something else about that particular paper.

'Tosa Washi.' That was what the package of origami paper was stocked with. A type of rice paper - named after the prefecture from which it came, which was named after Tosa (Apparently it was, at least according to Sesshoumaru, when she had asked about Tosa and Satsuma). Somehow, Kagome thought it was an appropriate use of the paper, considering that she was trying to help everyone back in the feudal era.

"Anyway...where's Grampa?"

"He went out for tea with a friend. He should be back soon..." Souta frowned, and glanced towards where the stone steps leading to their house would be, if the walls weren't in the way.

"Ah. I see. I have to do some things upstairs, alright? You and Sesshoumaru can keep each other company, I guess." Kagome smiled brightly at Sesshoumaru. "I don't know if Grampa will try to do the ofuda thing again, but...at least this time you have warning?"

Sesshoumaru raised an eyebrow. He had been silent since they had come here, distracted by his own thoughts. He'd thought it was slightly amusing when Kagome realized she still had possession of his hand, but let it go. He had more important things to worry about. He hadn't minded her holding on, to be honest. It had even been slightly enjoyable, and he'd been sorry to let go. But he couldn't hold on forever. And...there were, as he had noted, other things to worry over...

...Like being left to cope with Souta, while waiting to be ambushed by a sticky piece of paper with still-wet ink on it.

If Kagome had wanted to distract him from the matters at hand, she couldn't have done it better if she tried.

"Things to do? Like what?" Souta sounded puzzled. "I thought you'd at least want to head Grampa off when he came home..."

"I've got...miko things to do, alright? And I need some time, and some quiet to concentrate and get it done. Would you mind not bothering me for a bit?"

Kagome smiled, and Souta smiled back, slightly confused, but fine with it. "Alright...dunno whats so important, but okay. We'll keep it down, and I'll watch out for when Grampa gets back" He turned towards Sesshoumaru, who still wore a small, bemused and slightly worried smile, and grinned widely.

"Wanna play Jade Empire?"

Sesshoumaru felt an odd sense of impending doom...

Kagome hid a smile behind her hand as she retreated to her own room, to work. That would ensure some quiet. Souta knew to keep the volume low both for her concentration, and for the tender ears of Inu-youkai. Inuyasha's playing of games had already taught Souta that.

Sesshoumaru watched as Kagome left, and then stared at Souta, not quite sure what he was taking about, and not sure he wanted to know. A Jade Empire? Was this some sort of 'game'? Why did Kagome have to leave him with Souta? It couldn't be good for his mental health – and Souta _was _on Sesshoumaru's very short 'do not kill' list, so Sesshoumaru was slightly at a loss as to how to get out of playing this "Jade Empire"...he couldn't threaten bodily harm, threaten political action, _act_ threatening, or even take out a sword to sharpen it...threateningly.

Damn.

"Jade Empire?" He asked cautiously. It...sounded...odd. Empire – but ... in a TV box thing...? What harm could it do...?

Well, maybe he'd give it a try. Kagome needed, as she had said, peace and quiet, and he could help keep Souta occupied, he supposed...at least this time he was forewarned of the ofuda wielding Grandfather.

Sesshoumaru took a deep breath, and braced himself, not knowing what new terrors this 'Jade Empire' would bring.

"Yeah! Jade Empire! Come on, its over here in the living room..." Souta grabbed his hand and dragged him over. Sesshoumaru's self control was put to the test as he resisted the impulse to shake the boy off like the nuisance he was, and stared as a game control was placed in his hand.

'Kagome...' Sesshoumaru mentally groaned as the TV menu blinked and beeped at him.

How had he gotten himself into this?

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Kagome quietly climbed the steps to her room, mind churning.

Mesau wasn't nearly as strong as her, when it came to raw spiritual power – Kaede had told her that a long time ago. Damia was the source of Mesau's new power, and if the youkai was drawing on it to fight Sesshoumaru, that should, logically, leave Mesau with even less to fight Kagome with. This was good.

She had no idea what sort of physical shape the woman was in, and only a vague, thumbnail description of her from Tanuma. That could present a slight problem...Kagome was no stranger to combat, but she didn't feel at all comfortable facing someone with an unknown skill level. Hers wasn't that great in hand to hand, Satsuma had said, and spiritual arrows against another miko just seemed silly. Kagome would avoid confrontation head on if at all possible. Distance. And finding out where Mesau was, and what she looked like.

Oh well. She'd figure that part out easily enough. Just ask Tanuma to do her a tiny favor...and tell her where, and who. If he was nice, maybe she'd take pity on him and trade information she needed – such as where Mesau was during the match – for some personal info. Kagome thought it was a fair deal, and solved her problem nicely.

The best way to come at Mesau, she supposed, was to wear her 'invisible' necklace. Mesau didn't need to know there was someone pretending to be 'mighty miko-ninja, destroyer of evil-miko,' sneaking up on her. She'd not have chance to take Kagome on in a fair fight. Unlike Sesshoumaru, Kagome felt being practical was the better part of valor. So...sneak up...

And then...she'd unleash the shikikami she was about to make on Mesau.

It would work.

It had to.

Kagome sat down at her desk, paper and pencil close by, the stack of rice paper not far away. First off – the shikikami had to be 'invisible', so to speak, as well as all the other things she'd thought of. She didn't think she had the time or energy to make beads and shikikami properly in one go – Kagome would tie the 'see me not' right into the shikikami instead.

So she needed that. And tentacles. Those sounded good. Kagome started doodling an octopus with pencil and paper, and frowned at it. It looked far too cute to be a proper minion.

She frowned, and scratched that out, drawing another beneath it, a meaner looking one. Kagome was not mean by nature, nor did she wish to be. But she would admit to a streak of fierceness that surfaced every now and then, especially when someone threatened a friend, like Sesshoumaru...

The tentacles grew spikes.

Kagome smiled, and tapped her pencil against the paper lightly, thinking. A mass of invisible, strong tentacles was good – especially if she wanted to knock Mesau out without actually killing her, if she could- but she needed more. What if Mesau set a shikikami on _her._..?

Kagome's eyes fell on the metallic paper shredder by her desk, and they lit up.

She had sworn, once, to feed the feathered crow minions to the shredder. Now seemed a perfect time to start preparing to do so.

The spiky octopus grew a large mouth, full of teeth, leading to a shredding container. It also began to look metallic.

Kagome decided to arm it with a blunt hammer, suitable for concussions, and to name the not-quite-so-cute-now shikikami Thor.

Aware that she was being slightly silly by now, but still, underneath it all quite determined, Kagome grinned, and decided to go with what she had. Maybe she wasn't as bad as she thought she was with coming up with ideas like that.

Kagome put her rather bad drawing of a scowling, barbed, paper shredder enhanced octopus aside, and closed her eyes, seeing the way she wanted to make the shikikami in her mind, and gently nudging that mental picture until she could feel the outline, sharp and heavy, metallic, ready to knock someone out... without them actually seeing the creation.

Kagome took apart the stash of Tosa paper, and took up a sheet in one hand, scissors in the other, and slowly began cutting. The long strands of fiber in the paper pulled, a bit, but the scissors cut through eventually, and Kagome was left with a piece of paper, slightly frayed and spider-like on a few edges.

The scissors put away, Kagome put herself to the task of calming herself, and trying to hold, as strongly s she could, what she wanted in her mind. She took a deep breath, and began.

Under her hands the paper took shape, grew and writhed into a mass of heavy arms. The spikes were there, but dulled, blunt, more like the knots on a wooden branch than true spines, thirsty for blood. She was not that cruel.

Teeth opened and closed on the paper mouth, growing into a copy of the shredder, and Kagome began to sweat, beads of perspiration rolling off her forehead as the twisting, half seen shape before her began to disappear, bit by bit, into the air. Disappear, but not vanish. Kagome could see the paper monster in her minds eye, and feel the cool touch of paper lead on her hands when she reached out and felt for it, making sure.

The paper monster was still mutable, in her hand – it shifted and trembled, a long red balloon blown up, waiting to be tied and made into a small, compact poodle. Kagome reached out with a metal finger, and gave her creation a poke, trying to tie up all the loose ends so it wouldn't collapse on her the second her concentration wavered. More small droplets made their way down the side of her face; this was the hard part.

Self contained, and finished...Kagome worked as hard as she could, pouring resources into the paper doll. It had to be as good as she could make it; she'd be fine tomorrow, after spending so much time and effort on this thing, and ready to go. She was home and safe for the moment, and could afford to do this, spend this amount of energy.

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Desperately, Sesshoumaru prodded the buttons on the controller, wincing as the player on screen was killed – in a very foolish way that could have been easily prevented if he could just tell the silly human player to _move_ – again.

Damnit! This just wasn't working!

Souta watched from the couch, slightly amused. Sesshoumaru actually seemed to be enjoying the game – it had been out for a while, so he and Inuyasha had played it once.

Now that he thought of it, Inuyasha kept muttering about silly buttons too, come to think of it...

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Kagome's eyes were closed when she finished, now very, very tired. She wasn't sure when she had closed them, or for how long – but she knew she was finished. Carefully, she gave the stationary mutated metal octopus – maybe she_ would _call him Thor, just because it was easier to say – a mental prod.

Thor moved, slightly, under her direction. Kagome didn't see it, but she felt the lead mallet move, up and down. She told it to go forwards, and blinked as something cool glided from the desk, down her leg, to the floor. Metal cool, and heavy. If this thing fell on her, she'd get the wind knocked out of her. Paper could be extremely heavy, when it needed to be. (Strange, but true. Twenty large sheets of 2 by 1 m paper were very, _very_ heavy to carry for long)

Thor seemed to be working pretty well. Distantly, Kagome could see him, sorta. It was very_ hard _to see him (which was the general idea) but a massive, solid feeling about a meter high, occupied the center of the room. Thor was leaving indentations in the carpet.

Slowly, Kagome let out a tired smile, and then dared to look at her watch. Past six thirty – she'd been up here for more than an hour! Shit...

Oh well. Sesshoumaru and Souta must have told her mother and Grandfather not to disturb her – Kagome had been concentrating hard enough to block out the small noises of others sharing the same house, and the distant, muted sounds of electronics and automobiles.

With a groan, Kagome levered herself up from the chair, and stretched a bit, before heading to the closet. Slowly, she opened the door, and reached inside to the back, where the fire rat robe of Inuyasha was wrapped protectively around the sword. Kagome's fingers trailed over the soft fabric, and she cautiously pulled it out and put the haori on, considering. Should she take this as well as the sword, for Sesshoumaru?

Perhaps she would. Kagome took the bag she had brought upstairs with her, and placed it gently inside. The sword she held for a moment, eyes closed, remembering.

After this long, her regrets had faded, a little. She remembered the good times, and the bad. The funny ones. The many, many bags of ramen, and the bravery. Inuyasha... He was still with her, but it was no longer a haunted feeling. She accepted it.

Slowly, Kagome stood up, sword in hand and bag in the other, a transplanted feudal miko. She still felt a little stiff from her work. Thor stayed where he was, and Kagome headed downstairs, calling Thor to follow her.

As she headed towards the kitchen, she could hear the sounds of people talking, and the faint clink and chime of dishes meeting chopsticks. Kagome peered around the door frame, and smiled. Sesshoumaru sat beside Souta, looking not too bad for having been left at her younger brothers mercies for an extended period of time. Her mother was pouring her grandfather tea, and Grampa himself was glaring surreptitiously at Sesshoumaru. Souta was happily digging into the rice.

"Kagome! Souta said you were busy, and not to call you for a bit!" Sakura Higurashi set the teapot down, and came over to give her daughter a quick hug and a huge smile. "How is everything going? Did you get what you needed to done? And why is Tetsusaiga down here?"

"I...I'm taking it with me." Kagome smiled, but did not elaborate, placing her bag and the sword out of the way in the living room.

"Yup – I did get everything done. Everyone, meet Thor." Kagome mischievously gestured towards the general vicinity of Thor, whom she had left sitting behind her out of the way. It was too bad, Kagome thought, that she wasn't good enough to give the construct a little more individuality. It moved a bit on its own – she wouldn't have been able to make the thing walk otherwise, trying to direct each tentacle. But it did need her to tell it what to do, and what direction, or it just sat there. At least, she thought with a grin, telling it to 'attack!' would suffice. She needn't tell it more than that when the time came, and Thor would happily pummel Mesau for her.

Souta peered around his sister, and then frowned. "Ah, Kagome? There's nothing there...are you feeling alright?"

Kagome grinned. "Thor, march!"

The sounds of something moving in the silence that followed this were clear to be heard. Souta peered around, puzzled, while Grampa's eyes darted around the room. "I can't see it! Is it a youkai?"

Kagome grinned. "Nope. I made it – its a shikikami, Grampa. An invisible one."

"A shikikami...?" Grampa smiled. "Take that, youkai! A shikikami to carry you off! My granddaughter can make shikikami!" He smiled widely, and gestured at the empty space beside him. "Come sit down and you can tell me all about it!" This was followed by an outright glare in Sesshoumaru's direction.

"It's_ invisible_? Wow." Souta stared hard at where he could see a slight indentation in the carpet, and gingerly put out a hand. "It feels like metal...are those arms...?"

"It is metal. Very nice, Kagome" Sakura Higurashi patted the shikikami awkwardly on the head, and then turned back to Kagome. "What can I get you, dear?"

"Something to eat before I go back. Anything you make is good, mom." Kagome smiled and sat down at the table, mouth watering.

Sesshoumaru raised an eyebrow as she began to eat, and then smiled slightly, mood much lighter since he had stepped inside.

Playing Jade Empire had actually not been as bad as he had anticipated. Souta had only beaten terribly badly the first time round – after that, he'd been beaten less severely.

The players reminded him a bit of youkai, or human warriors, priests. It was a lot more familiar than the last time he had seen Souta entranced by the x-box, with the large guns and dreamy unreality. Not to say Jade Empire was realistic, of course. Far from. It was simply a bit better in his opinion.

Although playing with one arm had been a little frustrating... And so was using buttons to do simple things! Why he couldn't just slash his sword and make the player do what Sesshoumarudid, he didn't quite understand – it would make it much easier – but...oh well. He hadn't actually died, and he didn't think he'd have a chance to play the game again soon. Noting to worry about...

Even if Souta's smile had been a little aggravating.

And now, Kagome had finished her little project. Smart thinking, to make it invisible. He could smell a faint hint of metal in the air from the thing called Thor, but couldn't see it. Against a human priestess who wouldn't know what her nose was telling her, it was fine.

Maybe they did have a chance...Maybe. He still wasn't sure what good Tetsusaiga would do him, but something told him it might be more useful than originally thought. In any case, it was extremely generous of Kagome to lend it to him.

Sesshoumaru smiled across the table at Kagome. He would tell her later. He had made no mention of the mission they were on to Kagome's family while here – he didn't know if Kagome wanted them to know about it or not, and he didn't feel like enlightening them himself.

He wondered what her plan was – he had had no idea she was up to this. Maybe...maybe... Sesshoumaru wasn't very hopeful, but here, in the bright world of the Higurashi family, so far removed from everything else, almost a dream in itself, Sesshoumaru allowed himself, for a moment, to believe that it might yet work out. Kagome might be able to give him a chance.

He carefully snagged another piece of fish with chopsticks, and smiled slightly. He would ask her later, when they had left and returned home. What was she going to do? He could see that she had made a weapon, but...it was very interesting to watch what she was doing. (Currently, this was eating rice.)

This was why Kagome was such an intriguing person, he mused. She was always coming up with different ideas, and surprising him all over again. And she was a lot more...honest, and open than most females he had met. Refreshing. No fretting over intrigue, or vicious social climbing, or the vague worry that she might try to slip him a poison blade between the ribs after they had finished dinner (something which had happened to him once – he was not amused) No, if she was ever angry, she'd come to him and yell face to face. And afterwards, still be nice enough to lend him that sword.

He closed his eyes briefly, and the smile faded. He would miss her. A lot.

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After dinner was cleaned up, and everyone had oohed and awed over Thor (Kagome had deftly avoided questions of why she'd need something like the shikikami in the first place – though she had told Sesshoumaru about the things known as paper shredders. He'd smiled a bit.) Kagome regretfully decided they ought to go back, soon. Sitting in the living room visiting was nice, but...they couldn't stay forever.

After all, Tosa and Satsuma would wonder where they had vanished off to – Tanuma would be frustrated no end – and they did have duties to return to. If she wanted to have any time to say hello to the village at all, or even just to get back on time, she had better leave now.

Sesshoumaru was not pushing for their going, which she was glad of. He was more mature than Inuyasha, who always demanded immediate return to shard hunting if at all possible. He understood that she would go before they were late.

"I think...we should head back soon, Sesshoumaru." Kagome glanced out the window at the growing dark streaks of cloud in the sky, and the setting sun. It looked spooky, setting over Tokyo. The clouds and air pollution made the horizon line a brilliant red in a ll directions, magenta and orange fading in and out on either side of the buildings, the silhouettes of downtown.

Kagome's mother sighed, and then smiled sadly. "So soon? Then I suppose we cannot keep you." She crossed the living room, and bent to look at Thor. "I hope your new friend takes care of you. Watch out for each other. You too, Sesshoumaru."

Sesshoumaru closed his eyes briefly. "I would see no harm come to Kagome, Higurashi."

Souta rolled his eyes. "Come on, mom. She's got an invisible shikikami. What could possibly happen?"

Grampa smiled, and patted the shikikami again. "My granddaughter..." He gave Kagome a happy smile, and absently waved the ofuda he had been holding onto since the end of dinner. "Take that, youkai!"

Kagome shook her head, and laughed. "Right, Grampa." She moved to stand up, and shook out the hakama pants, collecting her bag and the sword. She didn't think Sesshoumaru would be ale to carry it, given its previous behavior.

The green hakama didn't feel strange on her anymore, she realized suddenly, as she left the room. What felt odd was sitting visiting in her own home with her family. It was almost as though she didn't live here anymore, and only came back to visit on weekends.

Sesshoumaru gracefully got to his feet and followed Kagome towards the door, half listening to the strong of goodbyes, and promises of being careful that followed him and Kagome out into the night.

Sakura Higurashi and Grampa stood in the doorway, both calling farewells and good wishes after them. Souta waved as they headed towards the well house in the gathering dark, the night punctured by the rumble and creak of the city.

Kagome waved back, and then both she and Sesshoumaru moved away from the circle of light spilling from the doorstep out into the dusk, and faded into the shadows. The long silver gleam of Sesshoumaru's hair, and the white of Kagome's top as they moved toward the well house. Behind them, Thor trotted along invisibly.

Both people continued to the well house – Kagome reached over to side the door closed behind them after making sure Thor was inside. She looked up at Sesshoumaru, and smiled, nervously.

"I hope Thor works out. I'll make sure Mesau doesn't have a chance." She gave him a thumbs up. "Aizu isn't going to kill you. That's not allowed!"

Kagome scowled, mock fiercely but Sesshoumaru could still see the teariness of her eyes. She was trying to act flippant, trying to be strong, but he saw past that. She wanted him to be safe and sound.

Sesshoumaru cosed his eyes briefly. He was causing those tears, again. It was his fault...but if he did nothing, then everyone, including Kagome, would be worse off. He hoped not to die – he wasn't looking forward to it. He'd miss the things he had just begun to appreciate, like the people around him. He couldn't back down from that, or from revenge. He just wished there was a way to do it without causing her those tears...

"Kagome..."

Sesshoumaru was knocked partially off balance as Kagome suddenly leaned forwards and gave him a hug, holding on as though she was afraid he'd disappear in a puff of smoke and she would never see him again.

To say Sesshoumaru was shocked would be the understatement of the century.

Sesshoumaru's eye were wide as he looked down, completely at a loss as to what to do about the small, black haired woman clutching onto his armor for dear life. What to say? What to _do_?!

After a long moment, Kagome let him go, and held him at arms length. "I'm...sorry if that was rude of me. I just...didn't want to let you go without..." Kagome trailed off, and rubbed at an eye. Sesshoumaru could only guess at what she meant to say – he was still completely flummoxed. He did not trust himself to speak, only continued to watch Kagome set about gathering her things, and the sword.

"Ah...well...Shall I carry this for now?" Kagome awkwardly picked up Tetsusaiga, still slightly flushed and giving off a faint air of embarrassment. Sesshoumaru frantically thought of what to say, but in the end, only nodded.

Right. Tetsusaiga. He'd almost forgotten!

Shaking his head slightly, he took a step forward.

Kagome was poised at the top of the well, not looking back at him. She could feel her cheeks still burning slightly. She didn't regret, really, what she had done. At the same time, she still wasn't sure what on earth had prompted her to do that. Sesshoumaru had seemed...surprised, more than anything. Kagome hoped she hadn't offended him, but then recklessly decided it didn't matter.

"I'll go ahead." She clutched her back closely, and took ahold of Thor, who had stayed silent and invisible beside the well while she and Sesshoumaru acted out their little drama.

With that, Kagome vaulted cleanly, with practiced ease, over the side, dragging her shikikami along with her, the rusted form of Tetsusaiga and her bag.

Glowing vapor trailed behind her as she fell through time, not daring to look back. With a soft 'oof!' she landed on her feet, and reclaimed her balance within seconds. This was old hat, by now...

But something felt off. With a faint frown, Kagome looked up.

...And then, the world exploded into lightning.

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_Yes, there is, in fact, Tosa washi on the market. Yay for rice paper. Never used that sort for art, but some others I have – Sekishu, for one. Hopefully this chapter jives with the rest of the story – been a while since I wrote anything, life's changed a bit more, and its a way different mood. So I __**really**__ hope that the last part, especially, is not terribly out of character. It has been building up for a while, but...gah! Less editing than usual too, so...please forgive me and point anything wrong out?_

_I__** am terribly sorry for the lack of updates**__, despite school being done. The level of busyness hasn't really dropped significantly, to be honest. I got distracted with art, deviantArt, and my website (plus making 2 sites for other people, one for a friend, one paid for...) In that order. And few other things of importance. (silly grin) The next post should, I hope, be up sooner. (especially after an evil cliffie like that. Hehe) Hope this is more exciting, since the last few chapters have been a bit slow..._

_And...(falls over, stupefied with shock) Someone nominated me for Best Romance, Kagome/Sess, IY fanguild first quarter. (There must be some mistake!) And against such nice stories, too...lol. Wow. I'm not sure who suggested this fic, but thank you, so much. You guys have been really good to me – all these lovely reviews, and now this. _

_**Thank you so much!**__ It takes me a long time to update, now...the chapters take a long time to write because they're that long, and I haven't written any ahead anymore – and life gets in the way a lot...but I will try.(and now, finishes being a windbag (grin))_


	34. ch33:Minions

_Be warned...this chapter begins a few days __**before **__Kagome and Sesshoumaru reach the Bone Eaters well in the last chapter – and is mostly from the villains viewpoint. It jumps around a fair bit. Hope you enjoy regardless._

**:: Minions ::**

Mesau sighed, for the forty second time that morning. The dust of the road and the beating sun were giving her a headache - and this was without the two miko sitting behind her in the second cart helping it along. Momiji and Botan, Mesau was convinced, possessed not a full set of wits between them. She glanced at the two guards carrying her own form of transit, a kago. Mesau's was a very plain palanquin – one suited for a low level servant only. The two guards carrying it, and her, were both very fast, and kept up to the cart easily enough, allowing her to experience a smooth ride, one needed for the scrying bowl to work. Ahead of them Sorai, Damia and Kyohei ran on foot. Speed was important, as was keeping a constant watch on the boat In another day, it would arrive, Mesau guessed. They had to be close by then.

The two simpletons were still convinced, to some extend, that Damia intended to eat them. Why this was so, Mesau would never understand. They were also convinced she was exactly like Tsubaki – 'Dark Miko', working for personal gain, seeking the end of the world. Mesau thought it all very tiresome and stereotypical.

Last night, Sorai, Mesau, Damia, Kyohei and two guards had left the castle – a day after the Southerners had left on their boat. Mesau had sent the two special crows after it, of course. She shifted in her seat in the kago, and glanced once more at the ship. Figures moved about, and Mesau ordered the crows to descend a little further, so she could get a good look. She hadn't had a good look at who was actually on board since the ship had left the harbor.

Amiritsu, that had to be...green and white. Mesau peered closer at the troubled water of her scrying bowl, trying to shield the bloodied water from the bumps in the road as best she could. Doing this was hard, but at least Damia had not tried to make her walk and do tis at the same time. They would never have arrived. Perhaps, Mesau thought idly, Damia appreciated her a little more after having to deal with the two dunderheads behind them.

They had been captured and subjugated rather easily, all things considered. Good potential, but they were too easily fooled.

Mesau left off thinking of that for now, and what it might mean to her, personally, before concentrating on the image she had conjured of the ship. Amiritsu on deck, in green and white...and...

Sesshoumaru!

Mesau's eyes grew round, and she was so surprised to see the figure appear that she spoke his name aloud.

Immediately, Damia dropped back to run beside her, after hearing this. A sharp command sent the other two guards, Sorai and Kyohei away, and Damia stood beside the halted cart, staring at Mesau. The other two miko watched her warily, afraid that at any moment, Damia might lash out at them.

Damia gave them an amused stare. "Stop that. And you are forbidden to speak of what is said here. Now, Mesau. What have you seen?"

Botan glared at Damia. "Why shouldn't I tell the others? Serves you right, youkai."

Damia gave her an amused look. "Go ahead and try, if you like. I think you will find that quite impossible. When I tell you to do, or not do something, it is as simple as that. That bond..." Damia lightly traced the new, jagged scar up Botan's arm, pressure just below the point at which it would have scratched "...will not let you do anything else. You do what I say. Now shut up unless you have something useful to contribute."

Botan glared angrily and opened her mouth, but was unable to reply. The words died in her throat. Mesau felt a small amount of pity as the younger woman, and her sister Momiji, glared helplessly. _She_ had chosen this – and Damia had never exerted that much control on her – Mesau knew what she was capable of and and been careful to never provide her a reason to do so. But those two knew nothing of what they had been sucked into, and Mesau doubted they would have chosen it, had they known. Poor wretches...

"Sesshoumaru...I _saw_ him. He is on the ship with the southern lords. Look." The bowl was tilted for Damia's inspection. Mesau spoke slowly, grimly, considering what his appearance meant – and how she had been fooled. Things were not the best, but at least, with these two new miko, they were still going to come out on top. She was grateful for that, ill gained as it was. She couldn't condone, but...

She did not want to face an enraged, who knew how sane, Sesshoumaru, alone. And that did not explain some of the questions that had popped up. What was Sesshoumaru, of all people, doing with a human woman? Definitely not what it appeared to be. There was something there, and Mesau did not like surprises.

Mesau shivered slightly as she looked out the window of the kago, and placed the bowl on the ground, so it could be seen better, carefully directing the crows to hover lower – making sure to tell them to stay silhouetted against the sun. Sesshoumaru did not need to know who was watching him yet.

Damia watched the bowl intently as Mesau held it out to her, and beckoned the two unwilling miko behind her forwards.

"You may as well look – you will meet him soon enough, before he dies." Damia smiled, eyes still fixed on the bowl. Sesshoumaru, in miniature, was who it was. There was no mistaking that pose even at this distance, or the missing arm. Missing arm! Why had no one noticed this before? Precious few youkai had been wounded like that, that she knew of.

Many thoughts were whirling through Damia's mind, at the moment, but the predominant feeling was that of relief. Damia was glad she had sent Sorai away before Mesau told her this. She was still not entirely sure how loyal the woman was to her. As soon as she could, Damia intended to arrange some sort of 'accident' for her. She was also glad they had picked up the two new sources of power – she should be able to take anything Sesshoumaru could throw at her, and then some with Botan and Momiji's unwilling aid. Damia felt, even looking at the ominous figure hovering close to the green clad Amiritsu, a feeling of confidence.

Mesau shook her head, and Damia watched her closely "I cannot see what Amiritsu is doing with Sesshoumaru. It makes no sense. Where is Joseibi? And how did Sesshoumaru sneak on board without me noticing?"

"It doesn't matter where Joseibi or Amiritsu are – just that we keep an eye on Sesshoumaru."Sesshoumaru would die, once and for all, and then she could focus on trying to unify the domains behind her. The North was hers. Ezo had no control left over her own lands. Damia considered this trip to Aizu, once Sesshoumaru was dealt with, a good stepping stone. Diplomacy might work to her benefit. Kyohei had been brought along for that reason – to try and persuade the others that her vision was what they could – no, had to – do to survive and prevail. West and North...perhaps East would join them. Choshu was a reasonable lord, and would see where the winds of fortune blew.

South would be more difficult to persuade, but after a setback like loosing Sesshoumaru (something that was needed) perhaps Tosa might be more agreeable. Things did not need to come to internal conflict.

A sharp gasp from Momiji behind her was hard. Damia turned around slowly and raised her eyebrows. The two miko were standing by the bowl, peering in intently. "You've seen him before, have you?"

There was no answer, only two pairs of frightened eyes. Damia narrowed her eyes. "I expect an answer from both of you – only polite, and you should not withhold something that might be important. Clearly, you saw something. Tell me what it is. _Now_."

Mesau watched as both young miko struggled not to answer – with each passing moment, Damia pressed on them harder through the bond – she could feel it. It had to be something important if they tried this hard to hide it!

On the surface of things, Mesau was glad for the information, but...she shook her head. Forcing the information like this didn't sit well. She had never liked torturing for information much either – the most unpleasant duty of a spymaster. This was much the same.

"Stop...s..stop it." Botan closer her eyes as if in pain as Damia pressed through the bond, compelling the both of them to answer. "Not...Ka...Kagome-sama!"

The younger of the two miko clutched her head, and moaned. Damia sent her a cool glare, and wrenched at the miko's mind through the bond, forced her to say the name again.

"Kagome-sama!"

Behind Damia, Mesau went pale. That name... The youkai in front did not notice, and continued to press on.

Both miko looked wretched. Damia let them go, satisfied. "What _about_ 'Kagome-sama'?" She prodded them both, giving incentive. She did not like to pull at either miko too much – they were no good to her worn to pieces. But she would have obedience from them. Both had been far too loud and obnoxious this whole morning – Damia was tired of it. Break them just enough, and they would be far more willing to go along with her, and be much more cooperative while doing so. Disobedience would not be tolerated, and it ended _now_.

Botan began weeping, while Damia tapped her foot impatiently. Hesitantly, her sister began explaining, shoulders heaving. Clearly she thought she was betraying someone both girls held in high regard.

Unnoticed, Mesau shook her head, and listened intently. It couldn't be...

"Kagome-sama ...she...was standing by...the man you were looking at. Don't hurt her!" Momiji looked at her, pleading. "She has nothing to do with you! She was...she helped us, and..."

Damia raised an eyebrow, considering. Kagome, not Amiritsu? Interesting... "Are you sure that that_ is_ Kagome, and not a woman called Amiritsu? Look carefully."

Both miko unwillingly nodded. "She's wearing different clothing than she used to with Inuyasha, but...I am pretty sure that is her." Botan shivered, looking miserable. Both miko looked terrible – the fires of disobedience had obviously taken a hit. It was quite demoralizing to realize that you could not even protect the people you cared about, could hardly begin to try, no matter how much you wanted to. Momiji gave Botan a hug, and her sister began to sob. Their world had been turned upside down within a few short days, completely.

Behind Damia, Mesau paled even further. It had to be...

"The Shikon miko!"

Damia turned to look at her, eyebrow raised. She wasn't quite sure if that was good, or bad that it was the Shikon miko she was looking at. She had, at one point, tried to find the woman to press her into service – and to add the Shikon itself to her own power, if she could. That thought came back to mind, where she had lain it after calling of the search for Kagome. "Yes. Her. And _what_ she's doing with Sesshoumaru, I cannot even begin to guess..." Damia remained calm on he outside but inside, she was thrown for a bit. A very powerful miko, set against her...that might not be so good...

But it was still the truth that Damia had three miko against one. And presumably, Kagome and Sesshoumaru remained oblivious to their unmasking.

She still had the upper hand.

Mesau drew a deep breath, and looked at Damia. "This is not good at all, my lady. If they are linked, or..."

Damia was the smallest bit afraid of that too, but logic prevailed. "Nonsense. I know Sesshoumaru. He'd never willingly consort with a human woman, much less his hanyou brother's miko. They may have put differences aside, but neither can have that much love for the other. Sesshoumaru tried to kill her once, and she him. I very much doubt they would have tried something so risky."

Never the less...Damia grimaced. If he was in his right mind, Sesshoumaru wouldn't even have let the woman follow him onto the ship, let alone talk civilly. Her mind flashed back to that report of Amiritsu – or rather, Kagome – having a picnic on the lawn with Joseibi. Devious miko...Kagome had to be up to her eyebrows in this, if she had tried so hard to downplay her role. Damia wondered where the third youkai had gone, and who Joseibi really was, then discarded it.

They had Kagome's name, and a spy in place to follow them. The Shikon miko was well known to have ties to a particular village – they should watch that. When there was a chance...

"Mesau. You know of this woman – send one of those crows to watch her home village. I don't intend to give her, Joseibi or Sesshoumaru a chance to reach Aizu." Damia smiled coldly, and laid out her plan for Mesau.

"I doubt her real identity will make much of a difference to us, in the end. I may even be able to capture Kagome. But I intend to see if I can be rid of the threats they present before we reach Aizu. Satsuma and Tosa won't dare speak against me for getting rid of him – Harboring Sesshoumaru and his 'human lover' as rumor paints would not be good for them. Everyone knows they have a soft spot for humans. This might be the thing that could tip the balance for me. And Kagome...might even become quite useful." Damia smiled, coldly. She had to admit, Kagome would fit the bill of the rumored lover nicely. Beautiful, and a known connection...perfect. Tosa and Satsuma would be striped of all but the most loyal of supporters after _that _came out.

Behind her, Momiji and Botan gasped. "Leave Kagome alone! What did she ever to to you, youkai? Don't you dare try to control her too!"

Damia turned, and stared at them. "Mesau. Can you find any fault with the plan set up?"

"I do not think so my lady. Caution though, when dealing with the Shikon miko." Mesau closed her eyes. "She is much stronger than Kikyou was, and I know how much power_ she_ had. I don't know."

"It will work. Everything so far has fallen into place very well. This should present no problem." Damia continued to keep her unwavering stare fixed on the two shaking miko, sounding more confident than she felt. "Both of you. If I hear one word from either of you for the rest of the journey – be it to warn, somehow, to attempt escape again, or to taunt, I will not be in a forgiving mood." She reached out and wrenched through the bond, harshly. Both Botan and Momiji cried out in sudden pain.

"See that you behave. And remember what good ears I have." Somehow, Damia had to make it though this...she had to make sure she could unite Japan, to protect youkai from the west. To accomplish that end, she needed to have enough people firmly behind her, and enough power to throw off even the most determined invasion force. Sesshoumaru was the greatest obstacle, now, but if he was defeated, if Kagome was captured, if she could but tip the scales and force Tosa and Satsuma to follow her...

Then, she might have a chance.

"Mesau, keep watching that bowl. Inform me immediately if there is a change, and I shall come back every hour to see progress. Botan, Momiji, you will spell her when she is tired and perform the same task. You will treat her as you would me, with respect. Kyohei may come to ask how things go, or to watch. Do not tell Sorai what is going on, or the guards."

Damia held her head high, and raised her voice, running towards where the rest of her party had gone to wait out the discussion. Sorai...another obstacle. Damia suspected that if it came to a choice between her and Sesshoumaru, Sorai would support the former lord. She owed Damia fealty – but she owed Sesshoumaru far more, for taking her and her family in, and providing her with a position of such trust.

Damia did not understand why Sesshoumaru had gone so far for her – it was not worth the cost, she had though. Now she wished she had done things differently, that Sorai was in _her _debt instead, but ah well. Things could not be undone, only fixed.

Damia really_ had_ to get rid of Sorai soon – it was getting irksome, having to plan around her.

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Mesau watched her go, and then sighed s the journey was once again resumed. Sometimes, she just did not understand the risks Damia took. The plan they had come up with was risky. What if Tosa and Satsuma both decided at the last minute to jump into the fight, if they caught up to them at the wrong moment? They weren't unarmed, and they had their own guards with them, too.

Damia meant to single Sesshoumaru and Kagome out, and take them while they were alone, if she could Mesau had been with Damia long enough to realize that's what Damia was talking about doing. Sneaky, perhaps, but efficient. Damia did not wast effort if it could be avoided.

If they could take both people alone. Mesau wasn't sure if that would happen before they reached Aizu or not. So far the entire party had remained together – Kagome had not wandered away from either Joseibi or Sesshoumaru, and hadn't left the main group at all...

Mesau bitterly regretted dismissing the other woman so thoroughly before. Eye candy for Joseibi _indeed_...how could she have made such an oversight? Mesau realized that she was up against an opponent who was smart. Not very well trained, perhaps, though, but smart.

She had heard about the new miko through old friends she still kept in touch with in the human world. They were quite useful on occasion – and very dear to her. Mesau's one regret about her life was that sooner or later, all her friends would pass on – and she never would. She wouldn't be able to live with humans for long, anymore – she had cut herself off. Never again...it was a bit..lonely...

Regardless, the information was useful – Kagome was poorly trained, and smart wouldn't help her against something more intricate. Mesau knew the weaknesses of the other.

She bent her head to the task at hand, and sent a command to one of the crows gliding out over the ocean. It would head as fast as it could towards the village outside Edo where Kagome came from, and watch.

Mesau kept the water, and its two birds eye views, in her hands. The only moment of interest was when Sesshoumaru decided he had seen something of note on the ocean, and conjured the cloud, dragging Kagome on board behind him.

Alarmed, Mesau drew her crow away, further up and against the sun. But it appeared that they were interested in something just in front of the ship instead, not far out of the water. Mesau did not know what the white bird they came to was, but thanked her lucky stars it was not her crows.

After the afternoon had passed, boring save for that one moment of interest, Mesau stretched. Damia had come by a few times to see how things went. She had promised that Kyohei would be sent to supervise the two miko while they took over her task. She did not quite trust them, it seemed. Mesau did not either.

They knew Kagome, and admired her. They already felt like they were betraying her, simply by giving away her identity. How they felt actively working for her capture...Mesau did not want to guess.

She wished that they did not have to watch. She knew, if she ever had to tell Damia of her own few links with the human world that she would not wish to give them up. If Damia ever asked her to betray them...well.

She would probably be forced to. Damia could, like she had shown today, exert her will on any of the miko bound to her completely when she chose to. Mesau knew it was possible, but had never experienced it herself. Damia was someone she served willingly, of her own choice. Oh, they had disagreements, but Damia was smart enough to listen, before deciding to do what she wanted to anyway – she knew Mesau was stating an honest opinion meant to help her.

Mesau did not think that kind of control would happen to her – Damia knew the value of a willing worker, one that had not been broken to service like those two might become. Damia would be unlikely to ask her to do something that would result in a conflict of interest...

Mesau shook her head. It was best not to think of it, and how close the situation was to her. She did not want to think of her part in this. She had helped Damia find and capture, helped bind those two young women. She was guilty as well.

She hoped this sacrifice was enough, that she was doing the right thing to help her people. She couldn't go back now...

"Botan? Momiji? I would like to rest. Please, take over watching."

Mesau tapped one of the guards on the shoulder, and her palanquin was set down on the ground. The cart carrying the two miko stopped as well, and Kyohei jogged over.

Kyohei grinned, and took the bowel, sitting in the cart. It stared again, and Mesau was soon moving as well. He would watch while the other two miko continued to power the bowel for him. The switch occurred fast, an they caught up to the main party soon enough. Damia had slowed slightly, and Sorai with her, both watching as the transition was made, the changing of the guard.

What Sorai thought of all this, Mesau had yet to discover, she thought, leaning back and closing her eyes.

Mesau knew she would be told to take over again if there was a major change in the monitoring. In the mean time, Mesau intended to sleep. Who knew when she might be forced to stay awake for long periods of time again, or fight with this Shikon miko she had heard so much about?

Mesau leaned back into her seat, and slept.

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Behind, Kyohei grimaced slightly as he held the bowel. He had been filled in on both Damia's plans for Sesshoumaru – of which he approved – after she had gained enough power, then he would persuade her of a few other things, perhaps, and not until – and her concerns about Sorai. One of them was to be with the former spy mistress at all times, it had been decided, or Mesau.

He did not care for the way Damia was collecting miko, and planning on snagging another one, but he had to admit, they did have their occasional uses. He had never been able to watch his enemies from afar like this before.

He glared at the two girls sharing the cart, one concentrating on maintaining the power that allowed him to see, and watched them squirm. They were as afraid of him as of Damia – more so, even. They knew she had a use for them and wasn't going to kill what could be used. They had no such feeble assurance about him.

Below, he watched the sky and the empty deck. Sesshoumaru and Kagome had gone below, and the sailors were just not that interesting. He had told the girls to make the crow look in specific directions, at times, to see where the shoreline was. He judged the ship wasn't too far away from the destination – they were closer to the coastline than they should be if they had a few more days of travel. He wondered again where it would make landfall.

As night fell, and as the tiny ship in the bowel sailed on, the two new miko taking turns sleeping and working, Kyohei continued to watch with a youkai's endurance. Ahead, Sorai and Damia's long strides ate up the distance between them, and the general direction of Aizu, or wherever Sesshoumaru made landfall.

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Morning saw Kyohei in the same spot as last night, and both Botan and Momiji a little tired. Neither had said much to the other though the night, beyond what it too k to switch powering the bowl for the intimidating Inuyoukai watching the ship.

Botan bit her lip, watching as the sun rose on the same scene it had set on yesterday. The older miko was still sleeping. She had to give the woman a bit of respect, for her skill if nothing else. Maintaining this link took _work_. Botan had never had to concentrate so hard in her life; the cart she was in did not help matters at all, nor the threat perched near, bearing the name Kyohei.

She was scared, still. What was Damia going to do to Kagome? Do the same thing she had done to her, and her sister? Botan was afraid of that, or...no, she couldn't kill Kagome!

She had heard when Inuyasha had died – everyone had heard that. But she'd no idea what had happened to Kagome. The Shikon miko had just...vanished. Botan bit her lip, anxiousness coursing through her and wearing her out as much as the work she had to do. She didn't want to help Damia, but...to help her hurt Kagome, of all people...

Botan silently began to cry, again, but it wasn't because she was sad. She was...but more than anything, she was _furious_. She hated Damia, Botan decided. Hated her with a passion – there had to be something she could do...if she could just _do _something...!

Throughout the morning, Mesau slept. Botan watched her from the corner of her eyes. She wondered why the miko was helping Damia – was she trapped too, and was resigned to confinement? A fellow prisoner? Botan wasn't sure, and didn't trust her. Momiji was the only one she would trust, but her sister was asleep right now, and she couldn't talk to her.

She could do a bit of what she wanted to, Botan found, so long as Damia wasn't focusing directly on her, willing her to do whatever. She could not disobey a direct command – and even if she could Kyohei was watching both of them. Botan was afraid of him too.

She watched the sun crawl across the sky – at times, she began to worry and it sped up, telling her she was running out of time, and at others, it dragged. At last she began to tire, and Momiji was awakened, and told to take over.

It was near the middle of Momiji's watch that things began to get more interesting.

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Midmorning, the boat began to strike in earnest for shore. Kyohei sat up, and narrowed his eyes, watching as Sesshoumaru became Joseibi before his eyes, and disembarked with Kagome on his back. Something strange was going on, there...several somethings...

He knew the place they had halted at – it was not where they should be stopping if Tosa and Satsuma were going to head straight for Aizu. They must be going somewhere else first. And the fact that Joseibi was really Sesshoumaru was...very interesting. It had to be some sort of illusion...Tanuma...?

"You. Take this. Do not drop it, or I shall be very displeased." Kyohei thrust the bowl at Momiji, who gave a frightened squeak before vaulting out of the cart, and running to catch up to Damia.

"My lady. I have found something that may be of great interest. You may wish to go and see for yourself." Kyohei murmured quietly in Damia's ear. Damia dropped back to go see, and he fell into place beside Sorai.

Sorai watched as Damia bent to look at the bowl, and then called over Mesau. Her dark eyes showed nothing, but many things raced through her mind. Kyohei was watching her, clearly. She had known that she was being kept out of the main event for some time. One did not repeatedly send only her and the guards away to make plans. Sorai was still one of the generals of the western army, though by now it was in name only. She was well aware that Damia was slowly trying to disentangle her from the West enough to get rid of her. It wasn't something she would let slide.

Perhaps, Sorai thought, distantly, she could go back home to her mother for a visit soon – and then just not come back. She had always wanted to take a little time off and go see the port of Nagasaki.

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"We're going east, towards Edo." Damia gave the command, and then fell back into jogging, frequently dropping back to the kago to check on Mesau. She knew the woman had some skill with maps, and was familiar with the area around Edo. She had decided that if the party was heading anywhere, it was for the Edo area. The vector of travel was in the right direction, and there were no other possible destinations around there. No youkai but the lesser sort lived or preyed near there, and there were no villages or major shines close by the path the group was following.

Damia closed her eyes, and planned as the afternoon was eaten away by long strides. They should be able to catch up to where the group was, and follow them in parallel within a few hours. Before nightfall. And then, they would continue following, waiting for a chance. The two groups moved at a similar pace – if no opportunity came up, Damia would settle for arriving in Aizu at about the same time. If there _was_ an opportunity between now and then, though...well. A few things could be organized.

And then, the big moment came. Tosa stopped to set up camp...and Kagome and Joseibi – or rather, Sesshoumaru _- did not stop._ They sped up, running towards...somewhere close, but not quite at, the village Kagome was from. Damia ordered her party to speed up, excitement beginning to show – in an hour, they could catch up to Sesshoumaru if he stopped.

And as luck would have it...they did halt. Damia watched and smiled in triumph as both stopped at an abandoned old well. If they stayed there for long enough, Damia would be in a position to be between them, and the route back to Tosa's camp, and if they stayed there long enough, she would be on top of them. She would have them pinned, and alone. Two guards, three miko, and Kyohei against them, not to mention herself...

Well, actually not. Damia frowned, and cursed. Sorai. The two guards would have to take her off of her hands for now. She could not afford to have Sorai around in the next little bit. That was still favorable odds, though.

"Sorai – I want you you go scouting towards the north. Take these two with you. A thorough sweep, mind. Mesau, get in the cart. Leave the kago here, and you two pick it up on your return"

Sorai raised an eyebrow slightly. She said nothing, but it was clear she was thinking that Damia did not need her to scout, if she had crow watchers at her command. It was not true, of course – one crow had been told to watch the two standing at the well, and she had just told Mesau to track the main party with the other. She did not know what lay north, towards Aizu.

"As you wish, my lady." Sorai bowed low, and without a word, took the two guards and left. Damia nodded in satisfaction – Sorai was, for now, easily dealt with.

Mesau continued to watch the two figures by the well, and then raised an eyebrow when both decided, for no apparent reason, to jump into the well.

The only possible explanation for this must be an underground passage, or cavern. Mesau told the crow circling high above t remain in place for now, and made sure to let Damia know. Behind her, Botan and Momiji began to look pale, again, but neither said anything.

The only thing to do was to hurry, and see what was in that well.

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When they arrived at the lip of the well, Damia confessed to some small amount of disappointment. It was not imposing at all. Her nose told her Sesshoumaru had been here recently...he must have flown, for only near the well did the scent remain.

There was no trail coming out of the well.

Damia motioned the cart to a halt, and smiled at Kyohei. "We get even closer."

Kyohei bowed, and then turned towards the well. "Strange they never came out. I wonder what is at the bottom." That said, he made for the opening, and peered in, frowning. Damia watched him, and as Mesau and the two miko were getting out of the cart, ready for battle.

"Theres...nothing here. It is an empty well." Kyohei dropped inside the well, and frowned. Nothing was here...was it an illusion? Mesau might be of use for once. "Have Mesau look it over for illusions."

Mesau pronounced there to be no illusions present, but...there was power of a sort here. All they could do was wait, and get into position...and hope Kagome and Sesshoumaru returned. Damia and Kyohei stood at the side of the well, with Mesau not too far away. After much deliberation, the other two miko had been told to stand near the edge of the clearing, within view. Damia had drawn most of their power to her – Mesau was left untapped for the moment.

Damia hoped they returned this way – if they did not, she was risking arriving later at Aizu than they would. Damia called out orders in preparation for Sesshoumaru and Kagome's arrival. Mesau had a task to do, and so did Kyohei.

And so, they waited – there was nothing else to do.

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When Kagome appeared inside the well, and began to stand up, Damia was on her like a thunderbolt, eyes dancing. Kagome had returned! Sesshoumaru couldn't be far behind. Damia was going to win. He would die before moon-rise, and by morning, the miko would be hers.

Damia landed heavily on the girl, stunning her, and dragged her up out of the well, expertly wrenching Kagome's hand up behind her back, locking wrist, elbow and shoulder painfully together.

Triumph.

Kagome cried out at the sudden pain, still half stunned. Things had happened so quick she was not sure what had occurred. One moment, she was falling through time, and then...The impact of something heavy, with claws that had left small trails of blood down her shoulder, and a firm hand forcing her to stay on her tiptoes to avoid shattering her right arm.

Kagome bit her lip but forced herself to stay still against the unknown youkai's armor – if she so much as moved her hand, the other woman could take her arm apart in an instant. Kagome knew jujitsu when it was used on her – it was hard not to notice.

Her bag was gone, left at the bottom of the well. Tetsusaiga had spun out of her hand, and had been dropped on the edge of the clearing, not three meters away from where she was being held. Thor...was still in the bottom of the well.

Through slightly hazy vision, Kagome watched across the well. There was another strange youkai and ...a miko?

Shit.

Mentally, Kagome swore. Miko and youkai. There were only two people who immediately sprang to mind. Damia, and Mesau. Kagome could not see the youkai holding her clearly, but she could groggily hear the orders shouted at the one called Kyohei, to watch for Sesshoumaru. Damia...this had to be Damia...oh, no...

The entire thing had taken mere seconds, but in that time, Kagome had, once again, turned into miko-in-distress. How embarrassing...

Angrily, Kagome refused to admit defeat. She couldn't let this happen! In another few seconds Sesshoumaru would come through the well, and...well. He'd probably have a better chance than she had had, but...

"You bitch! Let go of me!" Kagome scowled horrifically. She was angry enough that the language picked up from Inuyasha was showing through.

A light laugh from behind only survived to anger Kagome more. "I think not." The hand pinching her shoulder up so tightly gave a squeeze, talons pricking skin, reminding Kagome that if she did anything, moved but an inch...there went her right arm. Kagome did _not _want to see what a youkai capable of joint manipulation could do to her. She'd probably go into shock, and be useless to everyone, including herself, if her wrist, elbow and shoulder were broken by a human...a _youkai_...best not to think on it!

Distantly, Kagome could hear her name being called. She wasn't sure where the faint cries of Kagome-sama were coming from, but she pushed them from her mind. She had to concentrate.

She couldn't move...but she could still command Thor. She wasn't sure what summoning her power and scorching Damia to death would do. Last ditch attempt only. Kagome mentally rained curses on her captors head, but all the while, poked Thor into action. It wasn't quite what she had had planned, but...No!

Sesshoumaru had arrived.

Kyohei dived onto him, and Sesshoumaru only barely missed getting sliced in half with the others sword.

"Sesshoumaru!"

Sesshoumaru's head whipped around, and his eyes widened. Kagome swallowed as Damia's other hand rose towards her throat, claws drawing the faintest hint of blood. Not good, not good...

"Kagome!" Sesshoumaru's voice held a faint note of shock, as well, before he was forced to duck and counter Kyohei's attack. He could have defeated the other general, but...Kagome being held hostage had made his concentration, and resolve, waver for a few crucial seconds.

Damia! If he did defeat Kyohei...the traitor...what would Damia do to Kagome? He dreaded finding out. That hand, those claws, so near to her throat... Sesshoumaru could not stand it. Why hadn't he thought of this? Why not? It shouldn't have affected her, not like this, she _couldn't_ die because of him...

Toukijin rang slightly as he drew it from his belt, and with grim determination, blocked Kyohei's next strike. End it fast, end it fast...

Sesshoumaru came off the defensive, and pressed his attack home. Kyohei was forced to jump backwards to avoid being split from stem to stern by the overhead strike. The fight began in earnest.

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Out of the corner of her eye, Kagome could see Mesau working on...something. It couldn't be good for either of them. Trying to watch the blur of flashing metal in the field, she continued to hold deathly still. Thor...she had to get him into action. She was worse than useless, like this...so hard to think, under pressure...if she did something wrong...

The shikikami crawled up the side of the well, and oozed over to where Mesau was. Ruthlessly, Kagome told it to attack. She wished she was less tired, wished she had not spend so much time on Thor...but no undoing it now. She'd use whatever she had.

Mesau suddenly cried out as the invisible hammer of Thor fell down on her leg, smashing her kneecap. Kagome winced slightly inside. She hated doing that to anyone, let alone another human being. But...one quick glance at the rotating whirlwind in the field firmed her resolve, and long ago words from karate surfaced in her mind.

What made the best self defense wasn't know how, or technique – it was "sheer bloody mindedness and the fact that you don't just want to hurt the other person attacking you... You _**Want**_ to hurt them. Badly."

Damia stared as Mesau cried out, and dragged Kagome after her. "Mesau!" She gripped Kagome harshly, and spun her around. Kagome's right arm hung like limp noodle as she was shaken like a rag doll, and the thin connection to Thor was momentarily lost "You! Call it off. Now." The next strike she was unable to direct, and it glanced harmlessly off a rock.

"Call what off? There's nothing there, moron."

Mesau crawled backwards, eyes fixed on the place she thought Thor was. Her leg was at a funny angle, and she had to drag herself with her hands, knife still gripped tightly. Damia darted between Thor, and Mesau.

Kagome gave Damia her best death glare, and summoned as much power as she could, wishing she'd left herself some sort of reserve. Her hands glowed a violent pink, and seared Damia. From less than a meter away, Mesau jolted at the sound of her mistress under attack.

Damia howled, and her grip loosened a little, but not enough. Kagome stared kicking and yelling for all she was worth, struggling with a fierce, wild strength she didn't know she had left. Damia was _not_ going to be allowed to do this! As she struggled against Damia, Thor – not by conscious intent – began attacking Damia as well, leaving Mesau to lie broken on the ground, but still dangerous.

Kagome could feel invisible tentacles whistling overhead, leaving indentations in Damia's fancy armor. Damia struck her around the face, and in the side, but Kagome hardly noticed, only gasping harder as the wind was partially knocked out of her, continuing to blindly struggle.

Mesau gasped, and rocked back as she surveyed the scene. This was going_ wrong_. She knew her leg was broken, the kneecap shattered. She hoped the youkai healing she had gained from Damia would heal it properly later, so she would not have to limp for the rest of her life. She watched as Damia, unwilling to seriously hurt Kagome aside from extensive bruising blows quite yet, was having a hard time holding on.

Something – the same something that had begun attacking her – was helping Kagome, and Mesau did not know what it was. Damia kept striking into thin air, trying to hit it. Only the fact that she was linked to three miko was keeping Damia from being purified worse than she had been. At least the blows from the invisible thing hadn't seriously hurt her yet. She had to help Damia...

Mesau laid off preparing the knife Damia would have used on Kagome, to seal her to Damia's will, and sent a barrier towards Kagome as best she could. The younger miko did not even sense it coming, until Damia was protected against further purification, for the time being.

One great slash later, with claws extended, Damia felt the ...thing...whatever it had been, fall under her hand, caught in her claws. The unknown enemy just...collapsed.

Damia smiled as she felt the barrier settle in place. Good for Mesau. Two things down – a barrier to prevent her from being fried, and one less nuisance to deal with. A few seconds later, she saw a small slip of oddly cut paper appear from thin air, and settle slowly to the ground, neatly cut in half.

Shikikami. _Dead _shikikami, at least. Mesau was faintly impressed with Kagome's skill, and Damia simply relived.

Kagome jerked as the shock of loosing 'Thor' recoiled on her – it felt as if like someone had struck her in the face. She coughed, and could not move for a few seconds. Shit, shit... Thor...Sesshoumaru...

It was more than enough time for Damia to grab ahold of her firmly once again, and get a few solid blows in, claws retracted so as to not actually kill her. Kagome wheezed as the air was knocked out of her lungs, and she became aware that her hands were torn and bleeding from punching at armor, and that she_ hurt,_ all over...

"Give me that knife." Damia planned to _start_ the ritual, at least, before leaving Kagome with Mesau and turning towards Sesshoumaru. Kyohei was wounded badly, by now, and Sesshoumaru showed no sign of stopping. She had only seconds before he'd be on to her.

Kyohei...Damia ruthlessly squashed the regrets, and put it off for later. They had all known the risks. It was hard to lose someone like him, but she couldn't stop and reflect now.

Part of the ritual of a slave bond involved slicing Kagome's arm open from elbow to hand – the more, the better. Kagome would loose quite a bit of blood from the artery in her arm, in the process...enough to make her less of a nuisance, Damia figured, enough to slow her down. Mesau would watch her and make sure they did not lose Kagome too soon from blood loss.

Healing, youkai healing, would save Kagome's life before it was too late, but for now, Damia didn't feel at all remorseful about the action.

Served the little hellfire right for _daring_ to try and purify her!

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Sesshoumaru did not dare look at the other side of the clearing, where Mesau, two girls he did not recognize, and Damia were ranged against Kagome. Kyohei was bleeding heavily from a scalp wound – if he had ducked _any_ later, he would be missing a head by now. Sesshoumaru tried desperately to ignore the shouts and yells of pain from the other side of the clearing, could not bear to watch Kagome fighting.

At least, he thought, she was doing well. Damia sounded like Kagome had done a number on her, and Mesau was incapacitated, bleeding. For the moment, she was okay.

For the moment.

He had to get to Kagome _now_...but Kyohei just wouldn't die. The stubbornness which had once made him a good general was now an inconvenience...he couldn't let her die, couldn't, not like Rin...

Blood.

A thick smell of blood filled the air, and Sesshoumaru grew enraged.

Kagome's blood...

_No_! He did not realize he had spoken aloud, until he had paused, standing over Kyohei's prone body. The general had been sliced across the throat – he was not quite dead yet, but in another minute, Sesshoumaru guessed, he would have drowned in his own blood.

For good measure, he stabbed Kyohei, some of the rage channeled into the action, before darting off towards Damia, not even bothering to see if Kyohei was dead or not. Kagome...

Oh, gods, _Kagome_...

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_I can't remember if Botan and Momiji are sisters, or not, to be honest. It sounds better this way, so I think I'll claim artistic license and leave it that way for now, even if they really aren't. I also apologize, now and in advance, for any inconsistencies with injuries and how much it would really affect you. I know joint manipulation and effects, but I don't know how much knives would damage/slow down. I claim ignorance and artists liberty there as well (grins – and if you disagree...hehe. Jujitsu! Lol. Nah...kidding.)_

_Very...long...chapter...that jumped around a __**lot**__ initially - and I apologize for the way this chapter revolves mostly around the other characters (11 out of 15 pages are just them...), and there's hardly any mention of Kagome or Sesshoumaru directly except where the flashback to the other party catches up to them. It's mostly for plot purposes (and because I'm a windbag) – I can't think of any other time they've shown up for so long, or another time they might. I planned the last chapter and this one like this. I'll try to have the next chapter up soon,(I know, evil cliffie) but will not make any promises I cannot keep._

_**Thank you so much for the reviews! **__I'm very glad you guys didn't give up on me updating this. I'll try to finish the next chapter, but I have some other things to deal with and start work soon too._


	35. ch34:You Owe Me

**You Owe Me**

_...to recap from last time...(ducks the scary objects thrown her way for how last ch ended)_

Kagome would loose quite a bit of blood from the artery in her arm, in the process...enough to make her less of a nuisance, Damia figured. Mesau would watch her and make sure they did not lose Kagome too soon from blood loss.

Healing, youkai healing, would save Kagome's life before it was too late, but for now, Damia didn't feel at all remorseful about the action.

Served the little hellfire right for _daring_ to try and purify her!

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Blood.

A thick smell of blood filled the air, and Sesshoumaru grew enraged.

Kagome's blood...

_No_! He did not realize he had spoken aloud, until he had paused, standing over Kyohei's prone body. The general had been sliced across the throat – he was not quite dead yet, but in another minute, Sesshoumaru guessed, he would have drowned in his own blood.

For good measure, he stabbed Kyohei, some of the rage channeled into the action, before darting off towards Damia, not even bothering to see if Kyohei was dead or not. Kagome...

Oh, gods, _Kagome_...

_...and to continue..._

Damia stood over Kagome, knife a brilliant red. She'd begun the ritual simply by sliding the bade along the struggling girls arm. She would wait till Sesshoumaru was dead to finish the chant – the important part of it.

For now, having opened up that arm was enough. Kagome had curled up around her arm, face streaked with tears, and red liquid running down her side, her leg, fire trailing along her nerves with it. Damia was going to make sure Kagome wasn't going anywhere soon, and wasn't in any kind of position to cause trouble.

She had put up a good fight. Damia would give her that, but what, in the end, could a human do to a youkai like _her_? Miko were good for nothing but purifying low level youkai scum, and to help her in her goals.

"You...bitch..." Interesting. Kagome was still lucid enough to swear at her. Damia watched in some amusement as Kagome took a feeble swipe at her foot, eyes full of rage. Definitely a good catch, this Shikon miko, though disappointingly, Damia could feel no trace of the actual Shikon anywhere on Kagome's person. Damia supposed she couldn't have it all...

Stamina, and a much better fighter than any of the other miko. Damia had high hopes for Kagome, if she survived today.

Now...she had other business to attend to. Like Sesshoumaru.

Damia picked Kagome up in one hand, ignoring the humans cries of protest at being picked up by the hair, and leveled the knife at her throat. If this did not work, then she would simply leave Kagome with Mesau, and drive Sesshoumaru from the clearing. He had not seemed to realize what the two drained, nearly helpless girls by the edge of the clearing were for, yet, and she would not let him kill Mesau. Too useful – and too much of a loss for Damia.

With this much power behind her, it would be easy, even with Kagome's pathetic attempt to hurt her. Damia had already begun to heal, the power stolen from Botan and Momiji attending to it.

"Take one more step, Sesshoumaru, and the girl gets it."

Behind Damia, Mesau shook her head. Damia and dramatics...

Sesshoumaru pulled up short, 10 meters away. Damia smiled, a cold, feral thing of triumph. "That's better."

"Let her go – this is between us, and no one else." Sesshoumaru's face was cold as ice, but Damia felt a thrill of power run along her nerves. He sounded as though he couldn't care less, but...he_ had _stopped. The girl must mean something to him, hold some sort of value. Whether or not it was the same sort of value Mesau held for her, purely business and practicality, or something else, Damia did not know.

Damia's mind flashed back to the fact that Joseibi and Sesshoumaru were the same person. Kyohei...poor youkai, he had fought bravely...had told her that they were, and she had seen Joseibi transform with her own eyes when he and Kagome had come to the well. Invisible, disguised, Sesshoumaru. Sneaky bastard. That had to have been Kagome's doing.

The behavior she had seen in that time couldn't possibly be him, but it had to be. A picnic, allowing Kagome to drape herself over him...he was not **that** good an actor, surely!

The girl wasn't bonded to him, at least – she would have seen the marks by now. Perhaps he had planned to do so? Quite unlike himself.

But Kagome_ definitely_ meant something to him. And Damia could use that. She ignored the girls pained whimper, and held her up higher, ignoring the blood from the girls arm running down her claws, and Kagome's feeble attempts to apply pressure to her arm, to stop it from getting worse. Smirking, Damia turned to Sesshoumaru.

"I do not think so. There's more at stake than you and me fighting for some notion of honor, Sesshoumaru. I can't let you get in my way. Japan needs a strong leader, and you failed."

Sesshoumaru was as taught as a bow, before he forced himself to relax – he needed to be able to move fast. "And you would succeed? You're mistaken, Damia. The Purists have it wrong."

"And the Fellowship have it right?" Damia countered, cruel laughter in her face, mocking him. "I'd have thought your long _meditation_ session as a statue would have let you think, a bit. I guess I was wrong."

Kagome clutched at her arm, trying to stop it from bleeding, and worried over her leg. Damia had cut right across the thigh somewhere in the melee of flailing fists, and she couldn't reach it to stop the blood... She was loosing so much blood...she didn't quite understand what Damia was doing. Why had she deliberately, almost ritually, sliced open her arm like that? Why not just kill her right off the bat?

Kagome nearly giggled hysterically, remembering some sort of Internet joke from 7th grade. "...And remember kids, down the street, not across!" People'd think she was suicidal, back home...And...she was...a _hostage_...? How...? World was mad...Damia was mad... She couldn't think _Kagome_ would be good bait for Sesshoumaru, did she...? Her hair...Damia was pulling on it so hard...

The world was starting to get a little fuzzy around the edges, and she found it hard to follow what was going on.

Sesshoumaru bared his teeth. His hand became white knuckled where it held onto Toukijin, and Damia smiled wider. She must have hit a nerve...perhaps Mesau was right, and he _had_ been awake throughout the year underground.

"They are just as wrong. Of the lot, Tosa and Satsuma are the most sensible, and that says something. Drop Kagome, Damia. You owe me a duel." Sesshoumaru hoped against hope he could get Damia away from Kagome – if he could just do that...he had to end it quick, or she would die...he didn't want to use Tenseiga if he could avoid it, for it only worked once...

Damia laughed at him. "You're in no position to be making demands, Sesshoumaru. But tell you what – I will agree. My rules."

Sesshoumaru nodded. "Fine. What are the terms?" He just hoped they weren't _too _outrageous...

Damia smiled. Kagome definitely was important, if he was willing to do _that_...

Time to up the stakes. Damia 'dropped' Kagome in a heap, and kicked her to one side where she lay, stunned, in the opposite direction from Mesau.

Mesau grimaced. She'd have to drag herself over there, now...with a shattered kneecap. Great.

Kagome gasped as the pressure on her hair was released, and the kick to the ribs drove the air from her lungs. She could feel blood flowing from a scalp wound, dimply, and running down her face. Her kimono miko top was _ruined_...she felt almost like laughing hysterically again. Such a silly thing to worry about right now..!

...What was going on...? Kagome groaned, but could not even lift her head. Dimly, she sensed Mesau crawling over towards her, and beyond her, two shapes in white, lying on the grass...she had to do something about this arm, she was bleeding out too fast...healing, healing...she had to do something...

"Kagome-sama...Kagome-sama..."

Kagome didn't know who it was, who was trying to reach her...her whole body hurt like hell, and she couldn't move her right arm, or her leg...so tired...Was it nighttime already? Things were getting darker...

The world fuzzily began to swim in and out of focus, as Kagome's bloody fingers curled limply around her arm, with not even enough strength to apply much pressure, let alone heal with power. She didn't have nearly the concentration to do it...

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Sesshoumaru started when Damia carelessly dropped Kagome, and she could feel the low growl in his throat, but he did not dare move towards her for fear Damia would think Kagome was important, and do worse. She was closer to Kagme than he was – which ws bad.

Too late. Damia had no intentions of letting this become a fair fight. And Kagome was, she had seen, as much of a weakness for Sesshoumaru as Rin had been.

Perhaps she had laid plans better than she knew – those rumors of a human lover might even be true!

"Drop Toukijin. And Tenseiga." Damia smiled. "Because I am feeling generous, I will allow you to use Tetsusaiga." She had recognized the sword Kagome had dropped. It wouldn't even let him hold onto it without scorching his fingers. "Between us two only, no outside interference."

He couldn't use Tetsusaiga – everyone at the Western court knew it, though none had dared to comment. His fathers sword was warded against him. And no outside interference would prevent him from killing her pet miko. Damia felt rather good about the days events, aside from loosing Kyohei. That made her just the tiniest bit _angry_...

Sesshoumaru's face darkened. "You ask for much." She had stacked the odds quite deliberately. But...Sesshoumaru glanced at Kagome, lying on the ground.

He had to do it – he _did _want revenge, but right now, surviving long enough to save Kagome was more important. He dreaded to think what might happen to her if he died and left her in their hands.

Slowly, he took off Tenseiga, and Toukijin.

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Sorai hid the frown on her face as she continued to follow the parties trail back from the dropped kago. The two guards carried it behind her, and all three went at a good clip. Something told her that she should head back sooner than intended...

Sorai listened to that 'something,' on the rare occasion it was present. Premonition had never led her wrong, and she had had a bad feeling about this whole trip.

Luckily the two guards Damia had picked to accompany her remembered the days when she had been spymistress. It had taken only a slight suggestion, and they had gone along with her wish to return sooner. There was no real reason not to, to be honest.

The trail they were following did not head towards Aizu, and showed some evidence of haste. Sorai continued to hide her frown, masking her emotions. She wondered what Mesau had seen that had caused them to change course like that. She hadn't been let in on that little secret.

Damia didn't trust her. Sorai had been willing, at first, to give her a chance, but Damia was a lost cause. Loyalty was a two way street. Sesshoumaru had always been willing to listen – Sorai would have walked through fire for him, even if he hadn't been her lord. He'd made her family, poor and hunted when they came here from the continent, prosperous again. She owed him a lot.

The trail led towards Edo, though why it did so was beyond Sorai at the moment. No doubt she would find out soon – they had to be getting closer to the party. That cart full of miko would slow them down.

Sorai sped up the pace, trying to get there sooner. The two guards behind her were loyal to her, enough that they followed.

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Damia thumbed loose her own sword, and moved away from Mesau, and the two other miko, who were hovering over the badly injured Kagome anxiously. The fight didn't need to include them.

She tried to draw a little more power from the other two miko – if they were up and about, then they had strength to spare. A gratifying trickle more flowed into her, renewing and exceeding bounds. A sharp gasp, and a distant thump made her grin a bit. Served them right for trying to move towards Kagome. She'd deal with them – later.

Fingers half closed around the hilt of her katana, and her other hand turned the saya so that it was at the perfect angle for a quick draw, easing it forwards in her belt. Delicately, she set her stance and balanced on the balls of her feet, ready for action, sword still in the sheath, waiting. A quick draw, and sudden death was what she hoped for.

Slowly, Sesshoumaru was making his way over to where Tetsusaiga had been dropped, ignoring the now-dead Kyohei. Tenseiga and Toukijin lay neatly stacked, by the well. He could feel Damia's eyes on his back, following him. He had to end this quickly, as fast as he could. Iaido would have been perfect for this, especially since that's what Damia was doing, but...

Kagome... Sesshoumaru silently cursed the lack of an arm. To properly draw a sword and strike from the sheath, for Iaido, one needed both arms. _Damn_ Inuyasha...and his sword! The beastly blade hated him, and he regretted that more that ever, now. He reached down for it, inwardly wincing. He couldn't even pick it up...without...pain...

Sesshoumaru's eyes widened slightly in surprise as he reached for the sword, and found it did not burn.

'_Why...?_' No matter. All that mattered was that he had a sword that would work! He needed some way to save Kagome, and this was it. There was no question of winning or losing – he simply would win. He _had_ to, now.

But Damia did not need to know Tetsusaiga wasn't burning his hand. Sesshoumaru let a faint grimace slide onto his face. It wasn't hard to do – one had been trying to appear for quite a while, competing with the death glare for space on his face.

Tetsusaiga was pulled clear of its sheath, and held before him, ready, waiting. Each taiyoukai faced the other across the field, measuring the other up. Sesshoumaru hoped he was still the faster of the two. He would have to move back, out of range, and get Damia into a position that was to his advantage.

They stayed that way for a while, each measuring the other. Damia's sword remained in its sheath, ready to be drawn in one killing stroke, in the second when they crossed blades. Tetsusaiga remained in his fist, waiting.

Sesshoumaru watched, and waited, grimace of faint concentration still in place. All the while, he was mourning each passing second. The longer he waited, the more blood Kagome lost. Dimly, he was aware of the two girls he had seen before trying to reach her.

They seemed...like they knew her. Sesshoumaru wanted to know more, wanted to know why 'Kagome-sama' but didn't dare break his concentration on the deadly youkai before him, even to save her. Damia would see, and strike.

Damia watched him with a smile, nearly a smirk, of confidence on her face. Her eyes had darted to his hand, once - she must surely think he was in pain, was unable to use the sword, that he could barely hold it.

Sesshoumaru had not let it transform, yet. He was put in mind of how his brother had surprised him, and how it had cost him an arm to so underestimate an opponent.

Perhaps he could do the same...

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Mesau winced as her shattered kneecap sent another shooting pain through her leg, and bit back the words, and tears. Time for that later. She watched from the corner of her eye as the two youkai faced each other, and then turned back to her task of reaching Kagome, and preparing for later, for once Sesshoumaru was dead.

There was very little doubt in her mind that that was how this would end. Mesau laboriously dragged herself over to the bloody form on the grass, before stopping.

Momiji and Botan, too, were trying to reach Kagome, and slowly but surely, succeeding. Each young face bore guilt, and desperation. They really must hold Kagome in high regard...

Mesau shook her head, and struggled forwards, leg dragging, picking up the knife that Damia had discarded along the way. She would need it later.

"Kagome-sama! Kagome-sama!" Botan had reached the fallen miko's side, and had managed to get there from across the grass.

Mesau was a few meters away still. Damia had kicked Kagome away in the wrong direction, away from Mesau, not closer to her.

Botan looked up from Kagome's too-white face, and saw Mesau advancing. She did not know what the older miko intended to do, but...Kagome needed help. She was barely breathing, very shallow, and far too pale. Now. She needed help _now_...Mesau or no Mesau, something had to be done!

Damia had stripped away the two miko's power, for the most part, and a great deal of strength, stolen it. Botan had never felt so weak and useless in her life – worse than a day old kitten.

But she wasn't about to let that stop her, and her sister wasn't, either. As one, Momiji and Botan desperately began to go to work, pulling Kagome's sleeve away from her arm, to try and do something anything! So much blood...the smell of it hit her, and she coughed. So much...

Momiji began whispering slowly as they pulled away the red, wet fabric – words she had long ago used to sooth injured patients at the shrine. Botan's voice joined hers, and together, they tried to do what they could. It would not be much, for they were unnaturally exhausted, but for Kagome-sama...

With trembling hands, Botan tore up strips of cloth from her robes, tied them off with hesitant motions. Kagome had not moved since they had reached her – only the faint glitter of an eye and her shallow breathing told them that Kagome was still alive.

Mesau stopped her advance, and watched the two teary nurses, torn.

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Sorai's nose twitched. Faintly, ever so faintly, she could smell blood on the wind. She stopped, and the two guards behind her did as well. Her nose twitched slightly, and Sorai determined that the trail she followed came from the same direction as the blood-smell.

Human blood, though she couldn't tell much more than that, at this distance. Grimly, Sorai began to run again.

"Hurry. I do not know what Damia has gotten into, but I wish to find out."

Why was there blood? Was it simply that some unfortunate farmer had been in the wrong place at the wrong time?

As she got closer and closer, Sorai began to discredit that notion. It was too far from human civilization for most. Afraid of youkai, humans did not usually come this way. There might be a darker explanation.

So why...?

Sorai determined that she was going to scout the area before letting Damia know of her return. Something wasn't right.

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Sesshoumaru felt a small, thin droplet of sweat fall from his hairline, and slowly, slowly, run down his face. The cool wind from the clouds picked up, and he felt it against his wet skin.

Kagome...from the corner of his eye, Sesshoumaru anxiously noted the two shapes bent over her, desperately calling her name, and smelled the salt of human tears.

Grimly, he shifted his grip on Tetsusaiga ever so slightly, eyes narrowed, face openly black, darker than the clouds overhead.

"Damia..."

Across the clearing, Damia smiled.

And everything...froze, in the instant before she drew her blade.

Sesshoumaru slowly, agonizingly slowly, unleashed the fang, and barely managed to half block, half dodge the strike, stumbling out of the way. A red, shallow slash across part of his chest bore testimony to how close it had been.

And then everything sped up, tumbled out of molasses time, and for the next few seconds he blocked on pure instinct, eyes registering the change in shoulder and armpit with barely time to move Tetsusaiga to block Damia's furious movement.

Wingblock, slash, overhead, dodge...

Sesshoumaru grimaced as he realized he was being pressed back, was loosing ground. Slowly, Damia was forcing him away from the clearing, away from Kagome. No! He couldn't allow that to happen...!

He tried to strike faster, tried to turn the fight around, go on the offensive, but Damia was forcing him back – she was strong, much stronger than he remembered, faster...it became all blood, and heat and hair, panting breath, sweaty palm.

Desperate, Sesshoumaru fought back with a furious energy. He couldn't allow her to take away Kagome...!

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Sorai's nose flared as a new wave of blood washed over her, ad she almost paused in mid stride in complete shock.

Sesshoumaru...?

Was that...him? He was dead...!

...but if he was truly dead, then who's blood was that on the wind, mixed with the scent of a half dead human woman?

Sorai's eyes, wide with shock, narrowed.

Damia was definitely up to something. And it did not, from all indication, seem to be something honorable. It was something deep, and dark – a secret. She had purposely sent Sorai away. A strange woman, and Sesshoumaru, both wounded from the smell of things...

One did not keep secrets from Sorai. For that alone, this bore a closer look, never mind the rest.

"Sorai?" Sorai glanced over her shoulder at the nearest guard. "Are we nearly there?"

"We're getting close. I don't know about you, but I want to find out what Damia thinks she's doing. Follow my lead."

Sorai grimly pressed on, stopping not too far away from the clearing up ahead, the faint sounds of fight and clashing steel. Then, she began a slow, stealthy advance, the two guards close behind.

It couldn't be Sesshoumaru...could it?

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Kagome moaned, softly. A red and blue blur was saying something. And she didn't know what. And it _hurt._..she hurt all over...

There was something...she had to do. Yes. Something. Kagome tried to focus, tried to remember. She could feel her left hand, but her right was tarred with ice, numb, throbbing.

There was something about a sword, and a jewel, and a pair of golden eyes...

"Kagome? Kagome? Please, don't go, stay awake..."

But she was sleepy... The red white and blue blur was silly, she just wanted a nap, maybe it would all go away...

Dimly, she could feel herself shivering – the wind had picked up, a faint prediction of the autumn frost in its chill fingers. So...tired...

Botan shook her head, eyes wet. She dried them on her blue sleeves, and continued to work, kept trying bandages onto Kagome's bloodied arm. She was so pale...

Desperately, she kept trying. She couldn't loose Kagome because of a mistake, because of her and Momiji's being dumb enough to let her identity slip. Beside her, Momiji worked furiously, trying to call up the last dregs of spiritual power and letting them work, trying to fix the wound stretching up from Kagome's wrist, towards her elbow, still leaking red whatever they did.

Across from them, Mesau sat and watched, stricken with guilt. It was a pitiful sight to watch. She had gathered together her own power – some of it had been lent to Damia, but she had enough to keep Kagome alive, just. Carefully, she continued to send a stream of spiritual energy towards Kagome.

The girl was fading in and out – holding up not too bad, all things considered. Mesau thought that by now, quite a few would have died. Kagome's own powers – and stubbornness – were feeding on the scraps of power Mesau was sending towards her, tenaciously clinging to life.

Mesau wondered how long it could last.

Eventually, Damia would have to finish the ritual – Kagome was fast slipping beyond Mesau's own ability to heal. She could only keep her alive for so long... A youkai's strength was what she needed, now – or a miko of Midoriko's ability and strength.

Perhaps if Damia had not stripped away the three miko's power, they might have done it. Little else could save her. Mesau just hoped she could keep her alive long enough for Damia to attend to it, or they'd have a body on their hands.

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Sesshoumaru looked across the clearing, from behind the crossed swords and paled. Kagome was still bleeding out, she was running out of time, every second he wasted she was slipping, and she had...

...She had stopped moving.

No! Not Kagome. Not Kagome...

Sesshoumaru struck upwards, and unleashed Tetsusaiga, furious, eyes red with anger, more afraid than he had ever been. Kagome...

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_Iaido - drawing from the sheath in a single killing cut – similar to battoujutsu, for the Kenshin fans. (grins) The rest of you – hope that makes it clearer. _

_And if anyone knows the line I nicked off C.S Lewis, Kudos. (loves that quote. It's Perfect.)_

_Many __**many **__apologies for last chapters evil cliffie – some of you sounded worried over Kagome (grin) – and for the fact that Kagome got beaten up rather a lot, too. (winces) Hopefully I didn't antagonize anyone, and I wish I could do what I'm scheming another way (believes one should know how to take care of oneself. Yay for the red belt I have! And the new shiny sword, which will start learning about this summer!), but...bah. She did, to her credit, get Mesau pretty good. A shattered kneecap isn't bad – Mesau's in no position to do anything right now. Damia...well, she did try. _

_And...Sorry for the continued cliffie. (if I was __**really**__ mean, it would have stopped where Damia smiled and drew her sword...lol) And the lateness of this. Sorry in general – a blanket apology. Just got a job – life busy. Again. Or continues to be. Not sure which. I'll try to update fast._

_**Thank you for all the reviews**__, though! (huge grin) I love you guys!_


	36. Ch35:Run Like Hell

**Disclaimer**: I snitched a line or two from Blake. Yay me. Yay for not owning anything. Lastly, and most importantly, yay for 'Not Getting Sued.'

**:: Run like Hell ::**

_To recap...(decides __**not **__to duck the scary objects thrown for not updating – and does a fancy aerial roundhouse! Hiyaaa!)_

_(thunk)_

_(bonk)_

_(...ouch.)_

_-(huh? Was that a __**whip**__ that went sailing by? O.o Ahhhh!!!!! (runs))-_

_Sesshoumaru looked across the clearing, from behind the crossed swords and paled. Kagome was still bleeding out, she was running out of time, every second he wasted she was slipping, and she had..._

_...She had stopped moving._

_No! Not Kagome. Not Kagome..._

_Sesshoumaru struck upwards, and unleashed Tetsusaiga, furious, eyes red with anger, more afraid than he had ever been. Kagome..._

_-and to continue...-_

Tetsusaiga struck something, and clanged, and dimly, Sesshoumaru could sense another body in the clearing. That was too much, even for him.

If it was reinforcements, he was doomed – and more importantly, _Kagome_ was.

He didn't even look to see what damage he had done striking at Damia, didn't think at all – he just ran.

Nothing mattered now except for the pale, pale form on the ground he was headed for, hair sweaty and hanging around her face, wisps hanging in in the wind, snow white, blood red...

Clutching the transformed fang, he shoved it roughly in his waistband, not caring that the now-rust blade had scratched him, not caring that Damia's blood was getting on him from the uncleaned blade, hardly noticing the small nicks and cuts he had gathered during the brief fight – for it had only taken a few seconds, though he felt it had lasted much longer - and scooped Kagome up in his one hand, breaking into a dead run.

All that mattered was getting Kagome out of there. Sesshoumaru held her tightly, gently, firm and close as he leap off the ground, and launched himself into the air.

No looking back – he would be slowed enough by the fact he was carrying the limp form in his arm. Looking back when you ran only slowed you down, disrupted the rhythm of the world, of what the world shrank to when you ran – breathing and blood pumping through you, the one two of one foot before the other.

He couldn't call up the white light – that would take too much energy, and he didn't have that luxury. Damia could be right on his heels. Getting away, fast. Most important thing right now.

Don't think, _do_.

So Sesshoumaru did; he ran.

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Mesau shouted as Sesshoumaru bounded past her, catching up Kagome and running flat out. The tenuous link that had been holding her to Kagome snapped back at her, and Mesau groaned.

She could already feel the headache the backlash was going to give her. That, and Sesshoumaru had, unknowingly, just taken Kagome away from Mesau – the one who was keeping her alive.

Not only were the two miko concerned for the Shikon miko...but apparently, so was Sesshoumaru.

"Oh, the _fool_..." Mesau was concerned, just a bit. She did not like harming anyone, and she had felt more than guilty on seeing the two younger miko. Kagome would die, now – she didn't want that to happen. Damia didn't either, Mesau reflected, but her motives differed.

Momiji and Botan stared at Sesshoumaru's retreating back, eyes wide. "He...he took her! Kagome!"

Mesau covered her head in her hands. "Yes, he did." Poor Kagome...there went a strong miko who could have gone a long ways...

Damia was _not _going to be pleased...

She'd see the situation as simply Sesshoumaru gone, though at least he'd looked wounded when he left. Kagome gone, likely dead without someone to keep her alive.

...Not according to plan. Not at all.

Across the splash of crimson on the ground that Kagome had left behind, Mesau watched Botan and Momiji. Neither looked well – both were quite upset. She was a bit upset as well, but she hid it much better. She wished things had turned out differently.

Mesau groaned, and then swore softly as she glanced back towards Damia. The taiyoukai stood against another foe – Sorai. And the two guards. Her mistresses arm was dripping blood, and the chest plate was askew. Sesshoumaru had actually managed to damage it a fair bit.

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Sorai's eyes widened as Sesshoumaru's sword...Tetsusaiga? More mysteries...swept up to block Damia's attack, rusted blade sending sparks flying.

He wasn't dead. Damia had _lied!_

Sorai's pale golden eyes narrowed through the bushes. Regicide was an accepted method of promotion – but Sesshoumaru wasn't dead. Yet. She could see Kyohei awkwardly sprawled to one side not too far from her, and knew him for deceased. She hadn't been too close to him – it didn't break her up much.

She turned to the guards behind her. "What do you think?" Were they with Damia...or Sesshoumaru? She knew who she would stand by. The question was...

"Lady, I think...he needs help." The closest one whispered hesitantly. "She..."

"Good enough. He needs help now, not talk. Mesau's down. Take Damia's flanks." Short, and terse.

Sorai darted from the bushes, nearly getting hit by an enormous, suddenly transformed fang as she rushed towards Sesshoumaru. _'Why the fang works now, I__** don't**__ know...'_ before dodging back out of reach, and then striking. Damia barely had enough time to turn from Sesshoumaru to Sorai, eyes wide with surprise. Damia's arm was dripping from the gash Sesshoumaru had left on it, leading into a shallower cut across her shoulder. Sesshoumaru had marked her.

Sorai felt like cheering.

"Sorai!" Damia sounded both surprised, and angry, but there wasn't time for more than that to be seen.

Blades rang – the two guards were right behind her, attacking from either side. Sorai had just enough time to register that Sesshoumaru was...running away...? Before she became unable to follow, too absorbed in what Damia was doing, trying to block, counter, move out of the way.

Sorai knew she was no match for Damia dead on – the older youkai had always easily beaten her at practice. Sorai was smaller, and lighter – more a planner than a fighter, though she wasn't helpless. But if Sesshoumaru was running -why, she didn't know – then all she needed was a distraction. They could both get away. She would gladly give her life to ensure Sesshoumaru's escape – but not if it wasn't needed. Sorai suspected she would be of more use alive.

He had changed. Sesshoumaru would never have run before. But...yet...here he was running, the bloody human she had smelled earlier held awkwardly in one arm.

Very...very..._strange._

Sorai had never had any hesitations in cutting her losses – once Sesshoumaru was safe, she'd run like hell too. Youkai refugees from China hadn't had the luxury of pride – she had learned to be efficient, not honorable. "Go! Hold her as long as you can!" Those guards had to help her, or she'd be dead as well. Distantly, she caught a fleeting glimpse of retreating silver and white – Sesshoumaru was pulling away and wasting no time. In another moment, she could make her escape.

The guards split to take the flanks of the fight – one cried out as a sword caught him under the ribs, and he stumbled, the other one circling and darting in, stinging Damia on the side, sparks flying from amour and sword.

The fallen guard was too slow getting up after that fall – Damia reached over and slashed him brutally across the neck. Arteries wept – the guard was dead in seconds. His companion cried out, and charged, enraged.

Sorai was sorry for the death, but it gave her enough time to run – and to head towards Mesau and the two other miko.

Sorai wanted – no_, needed_ - information...and she wanted it now. Those two miko would help her – she knew they bore no love for Damia, or Mesau, their captors. She needed to know what was happening, and where to get reinforcements. Either miko was a good source of information, if she could take one with her. Hopefully she would not be slowed too much in the escape – it was a calculated risk. Run and get clear, and be clueless, or have a better chance of finding out and take the risk of being caught.

If those two guards just bought her enough time...She had already managed to distract the enraged Damia enough to let Sesshoumaru, and the unknown mortal, escape. Now she had to find a way to help beyond that.

Underneath it all, her mind was boiling with questions; how long had they known he was alive? Where had Sesshoumaru been? Why hadn't she known? Foul play? Sorai set the questions aside for later; now was not the time.

"You're coming with me. Quickly!" Sorai reached down and looked hard at Botan, the nearer of the two miko, grabbing her firmly by the forearm. "I need help."

"Help...?" Botan stared at her though tear streaked eyes. "...you want...help?"

"Just come!" Sorai pulled on the the outstretched, bloodied arm of the girl and swung her onto her back, already jumping away from the clearing. Botan gasped, and awkwardly grabbed ahold of the light armor Sorai wore, eyes bewildered.

Behind her, Sorai heard the sounds of conflict, and hoped that the last guard had not fallen, had escaped, had bought her enough time to get away. She did not want more death.

Distantly, a scream of rage could be heard.

Apparently, Damia was not amused.

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Sorai crashed though the trees, running as fast as she could manage – not quite a full out sprint, but close, a pace she could maintain for a little while. Enough to get clear. On her back, Botan clung to her as best she could, still shaking from exhaustion and tears.

Sorai wished she would be quiet – who knew if Damia was close behind them or not? - but said nothing. Even if she mentioned the fact the miko was making a lot of noise, she doubted the noise level would drop, and it would earn her no favors from the other girl. She hoped being kind would be enough to get the information the young miko held, and she would not have to resort to something harsher.

Sorai really wanted to ask why she was so upset – something had happened, and she was itching to know what it was, but...she needed to save her breath for moving.

Sorai had no real direction or travel – other than the fact that Tosa and Satsuma were in the general region of human Edo.

She wondered if they knew of Sesshoumaru's miraculous reappearance, or not. Tanuma might have known. He was almost as good as her.

She hoped they knew – she could ask for their help. Or she could trade knowledge, and they might help. Something. Tanuma had been – and was – a rival in her world, but a respected one on both sides. The great game, some called it – Sorai would believe it. Trying to outfox a kitsune...they each respected the other, and hopefully that would be enough.

She missed the 'old days,' when Sesshoumaru had ruled. Life was a lot simpler in some ways then...

But Sorai was not fool enough to realize it would always be like that. She just hoped she'd be able to come out right in the end.

She kept running, hoping that soon, she would be able to either reach safety, or the Souther party headed for Aizu.

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Mesau groaned as she tried to crawl closer to Momiji – the younger miko would have none of it, and moved away at nearly a snails pace, throwing Mesau a dirty, accusatory look though her tears. Mesau's knee was throbbing, and it felt as though her whole leg was falling off. Mesau stopped, and shut her eyes. Before she had been too busy to really notice the pain – she had been able, to some extent, t shut it off. But now...

She gasped as Damia suddenly drew on her, using her own power, and winced as the other guard was efficiently hacked in half.

Damia was definitely stacking up the bodies today. Kyohei was dead by Sesshoumaru's hand, but Kagome and the two – highly skilled and difficult to replace – guards as well were her own doing.

That was unfortunate – Mesau knew how long it had Taken Sorai to find the one guard who had just been killed. It had taken years for the former spy mistress to get such a skilled person on the staff.

Too bad, really.

"Mesau!" Mesau winced as Damia's angry voice cut though her thoughts. "Where's that miko?"

"Sorai...she took Botan when she escaped, my lady." Mesau bowed her head as best she could, not looking up as she heard Damia approach. Out of the corner of her eyes she could see the blade Damia carried flick – a quick shake of the wrist to clean it of blood before it was sheathed.

Overhead, the clouds began to churn, and to grow darker with both twilight, and the coming storm.

"That's Sesshoumaru, the Shikon miko, _and_ the new miko you've let escape today." Mesau did not dare look up, bu the cool, extra crisp voice let her know how displeased Damia was with her. "And Kyohei dead. I can't send him after Sorai while we find Sesshoumaru."

"We...are going after him, Damia?"

"Of course." Damia stated the remark like it was obvious. And to her, it was obvious. Damia was unable to go after both Sorai and Sesshoumaru at the same time. Sorai was uninjured, and even with that miko – who Damia could still draw upon, but less so, with the increasing distance – she doubted they'd catch her and Sesshoumaru. So – best to focus on what she could salvage of this fiasco.

Sesshoumaru had to die – that was all she could think to do. Damia didn't know where Sorai was – she could not even track more than a vague sense of direction from the miko Sorai had stolen. They had gone south, and a bit east. Or perhaps Sorai had discarded the miko, and it was a misdirection; with Sorai, it was possible that that was the only reason she had taken Botan with her.

Best to focus on one goal, the most important one. Sesshoumaru.

Damia felt angered by Mesau's inability to stop Sesshoumaru, and more so, angry with herself. She should have been able to take him. Just a few more seconds...

And then he had unleashed Tetsusaiga on her! Damia was still mystified as to how _that_ had happened. Perhaps the Shikon miko had told him its secret. Regardless...Damia had been careless enough to get herself injured. That was unforgivable.

"Momiji – get back in the cart." Damia reluctantly released some of the girls power to her. Momiji was forced to obey, clearly not happy with that fact. Damia drew as much as she could from Botan, over the distance, and then turned to Mesau. She was still angry with the older miko as well. Mesau had allowed herself to be crippled at a crucial time. That was also unforgivable, and easier to lash out about.

"I don't have enough time to do this properly. The knee's shattered, and it would have to be set. I don't know how to do it."

Mesau looked up at her. Damia's feral smile grew fixed. The human dared to look up at her like that, in hope?

"I do not think I could set it myself my lady, not with any amount of speed."

"Then live with that knee for now – I'll get it started enough so that you're not totally useless." She wanted – very badly – to leave Mesau to cope with the shattered knee, and the pain, as punishment, but realized it wouldn't be very useful. Mesau was incompetent enough without an injury to slow her down. "Later, in Aizu, you may seek out a healer and get it done properly. This will do for now."

Reluctantly, Damia released the hold she had over Mesau's miko power – and then began feeding a little of her own back towards the miko. Mesau could not draw on it, but Damia could choose to lend a little of it for times like these.

Damia could feel her arm's healing slow as she did this, but it could not be helped. Having Momiji for both of them to draw on was helping a bit, but not enough.

"Get in the cart – we're going to follow Sesshoumaru, run him to ground, and finish him off. I don't like loose ends behind me." After he was dealt with, she'd see if there was enough time to deal with Sorai – another dangerous loose end.

Relentlessly, Damia began to make ready to leave the clearing, not looking back at the old well, and the peaceful meadow that had become a battle field. She wasn't going to think about the bother of replacing those guards, now, or the shaken feeling she had acquired after Sorai's betrayal, and Kyohei's death.

She collected the swords laying around the clearing, and smiled, a cold, hard, bitter grin. The blades were added to the cart, and then her own personal belongings were dealt with. Damia adjusted her own sword in its sheath, setting it for easy travel, not bothering to loosen the guard.

Mesau crawled into the cart – reluctantly, Damia lent a hand to make sure that the injured woman actually could get into the cart. The instant she was safely in the vehicle, Damia took off, following Sesshoumaru's escape route through the trees. She could only hope that he hadn't gone far – she couldn't hope to match his speed with the two humans to drag along behind her.

One could only hope to salvage something of this...

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Sesshoumaru's breath came in short gasps as he loped though the gathering wind, heading towards the dark clouds. Clasped against his chest, Kagome's breathing could be heard, faintly, but far, far too shallow for his liking.

He guessed they had come quite far, by now. He hoped, prayed, that Damia and reinforcements were not hot on the trail. If they were...well.

In that case,** kuso**.

Sesshoumaru took stock of his own situation, and resources, while he ran. There hadn't been time to think of that till now, but best he do so.

He wasn't too badly hurt. A few wounds on his outer forearm, and on a thigh. The armor was dented; how that had happened, he didn't know. A scrape on his scalp stung, but hadn't done much other than make his hair a frightful red mess in the back. Already, the wound had begun to close and slow, leaving behind only the messy evidence.

He was tired, though, and far from calm. That was both slowing him, and delaying further healing. It definitely did not bode well for any further fighting. What he really needed was a place to stop and rest for the night. Whether he would be able to get that, he didn't know.

Sesshoumaru then glanced down at his sash, where Tetsusaiga was currently banging against his thigh. The rusted blade had Damia's blood on it, but not a large amount. He'd only scratched her. Just enough to get her mad...

Much stronger than the smell of Damia's blood though, was Kagome's. And it was also much ore worrisome.

Sesshoumaru hadn't analyzed her situation very much till now – he'd been too focused on getting away. He should fix that...

He looked down at Kagome's small, pale face, and saw her closed eyes, lashes sometimes flickering. The wounds down her right forearm were...worrisome. Something like that would have slowed even him a bit, let alone a much more fragile human.

A few colorful blotches were scattered here and there, just starting to become colorful bruises. Aside form the bloody sleeve on the right, her chest was unmarked, and the other wounds were not bad in and of themselves. It was more the fact that there were so many of them...

Sesshoumaru's fingers curled in tighter just a little bit. More fragile...she was much more fragile than he was. And a fine job he'd done of protecting her, he thought bitterly. So much for _that_ noble thought.

"...that...you...Sesshoumaru?" Kagome's voice was faint, but the keen ears of an Inuyoukai could still hear the faint whisper. Sesshoumaru slowed down as much as he dared, ears open for any sound of pursuit behind him.

She wasn't as bad as he had thought, he hoped, if she could still talk...

The wind around him blew harder, tiny flecks of drizzle splattering on his nose. Sesshoumaru grimaced as he realized that the night was going to be a rainy one.

Kuso.

"Yes, Kagome?"

"...so...cold." Kagome was shivering, he realized, though it was hard to tell. She barely had the energy even for that. He slowed further, and stopped. It was now obvious to him that she could not be carried much further, and in a cold sweat, he realized that he could nearly smell the death on her. He could have managed the trip, but it was unlikely she would be able to.

He stopped, and gently put Kagome down, hand shaking. She couldn't...she couldn't go. If anyone was going to die, it ought not be her! Damia would be his first pick, but if need be, he should have taken that blow...

Sesshoumaru was worried. Kagome couldn't go away like Rin had. That wold be another death on his conscience, another death that he should have stopped, should have prevented...Rin...he hadn't been able to save Rin, not even with Tenseiga...

But Kagome wasn't dead yet. Sesshoumaru took some comfort from that, though the worry in his mind didn't fade.

"You are cold?" Sesshoumaru's large, fluffy tail immediately wrapped itself around the tiny miko, shielding her from wind, rain and the black of night. "Kagome?" His voice shook, a little, but at least Sesshoumaru was able to force his hand to be steady, gently tucking away a stray bit of fur, and brush dark strands of hair away from Kagome's eyes.

"...cold."

Kagome wanted to tell him that she was cold, that he shouldn't worry, that she was just cold and it would be all fine. Vaguely, she wondered where Damia had gotten to...

The last little bit was a blur. She remembered two white and blue shapes heading towards her, and feeling very tired; and then, she felt a bit – not better, if anything, her arm felt worse - but more with it.

Not_ much_ more, granted, but enough that she'd begun to recognize what was happening, enough that everything wasn't a white, hazy blur. Sesshoumaru had been fighting with Damia, and...Momiji and Botan were there? Mesau was helping, healing her? Kagome wasn't sure if that was what had happened, or if she'd begun hallucinating. A possibility, her mind suggested clinically from a distant corner of thought.

Why the red and white priestesses were there she couldn't begin to guess, but Mesau – as the stout, older miko whose knees she'd totaled must surely be – healing her? Kagome? Enemy? It made no sense.

Her head was pounding. Maybe she had been hallucinating then.

Sesshoumaru – he was here. Kagome smiled a bit. He was there when she needed him, now, wasn't he? She wondered why he wasn't fighting Damia, then shrugged it off. Maybe they'd won? That would be nice...she smiled a bit wider, happy for him, happy that he was here, happy she wasn't alone.

Strange, to say she was happy...tough perhaps that wasn't the best word. It was more that she was...content. Although she could wish for less bruises and wounds...

Kagome tried to move her arm, and groaned as the nerves running along the inside of her forearm screamed at her. The bundle of neurons controlling her hand were completely numb, thankfully, but she couldn't close her fingers. She tried to move her other arm, but was unable to get it to move further than an inch, fingers outstretched before they curled back into a bloody, limp claw.

...now, where was she...? Why was Sesshoumaru peering at her like that...?

Oh, good, maybe he'd beaten Damia, she thought fuzzily again...

Kagome blinked as a raindrop hit her on the nose, and she looked out from her furry nest of tail at Sesshoumaru's worried face. She wanted to tell him he looked odd, like that, but somehow, couldn't find the energy to say much more than 'cold.' She wondered why she was getting the privilege of being wrapped in this luxurious mantle, but didn't ask. It was enough to be there.

"Sesshoumaru? Where...are we? Damia..."

He glanced around, concern and wariness on his features. "I don't know. I had to get you out of there. She could be behind us, but I don't know"

Kagome smiled softly, and slowly, she tried to reach out a hand from the midst of her blanket. She was still so tired...whatever that sustaining energy from earlier had been, it was fast going, leaving her even more tired than before. Even Sesshoumaru's concerned face swam in an out of focus. So Damia wasn't gone, yet...but she was sure Sesshoumaru would beat her. He was going to win.

She wanted to say good luck, to tell him that she was sure he'd so it, but no sound came out, just a faint movement of lips.

Kagome's eyes flitted to her arm, and the soft smile turned into a rueful one, a regret.

'_So this is it._' Rain fell on her face, as she distantly considered the possibility that _she_ was going to die, not Sesshoumaru. It seemed silly somehow. Everything seemed silly and far off, like a bubble...

Kagome hadn't ever thought of dieing. It was very silly. Maybe this was all a dream...

...no, it _hurt_ far too much to be a dream. Her arm felt, where she_ could_ still feel it, like it had been dipped in napalm. The skin howled and burned, and Kagome was too tired to do more than ride it out, and sink.

Sesshoumaru watched as Kagome's eyes started to drop closed again, and he roughly leaned forwards and shook her good shoulder. "Kagome. Kagome!" _'Don't fall asleep on me,'_ he wanted to plead,_ 'or you just might not wake up...' _and he didn't want that, he didn't want that at all... even Tenseiga...Rin had been too far gone for Tenseiga, but...

_Tenseiga_.

Sesshoumaru's eyes went wide with shock as he remembered _exactly_ where his sword was.

In the clearing.

With Damia.

Effectively, behind enemy lines.

_**Kuso!**_

"Just...gnn'a...nap..." He could barely hear the words she was saying, and they were starting to become slurred.

Sesshoumaru panicked. He _knew_ she was dieing, he knew it, and it scared him so very much. He, who was very good at causing injury, was not very well versed in how to deal with it. Human medicine...

It involved herbs. And bandages. Possibly, chanting. Beyond that, he didn't know much. Youkai healing was such that it generally didn't much matter. Kagome...

What could he do...? He could do anything, couldn't, couldn't, didn't know what to try...and every moment, he was painfully aware, was another precious second gone, anther grain of sand. To hold infinity in the palm of your hand...

He glanced at the crude half finished bandage on her forearm, and tugged at it, feeling totally helpless - how could he tie it on with one hand? Why wouldn't it stay on her arm? He tugged on it more, and then stopped. He was only making it worse.

Why did she have to smile so peacefully?

Impotently, he glared at the useless blade at his waist. He'd spent so_ long_ searching for the sword that could slay a hundred in one swing... !He couldn't save her, he couldn't, he only had a sword, a sword that could heal...a sword that would bring the dead to life. He couldn't let her die...

He'd give anything for Tenseiga right now.

Anything.

'_Tenseiga..._' Sesshoumaru watched Kagome, hand clenching and unclenching, eyes helplessly enraged There was no way he could leave her to return to the clearing – it was far behind them. He could not carry her, or she would die sooner, and he couldn't bear the thought of it. He could not return for the sword that conquered death.

Tenseiga only worked once. And it only worked on those whose souls were not already taken by deaths pallbearers.

If Kagome died, he had less than a few hours. And that would not be enough time for her.

Sesshoumaru ran this thought through his mind with shock. It didn't sink in. It just wasn't sinking in. She couldn't go anywhere. She couldn't die; that was impossible. She was...Kagome. What would he do without Kagome?

"Kagome...Kagome..."

"M'fine, j'us tired..."

Recklessly, Sesshoumaru pulled her into a careful hug. "Don't go to sleep just yet. Please." He didn't care that his voice was wavering at the last. All that mattered was not letting her go – he wouldn't.

He wasn't letting go...!

Sesshoumaru felt so helpless, then. He had never felt that way before in his life. There had always been something he could do to help. His own strength has seen him though many many battles.

The mask over his face slipped just a little bit, allowing some of what was running though his mind, though his stony heart, to surface. Sesshoumaru's eyes stretched back into eternity, empty.

And now, watching this ting human miko, so fragile, slowly slipping away... He had watched death come and go before. It had never mattered. Tenseiga...

He would have given anything for a way to get his hands on it!

All those years worrying over Tetsusaiga, plotting to get his hand on it, were wasted. When it came right down to it he was left with only Tetsusaiga, with just the sword he'd always wanted.._.and_ _it was the wrong sword. _

Kagome...He held on just a little tighter.

"Sessh...mru? Wha...?" She sounded so faint...clinically, his mind gave her another hour, tops. The rest of him was not happy with this pronouncement.

"Don't worry, Kagome."

Between the fur, and the fragile, bloody miko in his arms, he felt – and heard - something crinkle. Sesshoumaru frowned. Crinkle...?

"M'okay."

"No. No you're not. But you will be." He just didn't know how to do it. He didn't know how, didn't know what else to do except to hold her tight and pray she'd hold on just a little longer. All thoughts of defeating Damia were gone, by now. If she had appeared just then, Sesshoumaru would have hardy known what to do about her.

And then Sesshoumaru frowned and held Kagome out at arms length, face scanning hers, worry written larger than ever into his features. Her eyes were closing. Crinkling...

Sesshoumaru frowned, and then his eyes lit up briefly. Crinkles. Paper.

Writing.

When was the last time he'd seen writing Kagome had tucked away on her person? The night they'd had that fight in the ship cabin. When she had asked him what he was going to do.

Sesshoumaru realized he'd been acting a bit childish, but put it aside. There was no time for that now. Gingerly, he reached down towards Kagome's white, stained top. His fingers hesitated just before they came into contact, and a slight ting of pink crept across his nose. She'd kept the paper tucked into the fold of her white woven top, close to her chest. He hadn't even thought...

Ordinarily, this might be considered a little rude...But he had to find out what that paper was. If it was what he hoped...

There might be a way. There might be. He couldn't bear to see her die, to know that he'd led her to her death, had been unable to save her. But most importantly...he _would not_ see her die.

Sesshoumaru, feeling entirely too much like Miroku, reached for the sound of crackling paper, trying very hard not to imagine what this might look like from the outside.

"Tickles...Boyo...cat.."

He was oddly amused that Kagome had mistaken the fur wrapped around her, and his nervous fingers for her pet cat, and at the same time, deeply saddened that she had not even known who he was. Quickly, Sesshoumaru scanned the papers he had retrieved.

They were the right ones!

He glanced quickly at Kagome, and at the papers. It was all laid out in detail. How to do something that might save her, if he lent her his own strength, lent her his endurance, let himself help her.

"_I am right here. And I am sorry, Kagome. I truly am. I didn't want you to be caught in this."_

_He didn't want her to be thrust naked into the world of backstabbing, of power, of those who used and left you to dry in the sun. He wanted to protect her from himself. _

_Especially himself. _

_He could never tie her to himself as she had said, before, could never hold her to him with something so ugly as blood. Even something with good intentions...he would never do it. Winning would not come at the cost of her freedom; death would come before that unhappy hour. _

_Most especially from himself..._

_He watched as Kagome closed her eyes and then, let out a long breath, face suddenly. calm, as though she had reached a state where she could do nothing but accept, watch, and act when the time was ready. A place beyond emotions..._

"_Alright. I...understand. I don't __**like**__, but I understand. But remember – if you ever decide you want my help, in any way...even that way...I will do whatever it takes."_

_She smiled sadly, and turned, but before she left, looked back one last time. "I made a decision a long time ago, Sesshoumaru. I don't know if it's right, or wrong... but I'm sticking with it."_

_And then, she walked out the door. _

Sesshoumaru closed his eyes – he remembered that night in the cabin very well. And he remembered what Kagome had said. Perhaps...

He had to choose between pride, and life. Once, it would have been an easy decision: Pride.

Once, it would have been hard – Pride, or a life?

Now, it was easy once again.

Life.

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_...Tastes like cheddar. Yay for Pink Floyd! _

_...ahem. Yes, anther pop reference, though considerably more blatant than last one. Lol. I'll shut up now. Hopefully my slightly cheesy, angsty writing hasn't totally dropped off the face of the plausibility __chart by now._

_And I know the cliffies keep getting stuck in there too. Sorry! Its...the nature of the authoress to be slightly 'mean'? (shrugs)_

_Apologies as well for lateness. I wanted to get the above scene right. I probably didn't spend as much time as I ought to have, but I did sit on it a little longer to take time to edit. (has a new job – not much time for anything now...) Thank you for your patience with me, and for your many, many kind words, both on the last chapter and on this story. I have started the next chapter, and I hope to get it up as soon as I can._

_That said – reviews are always appreciated! (big grin)_


	37. ch36:No Need for

A small** note**: I believe I mentioned, in the prologue of this story, that I know the fluffy thing Sess drags around isn't a tail - my guess at the time was a boa – but that I would treat it as a tail for the duration of the story because it was funner. Mwahahaha...

(This has, by the way, **nothing** to do with the fact that it is more 'fun' to write being wrapped in a large furry tail than an enormous scarf...(innocent smilie))

**:: No need for... ::**

Sesshoumaru quickly scanned the page held firmly in his hand, partially shielding it from the beginning of the rain with his body. This seemed simple enough….a few words, and, of course, blood. (Why else would it be called a blood bond?) Somehow, he doubted that he'd have a problem getting Kagome's – his would be no problem either.

Mind made up, Sesshoumaru bent down to the ground, and peered worriedly at Kagome. "Please, Kagome. Do you remember that bond, the one you wanted me to agree with?"

"…Yes."

"Then…please let me try it. Tenseiga is gone. You…you're… And…I don't want to lose you."

"..Sure thing, Sesshoumaru." Kagome gave him a weak smile, and then her eyes began drooping closed again.

Sure, sure thing. They were going to do that blood thingy, and then kick Damia's ass…

Kagome moaned softly as a hand grabbed her own. It hurt..._why_ it hurt, she had no idea, but it was muffled – she could sleep it off...

"Kagome...Kagome!" Sesshoumaru...?...what did he want? She'd almost been asleep, and he kept waking her up...rude of him...she just wanted to sleep in a few more minutes – maybe the exam would vanish in the meantime. Souta had school too, he'd get her up...

"Wha..'sis?"

"Please, Kagome. Please listen to me." Someone was pleading with her to pay attention. Kagome didn't get it – math wasn't _that _important, was it?

Kagome wanted to ask him who he was, and what had he done with the real Sesshoumaru, but couldn't find the energy for it – she was too nice and sleepy to move. "Listening."

"I have a way to save you. But you have to listen. Please."

Maybe it was Inuyasha, not Sesshoumaru. What one earth would _he_ be saving her for, or asking permission about?

"...say this, come on, repeat it..."

..it was wet!

Kagome muttered something about giving him permission to do whatever little project he had in mind, and then tried to tune Inuyasha out. He could figure it out later...

"..and...this...this...exact phrase...when I say you should..." Sure, sure, whatever. She didn't know why Sesshoumaru was dictating her miko lessons now – maybe Kaede had gotten him to help with her learning so they could go get Damia. Why had she been thinking he was Inuyasha? No problem, she'd do it...Kagome just wished she wasn't so tired. She was sure she'd gone to bed early last night, too.

Sesshoumaru, with some difficulty, kept his breathing even and refrained from giving into temptation and just crying in frustration. Rain dotted his face, trickling down his cheeks – it wouldn't have mattered if he did or not. Rain, water, and the dark of night. It was hard to read the neat kanji on the page, even with his eyes.

Nature had a sadist's sense of humor.

She was making no sense! He couldn't do anything, not if she was like this...! He was so afraid, so scared he'd mess this up, that he'd lose her...

If he did...

Sesshoumaru knew he wouldn't care about anything after that. The fact she was gone, that Rin was gone, that Damia was still alive, would be the only realities left.

He'd destroy Damia, but it would be an empty victory. It wouldn't bring her back...either of them back...

He shook his head. Kagome wasn't dead yet, and it did him little good to reminisce over Rin.

He had to try to save her, somehow. What on earth they ended up doing to save her didn't matter, so long as she was alive at the end of it. If she messed up saying her own part, it was okay, just as long as...

Sesshoumaru didn't know how to do what Damia had done to Mesau, and possibly those two other girls. That, he knew, was a slave's bond, and did not need participation – just blood, and a way to mark the unlucky miko. He might have tried that just because it was more sure – he could not guarantee that Kagome would be able to fulfill her half of this. He wouldn't have kept something like that, of course; a slave bond, on _Kagome_? Ridiculous! He was enraged that Damia had even begun to think of it.

He was worried for Kagome, though. He was _sure_ he had caught something about Inuyasha, an alarm clock, and school in there somewhere…

He knew it was the only way to go, though. So he just had to hope, and pray for the best. Kagome...he knew he had to finish this soon, or it would be too much for even his added strength to save her...he just hoped it was not too late already...

He set the paper down, tucking it away in his own top this time. Sesshoumaru carefully curled his hand around Tetsusaiga, and deliberately pressed his hand into the blade. Blood welled up along the cut, and belatedly, he wished he had two hands. It would have made this easier by far... but no matter. There was no use wishing for things he did not have at this point. He had no Tenseiga, and no arm. Simple fact. Move on... Sesshoumaru closed his eyes, and drew his hand away from the sharp blade, red welling up along his palm. Blood to blood, strength to strength, and life to life.

_'Inochinotsuna wa inochinotsuna'_

And then Kagome smiled up at him, and said the same thing he had been thinking back to him.

"Inochinotsuna wa inochinotsuna"

And Sesshoumaru reached out his hand, and grasped for hers.

_'Blood to blood, strength to strength: life to life.'_

"Inochinotsuna wa inochinotsuna"

He held on tightly, fearfully; what if it was too late already? Her hand was so cold…He couldn't...

Sesshoumaru shivered, afraid for Kagome, and praying she would be alright, that she would be okay, that this was truly the way to save her...

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Sorai crept though the bushes on silent feet. Upwind, she could tell that Tosa's camp had been set up. Distantly, she could still hear arguing.

"No! That is not how you treat those clothes, Tosa. I spent far too long trying to get them fitted – I'm not going to go though that again." Sorai thought that was Satsuma, calm voice betraying only a minimal amount of irritation, and long-suffering.

"Agreed" Tosa began muttering, something about evil, official, and fittings. Sorai could barely make out what he was saying.

Sorai covered her hand with her mouth, to stop herself from smiling at the distant yelling, and glanced back at the miko on her back. The poor girl was exhausted, and had fallen asleep sometime in the flight. All the better for Sorai – she sympathized, but all those tears had been a bit much to deal with.

"Botan... Botan. Wake up. We're there." Sorai smiled as she said this. The whole trip here had been one long worry after another. Was Damia too close behind? Had she caught up to Sesshoumaru? Could Sorai get there in time…?

At least they were here - all that was past now. She still worried, but for now, she would focus on getting close to Tanuma and stating her case.

Botan stirred. "We're there? Where_ is_ there?" She looked confused, and whipped at her puffy eyes.

"The Southern encampment."

"Indeed."

Sorai raised an eyebrow and forced herself to refrain from jumping a foot in the air like Botan just had. Dratted Tanuma, surprising her like that…

Tanuma strode out of the shadows where he had been hiding, dropping the kitsune illusion of nothing there on the way. "I would have thought you, and Damia, would be hot on the trail to Aizu by now. What brings you here?"

It was not a question – it was a demand, and a challenge. Sorai really had no reason to be there, other than to spy, in his opinion. He was making that abundantly clear.

Sorai took a deep breath, and decided to gamble. "Sesshoumaru. That is why I am here."

Tanuma tensed ever so slightly – Sorai might have missed it had she not been looking for it. On her back, Botan slid off, and stood on her own on wobbly legs. It seemed that with distance, Damia could not control her quite as much, or draw as much power. Sorai was glad of that.

"Sesshoumaru?"

"Yes. Sesshoumaru. He's not as dead as I thought." Sorai laughed a little, saddened. "Damia must have done something underhanded to get the throne for sure, then. I rather thought she had, but…I had no proof."

She still don't know what had happened to Sesshoumaru after all this time. And he had had that woman with him...but that was not for her to say. She knew he would not have left the West to Damia over a woman. It wasn't for her to judge, and she trusted him enough to think there was more to it than met the eye. Sorai supported Sesshoumaru yet.

She looked at Tanuma, who was still on edge. He didn't know what side she was on, she realized. At least he was allowing her time to speak before acting. If he didn't like the answer….well, she'd end up running from both an angry Damia, and an angry kitsune. Not fun. And not going to help Sesshoumaru.

"I came back to camp, and Damia was trying to kill him. Sesshoumaru ran, with a badly injured woman. I distracted her long enough to let him escape, before leaving myself."

Botan wiped her eyes. "Kagome-sama. That's who he had with him. Damia never told me not to tell you about Kagome. Please save her!" She bowed very low to Tanuma, nearly overbalancing on her shaky legs.

Tanuma blinked. "Damia told you not to tell…?"

"Damia is entirely too fond of stealing power form others, in my opinion." Sorai answered his question. "Mesau, Botan here, and another are being used. Mesau might have agreed to it, but Momiji and Botan definitely did not. Will you help me, and Sesshoumaru?"

Tanuma closed his eyes briefly. "Sesshoumaru, and a human woman named Kagome, being attacked by Damia…this almost begs the question of whether all those rumors were true…" He was testing Sorai. Tanuma didn't want her appearance to be some part of a larger trap. Damia may well have sent her to find out what his position was, and what he knew about Sesshoumaru's reappearance. Best hide that knowledge till he could tell if Sorai was sincere. He thought she was, but….he would not underestimate her. Too many had done that and deeply regretted it. The smaller youkai named Sorai did not look dangerous – small, and delicate. Good enough with a blade, but not a star. But it would be folly to forget the mental dexterity that had given her her title...

Sorai drew a deep breath. "The girl, Kagome, is the Shikon miko. She bore no love for him last that I knew. Rather the opposite. I think they were _working_ together, not eloping, but I have no proof, and no idea why she was even there. Probably working against Damia, but I don't know for sure. There was no time for talk. Regardless, Sesshoumaru alive is worth much more to you and your masters than dead."

"True, true." Tanuma let out a smile. "That is enough questions for now. I believe you are sincere. Come with me."

Botan shivered as the latest youkai led them both towards an encampment – with more youkai in it. And all of them were powerful, as powerful as Damia…scary...

This was getting really scary, all these youkai. A miko was supposed to kill those youkai that harmed people, she knew. Not all were bad, she had learned, but some were. She did not know about these ones yet.

"Ah, Tanuma, just the man…who's that?" Tosa squinted at Sorai, before blinking. "Satsuma, we have a guest."

"Sorai tells me that Sesshoumaru has gotten into a bit of trouble, Tosa. Satsuma." Tanuma nodded at each of his leaders, and his face was grave. "Damia found him, and Kagome."

"What?! He was just going to get that silly sword, wasn't he? Ran off when my back was turned..." Tosa shook his head, before muttering "Silly man can't stay out of trouble worth shit._ And_ Kagome…as bad as he is!"

Behind him, Satsuma shook her head. Sesshoumaru…she was worried for him. She had been slightly annoyed when he had run off to get Tetsusaiga on his own, without an escort. And now...worry some.

Tosa started giving orders. "Get those tents down – leave everything that isn't important. We're going!"

Sorai watched, and then frowned. Tanuma…..he'd just been stringing her along; he'd known about Sesshoumaru all along.

So the Shikon miko _had_ been working with him. Fears of eloping with someone were somewhat salved. From the sounds of things, Sesshoumaru had taken Kagome with him and just gone on a quick errand for a sword…possibly Tetsusaiga…? When he was ambushed. He would not have been prepared, nor ready. Damia had picked her time of attack well.

"Wait a minute. You still don't know what her plan is." Sorai held up a finger. "I came because of that as well. Botan. Tell us what you were privy to."

"I…can't tell you." Botan frowned at Sorai, before her face brightened. "But I can tell _them!_"

She shrugged. "Damia told me not to tell you, and much as I don't like it…I can't get around that stupid bond. You can overhear by accident, though."

"She wants Kagome-sama. I don't know who Sesshoumaru is, but she wants to kill him too. She wants poor Kagome-sama, so she can do the same thing to her that she did to us…"

Botan held up her arm, slipping the sleeve back to show the jagged, new scar. "I hate her. She had no right to do that!" The look on her face was pure fury. "All I was doing was getting water for the night, and they grabbed me, and I wasn't quick enough to fight them off. My sister…Momiji came out running, after me. We were both caught, and held. Mesau helped Damia do that."

Tanuma winced slightly. "Kagome…heh. I doubt she'd be pleased with Damia... So Mesau helped her do that. You didn't join of your own will, like her?"

"No! Why would I do that? That's crazy!" Botan fumed at him. Who did he think she was, some sort of dark miko?

Satsuma sighed, and shook her head. "So what do you propose we do, then…Sorai?" She turned to the defecting spymisstress questioningly.

"I think we need to go after Sesshoumaru first, and be on the lookout for Damia. I can get you to where the fight was. At an old well, in a clearing close to a human village. I believe it's the one Kagome was known to frequent. We can pick up the rail there. Damia is probably already following him, or I."

"…I wonder where the Shikon went, if Damia was after the Shikon miko." Satsuma wondered. "Did she get that, I wonder?"

"Shikon…? No, she seemed angry that it wasn't there, actually. Thats one good thing." Botan frowned. "Are you going to help Kagome, or not?"

"Yes, we will, child, don't worry." Satsuma smiled at Botan. "Tosa. Stop sputtering like a chicken, and get moving."

Behind her, Tosa stopped fiddling with the tent, and then straightened up. He grabbed his favorite, worn belt, with katana attached to it, and grinned.

Hey, maybe he wouldn't have to wear dress clothes now…!

"Right. Okay, then. Tanuma, and you three – come with me. Satsuma, are you coming with us or staying?"

"Going, of course." Satsuma sent him an arch look, picking up a water bottle and a pack of food, tossing them to Sorai. "Apologies for his lack of hospitality. You can eat as we move, I hope?"

"Of course…" Sorai easily caught the skin of water and the package of travel food, splitting them with Botan.

Three of the guards came with them – Botan was allowed to perch on one of them, still nibbling on the food, so that Sorai, already tired, would be able to get there faster, leading the way.

Rather quickly, everyone was ready, and they left. The campsite was abandoned, except for the two guards left behind to pack up, and slowly begin moving all the extra baggage towards Aizu, on their own. The rest of the people who had set out after Sesshoumaru and Kagome would arrive in Aizu when they arrived.

11111111111111111111111

Damia swore as the cart caught on a branch behind her. Again. This was slow going….

But at least the trail was clear. She could smell the blood Kagome had left in her wake fairly easily, though the rain had dampened it a bit. Damia judged they were a good few hours behind the wounded miko, yet. Overhead, the sky grew darker, as the sun finally dipped below the horizon. The blood was about an hour old, maybe more. In this light, and this rain, the trail wasn't the easiest to follow.

At this rate, they would never catch up….but she couldn't really leave the two miko behind. Momiji, still not broken in yet, would probably do whatever she could to stick a spoke in the wheels, and Mesau was in no condition to stop her.

At least Mesau was able to move, now. Before she'd been reduced to a crawl. The shattered leg hadn't healed properly, but it would do for now.

Damia wondered how she was going to save the situation. Tosa might even be in Aizu by now, working everyone against her. Ezo was hers, in all but name – a puppet. But she still had a mind of her own, and if she regained control, it would be the West against three domains…

Her hopes for getting Choshu on her side were slight, now. He picked the winning side, and, as Damia was now painfully aware, she was not winning. Maybe there still was a way to fix it, maybe she could still arrive before Tosa, and try to turn the tides. It all depended on the situation, on what could be done.

She would just have to see what things were like when she got there, and fly by the seat of her pants.

Soon, she'd catch up to Sesshoumaru. And then, she'd finish him off. She wondered if Kagome was even still alive, but she couldn't be too far from dead, by now. It would just be him….Sesshoumaru, run to ground, and either a dead, or near dead, miko.

Grimly, Damia pressed on.

111111111111111111111

Sesshoumaru continued to hold onto Kagome's hand, the words fading from his lips. He waited, waited...was it working, was it doing anything? He felt no different... His palm stung, a bit, hand clasped tightly around Kagome's. Above him, the wind brushed though the trees, sending water tumbling down from the leaves. It was quite dark in the forest. Hours till dawn, and light...

And then... Rain fell on his face as a feeling of strangeness engulfed Sesshoumaru, took hold of him. His eyes widened slightly, and he hoped, hoped...

The bond had taken – he knew that much had to have happened, or this feeling of draining, of a connection, of closeness...that would not be growing, coming though his clasped hand without it.

Kagome...

He could feel the warmth spreading though him, radiating from his arm, where their two bloodied hands had mingled, the fingers tangled and entwined, trembling.

Sesshoumaru swallowed as a wave of fogginess, of white blur hit him – it had to be Kagome. He could_ feel_ her...the slightest presence barely intruding on the back of his skull. So much hurt...

There was no question; Sesshoumaru simply tried to will some of his own reserve of strength, his own ability of healing, back towards her. There was no thinking involved anymore; he just did, hoping, cradling the tiny form under the trees, away from the rain that fell on his face, away from the encroaching dark.

11111111111

Kagome's eyes went wide as the wave of warmth, and worry, worry for_ her_, hit her. And with it came strength, strange, overwhelming, almost, a feeling of protection, of being protected, or wanting to protect in turn.

The fog that had overtaken her mind was roughly shoved back, and she gasped as what was going on finally clued in, as clarity struck like lighting, immediately illuminating the stark scene.

Sesshoumaru...was trying to save her by finishing what Damia had started. A bond...

Kagome smiled, slowly. Maybe now they could win, and get this over with... It felt very strange. She'd suggested it, and he hadn't wanted to. And now, he was the one doing things...!

Everywhere still hurt, but...she did not feel quite as weak, as woozy, as she had been. Kagome turned to face Sesshoumaru, realizing at the same time that she was wrapped – quite comfortably – in his long, furry tail. She'd been thinking it was a sleeping bag up till now. She had been quite out of it, she realized...

"Sesshoumaru?"

"Kagome?" Sesshoumaru peered at her, face still worried looking. Kagome shook her head slightly – she had never seen him so openly concerned before. Worried over her...she wanted to tell him sorry, sorry for making him worry, for not being able to do what needed to be done, sorry for everything...

What was most disconcerting was the fact that all this had just...happened. She hadn't expected anything of the sort from Sesshoumaru, and it was a bit...troubling to realize, as her mind emerged from fog, that he hadn't asked – he'd just done it. Or...no...he had asked... She remembered, dimly, through the night, through the dark and her aching arm...

Her arm.

It felt...better. It wasn't the sharp pain of a new wound – it was the dull throb of healing. And she was certainly thinking far more clearly. Kagome peered into the gloom under the trees, peered at the white hair of the figure beside her. She felt...glad. Thankful. Happy to be alive.

Kagome smiled softly. She had said, not so long ago, but what felt like forever, that she had made a choice, once. A choice even further back in time. And right or wrong, she was sticking with it.

She didn't mind at all. This didn't feel wrong, something that had happened without her consent. It felt...right. She fit so comfortably into place, right beside him...

Kagome surreptitiously patted her fluffy 'pillow.'

It was still disconcerting to realize what was going on, what she could feel continuing to change. The world rushed at her, and she jerked her head as the wind rattled the trees, as it echoed strangely, oddly, loudly in her ears.

Was it a storm...?

"No, it isn't." Sesshoumaru glanced at her, puzzled, giving her hand a reassuring squeeze.

He could feel a tenuous connection, strengthening, and feel his own strength fade away, gone to help Kagome. It felt...very strange, as though his hand, still holding onto hers, was full of tiny scratching needlepoints.

"The wind is so loud..."

"No, not louder than normal." Sesshoumaru brought his face very close to hers, eyes still worried, though his face was slightly calmer. "Kagome...? How... Are you...feeling better?"

And Kagome smiled up at him, eyes crinkled. She could feel him, feel his worry, the concern, just brushing the corners of thought.

"Yes. Yes, I am." She smiled wider. "Sesshoumaru, I..."

Further conversation was cut off, due to the fact that Sesshoumaru leaned forwards, and held her tightly, pressing her face into his shoulder.

"I thought...I was going to lose you."

Kagome blinked. He had been so worried...she could tell, and she hated to cause him worry like that. She had been so distant, so surprised, that she had had no time to react to her close brush with death. Now, it hit home.

She felt a little shaky, now, realizing how lose a call that had been. Her mom...Souta, Grampa...what about them? About her family here? They would have been heartbroken, and no one at home, except Hojo, would have really understood what had happened...

Kagome slowly reached around Sesshoumaru with her good arm, and held on as tightly as her shaky muscles would let her. "No – you won't. You're stuck with me." She smiled into his shoulder, and mved away, just enough to let her eyes scan his face.

Sesshoumaru smiled slightly, and held on a little looser. "The idea is not entirely unpleasant."

Kagome mocked huffed at him, before smiling and letting go, her good hand trailing down to her arm, fingering the bandages there.

It still hurt. A lot. But it was not the same kind of raw openness that a fresh wound carried. It was the dull ache of healing...and it was getting better. Quickly, too. It was almost like...youkai healing. Kagome grinned slightly.

Not a bad idea...youkai healing was a very nice thing right now...

She could still feel the connection between them, feel that she was living on borrowed strength. But that was okay. It was freely given.

"Thank you, Sesshoumaru." Kagome whispered softly , knowing he'd hear. _'Thank you, so much, for giving me a chance, for...for everything...'_

There was no answers, but the soft, downy tail around her waist squeezed gently, and the relived smile never left his face. That was answer enough, from one who rarely allowed himself to smile.

Kagome could feel her eyes start to water, but her hand was busy, tying up the bandages. She blinked them away, angry – crying was silly, especially _now, _of all times. Clinically, she wondered; was this that post trauma stress thingy she'd heard about? Either way, it was silly, and annoying...she couldn't see...

Silly tears.

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Sesshoumaru swallowed as he smelled the tears, before he saw them He held on awkwardly – why was Kagome crying? He didn't like to see her upset...

A terrible fear set in. Had he...done something wrong by saving her this way?

"Kagome? Kagome? Don't cry...I thought..."

Kagome started laughing, a few hiccups thrown in for good measure. "I'm fine. Don't worry – I will be fine. I just...started crying. Silly reaction..."

Kagome held on tightly, and relaxed a bit, eyes staring up at the trees just barely visible though the dark above them, not caring that it was raining, that her miko's outfit was ruined with all the blood, not even thinking of Damia. All that really mattered was here, now - and whatever came, they'd deal with it.

Sesshoumaru relaxed, the faint, new, foreign-familiar sense of Kagome in his mind calm, content.

He breathed out, relived. She wasn't mad at him for doing this. She wasn't...

He could still see and feel, the damage she had taken, and the tiredness...but those would pass.

It finally occurred to him that he was tired as well – he had not been fresh to start with, and he could still feel his own strength flowing away, towards Kagome. He didn't really mind – he could spare it, and she needed it more than he did. Even with what he had done already, he doubted she could stand up on her own yet.

Distantly, he wondered how far behind them Damia was, but let it go for now – he couldn't move, or do much. There was no point worrying, only a need to watch.

With one ear open, Sesshoumaru stayed where he was, wrapped in warmth against the rain, and smiled in the dark. Beside him, Kagome lay with a tiny smile on her face.

The companionable silence of two who had no need for words enclosed them, for as long as the world would let them be.

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_The chapter you were waiting for...one with Fluff...O.o _

_Wow... there's actually __**fluff**__. (Hopefully its tasteful, and not overtly sickly-sweet or OOC.)_

_'inochinotsuna wa inochinotsuna' – hopefully this means something like '__thread of life __ to (other)thread of life ' Apologies if this is incorrect – the above was what I wanted to say. It's been a while since I took Japanese, and I never took it in depth. Maybe in a few years I'll pick it up again as an option at the university._

_Anyway…yeah. Less of a cliffie than before I hope? (grins) Ehe…and Kagome's near all better now! Yay! Ready to kick some ass, too, soon. (apologies for the 'slightly' warped sense of humor – I thought the threats-due-to-cliffie were kinda funny…if I've been through the gauntlet for not updating, then where does the next chapter come from? XD I wonder...)_

_Anyway. Yes. Thank you for the many, many kind reviews on the last chapter! I have never had so many people comment at once before – scary, but in a good way. I really appreciated them! (huge grin) I enjoy witting, but encouragement, or critical feedback, is hugely appreciated and motivational. Thanks!_

_Think I'm going to go back to matting all those pictures now...(has about 15 to do, I think...) maybe more...? I keep drawing more of them..._


	38. ch37:Damia

**:: Damia ::**

Damia stopped, eyes flitting around the dimly lit forest, balanced delicately on the balls of her feet. They must have gotten very close to Sesshoumaru by now...the blood smell, and the barest hint of the smell of death, were newer. Stronger. The rain hadn't had a chance to completely wash all trace of their passing away, though it had tried.

Distantly, a part of her mind was disappointed. The Shikon miko – the woman called Kagome-sama by Momiji and Botan – was most likely dead then. A pity. She was rumored to be a very strong miko, one Damia would have been well advised to take...

She let out a long slow breath, and glanced behind her, though the rain. Ah well. She still had Mesau, Momiji, and, when they finally rounded her up, Botan. Damia was going to have to come up with some sort of suitable punishment for Botan, after she had run off like that. Damn Sorai...

For now, though, those thoughts would be set aside. Damia concentrated on what was at hand, and delicately sniffed the air.

The blood, here, had to be less than an hour old. And something else – she could smell Sesshoumaru more strongly as well. She hadn't caught too much of his presence, not till now. A hint only – this was enough to tell her that he had been here very recently, and had stayed for some time. Stopping to lick his wounds, perhaps...?

Or, perhaps, was it to ease Kagome's passing...?

Damia smiled as she whispered instructions to Momiji and Mesau. Momiji was to stay in the cart, and Mesau would follow behind her.

Damia paused to orient herself, and then smiled as a hint of wind brought more information to her nose, despite the rain that was dampening everything. It was not a pleasant grin, not at all.

It wasn't just that Sesshoumaru had been here recently – he was _still_ here, or if not, she was only minutes behind. She was not sure where the woman was – the trail led here, but she could not smell a body, or even a wounded human. There was nothing but the trail, and a lingering trace indicating she had spent some time here. Perhaps she had been buried already, if Damia could not smell her.

Damia frowned. If she was dead, then Sesshoumaru might be a little difficult to handle. He had cared for her, before, and he certainly bore no love for Damia. Back to that worrisome thing known as 'cornered, and desperate'...

Well, again, no help for it. And she had enough, more than enough, strength for this. Within the hour, she'd be headed to Aizu again, Sesshoumaru safely dead. Cornered and dangerous or not, the fact remained that he was wounded, tired, and she was neither of those.

Maybe, if she was very, very lucky, she would still arrive before the Southerners did.

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Tosa huffed, racing to keep up with Sorai, and with Satsuma. His wife had always been the better runner, of the two of them... Behind him the guards kept pace, one with a human miko clinging tightly to his back. There was no way a human could have kept this pace, not the ground eating lope they were going at.

It was all so...so...stupid! It had been a simple errand; to go and get Tetsusaiga, so as to find some way to use it. He'd been a bit annoyed when Sesshoumaru and Kagome had snuck off together earlier, (and had even been busily composing jokes about the two of them sneaking off into the woods alone) but now, he was worried, and for once, deadly serious.

"How far ahead is it to this clearing?"

"We are almost there - Hopefully there is a trail leading from there to follow Sesshoumaru, or Damia." Sorai called back over her shoulder.

She did not know what she would find on her return to the clearing. Damia had not followed her, clearly, or they would have met her by now – likely she had followed Sesshoumaru.

So; they would return to this clearing, and follow behind Damia, and Sesshoumaru. Sorai hoped they could catch up in time. They could move faster than either party probably could, but that was little comfort. Too much could happen in the time they were gone.

Grimly, the party pressed on, and at long last, they reached the battleground outside the well.

Botan slid off the back of the guard, knees wobbly and shaking from the long journey on youkai-back. It was not, she thought with a grimace, the best way to travel. She kept trying to put distance between herself and the youkai, and when one was having a piggy back ride, it was both difficult and straining to do so.

Kagome had never had problems, though – maybe because she'd liked Inuyasha a lot.

Sorai paused, walking over to where she remembered Sesshoumaru had exited the clearing. Tanuma went with her, and Botan watched as the two of them put their heads together, muttering. She did not pay too much attention, instead choosing to stay a careful distance away from the dead body of Kyohei, left in the clearing still.

He had been straightened out, and his eyes pulled closed, but he had not been buried, not yet. It was too disturbing to look at him, even if Tanuma had had to go and see, confirming his death.

The ground was clear of the weapons Botan vaguely remembered being dropped, and the cart she had arrived in with her sister was gone. The way the two spies were acting, clearly there was traces of its passage away from the clearing to be found.

"Come! This way – we are only a few hours behind, and the cart should slow Damia. We might be able to catch up!"

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With one ear open, Sesshoumaru stayed where he was, wrapped in warmth against the rain, and smiled into the dark. Beside him, Kagome lay with a tiny smile on her face.

The companionable silence of two who had no need for words enclosed them, for as long as the world would let them be.

...But unfortunately, such moments do not often last; The rain increased, and they moved under the trees a bit more.

Kagome shivered slightly, and Sesshoumaru's tail gave her waist a small squeeze in return. The rain brought the world with it into the isolated world they had wandered into, and with the downpour, worries for when Damia would arrive. The world insisted on intruding.

Sesshoumaru lifted his head, and tried to see if he could tell where she would be coming from, but it was rather a lost cause. "Kagome...I do not know how far behind us Damia was, but there's no doubt she will be following. I did not get that far away from her. And...Between the speed, and the blood, there's a large trail to follow." He'd been going too fast to even bother covering his trail at all... there was no question; they must have been followed.

Kagome frowned, and burrowed just a little bit deeper into the fluffy tail, miffed. Her arm still ached, but it could, gingerly, she found, be moved. She slowly clenched and unclenched her fist, noting the fingers, and how they worked, eyes awake to the rapidly blooming bruises along her forearm, and a new, closed over but still oozy, wound along her arm.

Odd. She'd heard of green, and yellow, and purple, but pasty yellow white bruises were a new one...

Kagome tore her eyes away from the sickeningly fascinating arm, and grimaced. Morbid, a little? It was time to focus. The arm was improving; that was all she really needed to know right now, and where it was at at the moment. She didn't want to try her luck facing Damia again, not when she was weaker than before. "Are you okay to take her on?" She wished she could help, but realistically...

"I...think I could try. But we need to be rid of those two miko first. You'll...have to help me, the way you wanted to deal with them before." He didn't mind asking, not now. He was too relived to have Kagome back. Just so long as she remained safe while helping him, of course...

"Before, I planned on being sneaky, wearing..." Kagome dug around in her pockets before turning up the set of beads that she wanted "...this, so they wouldn't know I was there. Then hit them over the head with a brick." She grinned, ignoring the dull throb of injuries, and the cool rain. "I think it'll work, even if its a bit sneakier than you would do."

Slowly, Sesshoumaru nodded. The idea of Kagome being invisible, (and safely out of harms way,) rather appealed to him just then.

And he wasn't, he found, quite as concerned as he had once been about honor, and dignity. Damia had no use for anything but practicality. His pride had nearly killed Kagome, against an enemy like her. Subconsciously, the rain-wet fluffy tail tightened its hold, and Sesshoumaru scanned Kagome's face, making sure she hadn't left after all. Because he'd been so proud, he had almost lost her...

What was a blow to pride set against something like another persons life, after all? They were in this together now, for better or worse. He had never heard of a blood bond dissolving with anything short of death. All or naught.

"That would be a good idea. Please, however, stay out of the way – I won't be able to see you to avoid hitting you."

Kagome smiled. "I get it. I wonder, though...just a sec."

She slipped the necklace on, wondering if Sesshoumaru would still be able to feel her there. Obviously, he would know where she was – his tail was still holding onto her. But that sense she had now, of being connected...that bond...Kagome wondered what else it could do, if she could feel a connection like this, to him, if she could share her strength, if he could. Miko intuition told her that there was a great deal more than a mixing of power that had just occurred.

For one, it was odd that she could see so well, even though it was pretty dark. And she could have sworn...well, no matter. They could explore that later, when there was time, and, perhaps, a miko who knew enough not to have to fly by the seat of her pants...

Kagome shakily put out her good arm, and levered herself up. It was hard work, but she managed to get on her feet, and circled around Sesshoumaru on velvet feet.

"Nah nah. Can't see me..." Invisibly, Kagome stuck her tongue out, a silly grin on her tired face. _'Can't hear me...see me...'_

And Sesshoumaru grinned, looking right at where she was.

He could feel her in the back of his mind, the slightest little indication that she was in front of him, based off guesswork and intuition. He could also, from the slightly amused feel he was getting, guess that she was up to something..."I have no idea what you're doing – but I know you're up to something."

Kagome took the necklace off, a mock pout in place. "Good guess. What gave it away?"

Sesshoumaru frowned, slightly. "It's...hard to describe...a feeling. But I could almost tell where you might be, based on that." She had been nearly where he had thought she was – it was hard to guess exactly. But he knew he'd be able to tell how close, and in what direction, she was. He would know where she was, or at least enough to avoid hitting her with any attack while she crept around the clearing invisibly...

The thought was a comforting one. Sesshoumaru smiled slightly as Kagome wobbled over to where he was, steps steadying as she went, and sat down beside him, staring out into the night and the rain. She scooted just a bit closer to keep warm, and avoid the rain.

"That's good. I wonder if I could tell where you are..." Kagome smiled, and turned towards him, but before she was fully facing his way, Sesshoumaru stiffened ever so slightly, senses warning of danger.

There was more than rain out there...

Kagome stopped, feeling his mood, and guessing what was wrong immediately. "How far away is she?" She whispered, as low as she could.

"I think...close. It's hard to tell, but... close. I give it a few minutes, at best. I think Mesau is with her, and another, but I'm not sure." Sesshoumaru whispered back, eyes, ears, nerves straining towards the noise, and the faint scent on the wind, nearly washed out with the rain.

Beside him, Kagome nodded. "Then...I will drop out of sight. She probably thinks I'm dead. And I would be, if not for you." A bright smile filled Sesshoumaru's vision, and Kagome's hand tightened around the fluffy tail fur. "Let her think that. I'll go hit Mesau on the head with a rock, or something. Try my best. Kick her ass, got it?"

There was an answering, feral smile in return.

"With a, ah... 'steel toed black boot.'" To quote Kagome...

Kagome smiled widely at the unexpected words, and stood up, as gracefully as she could manage. Sesshoumaru continued to sit where he was, and watched as she faded from view, leaving only the rain behind. But he wasn't worried. He could see a few bits of rain that were acting strangely around the space she was in – not noticeable until you looked hard. And he could feel her, there, trying her best to support him even after all they had just come though...

The least he could do was support her in turn.

Slowly, Sesshoumaru stood up, and loosened Tetsusaiga in its sheath. He had not had Tenseiga when he had needed it most – hopefully, Tenseiga's sister blade would not fail him now that he needed _it._ Somehow, he doubted it. The sword pulsed gently in his hand, so differently than it had once. Before, it would have burned him unmercifully...

He wondered if the bond had anything to do with that, or simply because he was trying to help Kagome stay alive. Maybe both.

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Damia carefully motioned with a hand to stop Mesau and Momiji from moving further, leaving them behind, and advancing alone. The cart was far too bulky, and the passengers too blundering for stealth.

The rain had not let up at all, and she felt slightly drowned, and irritated with Sesshoumaru for forcing her to go trekking though the drizzling cold to find him.

She advanced into the clearing one foot at a time, eyes scanning the gloom. The thicker smell of human blood pointed towards a denser patch of trees, but Damia was not stupid enough to go wandering right up to the thicket, and see if Sesshoumaru was, in fact, there. She could tell he had been, very recently...but he was probably also aware that she was here, by now. No sense in taking chances and letting him ambush her...he might even be planning...

A slight flicker on the edge of her vision was all the warning she had, before Sesshoumaru blasted out of the trees, sword held low and menacing. Damia batted the length of steel away raggedly, dodging.

An ambush – not unexpected. But because it had been anticipated, the effectiveness had decreased. She had escaped impalement, and as she whirled to face Sesshoumaru, the calm arrogance of one sure of her own ability descended. She who brought anger to the battle usually did not leave alive...Damia knew that as well as Sesshoumaru.

A slow smile began. He wasn't nearly as fast as he would be at top form. Wounded, and with no miko in sight. Prey. If she was any judge, he would not be nearly as calm as she, might make a simple, stupid mistake. Cornered and desperate like he had to be made for strong fighters...but stupid as well.

Damia made a quick scan of her opponent. There was blood stained through Sesshoumaru's clothing, pink with rain. Most of it was not Sesshoumaru's – she could still smell that much, even through the drizzle. Most of it was Kagome's...and there was a rather large amount. The girl must be dead – nothing human could have survived that.

Deliberately, Damia drew upon both of her miko-batteries, hidden in the trees, and began the careful business of stalking, her own sword out, the edge of the blade, for now, wet with only rain.

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Kagome half dragged, half crawled forwards, leaning heavily on the trees and pausing every now and again, gasping. She hurt all over...but she had to keep going...

The bloody-minded persistence, and stubbornness she had learned over the years with Inuyasha, in their pursuit of the Shikon shards, came to her aid now, reinforced by the month of hard training Kaede had given her. If this had been the same Kagome who had first fallen through the well, she would have given up long ago. Not this time, though. There was no question of giving up, or of failure.

She had something to fight for, now. Even more than before...this was personal.

Kagome winced and looked up as Sesshoumaru finally closed with Damia, hearing the swords ring, and the sudden flare in adrenalin from him in the back of her mind. It still felt odd, new, to have a vague sense of _something_ _else_ there. Not alien, but...still odd. Different. She could feel, distantly, the calm, analytical frame of mind, pulled raggedly over the worry beneath. For not it was comforting, at least.

She could also tell this was a fight that would be decided very, very quickly. Already he was falling back. Unless she did something...

Grimly, Kagome picked up the pace from before, pushing as hard as she dared towards where she could just see a wooden construct looming out of the dank, dark forest.

She blinked as the inhabitants resolved out of the fog, materializing like ghosts. Momiji...so it had not been a dream after all. Though why on earth _she_ should be here, Kagome couldn't guess. Captured, perhaps?

On the way towards the cart, moving at a shuffling run, Kagome grabbed a small, fist shaped rock.

Inelegant solution though it was, a dash and a smash might just do it...

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Momiji glared impotently at Mesau, once again weaker than an invalid at deaths door. Damia's sense of triumph through the bond scared her stiff, and left her full of anger, anger she could do nothing with. Kagome was gone, she was captured, this unknown Sesshoumaru was going to die, and on top of it all, she was cold, hungry, and miserable. And it was all Damia and Mesau's fault...

Momiji stared at the miko next to her, glaring, hating her, feeling guilty for doing so – she was a miko, she should not hate...if she only dared to pick up the sword beside her, the one that did not give out such an evil aura...what had it been called? Tenseiga?

But she did not dare, and was not sure that the compulsions lid on her would even permit her to try.

So it was rather a shock to her when Mesau, who had a concentrating sort of look on her face, half bent over her shattered leg, half intense fixation with the battle, suddenly sprouted a very surprised look, and then slumped over midway through adjusting the new bandages.

"What...?"

There was a distant sense of a pat on the shoulder, a moment of utter surprise bouncing through the bond from Damia _'Good, serves her right...'_ and then a white **Crack!** and darkness.

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Damia jerked as Mesau's flow of energy abruptly snapped, and the speed she had been going at dropped imperceptibly. Seconds later, a second recoil of energy from Momiji made her attack falter for one, crucial instant.

Sesshoumaru did not waste such a gift – he lunged forwards, and caught Damia squarely on the side, sword grating upwards and catching on the elaborate armor, metal screaming against metal, against bone.

He cursed as Tetsusaiga stuck in the amour; a quick jerk did not dislodge it.

Damia screamed, and leaped aside, tearing the blade from of Sesshoumaru's weakened grasp. A glimpse of wild eyes was all he saw as Damia leapt towards the edge of the clearing.

She was not moving nearly as fast – and it was not all because of that wound, surely. Perhaps she had lost her extra firepower...? Unfortunately, not quite enough to kill her...yet. At least now, they were about on the level in ability, both slowed up by wounds, and fatigue. Perhaps, now, Damia was even more wore off than Sesshoumaru. Kagome's sense of triumph and relief, coupled with that, led him to suspect that Kagome had succeeded in taking away Damia's source of power. Served her right. Kagome had come through for him, just as she had promised.

This was a good thing – except that now Damia was heading towards Kagome once again, invisible or no.

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Kagome sighed in relief as the two women slumped, and made as if to to hit Mesau a few more times...too bad she'd had to hit Momiji too...until the howl from Damia made her jump, a bit, rock falling from her nervous hands.

Kagome hobbled away from the two miko, pausing only to collect the knife that Mesau had kept at her side. Damia was going to come hunting down her miko, surely...she wasn't too attached to them sentimentally, but practically? Very much so. From the sounds of things, the battle had just turned in Sesshoumaru's favor, too...

She recognized the pocketed knife as the one Damia had cut open her arm with, and the skin on her arm there throbbed in sympathy. Kagome touched the blade, cleaned since she'd last seen it, and grimaced. A debt needed repaying, there...

Damia came running, jerking the blade of Tetsusaiga from her side as she came, obviously desperate to get her powerful miko batteries up and running, needing a quick fix to the fiasco she'd gotten into.

Well, Kagome wasn't having any of that. Damia has started this whole mess – but it would be Sesshoumaru, and herself, that finished it, finished Damia off. Distantly, she could see Sesshoumaru, feel him running towards them both, but he wasn't quite fast enough. Damia would get here first.

Kagome fingered the knife she had taken, and smiled. Damia had no idea she was even here...and she did, as it were, have a knife to grind.

As the traitorous youkai came to a stop beside the two unconscious miko, Kagome made her move, stepping noiselessly to the side. Damia's face was hidden from her by rain, but that didn't matter.

She took a careful swipe at the older youkai, burying the knife in Damia's arm, letting her hands and the knife glow with half seen power, bright as a small sun, burning away muscle, singeing bone. She poured everything, every last drop of power into that purifying knife she had, and this time, Damia had no defenses.

What had, before, been shrugged away, was now caught full on. Damia didn't even know what had hit her.

The battered youkai screeched in pain, and lashed out with a cry, blindly catching Kagome with the backside of her hand, sending her flying, but not before Kagome had severely crippled her. All the while her eyes were widely searching for the miko, staggering, arm hanging uselessly at her side, blackened and twisted, still disbelieving. How could a terrifying attack come from nowhere – the miko was _dead,_ was she not?

Kagome, still winded and trembling from her brief, unexpected flight, winced but didn't do more at the sight of the deeply wounded youkai. Cautiously, she got to her feet, eyes open for any movement towards where she still lay half fallen, half upright, and scarcely able to move.

Sluggishly, Kagome's arm began to bleed – it had partially reopened simply from the force of the blood moving through her arm, and the movement of her hands – thankfully, she hadn't landed on it. Small miracles never ceased to amaze her. If she had landed on it, she might be in a lot of trouble at this point.

Actually, scratch that. She would be in trouble soon anyway. Damia had begun t move, blundering around, eyes darting. She was looking for her attacker...

_'Shit.'_ She might find Kagome anyway..._'Sesshoumaru, please hurry...'_

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Sesshoumaru raced after Damia, aching all over himself, muscles protesting the abuse to which they had already been subjugated, and tissues moaning at the though of what was to come. He would, he was sure, pay for this tomorrow...

Kagome – he felt the flare of power, felt her straining past her limit, felt the wave of purifying power spreading around her like a pool. It passed him over, untouched...but not so Damia. He heard her scream again at the completely unexpected attack and sped up.

He paused only long enough to snatch the bloodied Tetsusaiga from the ground, and then, as Damia recoiled from the invisible, and quite unexpected, miko attack, drew it back, blade glinting dully...

He wasn't fancy this time – Sesshoumaru was on Damia's back before she knew it, sword low, and held straight in a thrust. Short, and to the point.

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Damia could hardly think through the pain of her arm, the feeling thankfully lost from the numbed, burning ruin of a limb. Distantly, all thoughts of winning the four domains over at Aizu crumbled, and she felt herself sway. How...? How had purifying power like that...? Where had it come from...? She turned her head, looking feverishly for the source of this new threat.

The only explanation was Kagome – but Kagome was dead. No one could have survived that...what...was...

Damia was still stunned, sluggish. She didn't notice the rush of movement from behind until it was far, far too late to move away form it. There was barely time to think, to brace, to feel anything but pain, to concentrate...

Abruptly, the hit was blossoming from her chest, and Damia gaped at the blade that had suddenly emerged from her armor, looking down wonderingly. There was a sword. Right there. Sticking out of her. Very strange.

It didn't hurt – not yet.

Possibly, she thought, strangely calm, not ever. Shock, perhaps. It had also likely severed part of her spine. Or both. Youkai took a great deal of time to recover from wounds like that...she was going to need months of time, drawing steadily on her miko...by then, the nerves would be healed and the wounds long since gone, no pain at all..

A clawed hand grasped her neck before she could fall over, legs buckling beneath her, talons unsheathed and penetrating skin. With perfect clarity, Damia could feel the hot rivulets of blood seeping down her neck.

Oh. Sesshoumaru...

Her left arm, the burned one, would not move; the nerves had been burned clear away, and there was hardly enough left to move. The right raised itself feebly, sword slipping from nerveless fingers, clawing weakly at Sesshoumaru's wrist, at his hand, trembling from the effort of holding her up off the ground in a half choke.

Sesshoumaru stared at her for a few brief seconds, eyes unreadable.

Damia looked back, and saw death.

"Goodbye, Damia." No speeches; no threats, nor reproach.

Damia said nothing in return, did not even try to force something out of her strangled throat. She had lost it, lost everything – her miko, her credibility, a chance to swing the council, lost Japan, _everything_...

And as the hand tightened quickly, sending poison dripping through her limp body, past her mangled arm and gaping side, her last thought was that she'd lost her life as well...

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Kagome watched numbly as Sesshoumaru held Damia up, the other youkai weakly hanging there, unable to free herself. Damia suddenly appeared small for the first time, suspended from his hand. She could see him shaking with the effort of simply holding her there, and soundlessly pushed more of her own power towards him.

Brilliantly green poison dripped from Damia's neck, and she went as limp as a rag doll, collapsing once Sesshoumaru let go of her, eyes open and seeing nothing. Those eyes could not see anything, now.

Kagome let out a breath she did not realize she had been holding, and shakily, began to breath easier, still slightly jittery from the close brush with death, by the attack, pumped full of nervous adrenalin, frozen in the position of half getting to her feet.

Sesshoumaru stumbled after he had dropped Damia a few feet away, moving slightly further away. Kagome awkwardly moved towards him as he eased down to the ground, sitting and staring at the dead, pale youkai not too far away. It was done.

Fumbling with her necklace, Kagome ripped off the beads, trying to get to Sesshoumaru.

At last she reached him, and dragged herself over, bloodied arms and mud from the rain, hair dripping – she came up behind him and held on, resting her cheek against his back. Her arms did not quite reach around his wider frame, bu they didn't have to. She simply rested, both of them spent.

Sesshoumaru moved slightly and then stilled, and for a while, neither moved. There was no energy for it, for any of it. Kagome simply held onto him, the one warm point in this cold, dark night, warmth against the rain.

She shivered every now and again, and distantly, wondered of they had Nyquill in feudal Japan. Or the equivalent. Or something.

Although right now, she'd settle for a weeks worth of sleep and hot soup...or an eight shot venti extra hot no foam no whip mocha...

After a time, Sesshoumaru put his hand up, covering one of Kagome's tiny hands with his, still staring out over the dead youkai not too far away. His eyes weren't really seeing her, though. They were fixed on something farther away than that.

She was dead, now. Rin was avenged – even if she wouldn't, he admitted privately, have cared either way. It was really for his sake that he'd done this. It had not been revenue, not purely. It had been survival. All this time and effort, everything...it had all culminated in this.

Damia was dead.

And, strangely, he was alive. More importantly...

So was Kagome.

A small smile touched his lips as the black haired, rain-wet head shifted ever so slightly against his back. Kagome was alive, and if not well, then at least in one piece.

He could feel her shifting again – he had not worn armor for the trip through the well to retrieve Tetsusaiga – he had gone looking for a sword, not a fight. Rather an oversight – but it had worked out. And, now, it meant that he could easily feel the small amount of heat radiating from her, guarding his back against sudden chill.

Sesshoumaru slowly shook his head. So much had happened in the past few hours...it was hard to take it all in. He glanced upwards towards the clouds, and guessed that the moon would be setting soon. It was , soon, going to be false dawn. Only a few hours ago, he had been in the warm circle of light that was Kagome's family...never thinking he'd be attacked so soon, would have been wounded, would have saved Kagome, and she him...

But he was still in that light, he realized. Kagome was still here, and even if he was wet, if she was injured, if they both were ready to fall over from exhaustion...they'd brought that light with them, the warmth of 'not alone.'

Slowly, Sesshoumaru turned around to face Kagome. He glanced over the eyelashes, the hair matted with mud, the blood streaked on one cheek. Burnt youkai soot. Dirt. White from shock and cloudy moonlight.

Never more beautiful.

Slowly, Sesshoumaru moved his hand towards her face, letting his fingertips travel upwards, never quite touching, never quite there. Close enough to just feel.

Kagome watched, a small smile on her face. There was a faint air of puzzlement there, not sure what the enigma named Sesshoumaru was up to now.

The back of Sesshoumaru's hand, a few knuckles, gently brushed against her cheek, washing away the rain. He barely registered that he was sitting in mud – Kagome commanded his full attention.

Sesshoumaru wasn't sure what he was doing, now. His tail looped around to settle about Kagome again, and then, abruptly, he turned his face away, not wanting her to see his eyes, slightly ashamed and not knowing quite why.

He had no idea what he was doing, or why, anymore...! The tiny miko had turned him upside down. He just knew...he knew he wanted to reassure himself that she was fine, that she would be fine, that Kagome...

He wanted her to know that he cared.

But...Sesshoumaru blinked, nervous. If he kept this up, Kagome was going to look disgusted and walk away. She'd start thinking he was like that idiotic human monk, unable to keep his hands to himself...worst case, he'd get slapped. Or walloped. Or punched in the nose – he'd seen that happen once when Sango was **really** mad...

Kagome let out a low, throaty laugh, and then she pulled his face back towards hers, nose to nose, eyes smiling, lips curved up in a perfect, Mona Lisa smile.

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_Ack. Cough. Sweetness overload..._

_And yay! Ding dong, the youkai's dead! Lol. Theres still a few things to tidy up, and a vague epilogue, but I meant what I said when it was mentioned that this story was near done. (and it would be a shame not to finish, this close to...)_

_...I'm actually slightly scared (in a good way) by the amount of people reading this story, and commenting...more than I ever though would. (Especially considering how mean it was of me to not update for this amount of time...) One or two of you even sent me messages asking if I ever would update, too! Thank you so much for the reviews, and the support, despite my (lack of) updating habits! (huge grin) I cannot stress enough how happy that makes me._

_And – now, the excuses. Hahaha. Real life, basically. Had an art festival I was part of. Brought some prints from deviantArt with me to show/sell, but mostly other things, charcoal and ink and canvases I'd been working on since April, or before...got a few things on my webby to look at, if anyone's interested(Links in my profile - way for self plugging, here...XD lol.) I like writing, but art is...art. It took a lot of work to put that together, and unfortunately for this story, art had – still has - priority. It wasn't even like my job, where I show up, smile, get paid and go home and don't really care too much outside that – it was my pet project, and was babied profusely. Lol. So I hope you understand._

_Either way...as an apology, there's another chapter right on the heels of this one. Done, typed, uploading as you read, I hope...Sorry, everyone!! Hope you enjoy!! And, dare I say, review...?_


	39. ch38:Wellbeing

**:: Wellbeing ::**

_Last time_

_The back of Sesshoumaru's hand, a few knuckles, gently brushed against her cheek, washing away the rain. He barely registered that he was sitting in mud – Kagome commanded his full attention. _

_Sesshoumaru wasn't sure what he was doing, now. His tail looped around to settle about Kagome again, and then, abruptly, he turned his face away, not wanting her to see his eyes, slightly ashamed and not knowing quite why_

_He had no idea what he was doing, or why, anymore...! The tiny miko had turned him upside down. He just knew...he knew he wanted to reassure himself that she was fine, that she would be fine, that Kagome..._

_He wanted her to know that he cared._

_But...Sesshoumaru blinked, nervous. If he kept this up, Kagome was going to look disgusted and walk away. She'd start thinking he was like that idiotic human monk, unable to keep his hands to himself...worst case, he'd get slapped. Or walloped. Or punched in the nose – he'd seen that happen once when Sango was __**really**__ mad..._

_Kagome let out a low, throaty laugh, and then she pulled his face back towards hers, nose to nose, eyes smiling, lips curved up in a perfect, Mona Lisa smile. _

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Tosa admitted, privately at least, that his nose was not as good as his wife's, or as good as Sorai's. Dragons were much better at things other than scents. Aura's, for one. And he could see much better, and further, than a dog youkai – even if he could barely tell what the kitchens were cooking from three hallways over (sometimes, he wished that he had that ability – it would have made weekly forays into the castle kitchens around midnight that much easier...)

So when Satsuma and Sorai looked back, and told him in troubled voices that the trail they were following now was not so much signs of Damia's cart passing, but the scent of Kagome's blood, hours cold and rain dampened, he was surprised, and troubled. He knew what that meant – Kagome was likely dead.

Damn. He had rather liked her, too. She'd have done Sesshoumaru some good, probably – and if she was dead, then...well...even bet as to whether Sesshoumaru was, too...

Tosa felt his guts clenching, burning. They had been doing so ever since Sorai had arrived, bearing ill news. Not that he blamed her, really, but...he'd been much happier beforehand.

"There is a great deal of blood still on the wind, even with the rain." Satsuma bent down, touching the soil briefly as they stopped to check signs. "The wound, or wounds she had were dripping rather freely, from the looks of things. Here..."

Tosa closed his eyes briefly. Kyohei, at least, was gone, out of the way. There would be no more silver tongued ambassador for Damia to send to the North, or East. That was something...small consolation, but _something_, at least, to salvage from this mess.

But Damia...if she had managed to finish Sesshoumaru off and then raced to get to Aizu, there was very little he could do to make a case, whether Kyohei's sliver tongue was there to aid her or not. They would have lost a great deal of credibility...

Tosa felt old, then, old and tired, eyes weighed shut, and every limb tied with lead. The world would be a much duller place without his longtime friend, and the brief, bright human woman he'd brought with him. He was beginning to think that the only thing they would find at the end of this trail was a body...if that...

He said nothing, and he did not share his thoughts with Satsuma or Tanuma, but he could tell they had already considered the same thing. Sorai looked worried as well, though he did not know her as well to read.

"Another hour, perhaps." The small western spy announced in a soft voice, and with that, they were off again.

Tosa closed his eyes briefly, and followed, ducking through wet branches and the few scraps of undergrowth in the forest, aware that the sun was beginning to light the forest the smallest amount. False dawn...false hope, maybe...

If he arrived after Damia had been in Aizu for even a day, spreading rumors (Truth, for the most part, and easily proved...worse for them...) of him harboring the traitor and Sesshoumaru's human woman along with him, then there was little chance Tosa and Satsuma would win anything. Damia had a strong position already. Ezo wanted to help, but remained firmly under Damia's thumb...Choshu would never back him after this came out, surely. Three against one...

Tosa almost wondered, briefly, if it was worth fighting over, too numbed to care. Youkai couldn't afford another battle, a war, like the last civil uprising had been. With the emperor dead, there had been fighting for centuries as the great families fought first for the vacant throne in Aizu, and then, for land and survival...numbers had dropped dramatically, while the humans only grew, slowly, slowly, tipping the scale...

Maybe they could work out some sort of 'this is my side of Japan, this is yours, we'll agree to disagree...'

Tosa shook his head, more tired than ever. As if _that_ would work...

A problem he had long considered, and hadn't yet managed to solve. Tosa felt like beating his hands against the wall, but then stopped. Nothing would be accomplished...circular thoughts ran through his head as the party from the south, led by Sorai, continued onwards.

Consequently, no one was really in the best of moods when they topped the forest rise, and Sorai motioned them to stop, eyes scanning. Everyone was on edge, worried, and strained after so long searching with no reassurance of finding their friends alive.

Tanuma looked back at his lord and lady, nodding to Sorai. "We're close. Very close. Wait here."

He made a gesture at Sorai, and then both youkai melted into the pale light of morning, circling round the nearby clearing like scouts.

Tosa, Satsuma and the guards drew closer together, Botan sleeping fitfully on one of their backs. The night had been very long and tiring so far for her – hers was the sleep of the utterly exhausted.

The others decided that they would rest for the moment as well – they could do nothing until the scouts came back in. Nothing to do but pace, or to sit and wait, and hope for something.

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Sorai ducked around the trees, nose to the wind. She was upwind of the clearing ahead, here, and could not sense quite as much as she wished. Tanuma and she had silently agreed to circle around the clearing, one from each direction, then head back to the main group and report. They did not know how close to Damia they were; if she was still close by, had moved on, or not. They knew nothing of what else might lie ahead either.

Sorai kept her eyes peeled, and her profile low. There didn't seem to be much movement here. It _was_ possible that Damia had moved on...but that would probably mean Sesshoumaru was dead.

She refused to believe Sesshoumaru was gone so easily though. She had been wrong before – this time a body would be needed as proof before she would reluctantly be forced to agree. She dreaded meeting Damia again – Damia had been itching for a good excuse to kill her, and her defection had been more than enough cause. Sorai had shown her true colours, and she couldn't go back from that. She didn't really regret it enough to_ want_ to take her defection from Damia back, but it might make life more interesting...

Sorai gave a silent snort. Maybe Tanuma and the south would accept her aid if Sesshoumaru was dead, and an angry Damia in charge of her adopted home. She hoped it would not come to that though. Sesshoumaru was, hopefully, alive and well, and Damia soon to be toppled...

Sorai closed her eyes. And maybe fish would grow wings.

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Sesshoumaru's gaze fell across the cart, a vague shadow in the wee hours of the mourning – he had not ventured near it yet. Mesau and another miko, called Momiji, according to Kagome's fuzzy explanation, were probably still laid out cold there. Tenseiga and Toukijin were also in the cart. Sooner or later they'd have to do something with them, and the body, but right now, he could hardly stand up, let alone 'deal with' anything unless forced to...

Kagome had long since fallen asleep on him – they had moved, at some point (he couldn't remember when, exactly – things were starting to grow a little fuzzy round the edges) to sit beneath the tree they had first sheltered under. The scent of Kagome's blood was still there, and he did not like it, but it was the closest to protection from the elements that they had.

Sesshoumaru was well aware by now of how frail humans were. A night of exposure to mud and rain could easily sicken the weakened girl, and that was the last thing he wanted at the moment. Besides – he didn't care much for the scent of blood, least of all Kagome's, but he drew comfort from the fact that it was old, and she was, for now, safe.

He watched as Kagome slept, wrapped securely in yards of fluffy tail. He had tried to smooth the worst of the mud away from it, and dry the fur as best he could, but there was a limit to what he could do...

At least she was warm, and as dry as possible – he had also made some effort to get himself dry as well, with a limited amount of success. At least he was more durable than she was, thankfully...

Sesshoumaru vaguely thought, as he began to drift off, that when they woke up he should probably try to find Tosa...must be worried...probably...

At the pleasant early hour of dawn, Sesshoumaru nodded off to sleep as well, curled around the tiny girl buried in fur. The morning sun fell across the two worn faces, streaked with mud and blood, utterly spent.

They stayed like that for a few hours, undisturbed. Sesshoumaru, usually such a light sleeper, was nearly as dead to the world as Kagome was. Somewhere in the back of his mind before he had fallen into the realm of Morpheus, he had been vaguely concerned, before trusting to chance. There was little to be done about it anyway...

So it was understandable that, when Sesshoumaru was nudged with an elegant, slightly muddy toe, he did not at first notice it, simply turned over, clasping Kagome towards him more firmly with tail and hand, muttering low in his throat.

The toe intruded again, slightly more insistently this time.

Sesshoumaru growled low in his throat, sounds nearly inaudible, barely awake enough to notice that someone was standing across from him. Or a pair of feet, at any rate...

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Sorai's nose twitched as she moved as quietly as she could, trying to avoid alerting anyone in the clearing to her presence. The rain would help her, though it was also a hindrance – she could see no tracks. Either there were none, or they had been covered and washed away with the rain.

Sorai moved in closer, keeping an eye on the wide trail of broken branches the cart had left. And, up ahead...

Scent. Kagome and Sesshoumaru, Damia and Mesau. Blood had been shed on both sides, here, in rather a large amount. She could not tell more than that – the trail had been dulled by rain, and muddied. She would have to look and see for herself. Sorai paused, and caught a glimpse of the back end of the cart.

She thought it was Momiji she could just barely see – she did not see Damia, or Mesau. Whether that was because neither was around or not, she didn't know. Cautiously, Sorai moved forwards.

The cart was there, definitely. In it, Momiji was slumped, lying prone on her back. Someone had obviously gotten a good shot at the back of her head – it was swollen to interesting colours, and a thin trail of dried blood ran from a shallow scalp wound. Mesau was not in the cart...she had fallen off the back end, and also sported a large, bloodied bruise to the head.

Most importantly, however, Sorai looked beyond the cart, and saw...a rather bloody, mangled, dead looking Damia.

Damia...dead?

Sorai stared, nose finally, this close, picking up on the scent of death. She did not see Sesshoumaru or Kagome, but what lay before her...Sorai moved closer, still cautious. It might be a trap - someone waiting for her to be drawn out, then close the jaws tight. Sorai had done similar things before, herself. It might not be Damia out there - just bait. The situation appeared obvious, but until she knew for sure...

Still, this warranted a closer look. It was a _very_ convincing illusion...one she very badly wanted to believe. But if it was real, then where were Sesshoumaru and that miko, Kagome?

Nothing ventured, nothing gained. Sorai was cautious by nature, but there were times when you needed to just leave that behind. Tanuma was close by – if she got in over her head, he would either fetch Tosa and Satsuma, or lend a hand if she had bitten off more than she could chew.

Moving forwards much more quickly, Sorai headed first for the vehicle, to check on the swords that were there – it looked like Tenseiga and Toukijin – and the unconscious pair of miko. She quickly scanned the interior, confirming that it was indeed Sesshoumaru's swords, and then checked the women.

Mesau's temple was bruised, but she seemed to be breathing fine, and showed no sign of real harm. Yet. She would probably wake up soon, and would be dealt with then. Sorai was not exactly kindly disposed towards her, and guessed there would be others who shared her views. Momiji was slightly better off, but would recover soon. Sorai felt slightly bad for Momiji, but cared not a whit that Mesau had been hurt. Botan would be relived to know of her sisters safety. Sorai nodded, and then made for the body, a few meters away.

This close to, it stunk – a disturbing mixture of floral, poisonous perfume (Sesshoumaru?) and burnt, purified youkai, laid over top of the scent of blood, and death. She could barely smell the normal scent of Damia beneath it all.

She moved towards the slight sound of buzzing, and waved away the few curious flies that had intruded. Sorai gave Damia a quick, thorough inspection, reaching out and checking, reading. Crushed neck, and claw marks – that had probably been what had, in the end, killed her. No illusion at all. She looked back at the unconscious Mesau, curious, and then her eyes widened.

Kagome and Sesshoumaru!

Beyond Mesau, hidden deep in shadow, was Sesshoumaru, and a small glimpse of Kagome, both sleeping. Or unconscious. She had missed them – the whole clearing was covered in their scents, and told a story of battle, of blood. They would have been impossible to pick out by scent, only by eye.

They were here! Safe...? Sorai hoped, prayed that they were both alive. She hurried to finish her grisly inspection of Damia, and turned swiftly towards the trees. Sesshoumaru...! She had to make sure he was alright, that in dealing with Damia, he hadn't died...

Damia! Sorai felt like laughing aloud in relief. Damia was gone!

It hadn't really sunk in yet. But when it did...!

Suddenly, the world looked brighter, more hopeful.

Sorai knew exactly what the situation in Japan was – she had thought, once, that Sesshoumaru's decision to sit on the fence was the right one. Now, she wasn't sure what to do, but she had known that Damia's solution would not work. Perhaps Tosa and Satsuma, or even Sesshoumaru, would have a better idea...

Of course, this all depended on what condition Sesshoumaru was in. Sorai stopped about a foot away from the former western lord, and narrowed her eyes. Good. Both the woman heavily wrapped in dirty tail, and Sesshoumaru, were breathing evenly.

This was always a good thing.

They appeared to be asleep, both of them. Sorai wondered at Sesshoumaru, allowing the use of his tail as both blanket and pillow, and then shook her head. He'd changed more than she'd thought – that, or was exceptionally tired...

She didn't blame them for sleeping – she could use with a good rest herself – but they needed to be awake.

Cautiously (wary of a half awake, angry Sesshoumaru lashing out) Sorai half nudged, half kicked at him, stood back, and waited for a reaction.

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Kagome opened her eyes as the blanket she was occupying twitched in annoyance.

Her first thought was, why was the blanket twitching?

The second was more along the lines of _'Shit – this hurts like a bitch...'_

Everywhere was stiff, cold, sore, and hungry. And, she realized, as she woke up enough to remember _why_ she was in this position in the first place, she was not the only one. The feeling of Sesshoumaru in the back of her skull was distinctly hungry and feeling ...miffed?

The reason for this was obvious, and standing not too far away. A short, female youkai was talking with him. Sesshoumaru was being polite, and to look, you would never know, but Kagome could tell that he was feeling like nothing more than another long nap, and food rather than talk just then.

"...so I sent Tanuma back for them, and he should be here soon."

"Mn?" Kagome squirmed her way upright, wrinkling her nose slightly at the faint scent of wet dog. "Whosits?"

"I see you are awake." Sesshoumaru's voice told her he had known the instant she woke up, and that he hadn't intended to do so.

"Yeah..." Kagome blinked rapidly. "And...may I ask who you are, and what is happening?"

"Kagome, meet Sorai. She was, before all this unpleasantness, my head of Western intelligence."

"West? Intelligent?" Kagome quipped, before apologizing. "Sorry – a very bad joke..."

"If you look at recent management, I would be inclined to agree." Sorai smiled. "Kagome, was it not? I believe I have you to thank as well for fixing those same management problems..."

"...it was mostly Sesshoumaru – I just bashed those two with a rock."

"Nonsense." Sesshoumaru gave her a small smile. "You undervalue your contribution. _I_ certainly did not purify Damia..."

Sorai said nothing for a second, watching the two of them. They obviously knew each other fairly well, which was a surprise. So this was the famous – or infamous, depending on who you asked – Shikon miko? The last she had heard of the miko, she and Sesshoumaru had been at odds at worst, respectful distance at best, because of her association with Inuyasha. She wondered how, and why, things had changed.

She would not have guessed to look at Kagome, but having been told, Sorai could believe this woman to be a powerful miko, current tail-wrapped appearance notwithstanding. Her clothing, while not in the traditional colours, was of the priestess style and cut, her hair drawn up as a miko's would have been. She did not see a bow and quiver in evidence – though come to think of it, there had been one at Tosa's camp. But those eyes...warm, laughing, inviting, but deep within, harder than steel.

There were a great many questions Sorai had for Kagome – not the least of why she was still alive. Damia had nearly killed her, and it was obvious from the amount of blood spread all over that nothing short of a youkai's healing would have saved her, or the gods own luck. But that could wait, for now. Tanuma would be on his way soon. Then the questions could start. For now, they, and she, deserved a short break, in Sorai's opinion.

As soon as Sesshoumaru had woken up properly, she had called for him – and then sent him back to get Tosa and Satsuma. For some reason, the notion of Tanuma as her errand boy amused her.

Sesshoumaru watched as Sorai sat down close to him, and delicately began to pull himself together. Tosa, he felt, did not need to be given more fuel for the fire...

Sesshoumaru was laying even bets that the first words out of the Southern lords mouth were not going to be concern over his health, but more along the lines of "So what's this I hear about you spending the night out with a pretty lady, hmn...?"

Kagome seemed to have picked up on his desire to at least have both feet firmly on the ground and presentable before the rest of the party arrived. In fact, she was doing the same thing, in between yawing and rubbing at her eyes to try and get the sleep out of them.

Sorai pretended to ignore all this – Sesshoumaru trusted her to remain silent. After all, if she had remained loyal enough to him to try and help, despite Damia...well. He had always thought she was reliable.

Maybe, he mused, if he, as Patrician, was 're-elected' to the position of Western lord by the longstanding tradition of one youkai, one vote (him being the youkai) then she might just be due a raise...

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Tanuma headed back towards the camp swiftly, already planning ahead, relived to finally have a course of action he could follow. He had to make decisions – better a bad choice than not to make one at all, in the business he was in, sometimes. Of late, it had been harder and harder to pick the lesser evil. Now, he could once again choose more easily.

Oh, not so easy as all that. But with Damia quite thoroughly gone, he could begin to take stock of the situation and plan. It would probably take them the rest of today to arrive in Aizu. Tonight, early if lucky, past sunset if not, they would arrive in Aizu. Then he could truly start getting to work. Tanuma spared no time in charging headfirst into the new angle of approach to their problem.

Ezo might be able to come round, with Damia gone. The Purist movement would have lost its main movers and shakers, with Kyohei dead as well. Two birds with one stone, that. He'd have to deal with Mesau, obviously – keep her around to question. It rather looked like she wouldn't be going far, not with those shattered legs...

He would have to find out, or confirm what various pots Damia had had her fingers in, and deal with those – if they moved quickly, perhaps the South, backed by Sesshoumaru, could quickly pull the power-base out from under the rest of them, much like Damia had been plotting.

Tanuma wasn't exactly sure what final curse they would follow. It would not be Purist, of that, he was certain. Unlike some, he kept a more careful watch on the human information network as well as youkai. He knew that simply trying to get rid of the human problem would, at best, be a temporary solution – and it would probably backfire soon enough. Humans tended to resent youkai as a rule. It worked if they kept to themselves- but when youkai made problems, eventually, the exterminators were called.

Not that exterminators, or slayers, would have much effect on those of his power. But given time and numbers...same old problem.

There was simply nowhere left to run to...Sorai, he knew, had come from the continent, running, like so many others. Humans had mapped the known world – it was a common boast of the pale skinned West, having filled in the edges of the map. Japan was one of the last free places, really, and now...

'Here be dragons' had turned into 'Here be port, food, lodging, and directions to the brothel.'

Europe had long since been left for the humans, as far as he knew. Distantly, as he sped along the path, Tanuma wondered when his team would get back from the trip. They had left months ago, to see if they could find their northern European counterparts...what had the Western humans called their youkai? Elves? Pixies, possibly? He wasn't sure. Tanuma was feeling the long day and night as well as everyone else, and couldn't recall exactly.

For, now, though...back to the more immediate problem of getting to Aizu, and getting the various members of their ragtag little group travel ready and on the mend. Only a little farther to go – Tosa and Satsuma ought to be within sight soon. They would be pleased to find all heir hopes realized...

Tanuma's face broke into a rare smile, the whip thin, usually taciturn youkai feeling that it was a special occasion. When Sorai had shouted for him to come quickly, back there, while they were scouting...he had feared the worst. He'd come tearing out of the bushes, sword loosened and ready to be drawn in less than a heartbeat.

It really hadn't been fair for her to do that – the smile had been just a little too bland. At least he had caught onto the situation fast enough – it had been fairly obvious in the early morning light what had happened. Sesshoumaru and Kagome were alive and well...

Tanuma continued to smile as he drew into camp; his arrival created an instant reaction.

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Kagome tried very, very hard not to wince as Tosa came tearing into the clearing, eyes wild.

"Sesshoumaru! Oh..." Tosa caught sight of Sesshoumaru and Kagome, and what was left of Damia, at the same time.

Behind him, Tanuma tactfully began giving the order to the guards that, as soon as Tosa had confirmed Damia's death for himself, they should deal with that little issue. And then someone should be sent to lay Kyohei to rest, as well.

Tanuma had, evidently, decided that the cart could be used for some of the traveling – Sesshoumaru hadn't looked like he'd be going far, and neither had Kagome. He and Satsuma stayed close to there, hovering over the two still unconscious miko, and setting about the task of getting ready to leave. Botan, as soon as she was awake as well, had rushed over to her sister, and was trying to wake her. The lot of them, Kagome decided sourly, looked like they were also watching Tosa, to see what he'd do...

In another era, she'd have sworn they had brought popcorn. She almost imagined the smell of cheese.

"Was I interrupting something?" Tosa winked at Sesshoumaru deliberately. Kagome groaned. This, on top of everything else, was just too much. It was_ far_ too early in the morning to deal with Tosa's twisted sense of his own entertainment value...

"Not at all. We do this every day, you know – stay up late fighting youkai and getting rained on. All that." Kagome replied sourly, eliciting a tiny smile from Sesshoumaru, and a huff from Tosa.

"See if _I_ ask after your wellbeing again anytime soon..."

"Tosa?"

"What?"

"You _weren't_ asking after my wellbeing!"

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_Yeah...slightly silly in places. But after the more serious chapters, I felt like it. (It's scary. Tosa begins to remind me of someone – a few someones - I know...)_

_I know its shorter. But it is, still, a second chapter in as many minutes, so hopefully I'll be forgiven._

_So...Here's the deal for the few chapters there are left – they'll be up, I hope, soon. I want to see if I can get this monster of a story done before fall classes kick in. I have a week of vacation that I'm taking the laptop with me on pretty soon. No Internet, for much of it except __**maybe**__ hotels? But time to type, I hope. Want to finish up over that week._

_Thank you for being patient, and for the many reviews! I know I didn't respond to some, but I did try to get back to most of them. They were, and are, greatly appreciated! (grins – anyone willing to leave me another one...or two...? Ehehe...)_


	40. ch39:Beginnings

**:: Beginnings ::**

Kagome slept fitfully, the impression of warmth in the back of her mind radiating a small amount of anxiety...but mostly just relief. It was a constant presence there, stronger than before, but it didn't bother her, really. Having that warm reminder both in her feelings, and in the soft weight of fur over her shoulder, was comforting. Sesshoumaru wasn't about to let anything happen to her – even if all she really wanted from him at the moment was uninterrupted rest. He'd guard her dreams for her...

The cart was not the most comfortable thing to attempt to sleep on. Kagome had already compared it to trying to sleep on a train at the turn of the century, noises and bouncing and creaking, swaying cars all night long. Somehow, though, she'd managed to drop into a fitful dose.

Probably because, even though the cart was horrid to sleep on, she was dead tired. Since this morning they had been moving, trying to push towards Aizu, the lot of them. Sesshoumaru and Sorai, Tosa and the two miko, Momiji and Botan (both currently relishing their regained freedom...) Tanuma, prodding along a captured Mesau, Satsuma, eyes taking everything in and not saying anything, and the guards.

It was hard, so very hard to believe that at this time yesterday, she had been thinking of upcoming dinner with her family...

And then they had come back, been attacked; somehow, miraculously, both of them had survived the night (barely) and killed Damia, all within a few short hours. It still left her reeling to consider how close to death she had come herself, and how she had been saved. Tentatively, Kagome reached out a half awake mental finger, and gently touched the back of her mind. She could tell Sesshoumaru was tired as well, but he was recovering.

She could also feel herself recovering through him – shared youkai healing. He wasn't cramming power down her throat anymore, not like last night, but she could feel a slow, steady flow of spiritual energy, twined together, passing back and forth between them like a hand hovering just above the skin, not quite touching. It was giving her a slight brain itch, to be honest, but she was far too comfortably sleepy to bother about it. Just so long as both of them were getting better, and were okay.

Fuzzily, Kagome reached out a hand to Sesshoumaru and smiled as she felt him cover her hand in return. Tosa had, after an hours worth of prodding, been told the events of the night previous. Surprisingly, he hadn't commented on them – yet. He had been serious for once.

Kagome thought ahead to the new plan they had roughly hammered out between them, aware that, for the moment, they were still scraping the pieces together off the wall. Sesshoumaru and Tosa had wanted to continue to Aizu city. They were both hoping to reinstall Sesshoumaru as the western lord (probably easy enough to do, according to Satsuma, at least...) and then to both make a case against the Purists. If they moved fast enough, those who had supported Damia might just get the political rug yanked out from under them.

Of course...the idea of either just killing all the Westerners, or more humans, as a problem solving solution, didn't have a replacement. They might be able to get rid of the purists, but the issue was still there; what on earth to do to cope with the encroaching western world?

It was here, Kagome felt, that _she_ especially had some sort of answer to offer them. She knew what was to come, didn't she? The 'future'? She knew youkai couldn't win through war, and she had said so before, told them they (or at least, Sesshoumaru) wouldn't be able to follow certain courses of action. She still hadn't worked out what to do to help, though. She had a feeling...a feeling that somewhere, there was a perfect solution, if only she – or Sesshoumaru – could think of it.

They were both from the future in a way, correct? Both of them should have an insight into the problem which none of the lords of this time did. She was on the right track, she could feel it, but...

Kagome was aware that, since she was currently half asleep – to be perfectly honest, falling even _more_ asleep - and still a bit shaken by the previous night, she was not thinking clearly. But hadn't there been something to do with Amiritsu...? not her, not the fake name Sesshoumaru had given her as a joke – but the rambling miko authors friend. The one who seemed to know everything. The real Amiritsu.

There was something about disappearing...disappearing...

What about a rabbit hole...? No, that was Alice in wonkyland...or maybe wonkaland...

Kagome drifted further away into sleep, visions of white rabbits with candied stopwatches dancing in her head.

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Sesshoumaru examined the road, alternating between drowsily noting the trees and the scents on the wind, and watching Kagome from the corner of his eye. He hadn't objected to holding her hand – she had fallen asleep again, resting, recuperating, and either he was nearly as tired, or yawns were catching. He felt tired as well.

Maybe it was the bond. It was currently telling him that Kagome was happily asleep. Then again, maybe he was just that tired. The last time he'd been close to this run down was when Kagome had rescued him from the museum. It had taken him a few days of rest to recoup. At least this time he wasn't quite as hungry...

Sesshoumaru watched the back of Tosa's head as he ran beside Satsuma, talking with her in a quiet voice. Sesshoumaru did not eavesdrop on their conversation, though he did wonder what exactly they were going to do when they got the Aizu.

There was a brief stop for lunch, which interrupted his thoughts somewhat, as did the leave-taking of the two young miko. Momiji and Botan, seeing another road to take, had left the party of youkai behind. They stopped to wish the still sleeping Kagome well, but did not wake her up. Sesshoumaru watched them go after lunch (eaten on the run) and brooded in silence.

He knew that they had to do something. He just didn't know what it would be, aside from toppling the already weakened Purists. If they could only free the north from their control...then the lands would be united. Ready for action.

...just as soon as they figured out what to do, of course.

That was the rub, right there. Sesshoumaru turned his full attention (which, understandably, had been preoccupied with getting past Damia till quite recently) towards the new problem. Or rather, an old problem which had yet to go away. Or just one big problem Damia had been part of. Or...something.

He had a fairly good idea of what _not_ to do, at least, even if very little idea of what _should _be done.

They couldn't get rid of the humans; they would just keep coming. There was really nowhere that he knew of that the youkai could go to get away from them. There would be more miko like Momiji and Botan, waiting to fight them if they tried...

Can't get rid of, can't escape. That left...resignation.

He supposed that some youkai could, like he had, wear enchanted necklaces similar to the ones Kagome had made for him. They could blend in. Trade. Tanuma was already doing something along those lines, with his kitsune agents. They had a small, hidden network on Nagasaki, watching the Dutch traders. (There was one called Ben, of particular interest, last he had heard...)

The idea might have a small amount of appeal to some youkai, but he couldn't really imagine it as the next new trend in youkai fashion. Only a few youkai were – he admitted privately – willing to even _talk_ to humans on a more or less equal basis, let alone live with, trade with, and pretend to be, human. Before Kagome, he would have outright refused as well, (possibly by sending the messenger home in several pieces) and so would many youkai of similar mind if it was forced...

It was an okay idea, but...hardly a solution. Sesshoumaru shook his head. Still worth suggesting to Tanuma though. He had a feeling that there would be more minds open to the idea in the South. They were more exposed to new ideas down there, more willing to try new things than the stuffy North, or the more 'as is' of West and East. Maybe some would take the offer if it was made...

Well, maybe - maybe he was simply deluded.

Sesshoumaru irritably swept his hair back out of his face, and glanced at Kagome, reassuring himself that she remained peacefully sleep. He calmed slightly. There was time to think, yet, especially now that they didn't have Damia breathing down their necks anymore...even the two kidnapped miko had gone, now, leaving only Mesau of that group, and she was a prisoner.

Maybe Kagome would know something – she was always smart. Tosa, Satsuma, Tanuma, and Sorai...they might get more information that would help make a decision.

But in the meantime...Sesshoumaru calmed himself down, aware that his emotions would likely travel back across the bond and disturb her rest. Kagome would need all the sleep she could get right now.

Come to think of it, so could he...

Sesshoumaru leaned back, shifting his weight slightly, and dropped into a catnap for the remainder of the trip to Aizu city. Someone could wake him up when they got there.

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Tosa surreptitiously glanced back at his friend, miraculously whole and healthy – and rather unwilling to let go of Kagome for some reason...

Tosa hadn't yet worked out exactly _why_ this was so – Sesshoumaru had explained in great detail some things that had happened last night, but not everything. (Would definitely make for interesting black...er...conversation... material later though...)

So, all he really knew was what he'd been told, and what Mesau, also riding under guard in the far end of the wagon (since she could hardly walk on those legs...) had filled in of her and Damia's half of the plan, in a resigned sort of way. Tosa and his group of plotting sidekicks had filled in a fairly good idea of what had happened in the clearing, at least. Then...

Sesshoumaru had said they had escaped and attacked when Damia followed them. Fine – Mesau's and Botan's version of events were about the same. They had followed, and then walked into an ambush. But what wasn't explained was how on earth Kagome had survived her initial wounds, and what she and Sesshoumaru had been up to in the time not accounted for. Damia and Mesau, until the tables had been turned, had thought her dead.

Tosa wondered – there had, at one point, been some sort of talk about blood bonds...but he didn't know for sure. He sighed. Too bad the other two miko had left earlier, when they had passed close to the last human town before going to Aizu. He might have been able to ask them about it. But...Sesshoumaru had been right there, watching him, so he hadn't had an opportunity to ask. And Momiji and Botan had both wished to disappear quickly and quietly. Tosa suspected that being in the company of so many powerful youkai had unnerved them a bit.

He kinda disliked that idea. He wasn't _that_ scary, surely? He'd tried very hard to be a good host, and Satsuma had glossed over his grosser errors, like offering them food when he'd forgotten to, but...oh well. Some humans were just like that...

He glanced back again, passing his gaze over the cart and its now-three occupants: Mesau under guard, and the two sleepy survivors of last night, Kagome and Sesshoumaru. (Tosa was quite interested to note how closely they were sitting...and now they were holding hands! If that wasn't proof _something_ was up, he'd eat his samurai armor...)

Sorai and Tanuma drifted in and out of view, scouting Satsuma walked beside him. Tosa turned towards his Lady, who wore a small, slightly smug smile and had since this morning.

It was a bit...off putting. Rather like a nonverbal 'I told you so...'

Heh. Well, Satsuma had given him plenty of those, in her time. He didn't really mind. It was her way of quietly teasing him.

Tosa broke off his train of thought for the moment, and briefly checked the position of the sun in the sky. It was nearing the western horizon, dipping low. That meant dinner soon. With that happy thought in mind, Tosa began to examine the road markers, which, until now, he hadn't been paying more than half a mind to.

"Are we there yet, Satsuma?"

"No, Tosa. Stop asking. You should have been watching to see that last milepost."

"But...'Tsuma, I was busy thinking and missed it. What did it say?" Tosa gave his lady what he hoped was a winning smile, and failed miserably, managing more a hopeful, puppy dog grin.

Satsuma sighed, and looked, ever so faintly, upwards. "I can see why you'd miss it – thinking must have required your full attention." Tosa's charming smile faltered a bit. "But, for your information, that was the marker where the Ina road joined the trail. Three more markers and we should be at the pass." Satsuma gave him a small smile.

"That answer your questions?"

Tosa's mind raced furiously. That was pretty much it, yep. Except... "So you think we'll get there in time for dinner?" He couldn't quite keep the faint note of excitement from his voice. He had fond, fond memories of Aizu's cooks...

Satsuma closed her eyes in a amused, half resigned sort of way. "Yes, Tosa. We should be there in time for a late dinner..."

"Excellent!"

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Sorai had been paying far closer attention to the road than Tosa had been – by the time they had passed another marker, she had come in closer to the cart, and nudged the dosing Sesshoumaru awake.

"We should be there soon, my lord."

Sesshoumaru woke up, and glanced at Sorai. "I am no longer the lord of the west, Sorai."

"I am sure, once we get to Aizu, that rectifying that will be the councils first action, Sesshoumaru."

Sesshoumaru smiled slightly. "Perhaps. Was there something you wanted to discuss?"

Sorai smiled in return. "Nothing hugely important. I thought that you might want to be awake before we get to the Aizu pass, is all." She inclined her head to Sesshoumaru, and then drifted to the back of the traveling group, and within a few short moments, had once again vanished back into the underbrush of the road.

Sesshoumaru examined the road; there were no markers up ahead, but there was one dwindling behind them, and it looked like the one that meant they were close to the pass. The ground had started to rise, and had grown more rocky. The trail was no longer packed gravel and dried mud, but paved stone. They were within the boundaries of Aizu for sure, then.

He glanced at the sun, and guessed that within the hour they would have come to the pass. Sesshoumaru dropped into thought, remembering the first time, and the many times since then, that he had come this way.

Aizu had little real power – but it was often used for councils between lords, being, as it was, somewhat more neutral ground. It was also, by tradition, where the youkai high lords and some of the more important court officials came for funerals of state, or weddings. He had come to Satsuma and Tosa's wedding here, so long ago. That had been one of the more happy occasions he had attended in Aizu.

The pass itself was quite impressive. Closer in, statues and stone carvings, lining the paved road, would appear. For now it was only the road that showed any sign of nearby civilization. In part, the stones were there to show power, and to facilitate use. The road was old, old as the long ago first youkai Emperor...it served in part as a reminder of that.

But there was also a far more practical reason for it. Built into the very stones was ancient youki – the youkai equivalent of a ward against humans. No human would have wandered into the center of youkai power voluntarily – and unless they were miko, or a priest, they would be unable to even _see _the road.

In the time of the Emperor, such measures had been a luxurious sort of pest control – humans were not a real bother, they were simply an occasional annoyance. By now...such measures were quite important. It meant that Aizu would remain a secret city, no matter how hard it was looked for. It was built of stone, and though it was a ruin in some places, most of the city remained a proud home to nearly 6000 souls. Humans could not come near, could not enter unless invited (or if they were miko, perhaps, and strong ones!) and had always left the valley alone, subconsciously leaving it be. They couldn't enter without an initiation...although once shown the way, a miko could return.

Sesshoumaru smiled as he thought of the last time he had been here. Today would, no doubt, be much happier.

He looked down at Kagome, still dead to the world, and then looked with that new sense, the one that connected them both. It would probably tell him a lot more about how she was doing right now than a cursory look would.

Tired, still, that he could tell. But not exhausted. His stomach growled, and he smiled slightly. Probably, she would be as hungry as he was on waking. Healing took energy, and that energy had to come from somewhere...

He wondered what Kagome would think of Aizu. She would be one of the few humans to have wondered at the ancient city. Humans were not unknown within its walls, but few ever came there.

Gently, he shook her shoulder, wanting to wake her enough so that she could see the beginning of the road into the fortress-city of Aizu.

Sesshoumaru's lips twitched as Kagome rolled over, muttering.

"Kagome...Kagome..."

One beady eye emerged from the fluffy tail she had been wrapped up in, still bleary form sleep. "Whad'ya want?"

"I thought you might like to see our entry into Aizu. It is quite impressive."

"What, we're there already?" Kagome sat up, letting the limp mass of tail slide off of her shoulders, where it curled on the bed of the cart before being reclaimed by Sesshoumaru, who let it rest once more on his shoulder.

"No, not quite. But we're close. The road is paved, see? And, up ahead...ah. That must be the last marker. We're nearly within sight of it."

Kagome sat up a little straighter, as an enormous statue appeared around the bend, holding out a scroll covered in ancient, slightly unfamiliar characters.

"Does it say...'Welcome to Aizu and enjoy your stay, please visit the gift shop?'" Kagome hazarded a guess as to what the oddly angled writing said.

"No – it merely states 'Aizu'" Sesshoumaru looked sideways at her. "What is a gift shop?"

As they traveled up the road, passing more and more fantastically carved statues of youkai, Kagome attempted to explain the concept behind a gift shop. All the while, she looked hungrily at the elaborate stone kitsune, dragons, snakes, dogs, firebirds... the list was as varied as the statues...

When they drew even with another curve in the mountain road, though, and got their first glimpse of the city, Kagome stopped explaining, and stared.

Aizu was...beautiful. It was girded by a low wall, but mostly for ornamental purposes – the old stones were covered in green plant life, and surrounded by gardens. The wall was broken in places, letting her see the continuing gardens inside, and the buildings. Some of the outlying building were broken, covered in moss, but many of the multi-tiered houses remained in good upkeep, becoming more elaborate the closer to the palace they came...

Stone, and elegantly carved wood, all in an old, old style, like, and yet unlike, what she had seen in her history books. These were Japanese homes, perhaps – they were certainly not American – but they were not a Japan she had ever seen.

They were a little like the Southern palace, but that was much newer compared to this, she guessed. A quick inquiry of Sesshoumaru confirmed her guess; Aizu had stood for millenia before the domain's palaces had ever been built. Most of the buildings from the imperial era, aside from those in Aizu itself, had been abandoned, rebuilt or remodeled in the years of war since then.

They entered the wide swung, rusted gates of the city, and Kagome craned to look everywhere. The streets were hardly packed, but there were still far more youkai here, and of many different kinds, than she had ever seen before. There was a small market up one street, thronged with people. Kagome even grinned as she saw a group of youkai youngsters run past, hitting each other with wooden bokens. A city, a real city...perhaps by modern standards, 6000 was a small number. A town, or a village. Here, though, it was quite impressive...

Kagome flushed as some of the young youkai stopped what they were doing, and took a good look at her. They stared, as though they had never even seen a human before...which might be the case, she supposed, if they had grown up in Aizu...

The sun was just setting on the peaks of the mountains behind the city, sinking away into the west, when the party approached the palace gate at last, after traveling through the streets. Kagome stared about her, not saying anything just taking it in, as they were greeted, and the surprised guards hastily retreated to debate sleeping arrangements for a few minutes, leaving them just inside the courtyard. She'd guess it was between seven or eight at night. Kagome surreptitiously dug in her bag of things, and found her watch. (Satsuma had been kind enough to reclaim it from where had dropped it by the well. There wasn't much in it, but she was still glad to have it back.) It was 7:46 in the evening.

She hid her watch again, and then watched the housing arrangements with interest. Apparently, Sesshoumaru presented a hosting challenge to them. Put him in his accustomed rooms – the chamber reserved for the Western Lord or Lady, or a guest room, or...?

Tosa's helpful shout of 'Well he _will_ be lord soon – Damia's dead, you know!' hadn't really helped matters either.

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Kagome watched as eventually a quiet legion of servants was assigned to their party. She and Sesshoumaru were herded one way, and the Southern party another. Sorai was taken in another direction entirely, presumably to the western wing of the palace.

Her eyes taking everything in, from the multi-storied roofs to the beautiful decorating everywhere, Kagome followed along behind.

It had been decided by their near silent guide, after a few questions to Sesshoumaru that, since between them she and Sesshoumaru had one complete spare set of clothes that wasn't bloody, muddy, otherwise stained or ripped to pieces, they would be provided with such for a few nights.

Suited her fine. The only outfit that _might_ have been fancy enough for a place like this that she had ever owned was that hand-woven tsumugi silk miko outfit – since sold to Urahara. Oh- and maybe that really cute kimono her grandmother had given her for her birthday when she was 7. Not that it would fit now.

They were quickly directed through a maze of corridors – and she'd thought that the southern palace was bad! This was worse! - and, at last, taken to a separate wing.

Beside her, Sesshoumaru began to frown. Kagome could feel his unease, but had no idea what had caused it.

Sesshoumaru wasn't quite uneasy, per say. More...uncomfortable which where they appeared to be going, which looked to be close to where his mothers old rooms had been, here. She had, after a few visits, insisted on her own suite close to, but not quite in, the Western domains area of the palace. From what he could remember, it had been turned into a guest room after she had died in one of the last attacks on Aizu during the civil unrest, before Aizu was declared by all to be neutral ground.

Father was always running around fighting battles. Important battles, but to a young youkai, those mattered little, though hindsight gave understanding. Mother had raised him, and then, at a young age, she had run off for Aizu and not come back till they reclaimed her to bury, in the snow of midwinter.

He was not at all pleased to have her suite of rooms to stay in, but from another's point of view, it made sense. He wasn't officially lord of anything, now. They'd put him in the Western wing, but not the lords suite, to try and rectify the problem. Sound enough logic...

Damn. It was to be her old room after all. They pulled up outside the door and were shown where the robes, extra clothes and the route to the bathhouse was. They were left alone with a promise of being sent for for dinner in a bit, with the rest of their party and the steward of Aizu, Shu. Sesshoumaru had explained about Shu earlier to Kagome; he was a bit like the mayor of the city, but since part of the rules around Aizu's neutrality forbade him to have military force, he was rather useless as anything more than a civilian caretaker, as youkai viewed things. Aizu was, apart from being home to court officials and host of political debates, a home to the older youkai, or those who wanted the reassurance of peace. For if the peace of Aizu was broken one time too often, you could be exiled...left for the wolves of the domains.

The sliding door was closed behind them, and Sesshoumaru and Kagome were alone inside the beautiful room, sore, travel worn, and hungry, but with a promise of food.

Kagome stared around her. This was as nice as their room in the South – perhaps a bit nicer. It was old, and definitely upper class. A bit larger, too. Slightly worrying...

Sesshoumaru looked around, and sighed. Kagome frowned at him. "Why so down? I mean..." she hurried over to the side of the room, a grin on her face. "We actually get clean clothes! Score!"

She placed her tatty bag, with an equally ratty miko uniform inside on top of snacks and her digital watch, on the floor, and carefully picked up the new clothes, eager for a quick bath and clean clothing.

But... "Sesshoumaru?" He felt...sad. And she had no idea why...

Sesshoumaru glanced at the window, and shook his head. "As it is, we barely have enough time to wash up and change. After dinner, I will explain but for now, there is hardly enough time."

Kagome nodded, happy that she was trusted enough to be told – and without the usual browbeating required to get the information. Either Sesshoumaru was dead tired still (a possibility) or he might, heavens forbid, be opening up a small amount...

That said, both hurried to make themselves presentable for the meeting with this Shu person, and the others at dinner.

Kagome smiled all the way through her bath, grateful to be able to slide the mud and grime of travel – and especially of yesterdays adventures, which hadn't really been properly addressed till now – from her skin. It felt very nice to be able to get clean again!

After, she struggled with the loaner fancy kimono, and eventually managed to get it more or less on. Layer on layer of fine, light silk, and an Obi that had seemed miles long...

She'd never been so dressed up in her life. Fun, in a way, disconcerting in others.

When she was done teasing the last of her hair back into a smooth mass of black, she peeked out through the sliding door.

Sesshoumaru was waiting, in his own loaner kimono, in his house colours, though lacking any official insignia. Together, they waited the small amount of time that it took for them to be sent for, and descended towards dinner.

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For Kagome, dinner was a bit of a blur when she tried to remember it. She was mostly just concentrating on trying to eat – eat a _lot_ – without appearing too unmannered, and then not falling asleep again halfway through. The conversation revolved around the lives of people she had never met, and cared nothing about. She forgot most of it long before the end of the evening.

There was no mention of Damia, or the current issues at hand. The host, Shu, was a blur of blue hakama in between dishes.

It was all good food, at least. Very good, even if some was unrecognizable. She vaguely remembered a few odd looks for being at the table with Sesshoumaru, Tosa, Satsuma and the two spies. (The rest hadn't been invited) but she just assumed it was because of that stupid rumor about Sesshoumaru and a human running off together.

Oh well.

There was food. That was the most important thing at this point...

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Afterwards, she might not have remembered dinner, but she had a far better recollection of Sesshoumaru's explanation of the room – and telling her what would happen tomorrow.

Sesshoumaru led the way back to the room after dinner – he suspected Kagome wouldn't know the way back. The palace was confusing for anyone on their first visit – but luckily he had been there before. He was less familiar with the room provided, but he could at least find it again out of the dozen others in the area.

Softly, Sesshoumaru slid the door back and both travelers entered the suite, exhausted but quite happy and full. The cooks hadn't bothered with fancy, more with 'filling' for the tired bunch of people who had come.

He had picked up a number of things at dinner that Kagome hadn't. Ezo was here, for one – that was useful to know. She'd arrived earlier in the day, in the afternoon. Choshu wasn't here yet, but that wasn't really a shock. He was always late.

They could do nothing of great import tomorrow, not while Choshu was gone. But he could walk around the palace, and seek out some of the courtiers who were currently here, reassure people that he was both alive, and that Damia was _not._ Sesshoumaru was prepared to tell the revised edition of his 'rescue' that they had long go shared with Tosa and Satsuma – that Kagome had sprung him from his scroll-induced prison, and that they had then begun working towards Damia's end a few months ago.

Kagome...he was going to introduce her as the Shikon miko, if she agreed. That would reinforce the idea that while he was quite close to her, he wasn't intimately involved and hadn't eloped with her, or some other silly idea that Damia had put about. The rumor of him running off with a human woman ended _right now._

"Kagome?"

"Yes, Sesshoumaru?" Kagome was standing by the window, and the twilight moon provided more than enough light for him to pick her out.

He found himself distracted, and then shook his head, focusing. "For tomorrow, the council is not meeting. Most likely that will be three days from now. In the meantime, I plan to...ah..._reassure_ those that might be surprised by my return. I had planned to ask you to accompany me. The same story that we told Tosa and Satsuma...?"

"Ah. Right. You were stuck as a rock till a month ago and then we fixed it, that sorta thing?"

"Yes."

Kagome eyed him shrewdly. "Had you told Tosa about the bond yet?"

"No, I haven't."

"Probably a good idea. He might...gossip."

"Might?" Sesshoumaru raised an eyebrow. "Theres no 'might' about it. It'd be spread over the city within hours. He'd not share it if specifically asked not to, but...I think, for the moment, that it would be easier to avoid it altogether. I'd like to keep that hidden for now, or it might do more harm than good."

"I understand – I'd wondered a little bit myself, but hadn't gotten that far yet. I don't really know how youkai stuff works the way you do." Kagome nodded, frowning, thinking. She felt, to Sesshoumaru, as though food had done her good, but she was still a bit under the weather. Just like he was.

"And...I believe I owe you a story."

"Oh! I'd nearly forgotten..."

Sesshoumaru smiled. She hadn't _really_ forgotten, but she hadn't pressed for information either. Kagome knew him, by now, knew he wouldn't forget a promise.

"This room...it belonged to my mother, a very long time ago. She left when I was about 8 in human years. Aizu was not neutral ground then, not like it is now. It was a bit of a ruin, and everyone vying for the old throne. After she had gone and lived here for a few years, there was an attack. She never came back form Aizu, just a long letter, and a body. We buried her at home, you see."

Sesshoumaru sighed, and moved to stand by Kagome, at the window under the moon. Tonight, it was clear. There was no sign of rain at all.

Kagome radiated concern, and curiosity, but said nothing, letting him finish. "I came with father to collect her - this was her room. I haven't come back since, but I still remember...it was different then. Darker. She liked red...dark burgundy..."

Kagome tentatively reached out a hand, and placed it on his shoulder. "I'm sorry. Maybe...maybe this time you'll have some happy memories from here, to go with the bad."

Sesshoumaru smiled slightly, shadows cast by the moon running down his face. "Perhaps. But there is still a long way to go before I count this trip a success."

"Oiy! What about Damia?" Kagome asked playfully. "That was a success!"

"Well – the part of the trip that involves Aizu." Sesshoumaru clarified. "_That_, at least, is over, thankfully..." He turned to face Kagome, and smiled.

Moonlight really did suit her, he thought. Kagome had always been beautiful – he'd known it but it had never really registered before. Why, or how, he did not know.

A lot that hadn't registered before was now pouring in, he'd noticed.

Sesshoumaru blinked slightly as he thought of how he'd saved her, and thought beyond, for the first time, what the immediate reaction was. Yes, he'd saved Kagome. That had been most important. But...it would also mean a lot more, in days to come.

Such a bond carried...consequences.

Most of them were good. He didn't mind being able to sense her feelings, in a tight, dim fire at the back of his skull. She had generally been open enough with them anyway. It meant that, if she was hurt, or in trouble, needed help...he would know to do something about it a little faster.

But there were a lot of other things. She'd been able to heal much faster, and _he_, he suspected, would be able to heal far quicker from any injury a miko besides her gave him. He had also been able to feel the ancient youki within the road leading to the city much more strongly today – perhaps it was due to that. He would have to test for it. There wasn't that much in the way of documentation on bonds and their effects – a bond, especially one of the type they shared, equal footing, not something crude like a slave bond, were very, very rare.

He suspected that Kagome could hear, and see, much better than she had been able to before. He had felt her miko power working towards helping him heal earlier. And...perhaps most important, in the long run...

She was going to be stuck with him for quite a long time. That was the most well known effect. As long as he lived, in fact. Even if she moved to the other end of the world, possibly even if she ran through the well and sealed the gates of time behind her, she was going to be a very long lived human. Perhaps she would die earlier, stolen away by violence – but barring that...not that he minded keeping her closer for a bit longer than the average human...

Oh dear. He wondered if Kagome had given any thought to it at all.

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Kagome, in fact, had not. The only things on her mind were the nagging feeling that she just wanted to go to bed and crash, and careful thinking involving the story Sesshoumaru had just told her. Even had she been thinking about the bond, she had only really considered the immediate results, nothing long term – unlike Sesshoumaru she hadn't heard about them till very recently and wasn't as familiar with the stories and rumors.

So many secrets to Sesshoumaru...Kagome felt grateful to be trusted with some of them. And...he was a friend that she trusted enough to tell anything to. She'd been through so much with him in such a short time...it felt like she had known him for much longer than she actually had. Or at least, known him as he was now, for much longer.

She'd since decided that the day she'd first met him and he tried to kill her was a bit of a mistake, one she'd kick under the carpet of life. There was a better side to him than that, even if it took a great deal of work to draw it out.

Looking up at him, framed by the window, Kagome smiled. He looked so much like Inuyasha. And yet...not.

Inuyasha had been a very large part of her life, once. But she had let go at last, just as Sesshoumaru was, slowly, letting go of Rin. Or perhaps...not letting go. Not exactly. More...accepting, remembering the good and the bad, and realizing that those were simply what was, that people lived on in your memory, in others memories. Neither was gone, not while others remembered them, remembered themselves the good times.

Possibly, Damia had had a few good points too. Somewhere.

So had Jaken, maybe. Kagome absently wondered what had happened to the green kappa. Maybe Damia had used him for a football too.

Kagome shook her head, remembering the long trips with Inuyasha, Sango and Miroku. And Shippo.

Sesshoumaru, and Rin, the way they had been before she met Sesshoumaru again, and the world changed things a bit. He looked so much like Inuyasha, acted a bit like him sometimes, but they were different people, and she'd been lucky to get to know both of them very well.

Kagome smiled, thinking back to the day she'd accidentally woken Sesshoumaru, the day he'd eaten chocolate, her attempts at necklace making, and shikikami, fighting back to back in the village...

She'd have to go visit Shippo in the village, as soon as she could. In between nearly getting killed and running around today, that visit had never happened...

At least it had been a surprise one – he hadn't known she never made it. She'd have to go back and visit.

She even had chocolate for him, in a slightly squashed package in the bottom of her bag. Amazingly, it had survived last night too.

Kagome blinked, still looking at Sesshoumaru, and gave his shoulder a quick, nervous pat. Too handsome for his own good, in the moonlight...

"I don't know about you, but I'm going to bed. See you in the morning, alright?"

Sesshoumaru bade her good night with a grin. "Yes – just not _too_ early."

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_Woohoo for a little more filler, and a little bit of fluff and stuff. Typed this on the road to the Crows Nest pass – killed my lappy battery. XD (and heres to random easter egg__**s**__! XD "That sounds like a challenge..." )_

_...Yeah, the number of reviews has officially scared me. You guys rock. Thanks so much for dropping a line! (Big, silly grin) _

_Wrapping things up – I'm sure you can feel an ending getting close once most of the loose ends are dealt with. I'll try to post soon again, but university begins next week so I can't promise anything other than I'll try._

_Thanks for reading (possibly, reviewing) this monstrous insane plotbunny...(big grin)_


	41. HIATUS

_**Hiatus:**_

I felt it only fair to tell you that, while I continue to plan on finishing this story, there will not be any updates for _Quite_ a while. (this likely being December, when there is a small end in sight. Before then...doubt I'll have much more than enough spare time to check email. )

University has taken over life once again...I've already been forced to quit the job, because after a months worth of getting up at 5:30 weekdays and weekends, in and out to work and then fall into bed past 11 nothing much accomplished, I was pretty beat.

...I really don't get how people have time to party away university sometimes. Far-too-many studio courses. Lol.

So to be fair, though I'd leave you this note, telling the score. Theres some amazing people who (this is _why_ they're amazing) haven't yet given up on me and my 'updating habits' in disgust. XD Thanks for the reviews and kind words, but...I doubt I'll have time to work on anything much before December. If you do get an update, it'll be a bonus and completely random. Sorry, guys, but my doodle classes come first!

(if you want to see what I'm doing, feel free to visit the website where it all is. XD Way for self plugging. XDXD )


	42. ch40:Feel me

**Disclaimer:** Even greater than Takahashi are the minds of Simon Travaglia and VALVe (seriously, awesome) – I definitely own nothing but the claim to have snitched the idea of lager and of their adorable cubes, respectively. Or 'Tommy'...

**:: Feel me ::**

Mornings were not meant to be this early, Kagome mused as she floated up from the depths of sleep. Sunlight, weak and low angled, danced across the covers of the futon she was currently nestled in. The sun had just barely crested the horizon. She turned her head, and could just see across the room Sesshoumaru's silver hair peeking out from under the covers, beyond the shoji screen.

Amazingly, he was not yet awake...Kagome rummaged though her bag, and pulled out the hidden watch. No wonder – it was 5:30. But no doubt he'd be up soon...

She gingerly investigated along the shared bond, and smiled at what she found. Sesshoumaru didn't really feel tired to her anymore, not like before. She was actually surprised _she_ was up this early, and at how awake she felt. Not completely normal perhaps, but much better than expected...Kagome quickly glanced at her arm, and shook her head. Last night the long scab from Damia's knife had been quite visible. This morning, it was a shiny, newly pink scar...within a week, it might be gone altogether.

Youkai healing never ceased to amaze her.

She glanced again at Sesshoumaru, and thought back over the day of travel yesterday, and the arrival in Aizu, quickly placing herself and her situation. Today...the two of them were going to run around court and show that they were, in fact, alive as far as she could recall. Had to be done, though she doubted she would enjoy it.

Kagome smiled, slightly. That would also show others that they were in a business partnership, not the more colorful one rumor painted. Although privately, she had to wonder how much truth was in that. Watching Sesshoumaru, and thinking over what they had done, and the feelings of peace that had come from simply being together, not saying anything...

They were, if _nothing_ else, friends, good friends, not mere business acquaintances. Kagome hadn't ever really thought past that in detail – it was something she hadn't dared look at. Saying the wrong thing could have been a real mess, and so she she'd never said, never considered. Sesshoumaru had always been, well, just...Sesshoumaru to her. Untouchable youkai lord in an ivory white tower. She thought back to her easy invasion of his personal space, and the repeated treatment of tail as a blanket. He must be comfortable with her at least, to allow that...

When had that changed? Kagome pondered silently. She couldn't quite remember when his personal space had been a wall, and when she had begun to intrude. It had been inch by inch, so slowly she hadn't even realized she was growing closer, not until she stood back and thought of it.

Perhaps the greatest change had been the night before they went South. The night Sesshoumaru had gone digging for statues...she had wanted very badly to give him a hug, then, and she had, in a way, later that evening. Half an arm around a shoulder, at least. That was one of the first times she had gotten close to him while awake, had reached out, had patted him on the wrist. The first time she'd _wanted_ to hold him, to try and steady him, to be supportive, to comfort. He hadn't minded, hadn't said anything of that night since, not really, but things had changed after then between them too...

She had a feeling that their friendship would probably change yet again because of what they had done. That bond...

She hadn't had time to think heavily on it, on the past few days, on how close they had grown even before Damia had pretended to try and murder her. She had been far too tired, and there had been _far_ too much going on. But now, with the clarity of dawn, she took a few precious moments to sit up in her futon, and watch Sesshoumaru's even breathing, head propped in her hand.

She didn't know how that friendship might change, but it surely would, somehow. Perhaps it would grow stronger. Perhaps, perhaps. There were a number of different ways to go, and Kagome forced herself to think of all of them. They might get very sick of one another, and, like a pair of fuzzy dice companion cubes, start plotting to stab, possibly kill one another. She really didn't want that to happen, but...if you were to consider _every_ possible outcome...

The middle path was no real change – respectful distance, friends, nothing more or less. It would be nice, but...a gut feeling told her that that path was by far the most unlikely. Things couldn't stay the same, not really. They had their roots in long ago, and this had only made that slow change more apparent. She had started this a few months ago, now, when she had gone cleaning in the museum. The moment she had decided to help Sesshoumaru, things had been set in motion.

That night in the rain, the explorations of the modern city...They had grown a little closer then. Now – well. Third choice. Kagome blushed slightly. More than friends. Kagome wasn't quite sure how she felt about _that_ idea. It gave her butterflies on crack in the stomach. It was...a nice thought. But only a thought. Sesshoumaru...she liked him, she really did, and she had a feeling that she could like him a lot more if she ever... Kagome quickly stuffed that thought in the back of her mind. She didn't need distractions around. He'd probably run the other way as fast as he could anyway if he even suspected she had been thinking...what _had_ she been thinking...? She couldn't...

She didn't regret the actions – she was glad to be still alive, thank you, and she had made her choice long before. But it did mean a lot of things would inevitably have to change. A bond like that...it meant so many things. Practically speaking. Yes. Practical. Good idea.

Kagome sat back, ruthlessly squashing all fluffy thoughts from her mind. She had to focus. The last thing poor Sesshoumaru needed, while trying to squash any rumors of him running off with a human, was her getting weird ideas. Practical. Yes.

The largest difference would have to be in lifespan – no normal human lived hundreds of years. She would live at least as long as Sesshoumaru would, or thereabouts, now. And he was young, as youkai reckoned things...probably 20, 21 in human terms.

Kagome shook her head. It seemed far off, unreal. She hadn't even lived a normal lifespan yet! And all of a sudden the possibility of an extra few hundred years had dropped on her...it was something she didn't feel quite up to dealing with. She suspected that was far from the only thing that would change either. She had a funny suspicion that her nose hadn't been nearly this good before – and things seemed louder, or they had, at one point, like when she was three and had had an ear infection – when it was gone the world seemed so loud till she was used to it again – she could have sworn then that she could hear the wind whispering in the hair around her neck, yesterday.

All this would take a lot of getting used to...

She'd have time to adjust, though. This was what, the second day? Technically the first – she'd spent so much time sleeping, healing, till now. Such things took time to sink in, she knew. The whole idea was an abstract intellectual one at the moment. Later on she would be able to figure out what it meant to her on a more personal level.

Kagome smiled as she watched the light fall across the silver hair peeling out from the other futon. At least, she mused, inwardly chuckling, she hadn't picked _bad_ looking company to be with for a few hundred odd years...Sesshoumaru was no eyesore, and despite the cool exterior, she had good reason to believe he cared far more than he let on.

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The light sound of laughing was what woke him; Kagome seemed to be amused by something. Inwardly Sesshoumaru smiled, eyes still shut. He could feel the carefree thoughts from here. They could all do with a little more laughing after the past few days...

Today was simply going to be a day of rest, he hoped. No world ending, no youkai to duel, nothing more pressing than socializing with the court of Aizu. A task that was tedious at times perhaps, but hardly straining.

Well...unless he was forced to spend the whole day in the company of the various female airheads of the court, or some of the male ones who wanted to been seen talking, but had nothing of import to say. They only wanted to trap him into deals or to gain social standing from talking with a superior. Luckily for him, he didn't think _that_ would start up again till after he had been renamed as western lord. It was unlikely the wheeling and dealing would begin now; people would still be too unsure of him to commit to anything.

If anything, the largest headache would be repeating a dozen times the same story for everyone to hear and carry to others in the grapevine gossip of Aizu...an unpleasant task, but one which did need attending to.

Sesshoumaru finally opened his eyes, and turned to smile slightly at Kagome, who had been peering at him around the shoji screen. "Good morning."

"Good morning!" Sesshoumaru could have sworn he could feel the sparkles of cheeriness flashing off the words...that was Kagome all over. She was definitely feeling better.

Sesshoumaru sat up and pushed the covers back, walking to the window with more grace than he had the previous night – and with far less stiffness to the gait. The window showed him the gardens he had missed seeing last night – he remembered the stone pathway, but a few of the plants were different, new. There was a bonsai tree not too far away that he did not remember being here, and a new pond, perhaps with koi. It had been a long time since he had come to this part of the palace.

He half heard, half felt, Kagome get out of bed and wander across the floor, bare feet making little noise on the tatami. "Is it a nice day out?"

"Yes, it is – if you wish, I could show you some of Aizu." Sesshoumaru smiled slightly "I believe, at a previous point, you demanded a 'tour' be given?"

Kagome grinned. "I thought you'd forgotten that – and you already took me around Tosa's place, right?"

"True – but Aizu is different. It still is not the West, but perhaps later you will see the West as well."

Kagome grinned, and leaned outside a bit more, the morning breeze playing with the fine dark strands of her bangs. "At this rate, I'll have seen most of the youkai capitols, right? Bet not many humans can claim that!"

Sesshoumaru shook his head. "No, that they cannot. Very few indeed come to Aizu. I cannot think of the last to visit." That was the truth – he could hardly remember a time when he'd seen a human in Aizu – or at least one who was there not as someone's pet plaything. Occasionally that had been known to happen. He'd never really approved of that, even before spending so much time with mortals. His view was, if they were in the way, they were killed, if they were not, and useful enough as they were, then they were to be left alone so long as they were not a bother. Not played with. Now, he didn't think he would approve at all of 'pets' – and if he was renamed lord, he had considered slightly...revising...a few things in how the rules were laid out at home...

Kagome shook her head, and tuned away from the garden, looking for her bag. "So - what's the plotting for today supposed to be?" She pushed to one side the earlier musings about the connection between herself and Sesshoumaru, settling for talk of the mundane.

She couldn't sense as much as she had last night from him – perhaps it was that he had more mental control, or that she was in a better frame of mind, not wheeling blindly through life, half dead. Either way, she could feel little else than the fact that he was awake, close by, and slightly hungry.

Kagome thought uneasily of earlier. Probably a good thing, in the long run...one did not need to share _everything_ in one go...

"I said last night the council was unlikely to meet for the next three days, and definitely not today. I had planned to re-familiarize myself with some of the inhabitants, and see how the wind blows for myself."

Kagome nodded. "Ah, right. Brekkers with Tosa and Satsuma and then off for some serious networking. Should we bring lager?"

Sesshoumaru blinked. "...lager?"

He'd been fine up until she added a completely nonsensical word on the end. What was 'lager'? And why was it relevant?

"Yeah...for greasing the wheels of negotiation!" Kagome grinned. Souta had, unfortunately, hooked her on some of the places on the internet he hung out – one of those being 'The Register'

"...I'm afraid I do not follow you. Is this something like a 'computer'?" Maybe something related to the internet she kept talking about? Net, internet, networking...lager? Sesshoumaru blinked, slightly intrigued. More things from beyond the ken of this time...

"...ah...sure. Yes." Well, technically, you _could_ say that...Kagome grinned. She could, faintly, feel the curiosity echoing back from him, but decided at the last minute to forbear explaining the complex rules involving networking and lager, and programming with hammers.

And...come to think of it, a lot of those wouldn't work on youkai anyway, likely. Darn.

"They put a stack of kimonos for me somewhere, didn't they?" Kagome broke away from the booze, and her mind returned to the practical. Her bag of clothing contained things hardly suitable for the settings she found herself in, even had they been not ripped, dirty, frayed, pierced by various things, bloodstained, or otherwise unsuitable. She fuzzily recalled someone last night giving her a stack of clothing... maybe if she was lucky they had some sort of laundromat too.

"Yes, they did. Over there." Sesshoumaru gestured towards the far corner, where things could be stored. He'd placed a pile of clothing for both himself (since his own wardrobe was in little better shape) and Kagome in there last night, given by the castle servants.

Kagome prowled over, and began picking though things. Last night, she had hardly been awake enough to remember what she'd been wearing, but now, she sorted through what was there, grinning. She felt like a little kid getting to go the the grad dress shop – everything was fancy. Fairytale. Airy silks and heavy smooth shine.

But...at the same time, there were no miko costumes. Kagome frowned. She_ did_ like dress clothes, but didn't think, given the circumstances, they would be entirely... suitable. People might talk...and they wanted to avoid that, she thought uneasily. Yes, avoid that.

Come to think of it, Tosa, she was sure, would be enough all on his own to deal with at breakfast.

And then Kagome laughed.

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Sesshoumaru watched as she dug through the new borrowed clothing from the corner of his eyes, and then blinked. For the second time in as many minutes, she'd confused him again. What was so funny...?

"Because I can simply make my own clothes!" Kagome waved a slightly muddy set of beads at him "– not that I'm going to wear nothing underneath this, but beads...I want to wear miko clothes, you see. Red and white, for once. Green's not quite formal enough. And If I'd have been thinking..."

Sesshoumaru shook his head. Indeed, Kagome was a master of illusion – clothing would probably be easy. He deftly stepped beside her, and picked up an article of clothing he recognized as belonging to him. They must have kept it from his last visit here...whenever that had been.

After finally sorting themselves out, and when they looked presentable, Sesshoumaru led the two of them towards breakfast.

Tosa was already there. Sesshoumaru, not being especially verbose in the mornings, nodded in greeting to him and headed towards his own place, settling down and making himself comfortable.

Tosa, however, had no such restraints, and fairly beamed as Kagome followed Sesshoumaru over and sat down beside him.

"Sesshoumaru! Kagome! I thought you'd _never_ join us! Whatever _kept_ you?" Tosa winked broadly at the both of them, leaving no doubt in anyones mind that he was already beginning to form an opinion on what, exactly, the two of them had been...'up to.'

Kagome rolled her eyes. "Tosa?"

"Yes, lovely miko?" Tosa smiled winningly, and Kagome was suddenly reminded of Miroku, quite strongly. How Satsuma put up with him...amusing though he was, if he was like this _all_ the time...

"Don't you have anything better to do...?" Kagome rolled her eyes, and looked at him sternly.

Satsuma smiled. "Unfortunately not, Kagome. I'm afraid he gets this way when bored...frequently."

"Hey! I'm not bored!"

"Dear, you spent the last hour with Shu talking politics, and the whole night before - talking politics. You are also, might I add, a poor liar." Satsuma smiled pleasantly and patted Tosa on the wrist, daintily continuing to eat rice the whole time with chopsticks.

Tosa, wisely, shut up and decided food was more interesting than conversation at that point.

Kagome hid her grin behind her hand, and began on her own breakfast, asking Satsuma about more innocent activities: what sorts of gardens there were, if there was an archery range, how long she thought they'd be here, about how the council worked...

She and Satsuma spent a happy half hour chatting, while Tosa and Sesshoumaru remained largely silent. Any attempt at wisecracks from Tosa were met by pointed looks from his lady kitsune.

About halfway through breakfast (which was quite a leisurely affair – no one was in any rush to leave, as there was nothing, for once, urgent that needed to be done)Tanuma joined them. At that point, talk became slightly more serious.

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"Ezo has been trying to get ahold of us herself – she wants to talk without some of the more...enthusiastic...of her staff running around." Tanuma smiled slightly. "Choshu should be arriving later – much later - in the day - if we get that cemented before he gets here, things will fall into place easy enough."

It wouldn't be that easy – things never were, bit it was good to speak things plainly. Sesshoumaru listened, and smiled slightly. Things were actually pretty good on the unifying front right now – presumably, if he was reappointed, there would be two domains, west and south, together, and Ezo at least wanted to talk. If the three of them were together, Choshu would probably follow, little question.

Things would be even better if they knew what they would do_ after _that point, but for now, it was enough of a miracle that the domains would be cooperating at all...

In fact... Sesshoumaru rather thought that the last time the domains had actually fully agreed, and all signed to something, was when Aizu itself had been declared neutral ground by all. The fact that there was even a chance at getting the various factions to go in the same direction was a small miracle in itself. A month ago, a few days ago, he would never have believed this was actually happening - despite the fact that it was what he had worked towards ever since Kagome had rescued him from his personal, stony hell...

Throughout this, Tosa and Satsuma had been nodding. "When does she want to meet?"

"Noon – a lunch meeting. I'm afraid you're not invited Sesshoumaru – not being a full lord yet, on, but I will make sure you are informed of what we decide later." Tanuma bowed respectfully in Sesshoumaru's direction. "I'm sure you understand"

Sesshoumaru nodded, privately relived. He had already planned his day, and it hadn't included politics...Tosa could deal with it. Sesshoumaru could do the negotiating if he had to, but Tosa was more than up to it. Served him right, too. He understood as well that as he wasn't a lord, technically, he couldn't really do some of the things he would have before either.

Oh well. He supposed he'd live without a lunch meeting. Hard though it would be, he'd survive. Somehow. Sesshoumaru smiled slightly. Kagome, he was sure, would appreciate the slight touch of sarcasm in the thinking process there.

"That's in about...2 hours, right?"

Tanuma nodded at Kagome. "Yes, it is."

"Then I'm sure Tosa doesn't need us hanging around. Probably has to get ready." Kagome smiled.

Sesshoumaru looked blandly at his longtime friend. "Yes – he likely wishes to have time to go through the dress clothes Satsuma was kind enough to have fitted."

Tosa glared at Sesshoumaru. "Traitor!"

"What n excellent idea, Sesshoumaru!" Satsuma laughed lightly, and smiled at him. Kagome giggled. She hadn't thought he'd had it in him to say something like that – and with such a blank face, too...!

"Now, now, 'Tsuma, there's no need..." Tosa had a faint note of panic in his voice – played up and exaggerated, Kagome was sure. He wasn't actually frightened was he?

"Oh – but there is, dear. You don't want Ezo to think you've not prospered with all the trade, do you? That nice new blue..."

"Help!"

Tosa glared at Sesshoumaru as he was gently being shooed on ahead by Satsuma "I'll get you yet! Just you watch! Bet Kagome makes you wear some silly, stuffed, ruffly..."

"Tosa..." A small frown.

"Yes dear." Not a further sound was heard.

Kagome finally couldn't help herself from laughing at that.

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Sesshoumaru shook his head in amusement as he watched Satsuma gently herding Tosa away, Tanuma not far behind him, face like a poker. Kitsune liked their games...she and Tosa had always been like that, back and forth, playing, teasing. All a private game. They knew one another well enough to get away with it. It had always been a source of entertainment, from his perspective. Occasionally, like today, he'd contributed.

"That was mean of you!" Kagome laughed, and shook her head. "Man, they do carry on – she's as bad as him, isn't she?"

Sesshoumaru nodded. "She is a kitsune – they do tend to enjoy jokes, and games. That's all that is, is a game. Tosa isn't quite as childish as he likes to appear at times."

"No?" Kagome laughed.

"No – sometimes people see that and overlook that he has a more serious side. It's been the cause of more than a few downfalls."

"Ah. I see. Well...that's sort of useful..." Kagome thought it over, and then smiled. "Still funny though." Social camouflage: convince them you're a pair of clowns and they never see when you laugh and pull the rug out from under them. Kagome laughed again, an shook her head. Smart...

"Indeed. Shall we go? I believe I need to find a few people." Sesshoumaru lightly rose to his feet, and Kagome followed him. Breakfast had been finished for a while – they had really only hung around to be sociable. But now that Tosa and Satsuma had things to attend to...

"That would be nice. Where to first?" Kagome smiled, and tucked her hands into the wide, disguised sleeves of her kimono, changed to a brilliant white and red. Miko. Today, she was going to play the role of Kagome, the Shikon miko.

She supposed she ought not to laugh to much. In public anyway – might ruin her image. Such as it was. Kagome smiled, still amused that anyone, much less a crowd of powerful youkai, would know of her, but apparently this was the case...

That was one of the things Satsuma had told her – everyone was going to want to meet the Shikon miko as well as Sesshoumaru – and that maybe if they knew _that, _they wouldn't believe the rumors that Sesshoumaru had arrived with a strange human woman who shared his bed and had stolen him from the west. Or whatever other tales they'd concocted.

Sesshoumaru nodded, and led the way from breakfast to the halls, pointing out in a conversational way the different decorations, and the open courtyards they passed. The gardens were stunning; Kagome was impressed. Aizu might not have a standing army – but it definitely had one armed with garden tools!

Kagome took it all in, and gradually, they began to run into people as others started to look for the gardens and the courtyards, or to find others wot talk with.

The first time that happened, Kagome didn't say much, just smiled and nodded. Sesshoumaru talked with a short, violently orange garbed youkai, reminiscent of Jaken. Little was actually said but pleasantries – after they were alone again Sesshoumaru pointed out that it wasn't so much what was said as how it was said, and what wasn't even said at all. Kagome nodded, careful to focus, and paid close attention to how the next youkai who wanted to know how Sesshoumaru was doing was responded to.

"Oh! And this must be the Shikon miko Ive heard so much about!" Kagome knew she wasn't going to escape without having to talk to someone...

"That would be me, yes." Kagome smiled, trying not to grin or sound too cold. She didn't know at all how these things worked...

"Did you really defeat Naraku?"

"Yes – I helped. Inuyasha, Miroku, Sango, Kouga...a lot of us worked together."

"So modest!" The youkai woman whose name Kagome hadn't remembered stared at her, and laughed, a tinkling, fake sound of glass. "You should stay in the sun more, Kagome, not hiding in the shadows. Why, we haven't heard of your exploits till now in ages!"

"No?" Kagome wasn't quite sure what to say...

"Yakima, Kagome has still been doing many things even if we have only recently discovered them. I heard she helped you escape, Sesshoumaru..." A taller man intruded. Kagome shook her head slightly, glad to be out of the center of attention.

"Yes – Damia's doing. Bold, to be sure, but she made the mistake of leaving me alive." Sesshoumaru smiled coolly at the newcomer, telling bits and pieces of the story as they continued to move through the castle, meeting and talking and generally proving to one and all that Sesshoumaru was, actually, alive, and that no, she wasn't some random tramp, she was the Shikon miko and not to be painted red with rumor.

"So that's where you've been! Oh, do tell!"

Kagome inwardly shivered. Well, at least the morning had been fun...she couldn't wait to leave. All these powerful people milling about, pressing in...and they all had to be spoken politely to, and told the same story over and over, and it was giving her a headache, particularly when a few of them were so rude...

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An hour or so later, but what felt like much longer, Sesshoumaru finally manged to extract them from the knot of hand waving courtiers, and other various fops. He rather suspected Kagome hadn't been having much fun, but she'd hid it not too badly. And she'd held up pretty well too, even under some of the rapid fire questions she'd been sent. But he didn't want to leave her to the wolves, so to speak, for too long. He could tell she was uncomfortable...

He didn't like this part of his job very much either, truth be known. Idiots bored him. But he knew he had to do it, and unfortunately, this time so did Kagome...

But at least he had manged to escape fairly soon, considering. An hour or two wasn't really a long time to have to send answering the same question over and over. Really. Well, it was, but relatively speaking, it wasn't. And it_ had_ been necessary. People would hopefully begin to talk more about the stories Sesshoumaru and Kagome had told them, rather than the spiteful whispers Damia had planted.

Those whispers wouldn't stop growing – Kagome's presence alone would only make them worse in some ways, and there was no way to undo that, but at least he had tried to do some sort of damage control. Hopefully those who knew him better would see the truth, and support him.

Sesshoumaru led Kagome along behind him, both of them lost in their own thoughts. Occasionally he was forced to stop to talk again, but for the most part, this part of the palace was quieter. Sesshoumaru had a specific garden in mind he was headed to.

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Kagome's head was whirling from the mash of questions from earlier. She'd felt put on the stage, in the spotlight; if this was what being a celebrity in medieval times was like, how the hell did modern stars, who had to deal with paparazzi armed with all the wonders of technology, stand it? It...it was unreal.

Kagome had a newfound respect for Sesshoumaru – no wonder he was like that if that was what a lord had to deal with. She oped that was not what it was like – that was horrible. Some of the people back there...surely they should win some sort of Darwin award? Soon? Please? If there was any justice? Kagome's eyes raked the ceiling of the hallway briefly, but gave up.

Oh well – he had tried to get them out of there as soon as they could reasonably leave. Both of them had already agreed to go and calm the waters as best they could; they_ had_ agreed to go do this, unpleasant though it was. Kagome would be prepared next time, but for now, it was nice to breathe fresh air again...

She looked around at the garden they had come to; this place had so many gardens. Aizu was beautiful in its own way. It was a bit wilder than the other places, former grandeur slowly fallen to soft decay. Sesshoumaru had led her here – he must have a reason.

Kagome smiled slightly, imagining briefly the picnic they had shared long ago. Not so long, really, but in terms of life changing events...it seemed a year away.

She'd gone out pretending to be Amiritsu, and he had been just Joseibi – no one watching, no one snooping, no one to start screaming 'hear ye, hear ye' from the tallest tower if they did something of note. Kagome sighed. She'd never felt...trapped before, but now...

Maybe it was earlier, maybe that was what gave her the idea in the first place, but Kagome grinned and looked at Sesshoumaru, mischief in her eyes.

"Do you ever want to escape?"

"Escape?" Sesshoumaru looked behind him at Kagome, who had been following behind him silently till now. They were almost there by now. Sesshoumaru slowed, and stopped.

"I'm not sure I know what you mean."

"You know – escape. All those people back there...all they wanted was a juicy little tidbit to tell their friends. Kind of horrible in a way, don't you think? If you said the wrong thing, they'd be on you like a pack of sharks."

Sesshoumaru nodded. "That would tend to be an accurate description, yes." Entertaining one, too. He wondered what a few of those people would think of being called a pack of sharks...

"Haven't you ever wished it was different, though?" Kagome sounded wistful, thoughtful.

"I do not think it can be different – that's just the way it is." Sesshoumaru gave her a slight shrug, as if to say, he did not really make the rules – he just lived with them and, occasionally, contributed his own.

"But you could escape, you know." Kagome smiled at him. "We did before."

Sesshoumaru smiled back. "Ah – for moment I could, true enough. But I'd go back, because I had to. If that is what you mean." He thought he knew what she was talking about now – that picnic. And even there the eye had followed them...Mesau had been spying

He wondered briefly what had happened to Mesau – Sorai had taken change of her, and she had been sent to the infirmary. She might have information for them, so for now, alive was more useful than dead. It wasn't likely she could do much in her state anyway, and someone had already verified that alone, she didn't have enough power to seriously harm most of the youkai medical staff, provided they were careful. She should be fine.

Kagome sighed. "I suppose you're right – escape isn't really what I meant, not permanently. I don't always like what I have to do either, but I'll still do it. I just meant..."

"For a moment."

Sesshoumaru turned again, so that he faced her completely.

"Just for a moment."

Kagome smiled, and realized, suddenly, that they were only an arms distance away, She had been that close before. She had been in Sesshoumaru's person bubble more than once, so why was she only now noticing, only now hesitant to reach across?

Her hand twitched, and with an effort, she stilled it, taking care to still as well any stray thoughts in her head of reaching...no.

What had gotten into her? She hadn't been this fixated before on something. She hadn't! Kagome closed here eyes, the better to see thoughts swimming in the dark behind her eyelids. Just for a moment. Yes and no – for long time this had been going on. It was just now that she was _noticing,_just now that she had had time to properly reflect, to realize what was going on.

She opened her eyes, and the moment had passed.

Sesshoumaru was watching her with unreadable eyes, and then, turned away. "Come – I wanted to show you something."

He wondered what she had been thinking – she felt...sad. Sesshoumaru closed his eyes, and left that thought alone. He did not know why she was said but he dared not try to reach out to her, not if he wanted to protect her at all.

He knew what he was doing now, taking her away, alone, was risky enough. Someone was likely watching them even now, in this nest of intrigue. They were still on stage. If enough people got the idea in their heads that they were linked like that...

It could get...interesting.

Sesshoumaru wasn't sure what would happen then, which was why he wanted to avoid the situation altogether if possible. Perhaps he wouldn't be welcome back to Aizu anytime soon – not as a lord, at any rate. Unless there was a very strong case for Kagome being on an equal footing, being an_asset,_ then he'd probably be viewed as far too weak to maintain a lords duties and then Tosa and Satsuma, all the things they wanted to do, would be left high and dry without his support.

He didn't know who else would take control of the west if he didn't. But whoever it was might not want to go along with the South. The north might not decide to go along with them...

Still, so much was up in the air, open to ruin. One wrong step...he didn't know how aware Kagome was of their fragile position, but he most definitely was.

But... he still wanted to show her his favorite garden.

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Kagome smiled in delight as they finally passed through an arch, and a wide garden spread out before them. Sesshoumaru stopped. Tiny bonsai forests camped on the rocks, and water gurgled, twisted, flattened and narrowed into miniature gorges, waterfalls. Beyond this, larger trees draped their leaves over the pool, their branches carefully directed to grow...and somehow coming across as wild, as untouched.

There were no flowers – but the heavy scent of tree, of mountains and mist, pine needles, crept through the air around her. Kagome smiled, and turned to face Sesshoumaru.

"Is this it?" She spoke softly, unwilling to break the stillness. He had wanted to show her something...surely this was it?

"Yes – I thought, as you likely will not be in the council chambers later, this might be a good place for you to come, to meditate."

"Not in the council chambers?" Kagome frowned slightly. "I might not understand, but I would still come...?"

Sesshoumaru shook his head. "There has never been a human allowed in there, ever, that I know of. I mean no offense, but it is highly unlikely you will be let in. Perhaps it is better to come here instead; that was my suggestion."

"Oh." Kagome sighed. Longstanding tradition, was it? Well – she didn't really agree with it, but she could, reluctantly, understand the reasoning. Equally well, she could see that it would be useless to argue.

"I see. It _is _a nice place to meditate. I can see why you like it." Kagome stepped away from Sesshoumaru, venturing out onto the bridge, and pausing, taking things in, letting her mind empty out into the stillness.

Beneath her hands the wood felt old, roughened by weather, and warm. Metallic walkways in the city had never held this sort of heat. The wood of the bridge was alive, in a quiet way, as was the rest of this garden. She could feel the welcome hanging in the air. Kagome straightened, surveying the garden.

It was beautiful – in another time, she could see herself here, spending time with Sesshoumaru, laughing, talking, watching the waterfalls. Perhaps one day she could show him her favorite gardens, the ones not too far from the subway station; if you took the train you could get to it in a half hour. They weren't like these, not as beautiful, not as strange, secluded. There were private spaces, yes, but they were still public gardens. Their value was in the sentiments, the memories. She'd gone there so many times with her family...she could even remember once with her own father, before he'd died.

She hadn't wanted to take Sesshoumaru on the trains, the one time they'd gone out into the city – she hadn't trusted him enough. Now, if they ever went back, she would. There was a butterfly house there – delicate glass greenhouses holding butterflies, protecting them from the elements. Kagome wondered what he'd think of those – if he would like them or not.

"Sesshoumaru?"

"Yes?" He watched her back, as she stood on the bridge – the white material flowing down her back, contrasting with the black of hair, fairly glowed. He knew it wasn't white, wasn't a miko's outfit – he had seen the red and pink Sakura pattern this morning, albeit briefly.

But it still was, on her. A miko's outfit she'd made herself. If they stayed here till twilight, he was sure, she would still shine from under the shadows. It was only mid afternoon, and still, she glowed...

"One day, I should show you one of my favorite gardens."

Kagome turned around and smiled at him. Sesshoumaru watched her, suddenly aware that she was so close...and so very var away, from behind her wall of water. He could easily jump the distance to the bridge. He remembered it had even been a game the first time he'd come here, when he had been very, very small. He'd fallen in eventually, but he had managed. It wasn't so far. But...

She meant so much to him. He'd realized that not so long ago, when he had decided it was worth the price to save her life – he wasn't going to loose her. Not ever. Not if there was anything he could do about it first. Sesshoumaru thought of Tenseiga, safely his once more, left in their shared suite. One did not carry weapons in Aizu often. The thought reassured him.

And yet...he'd saved her, but he was still...scared. If he ever did jump across that bridge – Kagome would run.

She had been in love with his younger once, Sesshoumaru knew. In a way – he had never thought Inuyasha mature enough to actually commit to his side of things, though Kagome was different. With Inuyasha's death he'd thought he'd let his brothers ghost go in peace. There was nothing more to be said between them. But...she had still thought he was Inuyasha, when she...she was close to death. It was probably nothing. She had been hallucinating. He did not hold that against her – she'd been not in her right mind at _all. _But...

Sometimes he wondered – would she ever say his name that way?

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Tanuma sat in his office – or at least, his temporary one – in Aizu, thinking. It was a very bare office – Tanuma didn't keep anything important here, because he didn't really think it would remained private for long. This was not his comfortably booby trapped filing system at home – this was Aizu, and only a fool would trust the palace staff to not pry into whatever they could get their hands on. The information would go to the highest bidder. He'd used the system himself a few times, enough to know how to avoid falling into it.

Ezo had met with them earlier, and luckily, he had been allowed to sit in. Not that it really mattered – Satsuma or Tosa would have told him anything he wished to know of the meeting. But it was always nicer to see things firsthand, see her body language, the expressions. For one versed in such unspoken signs, it was easy to tell what Ezo was thinking.

Well. Easier, at any rate. She really did want to join, support them – but was scared to do so without having more support on their side. If she joined them, she might face enough resistance at home to be overthrown...Until Sesshoumaru was nominated by one member of council, and seconded by another domain...they were at an impasse. Only then would she trust to their strength enough to commit.

In most cases the council was a mere formality – generally domains tended to select their rulers themselves. Like Damia had done, any would be leaders fought for their position, and maintained it. It might be inherited as well, of course – but the council just tended to rubber stamp whoever won.

This was little different...for one thing, there was no precedent. Tanuma sighed and rubbed at his head.

Later, He was going to join Sorai downstairs and try to get some information from Mesau – the sulky miko hadn't really liked helping them, but was resigned to it by now. She had nothing else to fall back on, and she knew well enough the methods the could use to get information if she was uncooperative.

Wisely, she was cooperating without them having to resort to that. Good – he hated doing that anyway.

Tanuma rose, and decided to go collect his mail for the day. This was not trusted to anyone else, and he made sure that the route was as secure as he could make it. Most things were being left till he got back home – only the really important things would arrive for him here.

Tanuma wandered, pretending he was out for nothing more than a stroll in the gardens. And in truth, was partly his reasoning. The gardens were always lovely in Aizu. Tanuma knew the chief gardener here, and he rather suspected the man was the real reason why this was so.

In fact...the head gardener was the man he wanted to see. Arameki was a distant relation – and he had been quite close at one point, having looked after a younger Tanuma for a summer. Tanuma still trusted him, and his sense of honor and loyalty enough that he had asked him to look after his mail.

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"Tanuma! Haven't seen you for a while." Arameki was in his own residence, on the edge of the gardens property. One had to traverse a maze to get there at all. Only a few people, needless to say, knew the way...

"I've been busy – Tosa seems to delight in keeping me buried to the ears in work." Tanuma replied dryly. "You seem well – and the gardens here remain the most beautiful I have ever seen."

"Really? Flatterer...you just want your mail. Don't you?" Arameki grinned, greyed fox ears twitching.

"I'll admit – that would be nice." Games in games in games.

"You should be pleased – there's actually a fair amount today. Aunty wrote in about her kids, and great grandfather whatshisname..." Arameki pulled a thick bundle of the heavier sekishu papers from his haori, and extended them. "I haven't looked, of course - it's _your_ mail - but the addresses were interesting. More work for you to go with whatever Tosa's thought up." Arameki grinned, and then turned around to rummage around in his stack of gardening implements of mass destruction.

"Shoo – I was actually in the middle of something. And I think you might be soon too unless I miss my guess."

Tanuma quickly scanned the envelopes as he left – and his eyebrows rose, surprised. Now_there_ was something he hadn't expected a letter about...

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_First: Yeah, I snitched the portal idea. I really want to get a companion cube for my brother for xmas – just so I can, occasionally, 'borrow' it! Lol. _

_Second:__**Apologies**__ for the fact I put the story on hiatus ( I thought it was better than just not updating...) – school happened to me, and I find it incredibly difficult to try and have any sort of online life going on while doing a full course load at the university...I also had a job at one point, but that didn't work either (was burned out. T__**otally**__...why I refer to 'job' in the past tense) I'm sure most of you've had the same thing happen at some time. Anyway – my last two finals were on the 13__th__ and now I am briefly free. I hope to finish over the break, but if that doesn't happen...I'll be in the art studio printing collagraphs, or doodling or something. Perl maybe. Too hard to focus on this and do that, and in truth, I have actually sorta shifted the attention to things like Not so that I won't finish this, but...yeah. Unlikely to do much more writing afterwards for a while after finishing this. I will try to finish though before break ends! (Big grin) **Thanks for being so understanding!!**  
_

_**Last, and most important:**__ I would like to thank you all, for reading and sticking with me. I've appreciated all the kind words, and all the notes saying you don't mind waiting, or encouraging me to work on school...I may not have replied to all, but I really did appreciate them, and that's what helped me to remember that I __**did**__ need to work on this when I got the chance this week, because there were a few people who wanted to read it. (Sorry Ben – yes, you count, but ...lol. In a Yes / no way?... I don't know :) ) This chapter and another half started one are what I have so far – more to follow soon I hope. (Oddly, I mostly finished the epilogue first...O.o.)_

_**Thank you for all the kind words! **__Hope you've still enjoyed this chapter, and the few left to come. :) Happy holidays to you!_


	43. ch41:Boring

**:: Boring ::**

As soon as he returned from his walk, Tanuma read the letters again. He had a feeling that the short, simple message from Buzen would be important, but there simply wasn't enough information to know, yet. The last thing on his mind before he'd gone to get the mail had been news from Europe.

The traders who'd gone to distant, mystical England in search of the long estranged European youkai had finally come back, after more than a year away – and they sent word that they were a days travel off, and had urgent news for him.

That was very nice to know.

Of course, Tanuma thought sourly, it wouldn't have killed them to say what **sort **of urgent news – he could think of half a dozen ideas of what that might be, and some of those might be rather...detrimental to their position at the moment. He didn't really want a pack of field operatives blundering into the middle of Aizu looking for him.

He forced himself to calm – it was likely nothing he couldn't deal with. He'd mention it to Satsuma and Tosa before dinner. If it turned out that what news he got really _was_ that important, then he'd deal with it then. Until that time...

He had more pressing matters to attend to, like figuring out when, or if, Choshu would arrive this evening, and if Ezo would second Sesshoumaru at the council that would likely take place tomorrow. He had a few more days to cope at least before the traders arrived...

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Kagome sat in the garden. Today, she was here alone. Yesterday had been tiring – Choshu had arrived for dinner, a big, hearty youkai; some sort of boar if she remembered correctly. Or a bore, perhaps, more accurately...he seemed to have only one tone of voice; monotone.

At the least, his arrival a day early had meant that today, she didn't have to put up with the medieval paparazzi as much. Not like yesterday – _that_ had been an experience...one she didn't really have any desire to repeat.

Ah well. Bore or not, his arrival had meant that today the council would meet, and, hopefully, Sesshoumaru would emerge victorious after being rubber stamped and certified fit to rule the West. Again.

She didn't quite understand all the details, nor the subtle political plays and relationships. She suspected that it would take a long time and even so, she wouldn't be able to know everything. It would be too much.

Besides – trying to remember all that would drive her nuts. It was worse than a high school soap opera! So and so hated the other person because of some stupid slight – you couldn't talk about certain things to certain people without offending them...

Urg!

Kagome fidgeted slightly. She never had been that good at meditating when there were a lot of things on her mind, like now. She'd have to get better at that...later. She closed her eyes and leaned back slightly, mind inevitably wandering to Sesshoumaru.

She'd seen him walk into the room this morning – Tosa was going to put him forwards. As long as either Ezo or Choshu decided to second him, it would pass. The council chamber was a big old building in the center of a lake – Kagome had followed along with Tanuma and Sorai, and some of the people who'd come with Ezo and Choshu; when they had left, all with things to do, she had decided to take Sesshoumaru's advice and come here.

She felt a little closer to him here – this was a place he liked to spend time in. She could see why – out of the way, beautiful, peaceful...everything you could wish for to meditate, really. Providing you didn't have a million thoughts careening about in your head, at any rate...

Kagome sighed. They wouldn't be done till things were settled, she'd been told. If the council needed more time than a single day could offer, then they would break for meals, and for the night, resuming again the following morning. She checked her watch – this would be two hours they'd been at it by now.

Gingerly she felt along the bond; in as much as she could tell, Sesshoumaru was still nervous, edgy. She wondered if that was simply normal nerves, or if things weren't going well...

Thinking of him was such a distracting thing- he kept creeping into her thoughts somehow! She silently tried to wish him luck, and tried to calm her mind enough to actually do what she'd come here to do; get some quality meditation time in!

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Sesshoumaru leaned forwards a bit, the better to listen. There were always speeches involved with this. Generally, long and convoluted ones. But still, it behooved him to pay attention, lest the details escape to bite him in the rear later on.

Tosa had the stand, so to speak – with less than ten people in the chamber, no one had ever bothered to have any sort of podium installed. He was currently just finishing putting Sesshoumaru's name forwards as a 'candidate.' When he put his mind to it, he was actually not bad at speaking, Sesshoumaru thought. Then again, Tosa had the charisma for it.

Sesshoumaru could remember once, long ago now it seemed, when he had come here before, seeking to become lord. He'd inherited the west form his father, of course, but in the first year of rule he'd had to prove he had earned the privilege of rule – every time he'd turned around, someone else was plotting. He had spent a summer grimly quashing all attempts by others to take what he viewed as his; as the first winter snows blew, he had come to Aizu, having managed to survive that spring and summer and remain lord. The council met yearly just before winter, and that year he had gone to be acknowledged as the true ruler of the west. Thereafter, he had generally gone to the once yearly meetings, though for the most part, there was little point. All those seemed to be were occasions for arguing over borders for the most part. Sometimes they got things done, like now - but usually not.

That, and he remembered fondly the one time there had been an assassin-ninja waiting for him to fall asleep, just before the neutrality of Aizu was instated; _that _had been an unwelcome surprise in the middle of the night!

Sesshoumaru thought back again to his first meeting. The council then had been much the same – Tosa hadn't been married at that point, but he had been newly appointed lord as well the previous year. Choshu had been in power, and another youkai, Nara of the north. Ezo was her daughter: she was still the youngest council member. Perhaps that was why her rule was not as strong – she was still fairly young as youkai reckoned things, far closer to 16 in terms of human years.

"...and I invite anyone else who wishes to voice their thoughts to speak up, and tell us." Tosa nodded to everyone in the room, and then leaned back slightly in his seat. Shu, who was acting as chairman, gestured.

Sesshoumaru tensed. Now was the moment...

If he was not permitted to rule, he would simply go back to the west, and try again. They would have to accept him eventually. But by that time...

A long silence stretched – Choshu would not meet his eyes. But then...

"I second. Sesshoumaru ruled well; He should do so again" Ezo smiled, a thin line of against white skin. Pale blue eyes, near silver, nodded at Sesshoumaru.

A small sigh of relief escaped his lips; Sesshoumaru smiled slightly. "Thank you, Ezo. I hope to prove your confidence in my rule worthwhile."

Now; to business. Sesshoumaru made the obligatory short speech about being happy to be a lord again, and then jumped straight into the business of the council.

"Tosa generously called this council at my request. After Damia attempted to take over my position, I had ample opportunity to think on the problem. And the human invasion _is_ a problem, one that will only continue to grow – I think we can all agree on that?"

The rest of the council nodded slowly, some with varying degrees of commitment. All of them knew about _that_ problem, and the plethora of other issues it had spawned along the way...those were actually more of a problem in the North than the newcomers at the moment.

"Damia's idea will not work, nor will the Purists. The Shikon miko...she is able at times to see what the future holds. I was able to see a small part of that future as well, and there are far too many humans in it for Damia's idea, or the Purists idea, to work." He was slightly distorting the truth here, Sesshoumaru admitted – but not by a whole lot. This was an easy way to understand things, without mentioning the whole convoluted idea of time travel. Besides, that was Kagome's secret, not his, to share if and when she chose to.

"If we kill one, a dozen more will spring up in that humans place. They bring strange weapons with them, and invent more. _We_ can fight, perhaps, but our lower cousins will not be able to. And eventually, I know; we will not be able to fight." Sesshoumaru didn't look terribly happy as he spoke these words – he did not like admitting to any weakness, but the entire purpose of this was to get here, to make people see that they had to do something, had to act together, make a sound decision. He did not know what that decision might be yet, but they had to at least admit there was a problem. That was the first step.

Ezo and Choshu did not look happy either – Tosa and Satsuma already knew, but even so, looked a little glum.

Sesshoumaru nodded towards Tosa. "I think some of the points you, and the fellowship make are valid – we might be able to benefit from interaction, or trade." " He continued, louder, over the sudden protest from Choshu.

"The part I find hard to agree with is that is not something most youkai will consent to. Trade is good, but ...most of us, I think, won't do it. I don't know if I would either. The South is more used to humans, but even there, there are those who do not agree. That isn't a solution that will work for most of us."

Choshu nodded, and fell silent again. Sesshoumaru wondered if he had thought Sesshoumaru had gone wholesale to the fellowship for a moment, there. He hadn't of course; he still thought some of them were morons – he was simply pointing out that in certain circumstances, it was a good place to start.

"True enough – I'm not about to label myself as a fellowship supporter, but I do think we have a lot more to do with humans in general than you." Tosa nodded at the rest of the room. South was where most of the contact with the newcomers had been, and before that, it had been a center of trade with the continent for years. They viewed things a little differently there.

"I do not think the Europeans recognize youkai in any case, if what you have said is true?" Sesshoumaru wanted to make sure that everyone knew that part...it was easier to fight them in some ways, harder in others if someone thought you were a myth...

"No – they do not. They think our people make up stories of youkai – and since most of the Europeans who see youkai don't tend to survive to spread stories after, they've got no reason to believe. When _we_ trade, the kitsune are the negotiators. They pretend to be human, and the Europeans are none the wiser for it." Tosa smiled widely. "It always makes me laugh – but it proves a few things. They aren't afraid of us, if they think we don't even exist. And they'll likely keep coming."

Ezo frowned. "I haven't had nearly as much experience with the newcomers – are they really as bad as that?"

"We can take you on a tour of the market one day, Lady Ezo. They are not really that bad in small numbers – but they do keep coming. You'd think they never heard of youkai before!"

Choshu frowned "Look, even in small numbers they can be dangerous, if not to us, then to the humans of Japan. I don't particularly care what happens to them, but I hesitate to allow more humans in, even in small numbers. Particularly if they have weapons the like of which you claim."

Sesshoumaru sighed. To his mind, now, it wasn't a question of 'allow' anymore...it was knowing that they didn't care about 'allow' and to deal with them on that basis. Sooner or later the rest of the world would be here, and youkai had to find a good way to deal with them now, before they were in such a bad position that they were reduced to shadows, or wiped out, something equally unpleasant. He remembered uneasily the thought of Tokyo – filled with people, and not a one of them youkai. Even a kitsune in disguise left some traces visible to anther youkai, usually. But Tokyo...

Not a single youkai but him had been there.

Well – he knew that – Ezo and Choshu didn't. Shu didn't really care either way. Even Tosa and Satsuma did not have that bleak vision in mind, though they probably had a slightly clearer idea of the problem than the other two did.

Sesshoumaru settled down for a long, long meeting's worth of arguing. Somehow, he had to convince them that they had to do something...that was the first step. Once there, then hopefully, they could work together and find a solution...

The hopeful feeling he'd gotten as soon as Ezo had seconded began to fade away in light of the arguing that was only just beginning...

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Kagome opened her eyes. This was still not working. She wasn't going to get anything done soon anyway, so she finally gave up on trying to meditate, and sat there, thinking.

She hoped it was going well for Sesshoumaru – the council would break for lunch, but they'd keep going after that probably, from what dim flickers of feeling she could get through the bond. She left them alone as much as she could – the last thing Sesshoumaru needed was distractions...

Kagome shook her head, and thought back to yesterday, to the quick little walk in the gardens, stolen moments. That had been so nice of him, to show her one of his favorite places, to make sure she had something to do while he was locked away in the council. Well, in as much as he could provide 'things to do' for her; she was an adult after all, and able to amuse herself. It was just...thoughtful, that was the word she was looking for.

Kagome got up from her rocky, mossy seat, and headed to the bridge, picturing him standing on the bank across from her, just as he had been yesterday. It was only a few steps to where he had been – not very far away. She half wished he'd come to stand with her then...the other half wished she had gone to stand with him.

Kagome groaned. Now, if that wasn't some sort of mental rebellion, she didn't know what was. She did not need this right now! No more thoughts of what ifs! He was a nice guy...more than nice...but right now...?

Ooooh... She'd picked practically the worst time to subconsciously decide he was more than nice, more than a simple friend...not that he'd ever been just a simple friend really, it had always been complicated, just never in _that_ way...

Half the reason they were in Aizu was to prove that there was absolutely no romantic attraction between them, that she wasn't the woman of rumor...

Arg!

Even if he somehow, amazingly, didn't run in the opposite direction if he ever found out...(she was going to make sure he didn't find out!) there wasn't going to be any way to make things work. He'd probably get tossed out of the council on his ass if they found out, the way she understood things to be...

And besides – he probably_ would_ run very fast in the other direction anyway. He wasn't overtly fond of humans in general, though she was an exception, apparently. That was probably the _last_ thing he wanted to have to deal with right now...a plain little miko making eyes at him...

She'd seen yesterday some of the glances he'd gotten from the younger female youkai population in Aizu – he probably could pick any number of them over her, anyway. Some of them...they would have put the models in magazines to shame, easily. Youkai were always beautiful, always bright, always just a little out of reach. It had been a bit of a struggle not to say anything, yesterday, or to let her face show what she was thinking...thankfully he hadn't seemed to pick up on it, or simply put it down to her being uncomfortable in general.

Kagome shook her head. She'd already decided she couldn't let him find out, couldn't jeopardize where they stood. She couldn't even share the fact that she had been saved from death by a bond – if that were found out, it would probably work against them just as much as if her own feelings were laid bare.

She hadn't really any right to think of him in that way. She wouldn't have – except that the rules of attraction seemed to have no common sense. And he probably had some other youkai he liked for all she knew. _Why _was she still worrying over this...?

Probably just the way humans were built. The way the mind worked, people worried over what they couldn't control. But somehow, she had to put him from her mind...

Hadn't she said that yesterday? Kagome closed her eyes, feeling very alone. She _had _said that – obviously it hadn't worked. She had to try harder...put temptation from her mind...

Unfortunately, deep down, she didn't really _want_ to put Sesshoumaru out of mind...

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Sorai wandered around the gardens, not in any particular rush. Things were at a standstill – it was all going to be wheeling and dealing from here on out. Fun, but she wasn't going to be directly involved. This was all up to the lords, now. They had to hash things out between them. Her part would come after, once she knew enough to start plotting, finding out what would help them, who had the cards...

Tanuma had, of course, brought a stack of paperwork to deal with. Sorai hadn't brought nearly as much, because, technically, she hadn't been in charge of counter intelligence at the time she'd left the West. She had a feeling that would change by tonight, once the new ruler was announced. Sesshoumaru had indicated she would be given her job back, and he was likely to be the ruler. That was good of him – Sorai was glad that Sesshoumaru appreciated loyalty. He always had...that was part of why she followed his banner. Harsh, but fair. The kind of lord who didn't ask you to do things he wouldn't do himself, if he could.

She was a little out of touch with Aizu, though – so that was a better thing to reacquaint herself with, rather than paperwork, as Sorai saw things. All the important things were happening here, in Aizu. She had spent the early morning walking through the city, regaining her bearings and talking to a few select people. Barring wholesale invasion, she would probably survive without too much news from outside of Aizu for the next little bit. Besides, if she wanted to, she could always go back to asking Mesau about a few things...

As Sorai rounded the corner, she paused. Someone else was here...

Ah – Kagome. The Shikon miko. Sorai hadn't really had a chance to spend much time with her, but she seemed to be trusted by Sesshoumaru, and the south. From all accounts she had heard over the years, Kagome was a dependable miko.

A strange one, though. Sorai had never figured out where Kagome had actually come from, nor where she disappeared to. It was like she stepped into another world entirely, leaving no trace behind...

"Greetings."

"Oh! Sorai." Kagome got up and bowed respectfully. "Good to see you!"

Sorai smiled, though inside, she remained puzzled. That was the other thing; Kagome always spoke just a little...differently. Most people thought she was from the continent when they heard her talking, but Sorai was from there herself – that accent was from somewhere else.

Now – if she knew _where_...

She put it aside, and left it for later. It would be rude to ask – and besides, a little mystery like this would keep her mind pleasantly occupied until such time as she had actual work to do.

"Keeping busy?"

"A little – I'm kinda anxious to see how things turn out though." Kagome sat back down, and Sorai made herself at home on another seat close by.

"I believe things will work out – if they don't accept him, there really aren't any other candidates. Damia was fairly thorough in that respect. He'd go back to the West, and once there, I'm pretty sure that he'd be ruler again. Aizu doesn't have the authority to say how each domains internal affairs are handled. They just nod and make the appropriate noises of approval."

"I know – I've never been involved with anything like this before, so I'm still a little nervous." Kagome smiled at Sorai. "Sorry."

"Don't be – this likely is quite new to you." Sorai smiled slightly.

"I'll say – I hadn't any idea of how things worked before this. Seems very strange." Kagome smiled, and sat back a bit. "I wonder – when will things begin to happen again?"

Sorai shook her head. If nothing else, Kagome was a breath of fresh air – she didn't try to mask her thoughts. "Tonight we will know for sure who the new lord is. Unless there's someone else hiding in the chamber, Sesshoumaru will have gotten it. After that..."

"...You don't know. He was going to try and get everyone to at least agree to the fact that they have a problem, I think..."

"And that will take quite a while – most of the lords are pretty stubborn. At dinner – that is when things will be announced. I shall probably see you then." Sorai stood up, and nodded. "It was nice to talk with you."

Kagome nodded, and smiled, and watched as Sorai wandered down the path again out of sight. Back to doing nothing again...

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By the time dinner rolled around, Kagome was on pins and needles. Dinner was to be an Event. Someone had come to get her from the garden, and had explained things to her. Kagome aimlessly wandered through the vast crowds of youkai, feeling lost. She at least knew where she was sitting. It was off to a side, and as far as she knew, no one else was with her. Sesshoumaru...he was at the head table, along with the other heads of state. All this formality was sort of depressing.

Kagome tried her best to socialize when expected to, but it was a relief to finally sit down. Luckily, she discovered, she was across from Sorai...who hopefully would keep her from making any grosser social missteps...

The evening became a blur – The only part she really remembered, for some reason, aside from the relief when Sesshoumaru was announced as 'Lord', was when another youkai not too far away had one too many drinks and stuck an elbow in the pudding.

After, that was what she remembered best, when the mandatory banquet wound to a close around midnight, and she was allowed to return to the set of rooms she and Sesshoumaru were sharing.

"Kagome?" Sesshoumaru arrived back in the rooms not too long after she had, not even half an hour later.

Kagome turned around to face him, twisting from where she had been sitting by the window. "Yes?"

Sesshoumaru watched her. She hadn't lit any lamp; the last light of the sun lingered enough to see by yet. "I hope you were alright today?"

It wasn't exactly what he wanted to say; in an ideal world, it would have been something about eyes, and beautiful. But that wasn't a good idea. In fact, it was a really, really stupid one, probably...

"Yes – I went to the gardens to sit. It was okay." Sesshoumaru read what she didn't day – it hadn't been the funnest afternoon she'd ever spent. But there was little he could do about it, unfortunately.

"That's good. Council...went as expected, really. They still haven't all quite admitted that there is a problem, much less how to fix it...I think part of the problem is that we haven't got a solution. If you don't have a solution, then I suppose not admitting there is a problem at all will fix it..." Sesshoumaru sighed, and sat down not too far from Kagome. "Stubborn."

"Too bad." Kagome sat besides him, enjoying the quiet between the two of them. She felt no need to fill the silence with words.

Slowly, the sun set, and she made no move to light the lamps. Neither did Sesshoumaru. They just sat side by side, few words passed between them. There is a kind of silence that does not need words, that words will kill.

But even silence ends; as the wind came up, Kagome began to shiver. She made no move to move, unwilling to break the silence.

A tail slowly wrapped itself around her, and Sesshoumaru gave her a small smile. "You seem cold."

"...a little." Kagome smiled, and settled into the warmth, glad of more than the heat. "What time do you have to go to the arguing session tomorrow?"

"Not too long after daylight, really. Breakfast will be earlier and not quite as long..." Sesshoumaru shook his head. "One can but hope..."

"Yeah..." Kagome snuggled further into the warm white fur, warmth and sleep overtaking her.

Eventually, silence reigned once more, quieting into even breathing.

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In other parts of Japan, however, silence was the last thing on anyones mind. A group of kitsune jogged along, trading jokes back and forth. The leader began making bets; if they reached Aizu before moonrise, he'd buy them all sake...

"You're on!" One kitsune raced ahead of the others, paws slapping the stone pavement of the road, deftly jumping over the uneven stones and avoiding the outstretched shadows of the statues lining the road. If there were statues by the road, they were almost to Aizu...

The whole lot of them were excited to be home – nearly two years was a long time - and a far longer time to spend mostly in the company of humans, with no contact from anyone else at all. Truly, deep undercover... It had been rather a disappointment to realize that they had missed Tanuma by only a mere _day_; He had gone with Tosa and Satsuma to Aizu city, they had been told.

What was funnier was that the information they had might actually help him at Aizu. Not to be to be deterred from their goal, the gang of shapeshifters had set out for Aizu themselves. Compared to the distant realms of England, Holland and France, a few days worth of travel on foot was nothing. And to be so close to the end...their spirits were high.

That had nothing to do with the promise of sake, of course.

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_A little shorter. Skipped writing speeches. Hate doing speeches...Which reminds me; I have to write a speech about getting a blackbelt (insert unhappy smilie of choice here) I like that part of the testing the least...silly public speaking. Ahem. Anyway._

_Heh – you know, next chapter will make the magical number 42...(duhn duhn duh) _

_Thanks! Guess some of you haven't given up on me totally. :) Tried to get this chapter out as soon as I could after the last one. (It helped that yesterday afternoon I was stuck with no Internet or other distractions and only story to work on for several hours. Forgot all my other jpg files I was supposed to do things to. XD) Finally starting to get back into the hang of writing – hopefully the fact I haven't touched this thing in a few months doesn't show __**too**__ badly in the quality of what's in the chapters... and I hope, unlike the chapter title, it isn't too full of boringness. Oh well...next chapter things really get moving!_

_Thanks, everyone:)_


	44. ch42:Far away, the same

**:: Far away, the same ::**

Tanuma jumped slightly as someone began hammering on his door in the middle of the night. Muttering dark imprecation about the manners, and probable breeding of whatever unfortunate soul had decided to wake him up, he answered.

"What is it?" Tanuma barely managed to remain civil – he liked his sleep...

"Sir! You wished to be informed if a party of several kitsune asking for you turned up!" The servant bowed deeply to him. "Apologies for disturbing you, but they have only just arrived and are waiting downstairs."

Tanuma nearly groaned. He'd hoped to have another day of council at least before_ that_ lot of field headaches descended. Some of them were, as he recalled, a bit on the rowdy side too...Apparently, being allowed time to cope was not to be the case...

"I see – give me a moment and I'll be right there." By now, he'd slightly forgiven the poor servant. A gang of roving kitsune...he _had_ specifically requested that if they showed up, he was to be informed immediately, no matter what time it was. This was important enough to lose sleep over. First, he didn't need them blundering into the middle of things, second, they had indicated they had urgent information...usually, his subordinates were smart enough to only toss things like that around if they actually meant it. Tanuma tended to get irritated with people who said their report was urgent, and then it turned out not to be anything at all.

Tanuma rushed around his room, and grabbed the paper they'd sent him yesterday. It had only arrived a day before them, even by express post, so perhaps the speed was indication they were serious – by now, Tanuma was very, very curious. It was enough to spur him on...

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As he was led through the maze of castle corridors, Tanuma reread the letter. Urgent news...and little information besides that.

At last he arrived in front of the door. The servant was dismissed, and Tanuma made a cursory glance of the room door. It seemed to be secure enough. At least, as much as he'd get in Aizu.

He opened the door on only lightly controlled chaos – the party of agents appeared to have somehow, somewhere, gotten their paws on a quantity of sake. A small celebration was in progress...

Tanuma understood, a bit. They'd been away for much longer than he had expected. Originally a few years ago, he had sent them to discover the lay of the land in Europe. It wasn't really a spying thing; he had just wanted to know a lot more about Europe, and it had made sense to send this group, because they were good at blending in.

That had been their primary directive – to figure out how the European humans thought, and acted, and learn as much as they could of where all these new humans came from, what made them tick. All the maps of Europe they had had at the time were old, _older_ than old. They showed things like the ancient European youkai cities, and things of that sort. Things must surely have changed in the past years – only an idiot would think otherwise.

In his grandfathers youth had been the last time there had been contact with Europe – thousands of years ago, just before the collapse of the Japanese youkai Emperor. They needed to find out what it was like now. The team had also been supposed to find any of the old European youkai empire, if it existed...the fact that the newcomer humans didn't even think youkai existed spoke strongly against survivors, and he'd never held out much hope for that. However...

"Tou – report. What did you find?"

Tou, the leader, bowed, and the rest of his team followed him as soon as they became aware of Tanuma's presence. "Yes, Sir." Tou cleared his throat, and launched into an explanation.

"We spent a few months of travel to get to Europe, as requested. It took about that long to become fluent in English and Dutch, in any case, even with what we've learned from the traders here. Some of us learned other languages, too. Once there, we spent some time discovering how the humans there operate. It is...quite unlike here. They have rather a different world view than we do – I have with me some of the most important notes we made, most are back in Buzen in your office, for later. There are quite extensive accounts on the humans of Europe."

"And? This does not seem urgent..." There had to be something more – if there wasn't, he'd be quite upset at being hauled out of bed and worrying over nothing. A stack of notes on the habits of the average European human was interesting, but hardly earth shattering.

"I'm getting there. Before leaving to go to Europe, you were of the belief, as were we, that the Europeans have no youkai, or that the old empire there must have collapsed somehow. Based on the humans disbelief, we were to try and find any remaining youkai if possible, and find out all we could from them."

Tou smiled widely. "We found them...and we found the Empire. It's still going strong. Oberono even received us officially at one point, and we were able to exchange greetings. He sent us a letter, to be delivered to the council."

Tanuma sat back, slightly stunned.

Oberono. Emperor of Europe. So it **did** exist...

That had just made this whole thing worthwhile. How could the European empire still exist, after all he'd heard from the humans...? It seemed impossible...the Europeans didn't even know what youkai _were_...!

"I know it seems strange. But it's true. They did something I've never even heard of...the miko over there – I think the humans call them witches or wizards or something? Anyway, about a thousand years after we lost contact with them, they began to experiment, to work with the humans there, to explore ways of combining youki and a miko's power, or a priests."

"_Wizard_ – they have different names. You were there, you should know!" was interjected form the side merrily.

"... Or wizard, rather. At the time, the humans were in a bit of a state – something to do with romans. The youkai, and the humans who worked with them, began to open...gateways, they called them. Domen."

"Dolmen. Dolllmen. You never did get the hang of pronouncing L's, did you?" Someone else called out cheekily.

Tou not-so-silently fumed. "Alright! So I never learned the bloody English language properly. Stop harping!"

"Gateways?" Tanuma raised an eyebrow. Humans and youkai working together...an interesting idea...he doubted many would be able to work together. Most of the time miko seemed to try and get rid of youkai, and there was no love lost on the youkai's part.

The only ones he could think of offhand were Kagome and Sesshoumaru...and _they_ were the only ones he could think of at all! Mesau perhaps, but she no longer really counted...and in any case, she'd always been a miserable, uncooperative old bag. No help from her!

"Yes – gateways. I'm not sure how they work, myself, but they do. Most of the European empire moved to behind the gateways. Very few of the humans, only ones with miko power, can get to them at all, and since the Empire controls the gateways, they don't tend to bother with the human world much anymore...they just shut it out if they feel like it, leaving a few places for their own travel. They do have more of an inclusive attitude to humans, but...only the ones who tend to deal with them, like miko. Er, wizards, I guess they call them."

"Well. That explains a lot about why..." Tanuma blinked. "A whole other _world_...?"

"As far as we can tell, yes. Some of the youkai – I think they call them erus over there?"

"Elves! Ellllves! Or you could even call them the aes sidhe, too, if you want to be proper about it!" Another kitsune called helpfully.

"-Aes sidhe...do live on this side, but those are mostly those who don't mind the humans as much, or who can blend in. Like us kitsune. There's a few towns and villages of youkai there on this side of the gates. They go back and forth as they like, for the most part. They have teams working on the gates who check at certain times of day for mail, and supplies, travelers – that's how we went across. There's a whole complicated system of times and open gates. It's pretty...odd. They think in a far different way. But it does work."

Tanuma shook his head. "Amazing..." He was still blown away. The Empire existed...and they had found a way to coexist with humans quite well, as far as he saw it. Which was more than Japan was managing, at the moment. There was much to be learned...maybe here, there was a solution for them as well. He hoped, with all his heart, that it was so...

"Thank you. You have...done better than I had ever hoped."

"I've got some more papers – there. They're a little more detailed."

"I see..." Tanuma eyed the stack of papers teetering on the table warily. "I'll take those with me to look over – I think for now, you're due a bit of time to recuperate." Urgent, urgent news indeed! He had to get this off straight away to Tosa. The council too, tomorrow. Maybe that would help their case!

"Yep – we already started recouping!" Tou glared at the talkative subordinate. Tanuma merely chuckled.

"I'll ask you to stay for now – this will go to council tomorrow, and you may be asked to give a summary of what you've found. Please don't share the information- but I'm guessing you already knew that."

"Of course." Tou bowed. "Is there anything else?"

"No – I'll have the kitchens send something, though. I'm sure they wouldn't mind, and you've _more_ than earned it."

"Goodbye! Say thanks to whoever brought all the fish earlier, too!" One of the agents called over his shoulder, gesturing at the plate of sushi snacks on the table, mouth half full.

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Tanuma closed the door carefully behind him, after having directed the staff of Aizu to make the party at home. More sake and sushi were on the way: soon it would be a party in truth. A well deserved one, though.

Tanuma's mind was already spinning with possibilities...but it would probably be best, he thought, if he went directly to Tosa and Satsuma, and they poured over the thick wad of notes together first. News like this...!

He wondered if this as the solution they had been searching for, or at least part of it. If those who didn't want to deal with humans went beyond the gate, things might improve. He knew the humans wouldn't go away, rather the opposite – but the youkai could. It wasn't like they were admitting defeat, and were leaving the lands they had been born in, though perhaps some would see it that way. They were going to explore new lands, go to places they couldn't be reached...

Feeling happily bureaucratic (though not Vogonesque) Tanuma continued on his way, already itching to read through the stack of papers and find out more about their long lost cousins in Europe, and the gates. He wouldn't get through all the papers, he knew, but...

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Tosa was equally unpleased to be awoken in the middle of the night – but by the time Tanuma had finished explaining why he'd woken him up, Tosa was wide awake.

Satsuma took the stack of papers from Tanuma, eyes scanning them "I wonder...I wonder if some of the more extreme youkai might want to go there. They wouldn't have to deal with humans at all then, except for the actual gateway...and even then..."

"Yes – but I know I'd never want to leave my home. And I don't mind the humans. They amuse me." Tosa shook his head.

"Well, yes, but..."

Heads pressed together, they argued for a time, reading through and finding bits of information along the way. It was not for some time that Tosa frowned.

"You know – for this to work, you definitely need to have a miko, I think. Maybe someone should go poke Sesshoumaru and Kagome awake, see what they think of all this..." Tosa grinned evilly. "I'll even volunteer!"

Satsuma sighed. "Tosa..."

"Oh, let him have his fun." Tanuma sighed. "I'll hear nothing else if you don't, you know."

"Very well." True enough – Tosa had been unhappy enough about the prospect of a long, long meeting tomorrow. And the day after, and the day after that...A little fun wouldn't hurt him. Satsuma nodded.

Tosa grinned, mock saluted them and wandered off through the palace, leaving Tanuma and Satsuma happily wrangling over some obscure detail.

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Tosa crept through the darkened corridors, feet noiseless. He'd had a lot of practice at sneaking around after hours throughout his life. First, to visit the kitchens. Then, later on in life, to visit Satsuma...now he mostly just visited kitchens again. Hurray midnight snacks...

Ah – there was the door. Tosa didn't bother knocking; he had something better in mind...

"_**Surprise**_!" Tosa eyed the very sleepy looking miko and Sesshoumaru, sitting together in the center of the room. Kagome had apparently jumped, and fallen over, still wrapped up in tail. Sesshoumaru had probably half jumped to his feet before falling over, evidently having forgotten that he'd lent his tail to Kagome, for who knew what reason...

Tosa grinned. Sesshoumaru had never let himself get_ that _close to someone else before, certainly not for long periods of time like that. This was...interesting, to say the least. Hmmmm...

"Oh, I'm _sorry_..."

"No. No you're not." Kagome groaned, neck craned to see who it was. "Tosa? What the hell are you doing here at this hour...?"

Tosa watched as something beeped, and glowed in Kagome's hands. Miko powers at work, he assumed.

"...its 3 in the morning...that's not funny at all..."

"I second the idea." Sesshoumaru had picked himself up off the floor, and was clearly nowhere near as entertained by the intrusion as Tosa was.

"Oh, but it _is_amusing. For me at any rate."

"...yeah right..." Kagome groaned again. Too early...and she did rather resent the way he'd barged in. What if she slept in the nude? She didn't, of course, but that was quite beside the point...

"And I did have a reason to come visit you. I've got some information for tomorrow that'll make you very, _very _happy." Tosa's grin was wide.

"Then start explaining. Or else." Sesshoumaru liked Tosa well enough – but not in the middle of the night, woken from a sound sleep. This had better be good, or he was going to be one very unhappy Taiyoukai.

"Tanuma got information back from Europe – he figured out what happened to the youkai empire over there, it's still around, and how they have gateways, and Oberono sent a letter, but we haven't opened it yet..."

" Oberono?" Kagome looked at Tosa strangely. That name sounded familiar, actually... "Related to Oberon, perchance?"

"Oh, yes, sorry, that_is_ him. Oberon. Tanuma can't pronounce English things to save his life, nor can Tou. Oberon! And I can't remember the empress off the top of my head, but he has one!" Tosa informed her happily.

"...Titania?" Kagome couldn't believe what she was hearing. Was this some bad, bad dream about English class gone wrong?

"Yes! That's it – hey, wait a minute, how did you know that?" Tosa looked at her, eyes wide.

"I guessed." Kagome shook her head. Gateways...what was he saying about gateways? And what on earth did English stories of the king and queen of the bloody fairies have to do with anything...?

That's it – _no_ more falling asleep next to a stack of Shakespeare books...

"If we look closely at this gateway thing...its not going to disappear in a poof of logic, is it?" Kagome fixed one beady eye on Tosa.

"Ah...no...?" Tosa looked sightly confused.

Sesshoumaru shook his head. Anyone foolish enough to try and make sense of what Kagome said when she wasn't fully awake deserved the gibberish they got. He remembered the one time she'd kept insisting there was a house filled with a never ending party...He didn't smile, but mentally filed away the comment fondly to ask about later.

"Okay then. Lets go – and start explaining a little more clearly" Kagome shook her head. Something important was afoot, but the message was so garbled she hadn't really understood too much of it. The fact she was still not totally awake wasn't helping either.

Tosa followed Sesshoumaru and Kagome out of the room, and began to relate the nights events to date in more of a cohesive manner. For once, he was being serious.

By the time they had managed to travel the near deserted corridors to Tosa and Satsuma's chambers, Kagome and Sesshoumaru had been filled in on everything Tosa knew so far, and were eager to read the long summary of reports. Kagome in particular was eager to see the (as yet unopened letter) from Oberon...She wasn't quite sure how _that _part worked yet, but maybe Europe had a little different view of youkai. Maybe the youkai of Japan were related to elves? Or maybe thats just what Europe called youkai...by any there name...

She wondered what else might live in other parts of the world, if things like this were related somehow, r if it was coincidence that more than one places myths had some grain of truth to them. Maybe there was even a tribe of Bigfeet, or Bigfoots, or something, living in North America...

If nothing else, it was definitely interesting._ 'May you live in interesting times...'_ Curse, indeed, Kagome thought. Things had been nothing_ but_ interesting...starting with getting yanked into a well by mistress centipede, and going from there.

The mishmash group started at 3 am with the stack of papers, which was divided amongst them for a little easier reading – and then that became, somehow, 4 and then 5 am, respectively, reading interspersed with arguing and talking, debate over certain technical points on the gateways themselves, and how he Empire functioned. Tanuma had gone to grab Sorai at some point, and between the lot of them they began to figure out exactly what sort of things a gateway did – and what they might be able to present to the rest of the council tomorrow. Or, technically, later that day...

Eventually, the discussion was called to a halt, if for no other reason than breakfast.

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Kagome poured over the papers at breakfast, half paying attention to the paper, a bit of attention to what her chopsticks were doing, and some on what Tosa was saying.

"...so if we get to that point, Kagome might get to come in and help explain..."

...Wait, someone had said her name. "Huh?"

Tosa sighed. "Kagome, please pay attention. You're not going to get much more out of that now, there's no time."

"...Sorry. You were saying?" Kagome deliberately put down the paper, and leaned forwards.

"I was saying that the first thing Sesshoumaru and I are going o do is bring this to the attention of the council. Tou is probably going to come in. Tanuma told me that apart from a hangover, he's perfectly willing to come and speak at length on their trip, and answerer any questions. But you...we want you to come too. Just might take more maneuvering."

"Why?" Kagome mentally smacked herself. Dumb question.

"Because as far as I know, there's never been a human, or even a miko, in the council to ask questions of. Some people put a great deal of stock in precedence." Tanuma replied, folding his arms. "Ezo is a bit more likely to bend than Choshu, she's much younger, but not by much. The farther north you get, the more traditional people are..."

"Not quite true, Tanuma. I know some rather liberal northerners" Sorai laughed lightly. "But on the whole, yes. And Choshu can have an unfortunate tendency to be an idiot sometimes."

Kagome sighed. She'd known that already. Oh well. She hurried through her own food, and watched as Sesshoumaru and the rest did the same, preparing for the council later that day.

Outside the small dining room, the castle was abuzz with activity. Kagome wondered if they knew what sort of a news bomb was going to be dropped, or if it was normally that busy.

Sesshoumaru, and the rest, disappeared into the council chamber again, but this time she and this Tou person were directed to wait outside the antechamber. The morning felt long – Kagome spent most of it alternating between reading, attempting to question Tou in the antechamber (He wasn't having any of that, and she gave up soon) and pacing. Waiting was such work...

Kagome had never been much good at public speaking, ever, and she had absolutely no idea of what to expect next. Would people be angry, or would they take her seriously; what were they going to ask about? She started biting her nails after Tou went in to talk, and she was left alone to fret. She hoped Sesshoumaru was holding up...

Suppose...she didn't know the answers? Kagome knew, deep down, that she wasn't really the miko they all thought she was. She tended to fly by the seat of her pants and had been lucky so far – it had worked.

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On the other side of the antechamber door, it was slightly chaotic. Tosa had kicked off the council by announcing that had a letter to open. From the European youkai.

That has started an instantaneous argument over the fact that the European youkai surely couldn't still be around, which had been finally solved by opening the letter once the voices were quieter. It wasn't much; a very simple, formal invitation to visit Oberon and Titania whenever they had a wish to, the obligatory fancy wording that meant hello, and the wish for a future good relationship – by which he meant trade, likely. Historically speaking, they had always been on good terms with the European empire. There was also a mention that he was sending his own party to visit them at some future point, with gifts.

Apparently Tou had left in a hurry, wanting to get the information home, and had needed to travel light – the mandatory gifts of state had been left behind, and he hadn't wanted to truck them through a mass of humans to get them home anyway. That was another thing to deal with at some point – sending their own gifts out the Europe, now they actually knew there_was_ an Empire out there...

Once the letter was dealt with, Tosa called in Tou – who explained how gates worked, and a few other details. Once he'd gone, things had been even more argumentative – Choshu thought having to rely on human miko to help with the gate, or a priest, was balderdash. Even if they could solve the 'fellowship problem' by shoving them all through a gate and locking it...

Sesshoumaru was not having fun – his and Tosa's 'solution' was not going to be used to lock away the current headaches and throw away the keys. That wouldn't solve anything...! Besides, Choshu only thought the fellowship were a problem, not the purists...idiot...

"Look, Choshu. You can't do that – as soon as you get rid of those problems, more will pop up to replace them."

"I don't think that ..."

"I think that. Why don't you admit the root problem and solve that – that'll fix the rest of the problems to a large extent, I'm sure."

"You don't know that. Our humans might be _mostly_ harmless, but the new ones aren't, those will just keep coming, you said yourself they bring strange weapons. Shove the fellowship in a gate and let the purists fix it for us – they do nothing but whine we won't let them fix things. Why not?"

Sesshoumaru thought very hard about _not_ reaching over and choking Choshu...pleasant though it might be, it would not help.

Tosa shook his head, and began speaking again, voice carrying over the rest of the arguments. "Why don't we get Kagome in here? _She _at least would have to be involved in the gates – there's not much on how they work, but all the things agree that you need someone who's got miko power in on this."

"...bad enough they let women on the council, let alone a miko..."

"Choshu! Tell me you did _not_ say that!" Satsuma glared at him. "Besides, she's hardly _on_ the council – only coming in to tell us more about what she specializes in. Tou was just in here, you never said anything about him!"

Sesshoumaru sighed – he could already feel a headache coming on. He wondered how Kagome was doing, outside. She felt...anxious. Which was hardly a surprise – she must surely feel how much frustration he had. Sesshoumaru relaxed, just the slightest bit. In a funny way, that comforted him – she cared enough to be worried over him.

"Fine, fine! What do I care about tradition!"

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Sesshoumaru felt...frustrated. She wondered what was going on in there. Kagome turned nervously, red miko hakama swishing, as the door opened and she was met by Satsuma.

"Come on – it's not going to be fun, but come on in." Satsuma shook her head, whispering slightly. "Choshu's being an absolute idiot again."

Kagome swallowed hard. Idiot? Uh oh...this did not bode well for her peace of mind...

Drawing herself up tall, and settling her white top into place, Kagome took a step forwards through the door, probably, she thought, looking a lot braver than she felt. She hoped it was enough...

Kagome looked around the chamber -it was a nice enough place, but the atmosphere was tense. She could feel anger...and Sesshoumaru, she could tell, remained frustrated.

She wondered vaguely what she was getting herself into_ now_...

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_42. That is all. XD_

_Actually– not all. You can't escape without more than that as a comment! Lol. Evidently I've spent __**far**__ too much time reading those books... It's also been a long, long time since I read some of the stuff on Underhill. (If there's a huge error, please forgive – I'm making use of 'artistic licensing' there, and its literally been years since I read a lot of that kind of thing. )Hopefully, I've managed to mesh the ideas together – I do think its logical that they're somewhat related. If you've ever read some of the Serrated Edge series– the Underhill there is a worldwide thing. Kitsune do brush shoulders with elves in those books, there's Underhill markets...the works. Quite fun. There's also elves that do racecar driving. XD So this is not a totally original idea, but I'm interpreting it in my own screwball way. XD_

_As a __**disclaimerish**__side note – I own neither the Serrated edge series, nor the Hitchhikers guide to the Galaxy. I'm just referencing them. :) _

_So I hope that makes sense to you as well as me! Just a few more loose ends, and this story will be done. Thank you so much for reviewing:) Really appreciate hearing from you guys!_


	45. ch43:Whatever words I say

To clarify on last chapter – sorry if anyone thought I was doing midsummer nights dream or Tolkien elves – the Aes Sidhe / elves / the fair folk, the gentry, whatever you want to call them, in this story are taken from legends that were old before Shakespeare even wrote his play. Perhaps I should have used something like Nuada Airgetlám instead of Oberon, but it was a good joke, and far more recognizable, I'm sure. :D So this idea is actually far more related to the Gaelic myths, and things of that nature than midsummer night... kinda why Serrated edge is related, they use things closer to that as well. If you care to look it up – dolmen are the old burial mounds that were once believed to lead Underhill. I mentioned the Serrated edge because it uses that image, not Tolkienesque or Shakespeare elves.** My fault** – I didn't clarify before. _**Sorry!!**_ (bows very low - in part to duck any things thrown her direction)

**:: Whatever words I say ::**

Kagome watched the council, and they watched her. She felt uncomfortably like a mouse on display in front of a pride of lions. She didn't dare look at Sesshoumaru – she didn't know what she might do!

"Kagome – what do you think of this, first off?" Tosa started to ask, voice as kind as could be expected in the middle of a council of youkai. Kagome smiled and perked up just a little. Jerk he might sometimes be, but he wasn't too bad sometimes. She rather appreciated the niceness right now.

"You mean the gates in general, or the fact that I think they're the best solution we have?" She realized, now – the youkai had disappeared, but they hadn't gone, not entirely, not forever.

The idea had been churning in the back of her mind all night. Things suddenly made sense...why there were no youkai, or so few that it hardly mattered, why they suddenly vanished all at once, why so many little details seemed to fall into place if you assumed that this was how things went...

They were gone, but not dead – youkai would move on and remain in the world. It was actually not a bad solution. Kagome shook her head. They had gone to the Otherworld, behind the gates.

"Oh, come on. There's got to be a better solution that _that_ drivel! I don't think things are that serious, either." Choshu looked disdainfully down at her. Kagome glared right back at the lord of the east, and suddenly, she wasn't nervous anymore – now she was just plain_angry_. So _blind_... eyes fair crackling lightning, she drew herself up ramrod straight.

"No? I can tell you this, Choshu. In less than 300 years, the youkai will vanish."

Kagome looked Choshu square in the face, unblinking, and her voice grew a little louder.

"That is something that will happen, no matter how you try to avoid it. A _fact_. If you all die, that is one way to vanish, I suppose. If you leave, that is a better way, to my mind. Either or, the choice is yours. Just know that your days have a number, Choshu – at the end, you will be _gone_. Dead, or not."

Choshu looked at her. "300 years? Have you seen this, miko?" He was mocking, perhaps, but a faint note of hesitation had entered his voice. Kagome's voice had held such conviction; and she had spoken of his end. Barely there, that hesitancy, but enough to show the chink in his armor, from Sesshoumaru's viewpoint.

He watched with more than a touch of pride as Kagome stood a little straighter, and hit right back. Beautiful, and strong enough to stand up for herself. Sesshoumaru didn't care that she'd practically made a prophesy about the end of the Japanese youkai – or an alternate ending, if you looked at it optimistically. He didn't care about that at the moment, just that it was Kagome who was saying it. He still watched, transfixed, unable to wrench his eyes away even had he wished to.

"Yes; I have. I can tell you a fair amount of what will happen for the next 500 years or so, though not everything. And the world will change, Choshu. If you don't prepare now, you _will_ die. That is just how things are – not as you like them to be, but as they are." Kagome looked right at him – Sesshoumaru watched with some amusement as Choshu wavered. It was very clear that Kagome absolutely believed what she was saying, and that was throwing him a bit. She wasn't mad. She wasn't spouting death threats; simply saying, in a slightly sad frame of mind, that if things continued, that's how it would go.

Choshu sat back slightly, face slightly troubled, not able to say anything. Somehow, Kagome had managed to hit home with him where the rest of the council's arguing hadn't.

"Ah...so you do not see the humans leaving, then??" Ezo interjected, questioning.

Kagome turned to face her, tones softened from the harsh voice she had used with Choshu. "No – the Shogun, the human one, will try to keep them out in future. But eventually, that will not work. Japan is only a small part of the world – we can't keep everything out forever." Kagome smiled, a little wistful.

"I think in most ways that is a good thing, so long as we find a way to get along in the end." If the western world hadn't ever come to Japan, things would have been really really different – but probably not as good. She didn't know, of course – that got into complicated things like butterflies and earthquakes and pandimentional multiverses...but it was a good guess, she figured.

"Oh." Ezo spoke softly, and looked down. "I had hoped...for a better vision of the future, miko. Yours is very bleak. But that speaks for its truth." She looked back up at Kagome.

"You mean if I honey coat it with sugar and pretend it's all fine..."

"No – I know you mean the best. You are honest, miko. I think...you have managed to gain my vote."

Tosa shook his head, vastly amused. Watching Kagome plow her way through Choshu had been in many ways, quite enjoyable. He'd wished to do that for so long... "You know, Kagome...I was actually asking about the gates. Do you think you could make them work?" All well and good she'd made that little speech – in fact, he was rather grateful for it. But...to get back to the original question, which was still relevant...

Kagome froze, and then flushed. "Ah...right."

"Not that I don't appreciate your input on the matter – it is definitely a different perspective than the rest of us have. Am I right?"

Muttered agreement was heard.

Still blushing brilliant red, Kagome looked down. "Well. Then. Yes. That."

She took a deep breath, and began. "I looked through the notes Tou sent us, but I haven't actually found anything concrete on how the gates themselves are set up, or how to do that myself. I know how they work, in theory, and I know about how useful they are. I do not know what conditions are necessary for their construction, nor what goes into maintaining a gateway. I do think I could learn though. I really hope I could. If it does not sound presumptuous...I have a fair amount of raw power, and I learn more about control of it all the time."

Kagome looked down modestly, still a little red. And she'd gone and shot her mouth off like that...!

She did not add that she didn't know of any other miko who were up to the task – in all her years of experience, (which were, admittedly, few) she hadn't ever met anther miko as strong as her. Kaede had always thought she was fairly gifted. A matter of opinion, perhaps...

With the bond she'd recently become part of, that power had probably grown, because she could, with Sesshoumaru's good will, draw on him for help. She was sure that for this, he wouldn't mind of she asked. But Kagome didn't mention that – it was their secret for now.

But – regardless of her ability – she was likely the only miko the youkai could get to agree to help them quickly. If she actually knew how to set up a gate properly of course. Apparently, this gate needed a strong youkai to operate it as well – she and Sesshoumaru could work together, but there was no one else she could think of who might be willing to try.

From the very very little Tou had set down in writing about the gate itself, it sounded complicated. Far more complicated than anything she had ever done...

Kagome resisted the impulse to laugh outright. She had time now – more than time – to learn how to control that power she'd spoken of, now, thanks to Sesshoumaru. She could learn, surely, given a lot of time and a teacher.

Kagome shook her head – she'd talk to Sesshoumaru about it, about working together, later. Right now this was all purely hypothetical. Presumably the gate idea would work, but it might not – she didn't know. And even if that was the final solution, even if she'd seen it, that didn't mean any less work on her part to get there.

Sesshoumaru watched Kagome fall silent after answering the question. She felt a bit thoughtful, but definitely not nervous anymore. For that he was glad – all they'd needed was to get her a little angry, apparently...

And then she'd scared Choshu – that had been mildly entertaining for him. Was funny how the nervous, quiet ones at the back could be so scary if provoked. He'd known Kagome had a temper before now, but he hadn't quite expected that. At least it was directed at someone else.

"So then – are we finally in some sort of agreement? As Tosa said: This problem isn't going to go away – we have to deal with it, and both the extremist Fellowships and the Purists have the wrong idea of how to go about it." Shu finally spoke up, looking up from his notes. He didn't actually have much of an opinion either way – but to summarize what the rest of them were saying for the purposes of minutes...

Slowly, people began to nod.

"Good – a vote?"

For something like this, things would have to be all four domains in agreement. Sesshoumaru raised his hand immediately, as did Tosa. Hesitantly, Ezo added her own hand.

Choshu grumped a bit, but eventually...he too agreed, hand half heartedly raised. He had been barely convinced, it appeared.

Shu began to write the minutes down – paper crinkled a bit under his hands as the brush moved over the fine sekishu paper, a permanent record. It was done.

Tosa sighed, relived. He had never thought they would reach an agreement this soon! He'd expected another week at least – and perhaps not even then. Another hurdle crossed – they still hadn't actually agreed to anything more than 'yes, there is a problem.'

But...for now...

"Excellent! Now that's done with, who wants lunch?"

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Sesshoumaru ate slowly, trying to think of any and all the possible ways he might inconspicuously manage to sneak away from lunch, with Kagome. He did want to talk to her...preferably, alone.

It wasn't that he disliked his...well, _most_ of his fellow taiyoukai. He and Ezo tended to get along not too badly, considering, and Tosa was definitely the closest of the three, with Satsuma on good terms as well. Choshu...well...

He'd long ago given up hope on ever liking him.

But – back to the original thought – he would rather talk to Kagome away form everyone else. Tosa would just make smart remarks, Ezo would look askance, and the shaky 'truce' for the moment with Choshu would totally disintegrate, perhaps taking others with it.

Kagome sat next to him at least – Sesshoumaru watched the conversation flow around him, watching for an opportune moment...he had visions of himself sweeping Kagome off her feet and running away. He wasn't entirely sure why he was thinking that way, but for some reason, the thought was rather intriguing...

Except for the part where she got mad, then scared, and either ran off or tried to hit him...

Sesshoumaru sighed. Sneaking off alone would cause more comment than staying and talking ever would – it was simply a dream. Pleasant, but a dream...

Instead, he turned to talk quietly to Kagome. Some things, as he couldn't get her alone, would simply have to wait till later.

"Kagome – those gates – what else have you learned about them?"

Kagome turned to face him, a slight smile on her face. "About the only thing I actually know about them is that they need youki to function as well...so if I were to work on them I'd need a youkai to help. You could, right? I mean...considering...you're...a fairly strong youkai..."

Kagome hoped Sesshoumaru was smart enough to read between the lines. Sesshoumaru was strong, but they also shared a bond. That might help them to work together more easily as well. At the least it probably wouldn't hurt...

She really wanted to talk with him later on tonight when they were back in their room, and able to actually have a conversation. Kagome smiled slightly. Last night had been very nice; she had never fallen asleep basically hugging poor Sesshoumaru's tail before...what he thought of it she had no idea, but Kagome had ...had a really nice night.

Well – technically she had fallen asleep on him before then. But she wasn't going to count all the times she'd been exhausted, half dead, or otherwise not in her right mind. Last time had been the first time she'd just sat in the stillness, and drifted off, wrapped in warmth and not a care in the world.

Even if it never happened again...she had never felt like that before. It had been ...nice.

Sesshoumaru gave her a slight smile. "I don't believe I got to that part in the notes Tou left; intriguing, however..." He leaned forwards slightly. Kagome felt...happy, right now, to him. He was glad – she deserved to be happy. She didn't deserve to be dragged into everything, really; he wouldn't force anyone to face Choshu. But she wanted to, for whatever reason.

He leaned in just a little more, unwilling to leave – he could, faintly but there, catch her own personal scent. Just Kagome...mixed in with the silk of clothes, the odors of food, the scent that told him she was human, but there, underlying it all...

"Sesshoumaru?"

Oh. Damn.

"...yes, Tosa?"

Damn Damn _Damn_ Tosa...

"The council is starting in a few minutes – are you ready? Ezo and Choshu just left..."

Damn Tosa _and _the council...

"...I suppose..."

Ah...if only he could slice Tosa's head off...Satsuma might not like it though...

Tosa gave him a strange look. "Sesshoumaru? You alright?"

Kagome was watching him too, eyes slightly concerned. He blinked once. Oh...this was not the time...

Really. Damn Tosa. But... "No, I'm fine. Shall we go?" He couldn't, he couldn't...no one could know that, not even Kagome...he had to control himself, to focus; he'd just spent the last few days convincing everyone she was a business partner, not...

Meaningful.

Oh, _d__amn_it all.

All he wanted was last night back over again.

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Council was not fun; after all the breakthroughs that morning, Choshu was proceeding to be most stubborn, as if to prove that he would not be told what to do so easily. A dozen suggestions were made, and as easily and quickly discarded.

No, necklaces would not work – who did Kagome think he was, a commoner? People wouldn't stand for that sort of thing!

Trading? Why, they must be out of their minds!

Interaction! The idea! Say, rather, fraternization...

It was getting more ridiculous by the minute – eventually, Ezo, of all people, simply shook her head.

"I think we have had enough for today, Shu. Things are simply deteriorating."

"Yes. I agree."

"Me too..."

Kagome groaned her agreement – she'd had a bellyfull hours ago. She remained unclear as to why Choshu hadn't tried to get her to leave; perhaps he'd simply wished to torture her; he'd succeeded, in that. She'd thought it would _never _end...

She hurried out the door, and after a light dinner, bolted back to her shared set of rooms.

Sesshoumaru watched her go; he didn't blame her. He felt like curling up in a corner himself right now. She felt...unhappy. And that was not right. She should be smiling...

He couldn't be seen following, not so close on her heels. He waited on tenterhooks, thinking. Back to lunch, this was – all he'd wanted then was to go back to last night, to before Tosa had so rudely barged in. Comfortably sleepy, close to someone he was only beginning to know, but who he wanted to know better very much...

He already knew this fact for sure; he couldn't seem to get her out of his head. No matter what he tried. The only thing he hadn't, so far, tried, was to try and spend some time with her. He was going to do that anyway; he wanted to talk about tomorrow, since he hadn't had a chance to plan a course of action. He had a faint idea...

They needed to just send someone to visit Oberon, to learn the techniques of building a gate – they had to have that in place before a decision could be made; even he could see that...they would get nowhere with this otherwise. They had to have the ability to make a gate before a final verdict could ever be reached.

But he had to talk to Kagome; she was the only one who could do it, and he couldn't force her to go, and he wanted, had wanted at lunch, to ask her what she thought of it.

He'd go too, of course. Something of that nature would need him and her both. He didn't want to let go of Kagome either, not for that long. That didn't hurt. Such a journey would take _months_...

It was only an idea, now. Kagome had a family, a village; she might not want to do it. She had responsibilities that lay here that he had no call to tell her to leave. He could only suggest, and if she said no, to never mention it again. It was the only way out, because the council would never agree to something they had so little real information on, but he would respect her decision.

With an effort, he refrained from fidgeting. Only the young did that. And the exceptionally nervous.

The lamps burned lower – he watched them like a hawk through dinner, half a mind on the conversations around him, answering Ezo and Tosa with less than full attention. As soon as the flames burned past the hour mark...

"I'm sorry, Tosa, but I believe I shall retire for the night."

"So soon?" Tosa waved his chopsticks at him. "Need your beauty sleep, I guess? Well...I suppose that might work, one day...oww!"

Satsuma smiled beatifically at Sesshoumaru, retracting her own chopsticks as she spoke. "Goodnight. We shall see you early tomorrow I expect."

"Indeed." Sesshoumaru bowed, covering a faint smile, and gladly, at long last, retreated.

Free...!

Sesshoumaru walked the corridors by himself, trying not to hurry. But he was happy, and his footsteps light; in no time at all he was there, and then he paused outside the door.

Such strange feelings...merely the thought of time spent talking to Kagome was an incentive. But he was happy; happier than he could remember ever being before. And all he was doing was going to go in, say goodnight, and hopefully not get yelled at for plotting such a far flung plan as going to Europe...

The idea scared him a little; leaving so soon after becoming lord, the west would suffer. Europe was far, and quite unknown. But...if he didn't go alone...he could do it, he was sure. If he was not alone.

Kagome had been there for him when he was stranded in time; he could do it if she came with him. If she...

Well. Standing outside the door would do him little good. Slowly, Sesshoumaru pushed aside the shoji screen and entered.

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Kagome sat on the bare tatami mats, cross legged, back arched forwards so that she could rest her head on her folded arms, on the floor. A bit of a stretch perhaps, but she had never minded. The tatami was cool against her forehead; she rested there, outwardly calm but inwardly, the eye of a barely constrained storm.

Sesshoumaru felt unhappy; he was still at dinner. Was today's council that bad? She didn't know, but he'd been unhappy since lunch. She'd been too, a little. A long day and a boring one...

Right here, last night. She'd fallen asleep...

The wind rushed in through the window, chilling her, mocking. Sesshoumaru wasn't here now, but she still missed him. And it wasn't like he was even that far away...! He was a few passageways and a courtyard over. That was all. This was silly...

Last night...Kagome allowed herself to dream. It had been so very nice to lie there with someone so nice, someone who cared. He did care; she knew he did, however he tried to hide it. But...it was unlikely that there was anything more than friendship there. Perhaps...if she tested things too far, if she said something she could never take back, not even that.

She hadn't ever felt like that with anyone before. She had felt safe with Inuyasha, for the most part...but that was generally because he'd tended to stay up all night being the camp's guard dog, so to speak. Hojo...well, safe, in a sense, but that was because she had felt safe anyway in modern Tokyo; it was her home turf, in a way. He had actually even made her feel uncomfortable at times. That was not supposed to happen, was it? Well, no...which was why things would never have worked...

But this...was different. It was as though the whole world had gone away, as though there was another world, where nothing could harm them, where they were in their own little universe...

Kagome closed her eyes, and hugged her knees, curled up tight. The wind was still cold. It was making her eyes water. It was definitely the wind. It wasn't because her eyes were wet, not at all. It was just the goddamn wind...

She curled tighter, focused inwards; he was still at dinner, but leaving, now. And...for some reason, happier. Maybe Choshu had been boring again and he was glad to escape; she didn't know. But...he was coming here. And he couldn't see her like this!

Kagome blocked him out, tried to ignore him. Every time she did her eyes watered, and that was no way to hide anything. Block him out, block him out, fix her eyes...she rubbed at them furiously, glad of the moonlight; it bleached all the colour from the room, made the colours fade away into ghosts. Red eyes would be easier to hide...

The door suddenly slid aside; he was here.

Oh. Damn.

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Sesshoumaru knew immediately she was upset; he had felt it as soon as he walked into the room. Distantly a part of him noticed that she had somehow hid that from him...interesting. He didn't really know how their bond worked, not totally. Something for later investigation. But now...

Why was she upset? She had been crying...he could smell the salt. Sharp and cutting – it hung in the air between them, making him feel sad in turn. She should not cry...

"Kagome?" Sesshoumaru slowly walked across the floor, and stood beside the huddled up form of the woman he knew. His fingers twitched. He wanted nothing more than to reach out, and...

No. She wouldn't...want that. Would she?

No...definitely not...

But...

Sesshoumaru swallowed. He had a feeling he was jeopardizing everything. If Kagome slapped him away...if she wouldn't let him hold onto her, as she had done for him, to be a shoulder, to be, maybe, perhaps, something more...

But if he never tried, never found out, never asked...

Better to risk, or better to forever wonder?

His fingers twitched, ever so slightly, and slowly, reached forwards...

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Kagome jumped when a hand lightly touched her shoulder, and then she let out a deep breath. She hadn't thought Sesshoumaru would reach out like that...! He'd startled her.

"Oh...I'm sorry. I...wasn't expecting..."

A wave of hurt crashed over her, echoing through the bond. She'd done something...no, no...

Kagome shook her head, confused. No! ...what...what had she done...? Sesshoumaru...!

She didn't know what she'd done to make this sort of reaction from a simple motion, a simple gesture. She hadn't meant to hurt him, not at all, but she had, oh, she had...she had to make it right, somehow...

"Sesshoumaru?"

"...yes...?" He even sounded hurt...and no emotions ever came thorough that mask. Never...

Kagome didn't think; she reached for his hand. "I...didn't mean..."

A wavering smile hovered below his golden eyes. Still so much hurt... "I simply thought that someone who offered me a shoulder, once, might...wish the same."

Kagome smiled, and blinked. Her eyes watered again, and she brushed at them with her other hand. Oh... there was no reason for that...really, there wasn't...

Sesshoumaru took a half step forwards without thinking, desperately trying to control his own face. She didn't want...this was ridiculous, he'd only put out a hand, it wasn't the end of the world she'd moved away...

Was it?

Kagome slowly stood up, face turned away from him, turned down. She didn't want him. Sesshoumaru swallowed, hard, smile still desperately fake. "I..."

He was utterly surprised when Kagome suddenly reached out, and gave him a fierce hug, holding on as though if she let go, the world would end.

And suddenly, simple as that, the world was made right.

"I'm sorry, Sesshoumaru. You...surprised me." Kagome whispered, words muffled through fabric, though nose pressed against his shoulder.

Sesshoumaru didn't speak, not at first. He blinked slowly, still shocked. It was a mistake, an honest mistake, just a mistake, only that and nothing more...

He held on tightly, fingers curled against Kagome's neck, held on as tight as he dared. He didn't care if the Western domain went up in flames and those little green men from Mars Kagome had told him about once invaded; he was too happy to care.

In their own world.

Kagome breathed deeply, nose pressed against the lapel on Sesshoumaru's kimono. It was funny; the human nose was such a weak little thing. But...if you got close to someone, even so, you could tell they were there...

She could feel Sesshoumaru's tail wind itself around her ankles, and she felt each time he breathed in, or out. So close...

Perhaps it was an eternity, perhaps not; definitely too short. But time flows, and Kagome's arms eventually loosened, as she drew away just far enough to see Sesshoumaru's face, see his eyes.

"Sesshoumaru..." Kagome blushed. Oh, dear...what if he thought she'd been far too forwards, what if now, he pushed her away? No...but that hug...

Sesshoumaru let go of her, and then his hand came back to rest against hers, and clasped it tightly.

"I just... wanted you to know that you were there for me; I want to be there for you." Sesshoumaru whispered back. He let go of her hand, and his fingers quickly, gently, brushed against her cheek.

Kagome smiled. She knew now knew he wouldn't push her away, wouldn't run, would stay. He would stand beside her..."I know. I know you are. And...I'm glad."

Quick as thought, one of her hands reached up, and brushed the bangs from his eyes, white strands glinting in the moonlight. The other hand reached for Sesshoumaru's and held to it tightly.

So strange – only moments ago she had been so unhappy, and now...all it had taken was a hug. She could feel him, a bright light in the back of her mind; he was just as happy now. He had to know too that she wanted him to stay with her. No words had passed between them, but actions spoke louder anyway.

Kagome felt like dancing, but settled for a smile, and a quick squeeze of his hand. So happy...

But unfortunately, new realizations began to intrude as well.

"You know they can't find out."

Sesshoumaru grimaced. "We have, as I recall, spent the last near week convincing everyone that Damia lied..."

"Yeah. Seems...a shame, but..." Kagome shook her head, the butterflies in her stomach silently rejoicing. He wasn't going to push her away...!

She didn't know what she'd have done then. She didn't...theoretically the world would have continued, of course, but...

Wouldn't have been the same world.

"We'll get through it. Somehow."

"Yeah." Kagome squeezed his hand.

Sesshoumaru smiled – really allowed himself to smile. "...You know, I'd nearly forgotten why I wanted to talk in the first place."

"Oh? What was that? A plan to shut Choshu up, I hope?" Oh, please let it involve sending super ninjas to shut Choshu up...!

"Actually, yes. I would have mentioned it before, but...you needed to hear it first before I brought this up." Sesshoumaru smiled, and sat down. Kagome followed his example, relaxing.

"I doubt that anyone will actually come to an agreement, unless we have all seen a gate and know that it works first. Then I suspect things will settle down but unless we have that..." Sesshoumaru shook his head.

"Theres no way to get a gate to show off for them instantaneously, obviously. No one here knows how to make one. But you...and I as well, as the gate needs two to work, if we went to Europe..."

"You mean learn how to make one from the people over there?" Kagome frowned. "That would work – I think its a good idea. But..."

"But?" Uh oh...

"How long does a trip there take?"

Sesshoumaru frowned. "Likely several months there and back – and that is without knowing how long we shall stay. I will not lie – that might be a bit more than you bargained on."

"No...it's not that." Kagome smiled. "I think I will go. I would just need to have some time to prepare. My family..."

"Of course!" Sesshoumaru smiled again, eyes dancing. Everything was perfect. "I think it's a wonder you'd even consent to come. Are you sure?"

"Pretty sure. I doubt I'll change my mind between now and tomorrow morning, but..." Kagome shrugged, and yawned. "Oh, goodness..."

That was a pretty good idea – her mind was whirling. She'd have to say goodbye, to explain, to send letters, to go to the village...could she take Shippo with her? He might like Europe. They'd need to plan so many things...and what would Sesshoumaru do about the western domain? Wasn't he supposed to rule it now again? He'd have to find a 'domain babysitter' of sorts and, and...

It was all a bit overwhelming at first. "I think I want to go to sleep again...leave it all for the morning."

Sesshoumaru smiled, and his hand went to rest against hers, holding them tight, covering her smaller hand with his own. Kagome watched; her fingers were no strangers to hard work, but against his larger hand, worn from gripping a sword, she felt a little smaller...not in a bad way. Just simply smaller. Like a piece of a puzzle – they fit together.

"Alright. I'll still be here when you wake up."

Kagome smiled back, and let her other hand rest against his, moving so that she was more comfortable, so that she could sleep, curled into a ball of red silk and white fur, glinting in the moonlight. She was, to be fair, very tired. It had been a long, draining day and it was quite late by now. Sesshoumaru felt tired to her too, just a little. He would probably go to sleep soon too, and drift off into a sea of dreams.

Drift off into sleep together... Kagome smiled. She was so very happy right now...and she could feel happiness flowing back along the bond – Sesshoumaru felt the same. There was nothing else in the world just then. Only the two of them, comfortably sleepy.

She already had her dreams – the quiet peace of sitting with someone special, curled up against the shill, drifting away together into a doze. With Sesshoumaru...

"I know."

_'I know you'll still be here'_

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_Tada! Kagome lets loose on Choshu (he was asking for it) Some of you even called it as I was writing that part. XD (I must be getting old...hehehe)_

_And...fluff. Again. :) Woo! Haha – anyone think I went too fast? I mean, perhaps 40...3...chapters wasn't enough? XD lol. _

_Again, apologies for the whole 'midsummer nights / Tolkien' thing. Stupidity on my part. A common occurrence, I assure you. :) Will try to get the next chapter up as soon as I can. Will likely be the last (baring an epilogue) chapter. If not last, then second last..._

_Thanks for all the reviews:) Appreciate them a lot. Kinda like xmas presents...hehehe. Happy holidays to you all!!_


	46. ch44:In the kitchen

_**Disclaimer:**__ Me no own Bioshock, therefore, you no sue. (I'm a starving student artist besides – so you'd get __**very**__ random bits of things like heat guns, wax, ink, and wire - and very little of value for your trouble anyway. It's all gone to university tuition and fancy paper...)_

**:: In the kitchen making tea ::**

Kagome smiled as she picked at her breakfast. This morning was pretty good so far. But then, last night had been pretty nice too.

She was even hopeful that this endless verbal sparring would end today. She had decided last night, and she stood by her decision this morning; she'd go to the Europe of what she was fairly sure was 1551 with Sesshoumaru. So...maybe late Renaissance times, then...right after Florance and Michelangelo so on...if what she remembered of European history was correct. She wasn't that familiar with European history though, so who knew?

More to the point, even aside from the fact that they'd get a lot of time to spend out of the eyes of the rest of Japan, sorting things out (they really needed that time, she felt...trying to pretend there was nothing between them was _not_fun, even now that she new there was something there for sure...) it needed to be done for other, slightly better, reasons too. They hadn't come this far, committed this much, to stop trying to fix the state of the nation now! Even traveling in the coming winter, which seemed likely as they were into fall weather, wouldn't deter her.

Kagome absently added another item to the list of things that would have to be dealt with. Family of course. They would not see her for months once she left, and it was hardly fair to leave them in the dark without consulting. Sesshoumaru had agreed already this morning to come visit them with her; she suspected he was bringing a thank you gift for 'putting up with him,' in his own words...

She had told him it wasn't necessary, but he insisted that now he had a way of showing them thanks with more resources at his fingertips, he was going to do so. And truth be told...if it was something in the way of funds for the shrine, that would not go amiss. She couldn't well say no to it. So that was going to be dealt with at some point. She had to return to her birth time, first.

She would have to talk to her friends here too...Sango and Miroku she would miss, a lot. She would also miss the birth of their first child, just as she had their wedding...she didn't think she'd make it back in two months. She'd try to find something for them in Europe. Maybe a baby gift...she wondered what Sango would think of a European broadsword, she'd seen one once at home in a museum, maybe that would be nice...or something...

She wondered how closely the elves - or youkai by any other name – in Europe followed the myths she had heard. One of her passions had been folklore at home, while cut off form the past. That had mostly been Japanese folklore, but she had done a little bit of reading on other culture's myths as well. She wondered how much of that would apply, and how much was just that – myths.

After all – _she_knew the reality of youkai, and it wasn't always like what had been written...and so the tales of the wild hunt, the artistic licensing of 'A Midsummers Night Dream', the snippets of things she vaguely remembered that were somehow connected to the Tuatha Dé Danann...she had no idea if they were real or not, and how much she didn't know at all would fill books...

Heh. Oh well. She'd find out when she got there. She'd always flown by the seat of her pants; she'd managed before.

Apart from that, Shippo...Kagome was going to talk with him and ask if he wanted to come with her. She had promised him that she would never leave him behind again...and while this wasn't a 'safe' journey, it was far from mortal peril. She could watch him.

Kagome shook her head, and stopped playing with her chopsticks, thoughtfully munching on breakfast. She still couldn't wipe the smile from her face, but refrained from reaching out to touch Sesshoumaru on the shoulder. It was enough that he was close, and happy, even if he didn't smile on the outside like she did. Besides – this was breakfast, and public. They were still 'pretending.' Even if she ached to reach out and simply brush his shoulder...

Things were finally starting to sort themselves out, even if they were currently at an impasse...nothing would move till the council approved, so not until they returned, in a few months...but it was still better. She had a feeling it would somehow work out.

So it was with a light heart that she waited outside the chamber door, as Sesshoumaru made their case inside.

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It was actually easier to get everyone to agree than he'd thought; Agreement, after all, meant that the council session would be over. And they weren't actually agreeing – just putting things off. Always easier than actually making a decision...

Besides – the bonus was, that since this council session had been called close to the annual fall meeting point, they'd get to skip_ this _fall's business. They'd dealt with it first thing this morning, as well as the emissaries to Europe. Nothing else that needed discussing had been brought up in the past bit.

Tosa grinned. "So we'll see you all again once everyone gets back from this little trip, aye? Next years council, likely?"

"Indeed. I look forwards to the day." Choshu drawled. Clearly, he didn't mean a word of it.

Sesshoumaru said nothing as the chamber was cleared, and the council was officially adjourned till next year's round of torture...he still had a long way to go, even if everyone had agreed that they should put things off till later. About the only other thing that had been decided was that a few representatives, already named, should go with Sesshoumaru and Kagome to Europe, bearing greetings and other official business, and to see about some serious trade deals. Routine bureaucracy, in other words...

As they left, Tosa slapped Sesshoumaru on the back. "Well, now. That went better than I thought..."

"Because we didn't actually _agree_ to anything except to put it _off_, Tosa." Satsuma sighed. "I wish you luck, Sesshoumaru. Do you know who you are appointing as caretaker in the time you are gone? We'll try to help, but the West does have to stand on its own."

Sesshoumaru nodded. He _had_ actually given the matter some thought – it was rather important, especially considering that things would be bad enough already even without his imminent leaving! The West would be in a bit of a state for a while anyway, because of the recent changes Damia had made, and then to change leadership again...

Who to appoint as steward - or perhaps, in this case, stewardess, was a very important decision. He had it in mind to ask Sorai if she would consent to the job for a matter of months. She had helped a great deal while he had been preoccupied with Naraku, and in truth, with so many of the higher officials first weeded out by Damia, and then Damia and Kyohei in turn killed and Mesau gone...it should be both easier and harder. He wasn't worried about a coup d'etat, but there would definitely be a slew of promotions coming up, in all likelihood...

"Sorai should be up to the task – she has always, and continues to be, a most reliable individual. I hope not to be gone too long, but in that event...I think she is up to it, providing she agrees."

Sesshoumaru nodded politely to Tosa "So I think I shall be off to go ask, actually." He bowed, and left Tosa and Satsuma to go and stand with Kagome.

"They agreed then? I thought it would take longer." Kagome smiled brightly. She'd have thought it would have been another hour, at least...nothing had happened fast before now, at any rate...

"Apparently not." Sesshoumaru smiled. "Come with me – I have to go find Sorai."

Together the two of them left to go find the elusive, newly reappointed general. Who also happened to be in charge of intelligence, but most people didn't know that. It was sort of an unofficial side job.

Kagome waited in their chamber, once Sesshoumaru had dropped her off there, and watched the window. He'd have gone to ask about the steward thing, she guessed. Meanwhile...

They hadn't discussed the next step, yet. Kagome wondered if they should go back to her own time first (she was sure Sesshoumaru would want to come along, and wouldn't mind) or to visit Sango first. Tosa had, kindly, agreed that Tanuma and Sorai should hammer out the details between them. As far as Kagome knew, once they arrived back in the south they and the representatives, as well as anyone else, would be leaving on a ship.

Maybe this Ben person she kept hearing about would lend a hand – the Dutch trading ships were a good way to travel if you could get a fast one, like his. He'd been trading with the disguised kitsune for a while...Tanuma was on fairly good terms with him.

Her own time first, or the village...Kagome considered. She had to pick up a few things from the village, now that she thought of it, so perhaps her own time first. There was little to bring back home other than whatever Sesshoumaru was cooking up, and she didn't plan on bringing anything back from home with her, much. Everything she needed was right here...

Kagome sat quietly, enjoying the afternoon sun, wondering how Sesshoumaru was getting on. She had a feeling this would be one of the last few quiet days for a little bit, at least until they were at sea...

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Sesshoumaru was getting on rather well in fact – he was busily talking to Sorai, discussing possible promotions and getting caught up on what had transpired while Damia had ruled. He still wasn't sure of all the details except third or fourth hand.

He was very lucky, Sesshoumaru thought, that he had at least one person still trustworthy enough, after all this, to leave in charge. Apparently the old toad, Jaken, was still around, but a more incompetent minion Sesshoumaru couldn't recall He was, however, entertaining and had at one point, been good company for Rin. Perhaps a bit for himself as well. He had been very lonely before, he realized now, but he had never realized it, not until a few people had begun to reach out to him through that and showed him how alone he really was – and a way out of it.

"...so if you get Jushi to do that, then maybe in a few years she'll be ready to be promoted."

"Yes, yes." Sorai cast an amused look at him. "I am grateful for your confidence and trust in me, Sesshoumaru, but...some of that can wait till you return, can it not? You ought to be gone less than a year, and if not, barely more than that."

"I suppose so..." Sesshoumaru shook his head, and gave Sorai a tiny smile. "Major decisions like that one can be delayed – and I do trust your judgment if a major decision which requires more immediate action comes up. With the purists being very quiet, hopefully things will be more peaceful for a time, at least."

"One can but hope." Sorai bowed low to him. "Thank you, Sesshoumaru. I will try my uttermost to live up to this great honor!"

"As always, I continue to thank you for your diligent work, and for the loyalty you have always shown. It is I who should thank you, Sorai." Sesshoumaru bowed back. "And now, I think I will have to go hunt down Tosa...if you will excuse me?"

Sesshoumaru left Sorai happily organizing her possessions and making arrangements for her own return to the west, carefully tucking away the seals and signatures from Sesshoumaru that verified her position."

That was the one piece of advice from his father that had really proven true, Sesshoumaru thought. Lead through loyalty, and not through fear...it had always been a good way to do things, and now, it was paying off for him as it never had before... He really did have to think of some sort of promotion or raise for Sorai. She deserved it. Maybe a goodly amount of time off to see her family...he doubted she'd been able to do much of that lately...

Now. Tosa. Sesshoumaru wanted to know when they should be in the South by...Kagome had a few loose ends to deal with, as did he, before they could leave on such a long journey.

He had asked Sorai to send Tosa the amount he was planning to borrow in the next few minutes, as repayment. He had also, as well, asked her to send a few specific...items...to him from the West at the South before leaving at the same time. Perhaps, over the course of the months ahead, they would prove worthwhile bringing. Unlike Sesshoumaru, Tosa had traveled with a small amount of cash, presumably for bribes. As long as Tosa agreed, he'd be alright...

He thought Tosa wouldn't mind lending him a few things for what amounted to, basically, a week. He wasn't asking for too too much... he rather thought that if a small fortune suddenly descended on the Higurashi shrine they'd have to explain where it came from. He didn't know much of that future world, but he rather thought that 'Well, we took care of this Taiyoukai for a while, see, and he wanted to help us back and so on...' wouldn't really work as an explanation in most cases.

Oh well – he wanted to repay them, even though they hadn't asked him for anything, and he suspected this would be the best way.

Sesshoumaru knocked on Tosa's door, and entered. He smiled slightly as he began to lay out his plan and frame his request. This would be a nice surprise for them, he hoped...

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By the time all was said and done, it took them a few days to finally extract themselves from the spiderwebs of Aizu. There were so many people to talk to, so many little deals to be made on the side, plans to be laid, supplies to be gathered, arrangements to be made...

Kagome didn't know how Sesshoumaru did it all – she had never seen him as particularly good at organizing before, mostly because he'd never been trying to do something like this, but there he'd been, in the thick of things. A lord had to be good at all that, she supposed...it had never crossed her mind before, but being good at battle was hardly the only thing to be looked for in a good ruler.

Finally, at long last, Kagome and Sesshoumaru had left by themselves, giving the (mostly true) story of going to visit her family and village before heading South again, and leaving for Europe. The other Lords and Ladies had already left, some of them; Tosa and Satsuma had gone a day before to begin their own work, as had Ezo – Choshu left the same day Kagome and Sesshoumaru did.

Kagome watched the statues lining the road to Aizu fade into the distance as they walked. Aizu had been interesting...not her favorite, but...interesting. It was a relief to be away from it, to be honest, away from the constant watching of what you said, of who you said it to...it had dragged at her. At least Sesshoumaru was used to it, but he had told her he didn't really enjoy it.

It hadn't been all bad though. They had accomplished, if not their overall objective, at least something. And...Kagome looked at Sesshoumaru and smiled, and slowly, her hand crept down to his, the fingers warm against her wind chilled hands. She smiled wider as the larger hand gave her a squeeze in return, and the flash of a golden eyed grin. She stepped along briskly in the cool fall breeze, glad of the warmth beside her.

She had found Sesshoumaru, there. They were far from sure of things, either of them, but at least there was a chance...

And pretenses aside, things had been nice. She thought of the nights spent close by, comfortably wrapped in fur, of simply sitting together, not thinking of the hard looks in the day, the masks, the pretending...

...and of the now, of being able to hold his hand without fear of compromising their political position. There were no spies here...Mesau and her birds were no longer an issue.

Although Kagome did wonder how Mesau had made those birds – maybe one day she'd have to try some shikikami of her own, see if she couldn't get a few handy birds...version 2.0, of course. Improvements could be made. She was planning on getting a large stash of paper and that book of origami from home. Maybe she could try her hand at that on the boat – er, ship – ride there.

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Mrs. Higurashi leaned on the broom, eyes slightly tired, but without the baggy circles that had been under them of late. So many things to tell Kagome, once she came back...!

Almost absently, her eyes went towards the old well house and the drift of leaves that had settled close by, that needed sweeping. Maybe today Kagome would come back. Maybe not. Probably not, in fact.

She always worried...and Kagome had seemed overtly cheery when she had left. That meant she was nervous, and Mrs. Higurashi did not like to see that – if Kagome, who had seen so much, more than she had shared with her family, she was sure, was nervous, then what _had_she been walking into with that Sesshoumaru?

She shook her head. She had always worried – it was part of her life now, and it always had been. If not about Kagome, then about her father, or Souta's marks, or the shrine...

Well. Today was one of her few days off – she intended to make the best of it – and besides, things had actually been not too bad of late. That friend of Kagome's from the museum, Chihero, had been in to visit her a few times to drop off letters for Kagome in America...it still bothered her to lie, but the truth would never work...and asked to see the collection in the back of the shrine. Grandfather had of course obliged – he'd always been a friendly sort, even if by now a little vague, and frail. Hojo had taken to coming around and visiting, to check up on him, like he had today.

He'd proudly shown the two collections they had to Chihero – the one directly attached to the shrine, which held great sentimental value, and the one that was, or so she had thought, been little but a glorified scrap heap...

Apparently she'd been wrong about that – Chihero had been quite excited about the collection, both of them, and if Kagome came back soon, she might be able to see some of the 'worthless junk collection' move to the museum, and be restored by expert hands to its former glory. Mrs. Higurashi hadn't minded letting go of that collection in the slightest; she'd never really wanted to keep it, it had been her father's idea to do so. The family one they would of course keep, but the other would be much better off in a museum, better off viewed and admired, than locked away in a room collecting dust. Even her father had finally agreed with that.

And besides – the extra money was a huge help to her. Maybe this shrine could turn around, with a little luck...

A small noise made her turn her head, but then she relaxed. It wasn't the well house, just Hojo. Oh well...

"Mrs. Higurashi? There's tea inside, if you want some. I made a fair amount."

"Thank you, Hojo. Is my father still sleeping?" He'd been napping earlier, she thought...

"Yeah – Souta started talking about video games again, and he fell asleep in the middle of it. Still quite out." Hojo laughed. "You know Souta, when he gets going..."

"Oh, do I. Kagome used to be able to keep him mostly occupied, but..." Mrs. Higurashi shrugged.

"But she's not here now." Hojo finished for her, and then turned his eyes to the small shrine over the well. "I wonder how she's doing..."

"I wonder too. She was worried last time she left, and I don't know what that means."

"You worry over her too." Hojo smiled. "So do I, but... I've figured out by now that thats where she wants to be. Sometimes I wish she'd told me about it before, but...can't change that."

"No..." Mrs Higurashi shook her head. "Anyway. I'm nearly done, here. Why don't you go see if Grampa's awake and I'll be in in a moment, and we'll have a nice afternoon tea together. I do appreciate you coming by, Hojo. He likes talking to you, and that does him as much good as anything else, these days."

Hojo smiled. "I don't mind coming on my days off. Besides – you feed me some of your cooking...for that alone..." Hojo laughed, and went in.

Sakura Higurashi sighed and watched as he left. Such a nice young man...sometimes she wished things had worked out between him and Kagome. But such was life; they hadn't.

She looked down at her sweeping up of leaves, and worked towards the far corner. Nearly done...

So absorbed in thought was she that when a gentle hand touched her on the shoulder, she dropped the broom.

"Kagome!"

Kagome laughed. "Sorry Mom. Guess you weren't expecting me..."

Mrs. Higurashi smiled. No, she hadn't, but she was glad all the same. She looked over her daughters green and white clothes, with some neatly mended tears all down the sleeves, and at Sesshoumaru behind her, who looked decidedly different in his prayer beads. Black hair swept up in a pony tail, and modern clothing; it took her a moment to realize it was actually him, under all that illusion. The only things that remained the same with a cursory glance were the missing arm, and the long, long hair. Closer inspection would reveal more, but at first look...

"No, I wasn't – but you showed up at the right time. Tea's just on. Hojo's been visiting Grampa, and I'm sure both of them wouldn't mind if you came by and joined us." Mrs. Higurashi gave Kagome a hug, holding her daughter close. Kagome held on just as tightly, glad to be home, even if her mother had no idea how long she would stay. "I'm glad to see you. And you too, Sesshoumaru."

Sesshoumaru bowed slightly to her. "Thank you once again for your hospitality, Sakura Higurashi."

He reached behind him, and withdrew a small bag from a pocket, or at least, what appeared to be a pocket. Illusion was at times confusing. He had already decided that he'd give this to Kagome's mother; her grandfather seemed to be a little unwise in terms of business ventures, and Souta, far to young and annoying in any case. He could sense Kagome's distant resignation, and a touch of amusement.

"I brought this for you, and your family. Please accept it, as thanks for all that you have done for me." Sesshoumaru remained a little amused as well. How much had changed in the past little while, in himself, more than anything! Once, he would never have dreamed of giving a human family a gift like this with his own hands, and in those words...he would still have sent them something perhaps, but not personally. And a long, long time ago, simply not killing them would have been enough...

He gave Mrs. Higurashi the small bag, privately amused as she nearly dropped it. It was heavier than it looked, by far!

"Why...thank you, Sesshoumaru. But you really didn't..." Mrs. Higurashi opened the bag, and stared, open mouthed. "Sesshoumaru! You can't..."

Inside, a small glittering pile of gold Ryo coins clanked together softly, ovals of metal 15 by 5 centimeters. No wonder they had been heavy! Kanji in India ink covered the faces, cutting through the soft shine of gold. Mrs. Higurashi stared at them.

Kagome stared as well – she had never had much more than a few copper Mon at a time, in the feudal era and she had never seen such wealth before...he couldn't be thinking of giving them this...!

"Yes, I can. Please accept it, Mrs. Higurashi. Believe me, it is small enough repayment for what your family, and Kagome, have done...I would have brought more, but I wasn't entirely sure how you would pass off finding them."

Mrs. Higurashi shook her head. "I think...there's a way. The museum wants the secondary collection we have, Kagome, and they've promised a good deal. Far better to let people see them than let them molder away in a shed, I thought, and now...if I mix these in, in that old empty chest with the false bottom..."

Mrs. Higurashi looked stunned, still, and quite unsure of what to say.

Kagome broke the silence, and settled for giving Sesshoumaru a hug instead.

"You really didn't have to, you know." She whispered to him, low enough that her mother couldn't hear. "You owe us nothing..."

"I know – but I wanted to. I wanted to do something for you." He whispered back. "You've done so much for me." He gave her shoulder a quick squeeze, and stepped away.

Kagome smiled at him, and shook her head. She suddenly wasn't as worried over leaving her family for a while; they seemed to be getting along okay.

"Then...I guess I will accept them. Sesshoumaru, I..." Mrs Higurashi shook her head, at a loss.

"Well. Um. Would you like some tea? The leaves can wait for now – I'm sure the trees will drop more anyway soon. Its been an early cold for fall..."

"Indeed." Sesshoumaru permitted himself a small smile, and turned to follow Mrs. Higurashi, fingers toying absently with the beads looped around his wrist that were generating his illusion. He wasn't sure why he'd worn it, to be honest. A whim. He could tell Hojo was around – might be nice to see him too.

He hadn't really appreciated the human at the time, but he wasn't a bad sort, on reflection. Any human willing to see to a sick, possibly murderous Taiyoukai and then to scream at him afterwards for just stupidity deserved some respect.

Sesshoumaru wasn't going to tell anyone but Kagome that he'd changed his feelings on the matter – everyone else got the same rough treatment, but privately...oh well. Grown soft, he had...

Sesshoumaru smiled on the inside.

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Hojo's eyes grew round as he took in the people following Mrs. Higurashi into the room, and he stared, mouth parted slightly as Kagome, followed by Sesshoumaru, entered the room. He hadn't seen Kagome for ages! This was a pleasant surprise...particularly Sesshoumaru, he didn't think the youkai would have wanted to return to the future at all, once he'd returned...

"Grampa!"

"Kagome!" Grampa sat up, and hurried over to his granddaughter, smiling wide...until he caught sight of Sesshoumaru.

"**You!** Get out! Shoo!" Grampa shoved Kagome behind him, and snatched Buyo up from the carpet, pointing the fat cat in Sesshoumaru's direction. "Buyo! Attack!"

Buyo yawned.

"Father...!" Mrs. Higurashi snatched poor Buyo from Grampa's hands before he could drop him and started scolding. "Stop that! Sesshoumaru probably doesn't really like you doing that. And no more scrolls, either!" She added, taking the scroll that had mysteriously appeared in his hand away.

Mrs. Higurashi looked back at Sesshoumaru, face worried. "Please excuse my father..."

Sesshoumaru saw remembrance in her eyes, of the one time before, when Sesshoumaru had gotten angry. She needn't have worried; and here, after all, what did pretenses matter? She was scared of him...but she no longer had any reason to be.

Before, he might have been bound only by honor; it wasn't good to kill your hosts. Now, he would never even consider harming Kagome's Grampa. Funny, how a few short months could subtly shift your perspective. He had to let Mrs. Higurashi know her fears of harm were unfounded...

"Do not worry over it; I'm aware of what he's like." Sesshoumaru glanced at the 'scrolls' in Mrs. Higurashi's hands. "Though perhaps if he wanted to do a better job next time, at least use proper paper, not the cereal box cardboard you've got there..." He smiled, slightly.

Hojo stared. Was it possible that Sesshoumaru had been making a joke, there? A sense of humor? Would wonders never cease...!

Grampa sulked a bit at that, and Kagome laughed and gave him a hug from behind. "Don't worry over it Grampa; we're not staying long. He'll be gone soon enough. Oh yes; and hi, Hojo!" Kagome waved o over at Hojo, who was still watching the little drama unfold, bemused.

"Hello. Glad you could come, Kagome. I haven't seen you for, oh, a few months now..."

"Not staying long?" Mrs. Higurashi asked as she brought up a few more chairs around the kitchen table. It had been a long time since her daughters last visit, a few weeks was when she had left looking worried, and before that a stretch of a few months...

"No; I'm afraid not. And I have bad news, too...I have to go on a long, long journey. I won't be back anytime soon. But let's not worry over that now, okay? I'll say goodbye tomorrow morning."

Souta ran into the kitchen, after Mrs. Higurashi had called him down, saying Kagome was there. "Kagome!" He gave her a quick hug, while she listened to Hojo.

Hojo smiled. "Going back again that soon?" A little wistful, but...oh well. He'd long since accepted they were only good friends. Come to think of it, he had to tell Kagome about this nice girl he'd met at medical school...

"Yeah – you wouldn't believe the things I saw in the past few weeks! There's a youkai city, Hojo, called Aizu..." Kagome then proceeded to recount most of the tings that had occurred while she'd been gone. The complex play of politics, and Damia, Mesau and her spying, the South, Aizu...she explained it all to the happy chaos of family and friends.

She skipped the fact that she'd been quite badly injured by Damia, glossing that over – it was unlikely her mother needed to know her poor baby was injured at the moment, though perhaps later – and she also skipped the bond. She'd tell her mother later, in private. That wasn't something the intended to tell Grampa, Hojo or Souta at all.

Her family was a good audience – they oohed and ahhed at the most appropriate moments, and kept asking questions. Souta, for some inexplicable reason wanted to know all about the kitsune 'spies'...

...Well, perhaps not so inexplicable. Kagome caught mention of the fact he'd been playing a lot of Bond stuff recently.

Absently, Kagome wondered if Tanuma would like being compared to either M, or Q, or some other agent. He didn't strike her as the 007 type, somehow. Not enough 'charge in, gun firing' action from him. To much of the 'real' spying. Information, not guns...or even arrows, seeing as it was feudal times. Sorta.

Hours later, when the tea was gone, food eaten, and the story done, and Hojo had said his goodbyes, Kagome leaned back into the couch. Souta was trying to show her and Sesshoumaru his latest game – again – and she had agreed so that Mom and Grampa could get a moments peace.

Grampa had gotten a little bit older in the months she'd been gone...Kagome wondered how he was managing. A little frailer, and slightly more vague, perhaps. She hoped her leaving would let mom and Souta manage...

"Do you want to try Bioshock, Sesshoumaru? See, you can do this, and get rid of the modified zombies, and the big daddies – you can kill the little girls, get a reward that way...I'm only halfway through the game, see, but you can do that...or this..."

Sesshoumaru raised an eyebrow. Killing little girls? What sort of 'game' was that? "I'd rather _not_ kill children, Souta. Even particularly annoying ones."

Kagome winced at the slight anger she could feel radiating off Sesshoumaru. He'd gotten a little better at shielding emotions thorough the bond, but not enough that she couldn't tell at times. At least it was only a game...

"Well, you can save them all too, but you get less stuff that way." Clearly Souta wasn't really paying attention; it was, after all a game, and not real. He didn't take it nearly as literally as Sesshoumaru did.

Sesshoumaru, at that, agreed to play and started a new game under Souta's careful watching, and constant advice (most of which was ignored). Kagome smiled, seeing him go through and diligently either set the children free, or save them...for all the bluster, and the harsh exterior, he was a good youkai...she'd always known it.

Kagome watched the two of them climb through the city of Rapture, thinking. She wanted to talk to her mother after dinner, once Souta returned to paying with Sesshoumaru, and Grampa was having his nap. One of those 'serious adult discussion' talks...

Once dinner was called, and Souta raced off to get a seat, Kagome poked Sesshoumaru. "Would you mind keeping Souta busy while I talk to Mom after dinner? I don't really need him underfoot."

"Of course. And if you play that game...properly...it's not that bad. I'll manage." Sesshoumaru gave her a small smile, and put a hand on her shoulder. He wouldn't have minded sitting in on that talk, nor would Kagome, but someone needed to keep an eye on Souta...

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After Sesshoumaru had once again been kidnapped by Souta, and Grampa gone to nap up in his room, Kagome offered to help clear dishes.

"Thank you, Kagome. I appreciate it."

"No problem, mom. And...I wanted to tell you a few things I left out earlier..."

Mrs. Higurashi set the plates on the counter, running the water in the sink. "What did you want to tell me?"

"Well...I mentioned that there were gateways, right? I think I'm the only one who could learn to make them right now...and to do that, I have to go to Europe. Tosa kindly said he'd get us a ship and we could go that way. It's going to take a few months though. I'll be gone for a long time, mom."

Mrs Higurashi sighed. She'd just gotten to see Kagome again, too... "You do what you must; you always have. I think by now I've accepted that you only come here to visit us..."

Kagome closed her eyes. It wasn't that she didn't like the present, but the ties that bound her here were quite weak. Most of her friends she rarely saw, and she had nothing like a job anymore, or school. Family was the main reason she came now.

"Yes – but thats not all. You remember the part of the story where Sesshoumaru and I came back and were attacked, right?"

Her mother frowned. "Yes." That Damia, attacking her little girl...ooh! Good thing she was already dead, or Mrs Higurashi would have had a few things to say to her...!

"I made it sound a little better than it actually was. We didn't escape – we retreated. I don't really remember that much, to be honest...Damia almost killed me and I was nearly dead at that point. If Sesshoumaru hadn't run, or saved me..."

Kagome's mother's heart nearly stopped. "You nearly died?" She whispered slowly. That was...serious... Kagome, Kagome... "I...should thank Sesshoumaru then." Poor Kagome...she was glad, so very glad that Sesshoumaru had saved her little girl...

Kagome saw the tears in her mothers eyes, and gave her a hug. "It's okay, mom. I'm still here, and I don't think that kind of thing will ever happen again..."

"No – it's not okay. I nearly lost you...and I never even knew it." Mrs. Higurashi gave her a fierce hug. "Don't you ever..."_ 'Don't you ever do something so foolish again; don't you ever die...'_

"I'm sorry mom." Kagome whispered. "I can't promise not to do something like that again, but I can tell you that I'll be better prepared next time...because of what Sesshoumaru did. He saved my life then by creating a bond between us, one that allowed me to heal faster, that let me borrow his strength...we're both stronger. But...I thought you should know."

"A bond?" Kagome's mother looked confused now. "I'm not entirely sure..."

"A bond between us – its been done before, Ive read things about it. That's what Damia and Mesau had, even if it was a little different, it was still a bond of sorts. I can borrow his strength, now, and he can do the same of me. It's...permanent, though. I thought...you'd want to know. Souta doesn't really need to know, and I think Grampa would just get confused, but...you... "

Mrs Higurashi laughed. "Oh, I can see Grampa now, trying to figure that one out..." But inside, she wasn't laughing. Kagome...every time she saw her daughter, she was further away from her. It was sad, and she couldn't see how to deal with it...how to fix it except to send her daughter off tomorrow morning with a smile...

Kagome smiled as well, but somehow, things didn't seem quite right...

Conversation turned to more idle things, including Mrs. Higurashi teasing Kagome about at least picking a rather nice looking young man to attach herself too... Kagome's ears burned and her face flushed red...

Sometimes, her mom really, really scared her...

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Kagome eventually left the kitchen, and headed towards her room for some extra blankets for downstairs. She wanted to say goodbye to it, as well...

Something told her that it wasn't really her room anymore. Just as this wasn't really her home. She wasn't sure what her place in the world was, what 'home' meant now. It had always, before, been here. But now...she wasn't sure.

She surveyed the closet, and the desk, unnaturally clean. That meant it wasn't being used. There was nothing here, now...She had taken Tenseiga and the fire rat clothing with her before. Sesshoumaru held the sword now, though both understood it was a 'loan' – if she really wanted the sword she could have it back. She didn't mind him having it though. Tenseiga and Tetsusaiga should remain a pair. The fire rat clothing remained in the bottom of her bag...safe. She had moved on from where Inuyasha had held her, but she still kept that as a memento. It was nice to think of all the nice old memories...

While she thought of it, she emptied the drawers of paper and the book on origami, for later. Maybe she'd get a chance to try it.

The rest...the closet was organized and clean, everything packed away. Her photo albums were here – she took a few of her favorites photos out, and carefully placed them on the desk, leaving a note detailing which negatives they were from. She'd have to ask her mom to get duplicates of them after they'd gone – she'd have to put the photos in something that would protect them for the journey, but she wanted to be sure... She'd have the photos reprinted here.

There really wasn't anything else but clothing, here, now. Kagome shook her head. Once, in school, clothing and brand names had been so important, but now, it was just clothing...and some of it rather impractical, at that. Her green and white miko clothing was fine by her. Easy movement, heavy, durable material...all she needed. She'd changed a lot from the shopaholic teen she had been in what seemed a lifetime ago...

It was odd; it felt like she was a stranger, like she would never come back here again...she didn't know why, but a twinge of feeling, or premonition, told her that if she didn't say goodbye now, she would regret it later.

She didn't know what that meant, but that premonition had never led her wrong. Ever.

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Sesshoumaru watched the clock, alternately, and the game. Close to 11 now, it was. And, he was nearly done...Souta hadn't seen the ending of this game yet, though he'd heard rumors about it being 'interesting' before he'd stopped hanging out on places that had spoilers.

Kagome had finished talking some time ago, and now, she sat on the couch, having turned it into a makeshift bed. Apparently Sesshoumaru was to get her room again. She had a small bag by her side – he had guessed she had brought a few things with her that she wanted from home, but it didn't look like much. Whatever it was, it was securely wrapped though.

He suspected he'd find out later. Pushing more buttons on the controller single handedly, Sesshoumaru wondered. She felt...sad, a bit. He wondered why. He would ask later, when they were back 'home' and alone, where annoyances like Souta weren't underfoot...

Sesshoumaru's fingers twinged – playing this game was awkward. The controller was meant for two hands...he was fast enough to usually make up for it, but now his hand was cramped. He could tell Kagome was tired. Maybe he'd call it a night too...

"Here, Souta. Thank you for the game." Sesshoumaru handed him back the controller, and gracefully got to his feet. While Souta called out goodnight and began to pack the game system away, Sesshoumaru said goodnight to Kagome. Mrs. Higurashi and Grampa were already in bed, as far as he could tell.

Time he was too, then...

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Kagome laid awake in the night, thinking still. Sesshoumaru...without him close by, it was cold. She shifted around on the couch. And not nearly as comfortable. She finally got up and went to the kitchen, thinking to make herself some tea. She hadn't been nearly as close to Sesshoumaru since her arrival back 'home.' So much had happened, so much to tell...there had been no time to sit together.

She wondered if he was sleeping soundly upstairs, in what had once been her room. Softly, dishes clinked together as she reached for a mug, and herbal tea. Caffeine would be less than useless, at this time of night...she'd never get to sleep then!

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Sesshoumaru was also awake. It seemed strange to him to be back in the future, in Kagome's room, but without Kagome. He could still, ever so faintly, catch her scent from the room. It was hers, after all, and she had spent so much time here...

Somehow, that was relaxing, but not enough to get to sleep. He was amazed to find that their never-really-discussed-it-just-happened sleeping arrangements, Kagome curled up in his tail, had so quickly become normal. That had only been...for the past week, really...

He missed it.

Around him, the house creaked, and he could hear the wind outside, whispering. Sesshoumaru got up and crossed to the window, opening it slightly for the breeze, watching the clouds roll across the sky...

He frowned slightly. Someone else must be up too – he could hear the faint noises of movement downstairs. He couldn't tell who was up though, not from here. He moved away from the window, curious. Maybe the Grandfather was up, making scrolls in the kitchen...

...Maybe...maybe it was Kagome?

Sesshoumaru didn't know. But he could go and find out, couldn't he? Kagome...

He had been so sure, once, that if he said anything of the strange ideas, strange emotions floating about in his head, that she'd run away. He was slightly scared of them too; he wasn't quite sure what to make of them. But...he'd dared to do something, and it had shown him that she didn't seem inclined to run. Instead, she'd seemed far more inclined to curl closer...

This was an interesting turn of events, and Sesshoumaru was looking forwards to having some time alone to talk with her. Just the two of them. No Council, no annoying Tosa, no spies, assassins, nothing. Just them.

Sesshoumaru made up his mind; he'd go downstairs and investigate. If it was someone else, he could just say he didn't need to sleep much, being youkai. True enough. If it was Kagome...

Well – how about he found out? Sesshoumaru noiselessly crept down the stairs, eyes wide pen, searching. He could smell the faint scent of tea.

And...more than that – it _was_ Kagome!

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Kagome looked up as Sesshoumaru wandered into the kitchen, and smiled. "Why are you up so late?" This was a pleasant surprise...

"I couldn't seem to get to sleep. I gather you felt the same?"

"Yeah." Kagome grinned, and went out on a limb, walking on a tangent. "I missed my fuzzy blankie."

Sesshoumaru blinked. Did she mean _him_?

...that was a first. He did not, in a all his years, ever recall being called a 'fuzzy blankie' "I missed you too."

He walked around the table, and, carefully, gave her a one armed hug while Kagome remained seated at the table. She smiled at him, eyes dancing. He could fell how happy she was to see him.

"Guess we haven't had much time together, or at least, time we could use to say things...all those people in Aizu..."

"I've long suspected that they live on rumor." Sesshoumaru smiled. Here, with Kagome, he did not mind letting her see him smile. She could tell how he was feeling anyway; why not smile while it was just them?

"Yeah – you got that right. I thought it was silly, wanting to stay with you, and we were pretending the other way the whole time..."

"I wished we hadn't decided on that; but I thought...if I said anything to you..." Sesshoumaru sighed.

"That I'd run?" Kagome laughed softy. "You know what's funny? I thought the same thing. Because what Taiyoukai, with all that, would ever want me around?"

Sesshoumaru shook his head. Had she really thought that? "You might say that, but I have never had much interest in the courts doings. The smarter ones are manipulative, and carry concealed daggers. The not-so-smart ones are either brainless, or quickly consumed by the more voracious ones. I've never met anyone like you, before. You've...always been different. Far more interesting, even when we stood on opposite sides, and since then, everything Ive learned of you has made me want to know more."

He was a little scared to speak so plainly – he never had before, not to anyone. But if it was to be anyone, surely Kagome would understand...

Kagome blushed slightly. Did he really think that? She wasn't that special...but hearing him say that, she could feel it; he believed it. To him, she was special.

"You...you were always a little bit of a mystery. I thought you couldn't surely be that cold. Rin...it seemed to me you must have some sort of heart somewhere. Brave, and honorable...and I wanted to help you. I'm not sure where that feeling changed, when I finally figured out that I wanted to stay with you, if you'd let me, but...I was scared you'd see just a ratty little miko."

Kagome shook her head. "Silly, wasn't it?"

Sesshoumaru sat down beside her, and leaned in a little. "Kagome – you have never been a ratty little anything. Even before, you had my respect. Perhaps not much at first, but even that much...I don't give things like that out lightly."

Kagome reached out, and clasped his hand, tea quite forgotten by now. "I know. I know. I still think it funny though, that all this time, we were scared of the same thing..."

"Yes – I honestly had never thought of that before." Sesshoumaru shook his head, amused. "And to think how 'silly' it was..." to use Kagome's own words...

"Yeah..."

Slowly, Kagome leaned forwards towards Sesshoumaru, and lightly kissed him on the cheek, blushing. She had never kissed him before... Sesshoumaru paused for a moment, and then, kissed her back, fingers delicately tracing out her cheekbones.

She sat back, smiling. Sesshoumaru returned the smile, and Kagome's eye danced. Smiling...she had never seen him smile like that...

"What do you think, Sesshoumaru?" She whispered.

"Think of what?"

"Do you think this will work? I mean...won't some people be upset if they..." She whispered, reaching around his shoulders. They were a lot wider than hers...

"Let them." Sesshoumaru hugged her shoulders, tail slowly wrapping around her waist and the chair legs. "They have little enough say in my own business, and even if they don't like things, that's too bad. This is my own choice."

He looked thoughtful for a second. "Though, actually, if you control the gates along with your own miko power, and the Shikon...even the most stubborn youkai would have to agree you've got enough to earn their respect. There's that, if nothing else. If you're the only one who knows how to do that at first, even if others learn...I suspect you will be the one in charge. For one thing, our bond..."

Kagome smiled. "Yeah. I'm glad we have that, even if it wasn't the best way to start off."

"No indeed. But I'm glad as well. I have no regrets." They definitely hadn't started off on the right foot – Damia had nearly killed her, and he wasn't that much better off at the time...come to think of it, he'd tried to kill Kagome the first time he'd met her, too...

Buy, had _that_ ever been a mistake! Good thing it hadn't worked, miffed at the time though he was...

"Neither do I. And...I suppose I haven't thought of it a lot, all the things that means. But...I'm glad I get to live as long as you do. I can help look after the gates – assuming we get them - for a long time too."

Kagome smiled at Sesshoumaru again, and moved a little closer. "There's so much to talk about with you..."

"Yes. I think...I could tell you anything. Good thing we have time, then, isn't it?"

Kagome laughed low in her throat, and hugged Sesshoumaru close. Who said he never had a sense of humor? "Yes, it is."

She smiled as Sesshoumaru held her close, warm and happy, and kissed her again.

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Kagome said little that morning, as they said their goodbyes. She hadn't slept much last night, having spent a good deal of time sitting over tea talking in the kitchen, but that didn't bother her. Sesshoumaru still wore the illusion beads, but removed them just before stepping through the well. Souta seemed impressed.

Kagome gave her mom a hug, and stepped back, eyes damp. She didn't know when she would see her mom again, but that same something from last night spoke to her heart, and said 'a long time.' True enough – almost a year, perhaps, for all she knew, was a long time. She had given her mom a time estimate that long at any rate.

One last time, she grasped Sesshoumaru's hand, and they fell through the well. Through time.

Kagome held to his hand tightly all the way to the village, towards Kaede's hut, only letting go once they were nearly there. She was going to miss her family...

Distantly, she could see Kaede herself sitting out in the sun, hands busy with something. Beside her, Shippo was playing with his top.

"Kaede! Shippo!" Kagome let go of Sesshoumaru's hand with a squeeze, and ran to scoop him up in her arms, the tiny kit just a bundle of fur.

"Kagome!" Shippo was happy to see her. "You came back"

"Yes I did – not for long though. But this time...will you come with me?" Kagome looked him in the eye, nose nearly touching his. "Last time was dangerous – the both of us nearly died – but this time, you can come."

Shippo bounced up and down, quite happy. He'd never be alone again! "Yes! I wanted to go too, you know!"

"I know – but I wasn't joking when I said Sesshoumaru and I both nearly died...you...well. I didn't want you to get hurt." Kagome gave Shippo a hug as Kaede stepped up, eyes crinkled in a smile

"Kagome! Ye be back! I was wondering when you would be returning." The older woman gave her a huge smile, and nodded at Sesshoumaru, behind her.

"We were wondering what happened to ye...reports of things recently have been most strange..."

"Yeah! You wouldn't believe the rumors that have been going around of late about a fight in the west...Sango and Miroku can tell you. They should be back soon!" Shippo bounced up and down in Kagome's arms, and it wasn't entirely due to the chocolate stash he could just smell in her bag, either...she was back!

And this time, he could go with her..! Wherever they were going, that is. He had no idea, but that didn't bother him. So long as he was with his 'family' again, that was all that mattered. Sango and Miroku were nice, but Kagome...he viewed her as his mother, nearly. Father had been good to him, but his own mother had been gone for a time even before the unlucky day he'd lost father and met Inuyasha's group...

Sango and Miroku eventually appeared, and there was a lot of talk and chatter. Sango was finding it hard to get around these days, despite her grumbling that she was still as fit as she ever was. Miroku just smiled, ducked the Hiraikotsu when necessary, and fervently hoped that the phase of finding odd things like chocolate for her to eat was over...

"So what actually happened, Kagome?" Sango eventually asked, once they had all gone into Kaede's hut to sit down. Sesshoumaru sat close to Kagome, but a little apart from the others. "We heard that Sesshoumaru was dead, that he and his lover were returned from the dead to strike Damia down, that you'd won...we've heard everything. But the youkai have stopped attacking, at least. So we rather suspected you'd won."

"Yes – Damia ambushed us coming back from the well – I'd planned to get Tetsusaiga, and then to visit you, but...things happened. Both of us were pretty badly off after defeating her. Lucky Tosa was there to get us sorted out, but by the time I was better we were in Aizu..."

"You went to the youkai city, Kagome?" Sango's eyes were round. "I've heard about it, but I think you could probably count on one hand how many humans have ever visited it..."

"Yes – humans cannot enter, save if they are invited." Sesshoumaru spoke up at last, from close to Kagome. "All of the lords met there, myself now included in that number again, and we got as far as at least agreeing that there was a problem that would require our cooperation. A solution was posed; a gate. They have them in the far, far West..."

"And we're going to Europe to find out how to make them for ourselves. They lead to other worlds, Kaede...maybe a world where all the youkai can go to live in peace."

Kaede nodded. "That will take a good long time, I should think..."

"Yeah – but it'll be worth it. And at least this time no ones trying to kill us, right?"

Miroku sighed theatrically. "Don't be so sure, Kagome – Sango and I might do you ourselves in for missing the event of our first son!"

"Daughter, you mean." Sango raised an eyebrow.

"No no, Sango, I'm sure it's a boy..."

"A girl!"

Shippo out his tiny head in his hands. "Oh no, not again..."

Kagome laughed, watching the two verbally sparring back and forth. Sesshoumaru merely looked bemused. Humans were indeed strange...

At last, after everyone was all talked out, and Sango had gone to lie down for a bit, Kagome and Shippo investigated Kaede's house. She had left some things behind before, as they had needed to both travel light and she'd thought th return. But now...

Kagome packed two bags of things, and Shippo packed his own very small one, holding a lucky feather, his top and other things.

"Shippo, I think we're going to leave this afternoon, okay?" Kagome gave him a hug. She was saddened by the thought of leaving here for an extended period of time, but while her place was in this time, this wasn't really her home either. Maybe she'd find it someday. But for now, she had places to go.

She fingered the Shikon, still riding around her neck. Maybe someone in Europe would know how to get rid of it, maybe not. It didn't really matter. Since she had hidden its power away with her own, it had stopped attracting all those youkai. To most, it was merely a strange shiny bauble, and she was going to take pains to keep it that way.

Miroku had been glad of that hiding of the jewel – the attacks on the village hadn't resumed since she and Sesshoumaru had destroyed Damia, apparently, for which she was glad. The Shikon didn't need to reemerge in this world – or even behind the gates.

Kagome patted her trusty bags, and tied them down, for later. Shippo had already finished. Nearly packed...

She looked around the corner of the hut she had called her own for a time; there was nothing here now but memories. All the things she would need were packed away, to be taken with her.

Shippo, herself, and Sesshoumaru...and whoever was sent to the European Emperor, of course. As she recalled, the domains were supposed to have sent the items that were going along with them by three days from now. Sesshoumaru had already arranged the wests gift of state...

All that was left was to say goodbye.

Goodbye for a time at least. Perhaps she would be gone, but not forever.

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_O.O long chapter..._

_Well, one more chapter left, peeps. (and an Epilogue thingy) Sorry this took a while to get out to you – wanted to semi-finish the story and make sure it was all good first, and actually find out how long it would be...never sure till I write everything how many chapters it is...that, and this chapter was about 20 pages. That takes a while to write!_

_Anyway – jumped around a fair amount, hope you don't mind. Loose ends..._

_Thanks for all the reviews last chapter, everyone! I really enjoyed reading them all. Glad you've all come with me and my deranged scribblings this far! Hope you enjoyed:)_


	47. ch45:Farewell

**:: Farewell ::**

Kagome waved goodbye, her hand and Shippo's tiny one working furiously as they flew further and further from the village. Sango and Miroku waved back from beside Kaede, Sango's eyes still a little teary...

Sesshoumaru faced forwards – as the 'driver' of their puffy cloud conveyance, he had to remain focused. That, and he'd not be caught dead waving, Kagome suspected. She'd wave extra hard then, for the both of them.

In private, he was quite open with her, but she thought fondly of the gruff pretense he put up for others benefit. Silly...

Eh – oh well. It seemed to work. She thought it rather funny, actually, and she could hardly expect him to change everything just for her. She didn't want him to, either...because he wouldn't be Sesshoumaru then. She was already amazed, when she thought about it, just how much he had changed...if you knew where to look. She was happy with how things were, and how they might, just might, become...

"How long do you think it'll take to head back to Tosa's house, Sesshoumaru?" Kagome finally said, once the village had disappeared from view. Shippo climbed on her shoulder to watch the landscape flow by beneath them. This was faster than he'd ever flown!

"I'd guess about a day if we had started first thing in the morning. We'll probably arrive there midday tomorrow. We no longer have to worry about taking cover, after all."

Kagome nodded. "True" Last time they had gone had been far more secretive...Sesshoumaru had flown a lot lower than this, and not as fast. They had also spent some time walking, too.

The afternoon passed mostly in silence – Kagome and Shippo chatted a bit, and occasionally he decided to fly beside Sesshoumaru. Sesshoumaru didn't appear to mind, much. He had never minded children, even before Rin. Children had always been free of the feuds that gripped the older youkai...

Kagome sat down on the cloud, and leaned against Sesshoumaru's legs as she had before. Shippo, eventually, became tired and had a nap beside her, Kagome watching him to make sure he didn't fall off. Sesshoumaru watched him too; that was one of the many things she loved about him. He cared...even if he took pains to never show it, she knew he did.

Kagome smiled, watching the sky redden into sunset to the west. Love...

Was this indescribable feeling boiling inside her love?

She'd thought she'd loved Inuyasha, once. And she had – more as a friend perhaps than anything, but the feeling had been genuine enough. And he had loved her back, in his own way, though never as much as Kikyou, nor in the same way. She had been a very good friend, but never in the same way as Kikyou. At the time it had been devastating, but now...she was glad it had worked out. After all, if things had gone differently, then she would never have met Sesshoumaru, never have gotten to know him so well...

She had seen how much Sango loved Miroku, and she herself had always had the love of family. Her mother, Souta, Grampa... they loved her as well. She had tried, once, to learn to love Hojo (that had been a huge mistake, one which, luckily, had been resolved) Love, in different forms, had always been a part of her life.

But this – this was different...it was as if her heart was a mass of rubber bands, always bringing her back to Sesshoumaru, now. Her thoughts, her feelings...they remained centered on him, springing back at the strangest times. They were caught together inextricably, by bonds of blood...bonds of friendship...the type of bond you found after going through so many things with someone. She could trust him absolutely, felt she could tell him anything, given the chance.

Bonds of love...

Kagome felt the bags sitting next to her; there was something about having everything you thought you'd ever need sitting right beside you, waiting to travel. She glanced at Sesshoumaru, standing next to her. Everything she thought she'd ever need...

Love...

She had never said it aloud before, nor even in her head. The word was loaded.

Yes...love. She believed that was the word, if any could be used, to describe this strange feeling...

She put a hand to her cheek, remembering how Sesshoumaru had kissed her last night. He had never done that before. Then again, neither had she...

The skin there burned; she could still feel soft lips. Perhaps it was silliness, or imagination working overtime, but...she didn't really care. Even if (highly unlikely) it never happened again, she had last night, the memories of talking long into the night, the feeling of being held in someones arms...and the feeling of happiness. She couldn't ever remember being that happy. She wanted to kiss him again, wanted to share so many things...maybe later she would take him to a movie, or a restaurant when they got back, or they could fly to a far off mountain, to watch the sunset...

As long as they were together, it didn't really matter when they were in time, or where, or even what world. Kagome could feel him beside her, and in the back of her mind, and knew the feeling to be mutual. In some ways, this bond thing was actually kind of handy...

Kagome idly fingered the fur that had somehow become, once again, draped securely over her shoulder, mind drifting to the strangest things...

And then again, in other ways, not so much. Kagome blushed. Some thoughts should perhaps be saved...for later. Furiously, she blocked those things from her mind. Not that 'that' was a bad thing, but definitely, definitely, not now!

As her mind, with much effort, cleared, the sky darkened; soon they would have to stop. Kagome didn't mind. After all – if they stopped for the night, she could curl up and fall asleep in her nest of tail, close to Sesshoumaru. Good enough for her...

As long as poor Shippo didn't freak out at the turn of events, that is. That was the only drawback. Kagome wouldn't dream of traumatizing him if it could be avoided. She doubted he knew how things had changed while she and Sesshoumaru had been gone...so it might be a surprise to him.

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That night things were fairly quiet. Kagome made them a small campfire, and she and Sesshoumaru sat together, listening to Shippo's excited chatter. He really was excited about going to Europe – he was anxious to tell her all he knew about it. Kagome had to correct all sorts of misconceptions he'd picked up.

"No, Shippo – they don't all wear armor and swing broadswords twice as tall as me. I think...if I remember right, they just left the feudal age because of the Renaissance. So the armor will have been put away..."

She smiled at Shippo. "Hey! Wouldn't it be neat if we got to meet some of the crazy people I learned about in school? We could meet someone like Jan van Eyck or Hieronymus Bosch. W could go to Florance, or visit the Flemish painters..."

"...who're they?" Shippo shook his head. "Did he invent chocolate?"

"...No...I don't think chocolate showed up till much later..."

"Well, then what's so interesting if they didn't make chocolate? Paintings not that fun" Shippo turned back to his tiny top, while Kagome shook her head. Above, Sesshoumaru allowed himself a tiny smile. Spoken like one who would rather play with a top!

Kagome sighed. "I think that's about the right time frame, at any rate. They might have been a bit earlier. That art history class was a while ago..." She grinned. "I still think it would be cool."

"...I still think meeting the guys who invented chocolate would be cooler" Shippo pouted slightly.

Sesshoumaru said nothing. He had rather liked the chocolate he'd found in Kagome's time...but it hadn't seemed to like him as much. Which was odd; he'd thought he was immune to most poison. But chocolate wasn't really poison, now, was it...just to him, apparently...

Kagome pulled out the papers from her bag, and began folding a crane as the night wore on, making their campfire a spec of light in the darkness, echoed by the starts above. Sesshoumaru and Shippo both watched, fascinated, as she folded and then gave the crane the semblance of a real bird, sending it to fly around Shippo.

He laughed, and ran after it, till it became late enough to sleep. Kagome smiled. He didn't seem affected by the fact she was sitting right next to Sesshoumaru, but it didn't really matter.

Slowly, Kagome and Shippo drifted off, leaving Sesshoumaru awake, guarding the camp, thinking strange new thoughts...

Yet, not so strange as all that...more as if...it was right.

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The day dawned clear; After breaking camp it was a fairly short, easy ride to reach the Southern palace. They entered the town openly this time, not caring for disguises. Shippo raced along beside them, investigating everything. Kagome took some time to look around the youkai town as well. It wasn't that dissimilar to a human one, really...and last time she'd visited, she hadn't really taken much in, having been busy playing the part of ditsy Amiritsu.

They were met at the gates by Tanuma, who assigned one of his aides to them, explaining that Ryakki was going to be going with them to Europe as an ambassador, of sorts.

"Ryakki, I'd be much obliged if you could show these three to their rooms, again. I'm afraid I'm going to have to leave you and deal with a few things that have come up..."

Kagome grinned. Tanuma looked like he was working hard – again. She was beginning to suspect that he usually did, though...

"Of course." Ryakki smiled, rubbing his paws together. "I think we should get along." He bent down and grinned at Shippo, as Tanuma nodded and left, leaving Kagome and Sesshoumaru saying hello to their new guide.

"What's your name, little guy? Surprised to see you with a miko and a Taiyoukai..."

Kagome smiled at their new guide. He seemed friendly enough. That was always a good sign.

Shippo grinned, proudly, glad of the attention. "Kagome takes care of me – she's really nice. She said I could come with her and Sesshoumaru!"

"Yes – he wanted to come." Kagome smiled. "I don't think that will be a problem, will it?"

"Oh no – Actually, he reminds me of someone I knew..."

Shippo grinned. "Really? What was his name? Mine's Shippo, by the way."

"Shippo?" Ryakki frowned. "You know, I think I have a fourth cousin with a son named Shippo...I might have to check." He laughed. "Who knows! You might be related!

Shippo's smile drooped a little bit. "Kagome takes care of me now – my mom's been gone for a long time, and dad died a few years ago."

Kagome gave him a hug, and Ryakki bend down, pausing in the walk to the castle. "I'm sorry to hear thet" He patted Shippo on the head. "Tell you what – you can call me Uncle Ryakki. I can show you all the things you should learn about Kitsune on the trip, too...Kagome might be nice, but I bet she can't tell you about Youjutsu"

Youjutsu? Kagome shook her head. "No, I can't. That would be very nice of you, though."

Shippo perked up immediately. "Really? Like how to make really, really big tricks, and illusions, and...?"

Ryakki grinned. "Yup! I'll make sure you learn enough Youjutsu to get Senior first rank at the yearly exam! ...In a few years, of course." He grinned even wider. "Hey! This'll be fun! Here I was thinking I'd get stuck with no one to talk with." He lowered is voice in a conspiratorial whisper. "Sesshoumaru's not very much for fun as a lord, I heard, you know. Not like Tosa and Satsuma are."

Behind him, Kagome stifled a laugh. Ryakki was obviously having fun talking to the younger kitsune, and Shippo seemed to be enjoying himself too. It must be nice for him to meet other kitsune. She hadn't even thought of that – there were a lot of them down in the South of Japan. This trip might be even better for Shippo than she'd thought at first, if he was learning a lot, and getting along.

"Oh, don't mind Sesshoumaru – he's okay. Kagome's nice though" Shippo chattered on happily, while behind the pair of Kitsune the miko and the Taiyoukai simply watched, amused, as they were discussed as if they weren't even there.

Kagome was glad – Maybe Shippo, even if he wasn't some distant relation, would learn some of what she couldn't teach him of youkai. And who knew? Maybe he _was_ related to some other youkai around here...that would be nice for him. She knew he missed his family, and there was little she could do for that. He never talked about them...this was a nice surprise. She rather thought he'd enjoy the trip to Europe a lot more this way.

She grinned at Sesshoumaru, who gave her a small, small smile in return. He must have caught her good mood...

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It was another few days before the ship was to leave – things had to be loaded, organized, and delivered to the human harbor, at Nagasaki. Ryakki's counterpart, a smaller crane youkai from the north, had to arrive yet, as the second ambassador, and another from the East. Sesshoumaru was lord of the West he was his own 'ambassador.' More gifts of state had to be accounted for, and the letters to the West drafted, and put together with an official looking seal. Things had to be settled. But in all...progress was made.

Kagome watched the days fly by, as she made her own preparations. Nights were spent with Sesshoumaru, sitting together late, talking. Days were filled with work, bustle, saying goodbyes, getting some scrolls from Satsuma on how to train in the art of fighting open hand, and a promise from Sesshoumaru to help.

Shippo in particular was enjoying himself; he seemed to thrive on the bustle. He had met a few other kitsune, including Satsuma, who'd taken a shine to him. She'd given him a small toy Jacobs ladder, that grew larger and twisted into all sorts of strange shapes...she said the original idea had come from Europe, on a ship, and so it was a good gift to take with him.

And at the end of the week...they would leave. Kagome was saddened, slightly, but she had already said a good many of her own goodbyes, to family and longtime friends. It was slightly easier to say goodbye to the newer friends she'd made in the South. Through it all, she was glad she did not have to say goodbye to Sesshoumaru. He was coming with her...

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At the end of the week, the big day came. Kagome was excited as she woke up that morning, and a little nervous. Shippo seemed to be mostly excited; he literally bounced off the walls, before Kagome asked him nicely to come down from the wall.

She had spent all week working on a few new presents, of a sort, for both him and Sesshoumaru, and she had hoarded a few new necklaces that were empty of miko power, for later. Illusion, on this trip, was a must.

Part of the agreement in sending the two ambassadors from the north, and the east, had been to give them necklaces; she'd done that yesterday. The Southern kitsune, of course, did not need it. But when among humans, act as they do...And so, before leaving the castle that morning, a few things had to be arranged. No youkai of the South was permitted within Nagasaki without some sort of illusion in place, or without the understanding that they should pretended to be human, at least. Some youkai were close enough to looking human that minimal, if any, disguise was needed...others needed more help.

In addition, she had made Shippo one. Shippo could do his own illusions very well, but they tired him a lot, and he couldn't hold them long enough at this point anyway. He was still a child, and didn't have the power he would one day have. He'd pouted a bit, but Kagome suspected he was secretly glad for the necklace, though the other kitsune had lectured him about not needing to depend on others for illusions all the time. When he was older...

He looked very nice, Kagome though. She'd done very little to change him, because she liked him as he was, although sometimes an illusion was necessary. Eye color, and the blackness of his hair were the only really noticeable things. That, and the obvious lack of tail and fox feet.

And, last but not least, Sesshoumaru. Kagome watched him from the corner of her eyes as they walked towards Nagasaki, the whole bunch of them. She had made him a gift as well, just as she had before, asking him to think of what he wished to look like, and turning his ideas into a working illusion.

He had chosen clothing cut in similar style, and in the colours of the West, though without the symbols of it. His skin ad darkened slightly from its usual paleness, and his hair was swept up in a topknot. He looked a little like a samurai. It was a very similar disguise to the one he had worn in modern day Tokyo, in fact – the only real difference was less discomfort in hiding, and in the way he fit into his own time with much more ease.

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They all trooped down to the docks after arriving in the city, and along the way, Kagome stared at the old city She had never really visited a popper city in the past, more towns than anything. It was sad in a way – Nagasaki reminded her, briefly, of a pale ghost of modern Japan. Like it or not, time moved forwards...

Tanuma, and a few others, led the way, as they were most familiar. Eventually, the Southern kitsune directed them to the tall man in the top hat identified by Ryakki as Ben. Tanuma hurried over to talk first, while Kagome looked around her. She wanted to reach over and hug Sesshoumaru – the strange forest of masts and rigging in the harbor was a reminder that this was new, this was strange...but at least she wasn't alone.

Kagome bent down and gave Shippo a hug – he seemed fascinated. Kagome smiled.

"Remember what I told you, okay Shippo? No reckless exploring, and no toys that will scare the poor sailors."

Shippo sighed, and nodded. Kagome gave him a quick hug, while Sesshoumaru watched, amused. He had a sudden vision of Shippo showing the sailors a giant rattlesnake, and the boat tipping upside down...

The moment lasted but briefly – Tanuma returned to them, Ben in tow, and said they were just about ready to cast off; their 'cargo' (a mountain of presents for the European youkai, basically) as well as the actual trading goods had been loaded, and the tide was right. After introductions and shaking hands, it was nearly time to go...

Kagome gave Tosa a brief hug, and then Satsuma. "Thanks for everything!" She smiled at both of them. "Without you, I don't know we'd have made it here..."

"The same to you, Kagome. We owe you much. Practice what I gave you; I expect it to be demonstrated on your return." Satsuma patted her on the arm.

"Gotch'ya! I'll make sure I do practice!" Kagome ginned at Tosa, who had been unceremoniously stuffed into a new shirt and plastered with a human illusion by his kitsune wife. He glowered back at her, as if daring her to comment.

"Nice to meet you, Kagome. Don't let Sesshoumaru be an idiot, okay? I mean, he _is_ an idiot, but try not to let it show as much as usual." Tosa sounded gruff, but the meaning was there.

Sesshoumaru smiled slightly at Tosa. "I should be fine. You take care of yourself, now. Hmn...you know, those are quite elegant clothes. I can bring you some from Europe, if you like...perhaps a hat like Ben's?"

Kagome nodded in the direction of the trader, who sported a large, tall, top hat and a grin, and laughed. Sesshoumaru...

"That would be very kind of you, Sesshoumaru" Satsuma smiled at Tosa. "Isn't it, dear?"

"Ah. Um..."

"Isn't it, Dear?" Satsuma nudged Tosa's shin with her pointy toe.

"Yes! Yes it is! And bring me a shinguard while you're at it..." Tosa ducked Satsuma's halfhearted swipe, still grinning. "Nya! Can't catch me...!"

Satsuma took off after him, grinning.

Sesshoumaru sighed, and shook his head slightly, long dark hair waving in its ponytail. "Tosa..." Familiar exasperation.

Kagome stared. The Lord and Lady of the South continued to run in circles like a pair of overgrown children. Well...she supposed that Satsuma was a kitsune, which _might_ possibly explain this...and it did actually look like fun! But...she just couldn't take them seriously...

Beside him, the trader, Ben, grinned and adjusted his top hat. "Now, don't I wish I could get away with _that_ more often...So. Shall we?" He made a funny little bow, and directed them towards the ship.

"You there! Klennard! Get those sails moving!"

Sesshoumaru followed Ben up the gangway, Kagome right behind him, carrying Shippo, and then the two other kitsune, all wearing human faces on the outside. It wouldn't do to frighten their amiable host with visions of strange youkai, of course...

Alone of the group, Kagome wore no disguise. She was not an ordinary human by any means, but she doubted the trader would know her for a miko, wearing white and green as she was. Even if he did realize – what of it? The rest of them looked nothing like youkai, after all, and she'd heard from Tanuma that most of the traders denied the existence of such anyway. He had no particular reason to care of she was a miko priestess or not, so it didn't matter. Besides...miko were human, and common enough.

Once on board, they were shown to their quarters. Sesshoumaru, Shippo and Kagome were in one cabin, the other two youkai in another.

As soon as they settled in, Shippo raced off to see his newfound "twice removed great uncle by his aunts cousin", as Ryakki had joked. Or whatever it had been - Kagome had no head for family tree lingo, sadly.

As soon as he'd gone, she slowly reached across to Sesshoumaru, holding onto his hand.

"Are you ready to go? It seems...kinda scary."

"As ready as I'll ever be to go to Europe..." He leaned in, and gave her a hug, catching her up in a tight embrace. Kagome threw her own arms around him, and held on. While he held her, nothing mattered; the journey, the strangeness of an unknown Empire, the problem of the gates...nothing mattered.

She withdrew from him, just enough to get a clear glance at brown-over-gold eyes, eyes that weren't his, but somehow, were. "Sesshoumaru..."

Kagome slowly gave him a kiss, mind whirling, thoughts of dreams, memories of tea and kitchens, of rainy nights and wet fur fluttering madly, racing as fast as her heart.

Sesshoumaru held onto her tightly, fingers wound through dark hair, breath a soft mist of warmth against her cheek. Intimate; a small world was made between their arms, eyes at the center. Eyes of the storm, as it were...

"I love you, Sesshoumaru." Kagome breathed softly, words wrapping around his ears like the scent of flowers. Her hands tightened, and she buried her face in his shoulder, eyes closed. It was enough to be here, with him. Enough to have finally said what was in her heart...

Soft skin on her cheeks; Sesshoumaru's eyelashes pressed close enough to be felt. "I love you too, Kagome." So quite she could barely hear, just feel, feel the happiness binding them together intangibly, but yet still as warm as his breath on her neck.

They stood like that for heartbeats; time wasn't measured in minutes, in that little world, just by actions, by words, by beating hearts, minds and hands entwined, by body and soul.

Only when the ship began to lurch did they reluctantly let each other go, and race for the deck. Public dignity was required. The ship was leaving...

On the shore, people were waving. Fellow traders were calling out in bits of what Kagome thought was English, and other tongues she couldn't identify (but maybe she should learn) and Japanese, from Tosa and Satsuma, Tanuma, calling out well wishes like any other group of people, whatever their origin, seeing their fellows off on a journey.

"Goodbye!"

They waved until the shore was distant, and the people on it mere specs of dust. Shippo, as soon as that happened, began to race around the ship, insatiably curious as to what everything was. He looked like any other child Kagome had seen, his face alight with curiosity. Perhaps a little bit smaller, but otherwise indistinguishable...except if he pulled out his kitsune toys, but he'd already been warned against that...

Kagome turned to face Sesshoumaru, face flushed slightly, voice low.

"I'm glad you're here with me, you know."

"So am I. I'll never leave, Kagome. Not unless you tell me to."

"Now why on earth would I do that?" Kagome smiled broadly at him.

"I don't know." Sesshoumaru smiled back at her, but not nearly as widely. Kagome might wear her heart on her sleeve, but his was more guarded in company. He was looking forwards to later, when perhaps they might have a little more time of their own.

He did, however, give her a slight squeeze on the shoulder before walking towards the back of the deck, to find Shippo. The little scamp had to be watched closely, he suspected...

He had been right; Shippo had been learning how to best scare sailors from his 'Uncle Ryakki.'

"Ryakki...is that a wise decision?" Sesshoumaru looked hard at the disguised fox. Ryakki hung his head slightly.

"Oh, probably not. But it was fun..." A slight grin,and then Ryakki was off, Shippo in close pursuit. "Why don't I show you small illusions instead, Shippo? Then you won't need that necklace anymore..."

Sesshoumaru sighed. It was a _very_ good thing Tanuma had told Ben that Ryakki was a magician, of sorts – hopefully that would cover any inconsistencies. That and they were all foreign to the sailors. They would likely expect strangeness. He expected it from them, at any rate.

He knew of 'real' magicians from others, people who pretended to grow flowers from hats, and stuff rabbits into them. Or something. It should work.

Anyway...he glanced at the sky. Dinner wouldn't be for a while yet. Perhaps he might suggest to Kagome that they should investigate that cabin some more...

It was a poor excuse, and he knew it, but it didn't matter now. He didn't particularly care if Ryakki and his fellow ambassadors found out or not. Even if they did...even if they told others...it didn't matter to him. They wouldn't return for quite a while anyway, and such talk was distant in the future.

Kagome had been concerned over Shippo, but the way Sesshoumaru saw it, at the moment Shippo was far more concerned with exploring the ship that would be their home for the next little while than with really paying attention.

He went to stand beside Kagome, and tenderly picked up her hand. There was so much he wanted to say to her...just to hold on, was all he asked. Hold on tight after all the rush of organizing that had resulted in this calm, perfect moment.

"Kagome?"

Kagome looked at him, eyes dancing. "Yes, Sesshoumaru?"

"Come with me..."

Kagome put her hand in his, smiling. "Wherever you want to go."

And while the sun set into the glittering waves, while Shippo chased a seagull, and sailors cursed from the rigging, they vanished into the depths of the ship. Together.

Whatever came, they would face it together, Kagome thought as she followed Sesshoumaru towards the cabin. She knew in her heart things would turn out for the best.

Mid step, premonition came, and went. Kagome saw as though through a mist two posts of stone, and a lintel slab of rock across. Like a transplanted Stonehenge, standing in the center of a Japanese garden...

The image faded, but the impression remained. Things would work out. She just knew it. It didn't mean she had to work any less hard to make things happen, but in the end...she was sure the gates were the right choice.

The cabin door closed behind them; Kagome stood facing Sesshoumaru, once again. Her hands seemed to travel of their own accord, wrapping around his waist. Wrapped together in fur, and arms, they were lost in their own little world again.

Idly, Kagome ran her fingers over his face, fingertips brushing bangs out of his eyes. Black, or silver, they were still his. Sesshoumaru's hand went to her own face, and cupped her cheek, light as butterfly breath on her chin. Just to hold on, to support the other...

"Love you."

Whispered.

And it didn't matter who said it; it was both.

1111111111111111

_...yeah, it sounds cliché. Damn. This is why I find it exceedingly hard to write fluff; anything I write sounds phony... I tried though...points for trying, at least? Lol. _

_Hope you liked the last chapter – Epilogue aside, this is the last one._

_No doubt you now all hate me for not following them to Europe. But...I didn't think it was necessary, really. I did do a little follow up in the epilogue that's on the heels of this one...:D Should be arriving soon – mostly done. I might, between now and then, post something of a oneshot as well. We'll see. It really depends on how much perl I have to deal with._

_Thank you for all the reviews last chapter! Hope you enjoyed this one, and the story in general._


	48. Epilogue

_Epilogue: Echoes_

_1865: Kyoto, Katsura Inn _

Kagome woke slowly, drifting up from sleep. The warm weight of a tail was draped across her chest, keeping her comfortable. Kagome smiled, and shifted slightly, arms snaking around the tall figure next to her, still sleeping. The covers were twisted; she could see the pale skin below his neck.

Sesshoumaru...

Kagome smiled. Sometimes it amazed her to think of how lucky she was, all through her long life. The fates had been harsh at times, but in the end, they had always smiled...

They were together, the two of them, and they had a very good life. That was all she really wanted, in the end. After all the twisted roads to get there, too...

Kagome paused. That had been years ago, now. But she still remembered it so clearly...

She remembered when they had left for the lands of the Dutch, so very long ago. The ship ride had been pleasant, certainly...but it had given them opportunities to talk, to share, to simply be together. Even with the kitsune that Tosa had sent, and the other ambassadors, they had found time alone. It had been the right way to go, to learn how to save the Japanese youkai. The gates had definitely been the correct choice – her premonition had been right.

It had also been a very good trip on a personal level...

Shippo had thoroughly enjoyed himself too, distracting the kitsune, having demanded to learn all sorts of kitsune tricks, which Ryakki had been only too happy to share. (sometimes, that hadn't been a good thing!) He had been all over the new information, playing, tricking sailors, learning things Kagome couldn't teach him. As long as he had the necklace she had given him before they left, he had been fine. Even the one time he'd forgotten it, he'd been good enough at illusion to simply scare the sailor into thinking he was a ghost.

It wasn't that he hadn't been able to make a human illusion then – it was simply that he couldn't have maintained it long enough. Sesshoumaru, of course, had never had that ability, so she'd helped him as well.

Kagome smiled. Shippo was all grown up now – and he was pretty successful, too. Tanuma had taken him under his wing in the south, and Shippo was having all kinds of fun in the game of information, the last time he'd sent her a letter. He would come to visit soon, he'd said...Kagome was, after all, his adoptive mother.

Delicately, she let her hand wander towards Sesshoumaru's sleeping face. He looked so peaceful, sleeping. There was something vulnerable about his closed eyes, the soft lids hiding the bright gold. The skin there was so very thin, and pale except for the bright magenta... He'd taken his necklace off the night before. He said falling asleep and waking up with it on was just too confusing. He had quite a collection of illusions, now that she'd given him...nearly one for every occasion.

Kagome didn't mind. Youkai were gone, a lot of them, and those that were left had grown accustomed to illusion. It did nothing to change who he was, just the surface. She did like being able to see him, though, the real him...

Kagome sat back slightly, resting her elbow on the sheets, holding her head in her hand, watching her lifemates chest slowly go up and down as he breathed.

That trip so long ago...Europe had been an eye opener, in more ways than one. While Tosa's emissaries, the Europeans (and occasionally Sesshoumaru) made pretty speeches at one another, she had learned far, far more than gateways...

It had to be attitude. Even now, Europe and Japan had different ways of doing things, humans and youkai both. They weren't quite as worried over the humans keeping their distance as Japan was. There were a fair number of bonds in Europe, like her own. People had been...far more accepting there. She and Sesshoumaru had started that trip in separate rooms, with Shippo next door to her...even if she'd taken to visiting sometimes, to cuddle. Still separate though.

She could still remember Shippo's mock outrage when he had found them kissing one day. _'Eww, gross! Cooties!' _

By the end of the trip, Shippo was still in his old room, but somehow her and Sesshoumaru's rooms had grown into one. She had learned so much about Sesshoumaru then. She still continued to. He was her best friend...and more.

She remembered the elaborate parties, the time they had ridden with the hunt across the Scottish moor, in pursuit of rabbits, that time, not humans. Whatever the legends of the wild hunt said now, they were wrong, Kagome had found. Old days had been different game, but since the gates...things had changed among the sidhe. She remembered the different creatures, the same intricate court dealings that had been in Aizu, and the carefree sort of life that had been found there...

Slowly, a golden eye opened. Kagome watched, smiling. "Finally awake, lazy?"

The eyes was all the way open now, and sparkling mischievously. "Lazy, eh? Who's 'lazy'? It's barely even light out..." Sesshoumaru yawned.

That was true – it was still very early for most. But that didn't stop her. "You! Lazybones..." Kagome gave him a playful nudge, and Sesshoumaru caught her hand with his, smiling.

He gave her a fierce hug, and grinned, still looking mischievous. "Lazybones? Hah!" He laughed, low in his throat. "You know...there are benefits to being 'lazy,' at times." Kagome could feel the lightest brush of fingertips against her shoulder blades, down her spine.

"Blasphemy! You, supporting laziness?" She mock gasped in outrage. "Don't let other people hear that!" The blanket flew through the air, landing on Sesshoumaru, and Kagome flew after it, pretending to ambush him, laughing. Pillows fell to the ground, unheeded, as Kagome caught Sesshoumaru with a kiss.

...It was actually fairly late in the morning by the time they emerged for breakfast.

---

Over a late breakfast, Sesshoumaru passed her some of the days requests. A family wanted to cross the gate in Kyoto, apparently, and he'd arranged for that to be in the morning only – in a half hour they would be at the shrine, waiting. Kagome had long since blocked this day from her calender in the afternoon. Sending people across took only a moment, as did checking for mail left for her to get from the other side.

The gate in Kyoto was hers to watch, at the moment. She checked for mail according to the pre-approved schedule, three times a week, and sent anything in the way of a letter left with her through as well. Sometimes people, too, crossed when she went for mail. It was a bit like a bus, or an old time mail station...a very minimal fee to send a letter, and the cost went up a little bit if it was a large parcel. Nothing for people to cross while she checked for mail, of course. That had been deemed an 'essential service.'

Sometimes appointments were made, from either side for people to cross, like now, and those were always dealt with as soon as they could be. _That_ cost a little extra because it wasn't at the scheduled time – the lords had spent a fair amount of time determining how the gates worked, and how to make a profit from it. (Choshu's idea – sometimes Kagome felt thing would be simpler if no one had any money) The gates were too important to be withheld to those too poor, or desperate, to find their way through, but you had to wait a few days...

She tended to check for mail at the same time as any extra appointments. Once a week, a major order would go through – packages, and things. Sesshoumaru helped her with those, lifting the heavier items. He also helped her to open the gate – most of it was her, but he helped to supply the necessary strength for maintaining the portal over a long period of time, as well as to add a little youki.

Kagome idly flipped through the worn book at her side, thinking. Breakfast was done; in a few minutes she should go open the shrine doors, both to the people who wished to pray, and to those crossing.

It had taken a long time, but she had actually organized the journal chronologically over the years, and had the loose papers bound.

"Funny, isn't it?"

"What is, Kagome?"

"Oh...everything. I was thinking about the trip to Europe, that first time, this morning. You remember, right?"

"Of course I do. You learned how to make a gate...and we found out a lot about the Empire." Sesshoumaru remembered the trip vividly – he'd rather enjoyed being, for the most part, free of obligations. The occasional court function, and studying a few times a week was quite relaxing compared to what his schedule usually was.

Which had been nice; it had left him time to send with Kagome. Very nice indeed...

"Yeah – they're a lot closer to humans there now, aren't they?"

"Not all of them – just the ones on the outside, and the gatekeepers. They're special. Just like ours..." Sesshoumaru smiled. Kagome was his special gatekeeper.

Kagome thought back to the first council after they had come back, and when everyone had been finally argued into acceptance of the gates. They'd spent so long hammering out a system...and exploring the newly discovered part of 'underhill' attached to Japan. It was possible to travel the underlands and get to the European Empire that way, but sometimes it was easiest to do that in the world above.

Underhill, so to speak, was now bustling. There were several towns, and a city near as large as old Aizu. Some were more conservative than others, and there were even some that were full of hanyou, and humans who also wished to go underground. It was large enough for all. Space behaved differently under there.

Aboveground...there was still a fair number of youkai. All of the lesser youkai had since perished or moved below, but a great many of the stronger, more humanoid youkai remained. A lot of kitsune had stayed above – it was more entertaining there, they said. Tosa and Satsuma had stayed too – Tosa had decided to go into business, last she heard. He was making a very tidy profit, to boot...

It had taken a little bit longer to convince the youkai council that humans would be needed in the equation, that they would have to have more than one gate...and to grant all the humans attached to the gates neutrality. It would hardly do to have them attacked by youkai!

She and Sesshoumaru looked after the gates – they had been put in charge. Over the years more miko, more priests and youkai, had done the same, followed her and Sesshoumaru's example and bonded, had agreed to help.

There were few enough of them, but enough for the job. It helped that some of them lived longer than normal, too. It was easier to train men and women who would stick around for a long time, enough that they could get really really good at what they did.

Normally, Kagome's gate was stationed in the Western capitol, close to Sesshoumaru's home. It was in a field, in a mound build around a dolmen, three rocks. Two posts and a lintel. It had been too romantic to resist, and she had liked the way the dolmen of Europe looked, like proper formal gateways...

She had switched with the Kyoto gatekeepers, Yaki and her Buddhist friend Arameki for the next few years. All because of this book...

Kagome closed the old journal, and smiled at Sesshoumaru. "I don't know about the other gatekeepers – but you're very special, Sesshoumaru." She winked, grinning.

"Now who's being silly?" Sesshoumaru gave her a hug. "Come on – lets get this done with so the afternoon is free."

He pulled out a necklace, and slipped it on, becoming nothing more than a guard for hire, to most. Kagome had spread many many necklaces among the youkai over the years, as had some of the other miko powerful enough to do so.

Kagome got up from the table, and together, they left to head towards the Buddhist shrine where the gate had been anchored. It had once been Arameki's – that was why he had chosen it as a gate location. Kagome was looking after it for him.

_1865: Kyoto, Kamigamo Shrine, Nishimura House._

Kagome walked along the street, alone, leaving the shrine after the mornings work. Most people in Kyoto tended to walk in clusters, but she never had. Satsuma, true to her word, had trained her on her return from Europe, after giving her an exam...Kagome was always best with the bow, but she definitely had a mean roundhouse by now, among other things.

And in the worst case...she could always disappear. She hadn't ever needed to, but she could.

She thought back to the time they had returned from Europe; Kagome had been glad to come home, but some things that had happened that year still echoed, made her sad.

The well had closed while she had been gone, and no amount of forcing could open it...there was only a note left as explanation. _"In time."_

She missed her family, at times, but there was always hope in her heart that she might one day see them again. She knew _when_ she had left for Europe, when she could return to visit them in 'her own time' (whatever that was now) and see them again...She tried to learn about the well in the meantime, curious as to why it had closed, and how it had worked in the first place...it had become a hobby, of sorts. One day...one day she might live to see it, if she was lucky, life to see her family again...

Ah – here she was.

Kagome slowly climbed the steps of the other shrine, swishing her red hakama restlessly, motions still carrying over the busy emotions of this morning. Working on the portal earlier had been hard – they had had to send through an entire extended family of forty two as it turned out, an entire small tribe of lesser kitsune that had decided they wanted to move to the under-lands, rather than bother with illusion all the time. A little more difficult - usually only a few people wanted through at once.

Some youkai, even now, wanted to leave. Fewer than at the time of the great migration (privately dubbed the 'year of the never ending headache' by Kagome – the portal sometimes gave her one when it was used that much...) but still, enough. They wanted to join relatives, or even wanted only to visit, could not hide, or disliked needing to hide. All sorts of reasons.

It wasn't that she resented them for it, really. Family was important, to youkai as well as humans. Hers was important work, one that needed a great deal of power and concentration, and she and Sesshoumaru did their part gladly. It was...just that she had hoped that today would go well. And that she would be operating on all cylinders, not just a third of them. Oh well – she'd managed before.

Sesshoumaru had decided to stay at home for the rest of today – they both had thought it was for the better. Kagome had, for once, worn a popper red miko uniform, while he did his part. After all – a traveling miko was not married, and he, currently disguised as a guard, or an invisible youkai...those did not need to come with her. He had, instead, lent her a bit of a boost against the days activities yet to come.

She was grateful to him for it - at least, Kagome thought, the slight tiredness should go away within the hour. For both of them. Youkai healing was something she had always appreciated.

They had learned, over the years, to use that link for many things. Kagome could even, at short distances and after much practice, send mental messages like a short range radio. Healing, power, feelings – it could be used to share a great many things. Occasionally that had been an embarrassment in the past, when they were both still learning – but by now it was normal, welcome. The day her mind ever became silent, was left alone, Kagome was sure she would feel more lonely than she had ever, ever been before. She had seen a youkai once, in Europe whose partner had died. The youkai had lost the will to live...he hadn't survived the unknown partner by much. She didn't think, if she ever lost Sesshoumaru, that she'd really want to live much either. But luckily for her, old age was far, far away, and there was little chance of an untimely death. She didn't think of it much.

Kagome resolved to make it up to Sesshoumaru tonight. She'd bring him something from the market, perhaps. She had been delighted when another Dutch trader named Klennard had finally,_ finally,_ reintroduced chocolate to Japan! In some ways, that made him her hero. Shippo had gone with her to the market and they had both bought crates of the stuff...!

Sesshoumaru had laughed at them both, but oh well. Kagome smiled widely as she thought of that, and of other things. My, she was in a reflective mood today...perhaps it was just that today was an important one.

Sesshoumaru had grown to like a few select 'human foods' as he insisted on calling them over the years. (Though he'd never admit it!) Maybe she'd get him marzipan, or raspberries. He loved those...all the sweet things of Europe had grown on him, when they had visited. The youkai there all had insatiable sweet tooths!

Kagome smiled, remembering the first time she had brought him things from the ships, remembering the day, spent with him mock grumbling, and her wandering carelessly though the market. It had been a good day, and a beautiful evening. Kagome remembered the many nights she had seen the moon shining on silver hair. It had been a fun day, and a wonderful night...

Slowly, Kagome mounted the steps of the shrine, a small smile in place. She had long ago read the journal from her 'present,' in its entirety, handed down from Meiji, seen it written where Amiritsu appeared, the woman who had helped Jinoue, and herself, so very much...

Kagome was here today to see her – and to thank her, if possible, in some small way. She had had her suspicions for a number of years now as to who it might be. But...she had wanted to make sure. The author of the journal - Jinoue – had met Amiritsu while running to put out a fire in the kitchen – she had, in fact, tripped over the visiting miko.

This had been admitted, rather bashfully, before moving onto a greatly detailed account of the new litter of kittens she'd helped nurse that same day. Kagome was grateful to note that there was a very specific date that this had occurred on.

Kagome scanned the buildings with her hand over her eyes. No one else was really in view. No possible Amiritsu's were running about the courtyard. And nothing appeared to be smoking, at least...not that she could see.

She took a second sweep of the buildings with her 'other sent of senses,' as she liked to call them. The people in the immediate vicinity seemed to be normal. No alarm, no sense of anything out of the ordinary. A bit of general worry from all the occupants over the state of Kyoto, but that was expected; nowhere in Japan could that worry be escaped. In 1852, the black ships had appeared, exactly as Kagome remembered from a long distant history class. Everything had changed, after, and if it hadn't yet, it would soon...

She'd started preparations for the coming revolution, herself...she'd have to try and do a few more things to prepare while she was at it in the next few months, or year. Networking, trying to remember where the most danger had been, brushing up on her own skills at hiding, and going to ground...she'd have to do it again soon. Only one more time to do that – she and Sesshoumaru had gone to ground before, they could again. Kagome had to admit, her skill with illusions was handy there. Walking the streets unseen was a very easy way to get herself and Sesshoumaru or anyone else out of town fast without a fight. And if it came to a fight, even with hitokiri, Sesshoumaru always won anyway – she wasn't worried.

Well...that was just the way of things, wasn't it? In the worse possible case, they could always nip over into the underground for a while. It wasn't a very good choice, because they wouldn't really be able to get in touch with the rest of the world, or help those on this side as well, but...at least the option was there, though she seriously doubted she'd need it, ever.

A lot had changed in her since she had helped Sesshoumaru to defeat Damia, and they had agreed to become the chief gatekeepers for the next 500 years. More had changed in the word around her, and within both her and Sesshoumaru. She had learned so much of her own power, from Kaede, from others after her. Sesshoumaru had learned with her, learned together about each other. Kagome might not have been very well trained even when she had met Sesshoumaru, but by now...she could do things she'd never thought she'd ever be able to do. Kaede had told her once she had near the power of Midoriko, and with more training, the same finesse of skill. Kagome was sure part of that was being overstated, but it was definitely true that she had had a few hundred odd more years to practice than normal...finesse was definitely in her repertoire now.

Kagome reflected on how much Sesshoumaru had opened up over the years – to her at least. He was still mostly the same surly, cold person to most of the rest of youkai kind, with few exceptions. About what could be expected, really. He wasn't as harsh, perhaps, but Kagome had never thought he would change, not even when they had finally managed to get both of their own feelings into the open.

She didn't want him to change, because she loved him for who he was.

Besides – seeing him snap at people when she knew he was only being that way to get them to work harder, not out of any particular meanness, was slightly entertaining...

She never would have guessed how good an actor he could be. Or that he didn't mind – actually enjoyed – the outings which required one or both of them to disguise themselves in some fashion. Little tiny quirks here and there – they made life interesting.

Kagome stopped scanning as a small flicker of more-than-usual-worry washed over one of the novices. She turned her attention towards it, letting her inner musings go. There would be plenty of time later. There was always time, if you made a space for it to come into your life.

She paid careful attention with her miko's senses as the person next to the flames panicked, and ran for water. Just like superman – she could see behind walls! Well, not really, but...walls were no barrier to sensing emotion...

A few minutes later, her distracted eyes picked up the plume of smoke, but mostly, she remained concentrated on her own view of 'inside.' There was no one else around, luckily, but she still would not stand by and see people hurt. Houses were easy enough to rebuild – people were harder, if they could be fixed at all. She'd have to watch, make sure the flame didn't spread...

In fact, she was concentrating so hard that she completely forgot to check behind her every so often.

Consequently, she was rather surprised to find that same, panicky novice miko behind her, having bowled both of them over without her noticing in time to move out of the panic-blinded girls way.

Kagome, after a second or so to catch her breath, looked over at the slightly plump, wide eyed girl stretched out in the dirt beside her, and then laughed softly. She might have known, all along...

"Anything I can help you with, miss...?"

"You can call me fire, er, I mean.. Jinoue. And there's a fire! You have to come help!" The girl was close to tears. Kagome closed her eyes, trying terribly hard not to laugh. She extended a hand, and hauled the girl to her feet, turning towards the fat plume of smoke.

Murphy. Or fate. Or some twisted sense of narrational humor.

"My name is...Amiritsu, I suppose. Now – what's this about a fire?"

_2001: Outskirts of Tokyo, Sunset Shrine._

Mrs. Higurashi sighed as she watched her daughter disappear through the well, again. Europe...

She wondered when Kagome would be back this time. It seemed she hadn't been home for so long...and then she hadn't stayed very long at all. Sakura crossed her arms against the sudden chill. When would she come back? Even with airplanes and modern convenience, to travel that far was an event. They didn't really have the money for it, in their family, either.

Money – that reminded her. Chihero was coming by again in a week, in the evening. She'd forgotten it, with Kagome coming.

She glanced back at the well house, silent once more, as the wind picked up and she got her father back inside, out of the cold. The image of Kagome's cheery wave, and bright smile burned within her mind, and of the taller Sesshoumaru, hand's clasped tightly. She wondered...

She remembered Inuyasha, and how Kagome had once been rather attached to him. She had thought it was a nice thing for her daughter to be interested in someone a little more real, then, to be looking after Inuyasha. He'd needed it, poor boy...

She wondered what lay between her and Sesshoumaru. Whatever it was, she hoped Kagome would be happy. That was really the most important thing.

---

Sakura Higurashi opened the door a week later, and smiled. "Come in, Chihero..." The rain pounded on the outside of the building. Poor Chihero looked wet as a drowned rat...She paused, seeing a vague shape behind her guest, in the rain. "Oh! More guests! Do come in, its cold out there..."

And then Sakura Higurashi stopped, and got a good look at who it was.

"Kagome!?"

"Mom!" Kagome gave her a fierce hug, eyes wet – or was it the rain? "I've come back...for good this time."

For good? Sakura Higurashi hugged Kagome just as tight, noticing little differences, more lines. This was not the same Kagome she had let go of last week...she was a lot older, now. How had that happened? Why was she back so soon...? What of Europe...? There was a great deal of explaining to do, she sensed.

But Kagome's eyes were the same, and her laugh.

And to Sakura, that was all that mattered.

---

_Mwahahaha. Some things were plotted from the beginning – I wonder if some of you guessed. Probably did. I'm not __**that**__ subtle. An open ending, perhaps, but those are always fun. Because stories don't end in real life – they just keep going. _

_I hope you've enjoyed this story as much as I've enjoyed writing it. This would be the last chapter of Unsung Silence. (Technically, the epilogue) It's come as far as I care to take it. I have no idea yet what else I'll write,(in terms of other stories, totally unrelated to this one. I will not be writing more of Unsung, or any sort of sequels, for a few of you who asked.) or if I will. There is a oneshot of Europe currently posted – I sincerely doubt there will be more, but feel free to look at the one if you like. (called 'Seals') University is quite a demand on my time, and I'm not particularly motivated at the moment to write anything besides perl. We'll see... _

_I'm still amazed at how many people have read this story...and then taken the time to leave me such lovely reviews. I appreciated them all, and I'm glad that some of you have stayed with the story from the beginning, infrequent updates aside. Thank you so much for reviewing, and leaving me feedback! Meant a lot. _

_I'm even more surprised that this story actually won a few things, but it did. For those of you who voted for Unsung Silence, and who put the story forward, thank you so much!_


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